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Having a kid was hard.
Having five kids was difficult.
Having nineteen kids was a nightmare.
Somehow, though, the Kane’s made due.
Every morning started with cameras. There was only a couple minutes throughout the day or early early in the morning when Jonathan and Patrick got some peace and time alone.
Today was not one of those mornings.
There was a cameraman in the corner of the room – his name was Timothy – who was the morning filmer.
Patrick waved at Timothy from the warmth of the bedsheets. Timothy smiled and waved back.
“So I have a meeting with Alexis teacher at four.” Jonathan told his husband, rubbing circles on the top of Pat’s hand, “Apparently, she's been selling the things we put in her lunchbox to other students. A dollar each.”
“That's my girl.” Patrick grinned smugly.
“Don't you dare.” Jonathan glared. “She's eleven, Patrick, and it's illegal.”
“Okay, okay, sorry.” The latter admitted defeat, “Do you need me to pick up Nolan from football practice then?”
“If you can. It'll be easier. I can pick up Lacy and the triplets from the elementary school and go to the Intermediate from there.”
Jonathan and Patrick had met at Sharpy’s wedding. They were both a friend of Sharpy’s and were both two of his groomsmen. Patrick had taken one look of Jonathan’s ass and deemed him his future husband.
He wasn't wrong, because two years later, both at the ripe age of twenty, got married.
Neither thought they'd be able to conceive, so of fucking course, they didn't use protection.
And then, Jonathan had a rude awakening when a doctor shoved a positive pregnancy test in his face and said, “Congratulations, you’re pregnant!”
He and Pat hasn't even been married a year.
But nevertheless, Jonathan went through with the pregnancy, and nine months later, he gave birth to a baby boy they named Will.
They started using protection, but alas, condoms and birth control didn't work too long, because when Will turned one, Jonathan was two weeks pregnant with their second.
Jonathan had a boy again, and they named him Nolan.
Extra-strength birth control, the Plan B pill, and condoms only worked for a year and a half. It was even worse this time, because they had twins, and again, both were boys.
But holding Lance and Luca in the hospital bed, seeing Will and Nolan gush over them, they decided to give a bigger family a chance. Plus, they really wanted a daughter.
They took precautions, of course, vitamins and ate special diets to assure Patrick was giving all he could and Jonathan’s body was healthy and safe to carry more children.
Jonny learned he was expecting a girl again three days before Patrick’s birthday. That was Pat’s main gift. He cried. It's on video, too.
Mandy was born in a storm, at home, because she just wanted to get the fuck out.
Eventually came Chrissa and Chris, the next set of twins, Peter, Jace, Alexis, Patrick III (or P.J.), Nicky, Lacy, the triplets: Hunter, Wes, and Keaton, Dylan, Tristan, and Mia.
They became the latest hit tv show, 19 Kids and Counting.
Nineteen kids, plus one, the little girl that Jonathan was currently nine months pregnant with.
Patrick ran a hand up and down Jonny’s stretched-out abdomen. “I should get ready for work.”
Jonathan hummed. “Yeah, I need to pack up the kids’ lunches.”
They waited a couple more minutes before they heard a hockey goal horn going off – Will’s alarm. The boy was twenty and in college, and his first class weren't until ten in the morning, but he always got up with the kids to help out his parents.
“That's our cue.” Jonathan sighed as a chorus of groans, cries, and agitated, “Turn that shit off!”
“Daddy! Nolan said a bad word!”
“Tattle tale!”
“Meanie head!”
“Papa!”
Patrick got to his feet and walked to the other side of the bed, holding out his hands. Jonathan locked his with Pat’s and together, they hoisted him up.
“I'll take the babies, you take the teens.” Jonathan nodded at his husband.
Patrick nodded back, “Team Kane. Ready set go.”
They clasped hands and took off – well, Jonny waddled – to their posts. What a way to start the mornings.
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“Is it hard, taking care of ninteen kids, and Jonathan while he’s pregnant?” The producer asked, aiming the camera at both of them.
“You better watch yourself.” Jonathan glared pointedly at Pat.
Patrick smirked in amusement. “Oh, it's tough. Ninteen kids screaming and crying. Seven teenagers, three...four tweens I guess. That leaves- one, two, three- eight toddlers?”
Jonathan quirked an eyebrow. “You think you have it hard? I pushed out all ninteen of those kids.”
“Things get messy.” Patrick laughed, and next to him, Jonathan grinned a little. “But that's the fun of it. Why would we have twenty kids if we couldn't handle it?”
“Not twenty yet.” Jonny grinned, patting his stomach.
“Soon though!” Patrick turned to his husband.
“Don't seem so excited. Mia gave me thirteen hours of hell. I’ll break you in that delivery room.” Jonathan quipped.
Patrick leaned back in his chair, laughing.
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“Pops, where’s the mayo? I need it for the chicken salad.” Nolan called out, elbowing Will in the abs from behind. “Get off me, jerk, and pass me the pepper.”
“Oh Nols, you'll make such a good housewife one day.” Nolan teased.
“Willy,” Nicky giggled, looking up from his coloring circle with Lacy, PJ, and Wes, “Nolan’s not a girl! He wouldn't be a wife!”
