Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

wen xiao jie ↦
bad news

↤ zhuo yichen
?

wen xiao jie ↦
guess whose ex is back in town

↤ zhuo yichen
Are you fucking
Goddammit.

zhuo小zhuo
:|

gongying bai jiu daren
AGAIN???
BRO
im about to crash out
you cant be serious

PSJ
Wait, are you sure?

zhuo小zhuo
Yeah
Wen xiao told me

xiaoxiao
i saw it in the firm’s booking portal :/

ying lei!
dude

zhuo小zhuo
I know

PSJ
What do we do?

xiaoxiao
well, nothing
except we have to be sure not to mention it or bring it up in any way

ying lei!
how can we know that’ll even work
as far as i’m concerned xiao zhao’s dick is like a homing pigeon any time that man is within 100 miles of him

PSJ
There are minors in this chat.

ying lei!
as far as i’m concerned xiao zhao’s nose can sniff out that man like a shark can sniff out blood in the water

gongying bai jiu daren
its okay i read webcomics lol

zhuo小zhuo
What

PSJ
Ying Lei’s right. Even if we don’t say a word, doesn’t he always just contact Zhao Yuanzhou directly?

xiaoxiao
he said he blocked his number after last time

zhuo小zhuo
I’m not sure i believe that
Maybe he did for a few days, but he’s fucking hopeless
I’ve seen with my own eyes a text come in when he was showing me a video from some unknown number but he was way too hasty with his swipe to get rid of the notification

ying lei!
maybe it was one of his crime friends

xiaoxiao
already??

zhuo小zhuo
No no this was like three fights ago after breakup 296
And no it was not one of his crime friends
The text said nothing but “In town if you’re free tonight” and nothing else
And where was he that night? gone
Couldn’t tell you where the fuck he went and didn’t get back till afternoon the next day

PSJ
I thought he went back to Macau.
For “offshore trading.”

xiaoxiao
regardless of where he went, the problem is he’s here, and given how bad their last fight was, i’m not sure xiao zhao should know
if he comes looking, we can just tell him he’s gone on business

ying lei!
wait it was bad?

zhuo小zhuo
Yeah
Sorry i only told wen xiao jie about it. it didn’t feel right to air out his business even though this shit annoys me so bad

xiaoxiao
♥♥ you were just looking out for him!!

zhuo小zhuo
No

PSJ
I suggest we go with Wen Xiao’s idea. Lie if he comes looking.
Also, make Zhao Yuanzhou share his location with one of you.

zhuo小zhuo
Lol he will never agree to that. it’s fine, i’ll just work from home more for the next few weeks and be pushy about asking him where he’s going at night.
One of you borrow his car so he can’t take mine. he hates driving stick
Maybe we need to plan some stuff for the weekends so he’s distracted?

ying lei!
OOOH
can i host a dinner party

zhuo小zhuo
You can host an orgy for all i care. anything to keep him away from that dickhead

ying lei!
YEEESSSSS
i’ll create an event in the groupchat

PSJ
Minors, Xiao Chen.

zhuo小zhuo
Wait speaking of xiao jiu. what do you mean you ‘read webcomics’?
What are you reading
BAI JIU

pei jiejie ♥ ↦
When Xiao Jiu says “crash out,” what does that mean?

↤ Wen Xiao from Zhuo & Baize LLP
i’ll be honest with you, i have no clue
just looked it up and i think it means something along the lines of ‘i’m going to lose my mind,’ to be used in a situation that upsets you greatly
that’s my guess!

pei jiejie ♥ ↦
I see…
Did you ever figure out what “Skibidi” was?

ying lei! has scheduled an event: Dinner Party This Weekend!

ying lei!
everyone pull up!!!! dressing up is encouraged
and don’t worry about the time just come whenever after noon, i’ll probably be cooking until around 5 or 6

xiaoxiao
do we have a dress up theme?
i want to do 20s!!
actually, i just wanted to wear this green qipao i haven’t had a chance to wear…

zhao大哥
wear it regardless you look gorgeous in it
anyway fuck yeah i’ll be there ying lei
what’s the occasion??

ying lei
just wanted to test some new recipes on you guys…
:3

PSJ
Cool. I’ll be there.
Let me know if you need a ride from campus, @gongying bai jiu daren.

zhuo小zhuo
Do you also want us to bring foof
Food*

zhao大哥
foof

ying lei!
foof

xiaoxiao
foof

gongying bai jiu daren
foof

PSJ
Foof

zhuo小zhuo
Fuck you for real zhao yuanzhou

zhao大哥
promise?

zhuo小zhuo
Kill yourself

gongying bai jiu daren
ya @PSJ
三Q

ying lei!
no need to bring food @zhuo小zhuo
but @PSJ you should bring your brother!
he’s the only one who’s any good at mario kart

zhao大哥
i’m sorry that i’m literally a lawyer who eats while he’s driving

zhuo小zhuo
Yeah but you’re like
Really ass at mario kart

zhao大哥
11:19 PM in 2 days

zhuo小zhuo
What
What the fuck did you just do
BITCH?
DID YOU JUST CURSE ME?

ying lei
hold on before i lose you guys can everyone check this list of your food allergies
and let me know if anything’s changed
[IMG_2923.jpg]

PSJ
Looks right, still nothing for me. Thanks.

xiaoxiao
pei jiejie and her stomach of steel ♥
nothing for me either! thanks ying lei

zhuo小zhuo
I don’t have allergies. my histamines are only robust when called upon. unless you count zhao yuanzhou

zhao大哥
so close! that is cannibalism

ying lei!
everyone can eat onions garlic cilantro and spice right

gongying ba jiu daren
ya

ying lei!
okay good

zhuo小zhuo
Moderate spice if possible

zhao大哥
weak ass

wen xiao jie ↦
any sign he knows?

↤ zhuo yichen
Don’t think so. hasn’t left his desk all night
Still bent over his case book and hasn’t looked at his phone either. heard him on calls but they were definitely work

wen xiao jie ↦
that’s good
ugh i can’t believe i’m this nervous
this isn’t even my ex
maybe i’m being too nosy, but that last fight they had was so upsetting. i can’t keep watching him do this to himself
he’s smart about everything except this!!

↤ zhuo yichen
Because he’s a fucking idiot lol
Except i can’t even say that to him because then he won’t say shit to us ever again. though i’m pretty sure he knows exactly how i feel

wen xiao jie ↦
yeah…

↤ zhuo yichen
Feel like i need to remind pei sijing of that sometimes. if she ever meets him again she might actually kill him

wen xiao jie ↦
and she’d be right!
but yeah, i know. the others don’t know everything right?

↤ zhuo yichen
Nope
Not the growing up together part
Definitely don’t know about the hospital stay and the bill payout. or the flowers on his birthday
Pei sijing might know about the plus one thing at zhao wan’er’s wedding just because of the old pictures in the office but she’s never brought it up
Xiao jiu hasn’t even seen the guy. he just knows his zhao da-ge refuses to own a single umbrella for dumbfuck reasons

wen xiao jie ↦
he gets sick every single winter because of it
drives me insane

↤ zhuo yichen
Why are we friends with him

wen xiao jie ↦
because he saved zhuo & baize llp and gave you a place in this city after your family was disgraced

↤ zhuo yichen
Uuuggghhhh

wen xiao jie ↦
♥

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
In town for the month
Have you been well?

↤ Zhu Yan
li lun?
hey
i’ve been great.

Chapter Text

ying lei!
thanks everyone for coming!!
and enjoy your leftovers. hehe
xiao zhuo you forgot your lactaid here btw

xiaoxiao
i can get it for him after work!

PSJ
Thanks for hosting, Ying Lei. Send me the recipe for those salted egg chicken wings when you get a chance. A-Heng and I both loved them.

ying lei!
yesssss
that was my first time making those
check your texts for recipe

zhuo小zhuo
Fuck i knew i forgot them. had to pass on the group milk tea order because of it
Yeah thanks ying lei. food was great

xiaoxiao
don’t you mean foof?

zhuo小zhuo
Fuck you zhao yuanzhou
Oh
Sure, foof
Yeah wait where is zhao yuanzhou? why didn’t he come in here with some smartass comment about my lactaid

gongying ba jiu daren
gulu gulu

zhuo小zhuo
Stop

PSJ
I think he’s driving.

zhuo小zhuo
…To where

PSJ
I’m not sure, he didn’t say.
He left early, though.
Oh.

