Work Text:
Mike was fucked. It had been months since El had said “I love you” to him and he had yet to say it back. He felt guilty, of course he loved her, he loved her more than anything but after making her wait for so long, the words didn’t feel like they were enough. He knew he had to tell her somehow it was only a question of how. Feeling desperate, he asked Nancy who said she always felt loved when Jonathan would do things for her (he made a face and she was quick to assure him it wasn’t like that, more like acts of service). He then went to his mother who predictably said that she feels loved when she’s given gifts. Baby Holly, who had overheard their conversation, said that when people love each other, they kiss. Lucas once offhandedly mentioned that he loved spending time with Max and Dustin said he didn’t like to beat around the bush and preferred to just tell Suzie he loved her directly. Everyone else’s he could do with ease, but Dustin’s, that was the very problem he was having.
Attempt 1: Acts of Service
My Dearest El,
Will tells me you’ve been struggling in school. I’m so sorry it's been hard for you, I wish I could get over to you right now and help you in person, but this will have to do. I’m sending my notes from last year and I annotated them to make it easier to understand if you’re still struggling with those. I wish you would’ve told me, El, you know I would do anything to help you. During our call next week, you can ask me questions if you have any-
El saw red, anger tingling in her veins. She stopped reading, throwing her letter down onto her bed and stormed out of her room, throwing the door of Will’s open, “You told Mike?!” she screeched, standing defensively at the foot of his bed.
Will tilted his head in confusion, moving up onto his elbows, “I’m sorry?” he asked.
“You told Mike about my trouble at school?! Are you serious?”
“Well I would assume that you told your own boyfriend you were having problems,” Will snarked, returning to his original position.
El huffed in anger, “Well I didn’t!” she yelled, “And now he probably thinks I’m stupid and that I need his help!”
“Okay, El calm down, I’m sure he doesn’t think that and besides, shouldn’t you be thankful he’s trying to help you?”
Sighing, El sat at the edge of her brother’s bed, “I am,” she said, the anger gone from her voice, “I just didn’t want to need him to be able to understand these things.”
Wil looked over at her, sadness blossoming in his chest as he thought of ways to comfort El in her relationship with Mike, “Well, think of it this way,” he said, setting his hand down on her’s, “maybe helping you is his way of showing you that he loves you.”
“I don’t know about that,” El responded, tears forming in her eyes, “He hasn’t said it since that day in the cabin, I’m starting to think he doesn’t love me anymore,” she admitted, fidgeting in her lap.
Even with his own feelings for Mike, Will thought that was ridiculous, “Of course he loves you, El.”
“I hope so.”
Acts of Service - X
Attempt 2: Gift Giving
Mike sent a present with every letter he sent. Whether it be something small like a candy bar or a whole care package, sending a present felt like a good way to let her know he was thinking of her. It’s nice of him to send presents with each of his letters. She didn’t know why he chose to send her presents and she did enjoy it for a while but after a while, she began to feel guilty, especially when the gift was something materialistic and not sentimental. For example, one time he sent her a golden teddy bear and she knew it must’ve cost him a pretty penny and even though they made plenty of it, his parents didn’t give him much money. The idea of him spending all of it on her plagues her mind so much so that she began to dread getting letters from him. As much as she loved him, empty gifts didn’t mean very much without the words to accompany them.
On the other hand, there were the times he sent meaningful gifts that made her think he did love her. This time around, he sent a set of pictures he had gone around Hawkins taking. El smiled and held them to her chest, she knew as well as anyone how much Mike hated taking pictures and the fact that he was willing to take so many for her to remind her of home meant everything. It was times like this one that gave her hope that even though it had been a while since he’d said it, that he did still love her. She must’ve gotten lost in her own mind because she hadn’t even noticed that Joyce had entered her room until she was standing right in front of her.
Startling a bit, El shook out of her thoughts and faced her mother, “Sorry Joyce,” she chuckled, putting her pictures to the side, “Were you saying something?”
The older woman crossed her arms, her eyes glittering, “Those from Mike?” she asked, pointing to the pile of pictures next to her.
“Yeah,” El responded, blushing and tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.
Joyce sat next to her daughter, nudging her with her shoulder, “He must really love you to be sending you presents like this every week.”
Hardly , thought El. All she could think about every time she received a gift from him was how much it cost or how much time it took to find it but for the sake of not spilling all her relationship insecurities on her new mom, El plastered a smile on her face and nodded her head, “Sure.”
Gift Giving - X
Attempt 3: Physical Touch
El’s visit had been going fantastically for the hour drive between the airport and the Wheeler household. Mike had his arm around her shoulder and his free hand in hers and they had been discussing all their plans for the day. When they finally made it to Hawkins, all their friends, even Max, were waiting for them in Mike’s basement. El squealed, briefly letting go of Mike’s hand which she had been holding since she left the car to envelop her friends in a tight hug, squeezing them close to her and returning to her boyfriend’s side, grabbing his hand once more, smiling as he pressed a kiss to her temple.
“Oh my God,” Lucas groaned, throwing his head back, “don’t tell me you guys are already being this disgusting.”
Will nodded, clapping him on the back, “At least you didn’t have to sit through the car ride with them, I swear I almost threw up,” he joked, faking a shudder.
“At least that hasn’t changed,” Dustin said, “Mike and El will always be gross.”
