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It starts on a muddy day in March, with a chill that just won’t leave. A breeze that hugs his body too tight and begins to squeeze. On the way back from his mailbox, he can’t move his feet. His boots squelch sickeningly, sinking into the mud. Static fills the space between his ears, a squirrel chattering across the street is amplified to a grinding screech.
His feet move of his own accord, stumbling, clumsily. His heart skips a beat, as if a excited. The control is complete, he can’t move his lips, not that it matters he can’t-
“Hello, Joseph Wilson.”
It comes from inside of him, there’s no one around, it’s impossible he can’t-
“Be quiet.”
He falls into a familiar darkness, a hell he’s been to before.
“Donna, Joe’s not picking up my calls.”
They have reservations for lunch in an hour, he’s texted him five times and he hasn’t responded to any of them, or his calls.
“He’s probably in the shower. Calling him over and over isn’t going to change that. He’ll text you when he’s done.”
Dick groans, flopping over on her bed. She doesn’t turn away from her mirror, carefully inserting her earrings. She does a little twirl and her knee length skirt flows, rising up a little, but not too much and smiles, pleased with her own appearance.
“Do you think this clashes with my shirt?”
He’s already gone back to readying another message to Joey. It’s just not like him not to respond. He doesn’t bother looking up.
“You look fine.”
“You guys are all the same, ‘you look fine, Donna’, ‘don’t worry about it Donna’, ‘you look fine, blah, blah, blah’, would it kill you to give an answer longer than four words?”
Joey misses another one of his calls. Donna flicks him square in the forehead.
“Are you even paying attention?”
“You look fine, Donna.”
There’s a gun his mother gave him, it’s unlike those preferred by his fathers.
“It’s more discreet. No one will even know you’re carrying it. Perfect for self defense… or an assassination attempt…”
She laughed.
“Don’t look at me like that, I’m only joking. Be proud to carry it, this was passed on to me from my father, it’s protected me, and now it’ll protect you.”
He never needed it. Never needed any of the guns, they’d only slow him down, there’s a million other methods he could use.
But the thing keeps staring at the gun. His hand twitching out. He twitches his hand back. The control weakens the closer it gets.
“How long will we play this game?”
His phone rings. It licks his lips. He recognizes the tone, and it knows. It goes to silent.
“We need to be ready to greet your friend.”
The phone rings again as his face curls into an unnerving smile. The hand darts for the gun, this time he can’t stop it. Thank gods it isn’t loaded.
“That can be fixed.”
White hot pain shoots through his brain, his head is coming apart, he’s going to die, he’s going to-
A memory plays out, he watches himself put the bullets away in the bottom shelf, keying in the lock combination. Fuck.
“Fuck, indeed, human.”
It laughs from inside him.
Donna leaves for her lunch date with the girls, and Dick contemplates what to do. Joeys missed seven calls, granted they’re all within ten minutes of each other, so Donna could be right, he’s in the shower. But still, it’s not like Joey to leave him high and dry like this.
He paces relentlessly through the Tower, climbing up and down the spiral staircase. If Joe were in trouble, he should go, but he should also take someone with him, but Joe would signal if he was in trouble, so Donna is probably right. Unless he couldn’t signal them, he could be trapped, or hurt, or dead and he’s doing nothing about it. Gods, he’s a horrible boyfriend-
His phone buzzes.
“Sorry for missing the calls, car troubles. Could you pick me up?”
Sweet relief washes over him and he offers up a prayer to each of the gods he’s met.
“No problem.”
He responds lightning fast, only considering after he presses the send button that Joey’ll think he’s a weirdo. Scratch that, Joey already thinks he’s a weirdo, living in a giant T takes away your street cred pretty quickly. It’s only their second date, he wants this to go well though. Maybe Donna was right, taking him aside before she left.
“Joey’s understanding, he knows who you are and loves you for you. Quit overthinking it, just go have fun.”