PSJ
Fuck.
I’m sorry. I got pulled into a call.
I know I was supposed to have eyes on him while you guys met with Tianxiang Group.

zhuo小zhuo
Ugh
No it’s not your fault. work can’t stop just because zhao yuanzhou would hemorrhage and die if he made a good decision
Guess he didn’t block that asshole’s number after all

ying lei!
how is he leaving early when there’s a case out with tianxiang group
isn’t that kind of a big deal right now

xiaoxiao
can’t say much about it
yes, but zhao yuanzhou’s only tangentially involved
they didn’t want him on the team because he’s a loose cannon

zhuo小zhuo
Heartbreaking: worst people you know made a good point
Should i call him and
Idk fake an emergency

gongying ba jiu daren
if youre not squeamish about blood you can can try cutting yourself open on a knife
just dont bleed out
i can do da stitches

zhuo小zhuo
That would be a real emergency

gongying ba jiu daren
o ya

PSJ
Say you guys had a break-in?

zhuo小zhuo
Oh hsit
Shit
Yeah maybe

xiaoxiao
system says he clocked out an hour ago :(

zhuo小zhuo
You gotta be fffffffucking kidding me
Whatever he can ruin his life i don’t care

ying lei!
well at least he’ll be gone at the end of the week

xiaoxiao
he’s here for a month
://

PSJ
Jesus.

zhuo小zhuo
A MONTH??????///
I think we need to kill him

PSJ
I think we need to give him a lobotomy.
Either one of them.

ying lei!
i got one of those at claire’s

gongying bai jiu daren
omg me too

zhuo小zhuo
??
The earring store?

xiaoxiao
maybe it’ll be okay? like what if he’s here for a month because he’s trying to set things right?
because, yeah, he’s usually only here for a week, two at most
what if we’re meddling in stuff we shouldn’t be?

zhuo小zhuo
Because zhao yuanzhou is so good at minding his own business
I met the guy because he’s pathologically unable to

PSJ
You’re too kind, Wen Xiao.
And we work in law.

xiaoxiao
:(

PSJ
It’s a good thing.
Then do we actually just do nothing?

zhuo小zhuo
For now i guess. what is there TO do short of throwing ourselves in front of his car

gongying bai jiu daren
i volunteer

zhuo小zhuo
No. go study for your finals

zhao大哥
i’m in midtown
does anyone want anything from the shihlin?

xiaoxiao
oooh!
@PSJ do you want to share an XXL crispy chicken

PSJ
Sure.
Thanks.

xiaoxiao
yay!

zhuo小zhuo
Why are you in midtown. just wondering

zhao大哥
offsite meeting

zhuo小zhuo
Okay

zhao大哥
……..okay
do you want anything. ya fuckin weirdo

zhuo小zhuo
No
Well
Wintermelon tea
Thanks

zhao大哥
cool
be back home in an hour

chou xiaozi ↦
im not actually gonna throw myself in front of a car dw
for now
also tianxiang groups news article just dropped
drip was fire

zhuo yichen ↦
What is drip

↤ wen xiao jie
outfit

zhuo yichen ↦
Thanks

↤ yichen哥
Thanks
Your drip isn’t too bad yourself

chou xiaozi ↦
never say that again

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Did you get home

↤ Zhu Yan
Hi! I’m currently driving and will answer your message as soon as I can. Please text URGENT if you have an emergency.

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
URGENT
Did you get home

↤ Zhu Yan
love i’m driving
but yes almost, parking actually

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Okay good
Sorry

↤ Zhu Yan
when can i see you again?

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Whenever
Tomorrow if you want

↤ Zhu Yan
same time?
or do you have work

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
I can do same time
Dinner?

↤ Zhu Yan
yeah let’s do dinner
you pick

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Okay
I miss you

pei sijing jie ↦
Can I ask a question about Li Lun?
Feel free not to answer if you don’t feel comfortable.

↤ xiao zhuo
I am ready to talk shit about that man at all times ask me anything

pei sijing jie ↦
I’m happy to keep doing this for however long it takes, so don’t take this the wrong way.
But Wen Xiao clearly is putting a lot of thought to this.
I don’t really understand why?
She doesn’t put up with any bullshit, yet everything I know about Li Lun is that he’s a walking, talking disaster and leaves Xiao Zhao in tears twice a year at least.
Why do we continue putting up with his shit?

↤ xiao zhuo
Lol
Do you want the short story or the long story

pei sijing jie ↦
Both, I guess.

↤ xiao zhuo
Short story is that zhao yuanzhou grew up with this man, and even though he’s a dickhead he’s bailed us out of trouble twice
Both times when chongwu associates tried to sue us for filth
Not because he gives a shit about us, but because he saw how upset it made zhao yuanzhou
So he settled it externally
With his “offshore trading”

pei sijing jie ↦
Huh.
I didn’t realize.

↤ xiao zhuo
We don’t mention it. it was legal but it looks too much like a hush money deal
Z&BZ LLP did nothing wrong but we just know chongwu would spin it if we spoke on it more than we had to

pei sijing jie ↦
I understand. I’ll keep it to myself.
What’s the long story?

↤ xiao zhuo
Let me get my laptop for this

↤ xiao zhuo
Okay well
The long story is that yeah they grew up together. they were born in a really superstitious town at the same time under an inauspicious star so they were both given up to an orphanage

pei sijing jie ↦
Wen Xiao said he told her they met when Li Lun hit him with his car.

↤ xiao zhuo
Yeah he’s never told the same story twice
Annoying ass mf
You should ask ying lei what he got

pei sijing jie ↦
…

↤ xiao zhuo
Anyway regardless of how and exactly when they met they’ve definitely known each other for years. so the childhood thing is not a lie
I don’t know if you remember this because you were new to z&bz at the time but a couple years ago zhao yuanzhou collapsed at a client dinner from overwork. none of us were there so we didn’t know, it was just him and the client
Which we were only made aware later was a partner with chongwu. jixin family law group. and he wouldn’t tell us anything but wen xiao and i honestly think he might’ve been poisoned
Not sure obviously just a hunch
Thanks hipaa
But yeah it was bad. no idea who told li lun about it but when he heard he got on a plane from macau that day and flew 15 hours to come see him
The bill for that visit was fucking crazy because they called an ambulance. which z&bz was ready to pay but when we got the bill it was $0 because li lun had paid it
And then jixin family law group just happened to get exposed for a massive attorney corruption ring a month later and crumbled

pei sijing jie ↦
That’s crazy.

↤ xiao zhuo
Yeah lol
Wen xiao was the first to go visit zhao yuanzhou in the hospital when she got the news so she ran into li lun there. said he looked like hell

pei sijing jie ↦
A fifteen hour flight will do that you.

↤ xiao zhuo
He flies first class lol
Please

pei sijing jie ↦
Killing him is back on.

↤ xiao zhuo
Obviously you have my support
Anyway zhao yuanzhou woke up when she was there and he asked if anyone else had come
Li lun’d just left to go get food
This is corny as hell. but it was like he just knew
Sorry i have the ick right now
He kept looking out the door of his room and wen xiao finally told him that li lun had been there and if he wanted her to go fetch him but he just didn’t say anything
Vom. vom vom vom vom

pei sijing jie ↦
And because of that, Wen Xiao tolerates him?

↤ xiao zhuo
Yeah
Like
I don’t think either of us will ever know what they really have but she said zhao yuanzhou just kept staring at that door with tears in his eyes

pei sijing jie ↦
Vom.

↤ xiao zhuo
Fucking tell me about it
But clearly that’s a kind of care and l*ve none of us will ever understand so
We tolerate it because we tolerate him

pei sijing jie ↦
I supposed that makes sense. I don’t like it, but it does.
What happened, though?
If they were childhood friends. Why are they like this now?

