PRAISE TO THE CARDASSIAN EMPIRE [1]

The Author invokes the Cardassian Empire

in all its Magnificence to contest not the words

here found, [2]

for the truth is all that matters in matters [3]

of the State.

The inspiration for this story is Cardassia in its

Glory. [4]

Duty, power, service; achievable in this

account.

The Author hopes to serve the Empire with his

words, for the Empire has always served him

well.

[1] This is a convention in all Cardassian literature: the author must pay respect to the Empire. But you must understand, my dear Doctor, that this epic was written at the beginning of the expansion period of the Empire. I do not pretend to give you a lecture on Cardassian history, but it cannot be overstated just how remarkable it is that Ulan Corac decided to include this pledge.

[2] The Cardassian Empire at the time of publication didn’t have such an intricate system of censorship as is the case today, but the censors did require some attention to their egos.

[3] I am sure the universal translator is failing to capture the nuance of this second “matters”. It refers to everything concerning Central Command and the secrets of the state contained by the Obsidian Order.

[4] Do not think for a second that the words rhyme in the original Cardassian. That belongs to an earlier trend of Cardassian literature; a trend that Corac found tragically distasteful. I can tell you all about the internal strife of our literary authors in one of our lunches. For now, let’s just say he took care of anyone pertaining to that trend.

SHERHEM JOK

I. The patriarch Sherhem of the house of Jok

silenced his foe without hesitation nor doubt.

A foe was such that opposed it all: not only

Sherhem but of Cardassia any union. [1]

“Coward!” exclaimed the patriarch Sherhem of the

house of Jok, “a coward and a fool”, his death

came swift not long before the words resounded

in the Elders’ Hall. [2]

His duty done, his ship he ordered prepare.

The warp drive was young [3] and his head

needed time, for the patriarch Sherhem of

the house of Jok was still not as wise as when he

grew old.

[1] This should give you a clue of when the first generation of this story lived: the Cardassian Union began in the 16^th century.

[2] The Elders’ Hall was something similar to an assembly hall, in which the different families got together and discussed matters of the State. Did you see what I did there? I used the word “matter” just like in the poem. Of course, your translator will not show you what I mean, but perhaps I shall explain it one day.

[3] This is also a clue as to when the story is set. Of course, you probably find it hard to believe, since I heard humans had a rather slow development, but the Cardassians developed warp technology in the 17^th century, in the year 1670, to be more precise. What an advanced race we are! Although I don’t mean to brag.

II. Once on his ship, the Patriarch took stock

of everything for the journey to embark:

five bats of gemberry wine,

twenty qops of fine-cured meat, [1]

six boxes of zatter guns, [2]

eleven trigs of bolts and nails,

five qops of wool from well-bred yuks,

the complete almanac of the Union’s seeds,

eight breedable rens and two of their calves,

twenty-five small spying devices,

two dozen navigation permits,

four swords to slay any foes,

a sack of clothes for hardened times,

two self-sealing chests for secrets to keep,

six loyal servants whose duty was proved,

one spouse and two children, the firsts of their house,

and a corpse of an enemy to the Union. [3]

[1] Qops are an old measurement system. I am sure you can infer the meaning of the different units here displayed. It is not that important exactly how much of each thing Jok brought with him, but rather how many things he brought with him.

[2] Old Cardassian guns. It took a while for us to develop our much more sophisticated weapons.

III. If their voyage home was long,

we do not know.

If they encountered trouble on the way,

they would not tell.

If the Patriarch defended his vessel,

it is not our place to ask. [1]

After some time, the voyage was done.

And that’s all there is to say.

[1] It is indeed not our place to ask: you see, even in fiction we Cardassians appreciate our secrecy, so it wouldn’t be polite to know everything about a story. I’m sure this is familiar for you from our conversations on the subject.

IV. The corpse at the entrance was hung.

A warning.

Battle-lines drawn between Cardassia’s finest.

War was near; war as we know it, [1]

and the Jok, the Khem, the Oja, the Maar,

the Tain, the Emer and Podak; the Trell

and Nossam; the Kat and Mangall;

the Kondil, the Bic, the Lir and Jelir [2]

gathered their loyalties [3]

and no secret was safe. [4]

And the Patriarch Sherhem Jok

his sons gathered one day

and the following words he spoke:

“My sons, these are trying moments

for the Union and for the House of Jok.

We shall not allow the traitors of

the Khem, and the Oja, and the Maar, and

the Tain, and the Emer, and the Podak; not

even the Trell nor the Nossam, or the Kat

and Mangall [5] our riches to usurp, our

power to take, nor our honor to gut.

You are my heirs, my hope in the future

of this House.

I shall leave for information is of

urgency.

We shall meet again for our secrets

to share”. [6]

And thus he spoke and thus they went

the heirs and the Patriarch of the House of Jok,

the fortunes to secure

and their power to uphold.

[1] Ah, yes: war as we know it. So, not really open war but rather a more covert way of taking matters in hand. Just the other day I was thinking that some things never change: your insistence that I join you for a racquetball match, for instance; and also Cardassians and our passion for being secretive.

[2] When you finish reading this book, I’ll gift you The Complete and Comprehensive History of the Families of Cardassia by Jesec Drat, where you’ll be able to read everything about these families. That is right: they are real families. Not all fiction is fiction, my dear Doctor…

[3] That’s the way we Cardassians think regarding our family and friends: in terms of loyalty. In fact, in Cardassian language, a group of friends and/or people who’ve sworn allegiance to somebody is called “a loyalty”.

[4] The most important currency in Cardassia.

[5] Don’t you love the magnificent repetition here?

[6] This is a standard farewell for Cardassians, and, in fact, linguists believe it originated in this book. Now, I am a simple tailor, so I couldn’t tell you how much truth there is in that statement, but I think it’s a nice thing to believe in, wouldn’t you say?

V. Once parted, Sherhem Jok

his duty performed.

Intelligence was scarce [1] but

Sherhem was wise

and soon his enemies

he uncovered.

Jasir Podak his greatest foe

awaited his fate

as it was written

in the stars, and the moons,

and the encrypted messages,

and secret communiqués. [2]

His head lifted he in contempt.

“Old Sherhem, come forth”,

Jasir Podak exclaimed unashamed. [3]

“My head I do not bow for

I heard the river cry. [4]

Please, be swift, of you I beg,

and your duty fulfill.”

The Patriarch Sherhem Jok Jasik Podak approached.

“Your wishes fulfill I shall

for the Cardassian Union stronger from your death

shall rise.

Your scheming ends right now.

Your secrets with me are safe”. [5]

And so he spoke, and so he did,

and so his family was secured.

[1] I am sure I do not need to explain the intricate web of espionage that prevails in Cardassian society today. This was not always the case, and good informants were hard to find.

[2] Please, I urge you to relish the poetic quality of this juxtaposition.  

[3] No Cardassian would walk into certain death with shame in their eyes.

[4] This might sound strangely lyrical, but I assure you it is not: in that age, many informants traveled along the rivers of Cardassia Prime to acquire and spread information, which is what Corac is referring to in this verse.