“Nolan can be whatever he wants to be,” Lance grinned, waving a spoon around, “He's a strong, independent man who don't take no one’s shi-”
“If you finish that sentence, I'll get your dad on your butt.” Patrick interrupted him, smiling broadly and scooping Hunter up when he came barreling into him.
Lance blushed and quickly went back to making dinner. “Sorry, Pops.”
Patrick hummed, “Mhm. Sure.”
Dinner was always a sight to see. They had four long tables pushed against each other. Jonny sat at the very head of the table, Patrick to his right, and the kids would just fill in wherever they wanted.
The older kids usually pitched in to make dinner, to help Jonathan, since there was so many people to feed and Jonny wasn't at his quickest, what with being nine months pregnant.
They set the table with food and silverware, then sat down to eat. They ignored the cameras, they'd gotten so used to them.
It was Alexis’s turn to say grace, and when she was done, they dug in.
“Did Nolan tell you?” Luca asked, glancing up from his food to look at his fathers.
“Luca.” Nolan whined.
“Tell us what?” Jonathan questioned.
“Nolan got voted Captain of the football team.” Luca grinned, shooting a teasing look to his older brother.
“Why didn't you say anything?” Patrick ruffled his son’s hair from across the table, earning a sharp slap on the arm from Jonny.
“Cause it wasn't a huge deal.” Nolan shrugged.
Jonny saw right through him.
He knew Nolan was extremely pleased that he made Captain. It's been something he had been wanting for the longest time. It definitely was a huge deal.
“Yeah, little Nolan’s finally growing up!” Will teased.
“Mhm. Sure is.” Patrick agreed. “Oh, Nol, how's Mr. Fuzzyfinkle?”
Nolan went bright red. “I-I don't know what you're talking about.”
“Sure they do,” Lacy giggled, “You can't hide your stuffed seahorse from Daddy when we clean!”
“Lacy,” Nolan and Will groaned at the same time. Nolan huffed. “We told you to stay out of our room!”
“Please, boys,” Chrissa scoffed, “When one of us does the chores with Dad, that rule goes out the window.”
“Wait,” Wes gasped, “Does that mean you've been in my room!?”
The table burst into laughter, and Mia – she was two – squealed happily, banging her hands on the high chair tray. Jonathan cooed at her and gave her his glass of water, the little girl drinking it eagerly, then setting it down with a loud ‘ah!’
A couple other kids, plus Jonny and Patrick, mimicked her, making her shriek excitedly. Mimicking the little sounds the babies make has become a second nature to the Kane’s.
After a little more talking and rolls being thrown across the table, the kids began cleaning up.
Jonathan went to stand, but the child he was carrying began rapid-fire kicking him in the gut. He sat back down and leaned back in his chair, rubbing his bump to try to soothe her.
“Hey,” Patrick walked over, leaning down to kiss his forehead, “Are you okay?”
“Mhm.” The latter nodded. “She's just kicking again. Really hard.”
“Why don't we go upstairs and I can bring you a hot water bottle.” The blonde suggested.
“The table-”
“Can be cleaned by the kids. Jonny, we have nineteen. There's enough for a hockey team. You need to rest.”
Jonathan sighed as Chris walked in, coming to get another round of plates. Patrick called him over. “Help me take your dad upstairs. Jade’s making him uncomfortable.”
Chris quickly agreed and together, they led Jonny upstairs and eased him onto the bed.
“Go find Chrissa and ask her to fill up a hot water bottle.” Patrick told his son.
Chris nodded. “Yeah, sure thing.”
Jonathan grabbed his hand and squeezed it. “I love you.”
Chris smiled and kissed his cheek. “Love you too, Dad.”
__________________
There weren't any cameras, what with it being two in the morning. There wouldn't be any this early until Jade was born.
Patrick laid next to Jonny, Jon’s back pressed against his chest. His face was pressed into Jon’s shoulder, soothingly.
He did this a lot whenever Jonny was pregnant – stay up and worry.
Jonny’s last pregnancy with Mia was difficult, more so than other pregnancies. The morning sickness was worse and he was constantly exhausted. The labor was hell, thirteen hours of strong contractions and harsh kicking. Doctors were thinking of doing a C-Section, when Jonny hit ten centimeters and was finally able to get her out.
Jonny had had C-Sections before. He had one with Chrissa and Chris, PJ, Dylan, and the triplets.
Chrissa and Chris were Jonny’s second set of twins, refusing to birth more than one baby at the same time after Lance and Luca. That was hell. The triplets fell under that same category.
Dylan was flipped breech, and doctors deemed it too dangerous for Jonny to deliver naturally.
PJ, however, was a tricker story. Jonny had gotten mild preeclampsia and was forced to have a C-Section right at eight months pregnant. Both PJ and Jonny were fine in the end, PJ being in the NICU for a couple weeks, but it still scared the shit out of Patrick.
They named him after Pat because he reminded them both of Patrick – stubborn, never makes things easy, but is a fighter.
Patrick’s worried it'll happen again.
But Jonathan seemed to be handling the pregnancy well. Nolan was his easiest pregnancy, barely any morning sickness, cravings were down to a minimum, and Nolan wasn’t very violent with the kicking, unlike the triplets.
Still, Jonathan was used to the many side effects of pregnancy. Pat didn’t know how he did it. He’d be complaining every chance he got. Jonny seemed to make it so easy.