↤ xiao zhuo
As always not sure
But wen xiao and i pieced together that it was some kind of accident. a bad one
They were fighting in a stairwell because of a disagreement of how to work around law or whatever. trying to grab something out of each other’s hands
And li lun fell backwards down the flight of stairs

pei sijing jie ↦
Oh, shit.

↤ xiao zhuo
Broke his back and his leg
Zhao yuanzhou said it was a miracle he wasn’t paralyzed

pei sijing jie ↦
It takes so little.

↤ xiao zhuo
So
Yeah. lol that’s the story
Or as much as we know about it

pei sijing jie ↦
Thanks for telling me.
I still don’t like it, but I guess I understand. Not that I like that, either.

↤ xiao zhuo
Lol
You and wen xiao are more alike than not
She said the same thing. “hatred is borne of misunderstanding” as if we don’t work in law

pei sijing jie ↦
She is too kind. I tell her that every week.

↤ xiao zhuo
Yeah
Oaky i gotta go shower
Okay*

pei sijing jie ↦
Oaky

↤ xiao zhuo
Shut up

jingjing ↦
How did Zhao Yuanzhou tell you that he met Li Lun?
Out of curiosity.

↤ Sous Chef Ying Lei
hahaha
did he give you some crazy story too
he told me they met at a blood drive because they dropped a full bag of his blood and it exploded all over li lun’s clothes
and zhao yuanzhou was so mortified he let li lun go to his house and shower immediately

jingjing ↦
There is no way.

↤ Sous Chef Ying Lei
i dunno
i thought it was romantic

jingjing ↦
When you say you got a lobotomy at Claire’s, I believe it.

zhuo yichen ↦
Do you guys have foundation

↤ pei sijing jie
For you?

↤ wen xiao jie
i do!
i have two shades
and concealer

zhuo yichen ↦
No lol not for me
For zhao yuanzhou

↤ pei sijing jie
…

↤ wen xiao jie
i will not ask
i left them outside your door
with a makeup brush
which can be used to stipple over and cover…large areas…

zhuo yichen ↦
That’s all you need to say thanks.

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Hey
Are you gonna make it?
Tried calling but you didn’t pick up
I guess you’re not driving either

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Zhu Yan

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Are you not coming?

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
I left
Why didn’t you say anything if you couldn’t come?
Give me a call if you can

↤ Zhu Yan
fuck oh my god
i’m so sorry
! Your message was not delivered

Chapter Text

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
are you asleep

↤ 咱家xiao chen
??

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
no just text me. if i wanted to talk to you face to face i would have crossed the hall and knocked on your door
why are you awake at 2 am anyway

↤ 咱家xiao chen
You woke me up you fuckwad

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
you don’t put your phone on silent at night?

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Of course i put my phone on silent at night
Like a sane person

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
you sly dog do you have my contact set to notify you by ringtone anyway
weird way to propose but i do

↤ 咱家xiao chen
I’m going back to sleep

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
wait
sorry

↤ 咱家xiao chen
WHAT DO YOU WANT.

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
i can hear you making tea. can i have some
sorry i had a point to this i promise

↤ 咱家xiao chen
You’ve been typing for ages can you get to the point

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
conversation is such a lost art
actually i ordered takeout but i’m realizing i probably got too much
did you want to share with me

↤ 咱家xiao chen
It’s two am

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
okay and?
i didn’t eat dinner! i’m hungry!

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Why didn’t you eat dinner
I thought you left early again because you had another offsite meeting for the ran yi case
I can see the light under your door have you not slept this whole time?

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
i might’ve had a nap on my desk

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Okay.

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
are you mad
also is that a no to splitting dinner

↤ 咱家xiao chen
“Are you mad” i hate you so much
I don’t eat after 8 pm it gives me acid reflux

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
are you eighty fucking years old

↤ 咱家xiao chen
I would say kill yourself but honestly you don’t even need the reminder
Why didn’t you eat dinner. where did you even go after you left the office?
Wen xiao said you clocked out at 4pm again

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
what
she’s not even hr
something came up in the ran yi case and i got pulled aside. the dinner was going to be for the cheng huang case but i had to cancel.

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Fine
I guess if you were working i won’t say anything
But can you please eat at normal human hours because if wen xiao knew you were doing this again she would be really upset
And you don’t have to work cases alone. that’s what xiao jie is there for. that’s why we even hired pei jie
You don’t have to give a fuck what i think but at least think about them

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
i always care what you think xiao chen!

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Hm
You have a weird way of showing it

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
well except when it comes to spice
if i wanted to eat like a monk i would have joined a monastery

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Harrowing to imagine you bald

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
chilling right

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Extremely
Well your food is here. i left it in the kitchen

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
i really can’t interest you in a shared meal?

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Don’t worry i already ate your egg tart

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
that’s my boy

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Good night

ying lei!
YOU GUYS
sorry caps
rush got too crazy last night for me to report but li lun showed up at the restaurant
i thought there was no way it was him when i saw the reservation but it was him

xiaoxiao
oh my god
who was he with?

ying lei!
i dunno
reservation was for two but he just sat there by himself for two hours and then left
actually it was kind of sad
i felt bad for him a little
just a little though

PSJ
He deserves it.

ying lei!
well
i felt reaaaallllyyyyy bad.
like really bad
being alone in a nice restaurant surrounded by people with their friends and families is a particular kind of pain
i sent one of the servers out to give him a free ice cream
T _ T

PSJ
“Just a little.” “Really bad.”
You’re also too kind, Ying Lei.
Maybe he was waiting for Xiao Zhao.

gongying bai jiu daren
in his sadboi era
i bet he listens to joji

PSJ
Who is Joji?

gongying bai jiu daren
YOU DONT KNOW WHO JOJI IS

xiaoxiao
and he just…left? after two hours?

ying lei!
yeah
looked at his phone the whole time and didn’t even eat the ice cream
it was house-churned black sesame and cardamom!!!!!!

gongying bai jiu daren
i wouldve eaten it

ying lei!
thank you xiao jiu
T _ T

zhuo小zhuo
Lol
He was waiting for zhao yuanzhou

xiaoxiao
he told you?

zhuo小zhuo
No but now it makes sense
He said he didn’t eat dinner even though he left the office early again and then ordered takeout at 2 am last night
He got all shifty about it but he’s doing that fucking thing again where the second li lun is in town he starts working like the universe is about to experience its heat death any second
Got caught up working either the ran yi or cheng huang cases but he must’ve lost track of time and stood li lun up

xiaoxiao
:(
not again

zhuo小zhuo
I yelled at him already

ying lei!
maybe we should talk to xiao zhao!
we don’t have to say we know anything
how about you guys transfer one of his cases to someone else at the firm?

xiaoxiao
i tried that once, hoping it would work
it just made him so neurotic that xiao zhuo lived with me and pei jiejie until we gave him more work
aaaaahhhhh
:(

zhuo小zhuo
Don’t worry about it xiao jie

xiaoxiao
too late :(

zhuo小zhuo
I mean don’t worry more about it
I’ll deal with him
I’ll look into why he’s here for a month because yeah it is weird
And if we’re gonna have to endure his miasmic presence in this city then i sure as shit want to know why

PSJ
And how do you plan to do that?

zhuo小zhuo
Lol this isn’t end-to-end encrypted but
We’re z&bz llp
And he’s a corporate career criminal
It won’t exactly be hard

ying lei!
you’re so hot when you do that

zhuo小zhuo
Okay

PSJ
Please be careful.
If he’s bailed Z&BZ out of trouble, then he’s perfectly capable of putting us in the ground.

zhuo小zhuo
I’ll be careful

Zhu Yan ↦
i’m sorry
i’m really sorry
you don’t have to forgive me, and this isn’t an excuse, but i got caught up in casework and lost track of time.
if you’re free tonight i’ll treat!