“Oh ha ha,” Mike laughed sarcastically, “Are we going or not?” he asked, using the hand that wasn’t holding El’s to gesture towards the door. The Party grumbled and made their way to the door, making jabs at the couple as they passed by. Mike rolled his eyes, his grip on El’s hand tightening.
She rubbed a comforting hand up and down his arm, “Don’t mind them, they’re just teasing us,” she said in a low voice, “I’ve missed this, it’s just like summer.”
Mike made a nervous noise of agreement and nodded, bringing her hand up to his lips and pressing a kiss to it. Just like summer , he thought, when she didn’t know I loved her. Great.
Physical Touch - X
Attempt 4: Quality Time
As nice as it was to be mercilessly bullied by the Party the day before, Mike and El decided it would be best if they spent the next day by themselves. Mike was practically jumping off the walls, he and El had never been on a proper date before. Movie nights at the cabin? Sure. Stargazing? Millions of times. But a planned out, real date? Not once. It was against the rules, El would be out in public and around people for too long, they would be too exposed, and Mike, not wanting Hopper to bar him from seeing El, never dared to break his rules. Joyce didn’t mind them going out though and Mike spent weeks debating on what he and El should do, eventually he remembered that she had never gone to an arcade before and a plan formed instantaneously.
“Mike!” El giggled when her boyfriend placed a hand over her eyes, “I already saw where we are, what are you doing?!” She reached up, playfully trying to pry his hand from her eyes but he wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her back to meet his chest and she melted into his touch.
“Well pretend you didn’t,” he whispered in her ear, “I didn’t wanna blindfold you on our way here so let’s act like this is a surprise.”
El’s hand grabbed the one he had around her waist and she laughed, throwing her head back when he took his hand off her eyes revealing the arcade, “Oh wow!” she exaggeratedly reacted, her mouth wide open in false surprise, “The arcade! I never would’ve guessed!”
“I know!” Mike responded, reflecting her enthusiasm, “You’re super lucky to have a boyfriend who can keep secrets and is really good at surprises,” he falsely bragged
“So lucky,” El laughed, grabbing his hand off of her waist and dragging him into the arcade. “What do we do first?” she asked, looking around at all her options.
Mike smiled at her, heart fluttering in his chest, “Whatever you want, I’ve been saving up quarters for a long time for this.”
“Well I’ve never been here before so you choose something for me and we’ll see how I do,” she responded, clasping her hands in front of her.
“This is a good starter,” Mike said, pulling her to the PacMan machine, “go ahead and give it a shot.” El looked at the machine ahead of her, apprehensively putting her hands on its handles. Her little character dies quickly in its first round, confusing El who still didn’t really understand how the game works. Mike put his arms around her from behind, placing his hands on her’s, “Sorry,” he laughed, “I guess I should’ve explained how to play before you started.” The game started anew and he continued, moving her hands to show her how to maneuver the controls, “So basically you use the joystick to get the yellow circle looking thing away from the ghosts and eat as many pellets as you can. It’s basically a never ending game, it’ll go on for as long as you can keep your guy alive.” After finishing the pellets on the screen, a new round began and Mike took his hands off El’s, “Now try it by yourself.”
Turns out, El is really good at video games, like really really good, like almost beating Max’s DigDug score on her first time playing good. Their whole day was spent testing out El’s gaming capabilities, Mike laughing whenever she beat someone’s high score, and playfully arguing over candy and prizes.
As she was being dropped off at Max’s after their date, El turned to Mike with a hopeful smile on her face, “I had a lot of fun today,” she said, swaying nervously, “I’ll see you soon, I love you.” Mike smiled back at her nervously wanting to but unable to return her sentiment, instead choosing to lean down and plant a kiss on her lips. He could see the disappointment in her eyes when he pulled away but she smiled at him and waved as she walked into Max’s place.
Damn it.
Quality Time - X
Attempt 5 - Words of Affirmation
El was crushed, when she finally got out of the void, she didn’t talk to anyone, she just sobbed into Mike’s arms, shuddering from the cold air hitting her skin. Even when Jonathan had made the decision to stay the night in a nearby motel, she didn’t say a thing. It was only when Will had jumped into the bathroom for a shower that she joined Mike, who was sitting dazedly on the bed they were sharing for the night, touching his arm to get his attention, “Did you mean it?” she asked, her voice hoarse from its disuse.
“I’m sorry?” Mike asked, snapping out of his train of thought, “Mean what?”
“What you said to me when I was in the void,” El responded, tears forming in her eyes, “Did you mean it?” she repeated, the question seeming more desperate.
Mike grabbed her hand, “Of course I did,” he said, making sure to look her directly in the eyes, “I’ve been trying to show you in other ways since I couldn’t say it but I guess that didn’t quite work.”
El shook her head, “I didn’t understand any of your gestures without the words, as much as I wanted to assume what you meant, I didn’t want to be wrong and end up hurt,” she explained, her voice shaking.
“I’m so sorry, El,” Mike spoke quietly, “I should’ve told you how I felt sooner, it was selfish of me to think of my fears before your feelings”
“Hey. No,” El said, grabbing his face in her hands, “Yeah, it sucked not knowing how you felt about me but that’s over now, you don’t have to feel bad for being afraid. Next time, just tell me and we’ll work through it instead of having to guess what the other means, okay?”
“Okay,” Mike responded, “I love you so much El, and I’ll keep saying it until I make up for lost time,” He pressed a kiss to the hand he had been holding,
“I love you too.” And despite her situation, El couldn’t help but smile.
Words of Affirmation - ✓