[5] This is a sign of respect, that implies the death of his enemy is not a dishonorable one: for now, the secrets he held are passed and kept in the future. By his enemy, that’s true. But passed on, nonetheless. Good secrets are hard to find, so it would be a waste if they died with the person holding them, wouldn’t you agree?

again met.

Proud and dutiful, their tales they told

of how alliances they formed

and enemies slain.

And the Patriarch from his chair he rose

and his eldest son’s hand he clasped.

“My son Trudratt, soon this House

you shall lead. [1]

I am now old and no longer can tell

secret from lie. [2]

You have a lot to achieve for this House

to defend.

Your rise shall be steady and your

enemies plentiful. [3]

Come now, we shall drink

to our fortunes,

to our loyalties,

to our foes,

to our secrets,

and to our House”.

[1] I believe this is also the case of many human cultures, wouldn’t you confirm?  The eldest child gets to inherit the name and the glory of the family.

[2] This is also an old Cardassian saying, which is used to emphasize either the old age of the person or their disturbed mental state.

[3] I realize this might sound counter-intuitive to you, dear Doctor, but, for Cardassians, wishing someone to have multiple enemies is a wish of good-will, of success, and glory. The logic goes like this: the more enemies you have, the more successful you are. Unless, of course, you are but an exiled tailor with multiple enemies who might not welcome you back home… but I digress.

VII. Sherhem Jok’s Shri-Tal [1] came fast.

His son Trudratt with reverence he listened.

After a life of service to the Union,

his secrets were safe. [2]

[1] The Shri-Tal is an ancestral ritual for us Cardassians, in which a dying member of a family reveals their closely held secrets while they’re on their deathbed. That way, all relevant information is passed and never lost. It is similar to keeping the enemies’ secrets, but in a much more honorable and solemn way.

[2] Now, I remember you telling me that you found dull the fact that the characters grow old and die peacefully after a life of service to Cardassia, but I simply find this passage exhilarating. Almost as exhilarating as our first racquetball match we had yesterday…

TRUDRATT JOK

I. Now new Patriarch Trudratt,

the first-born of Jok,

had a duty to fulfill. [1]

His brother he bid farewell,

and the warmth of his heart

matched the warmth of his house. [2]

The first order of business:

a mate to find [3]

for families were many

and power was scarce. [4]

The informants [5] were sent

and the courtship [6] began.

[1] Namely, duty to the Cardassian Union, to upholding his father’s name and the family’s honor. But, of course, I presume you already figured that out.

[2] And you say the style of this epic is dry! Look at these poetic stanzas! And, remember: we Cardassians favor warm places, so this repetition is used to emphasize the deep bond of Trudratt to his family. Yes: duty, family, warmth; the trifecta of Cardassian lifestyle.

[3] This comes to show you just how much Cardassian society has evolved: now, we do not need to be involved with anybody to hold onto our honor and name. Although that doesn’t mean one cannot try…

[4] Remember that this time was one of internal strife among families, so alliances between the different ones was the key to build and hold power and family honor.

[5] Or, in other words, spies. People working for and in the family to find ideal suitors.

[6] I hope you can get a PADD and take some notes about what’s coming now.

II. The first in line

was Del Izoc.

Beautiful, intelligent,

and fertile, too.

But alas, when she spoke

her spirit was subdued,

and agreeable,

and never said no.

And, of course, Trudratt

for the next candidate

he called. [1]

The second in line

had Olic Turat for name.

Fire in her soul,

to argue she loved.

Always speaking her mind,

Trudratt entranced

he felt.

After the first interrogation, [2]

an issue came forth:

his informant informed [3]

that the Turats

in the last war [4] all their power

had lost. [5]

With heaviness in his cold heart [6]

Trudratt said no.

The third in line

so perfect was not.

Her charms were scarce

and could not bear a son. [7]

Angry, Trudratt

another he called.

Was there no one in Cardassia

who could marry him at all?

The answer was yes:

a woman named Kol.

Brilliant, outspoken,

to argue she loved; [8]

her family had power,

and she bore him many sons.

[1] It might interest you to know that Cardassian mating rituals have been quite similar for centuries. What Corac is writing about here is the need to be argumentative with your potential mate. That is the preferable attitude, as it indicates a willingness to put that energy into… other more productive endeavors. I hear that Chief O’Brien had a misunderstanding with a Cardassian scientist the other day regarding precisely this. He didn’t know that his readiness to discuss was seen as an advance on his part. Thankfully, now you can be prepared to avoid these cultural faux pas. But, of course, I do hope we argue about this epic poem with or without any double-entendres.

[2] That’s what we Cardassians call “dates”.

[3] I don’t think the universal translator can really capture the nuances that come with the verb “informed” here. This verb in Cardassian carries a meaning of undercovering secret information and sharing it only with a person of authority.

[4] The war as we know it. Remember?

[5] I find this a delicious narrative device: everything looked fine, and then their deepest secret is unveiled. It is a reminder that every powerful family should not disregard their informants; but it does sadden me that they performed their duty so well. I must be romantic at heart.

[6] Speaking of hearts… I think the translator won’t serve to explain that in Cardassian a cold heart is a good attribute: we are cold-blooded, after all.

[7] Unfortunately, fertility is still one of the main factors when considering mates on Cardassia… A dated tradition if you ask me.

[8] Note the repetition of this attribute in the mate. Exquisite, delicious, delectable.

III. Son after son, Trudratt’s family [1]

was formed.

But securing the House

from him

required more.

A man with a bright mind,

—and a mate with talent, —

soon the future

building he began.

[1] “Family” in the original Cardassian is referring to nuclear family; that is: a mate and any sons and daughters they might have together. We have many words in Cardassia for different configurations of a family. For instance, one that includes all the ancestors; or another that indicates a strong bond with a specific individual. In that case, I could, for instance, hypothetically say that you, dear Doctor, are my family. Hypothetically speaking, of course.

he decided,

that power held by one

against a hundred

could not compete.

So, for his plan,

Trudratt a council he called

of all the powerful

Cardassian families,

new and old.

The Khem, the Oja, the Maar

and the Tain

came from the north;

the Emer, the Podak, the Trell

and Nossam

from the east came to his door;

the Kat, the Mangall, and the Kondil

the west embodied so;

and the Bic, the Lir, and Jelir

from the south their loyalties they brought. [1]

And once they gathered,

Trudratt spoke so:

“My friends, my allies,

my enemies, my foes, [2]

here today I gathered you

for something must be done.

The fight between our families

has gone on long enough.

And power is more powerful

if it belongs to all. [3]

And so the Cardassian Union

can finally be strong.

Hear my words, for the following

I propose:

that we create an organization

that serves us all,

with loyalties from all the families

and enough secrets

to control,

we can have more power

than ever before. [4]

So, what do you say,

fellow Cardassians,

the future do you wish to join?” [5]

[1] Remember what the word “loyalties” means in Cardassian? I am also certain that you remember these family names from before.

[2] This is a standard Cardassian greeting, since one never really knows who you can really trust.

[3] Don’t you love these verses, my dear Doctor? This is quite an innovative approach to power: sure, Trudratt is still proposing that it is distributed among a few important families, but he is proposing the first inter-familiar alliance. I’m not suggesting that this is how it happened in reality, but sometimes fiction grants us a poetic respite from the duller aspects of life.

