Chapter Text
“On your right!”
“Gah!”
“No, your other right!”
“Real helpful Dickhead,” Jason remarked, dodging another hit from his 3 o’ clock. He and Dick were sent off to do some recon on some CADMUS experiment on cloning (go figure) but ended up in a … less than optimal situation. It’s always gotta be something, Jay thought.
"OK. I think we lost them for now. Let's go to the sub-basement before they come back," Dick said, looking back and forth just to make sure. Jason nodded and put one of his guns back, keeping the other on hand. They made their way down in proper Batclan fashion to The Room.
"Fuck, that's bright," Dick said as he opened the door to The Room. Jason's helmet began filtering the excess light. Now able to see, he found the source: a giant, seemingly fluid mass in a giant containment pod. Then he felt a chill going down his neck. Dick began coughing and quickly dug out his rebreather from his belt. A sparkling ray seemed to emit from the pod and heavy warmth washed over the two. Jason quickly put a usb into one if the computers and the virus program made short work of CADMUS's systems.
"I got the specs," Jason called out, pulling out the USB and went to drag Dick out of The Room. Dick seemed to be in a trance after staring at the pod but snapped out of it as soon as Jason tugged on his arm.
The two made their way out with relatively no struggle. Well, there was that Tyler guy which goon 3 (who was obviously an anime fan) began yelling at, saying something about 'respecting his senpai' or something like that. Jason and Dick stopped and stared at them a little incredulously before shaking their heads and finally leaving.
~~~~~
"Here," Jason tossed the usb at Tim who caught it in one hand and took a sip from the mug that was in his other hand. Jason turned on his heel and began to take a step toward his bike but a stern voice made him freeze.
"Don't forget it's family dinner night Master Jason. You weren't about to retire to your safe house in the Narrows beforehand were you?" Alfred was right behind him. Jason nearly flinched from the older man's close proximity.
"O-oh. Um-I, er…" Jason hopelessly failed to get anything coherent out. Alfred's presence seemed to grow and get heavier on him.
"Of course not!" he finally managed.
"I'd better see you upstairs then. And the rest of you as well," Alfred shifted his gaze to Tim and Dick, who were just like deer in the headlights. Then he disappeared up the stairs. When everyone in the cave thought Alfred was up, his voice echoed almost eerily throughout the cave, “and you and Dick mustn't forget to scan yourselves for any abnormalities. We wouldn’t want any of you to become ill from your...endeavors.” The door opened then closed.
A moment later there was crunching. Everyone turned to Dick. Dick didn’t even blink and kept shoveling his face with more cereal.
~~~~~
The next day when Bruce woke up there was screaming.
Or perhaps a better term would be squealing? The voice couldn’t have come from someone older than Damian from the pitch, but Damian wouldn’t resign himself to such ‘inappropriate behaviors.’ He grabbed his robe and made his way downstairs, following the high pitched voice.
A black haired boy was running through the halls wearing what seemed to be Jason’s hand-me-downs. In the corner of his vision he could also see another boy in more formal clothing, hiding behind a corner with a sharp glare on his face. Bruce could already feel a headache coming on. Ignoring the pretty-normal-to-vigilantes-but-wtf-to-normal-people situation, he walked straight to the Keurig, popped in a K-cup and filled his mug with deliciously artificially-flavored hot bean juice. He took a long sip which turned into chugging the whole cup down then made another cup and downed that just as fast. The boy in Jason’s clothes suddenly ran up to Bruce and nearly headbutted him with how clumsily he stopped.
“Oh my goodness Bruce! I still can’t believe you let me stay here with you! I mean Batman was the one who dropped me off here but still!!!” Oh dear God he knew this child. Looking into the boy’s eyes he knew.
Jason.
Damn it. And Dick was with him yesterday so the other boy in the shadows must have been him.
Just.
Great.
~~~~~
Bruce gave the situation the benefit of the doubt: aka he’d call someone with mystical expertise if he couldn’t solve the problem within a week. Tim and Damian were still in Europe so Bruce would have to keep it together for a few days.
Of course its not as easy as it sounds, and it only goes downhill from there. By the tapping in the ceiling, Dick was most likely in the ventilation and Jason moved on to seeing how fast he could slide down the railing of the staircase. He could leave Dick up there for probably another hour before he got hungry so he took his chances with Jason.
"Jason, how about you go help prepare lunch with Alfred?" Bruce asked as he caught the boy before he smashed his face into the sculpture bust by the bottom of the stairs. Jason's smile was so blinding Bruce could hear angels. Oh goodness this dear child is too pure for this world!
"Oooo! Maybe we can make breakfast sandwiches! The ones with the runny eggs and everything bagels and bacon and--" the boy's voice eventually died off as he marched over to the kitchen. Then Bruce went back up the stairs to find Dick...hopefully without getting the silent treatment.
Bruce didn’t think he’d have to go through this again. Dick had already gone through so much at that age. The agony of losing his parents right in front of him coupled with his acrobatic prowess made for a dangerous combination. Dick could easily have turned into his grandfather’s puppet. A slave to his grandfather’s legacy as a talon just so he could finally kill off his pain. Then some days he would act so uncharacteristically calm as if nothing had happened and the next he was nowhere to be found, a vicious cycle that only stopped after Bruce gave him something to focus all of his feelings into. Although he supposed vigilantism was probably not the best way to go...
That’s right, Bruce finally remembered. His favorite spot was the corner space leftmost of the attic. Dick would hide his stuffed elephant there to protect it and hide himself behind boxes of Bruce’s childhood niceties as well. Bruce walked into the attic with slight caution in his step as if approaching an injured animal.
“I know you’re there Mr. Wayne,” a small voice said from the left of the attic. Dick came out from his place in the corner with his elephant in his arms. His eyes narrowed.
“Alfred is making breakfast for lunch,” offered Bruce. Damn it, that wasn’t what he wanted to say. How pathetic.
“Who is that other boy? I thought you didn’t have any other relatives,” Dick turned his head and raised his hand to his chin in thought. “Unless,” he dropped his hand and looked at Bruce right in the eyes, “that’s just another one of your lies.”
Ok fuck. This was REALLY not going well. Fuuuuuuuuuck---and any other curse words he could think of...
“So?” GODDAMN-he wiped the dumb look off his face and gave his least shitty answer he could think of while under emotional stress.
“I adopted him the other day?” nope nope nope nope nope and nooooooo. That was probably the most honest but ultimately the worst thing he could have said; Bruce contemplated death right there. Dick on the other hand was a mix of different emotions all threatening to bubble over.
“Fine. Breakfast sounds great for lunch,” Dick settled for defeat as he made his way back down to the dining room.
shit.