Chapter Text
bum bum bum
Papyrus: Edd let's begin describe the day you played Berlin.
Tord disguised as Edd: We rehearsed and then we walked about, we ate bratwurst and sauerkraut.
Spy: That night at ten o' three were you inside the portrait gallery?
T: From ten o' clock til' ten o' four is when we did the show's encore.
P: hm, sir we have our doubt can you confirm our hm-whereabouts
T: my alibi is water tight, the audience saw me kazoo all night
S: Monsieur we know you did the crime.
T: I was on stage that whole time, sounds a bit crazy now that you mention
S and P: Thank you Tord no more questions
buuuuuuum bum bum
GF appears
S: oh boy an Americian.
S: Girlfriend you could be locked inside now's you're chance to save your hide
GF: Ah ha Gentlemen I did not know it's a crime to steal the show
P: Tell us how the art was taken
S: If you want to save your bacon
G: I haven't seen your missing art, all I've taken is audience hearts.
P: we can give you a plea deal
S: All you have to do is squeal
G: I'm not a theif I don't know how, all I've ever taken is a bow.
S: We'll catch the swine that did this job
G: Give up the pig puns creep, go jump in a lake that's my suggestion
S & P: Thank you girlfriend no more questions
S: Oh I love doing that
P: I don't think it's helping
S: y'know I think they did it
P: no they didn't
S: yes they did and we can pin it
P: if they did then how'd they do it
S: if they didn't how'd they didn't
P: If they didn't then it's easy then they simply didn't do it
S: if they did it then I knew it but we've nothing that can prove it- *ahem* exsuse me, bring it the hedgehog
P: do you remember what you did on the night you played Madrid
Sonic: I was hit by a raging wall, reminded me of sonic spinball.
S: Hogo whaddoya know about a sculpture theft at Madrid's Prado?
SO: I didn't see those stupid things spent the rest of the night collecting my rings
P: the truth sonic the clock is tickin
SO: if ya don't believe me ask the chicken, cucky was there he'll cooperate
S: Monsieur are you willing to cooberate?
Cucky: chicken noises
P: will somebody get this chicken out of here!
SO: calm down Cucky it's a routine inspection
Both: Thank you sonic no more questions
badabup badabup badabup doobie doo da da do
S: Let's go from the start what do you know about the stolen art
Glamrock Freddy: I didn't know there was a plan
Cuphead: You're accusation's far out man!
Tails: The chances of us committing a crime are less than point zero zero nine
BF: Beep bop bee bo bee pop boo bop bee poo ba beep boo
S: To help with our investigation can you do a full translation
Daddy Dearest: What the Boyfriend said to you is beep bo beep ba boo it ain't rapping
Moon: Incomprehensible laugher
Chica: Pizza pizza PIIIIIZZZZZZAAAAAAAA
Sans: Uh, I can do an Elvis impression
P: Thank you sans no more questions
S: They didn't
P: No they didn't
S: There's no way they did the crime
P: They couldn't they're too stupid
S: There not criminal masterminds
P: we do not know who did it but we know who didn't do it
Both: So we know who didn't do it
Spy: They are incapable of being culpable.