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
It’s fine
I’m busy

Zhu Yan ↦
i really am sorry

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
You always are
And then what
We’re always this
Sorry and broken and sorry and broken

Zhu Yan ↦
i didn’t mean it, i really didn’t
i’m trying to make amends

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
You are but you hurt me

Zhu Yan ↦
i know
i did, i know

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
You hurt me.

gongying bai jiu daren
update on the cunt

zhuo小zhuo
Where the fuck did you learn to speak like that
Oh

xiaoxiao
:/

PSJ
What’s the update, Bai Jiu?

gongying bai jiu daren
i think i met him lol

ying lei!
HUH?
HOW?

gongying bai jiu daren
im interning at the pharmacy remember
he just walked right up to the counter and gave me his name

zhuo小zhuo
And?

gongying bai jiu daren
and
first of all
howd zhao-ge BAG THAT BADDIE
second of all
hes on some crazy pain meds
lolol

xiaoxiao
pain meds?

gongying bai jiu daren
hipaa
but ya

ying lei!
why does he need pain meds?

gongying bai jiu daren
i bet he sells em lol
it was rly strong stuff

xiaoxiao
maybe not
xiao zhao told us that he had an accident a long time ago
that’s probably why
how is he by the way?

zhuo小zhuo
I don’t know
He went to the office early as hell today
He did eat dinner with me last night and seemed normal but idk

ying lei!
i don’t know how many more dinner parties i can plan without looking suspicious…

zhuo小zhuo
It’s not on you ying lei
Anyway it’s almost the holiday party at z&bz so that’ll occupy him weekend after next at least
Idk about this weekend

PSJ
I mean, if he’s meeting Li Lun on weekdays, it’s not like weekend distraction is really effective.

zhuo小zhuo
Uggghhhh
If i weren’t on the tianxiang case i would just force him to do casework with me every night so he wouldn’t do stupid shit

xiaoxiao
it’s not on you either, xiao zhuo
we’ll think of something
we always do

zhao大哥
friends, zhuo yichen, countrymen, i’m excited to report that the qing geng case is as of today closed

xiaoxiao
!!!!!!!!!!!
congrats!!!!!!
that’s great news

zhuo小zhuo
Gj

zhao大哥
thank you.

PSJ
We should get drinks.
Expense it to the company card.

zhao大哥
you know i would never say no to drinks

ying lei!
nooo i never finish in time for drinks

xiaoxiao
we can start later so you can come later ying lei ♥

zhuo小zhuo
If it starts after 10pm don’t even invite me

xiaoxiao
boo
are you eighty years old?

zhao大哥
that’s what i said!!

zhuo小zhuo
MY ACID REFLUX

xiaoxiao
i have tums
and pepcid for glow

zhao大哥
do you also have a pair of forceps tucked away in your pockets? a triage kit? an ekg, perhaps?

xiaoxiao
keep talking and you’ll find out!
:)

zhao大哥
ah… no…

ying lei!
YESSS
okay i’ll ask lu wu-shushu if i can take off an hour early
buttttt we’ll see

gongying bai jiu daren
can i come

zhuo小zhuo
No

PSJ
No.

zhao大哥
aren’t you literally twelve?

gongying bai jiu daren
i am in COLLEGE

zhao大哥
so twelve

ying lei!
you are coming in my heart bai jiu

gongying bai jiu daren
thanks nvm

wen xiao jie ↦
did you get back okay?

↤ zhuo yichen
Fucking
Yeah finally

wen xiao jie ↦
how is he?

↤ zhuo yichen
Bad
He’s in the shower right now

wen xiao jie ↦
i knew we shodulve made him eat more
i didn’t think he was gonna be drinkgingall that on an empty stomach
ooh man i’ms till a little tipsy

↤ zhuo yichen
Get some sleep
At least it’s friday tomorrow
Are you and pei jie okay

wen xiao jie ↦
yyeah we’re fine!
pei jiejie doesnt’ get drunk
she’s making me congyoubing ♥

↤ zhuo yichen
Good

wen xiao jie ↦
did he say naythign to you when you guys were int he bathroom?

↤ zhuo yichen
Yeah but nothing new
Just the same old
“It’s my fault i could’ve killed him i could’ve killed him”
Oh and something else gross which i will not be repeating on pain of death

wen xiao jie ↦
oaky i won’t make you
i can guess

↤ zhuo yichen
Yeah
I’ll only say this to you but
Poor fucker
I do feel bad for him sometimes
With the rarity of a passing comet but it happens

wen xiao jie ↦
:(
he’s so good at fighting for every stranger that comes to z&bz
but never for himself
good night

↤ zhuo yichen
night jie

咱家xiao chen ↦
Morning. i left tea for you on the counter and also rice in the microwave
Leftover chicken in the fridge if you want it

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
Hi! I’m currently driving and will answer your message as soon as I can. Please text URGENT if you have an emergency.

咱家xiao chen ↦
WHAT
URGENT
WHY ARE YOU ALREADY DRIVING?
IT’S 7 AM
WHEN DID YOU GET UP?

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
goodness xiao chen
preparing breakfast? for me?
you’re nicer than 99% of my lays

咱家xiao chen ↦
STOP DRIVING AND TEXTING
ALSO KILL YOURSELF

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
i’m at a stoplight

咱家xiao chen ↦
Why are you working already.

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
justice never sleeps

咱家xiao chen ↦
I hate you so much
See you in a bit

Bai Jiu from Situ University ↦
this is joji
listen to this and educate yourself
[YOUTUBE] Glimpse of Us - Joji

↤ pei 姐
This is pretty sad.

Bai Jiu from Situ University ↦
ya thats li lun

↤ pei 姐
Please don’t ruin a good song.

ying lei ↦
hmm
weird update
telling you first because i’m taking my fifteen right now and can’t answer everyone at once

↤ wen xiao the great and beautiful
oh no
weird how?

ying lei ↦
he’s back
li lun i mean
but not in the dining area he’s just parked outside the restaurant
and…xiao zhao is just passed out in the passenger seat beside him?
uhmmm

↤ wen xiao the great and beautiful
ohh.

ying lei ↦
idk like
he was just sitting there on his phone and at first i thought he like
i dunno
KILLED XIAO ZHAO? LOL
should i. i dunno they’re still parked there omg.
li lun’s also asleep now i’m sooooo so so confused.
it’s too dark for pics but i’m sure you believe me

↤ wen xiao the great and beautiful
it’s okay, ying lei
they’re okay but you were right to be alarmed

ying lei ↦
do
do they sleep in parking lots a lot

↤ wen xiao the great and beautiful
not exactly
but this has happened plenty before so you don’t need to worry, i promise

ying lei ↦
okay
my fifteen is up so i gotta go but good to know
thanks wen xiao jie

↤ wen xiao the great and beautiful
♥

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
I probably won’t be free for the rest of the week
It was good to see you tonight

↤ Zhu Yan
i fell asleep oh my god how can that be good

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
You came
And I needed it too
But you
Out like a log

↤ Zhu Yan
i really was starting to feel it
are you working the rest of this week?

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Something like that

↤ Zhu Yan
li lun

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Don’t
Not after tonight
You know what happens every time we start

↤ Zhu Yan
if you know then why do you keep coming back?
fuck i don’t mean - i just
i’m scared for you

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Funny
I ask myself that question all the time
Why do I keep coming back?

Chapter Text

zhuo小zhuo
So i have good news and bad news

xiaoxiao
good news!