[4] I am unsure whether you realize that this is the seed of what will later become the Obsidian Order.

[5] Indeed, and what a bright future that was for Cardassia!

was not accepted by all:

the Kondik and the Jelir [1]

for their part they refused,

and to their Houses they returned.

But the remaining families

a pledge they signed with their word,

and Trudratt’s organization

was not barely an idea anymore.

And Trudratt’s pride was a cold dark night. [2]

[1] These are now very minor families in Cardassia. I’m sure you can guess why.

thanks to Trudratt Jok

so much power had never

had before.

Without fighting between families

as much anymore [1]

their power cemented

and Trudratt

towards his father Sherhem Jok

his respect had paid.

And the years moved,

and the hairs were greyed,

and, suddenly weak,

that the end was near

realized Trudratt Jok.

It was time for Shri-Tal,

and so his sons he called. [2]

[1] Fighting never ceases, no matter how many organizations are in place to avoid power monopolies. After all, it’s only Cardassian to want to accumulate more power than the one you have.

[2] Do not think that the Shri-Tal is only intended for males. It just happens that Trudratt’s story only contemplates male descendants. It’s reserved for important people in one’s life, usually the offspring of a person, but not necessarily. I already have in mind whom I’d invite to mine…

at the age of 101, [2]

Trudratt’s breath was

stopped.

And the dutiful life

towards Cardassia

was now to be honored

by his son. [3]  

[1] It is a strange moment in the narrative, in which we are granted a specific time frame. We thus know that we are still not in the most booming period for Cardassia, but we are getting close. It will arrive in the next generations, so I do not want to spoil the fun.

[2] This is more or less the life expectancy of male Cardassians. Female Cardassians live about 20 years longer.

[3] I know you find this rather "peaceful" demise lacking in action and interest, but I do need to emphasize that for Cardassians, little is more interesting than serving the Empire dutifully. Indeed, before I was exiled, few things interested me more. Now, on the other hand...

BRAM JOK

I. Bram Jok the Sly

the secrets of his House he now held.

He called on his brothers

for the funeral rites [1]

to set.

The affair was private [2]

and duty to the Union

was observed. [3]

His mother Bram took

to live in comfort

away

and the rest of her days

with glory he secured. [4]

[1] Here we go: a new generation of dutiful Cardassians, something you must try not to find dull, my dear Doctor. I, for one, find the decision to begin this section precisely where we left it in the previous generation a marvelous choice. It is unusual for a poem of these characteristics to focus on such ordinary affairs. However, if you must know, Cardassian funeral rites are a very important part of our culture, so maybe Corac wanted to give his poem realism.

[2] Funerals are also quite private. Only close family is allowed to attend… and that is all I am allowed to say. You see, while I’d love to give you more details, secrecy is the most important aspect of our funeral rites. I am sure you will understand.

[3] I suppose Ulan Corac is assuming no other species than Cardassians would read this poem, for this is quite the indiscretion. But, since the damage is already done, I shall share with you that there is a pledge to the Cardassian Empire in our funeral rituals. In this case, of course, it is still a pledge to the Union.

[4] As you know, family is paramount for us, which is why this verse would not stand out for any intended readers. Now, I am aware of your own personal struggles with your family, so I truly hope you will not find these references too hurtful. I am, as you know, here to listen if you need an ear to which relate your frustrations.

was cunning and wise,

and with counsel of his mother, [2]

an idea

blossomed in his mind.

It was the color of obsidian [3]

and slithered its way

like a snake

until all his mind it

had conquered, [4]

and there was nothing else

left. [5]

[1] Did you notice the two sections begin in the same manner? Repetition is present in this epic poem in many different ways. Just like your invitations to lunch, which always manage to surprise me in their different modulations of the same message.

[2] Again, the importance of families for Cardassians is something that Ulan Corac wants to emphasize. As I believe I have told you already, age is seen as something to be revered in Cardassia, so you can surely understand why Bram would turn to his mother in the lookout for counsel.

[3] I am sure you must have realized that this is no incidental description.

[4] This metaphor, I find delightful. Think of it this way: though we are a bipedal species, snakes are somehow our kindred. A spiritual animal of sorts.

[5] Have you not had something, or someone, take ahold of your mind so completely that you cannot think of anything else? I must confess that I have.

III. For the idea to develop

many things he needed

to control.

But Bram Jok the Sly

had patience to spare

[1] Now, I know you might argue that this passage is not the most literary there is. And yet, I’d argue that transitional scenes like these are necessary to appreciate the most significant passages. After all, all literature, and especially Cardassian, has an ulterior motive and it is our job as good, conscientious readers to try to uncover it. But, please, do not stop here on my account. Keep enjoying the marvelous experience of reading this poem.

that Bram Jok the Sly his cunning

movements began.

Slowly over the months,

his position

clear he made:

three pillars would be needed

for Cardassians to succeed.

First, the net of spies

that his Father had begun

now an official order would be,

the color of Obsidian. [2]

Second, a military branch,

with the name of Central Command.

Finally, a government

of civilians, to oversee

the previous ones. [3]

His idea was a new one,

and many hours

in the heat [4]

were required for his views

to be expressed.

Why would so many

organizations be required

for the power to dilute?

Bram Jok had the answer:

the power would continue

to be held by the families [5]

but with the three new enterprises

individual skills would be best utilized. [6]

Thus he spoke, and thus he explained,

and the future of Cardassia

again was held in the hands of Jok.  

[1] As you might be aware, Cardassians enjoy hot and humid weather, so there are many records of saunas that go back to as early as the third century. They are not only a place of rest and relaxation, but, more importantly, a safe and secretive place where vital meetings were held. Many are still held, in fact. I must admit I have made good use of Quark’s sauna holoprogram. If you are interested in seeing how they look like, I can take you there one day.

[2] Yes, my dear Doctor, this is indeed the beginning of the Order that brought me many good memories, and some more distasteful unpleasantries.

[3] This civilian government is the Detapa Council. As Corac says, in the beginning, it oversaw both the Obsidian Order and Central Command but, as you very well know, power and its configuration are much more complicated than they seem in Cardassia, so it wouldn’t be correct to say it still holds the same relevance as it did before.

[4] A Cardassian expression to refer to the saunas, but the turn of phrase implies these are saunas in which meetings take place.

[5] Always the same families, for centuries, holding power… isn’t it just delightful?

[6] I believe this is a key change in the mentality of how Cardassians should interact and serve their State. This is a fundamental shift into modern Cardassia. Remember what I told you about ulterior motives?

the power was thus shared:

Elim Khem, Bastel Oja, Milnak Maar,

Ulan Tain, Kasim Emer and Tus Podak

Were now members of the Central Command.

Trusik Trell, Naster Nossami, Jel Kat and

Luc Mangall,

would take care of the Council now named Detapa.

