Chapter Text
“....You promise to stay?....”
“I promise”
Thor should have known from the very beginning that those words were nothing but empty promises and full of lies but this wasn’t the first time he had been lied to. Even though those words had been nothing but lies he still hoped for them to be true he had hoped with all his heart for them to be true. His grip on Mjölnir tightened even more, turning his knuckles white.
“Thor?” The gentle voice of Jane Foster was all he could hear in the quietness of the night in the realm of Svartálfheim where not moments ago they had been battling the dark elves. He could still hear her calling his name but he ignored her as he started walking toward the corpse.
Thor dropped to his knees, Mjölnir fell from his hands with a thud and a broken sob escaped his bloody lips when he saw no movement. This was all his fault if he hadn’t asked Loki for his help he would have still been alive. As gently as he could be he picked Loki up and pressed him against his chest. Tears rolled down his cheeks.
He felt numb, his chest felt tight, it was as if someone was squeezing his heart, his throat felt tight. He tried to swallow but he couldn’t do it with the lump forming in his throat. More tears escaped his eyes. He felt so lost that he didn’t know what to do or think. He pressed Loki closer to his chest and rocked his body back and forth. His grip on Loki armor never loosen.
Jane, who is standing behind Thor, bit her bottom lip. She didn’t know what to say or do. Tears threatened to fall when Thor let out a painful scream. A scream that will haunt her dreams. She just stood there listening to Thor talk. “…Loki please… please wake up…Loki, you promised you would stay, you lied to me.” His voice lowered into a whisper “I lost you once, I can’t lose you again.” He continued to rock their bodies back and forth, his gaze never leaving Loki's face. Crying Thor placed gentle kisses against his brother's pale cheek. His lips placed kisses on his forehead and then against his throat as though hoping that those kisses would wake him up.
He still remembers the day that Loki let go; he had thought he had lost his brother forever; he had wanted to go and look for him but his father had forbidden him from doing such a thing. He didn’t understand how Odin had been okay with Loki gone, related or not Loki was still his son.
When he had first received news that his brother was alive and doing well he did not waste time he didn’t even wait for Odin approval he immediately went to Midgard to look for his brother he wanted to see with his own eyes that Loki was still alive. He still remembers the day he saw him. He was so happy to see that his brother was alive and well.
Even though he had found his brother in a tight situation with the Midgard superheroes he still greeted him with open arms.
With all the destruction he had done to Midgard he had been imprisoned in Asgard Thor was okay with it even though he didn’t like seeing his brother in a cell he was okay with it because he knew his brother was alive and well. Oh how wrong he was.
Jane walked up to him when she noticed that it was getting really late and they no longer had time. They needed to get going. “…Thor I’m so sorry… but we need to get going…” she bit her bottom lip again when she saw Thor not moving she continued to walk up to him and kneel beside him with a shaky hand she reached out to him and she leaned her head on his board shoulder. The smell of dirt mixed with sweat and blood made it to her nostrils but she did not pay it any mind.
She could still hear Thor talking “you promised me please let this be all a trick and wake up… what will I tell mother. I promised mother I was going to protect you. What will mother think of me? She's going to think I broke that promise.” Jane swallowed the lump that was starting to form on her throat and her grip on Thor’s shoulder tightened . “Thor?” she whispered in a softer tone “I’m really sorry but we need to go.”
Thor shook his head. He didn't want to leave, he wanted to stay here with his little brother. “I - I can’t leave him here, I don't want to leave him… my little brother.” he pressed his forehead against his brother and in a small whisper he said “I can’t leave him here all alone he will be scared.” He choked back a sob “I have to take care of him, it's my duty as a brother to look out for him and to protect him. I can’t let the monster scare him. I promised him that.”
Jane felt as if someone stabbed her right through her heart when she heard how broken Thor sounded. She knew how much Thor loved his brother. She remembered the way he talked about him and the way his eyes would soften when he talked about the things they did when they were kids but they couldn’t stay here forever they needed to get moving and find a way to stop the rest of the elves.
Thor didn’t say anything as he tugged Loki under his chin, his grip on Loki armor tightened even more. He no longer cared what was going on and he no longer cared if the dark elves attacked Midgard all he cared about was to stay here with his brother.
He closed his eyes and all of a sudden a memory of when Loki and he were younger flashed through his mind like a broken mantra.
A seven year old Loki ran to Thor chamber; he was so scared that he needed his brother right away. He had a nightmare that he did not want to think about. He was so afraid that his face was stained with tears and eyes were puffy and red from all the crying. He slammed the door to Thor chamber not caring if the others woke up all he cared about was to be in Thor arms were he felt protected and safe.
Thor, who was sound asleep, was startled awake when he felt something crawling under his blankets. He lifted his blanket up and a gentle smile appeared on his face when he saw his baby brother. “Another nightmare?” he asked as he shuffled on his bed to give Loki more room to lay down.
Loki nodded but he didn’t say anything afraid he would start crying again. Thor got out of bed and moved around his chambers as he looked for his red blanket that his mother gifted him when he was younger. Thor knew how much Loki liked that blanket he had his own but he liked his more. “I found it,” Thor said in a small triumphant voice when he saw the blanket next to the fireplace where he had been playing with his friends. He turned around to give it to Loki so he could cover himself but the sight that greeted him broke his little heart. Loki was crying. He had never seen Loki cry this much, whatever he had dreamed about it hadn’t been any good but Thor was there to keep his baby brother safe.
“Loki?” Thor called out to him gently afraid if he talked louder he would scare him. He walked up to him and he sat on the edge of the bed and a small gentle smile appeared on his lips. “Loki please don’t cry, it was just a bad dream. Here you can take my blanket. I know you like it very much. Don't forget what I told you about the blanket. This blanket will protect you when you’re afraid and when I can’t be here with you the blanket will keep you protected.” He said gently as he covered Loki with his red blanket. “Besides, nothing will hurt you little brother I promise…”
“I promised .”
Thor kissed Loki's forehead one last time and tucked a loose strand of hair behind his ear he knew Loki hated it when his hair was out of place. He gently laid him down, he unclipped his cape and he covered Loki’s body. His cape looked too big on him. Jane watched him as he tucked Loki in as if he was tucking in a small child. He stroked Loki's hair carefully and stared at him as if he was the most precious person in the whole world.
He looked up when he felt Jane Foster grip tighten even more on his shoulder. He had been so lost in his own world that he had totally forgotten about her and how long they had been here. “We should get going,” Jane whispered softly. She expected Thor to prostrate but all he did was nod his head. He gave his brother one more look before standing up and grabbing Mjölnir . “I’ll come back for you I promise” he mumbled. Jane grabbed his other hand and gently stroked his hand as a gesture of comfort even though she knew it wasn’t going to work.
“Let’s go” Thor's voice was so low that if she hadn’t been standing close to him she wouldn’t have heard him. Without saying anything else they both started walking and neither one of them looked back.
“You're such a fool” a tear rolled down Loki's pale cheek as he slowly sat up clutching Thor’s cape to his chest. He didn’t want to hurt his brother but he didn’t have any other choice. He was tired and he had no way out. His only way was to fake his death even though it was going to hurt Thor and his mother.
His breath hitched and he held back the sob that wanted to escape his throat he could feel Thor covering him with the cape just the way he did with the blanket when they were kids. The sob that he tried to keep in escaped his lips, his whole body trembled and tears rolled down his eyes. His grip on Thor's cape tightened even more.
“Forgive me brother…. but I won’t be imprisoned again….”