PSJ
Bad news.
Oh. Go with what Wen Xiao wants.

zhuo小zhuo
Congratulations to everyone involved you will be getting both

PSJ
Weirdly, I’m not comforted.

zhuo小zhuo
Ha
Well the good news is that i couldn’t find any evidence that li lun is here to embezzle, defraud, or swindle any companies that i know of
Aka generally pharmaceuticals
The bad news is i otherwise can’t tell what he’s here for

xiaoxiao
is it stupid to hope…

zhuo小zhuo
Not when it’s you
I don’t know why this makes me more nervous
I’d rather he be here for racketeering and extortion and not for the sights views and vistas
Fear only when the lion who hunts and kills stands still with fear in its eyes or however the saying goes

PSJ
I’m at least 95% sure you just made that up.

gongying bai jiu daren
idc he sounded poetic
it’s giving du fu

zhuo小zhuo
What’s giving me du fu
What

ying lei!
i’d argue li lun is more like an eel
or a cockroach
fear only when the cockroach who survives flame and mold comes back with its head still intact

gongying bai jiu daren
cringe
common ying lei L

ying lei!
L what

xiaoxiao
so as far as we know, 1. li lun came here with no obvious plans for his job
2. is here for a month
3. picked up multiple prescriptions of strong pain meds
and 4. has somehow managed not to start a fight with xiao zhao in a week?

zhuo小zhuo
Yeah
It’s weird

ying lei!
i have to work soon but can someone explain what exactly it is they fight about every time
just send it all in here i’ll read it later

PSJ
I want to know too.
I always know exactly when that worm leaves town because Xiao Zhao comes in with red-rimmed eyes the next day.

zhuo小zhuo
Yeah lol but
Move it to the other chat
Sorry bai jiu no amount of webcomics makes you an adult

gongying bai jiu daren
this is ageism

zhuo小zhuo
this is child welfare policy

xiaoxiao
he says it’s not always the same fight
but it always goes something like this -

Lun子 ↦
My flight’s tomorrow

↤ Zhu Yan
oh!
do you need a ride? what time?
i’ll just sidle out of the office for a bit it won’t be a problem

Lun子 ↦
Never mind

↤ Zhu Yan
no i’ll drop you off!
how else will you get there? the rideshare dropoff is across the airport from the international terminal, it sucks

Lun子 ↦
I said never mind
It’s really early in the morning
Don’t bother

↤ Zhu Yan
it’s not a bother
why do you always say it like that?

Lun子 ↦
Clearly it is
Just stay where you are and keep serving the engine of justice

↤ Zhu Yan
why do you do this every time
i don’t understand
we made it through the entire week not doing this

Lun子 ↦
Yeah because we didn’t talk about it
You came over and we slept or we fucked or both

↤ Zhu Yan
god you’re so crass

Lun子 ↦
What do you want to call it
I’d love to know
I’m begging you, actually, to give me a reason to call it something else

↤ Zhu Yan
don’t change the subject

Lun子 ↦
Fine. I won’t talk about it
We won’t ever have to talk about it, because what happens when we do?
You, at the top of the stairs and me, watching my blood come out of me at the foot of them
Shouldn’t I be asking you why?
Why weren’t you there?

↤ Zhu Yan
i’m sorry
i couldn’t face you. i couldn’t and i was cowardly for it
i’ll be sorry forever

Lun子 ↦
“Why”
Unbelievable. The nerve really
I have questions for you too
Do you not have an abyssal hole in you that you have to skirt around every day
How have you just moved on with your life, like I was never in it
Why did you let go, Zhu Yan
You let go and you just watched
And then you didn’t talk to me for a year.

↤ Zhu Yan
i’m sorry
every time i see you i think
this time i’m going to apologize, this time i’ll make it right
but
let me call you

[OUTGOING CALL ↗ 00:0017]
[OUTGOING CALL ↗ 00:00:09]
[OUTGOING CALL ↗ 00:00:12]

↤ Zhu Yan
lunzi
lunzi

↤ Zhu Yan
have a safe flight home.

PSJ
Jesus fucking Christ.
When was this?

xiaoxiao
well, the accident was way before any of us had met xiao zhao
this particular fight was a few years back

zhuo小zhuo
And i will say
Obviously we fucking hate li lun.
Obviously if i see him jaywalking i’ll floor it
However
Fracturing your leg and your back because your friend watched as you fell backwards down a flight of stone stairs, and then never seeing them visit you, would also fuck me up for the rest of my life
God i hate zhao yuanzhou for making me defend his asshole ex
They deserve each other emituofo

xiaoxiao
not friends, they were dating at that point
which makes it worse! a little!
but then i remember that li lun called xiao zhao’s pursuit of law ‘pointless’ and told him to quit
and then i don’t know what to think.

PSJ
I had no idea. This is awful.
I agree, Xiao Zhuo.
I’m still no fan of him, but…

xiaoxiao
i learned this is why xiao zhao doesn’t own umbrellas

zhuo小zhuo
Wait what?
Why

xiaoxiao
he said it when he was drunk last week
i was saying sleet and snow would be coming soon and he just blurted it out
the bar was loud, so only i heard it
the thing they were trying to grab out of each other’s hands was an umbrella

zhuo小zhuo
Holy fuck?

xiaoxiao
it was when li lun first started getting involved in “offshore trading,” we’ll say
and xiao zhao, who was studying for the bar, was, of course, hesitant about it
this is why li lun says law is pointless, because once you go high enough, law stops existing. money becomes the law.
which often isn’t wrong, but xiao zhao didn’t want him doing it. you play with people high up, you play with your life
so li lun was storming out to his car, it was winter and raining, and xiao zhao grabbed the top end of the umbrella and tried yanking li lun back just as he was at the top of a flight of stairs
the nylon slipped right out of his hands, but li lun had been turning around
so he fell backwards into air…

zhuo小zhuo
Fucking
Hell

PSJ
I’m honestly impressed he’s not dead.
It takes so, so little.
No wonder you started tossing back shots at the end. It’s not like you to do that.

xiaoxiao
:(
thanks for making me congyoubing afterward ♥
he’ll never ever say it, but i think all of this is why he works the way he does. doing so many hours, multiple cases at once, not sleeping
the closest he ever got to letting anything slip was when director fan commented that he works like a man with ten mouths at home to feed
and xiao zhao replied “ten mouths are much easier to feed than one debt”

zhuo小zhuo
But li lun is fine now
This was years ago, right
Like he’s not suddenly dying of a rare sarcoma is he

xiaoxiao
not that i know of
but back injuries stay with you for life. i mean, it’s your back
and they’re not cheap things to heal
i think xiao zhao just has all his earnings stockpiled because he doesn’t know how else to fix what they have except to pay for the complications that are going to come later in li lun’s life

zhuo小zhuo
Man
I love being single

PSJ
It doesn’t sound like Li Lun needs his monetary help.
If he’s doing offshore trading, he’s probably swimming in cash.

ying lei!
oh my god i just backread on my fifteen
this is like ten million gazillion times worse than i was expecting

zhuo小zhuo
Yeah i didn’t know about the umbrella
Fuck

PSJ
It sounds like…
No, I don’t really know them well enough.

xiaoxiao
go ahead! you are safe here

PSJ
Am I crazy or is the answer glaringly obvious?
About what Li Lun wants.

zhuo小zhuo
And what is that
Save being a scourge upon our lives

PSJ
Well.
He wants Zhao Yuanzhou to stay.

zhuo小zhuo
Extremely cannot relate

PSJ
Haha.
Fair enough.
I don’t think it’s a totally incomprehensible desire, though. To want your person to stay.
I guess when all’s said and done, that’s all any of us really want.

pei 帅姐 ↦
By the way, I wanted to let you know that A-Heng was accepted into the fashion design program. He’s ecstatic and passes on his gratitude.
Thanks for your help. I owe you on his behalf.

↤ Zhao Yuanzhou from Zhuo & Baize LLP
i was wondering if he’d heard back! i’m so glad!!
this is great news. holy shit, made my whole day
wow tell him congrats
i knew he had it in him - when i passed his portfolio along to the department director she said he had a lot of promise, and she’s tight-lipped with her praise
and don’t even worry about it. what’s a favor between friends but an act of love

pei 帅姐 ↦
Dinner tomorrow’s on me.

↤ Zhao Yuanzhou from Zhuo & Baize LLP
whoa

pei 帅姐 ↦
What.
What, Zhao Yuanzhou.

↤ Zhao Yuanzhou from Zhuo & Baize LLP
shh let me just bask in this moment.
just got invited to dinner by pei shuaijie. an accomplishment that most chase their whole lives to fruitless results.
i need to go get my suit pressed

pei 帅姐 ↦
I will be revoking my invitation now.