And Jem Kondil, Brot Bic, Urok Lir, Jor Jelir

and, of course, our Bram Jok the Sly

the secrets of Cardassians would hold

in the Obsidian Order of glory and honor. [1]

[1] I am certain you must have noticed that the families here mentioned are the same as the ones Corac has already repeatedly written about. As I mentioned in one of my post notes, these families are indeed real. As for the Joks… well, who’s to say they are not? The truth is that we don’t really know. I can tell you that at the moment there’s no family bearing that name, but that might have been due to an unfortunate event that erased all records for posteriority. I am, of course, digressing again, so I’ll stop now and allow you to enjoy this wondrous repetitive epic. However, I must say I cannot wait for the moment in which you read this note, so we can have a discussion about oligarchy, fact and fiction, history and many more things that might come up to your wondrous mind.

he re-built,

Bram Jok the Sly his family

built so. [1]

Sons and daughters

in abundance

who would help him

grow.

Toel Jok was the eldest,

and Bram the Shri-Tal

he called. [2]

[1] This second “built” is a verb specifically used to refer to family. As you are well aware, and more so after reading so many enthralling passages from this poem, family is a pillar of Cardassian culture, and, thus, many words specifically refer to this institution.

[2] I must confess this moment always makes me tear-up a little. The moment in which Bram recognizes the end of his life is near and decides it’s time to share so many hard-earned secrets with his son. Simply heart-breaking. Such an important moment in the life of both father and son.

VII. Toel Jok the eldest

was merely thiry-five years old

when his father,

Bram Jok the Sly finally

could rest. [1]

[1] I just had the most outlandish idea; you can't even imagine. I must admit that this enterprise is becoming rather… lonesome. Especially when we have lunch so frequently and I must—wouldn’t you know—keep this a secret. And, while, of course, I am naturally inclined to keep this a secret, I suddenly thought that maybe it would be a good idea to share it with you and allow you to ask me any questions that should arise in the following sections. I shall attempt to answer them with accuracy, although I cannot promise there won’t be things that are strictly secretive for anyone non-Cardassian. In any case, I urge you to read everything I have annotated so far, and not to hesitate in making your own notes in what it is yet to come—namely, four more generations of dutiful Cardassians.

TOEL JOK

I. Long years of service to

Cardassia (1)

awaited Toel Jok

who, despite being the eldest,

was still very young.

With no mate to his name,

and no children from any mistress (2)

Toel Jok the Young

was free of commitment

save for the State.

But in his ambition

he wanted more.

(1) You see, this is one of the things that are hard for me to understand in this epic. All of the characters are leading lives of service to Cardassia without any question about it. I just don’t find them believable.

[1] Well, Doctor, think about it: I am sure there are similar examples in Ancient Earth literature in which nationalistic exaltation is the rule. You must remember that this is a foundational text for Cardassian literature and, in part, its representation of loyalty to the Empire (before it became the empire) is one of the reasons why.

(2) Are children born out of wedlock accepted as legitimate?

[2] Family is the most important institution for us Cardassians… no matter in which configuration. Children from mistresses are usually accepted as one’s own; they take the family name and there is no shame associated to their origins. Quite a civilized approach, if you ask me.

deep in his mind,

and a will as strong

as the Union (1),

Toel Jok the Young

his career began

in Cardassian Central Command. (2)

However, all was not easy

for Toel Jok the Young: (3)

his success and

the legacy of his family

were seen with jealousy

and suspicion. (4)

Secrets so powerful were hard

to come by,

and a foe of Toel Jok the Young

soon came to his life.

(1) See, these comparisons I simply find… unappealing. Couldn’t the author have found something else more poetic?

[1] Doctor, Cardassia and its Union—later Empire—are the most poetic thing a writer can refer to. At least for Cardassians.

(2) You surely cannot expect me to believe that the members of this family were part of every single branch of Cardassian life.

[2] Why would I not expect you to believe that? After all, this epic is, in a way, an exemplary tale, designed to instill young Cardassians a sense of pride and belonging in all aspects Cardassian life has to offer.

(3) I think you mentioned this to me once in one of our lunches, but why the insistence of repeating the same structure of a name?

[3] This is a repetitive epic, Doctor. I think the author uses this not only as a way to emphasize the repetitive nature of the opus, but also as a form to remind the reader of at least one quality associated with the character they are reading about. After all, reading about seven different generations could arguably become confusing. Repetition, thus, is favored over confusion.

(4) I thought families like this one would be respected.

[4] And they are, but also envied. And remember that much of the power a Cardassian can hold is built upon secrecy, so it is only natural that suspicions of where that power came from arise.

III. His name was

Elim Jedratt (1)

and his purpose

was clear:

to uncover

Toel Jok the Young’s

secrets and power.

He plotted his demise

with all the informants

he had.

Perchance he could trick him

by pretending to be not

who he was. (2)

(1) Wait, are you named after the antagonist of this poem?

[1] My dear Doctor, it might interest you to know that Elim is quite a common Cardassian name. It is rather presumptuous to assume that my parents might have named me after this fictional character. However, if they did so, you might also want to revise your definitions of good and evil. That this character wishes the demise of our protagonist does not make him any more evil than the protagonist himself. You see, understanding the motivations of the characters is one of the joys of this poem.

(2) I must admit that I am beginning to appreciate the different plot-points that change generation to generation. Not that repetitive, is it?

[2] And you were saying you found this epic boring! Yes, the story must change in order to keep entertaining its readers, must it not? Repetition comes in different forms, and not necessarily in the plot.

Gul Toel Joek the Young (1)

Elim Jedratt to work began.

Toel Jok soon liked him

and so, he began to trust. (2)

Not many secrets

were shared

but one was enough.

And Smarmy Elim to bring

our hero down

he tried.

The Legate he contacted

first,

the Order (3) he reached

then,

and a committee investigations

on Toel Jok the Young

began. (4)

(1) When has it been mentioned that Toel is a Gul?

[1] Here, my dear Doctor. It was established that Toel began working for Central Command, so there simply has been an ellipsis in which time has passed and he has moved up the ranks.

(2) I assume this is part of a cautionary tale for children not to trust strangers.

[2] You are correct. For children and adults alike. And about not trusting anyone, not only strangers. You see, this is why it’s taken me so long to open up to you—it simply is not in my Cardassian nature. Of course, I still keep my most important secrets away from you, though I must admit my stay at DS9 has somehow softened my stance. It might have to do with the present company.

(3) The Obsidian Order?

[3] Is there any other?

(4) What power would this committee have over Toel Jok should they find him guilty of something?

[4] It depends on what they find him guilty of. I must say I am finding your questions rather amusing, Doctor. Of course, they could kill him, if that’s what you’re asking. But bear in mind there are many more punishments Cardassians enjoy exerting. Exile from Cardassia and being forced to survive as a tailor comes to mind.

he also his suspicions

had kept,

and as the investigation

took shape,

so did his tricks. (1)

His informants had kept him

informed (2)

so when they came for him

no evidence was found. (3).

(1) Ah, I see. That’s the other part of the moral: never trust anyone and always keep a trick up your sleeve.

[1] You sound as Cardassian as me. I am touched. Perhaps I am rubbing off on you.

(2) Is this another one of those verbs the universal translator cannot translate properly?

[2] You are correct. I believe we encountered one of these before—information shared with your superiors.

(3) Wait, but the fact that he had to destroy evidence doesn’t imply that he was guilty?