She’s right like most of the time. Joe’s also like *this* close to moving into the giant T, which helps too.
It takes all his strength to stop the thing from getting more bullets in the gun. One slips past. Maybe another, the thing closes his eyes, blinding him, but he still fights for control.
It’s strange, he feels so far away from all of this. As if he’s standing up with the clouds tugging for control like a puppeteer while also being the marionette. He can’t feel worried, or angry. He’d like to give up, he’d like to sleep, he’s comfortable here, the hell of before was a mere glimpse, he feels safe.
But he also can’t let the thing load more bullets in the gun. It’s like swimming through thick water.
“Like blood?”
It suggests.
He redoubles his efforts.
The trees are almost in bloom and the sun is high in the sky, hardly a cloud in sight. They’ve had a bunch of rain recently, but things are drying out nicely. The radios barely played any ads, and he hums along to Prince’s new album. The roads are clear, he bops his head as he drives along, and finds himself having a genuinely good time.
He was worried earlier, but it’s slowly and surely melting away, turning to excitement instead. He should ask Joey if he’d like to walk through the botanical gardens after lunch. There’s not a ton to see yet, but it would be nice to get outside. Or they could see a movie. There’s nothing going on today until their meeting, they could probably hang out a bit longer.
Things have been winding down recently and maybe it’s foolish to tempt fate, but fuck it, he’s in love and the world is on his side, it’s a beautiful day, he has beautiful friends and a beautiful lover and for the first time in a while, he smiles in spite of himself.
They stand, together, staring at the door, gun loosely swaying at their side. He wonders if this is how his victims feel, powerless to stop an avalanche in motion. Logically he knows something horrible is about to happen, but it feels so far beyond it. Maybe this is how Kory feels, soaring above the world.
Like Icarus, he strays too close to the sun.
It’s not his wings that are burning.
There’s a knock on the door.
It raises his hand, slowly and steadily, his efforts to slow the process dull and unfocused.
His left hand twitches, responding to his thoughts, in a last ditch effort, he tries to punch the gun away.
He simply spins the barrel.
“Joey? You there?”
It’s not like him to leave him waiting at the door. A bit of worry creeps into his gut, but he doesn’t his smile falter.
*click*
Nothing happens.
“Insignificant mortal whelp.”
Was that a voice behind the door? It’s definitely not weird to press your head against your boyfriend’s door to try and hear what’s going on. But someone could be in there and in their lives, that could mean anything.
“I’m coming in.”
It’s probably just the radio. He’s overreacting, but he wants to be sure.
The door handle turns.
*click*
He struggles for control, wills the hand to stay still, wills Dick to leave goddamnit-
Maybe he should be more cautious about it, there could be someone in there. It’s too late now.
“Joe-”
Dick recoils as the door flings open, Joey tries with all his might to keep his fingers straight, it pushes back. Cool metal connects as Dick flinches away, he can’t-
“-why-”
He flings his arm as hard as he can, but it barely moves and inch.
*BANG*
It laughs, he prays.
“So anyways”
Donna flashes a radiant smile, tearing a bit of bread and popping it into her mouth. She’s lovely, sitting in front of an evergreen tree. It’s a timeless picture, her hair lolling over her shoulders, lips smacking together as she talks, cherry lipstick not leaving a smudge.
“You should come to the rink with us sometime, you’d love it.”
Koriand’r hums, raising an eyebrow. Her nose scrunches up in the cutest way, Gar showed her a cat picture once that looks exactly like her expression. She can see her eyes smile behind her reflective glasses.
“I don’t think Raven would enjoy Roller Derby.”
Koriand’r laughs a little, leaning back in her chair, popping the front legs off the ground. Raven finds herself smiling, laughing a little, even. Donna throws a piece of bread at Koriand’r, and she catches it in her mouth.
“Careful.”
Raven warns. She wouldn’t want to make a mess.
“Eh, if it falls the squirrels will get it.”
She nods understandingly, they are outside, after all.