↤ Zhao Yuanzhou from Zhuo & Baize LLP
can we go to cheesecake factory

pei 帅姐 ↦
Genuinely, what is wrong with you?

↤ Zhao Yuanzhou from Zhuo & Baize LLP
please
you’re treating, i’m requesting. so so so nicely i might add.
also you’re the only other person in our group that can eat anything
last time i invited xiao zhuo he asked me why i would invite him anywhere with cheese in the name. to which i was like, yeah actually not my brightest moment

pei 帅姐 ↦
We can go to Cheesecake Factory.
Please don’t wear a suit.

pei jiejie ♥ ↦
Got you the coconut cream pie cheesecake slice you wanted.

↤ Wen Xiao from Zhuo & Baize LLP
yay!

pei jiejie ♥ ↦
I’ll be honest with you, it looks denser than tungsten.
On my way back now so it’s en route.
What did you do for dinner?

↤ Wen Xiao from Zhuo & Baize LLP
it was just me and xiao zhuo! he cooked
now i’m making him show me his sad collection of ties for the holiday party
i might just make him borrow one of xiao zhao’s because this is tragic

pei jiejie ♥ ↦
Shit, I forgot about that.
When is it again?

↤ Wen Xiao from Zhuo & Baize LLP
next weekend!

pei jiejie ♥ ↦
I need to get a dress.
Or a suit.

↤ Wen Xiao from Zhuo & Baize LLP
what about the one you wore last year?
you look so good in that

pei jiejie ♥ ↦
It’s great, it just shows too much sideboob for a law firm’s annual holiday party.
Are plus ones allowed this year? I can put down Ying Lei again so he can come.

↤ Wen Xiao from Zhuo & Baize LLP
yeah, they’re allowed
you can borrow one of my dresses if you want
sadly i do not own suits and xiao zhuo’s slacks are definitely too long for you :(

pei jiejie ♥ ↦
You’re so cute.
No worries, I’ve wanted to get one for a while.
Maybe I’ll go look at suits this weekend if you want to come.

↤ Wen Xiao from Zhuo & Baize LLP
of course!!! ♥♥♥

Zhu Yan ↦
hope you’re doing okay
haven’t heard from you in a few days, i know you’re working
take care of yourself!

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
I’m fine
You have little energy as it is
Use it worrying about yourself

Zhu Yan ↦
god every time
why do you have to start

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
Go on
Say it, go on.

Zhu Yan ↦
okay. no
no, i’m sorry. i didn’t do it right then but i’m trying to do it right now.
i’m worried about you and i’m telling you i’m worried
you looked really pale last time i saw you, and you move slower than you used to
is everything okay?

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
Everything’s fine

Zhu Yan ↦
are you sure?

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
What would you even do if it’s not

Zhu Yan ↦
god i would HELP YOU
are you hurt? did someone hurt you?
is it because of your work, because…
you don’t even take your shirt off when we fuck

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
God who’s fucking crass now
Holy shit I’m fine can you please stop asking

Zhu Yan ↦
okay okay
i’ll stop
sorry. but the reminder to please take care of yourself stands
and i’ll see you when you’re free, i guess

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
I’ll see you
I miss you when I don’t and can’t say anything when I do

Zhu Yan ↦
what a match we are

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
That’s the answer to my question
Why I keep coming back

zhuo yichen ↦
Are you guys free this weekend
I’m gonna take zhao yuanzhou out because if he stays inside doing casework any longer i think he might start growing moss
Or have a psychotic break
Or both

↤ pei sijing jie
Wen Xiao and I are going shopping for the holiday party.
You two should come. The state of your ties, Xiao Zhuo.

zhuo yichen ↦
I can just borrow one from zhao yuanzhou
But even if not i don’t know if that’s a good idea. i need to take him to high-attention things where he can’t look at his phone
A movie or something

↤ wen xiao jie
you are so thoughtful!

zhuo yichen ↦
It’s for me not him
He’s driving me crazy

↤ wen xiao jie
did something else happen?

zhuo yichen ↦
Yes
Well not exactly. yes but no
He plays music every morning in the kitchen because it wakes him up but he’s stopped
Which is why i keep thinking he’s still at home but he’s actually already gone to the office

↤ pei sijing jie
That sounds like he should be driving you…less crazy?
If he’s making less noise?

zhuo yichen ↦
No it’s driving me crazy

↤ pei sijing jie
…right.

↤ wen xiao jie
i think a movie is a smart idea
xiao zhao likes scary things
and there’s a new holiday market in midtown, he’ll want to buy little gifts for the associates and paralegals. you should take him there!

zhuo yichen ↦
Okay
Yeah i’ll look it up

↤ wen xiao jie
yes! make a date out of it ♥

zhuo yichen ↦
I want to make so abundantly and inescapably clear
That i am not taking zhao yuanzhou out
On a DATE.

Chapter Text

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
thanks for the date!
i didn’t think you were a horror movie person btw. you did very well
you only grabbed me twice ♥

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Why are you texting me i’m in the living room

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
it’s date protocol
you say thank you afterwards

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Like a job interview?
That was not a date that was an intervention
I don’t have time for dates

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
yeah it shows

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Excuse me?

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
no, not like a job interview, like a decent person
babe when the check comes
you should at least pretend to grab for it
just for future reference

↤ 咱家xiao chen
But you make twice as much as i do

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
see this is why you are bitchless

↤ 咱家xiao chen
BITCH?

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
less yeah
just put those together
don’t wake me if you’re too scared to pee at night. you’re on your own

↤ 咱家xiao chen
As if you’re ever asleep by the time i get up to piss

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
i guess that’s true
think of all the soul-searching conversation you’d have missed out on

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Think of all the sleep i could have gotten

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
why are you literally geriatric serious question
do you fucking do tai chi in the park in the mornings too
should i start getting calcium pills for your osteoporosis

↤ 咱家xiao chen
When you die at forty then you will know

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
god wtf that means i still have eight years to go
tell wen xiao she is so beautiful and i love her and bai jiu to work hard

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Shan’t
Good night

咱家xiao chen ↦
You won’t die at forty you are god’s most annoying jester and we’ll have to endure you for the rest of our natural lives. btw

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
you’re awake!
did you see the woman in the hallway too, xiao zhuo?

咱家xiao chen ↦
CAN YOU FUCKING NOT

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
i thought i heard footsteps myself
i was brushing my teeth when i thought i saw something in the mirror but when i turned, there was no one there…
well since we’re both awake, tell me more how you’d sob over my cold body if i died
this is great for me

咱家xiao chen ↦
It is a miracle still unstudied by man how you are this annoying and yet have been allowed to live thirty-two undisturbed years

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
ha!
not quite undisturbed, but that’s sweet of you

咱家xiao chen ↦
Well
Fine. my point is

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
did the hallway woman get you?

咱家xiao chen ↦
Can you shut up i’m typing
You’re the most annoying person i’ve ever met and that i’ll ever meet but there’s a lot more to life after forty. you work like there isn’t and, sure, i don’t know what there is after forty either, but there’s a lot more people for you to meet and annoy. and bai jiu will probably be a necromancer at the point so even if you died he’d find a way to bring you back. i assume this will get his license taken away so don’t do that him. plus wen xiao would probably cry forever. and unfortunately chongwu associates are really only scared of you so actually in the morning i will be putting in writing that you are contractually forbidden from dying or else everything zhao wan’er worked to build will go to the shitter. also i still don’t know how to use the zojirushi rice cooker you got because why the fuck does a rice cooker need an oatmeal setting. it’s RICE. so you’re not allowed to die when you’re forty and if you do i’ll kill you

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
…wow

咱家xiao chen ↦
Shut the fuck up

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
all that because you made a joke that you make twenty times a day?
we need to get you on lexapro

咱家xiao chen ↦
Can you be serious for one second in your life ever or is that impossible for you like physiologically

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
okay okay
your worry is very thoughtful xiao zhuo. i am deeply moved.