Jonny was absolutely perfect.
__________________
Shopping was always interesting.
They had three cars that each fit seven people. Jonathan would usually drive one of the cars, but Patrick and the older kids refused to let him drive when he was pregnant. It annoyed him, just a little, but knew their hearts were in the right places.
Patrick mainly drove one of them, with Jonny in the passenger's seat. The other drivers would be dispersed among Will, Nolan, Luca, and Lance. Most of the time, it ended up being Will and Nolan, since they were the oldest. It gave Jonny and Pat a small sense of peace, since they’d been driving longer than the twins.
“We’ve gotten video of the family shopping. What’s it like, from you guys’s perspectives?”
Wes, Keaton, and Hunter giggled, seated on the stools in front of the green background.
“It’s fun,” Hunter replied, and his brothers nodded in agreement, “There are- groups, and group leaders, and we go around the store getting things for Daddy and Papa.”
“We need paper towels,” Lance announced, crouching down to the triplets, “Can you guys go down the aisle and grab a bunch of paper towels? We need five bags. Can you do that?”
The triplets cheered and ran down to the paper towel section, grabbing a bunch of packages, while Luca and Lance looked for napkins and throw away forks.
“Who are the group leaders?”
Peter and Jace were in chairs, a blue background behind them, Dylan on Jace’s lap and Tristan on Peter’s.
“Will,” Peter responded, “Nolan, and Luca and Lance. Cause they’re the oldest.”
“They always get to do the most stuff, cause they’re older.” Jace rolled his eyes. “They’re bossy.”
“Jace, go with Alexis and Nicky to find some lunch meat.” Will told him, tossing in packs of cheese and bacon.
“Chris! Mandy! Don’t race the carts!” Nolan shouted. “When you run into the wall and injure yourself, don’t blame me!”
“But you love them, though.”
Peter and Jace nodded reluctantly, but just Dylan grinned and shook his head. Tristan blinked.
“Is it hard, group leaders?”
Nolan leaned back on his stool, only to nearly fall off because it’s a stool, Nolan. Will and Lance grabbed him before he tumbled off.
“You idiot.”
“Shut up.”
“It’s hectic.” Lance answered, “We have groups of, like, four or five kids, running around everywhere.”
“Yeah, you have one group by the produce,” Will chuckled, “One by the dairy, one at the snacks, one just wandering.”
“We have an hour to get what we need and meet back up at the front of the store,” Luca explained, “Dad’ll have our butts if we don’t.”
“Do your parents group with any kids?”
“Yeah, they take the babies,” Chrissa nodded, shoving Chris away when he tried to elbow her, “Stop it, you child. Dad and Pops usually have Dylan and Mia, and Jade when she’s born.”
“It’s pretty fun, though,” Chris shrugged, “We might not be group leaders, but it’s still cool.”
__________________
One of the things Jonathan loved about his family was how much they adored the babies.
When he says babies, he's talking about the five year olds and below. The older kids were very protective of the baby Kane’s.
They also really, really loved Jonny’s bump.
Jonathan would be standing by the stove, cooking, and Will would walk over to get something from the cupboard, and he'd tap Jonny’s bump in hello.
The older girls would gush over it, and any time one of the little ones would get to rough around the bump, she girls would shoo them away.
The babies, though, they probably loved it the most.
They would cuddle up against Jonathan on the couch and talk to the baby, pressing their hands and faces against it. Patrick found them once laid out against the couch, Dylan, Mia, and the triplets cuddling Jonny’s baby bump, all fast asleep.
“How’s Miss Jade doing today?” Mandy asked, walking into the family living room as they set up for Family Movie Night.
“Surprisingly quiet. I think she's asleep.” Jonathan replied, leaning back in the loveseat.
“Maybe you can finally get some peace.” Chrissa hummed as she brought in the second large bowl of popcorn, the first already on the table.
“One can only hope.” Joked Jonny.
The family gathered in the living room, sitting in chairs and couches and on the floor. There were blankets and pillows thrown about as the family got cozy. Patrick nestled in next to Jonathan, Dylan curled up on Jon’s other side. Mia toddled happily over to Nolan, who picked her up with a grin.
They put on Peter Pan, because all of the kids loved it. Patrick rested his hands on Jonny’s bump, pressing his nose to Jonny’s temple.
“I have to work a little later tomorrow,” Pat whispered, “We’re finishing up a project. The company’s got a bunch of investors flying in tomorrow night. We have a meeting with them in a couple days and we’re going to present it.”
They looked over simultaneously when Mia shrieked. She was jumping up and down, standing on Nolan’s thighs with his hands around her sides, as ‘We Can Fly’ started playing in the movie. “Fly, fly, fly!” She cheered.
“Are you going to be okay here alone?” Patrick asked, turning back to his husband. “Will has football practice, so he won’t be home until five thirty.”
“I’ll be fine, Pat,” Jonathan mumbled, keeping his volume down so he didn’t disturb the kids, “Most of the kids get out at three fifteen, and Nolan has early dismissal every Wednesday at two thirty.”
“I know, but I’m usually home by twelve thirty. That’s two hours alone.” Patrick worried his bottom lip between his teeth.