“You told me not to feed the squirrels.”
Koriand’r pouts. Donna shrugs. Koriand’r takes a turn, throwing a bit of bread back at her and she catches it in her mouth.
“I meant like, you shouldn’t do it on purpose.”
Raven’s just glad no one’s here to watch, the beauty of eating at odd hours is being able to get a table alone. Donna brought them to a cute place with lots of vegetarian and vegan options. Iced tea comes in towering cups, there’s real flowers on the tables, and they sit surrounded by a gorgeous garden. The sun lazily shines in the sky, thawing out whatever was left of winter.
They had a rough time last week, but today, everything seems to have passed over them. She finds herself smiling in spite of herself.
A then deep burning pain claws at her insides.
She should have known something this wonderful couldn’t last. The others knock over their chairs standing up so fast.
“I need to go.”
“Where?”
There’s no time to explain, she grabs their arms and pulls them into the space between dimensions.
There’s blood spattered on his mother’s carpet. He has the faintest inkling that she won’t be pleased. It takes a step forward as Dick crawls away. He should be more concerned about that.
“…please…”
Everything seems so far away. Something awful is about to happen. Or maybe it already did.
“…Joey…”
It aims the gun. Or did he? He’s losing his grip on something and he thinks it might be important.
“…sorry…don’t…”
He needs to stop it, needs to do something. Blood is pooling on the floor, and he can’t bring himself to care, doesn’t remember where it came from, can’t bring himself to panic, it’s all he can do to resist the tightening of the trigger finger, and shift the hand a few millimeters.
*click*
He really hopes there aren’t any more bullets in the gun.
“…Joe…love…”
Darkness swirls and shadows encase him, he tries to hold on, inch forward, do something, but his insides scream and he’s losing too much blood. Adrenaline courses through his veins and still, he wills himself forward, pushing with his legs, trying to hold himself together with his hands.
He can’t die here. Not in front of him. Not like this.
His ears ring but the sound of laughter cuts through. They’re not alone.
I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you.
She hates dimension travelling with Raven, it leaves her dazed and unfocused, the dark is a shock to those that revel in the light. Someone’s laughing as they emerge, and Raven disappears from her side. Metal flashes in the light- a gun-
*BANG*
*crack*
She fires off a starbolt, watching the smoking gun clatter to the ground. Her hands smolder as she burns with rage, and she turns to the man’s face-
“Joey?!?”
Nothing seems to make sense.
“Gods… Hera help us…”
Donna mutters, positioned between-
“X’hal! Dick! NO!”
She’s pretty sure humans shouldn’t loose that much blood.
Joey thanks all the gods as Donna steps in front of the bullet, deflecting the shot. Kory’s screams drown out its laughter. He drops the strings from his hands, letting go, it can have control now. They’ll fix things. Everything is fine when everyone’s together.
Raven cries out in agony. It winces. It’s afraid. It steps back.
“Careful. Somethings probably controlling him.”
Donna cautions, protectively backing into position in front of Dick and Raven. Kory takes slow steps forwards. Raven’s screams send shivers up its spine.
“Get… him out…”
She pants. It turns, running towards the stairs, and suddenly he’s falling, smacking against the floor.
Raven catches her breath. She can’t do anything more for Richard, the rest is up to him. But there’s one thing left she needs to do. Koriand’r gathers Richard into her arms and Donna helps her up.
“Get out.”
The thing in Joseph’s body squirms, shaking violently as she comes closer.
“I’ll kill him if you come closer.”
Her father whispers. She’s not afraid. Not anymore. Not after her friends emerged triumphant in battle against him.
“You don’t have the power.”
What’s left of him is echoes and bits, ashes swept across the dimensions, mingling with the sands of time and space.
“You know nothing of my power.”
It hisses. Dark tendrils snake across the floor. Joseph foams at the mouth. Controlled anger bubbles in her stomach, rising through her.
“Get. Out. Of. My. FRIEND!”