咱家xiao chen ↦
That’s worse

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
you see why that doesn’t work

咱家xiao chen ↦
Yeah don’t do that again
I got chills that had nothing to do with hallway ghosts
Which don’t exist

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
i get it. you took me out today. i’m actually quite sharp, you know, we are all of us lawyers are we not
i appreciate you. serious.

咱家xiao chen ↦
Please make better choices
Also serious

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
don’t i always!

咱家xiao chen ↦
No
Almost never in fact

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
sigh
read for filth by a man that looks like a kewpie doll

咱家xiao chen ↦
What
I just googled that. what the fuck actually

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
[IMG_43720.jpg]
it’s the same picture

咱家xiao chen ↦
When the fuck did you take that
Where even were we

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
kbbq and it was when jingjing smacked your hand away from the grill so she could fry the meat
and you looked at her like that
god. priceless

咱家xiao chen ↦
I hate you so bad

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
i know babe. never stop

ying lei!
WOOHOOOO THANKS @PSJ FOR THE HOLIDAY PARTY INVITE
i just got the email
you’re the best T w T

PSJ
Of course.
There’ll be catering, and a lot of it, but if you have the time, please bring your peppermint and walnut brownies. A couple of the paralegals have already started asking if we'll have them again this year.

ying lei!
waooo i’m so honored!!
definitely those are easy
i’ll make one without nuts too

gongying bai jiu daren
@xiaoxiao thanks for the invite jiejie but unless someone can come get me late then i cant come
i have finals that day :c and zbz is far af from campus

xiaoxiao
no!!
@PSJ i can go get bai jiu if you want to drink during the party?

ying lei!
i can get him when i come from the restaurant, i’ll have to work lunch if i’m coming to the party
no worries

gongying bai jiu daren
thx lei-ge

ying lei!
anything for xiao jiu!

zhuo小zhuo
Party doesn’t start till 6 and usually goes to 10 every year, you’ll have time

zhao大哥
can’t wait to see everyone’s fits this year
if any of you guys need to borrow anything just let me know!

zhuo小zhuo
Tie

zhao大哥
you don’t even ask to borrow my pants i already know

gongying bai jiu daren
wouldnt your pants be shorts on yichen-ge

xiaoxiao
scream

zhao大哥
i beg your finest pardon?

zhuo小zhuo
read for filth by a toddler

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Feel like you would probably know this
Where’s a parking lot that doesn’t have security cameras pointed at it

↤ Zhu Yan
…why…are you asking

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
For work

↤ Zhu Yan
for WORK?
are you serious
what are you doing?
do you think we’re still eighteen. what do you think this is.

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
That’s not
God just answer the question

↤ Zhu Yan
absolutely not why do you need a parking lot without cameras
?? hello?
what are you DOING

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
To park in
I need a parking lot to park in is this really something I need to explain

↤ Zhu Yan
yes???
li lun i am not helping you get yourself killed. are you serious

↤ Zhu Yan
?????????????????

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Just for now I probably shouldn’t go back to my hotel
I just need a place to sleep for a few nights

↤ Zhu Yan
you’re joking

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
So do you know one?

↤ Zhu Yan
i am not
jesus fucking christ
where are you right now

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Work

↤ Zhu Yan
well leave work and go wait for me at the shihlin in midtown
i have a meeting for a case i need to be at but go park yourself there and don’t move i swear to god

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Why
You want me to come stay with you?

↤ Zhu Yan
well i’m not going to let you stay in a parking lot?? are you using your brain right now?
if you’re worried about a hotel room how is being in a car in a parking lot safer?

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Don’t you live with the most anxious fucking dweeb on the planet

↤ Zhu Yan
he’s alright
but yeah you should not let him know you’re there. he leaves for work around 8 but he’s home by 6.

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
It might put you at risk

↤ Zhu Yan
yet here i still am. go wait at the shihlin
christ

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Okay

↤ Zhu Yan
and get me an xxl crispy chicken

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Okay
Zhu Yan

↤ Zhu Yan
what

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Thank you

咱家xiao chen ↦
Hey was that you

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
yyyyyyye what do you mean

咱家xiao chen ↦
You don’t usually shower at night

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
are you freaking yourself out about the lady in the hallway again?

咱家xiao chen ↦
THERE IS NO LADY IN THE HALLWAY
FUCK YOU

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
yes that was me
i needed to think

咱家xiao chen ↦
Okay
Night

zhuo yichen ↦
GOOD MORNING.
ACTUALLY AWFUL MORNING.
LI LUN IS IN MY FUCKING HOUSE.

↤ pei sijing jie
What?
In your HOUSE?

↤ wen xiao jie
HUH?

Chapter Text

↤ pei sijing jie
Okay.
Not to be totally uncouth, but how do you know it wasn’t just some random lay?
You said yourself that he seems to be on the verge of a mental break. Maybe he took your advice and just brought someone back to unwind?

↤ wen xiao jie
did you see his face?

zhuo yichen ↦
No but i know it’s him
I just know
Like i just know the same way girls know their friends cycles

↤ pei sijing jie
Not how it works, but okay.
Elaborate.

zhuo yichen ↦
I hate that i know this but he is like super n*ce to his lays

↤ wen xiao jie
why are you censoring nice?

zhuo yichen ↦
The thought of it nauseates me

↤ wen xiao jie
right

zhuo yichen ↦
Like i always know when he’s had someone over because the light will be off under his door for once and then the kitchen smells like egg congee
Literally always. it’s like his big I Had Sex Last Night signal
And i never ever see the person it was they’re just gone. they were just the concept of a person
I absolutely saw a shape under the blankets when he was coming out of his room i SAW A HEAD poking out
But he just got ready as always this morning and then came to work. for all i know li lun is still in my house
And someone showered in the middle of the night last night. zhao yuanzhou is a morning showerer
That’s definitely not a random lay

↤ pei sijing jie
This is so much more information about Zhao Yuanzhou than I needed to know.

↤ wen xiao jie
you’ll get used to it
:’)
anyway xiao zhuo, do you want to confront him about it?

zhuo yichen ↦
God i fon’t fucking know
Don’t
Should i? if it’s just for one night maybe something came up
He’s never done it before which makes me think something happened

↤ wen xiao jie
pei jiejie says i’m too kind
but you are too ♥

zhuo yichen ↦
Ugh

↤ pei sijing jie
I don’t know. He should’ve at least given you a heads up.
Common courtesy.

zhuo yichen ↦
Well li lun isn’t exactly our favorite person he probably thought i’d say no
And didn’t bai jiu say something about him being on really strong pain meds
Maybe he’s sick

↤ wen xiao jie
why don’t you give it a few more days? if he still seems to be haunting your place, then bring it up to xiao zhao?
regardless of how we feel about li lun, xiao zhao always goes out of his way to look out for and take care of us. he wouldn’t be angry if you talked to him

zhuo yichen ↦
Yeah probably
We’ll see
Never date people the work is another whole job and you don’t even get paid

↤ wen xiao jie
but love is worth it!
♥

Sous Chef Ying Lei ↦
how many servings should i plan for the holiday party?

↤ jingjing
For brownies specifically?

Sous Chef Ying Lei ↦
aye

↤ jingjing
Hmm.
Can you swing 200?

Sous Chef Ying Lei ↦
aiyowei
yes i can

↤ jingjing
Is that too much?
Don’t worry about it if so. People won’t die if they don’t get free brownies.

Sous Chef Ying Lei ↦
there’s nothing i can’t swing
you can count on me

↤ jingjing
Thanks, Ying Lei.
I’ll be sure everyone knows you made them.

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
[IMG_7209.jpg]
Didn’t think you’d still have this

↤ Zhu Yan
are you still at my place?