[3] Of course he was, Doctor. Of which, we do not know, but the moral of this story is not, as you humans would say, to do no harm, but rather that when you do harm, you need to cover the evidence. This is again one of our irreconcilable cultural differences.

against his name,

Toel Jok the Young

Legate was proclaimed (1)

and Elim Jedratt

from Cardassia was exiled. (2)

(1) Is this a common practice in Cardassia?

[1] Why wouldn’t it be? If a slander arrives nowhere, that means your informants are not up to the standards required by Central Command, and, thus, the Legate should be relieved of his post. And what better substitute than the man slandered to take over?

(2) I find this tale quite familiar…

[2] I knew you would comment on that. What can I say, Doctor? It seems my life might be more literary than I realized. Hopefully, it will have a happy ending… perhaps some steaming romance…

VII. Toel Jok the Young

lived for many years more.

He had many sons and daughters

and glory to the Union

brought as a Legate.

By the time of his Shri-Tal,

it was the dawn

of a new epoch. (1)

(1) Every end of a generation is the “dawn of a new epoch”, but they all seem quite similar to me. And I know your response will be something along the lines that the epic is supposed to be repetitive, and that every generation is indeed representing a distinctive era of Cardassian history. Still… I would like a different ending for at least one generation, to have some variety.

By the way, I read your last comment, and I do believe there is space for romance in your literary life.

[1] Ah, my Doctor, your comments somehow always lighten up my morning. Yes, you are indeed correct in your assumptions regarding what I would have answered about the ending of the generations. As for your last remark… I am relieved you seem to think so. Tailoring can be a lonely profession, after all.

OLA JOK

I. The eldest son of Toel Jok

was a daughter,

Ola, First Matriarch of the Joks, (1)

and her intelligence and wisdom

in men

had no match. (2)

More cunning than her father,

and beautiful

as a treacherous secret, (3)

Ola’s life was ready for success.

(1) You will have to explain how birthright works in Cardassia. I thought women took their husband’s family name and could not lead a family?

[1] And you thought wrong, my Doctor. Well, half-wrong, in any case. Yes: it is true that usually women take the family name of their husband, but if a woman is the eldest child of her family, she will be in charge of carrying that name forward. Thus, no matter who she marries, the family name—Jok in this case—will prevail. Unless, of course, she married someone from a much more powerful house. That practice, however, is inadvisable, for it would mean the extinction of her family name. Am I making any sense? It is, after all, quite an intricate system. The most important thing to remember here is that Cardassian women can, and indeed do, carry the family name forward.

(2) I am impressed by the progressive stance regarding women in this work, considering it is a couple hundred years old.

[2] Cardassian women are, and have always been, regarded as much more intelligent than men. That is why they are usually the scientists in our society.

(3) I think I am beginning to appreciate the beauty of these comparisons.

[3] Well, I am truly glad to read this. You will soon begin to use them yourself, and in your mouth, they will be even more beautiful than the best-held of secrets.

and her wits

sharp as a dagger, (2)

Ola the Order

joined

for being the greatest spy

was

her biggest desire. (3)

(1) I guess this situates the story right after the death of her father, correct?

[1] Correct, indeed. This is quite a typical way of referencing a patriarch’s (or matriarch’s) death in Cardassian. You know we usually favor subtlety over bluntness.

(2) I am taking some notes on another of these comparisons so I can use them later, as you suggested.

[2] Imagination is a treacherous thing, dear Doctor, but I must admit the image that popped into my head while reading your note was quite delightful…

(3) I find it interesting that there were no limitations for women to join and be part of the Obsidian Order.

[3] My dear Doctor, I think I have already told you that Cardassian society was quite more advanced than Earth’s society in this same period of development. Why wouldn’t a woman be a great spy? Secrets know no gender.

III. As a spy for the Order,

Ola soon her power

increased.

In her dinners,

numerous dignitaries

of the Council (1)

she encountered.

Her dinner-table

was always plentiful

with dishes such as

neemuk, and halant stew,

taspar eggs with yamok sauce,

zabo steak and zabu stew,

larish pie and ikri bun,

and many more delicacies. (2)

With such an exhibition,

and her table set,

her dinners served

many secrets

and everyone was fed. (3)

(1) Why is it that these official names are always shortened? I assumed this is the Detapa Council?

[1] Indeed it is. They are shortened because it is assumed the readers know what the author is referring to. Just like I call you simply Doctor, rather than using your name, or you use Garak. Familiarity usually eliminates redundancy.

(2) I hope you can someday show me these Cardassian treats.

[2] Any time you want, Doctor. In fact, why don’t we meet tomorrow night in my quarters, and I’ll replicate a small portion of each of these plates so you can have a tasting. And if there’s a dish you particularly enjoy, I can replicate a bigger ration. What do you say?

(3) I am also noticing different spots to gather information: saunas, dinner-tables…

[3] I can show you all the best Cardassian spots to spy on others…

Ola the Order led,

and with her rise to power,

she knew it was time

to find a mate

so that the family of Jok

and its secrets

would never end. (1)

(1) I think this might be my favorite character so far. The struggle to juggle being the head of the family along with succeeding in her demanding job… I find it quite compelling.

I also find your invitation to dinner compelling. I will stop by your quarters at around 20:00 tonight, if that is okay with you. I am intrigued to taste everything you have promised. As for the spa… we could discuss a time while we eat tonight.

[1] My dear Doctor, you will realize what you’ve been missing when you have your first taste of Cardassian cuisine tonight! Now, I am not the most skilled chef there is, but I hope you will find some pleasure in my cooking.

they all courted Ola Jok

and after much consideration,

the right match

was found. (1)

His name matters not, (2)

but he gave her many

children—

a big family to control.

Head of the Order,

head of the Joks,

Ola’s power was unmatched,

and her life

was as bright as the Union. (3)

(1) I find quite a contrast in this courtship passage: previously we’ve been given a long process for a male head of the family to find the right mate, whereas here, Corac seems to be glossing over it.

[1] I will admit there is a difference between the two courtships we have read about. But, let me ask you this, dear Doctor: would it be better for Corac to write about a process from a perspective completely foreign to him? I believe the lack of information on how a female-led courtship would be conducted, especially so many centuries ago, when secretiveness in between the sexes was at a high point, is our culprit here for the lack of details. I do encourage you, however, to try to fill out the gaps with that wondrous imagination of yours…

(2) We don’t even get the name of her husband? I recall we had the name of all the different suitors of Trudratt Jok…

[2] My dear Doctor, the name of her husband is completely inconsequential for this story. I believe the author is trying to emphasize Ola’s importance by, in turn, belittling the rest of the characters. Were you not captivated by her? Your favorite character, I believe you called her… I’d suggest that you tried to leave your human literary biases behind and enjoyed the depiction of our protagonist.

(3) But not as bright as the eggs with yamok sauce you cooked for me the other day… I cannot get them out of my mind.

than anyone, (1)

Ola had a plan:

the Union needed

change,

expansion,

so that all the citizens

could better

live

to serve the Union. (2)

(1) Is this a euphemism for power?

[1] Has this not been clear from the start? We are, after all, five generations deep into this epic, Doctor.

(2) Because, of course, the best thing that a Cardassian could do with their life is serve the Empire.