Jonathan frowned with slight annoyance. “Patrick, this is my twentieth pregnancy. I’m not useless. I can manage.”
Patrick sighed and nodded solemnly. “I know, babe, I know. I just worry. What if something happens and we’re not here?”
Jonathan’s eyes softened a little. “The cameramen will be here. It’s only two hours before Nolan gets home, Pat.”
Patrick placed a gentle, lingering kiss to Jonathan’s lips, before bumping their noses. Jonny’s nose scrunched up and Patrick cooed.
The older boy blushed, “Shut up.”
The night continued, and the two men watched as the littler kids danced around to the music, dragging the bigger kids with them.
__________________
“So this is the first birth that viewers will actually get to see- with discretion, of course. Walk us through what it's usually like.”
“Well for normal ones,” Will replied, “They last a good amount of hours. Pops never leaves. Ever.” He gave a little chuckle.
“I remember this one time,” Chrissa grinned, “It was when Nicky was born, I think. Dad was in labor for nearly twenty hours, and Pops straight up refused to leave the room. We and our grandparents would bring him clothes and food and stuff since he wouldn’t leave.”
“Some of the bigger ones, like Nolan and Luca and Will and Lance,” Keaton breathed, like a five year old would when saying so many words at once, “and sometimes Chrissy and Chris, will stay in the room while Daddy has the baby.”
“But-but Papa doesn't want us all in there,” Wes added, “So we stay outside with Grandma and Aunt Erica.”
“Sometimes Aunt Jackie and Aunt Jess too!” Hunter grinned.
“Yeah, Uncle David usually stops by after.” Mandy nodded solemnly, and she and Lance burst into laughter. Jace just sat there, confused.
“Why are the older kids in the room, and not the little ones?”
“Well for the labor, Jonny usually likes having his family close by.” Patrick shrugged, “Which, I totally understand. I need my mama during that time just as much as he needs his.” He laughed.
Jonny gave a wheeze of a laugh. “Usually the whole family is in and out of the room during the labors. But during the births, we have the small ones go outside to the waiting room with our parents and siblings. I don't want a lot of people around for that part.”
“Will’s been taking midwife courses.” Patrick explained.
“When I was old enough to see my dad have a baby, through that process, I was really upset that I couldn't help him,” Will rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, “So when I started high school, we were allowed to take extracurriculars that related to what we wanted to major in in college. I wasn’t sure what doctor I was going to be, but I wanted to work medically, and getting to help my dad was a bonus, so.”
“When I went into labor with Lacy, actually,” Jonny scratched his chin, “Patrick wasn't home. So it was just Will and the kids, and they were all in like a panic because ‘oh my god, Daddy’s dying!’ So Will and I were kind of simultaneously trying to calm down all eleven kids while trying to make sure Lacy didn't appear on the bathroom floor.”
Patrick clasped Will’s shoulder with a proud smile.
__________________
Patrick has nineteen kids. He's assisted nineteen births. So it shouldn't be so nerve wracking when Jonny goes into labor.
But it is.
The big kids were helping Jonny in the kitchen with dinner on a Sunday. They were cleaning up dishes and packaging leftovers – thank god for leftovers – when Jonny paused.
He closed the fridge door and stood there a moment, not moving much. Nolan glanced over at him and noticed his knuckles were white from gripping the fridge handle.
"You okay, Dad?” The second oldest asked.
A couple seconds later, Jonathan blinked open his eyes and nodded. “Yeah, it's probably just another one if those Braxton Hicks.”
“And if it's not?”
“Then it's not.”
And that was that.
For the next hour, nothing happened. Until that hour passed, and a sudden, sharper pain came. It startled Jonathan, the metal baking tray in his hands falling to the counter with a loud clatter.
The kids in the room – Tristan, Nolan, Mandy, Chrissa, Alexis, and Luca – jumped in surprise. They turned to their father, finding him hunched over the counter with a look of shock and discomfort.
Nolan was at his side in an instant, Mandy and Chrissa following while Luca steered Tristan out of the room.
“Go get your father, and Will.” Jonathan breathed out when the pain passed, putting his weight back to his legs as he leaned in a little into Nolan’s hold.
Mandy and Chrissa hurried out of the room. A few moments later, Will and Patrick hustled into the kitchen and over to Jonathan’s sides, Nolan moving around the counter.
Patrick took his husband’s hand. "Jonny? What's going on?”
Jonathan looked over at him. “I, uh, I think I’m in labor. My water hasn't broken yet, but I’ve gotten a couple pains that are too strong to be Braxton Hicks.”
“Are you sure?” Patrick pressed.
Jonathan gave him an unamused look. “Patrick, I've been in labor fifteen times. I think I can decipher false contractions from real ones.”
Pat nodded quickly. “Okay, okay. Um, Nolan, go find the others. Tell them that Jade’s on her way. Mandy gets the baby bag; break off into groups to grab things and call the grandparents and aunts. Will, you're gonna help me and your dad out, here.”
“Yeah, of course.” Will and Nolan agreed instantly, and Nolan ran off to spread the word. Will took a second. “Let's move you to the couch. Upstairs is a bad idea.”
They walked Jonny to the couch in the living room and got him settled. They threw a blanket over him and pushed around the pillows until he was comfortable. In the background, they could hear the kids rushing around in excitement and terror. Jonny wasn't feeling too far off.
