Work Text:
Roger stood in front of the mirror, frowning as he turned from left to right, observing himself from each angle. Ever since that god-awful tabloid, had printed a picture, taken from a rather unflattering angle and splashed a red headline over it, titled, “Queen Drummer, packing on the pounds” , he had become obsessed with staring at his reflection, and picking himself apart.
He sighed and pinched at the flab that had become a part of his midsection. Now, it wasn’t like he’d put on a lot of weight, the small bit of fat wasn’t even really visible. But to Roger, it seemed like he had gigantic belly. His shoulders slumped, ever since they’d stopped touring, he’d allowed himself to slip into a relaxed state. Touring had always kept them fit and trim, they’d lose some weight, gain some muscle. But ever since the Magic Tour had gotten over, and Queen had taken a small hiatus to recharge their batteries, John and he had been spoiling each other. Be it with gifts, snacks, massages or even new records. John, his heart sank. Would John ever find him attractive now that he had this unattractive section of fat on his body? John was so young, he had just hit his late thirties, whereas Roger was almost forty.
He felt tears begin to prick at his eyes as he felt the panic begin to set in. It was rare for him to panic in such a manner, but the thought of losing John would do that to him. He knew, he knew with a certainty that John was the love of his life, and the one he wanted to grow old, well older with. If he hadn’t felt so panicked, the more steady part of his brain (which sneakily sounded like Brian), would have told him that he was being silly and John would never leave him.
“Fuck you”, he hissed at the mirror, “You’re unappealing”
“Roger?”, his eyes snapped up to meet green-grey eyes in the mirror, that were filled with concern and sadness as they gazed at him. It was John. “Roger?”, John repeated when the blond refused to meet his eyes. “Love, why did you say that?” Roger turned around, “Because it’s true”, he sniffled, “I’m unappealing."
“Says who?”, John folded his arms as he frowned. “The tabloids”
“Fuck them”, John scowled, he really hated tabloids. What with their incessant chasing after of Brian and Freddie recently. Brian and Chrissie had just formally separated, and it wasn’t a secret that he’d been seeing Anita. But it wasn’t the press’s bloody business to stick their noses where they didn’t belong. And as for them hounding Freddie who was supposedly ‘fatally ill’. It just wasn’t fair. And now they were targeting his poor Roger. “But they’re not wrong, Deaky”, Roger sighed, “Look at me”
“I am”, John said softly, “And I just see you, wonderful, handsome and”, his expression turned sly, “Sexy.” A small smile began to tug at Roger’s lips, “But my stomach”, his voice was trembling. “Roger”, John’s voice was firm, “Everyone has a bit of fat on their stomach, you do have organs after all, shouldn’t you know this? You’re the one who did biology”
“But I’m fat”, Roger pressed on. “No you’re not”
“I am”, he insisted, “And you’ll realize it soon enough and leave me”, Roger said sadly, looking down at his feet.
John walked over to where Roger stood and wrapped his boyfriend in a warm hug. “I will never ever leave you”, he whispered into his ear. “Never, I love you”. Roger had begun to cry, John could feel them falling onto his shirt. “You promise?”, he sniffled. “Promise, why would I want anyone else when I already have you?”
“I’m sorry”, Roger said in a small voice. “Don’t be”, John pulled away from him and wiped the tears that had escaped. “I love you”
“I love you too,” John grinned at him, “Would you like me to show you how much?” Roger chuckled, “I’d like that”
***