[2] Indeed! Or, in this case, the Union. The happier the population, the better they could serve the State—it’s simple logic, as our Vulcan colleagues would say. This happens also in different aspects of life. For instance, every time we meet, I perform my tailoring skills with far more proficiency.

VII. Ola’s life lasted

a hundred and thirty

hot and humid summers. (1)

Her wisdom and cunning

a foundation

had laid,

for future generations

to glory seek

in the vastness of space.

Eventually the Union

would become more (2)

but, alas, poor Ola

only saw it in her mind.

Her vision was clear

but it would take long,

for different political changes

would lead

her son. (3)

(1) I must admit I find this metaphor quite poetic. I understand that for Cardassians hot and humid weather must be paradise. For humans, however, humidity and heat often bring with them too much sweat and discomfort. If I have to choose, I prefer dry heat.

[1] I am elated that you are finally understanding the beauty of Cardassian rhetorical devices. And, in terms of heat, we don’t really mind humid or dry, as long as it is indeed hot. We Cardassians, do not sweat, you see.

This talk of sweat and heat has reminded me that we never got to go to the Cardassian sauna I talked to you about. If you are still interested, do let me know. I must say I find human sudoriferous glands quite interesting to observe at work.

(2) The Empire?

[2] Indeed! The first reference to our most glorious period in history. It’s a pity it doesn’t get featured more in depth, but, as you know, this epic was written in an early period of the Empire, so it does not move much further than from the beginning.

(3) The syntax of this phrase confused me the first time I read it. Now, as I re-read it, I could see it more clearly. It must be that I am reaching new levels of understanding Cardassian literature thanks to you.

[3] I feel truly honored to hear so. Isn’t it marvelous to find someone who can help you see life in a different manner than what you’re used to?

TRUDRATT II JOK (1)

I. Ola Jok’s eldest son

was named

Trudratt Jok, second

of his name,

in honor

of the ancestor

who had the vision

to plant the seed

of the Obsidian Order,

so well honored by Ola

with her life.

Trudratt the Second

the loss of his mother felt so,

and for many long years

his fate

could not fulfill. (2)

But the Joks were strong,

and with family support (3)

Trudratt found his way,

for Cardassian history

to write once again. (4)

(1) I wonder why the author couldn’t have chosen a different name for this character.

[1] That is the beauty of a repetitive epic, Doctor: even the names of our protagonists can be repeated! But worry not; after we read that ancient human novel, One Hundred Years of Solitude I believe it was called, I think you are more than suited for characters with repeated names. This epic is far more straightforward—it needs to convey its message with a less confusing approach.

(2) This is quite an interesting depiction of depression, in a time in which I’m not sure Cardassians had a name for it. My medical mind cannot help but wonder.

Changing the subject, I just read your comment regarding the sauna, and I think it might be a fun plan, if you agree to then go to a human one, so we can compare experiences.

[2] Always the scientist first, Doctor! Of course, I truly think that, for scientific purposes, we should indeed attend both types of saunas.

Regarding your original comment about depression, I believe Cardassian doctors would diagnose it as “not enough commitment to the Empire”. One of the values of this epic, thus, is that it allows itself to explore topics that are quite taboo in Cardassian society.

(3) I also find it compelling that it is his family who helps Trudratt out of his depressive state.

[3] Family is everything for Cardassians, as you very well know. And, of course, family members would band together to assist the Patriarch in times of need.

(4) What an astounding family this is, that every single patriarch always manages to lead not only an exemplary life, but a historic one.

[4] Indeed! An example for all Cardassians to follow! Of course, I have read your sarcastic tone, but, as always, I would like to urge you to suspend your disbelief, Doctor. That is also a common practice in human literature, is it not?

wanted to bring

for Cardassia.

First, in Central Command,

then, in the Council,

he tried to make his mark. (1)

As his power increased,

so did his boldness

and soon

a meeting he called

with all the secretful (2)

leaders

and Guls and Legates

of the Command.

Because they knew

his family, (3)

to speak freely

he was allowed.

(1) I wonder how easily one would move up the ranks of both the Detapa Council and Central Command.

[1] Well, in this case, and because the family is an influential one, I would venture to say about a decade passed between both of his enterprises.

(2) That is a very Cardassian way to say powerful.

[2] Look at you, Doctor! You are indeed getting fluent in Cardassian turns of phrases. A couple more days in that sauna, and you might start growing scales…

(3) A question just came to my head: just how influential was your family, Garak? After all, you did get into high positions within the Obsidian Order, right?

[3] I find your question a bit direct for my liking, Doctor. As you know, I did garner some influence within my tenure in the Order. What my family did before me… I shall keep it for my Shri-Tal. Perchance you might find out when that time comes…

III. “Hear me all,

friends, allies,

enemies and foes”, (1)

began Trudratt Jok his speech

to hold,

“this status quo has gone

on long enough.

The families are stale,

the secrets too hollow. (2)

We need to change;

we need to evolve.

I propose our Union

we make grow

by travelling the stars

and adding worlds

to our own”. (3)

Thus he spoke

and his words

tumultuous arguments

spawned. (4)

(1) If I remember correctly, you said this was a standard greeting for Cardassians, right? Would it then, for instance, be appropriate for me to greet you like this?

[1] Ah, Doctor, what an interesting vision: having you call me your friend, your ally, your enemy, your foe… It is definitely not required due to the nature of our… relationship. But I must admit I find the notion amusing, to say the least.

(2) The whole capitalization of secrets for Cardassian society is without doubt a culture shock for me. Secrets seem far more important than anything else!

[2] Yes, I agree it is an essential difference between our cultures. And, yes, secrets are indeed the most important capital for Cardassians. But that does not necessarily mean we don’t value other things…

(3) Wait, is this the first time Cardassia expands? If so, why have we been talking about a Union? I thought that already included other planets.

[3] No, dear Doctor, the Union simply refers to a union between the three branches of government in Cardassia. Of course, there had been some early incursions into the vastness of space, but this is the first mention of an actual expansionist policy. In other words, the seeds of the Empire.

(4) I wouldn’t have imagined this proposal caused controversy. It seemed a natural stage of development.

[4] Sometimes great ideas face unexpected challenges.

Speaking of great ideas and natural stages of development…. I have one that might be both: I have a new holoprogram set precisely on this moment of Cardassian history that I developed just for us. Would you care to join me to test it?

protested Tun Kalok, (1)

“Cardassia’s splendor

needs no expansion.

Our greatness lies

within us; within our secrets

and our schemes.

To search for it outside

is as trying to find

information

out of a dead man”. (2)

“I disagree, Legate Kalok”,

now spoke Emok Tain, (3)

“Cardassian greatness

needs to be known.

By expanding through

the vastness of space

we can finally

take our righteous

place

in the pages of history.

Our secrets will be more,

our military more powerful

than ever,

our land never-ending”.

More spoke

the two sides representing (4)

and the council

stretched for five days and four nights.

Finally, a decision

was reached,

and Cardassian history

(1) I must say, Garak, that after seeing this scene in the holoprogram you created, Cardassian history seems much more interesting than ever. I didn’t know you had such a talent in holoprogramming.

[1] Oh, my dear Doctor, I have many talents that might surprise you… if you ever care to explore them.

(2) Isn’t the Shri-Tal, in a way, a form of getting information from a man who’s about to die?