Will disappeared back into the kitchen.
“You'll be fine, baby,” Patrick assured, kissing Jon’s forehead, “You've delivered ninteen kids. What's one more?”
“You try pushing a nine pound baby out of your body, then get back to me.” The taller man huffed out, shifting around a little on the couch.
Chrissa jogged to a halt when she entered the room, baby bag in hand. She set it on the floor by the door. “Hey Daddy. How're you doing?”
Jonathan hummed a little. “It's only the start. I haven't gotten too many contractions yet.” He subconsciously rubbed his bump. “Do you want to go tell Timothy and the other cameramen?”
Chrissa looked around. “Yeah sure. I think they're upstairs, since that's where all of us are.” She kissed his cheek and went back upstairs.
“I’m really glad we have older kids.” Jonny chuckled as Will returned with a cold bowl of water and a rag.
Patrick smiled. “I agree.”
__________________
The cameramen were recording but keeping a distance, for Jonny’s sake – which he was very grateful for.
The older kids – Will, Nolan, Lance, Luca, Mandy, Chrissa, and Chris – were all gathered in the living room with their parents.
The tweens – Peter, Jace, and Alexis – were with the little ones (PJ, Nicky, Lacy, Hunter, Wes, Keaton, Dylan, Tristan, and Mia), distracting them with cartoons and coloring in the other room.
It was around seven, and the kids – bless them – were trying to distract Jonathan from the thing that made Jonny nervous the most: anticipation.
They had on the news, and were talking about the guy who got his pants caught in one of the desks at school, when Jonathan got another contraction.
It made him jump a bit, and he hissed, tilting his hips to the side a little as he held his baby bump.
Patrick took his hand and squeezed it, shushing him. Will leapt over and crouched in front of him, dabbing the cold rag to the back of Jon’s neck.
Jonathan took deep breaths through his nose, eyes clenched shut. Shit. This was only his fourth contraction. If they were this bad already, he was in for hell at the hospital.
“Just like that. Breathe just like that, baby.” Patrick whispered.
Slowly, Jonathan relaxed again as the pain passed. “Ow.”
Patrick cooed. “When do you want to head to the hospital?”
“We’re not supposed to go until my water breaks, or contractions are seven minutes apart.” Jonathan leaned back into the cushions. “But Dr. Crosby said to come when they’re fifteen minutes apart, since I’ve, you know, had ninteen kids in the past.”
“Alright. We’ll keep timing them.” Will agreed, “Can we call Uncle Tyler?”
Jonathan nodded, “Yes. Yes please.”
Tyler was Patrick’s best friend. They met at a hockey camp back when they were teenagers and kept in touch since.
Tyler was like Jonny, able to get pregnant. He had a son, Austin, who was sixteen, a ten year old daughter named Willow, and little girl named Ava, who was four. Tyler helped Jonny significantly through his first pregnancy, and when Tyler fell pregnant the first time, he turned to Jonathan. His husband, Jamie, was very relieved for the help. Tyler was also, currently, two months pregnant.
Tyler was also a nurse, the nurse that was assigned to every birth Jonathan went through, with Dr. Crosby the same doctor every time.
Tyler arrived in the midst of another contraction. Tyler waited patiently in Jonathan’s view until the contraction passed, before walking over to the man and squatting in front of him.
“Hey you two,” Tyler smiled at the expecting parents, “You’re in labor, huh?”
Jonathan hummed, a little agitated with the contractions.
“Do you want to head over to the hospital?” Tyler asked him. “I can get Crosby to admit you.”
Patrick looked down at his husband. “It's whatever you want to do.”
Jonathan looked to Will, who shrugged. “It's up to you, Dad. You're in a comfortable environment at home, but surrounded by people with medical degrees at the hospital.”
Jonathan nodded. “Yeah, good point.” He struggled a little to sit up. “Let's go to the hospital.”
The kids packed into the cars, Will, Nolan, Lance, and Luca each driving a car. Jonathan and Patrick decided to ride with Tyler, his kids home with Jamie. Timothy and another cameraman were with them, recording.
“So, we’re heading to the hospital,” Jonathan spoke to the camera, “Baby’s decided to come a little faster than her sisters and brothers in the past.”
Tyler scoffed, “Hey now, let's point out that Mandy was your fastest birth. Remember?”
“Oh my god, how could I forget?” Jonathan grimaced. “Patrick had to deliver her on the bed.”
Patrick chuckled. “Let's just hope Jade doesn't come out in the car.”
“I think the fuck not.” Tyler gawked, and Jonny could already hear the beep the producers would put in replace of the curse word.
They arrived at the hospital a couple minutes after the kids, and they all scurried around Jonathan, almost in protection, as Patrick and Tyler helped Jonny inside the hospital.
They got him settled into a room big enough for everyone to fit inside. Tyler clocked in, deciding to pick up a shift so he could get an extra day’s pay and help Jonny.
Jonathan got dressed in the hospital gown – it was blue, and had buttons by the shoulders so he could unbutton them when he breastfed – and settled into the bed.
Tyler stuck him with an IV and started tracking the contractions. He strapped a fetal monitor on Jonathan’s stretched abdomen and did a quick ultrasound. Jade’s strong heartbeat filled the room, and Jonathan smiled, hearing his baby’s heartbeat for the last time before she was born.
