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Soulmates: Reality Proved
by Lydia Martin, California Beacon, for the New York Times
After millennia of searching, uncertainty and doubt, proof of the soulmate sign has finally been irrefutably confirmed.
The day Stiles Stilinski held up a bottle emblazoned with the word ‘soulmate’ started a media circus like no other. Now, though, the actor has come out publicly with both the name of his soulmate and their plans for the future. And that would be a coming out in more ways than one, because not only have the couple become the world’s first objectively confirmed soulmate couple, but they are proof that the universe does not discriminate against same sex relationships.
“We were amazed at the support we received from most people,” Stilinski says, neatly sidestepping the issue of the some of the more vilifying comments received by both Stilinski and his confirmed soul mate, photographer Derek Hale. Stilinski and Hale both refused to comment on the three lawsuits which have been filed by attorney Jackson Whittemore within the past few days against the worst offenders.
Most objections to the idea of same sex soulmates, however, died down when the photo - which has widely become known as The Image - was released by this reporter in an earlier piece (see image, left). The shot, showing Stilinski looking directly at the camera, the soulmate sign visible and clear, was taken by Hale and has subsequently been confirmed by independent experts as being conclusive proof of the moment two soulmates first laid eyes on each other.
Once again, science has taken up the baton of fighting prejudice, only now the universe is on their side in the battle against bigotry and hatred.
Meanwhile, two men are happily building a life and a family together.
Hale accompanied Stilinski to the world premiere of Stilinski’s soulmate movie Written in the Stars, where Stilinski made a point in showing off his significant other. Pointing out that the majority of comments concluded that Hale had lucked out with finding a famous soulmate, Stilinski avowed that he was the lucky one.
“There’s a moment when you realize that someone has filled the perfect space in your life, the place you were waiting for them to find, and you know that’s it. They’re the one,” he told reporters on the red carpet outside his review before wrapping an arm around his boyfriend as the two shared an adoring look.
Any doubt about the casual way the couple has dealt with the media attention since coming out - and the talk of a future together after only weeks - fades away after watching them interact. After the pomp and circumstance of the Stilinski Soulmate Search and the assumptions around who the lucky woman would be, the natural dynamic of Stilinski-Hale seems like a breath of fresh air, and a world away from the clear media ploy that had been the ‘Search’.
Stilinski talks openly now about his regret for that entire chapter of his life. “It was never real. I knew it wasn’t right at the time. I knew I was never going to find my soulmate that way, but I was under a lot of pressure and in a lot of shock. It took me some time and - no pun intended - a lot of soul searching to realize that, no matter what the consequences, my happiness was more important than anything else. My career could bring me fame and fortune, but without love, that meant nothing.”
When asked whether he thinks he led on any of the women from the press conference, Stilinski smiles with that now famous wide grin and lively whiskey eyes as he takes the hand of his soulmate. “A wise person once told me that for me to be someone’s soulmate they have to be mine as well.”
Neither Stilinski nor Hale will comment on the matter directly, but there is no doubt that Stilinski very publicly fired his manager on the night of the Soulmate Ball. While Stilinski and Hale were thrust abruptly into the spotlight the very next day, the handling of the resulting storm of questions was managed with a very different feel. There seems no doubt that this was the result of a change in direction from Team Stilinski.
And a welcome change in direction it was. The media manipulation and gross commercialisation of the initial days of the Stilinski Soulmate Story leave a dirty taste in the mouth for those who do believe in true love, in soulmates (and maybe even those of us who don’t). Even more so now that the truth is well and truly out.
Unless you have been living under a rock, you have seen the YouTube video that would have gone viral, even without the soulmate angle. Stilinski, rising star, celebrity crush, playing peek-a-boo with a baby instead of focusing on important questions from an original and dynamic reporter (that would be me…). It was video gold at any time. That baby was the daughter of the man who would turn out to be his soulmate and while publicly Stilinski was looking for his one, true, female love, privately things were very different.
“It was natural,” Stilinski says. “Just like breathing. It was pretending it wasn’t really there that was the hard part.”
Hale doesn’t blame him for events, the slightly older man is quick to add. “We both needed that time,” he says. It is easy to tell that he wants people to take that seriously, since mostly Hale is happy to let Stilinski speak for the both of them. The roles work well - Stilinski always looks as though he’s about to burst if he can’t speak. Hale, on the other hand, seems to prefer silence and meaningful facial expressions. In this, however, he is passionately vocal. “Not admitting it straight away allowed us to get to know each other as people, not just as soulmates.”
That may be the truth for them, but as an observer and seeing the way that they come across as two halves of the same whole, one can’t help but wonder if it wasn’t just unfair - making them wait so long to be able to be together.
The idea of proving the soulmate theory is obviously more than a celebrity couple finding what we can only hope is happiness. It brings up the romantic notion of finding that one person that’s perfect for you. The person who understands you in ways you don’t understand yourself.
It also changes the idea of dating. People are already beginning to ask what is the point of dating someone without knowing if they’re your soulmate, or what it means to date someone who you know isn’t. There doesn’t seem to a be a right answer one way or another. What does seem right is the way that Stilinski and Hale seem to fit together, the ease of their comfort around one another and the obvious love that radiates from being in their presence.
Statistically speaking, we remain unlikely to ever find our soulmate. But now we know that out there, somewhere, they are there. Maybe waiting.
Let the hunt begin.