[2] Ah, but the about is key there—once the man is dead, there is no more information to be extracted. The comparison, thus, is not flawed.

(3) Wait, is this Tain related to the man I met when I was trying to find information on your cranial implant?

[3] Doctor, all important Cardassian families can be traced back for centuries, as I already established in one of my earlier notes. As for the man you met… I’d rather skip any further commentary on him.

(4) I have to say I prefer your holo-version to this one. At least yours added many more arguments Corac seems to have no interest in exploring.

[4] They are different media, Doctor. The more visual holoprogram lends itself better to more characters interacting, whereas an epic poem might not be concerned in pursuing that. However, I shall take that compliment and put it in a safe place.

(5) I was thinking, Garak, that since you showed me this part of Cardassian history, it’s only fair that I show you part of human history. Chief O’Brien and I have created several holoprograms about it, but I can create one especially for you.

[5] Doctor, your offer is quite tempting, I must say. I believe there were periods in your history with heavy espionage, were there not? Just like that make-believe spy program you had, but in real life. I would love to revisit that period of history with you.

the man

the first Cardassian expedition

to lead

into unknown space.

The cargo hold was

Full

with

five bats of gemberry wine,

twenty qops of fine-cured meat,

six boxes of zatter guns,

eleven trigs of bolts and nails,

five qops of wool from well-bred yuks,

the complete almanac of the Union’s seeds,

eight breedable rens and two of their calves,

twenty-five small spying devices,

two dozen navigation permits,

four swords to slay any foes, (1)

and twenty-four members of the

most loyal crew. (2)

(1) Wait, this list looks familiar… isn’t exactly the same as the one Sherhem Jok had?

[1] This is indeed a repetitive epic, Doctor. So, unsurprisingly, there are repeated things. It surprises me that you have not commented on the more structural repetitions here with this generation: Trudratt Jok II is having the same issues that his namesake had—a heated argument between different factions, with the future of Cardassia at stake.

(2) Now, how loyal would this crew be?

[2] As loyal as any Cardassian, of course. Putting it in human terms, I’d say just about as loyal as those spies we saw in the holosuite yesterday were to their respective countries… Thus, just as loyal as the circumstances required.

reached he,

Cardassia II

the name he coined. (1)

His mission was

a Cardassian government

to found,

and the natives, if any,

to the glory of the Union

to convert. (2)

Trudratt did as he was commanded,

and soon ready he

became

the expansion to continue. (3)

(1) Not too imaginative, was he?

[1] I do not understand, Doctor: this was possibly the best name he could have selected. Concise, practical… clearly Cardassian.

(2) Quite a euphemism for a colonization, isn’t it?

[2] Doctor, I believe you are now more than familiar with Cardassian… subtleties. This should not come as a surprise, then.

(3) I’m sorry that this comment has nothing to do with the text, but I was just remembering how you looked in your Soviet uniform, and I can’t seem to get it out of my head.

[3] Dear Doctor, then perhaps we should pay another visit to the holosuites to assuage your wandering mind… wouldn’t you agree?

VII. It was on Cardassia III

where Trudratt Jok II

his end came to meet.

He had seen more than one-hundred

and twelve (1)

hot summers

and on Cardassia III

some children he had

with mistresses and mate.

It was his eldest daughter

who would hear his

Shri-Tal,

and the legacy and honor

of the Joks

her duty would become

to protect. (2)

(1) I think you told me this was standard life-span for male Cardassians, wasn’t it? Then it means we will probably live more or less just as long as each other, if we’re lucky. Humans’ life-spans are a bit longer, but not by much.

[1] Is that a proposition, Doctor? Are you planning on staying with me to check who lives longer? I thought you had some aversion to aging, judging from your reaction to your last birthday. I am, of course, willing to make you understand the Cardassian veneration to old age, if you are ever so curious.

(2) Garak, I just read your comment about returning to the holosuite. I’d say it’s a date!

[2] A date, is it? I’ll note it as an engagement on my agenda. I shall be there when you ask me to.

ERIA JOK

I. Eria Jok had a brave

soul, a cold heart,

and a mind full of secrets.

Cardassia III felt too small;

the glory of the Union

needed more expanse.

As young as thirty she was

when a new adventure

she began.

Soon her name would be

known

by all the children of Cardassia. (1)

(1) I’m really sorry that I cannot seem to concentrate on the reading tonight. I simply cannot take the kiss out of my mind.

[1] Doctor, I am flattered that I occupy a portion of your thoughts. Last night was certainly as remarkable as the best Cardassian literature.

needed no crew

to spread Cardassian

glory across the vastness of space.

Her ship was small

but her power great (1)

and in less than a year

five more planets and two

asteroids

her presence and that of Cardassia

had come to know. (2)

(1) I know of a certain Cardassian who holds even greater power over me than Eria could ever have.

[1] Growing bold, aren’t we, Doctor? I must admit that I find it quite appealing. It becomes you.

(2) This is remarkable: the first time I read these verses, I didn’t think much of them. Today, however, they have spoken to me in ways I did not think possible, for I, too, have come to know of your presence—and, in a way, that of Cardassia—.

[2] They have spoken to you in a marvelous way, no doubt. I jest, of course. It has been quite a pleasure getting to know your presence too, Doctor, which I value as much as the best-held secret.

III. Of all the planets

conquered,

Eria settled on Cardassia IV,

where the weather was hot

and the wind brought humidity

to the natural saunas, [1]

and the year was a constant

summer.

Life was long and grey (2)

and Eria

Cardassia IV to lead

was asked.

As she found it agreeable,

agree she did,

and the new conquered people

and the Cardassian settlers (3)

loved her leadership. (4)

[1] Doctor, I apologize for breaking our little dynamic, but as I was re-reading this part I could not contain myself and I needed to tell you that I really wish you could see Cardassia IV in all its splendor: on a hot and humid summer day, its two suns burning bright in the sky… we could have a great time in one of the thousand saunas across the land… if only I could come back…

(1) Garak, don’t worry about our dynamic. I was just about to comment on that verse as well, so it seems we are reading the same thing at the same time… separated only by a few bulkheads. I would love to see Cardassia IV someday, despite the hot and humid weather, which is not exactly my cup of tea. For you, however, I’d go pretty much anywhere… I am sorry that you miss your home. Perhaps we can create a replica on the holosuites?

[1] Your kindness always manages to surprise me. I would like to work with you on the holoprogram very much.

(2) This verse has reminded me of an ancient human poem, “Fern Hill” by Dylan Thomas; specifically, to the line “Time held me green and dying”.

[2] Well, this is quite the opposite, wouldn’t you say? I think Corac here is highlighting the beauty of life in all its length while your Earth poem seems to depict the ephemeral aspect of life even from a young age.

(2) You do have a point, though I must say in my defense that it was the similarity in the construction what brought the poem to my mind. Still… I think I wouldn’t mind living a long and grey life by your side, Garak.

[2] Well, Doctor, it wouldn’t be a displeasure for me either.

(3) I think this is the first time Cardassian subtleties are nowhere to be found.

[3] The reason for this, in my humble opinion, is that Corac wants to accentuate Eria’s military and political skills, both very highly needed to be a good Cardassian.