A knock came from the door, and Dr. Crosby, er, Sidney – as he constantly told Jonny to call him, since he’s delivered eighteen of his kids, and now this one – entered the room, dressed in yellow scrubs. He smiled at the family.
“Hey guys,” he greeted, “Miss Jade decided to make an appearance, eh?”
Jonny huffed a little. “Yep. She’s not being quiet about it either. Sheesh.”
Sidney, Tyler, and Patrick grinned at him.
Sidney took a seat in the swivel chair and scooted over to the ultrasound machine, taking the wand from Tyler’s hand. “Well, everything seems good. Looks healthy, positioned where we need her to be.”
“She’s so well behaved, and she’s not even born yet,” Tyler joked, “C’mon, kids, you’re slacking.”
The older kids laughed, along with the little ones – though they were mainly just laughing because the others were. They had no idea what was going on.
“So we’re on the right track,” Sidney turned off the ultrasound machine, “I’m going to check you to see how far along we are, and we can go from there.”
Patrick helped situate Jonathan, propping him up on the pillows. Tyler maneuvered the blanket so it covered Jonny’s knees as Jonny pushed up and spread his legs. Sidney was quick to check him, then patted his knee for Jonny to lower his legs.
“I’d say you’re about a four, maybe three and a half.” Sidney told him, “I want to wait a couple of hours, see if your water breaks. If not, we’ll go ahead and break it so we can get a move on.”
Jonathan nodded and smiled gratefully at Sidney. “Thank you.”
“Of course, Jonathan.” Sidney smiled back, “If you need anything, you’ve got the red button to call me, and Tyler.” He left, then, leaving the family with Tyler.
There was small talk, here and there, and about fifteen minutes until Jonathan’s next contraction. They were aware of it coming, since they were tracking each one. Jonathan tensed, and Patrick laced their fingers together.
“Breathe, Jonny,” Tyler coached, Will coming to sit on the other side of his father, “In and out.”
Jonathan groaned, hips lifting up a little to try and alleviate the pain. He copied Tyler’s breathing, focusing mainly on the thumb rubbing over the top of his hand and the fingers running through his hair – hair that was dampening at the tips.
This was going to be a really long night.
_________________
Jonathan’s water broke at midnight.
They’d moved him to a big blue yoga ball, letting him bounce a little and wiggle around, trying to get the labor to progress. Patrick was behind him, holding his hands.
Nolan bit his lip and whispered to Will, “Isn’t sitting on balls what got him into this?”
“I heard that!” Jonathan shouted across the room.
Both kids burst into laughter.
Chrissa, Chris, Peter, Jace, Alexis, PJ, Nicky, Lacy, Hunter, Wes, Keaton, Dylan, Tristan, and Mia were all asleep, scattered around the room. The little ones had been up past their bedtimes and passed put around ten p.m. Chris and Chrissa were being anchored down by Mia in Chris’s lap, Lacy clutching one of his arms, and Nicky clutching Chrissa’s.
The triplets were laid one on top of the other. PJ and Alexis were cuddled against each other on the floor, Jace was laying on Peter’s shoulder, Tristan’s head on Peter’s legs, and poor little Dylan was all alone. Lance scooped him up and rested hm in his lap, letting his little brother nestle into him.
“Okay, here comes another contraction.” Tyler announced, noticing the contraction tracker.
Jonathan braced himself as his abdomen tightened, sharp, shooting pains running up and down through his body. He groaned, tilting his head back to lean against Patrick’s chest. “Oh God.”
There was an immense amount of pressure, and suddenly, there was amniotic fluid and Jonny’s water all over the floor.
He muttered a breathy, “Shit,” before crying out at the sudden, harsher contraction.
The cameramen backed into the opposite wall so Jonny could have some privacy.
Tyler pressed the red button by the bed and helped Patrick carry Jonathan back to the bed when the contraction ended. Will, Nolan, Luca, and Mandy were quick to aid them, getting cold rags and helping make Jonathan comfortable.
Sidney walked into the room a little quicker than before and took notice of the floor. “Water broke?”
Jonathan was busy trying not to curse, so Patrick answered, “Yeah. He was on the yoga ball.”
“Good. That means she’s slid down more, which should mean you’ve gone up in dilation.” Crosby remarked, slipping on some gloves.
Tyler hurried to get a mop while Sidney checked Jonathan again. “Six. Your contractions should get closer. The way you’re progressing, I expect she gets here in the next five to seven hours or so.”
Jonathan groaned. “Seven hours?”
“At the most.” Sidney smiled sympathetically.
The minutes ticked by, then the hour, then more minutes, and another hour. The cameraman decided to try and get some shots of the family again.
Jonathan was propped up against the pillows, knees bent a bit, while he rubbed his bump, trying to calm himself down because a contraction just ended.
“So, it’s around two thirty in the morning,” Patrick told the camera from his spot beside Jonny’s bed, speaking quietly so he didn’t wake the kids that were all fast asleep now, “His contractions are getting closer – I think they’re about ten minutes apart – ‘n more painful.”
“Last I checked, he was around seven,” Tyler spoke to a different camera from the other side of the room, “He’s progressing pretty well. I think we’ll have a baby within a few hours.”