Her soul soars into Josephs body, coldly enveloping her father and shredding him apart, pushing and pulling and ripping into particles smaller than dust. His screams mingle with hers; his pain is hers, and in an instant, all is quiet again, and she brings herself back together.
The ground is cool against her back. She groans, throwing an arm over her eyes. Every inch of her body radiates pain. One good day, it seems, is far too much to hope for.
Strong arms wrap around her body. Silky lips caress her cheek.
“Great job, Raven.”
Maybe today wasn’t a total waste.
When he wakes up next, he feels like utter shit, but his breath is his own and-
He can’t speak. It’s gone. Thank gods.
His memories are a mess, jumbled and spots are missing entirely. Opening his eyes, he finds himself on a couch in Titans Tower and he has no idea how he got here.
“Hey.”
Vic’s hand is cool to the touch. His face materializes before the ceiling.
“Are you okay? Raven said she thought yah’d be good now but checkin’ in won’t hurt nothin’.”
Is he okay? He doesn’t really remember- oh gods- Dick-
“Woah, slow down, bud, he’s outta surgery, he’s gonna be fine.”
Surgery?!?
“Calm yer tits, he’s fine, just breathe Joe.”
Vic helps him up, then sweeps his arms over the back of the couch, plopping his chin on Joey’s shoulder, giving him a quick hug.
“He’s just gonna hafta take it easy fer a bit. And so do you. Nothin’ you can do now.”
He grabs the remote, flipping through channels until he finds a football game, and jumps over the couch to sit down.
“Donna…”
“What?”
Nothing makes sense. His head is fuzzy, and the room is spinning. He’s pretty sure something important was happening.
“Dick, do you need the nurse?”
Does he need a nurse? He doesn’t think so.
“No?”
Wait… he was going somewhere?
“Where’s Joey?”
“He’s fine, he’s back at the Tower, Vic’s making sure there’s no lasting effects. Kory’s watching Raven. And you’re stuck with me.”
Lasting effects? That’s a thing. She said stuck.
“Hmm. Like glue.”
She laughs, too loudly, he groans and falls back asleep.
Dick’s not recovering as quickly as they hoped. He can’t help but blame himself.
“It’s really not your fault.”
Dick mutters, wincing as he holds a hand to his side. Joey passes him some ibuprofen.
“I did not-”
Dick waves a hand cutting off his signing as he dry swallows the pills. He can’t stop himself from cringing.
“You were making that face again.”
His hand tightens, betraying his now carefully neutral face. There was some internal damage, the bullet ricocheted, if he’d just thrown out that stupid gun, none of this would have happened!
“You’re still making the face. I’m fine, Joe.”
He grimaces in response.
“Liar.”
He signs, clearly that isn’t true.
“Even if I’m not one hundred precent right now, it’s not your fault, you did the best you could.”
His voice is laced with pain, each word adding to his guilt. Doing nothing is killing him.
“How can I help?”
“Don’t blame yourself.”
He crosses his arms. For now, that’s too much to ask. Dick sighs, moving his drink to hunch over the table.
“I’m sorry, I know I wouldn’t feel any different.”
He says to the placemat. Joey eyes the couch a few feet away. It looks much more comfortable. He makes up his mind. Dick eyes him wearily as he stands, and walks over, slipping an arm underneath his knees and the other behind his back. As he lifts, Dick curls into him, making the side where he was shot as small as possible.
Slowly, without much jostling, he makes his way to the couch. Carefully, he squats down, sliding Dick onto it. Dick’s fingernails dig into his back.
“Please… don’t let go.”
There’s sweat glistening on his brow. He turns, sitting with Dick instead, amazed he still wants him around. Dick scrunches up, burrowing his face into his chest, and Joey wraps his arms up to support him, raising a knee to support Dick’s back.
He taps morse code assurances lightly against him.
‘It will be okay.’
‘I am sorry.’
He hesitates.
‘I love you.’
“I love you too.”