(4) I somehow don’t believe this…

[4] Then I am begging you to try.

(4) I might need you to come here to convince me…

[4] If duty calls…

justly cruel, (1)

her guilty rulings (2)

always caused frenzy

among the public of devoted Cardassians.

Her ample intelligence

always made the trials

the most expected spectacle. [3]

A better leader for Cardassia

was nowhere to be found,

so the Council, and the Order,

and Central Command

begged her to Cardassia Prime

to return. [4]

But Eria stood firm:

it was better to rule fully

than to rule only in one branch. (5)

Her reasons they understood

and an agreement was reached:

one year in Cardassia IV

she would stay

and another in Central Command. (6)

(1) I must say, Garak, that I find it a bit silly to comment this part having you in the same room.

[1] Oh, but Doctor, I find the silliness quite endearing. This way, I can observe your face as you read passages that you dislike or that confuse you. And, let me tell you: it is quite a view.

(1) Okay, okay, you have convinced me. I’ll comment, then, that this juxtaposition of being justly cruel is the epitome of Cardassian features.

[1] Are you sure those scales have still not appeared on your skin?

(2) Is this second ruling another shortcoming of the universal translator?

[2] Yes, actually. Both rulings have quite a different connotation in Cardassian. I admit that I thought your comment would be focused on the fact that the rulings are always guilty, which is a feature of the Cardassian justice system.

(2) Oh, no, I knew about that. Believe me: Chief O’Brien has told me all about what he thinks of your justice system.

[3] This is also a translator shortcoming that makes me truly sorry you cannot read the original. It is a play on words, and a clever one at that: expect and observe are the same word in Cardassian, so a spectacle is always observed, although not always expected, so as a reader you need to decide which of the two meanings applies here.

(3) I think I got lost in your explanation but I expect you to explain it to me better while having dinner later.

[3] Of course! And what a spectacle that will be!

[4] I must confess a vulnerability here, Doctor—and only because you insist that I share some insights about my feelings with you—. This passage makes me wish they would some day ask me to return to Cardassia. How lucky some people are! And they don’t even know they’re lucky.

(4) Garak, first: thank you for this opportunity to get to know what’s going on in that head of yours. And, secondly, I do hope that you can realize that, even though you cannot go back to Cardassia, you are lucky as well. At least, I feel lucky to have you in my life and I hope… well, you understand what I mean.

[4] Doctor, I’m sorry for my tactlessness. I do feel lucky to have you. You are right: I am lucky. I must remind myself more often.

(4) Don’t worry: I can be in charge of that.

(5) This doesn’t seem too loyal to the Union, does it?

[5] You are quite right; thus why she is not allowed to keep full power: it would be an expensive mistake for Corac to portray such a thing. However, I do have a soft spot for Eria’s will of accumulation of power.

(6) Quite a… diplomatic solution.

[6] Sometimes we Cardassians can be understanding. It all depends on the benefits that can be achieved from it.

(6) You sound like a Ferengi.

[6] Our understanding of profits is a bit different from theirs, but I shall take no offense.

spent between

the two Cardassias

Eria was ready

for the final stage

of her dutiful life. (1)

(1) This is something I have noticed throughout the whole poem that surprises me: some stanzas are way shorter than others.

[1] Well, Doctor, it’s a way to keep the readers entertained, I would say. You know how it is, adding some spice to a monotonous life…

(1) I definitely do know that. Sometimes the spice tastes like yamok sauce.

[1] And sometimes like garam masala.

of her people,

Eria Jok the Explorer

more exploration

wanted in her life.

She approached Central Command

with the newest proposal

she would make:

“Hear me, my friends,

my allies, my enemies,

my foes, (1)

for our colonies are plentiful

and our enemies are few.

I ask, once more,

one small mercy that you grant.

Space is vast

and our glory infinite.

Allow me to take my vessel

and other worlds to explore.

I wish to live my last years

spreading our glory

far from home”. (2)

The request was considered

and granted,

as it was believed

Eria Jok’s duty to be

(1) There’s something in this phrase that I just… I don’t know; it drives me wild.

[1] Oh, believe me, I know. Why do you think I was using it so much the other day?

(2) I wonder if these other worlds included Bajor?

[2] No, Doctor, this poem is set about 150 years before the Cardassian occupation of Bajor. But of course, this is the beginning of the Empire, so it is indeed the start of the most glorious period in our history.

(2) Oh, Garak, sometimes your hyper-patriotism to Cardassia surprises me. I think we never had that kind of feeling towards Earth—probably because of all the nationalism related to specific countries, and then I think our alliance is more towards the Federation as a whole.

[2] It is a pity, then, that you cannot feel such a wonderful feeling of belonging.

(2) But I do, Garak, only not towards Earth.

[2] Towards Terok Nor?

(2) Towards a specific tailor-shop, and its tailor.

[2] What a coincidence! It seems my allegiance towards Cardassia is only surpassed by my allegiance towards a specific doctor. Funny, isn’t it?

VII. Eria’s life was full and plentiful,

and with her fearless crew

many worlds the Cardassian

rule finally knew. (1)

It was the end of Eria’s life

but it was the beginning of something new:

the Cardassian Empire was born

just as Eria was welcomed

(1) Accidental rhyme?

[1] Exactly. In the original Cardassian it does not rhyme. It would be quite distasteful.

(2) So, do you think she died without offspring and that is why the house of Jok can no longer be traced?

[2] It is an intriguing proposition. We certainly could not tell from what is written, could we, Doctor?

(2) How very Cardassian of you. Don’t you even want to try to conjecture?

[2] I prefer to spend my energy conjecturing other things.

(2) Oh, really? For instance?

[2] Now, Doctor, what would be the fun in telling you?

(2) Hmm, well, if you come back to bed, you’ll be able to see that I can spend my energy on some secret matters as well.

[2] Now you’ve got my attention. I shall indeed accept your proposition so I can investigate what secret matters you hide from me there.

CODICIL BY THE AUTHOR

This was the history

of Glorious Cardassia

and its dutiful

citizens.

If things were not as told

then the author urges

the Order to do as appropriate

with his life.

For truth is a valued ally

and lies have no place

in glory. (1)

(1) I don’t know what to say, Garak. The experience of reading this poem with your guidance has definitely been a much better experience than when I read it by myself. Your comments have made me understand Cardassians and Cardassia in a much more comprehensive way. Not to mention getting to understand you in a much more comprehensive way. I think life would have been very different if you hadn’t decided to annotate this poem, so I wanted to sincerely thank you for truly changing my life.

[1] Oh, Doctor, I have already told you this, bus sometimes your words render me speechless. I must confess my life has indeed improved since I made that decision. In fact, I shall also allow you an inkling of my inner life by confessing that I now feel a bit empty without anything to annotate. It was something that became part of my routine. And something that made me connected to you. Other than our… more personal activities.

(1) Garak! Then we must continue doing this! It’s only fair that we comment an Earth book next. What do you say?

[1] Well, my dearest Doctor, I shall wait with anticipation your selection of human literature. I am sure it will give us plenty of things to discuss. And plenty of things to look forward to.

(1) Isn’t literature just the best thing in the world?

[1] The second-best, I would argue.