Time passed and Tyler or Sidney would check him each hour. His dilation varied: seven, seven and a half, eight, eight, eight and a half, nine.
Jamie stopped by at six thirty to take the younger kids – the ones in elementary school – to school. He took Mia, too, promising to keep her at the house with his and Tyler’s kids (since she was too young for school yet).
Patrick had told the middle schoolers, “If you want to stay, you can, or you can go to school. It’s up to you.”
Alexis was completely down for staying out of school, but Jace had a test, and Peter wanted to see his girlfriend. So Jamie took the boys and Alexis stayed.
It was nearly seven in the morning when Tyler checked him again and confirmed that Jonathan was finally, finally, at ten centimeters.
The kids that had stayed were on their feet at the announcement, waking up the others in excitement. As Tyler got Jonathan ready to be moved to the delivery room, Jonathan grabbed Patrick’s hand.
“I’ve had ninteen kids, and this part still makes me nervous.”
Patrick looked down at him and kissed his forehead soothingly. “It’s alright, sweetheart. You’re gonna be fine.”
Some of the older kids – Will, Nolan, Lance, and Luca mainly – would be in the delivery room with their parents if they were allowed to. So, the four boys went with their dads while Mandy, Chrissa, Chris, and Alexis stayed back in the normal room.
Will, Nolan, Lance, and Luca took their seats in the chairs against the wall. Tyler and Sidney rolled Jonathan into the delivery room and set him up, prepping. Patrick stood by the side of the bed, one hand resting on Jonny’s knee, the other on his shoulder. His sweatpants hung loosely from his hips, t-shirt wrinkled and ball cap backwards.
“Are you ready, Jonathan?” Sidney asked, sliding on a pair of latex gloves.
Jonathan exhaled shakily. “I guess.”
“You’ll be fine. We’re gonna take care of you and Miss Jade.” Sidney assured.
Tyler did a quick, final check of his vitals, before situating the blankets. He covered Jonathan’s abdomen, then put two towels across his chest and the blanket, so that the baby could rest there. He moved a light closer to where the baby would come out to Sidney could see better. He glanced up at Patrick, “Lift his leg.”
Patrick wrapped a hand around the back of Jonathan’s knee, lifting and bending his husband’s leg. Tyler did the same to Jonathan’s other leg as Sidney slid to the end of the bed between his legs on the rolling stool.
Jonathan tensed and released a heady groan as another contraction rolled by.
“Don’t push, just breath.” Sidney told him, doing a quick checkup to make sure Jonathan was ready.
Three minutes passed before the next contraction, and when it came, Sidney gave him the green light, “Push on this one, okay? Ready…go.”
Jonathan bore down, eyes squeezing shut. Patrick and Tyler pushed Jonathan’s legs up more ever so slightly, and Patrick put his hand on the back of Jon’s head to help press his chin to his chest.
Sidney counted to ten, and Jonathan released. He took a gulp for air, dropping his head back onto the pillows. “Oh.”
Patrick ran his hands through Jonny’s hair. Sidney let him rest for a couple seconds, before saying, “Again.”
Jonathan curled into himself, pushing as hard as he could. Tyler dug his thumb into the meat of Jonny’s thigh, giving him that dull pain to focus on that Jonathan always appreciated.
Within the next three pushes, Sidney announced that he could see the very top of Jade’s head. He used a finger to pull on the rim of Jonathan’s opening so the baby had more room to come out of.
Jonathan was breathing heavily. He squeezed Patrick and Tyler’s hands tighter, leaning into Patrick’s other hand that was playing with his hair.
“Push again.” Sidney told him.
Jonathan whined and rolled his head across the pillow, lifting it up as he bore down again.
“Three...four...five...six. Good boy, good boy.” Sidney counted, “Nine, ten.”
Jonathan felt a little part of her head come out, but then slide back in. He groaned. “No please baby, no.”
“Try pushing a little harder, for a little longer. We’re going to go to thirteen.” Tyler suggested.
Sidney nodded, “Ready? Go.”
It took five thirteen-second pushes for Jonny to get Jade far enough to where her head was just a little ways out of him, but to not slide back in.
Jonathan released, shifting around uncomfortably. “Oh shit, she's right there.”
“She's about to crown.” Sidney announced. “Normal pushes this time.”
Jonathan took a couple seconds to catch his breath before pushing again. His leg twitched, the one in Patrick’s arm, and even through the pain and agony, he always felt a little sheepish having his legs spread like this.
The thought was quickly diminished when her head began to crown. Sidney told him to stop and he yelled, eyes flying wide open in pain.
“You're okay, Jonny, you're okay.” Patrick cooed, pressing his face to the side of Jonathan’s head. “I'm right here.”
“I want you to pant on this contraction, okay?” Sidney told him. “Her head is almost out.”
He ducked down again and Jonathan felt the next roll of the contraction approach. He breathed in and out, not really with a rhythm, fast and slow and deep and shallow. Patrick was worried he'd pass out.
“Small push, Jonathan, small push.” Tyler ordered. Jonathan did so and felt the head pop free and he cried out, he couldn't help it.
