Work Text:
Text messages between Sarah Wilson and Sam Wilson
Sarah
Saturday 1:10 PM
Sarah: how are you feeling?
Sam: better
Sam: I took a long flight to clear my head yesterday
Sam: unwrapped some stuff with my therapist today
Sam: talked to bucky about nat
Sarah: in general, or did you mention that you two were involved?
Sam: oh, he already knew that
Sam: we saw him a few times while it was going on
Sarah: I don't think I realized that
Sam: yeah, I actually talked to him one night a little after we'd ended it
Sam: we happened to be in wakanda and I couldn't sleep
Sarah: you definitely didn't tell me that
Sam: I'm not sure I've ever told anyone that
Sam: it's not a secret, just never came up
Sam: anyway. he actually did seem to get how I felt, which was good
Sam: both in terms of feeling like somebody got it and relaxing a little about whether he'd interpret that in a way I didn't want him to
Sarah: good
Sam: I do think that some of my issues with bucky were based in anxiety about how close we were getting when I was still worried about losing anyone I got close to
Sarah: that seemed like it was probably what was going on
Sarah: you feeling any better about it?
Sam: yeah, I am
Sam: at least with him. I think it's a work in progress with just about everyone else, but it's something
Sarah: it is
Sarah: and it's okay to only fully trust a few people - it's just not a good thing when you can't trust anyone but me, including the partner you've spent most of the past month and a half sharing a bed with
Sarah: I don't fully trust a lot of people, either
Sam: you're not wrong
Sarah: where are you with any of your old friends from the avengers?
Sam: well, that's a loaded question
Sam: rhodes is great, but I'm not sure I'm ever going to completely get past the sokovia accords
Sam: we've talked about it, I understand where he was coming from, he pointed out that he wasn’t really in a position to rethink it after that injury but said that he does regret how it was handled and some of the things that got said when we argued about it
Sarah: sounds like there’s a “but still” there
Sam: yeah. but still.
Sam: I believe him, but I don't think that the way he thinks about things has really changed. so I care about him, and there are a lot of things I'd trust him about, but it's just... complicated.
Sarah: that's fair.
Sarah: at some point I should probably apologize for telling him to go to hell when he reached out after the blip happened
Sam: I don't think he's holding a grudge
Sarah: I'm sure he's not, I just didn't handle it well
Sarah: I wasn't interested in talking to anyone who I could blame for not getting that last two years with you
Sam: and now you're here wondering why you missed me in the first place and think you overreacted?
Sarah: exactly
Sam: I get it, though. I don't know if I'm ever going to fully forgive clint, even though that's probably not really fair
Sam: anyway, I run down the list and it's complicated with just about everyone who's left
Sarah: I can understand that.
Sarah: I do find it funny that it's the least complicated with the one guy who actually tried to kill you, though
Sam: you’re not wrong