“Good, good, you're doing great.” Sidney smiled at him, “Shoulders next.” He pressed his hands against Jonathan’s ass cheeks, spreading, but also pushing into the muscle of his ass.
“When you’re pushing, I want you to push against my hands. Focus pushing there.” Sidney suggested, nodding at him to push.
Jonathan did as he was told and the burning came back twice as strong. He clamped his hands down on Pat’s and Tyler’s, face red and tear-stained.
“Pant!”
Jonathan released immediately, gasping and panting and struggling to stay awake. It hurt so fucking bad.
He was vaguely aware of Tyler putting an oxygen mask over his mouth. He glanced over at his friend, who gave him a smile and a reassuring nod.
He pushed and panted so many timed within the next ten minutes. Push, pant, push, push, pant, push, pant, pant, pant, push-”
"Last one, Jonathan,” Sidney announced, “Come on, you can do it.”
Jonathan shifted a little, realizing that this would be the last time that he'd ever do this, ever be pregnant or give birth. This was it.
He had half a mind to tell Sidney to shove the baby back into him, but he knew it wouldn't do any good.
So he pushed for the final time, as hard as he could, with as much force as he could muster.
He felt Jade’s torso slide out, followed by her legs, and suddenly, she was out. Jonathan collapsed onto the mattress, breathing hard into the oxygen mask.
Everything stopped for three seconds, until he heard the tell-tale shrieks that his daughter was breathing.
Sidney grinned at Jonathan and, after sucking the rest of the gunk out of her face, he set Jade on the towels on his torso.
She was a wiggly, red baby, so so small, especially compared to Jace, who was nearly ten pounds.
She was screaming, and he could hear his oldest boys cheering over by the wall. Jonathan wrapped his arms around Jade, cradling her as he cooed down at his newborn daughter.
“Oh my God,” Patrick breathed next to him, “Jonathan I'm so proud of you.” Jonny looked up at his husband and, they exchanged gentle kisses.
“Wanna cut the cord?” Sidney asked Patrick, who nodded with a grin. Sidney showed him where to cut, clapping him on the back afterwards.
Sidney then worked to get the afterbirth out, and when that was done, Tyler took Jade to get checked and weighed and all that fun stuff while Sidney made sure Jonathan wasn't going to go into shock.
“Hey, Jonathan?” Sidney mumbled, smiling at the dozing man, “You're all good. You can sleep now.”
Jonathan was out in seconds.
__________________
When he finally came to, the first thing he noticed was how quiet it was.
When you had nineteen kids, that was a problem.
He blinked his eyes open blearily, taking a look around. The kids were spread around the room, all whispering or on their devices. Patrick was asleep by his bedside in the reclining chair and, oh, that's why everyone was quiet – Jade was asleep, too, wrapped up in a white blanket, on his chest.
Will was the first to notice Jonathan had woken up. He got the attention of the kids who all crowded around the bed.
“Hey, Dad,” Nolan whispered, “How're you feeling?”
“Sore.” Jonathan chuckled lightly. “But okay.”
“Jade’s all good,” Will told him, “Seven pounds, what was it- eight ounces?”
Luca nodded.
“Yeah, and twenty inches long.” Will grinned.
Jonathan turned to Jace and pinched his chin, “Unlike you, big guy. You were a chubby thing.”
“I remember that.” Mandy teased her little brother, “Nine pounds, six ounces, twenty-two inches long. Dad was in agony.”
“Thank God for epidurals.” Jonathan joked.
Jace grinned as a couple of his siblings pushed him around.
Patrick finally woke up, and he smiled down at his husband when he saw Jonny was awake. “Hey you. How're you doing?”
“Good. Kinda achy, kinda nauseous, but otherwise okay.” Jonathan told him. “Jade?”
“Absolutely perfect.” Patrick grinned, transferring Jade into his arms.
“Hi sweet girl,” Jonny cooed as Jade swung her little fist around, “Look at you. Oh my God.”
Jade relaxed again when she recognized Jonathan’s voice. She let out a little sigh and fell back to sleep.
“Tyler said that she needed to be breastfed when you woke up.” Patrick told him.
The older kids were quick to give them space, backing up by the door and swinging the curtain in the room to separate them.
Will and Nolan, however, stayed.
They'd had all their sons who’d started puberty tested to see if they were able to he pregnant. No one was, actually, except Nolan.
Which was good, actually, because Nolan had come out as very much gay when he was fifteen.
Will was studying to be an OB/GYN in college, and Pat and Jonny figured it would be good for them to learn hands-on how to take care of a baby and a post-birth parent.
The three of then helped Jade latch onto Jonny’s nipple. It took a few tries, but she got it eventually. They talked amongst one another quietly, until Jonny had to transfer Jade to the other nipple.
When she was done, Nolan burped her, and decided to hold her for a little while longer. They brought the rest of the kids back in a couple minutes later.
“Daddy, can I hold her?” Peter asked.
“Hey, I wanted to hold her.” Chris glared playfully.
“No! Me!” PJ huffed.
“Um, I'm the oldest girl. I'm gonna be holding her first.” Mandy scoffed.
“You wanna bet, Princess?” Will challenged.
The kids burst into arguments, and Jonathan looked to Patrick in amusement. “Twenty kids. What are we going to do?”
“Condoms. That's what we’re going to do.”
“Patrick!”