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
No
Left hours ago after the dweeb did
Forgot about it until now

↤ Zhu Yan
and of course i do!
you made it for me yourself

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
I know
That’s why I’m surprised you still have it

↤ Zhu Yan
well
i still love you
Message send canceled

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Well what

↤ Zhu Yan
nothing

zhuo yichen ↦
I don’t think li lun is here but it’s early in the evening so maybe he’ll come later
Zhao yuanzhou’s still just working i can hear him on calls
I keep vacillating on whether i should say anything

↤ wen xiao jie
did they bother you at all last night?

zhuo yichen ↦
No i didn’t even know he was here
Only the shower was odd and if i hadn’t seen past zhao yuanzhou’s shoulder this morning i never would’ve known
For such a big person he’s noiseless
Kind of creepy

↤ wen xiao jie
hmm
maybe you can say it’s okay that he stays but at least ask why?
you live there too, you have a right to know

zhuo yichen ↦
Yeah
I’ll give it till this weekend

↤ wen xiao jie
the holiday party is this weekend!
surely with as much coming and going as we’ll be doing, he’ll be gone

zhuo yichen ↦
That’s what i’m thinking
And hoping
How many weeks has he been here

↤ wen xiao jie
two weeks
we’re going into the third week

zhuo yichen ↦
Two more to go then
Uggghghhhghggghh

↤ wen xiao jie
♥♥♥

Zhu Yan ↦
please know that i ask this with genuine worry
why are you on narcotics?

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
Why are you looking through my stuff

Zhu Yan ↦
you left it right on my nightstand
it’s kind of hard to miss a bottle that says oxycodone next to my lamp

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
Fuck
Well
Shit hurts all the time everywhere. If you must know

Zhu Yan ↦
is it your back?
if it’s bothering you again, i know some people who might be able to help
what’s wrong?

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
I have it handled
Don’t worry about it

Zhu Yan ↦
somehow a bottle of oxycodone is not exactly inspiring confidence in me that you have any of it handled

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
Just put it in my bag and out of your mind
Haven’t you done that with me for eleven years now?

Zhu Yan ↦
that’s not true
that’s never going to be true

wen xiao 美女 ↦
hellooo :)

↤ zhao yuanzhou
yes my beautiful sun queen

wen xiao 美女 ↦
are you still using my foundation and brush?
i was hoping to get them back for the holiday party

↤ zhao yuanzhou
oh no of course. shit, sorry, i totally forgot
yes i’ll bring them right over tonight

wen xiao 美女 ↦
thank you!!

gongying bai jiu daren
damn um did anyone figure out why li lun is here lolol
because i mightve

ying lei!
oh shit??

zhuo小zhuo
Whoa how

gongying bai jiu daren
came to the pharmacy again
he recognized me this time lol said it was impressive i was so young

zhuo小zhuo
Yeah because you’re twelve

gongying bai jiu daren
im SEVENTEEN you hag
ne way cant say what he got again obvi
but it was stuff you use before surgeries

xiaoxiao
surgeries…

PSJ
I guess that does make sense.
Damn, he must be in a lot of pain.

gongying bai jiu daren
he walks just fine
but thats probably those pain meds lol

xiaoxiao
li lun also doesn’t seem like someone who would admit he’s in pain even if it would save his life
because xiao zhao is the same way

zhuo小zhuo
Probably his back
Jesus that sucks
I threw it out once and it took weeks to feel right again

PSJ
Yeah, trying to lift a life-size replica of Kuromi in a pop-up cafe.
Reasons for which escape me to this day.

zhuo小zhuo
Why would you air me out like that

PSJ
It was funny.

zhuo小zhuo
I’m so glad my suffering entertains you

PSJ
It does, thank you.

ying lei!
does xiao zhao know?

zhuo小zhuo
He sure doesn’t seem like it
But i don’t pretend i know what goes on in his head

xiaoxiao
you understand him best of all of us!
you’re his best friend :)

zhuo小zhuo
Vom

Zhu Yan ↦
i’m not going to be home till way later tonight, the company holiday party ends at ten and i usually stay to help clean up
i left a key by my lamp if you want to get back in in the evening
just stay in my room and don’t leave it starting around ten

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
Okay
I’ll go back to my hotel after this weekend anyway
Thanks for letting me stay

Zhu Yan ↦
always
you can always stay

↤ +86 55-5555-5555
Ask me to

Zhu Yan ↦
to what?
stay?

xiaoxiao
[IMG_1115.jpg]
all ready for the party!! ♥

ying lei!
GORGEOUSSSSSSS

zhuo小zhuo
You look great as always jie

gongying bai jiu daren
ate cuntaminated food at the mother buffet and had explosive slayarrhea

ying lei!
.

xiaoxiao
D:

PSJ
WHAT?

zhao大哥
can you just say she looks nice.

zhuo小zhuo
How did you UNDERSTAND THAT??/

zhao大哥
i am always young and hip and with the youth
anyway wen xiao my beautiful lunar goddess you are nothing short of a vision

xiaoxiao
thank you everyone ♥ …and xiao jiu
[IMG_1116.jpg]
and pei jiejie looks sooooo handsome in her suit!!

zhao大哥
that dark green is so good on you!

PSJ
Thanks. Wen Xiao picked it out.

zhuo小zhuo
You guys are outshining us
[IMG_98022.jpg]

gongying bai jiu daren
you both look nice

zhao大哥
wow

gongying bai jiu daren
you told me to say that

zhao大哥
it stings somehow.

xiaoxiao
so so so handsome!!!!!!!!
xiao zhuo, you should let your hair down like that more often!

zhuo小zhuo
Ugh
Gets in my face
Thanks though

ying lei!
[IMG_1379.jpg]
i’m not cleaned up yet but 200 brownies are loaded up and ready to go
^-^
i’m gonna go home and change and then come get you bai jiu
how’d your final go

gongying bai jiu daren
killing myself

ying lei!
don’t do that, then you won’t be able to have my brownies

PSJ
You rock, Ying Lei. Can’t wait.
And I’m sure you did just fine, Xiao Jiu.

xiaoxiao
see everyone at the venue!!!

zhuo yichen ↦
Hhehy
Whoa that’s more champaeng than i though t
Ack. well you can figure it out
Have you seen zhao yuanzhou

↤ wen xiao jie
i think he took a call?
i saw him duck out with his phone a minute ago

zhuo yichen ↦
A call rihgt now? who the fuck
Well tlle him to hurry up because the partners want to take a group pic

jingjing ↦
Brownies are gone already.
They were a hit.

↤ Sous Chef Ying Lei
i’m so so so happy!
also the sign next to them was so cute!
thank you T w T

jingjing ↦
I thought you’d get a kick out of that.

zhuo yichen ↦
WHere are you
Did zhao yuanzhou ever cmoe back
Why are uyo both gone lol

↤ wen xiao jie
sorry cant talk driving

zhuo yichen ↦
Wait
What
Why
Where are you going
Wen xiao??????????

zhuo yichen ↦
Are you okay???????

↤ wen xiao jie
okay at a stoplight
going to the hospital we’re fine
xiao zhao got a call about li lun he’s in the er
driving him there

zhuo yichen ↦
Oh fuck

Chapter Text

[INCOMING CALL ↙ 00:00:29]
[INCOMING CALL ↙ 00:00:35]

zhuo yichen ↦
Hey gimme a call when you can
Pei jie and i are still in the venue parking lot lmk if you need us to come
Got your jacekt from the coat drop also. hope yuor’e not freezing?
Jacket*
You’re*

↤ wen xiao jie
not yet
hang on

zhuo yichen ↦
Okay

↤ wen xiao jie
you guys go home first!
i have my car
will explain later

zhuo yichen ↦
You sure?

↤ wen xiao jie
yes
xiao zhao’s with me
in bad shape but he’s around don’t worry!

zhuo yichen ↦
Okay

wen xiao jie ↦
:’(
man it’s late

↤ zhuo yichen
Hey everything okay
Pei jie’s staying at my place tonight she said she wants to be in the know if you text me at all
Where are you now?

wen xiao jie ↦
still in the hospital, in the waiting room now
i would call you but i don’t want to go stand outside in the dark alone :( i’m going to text
sorry if i’m slow

↤ zhuo yichen
Good good no stay with zhao yuanzhou
Are you cold?

wen xiao jie ↦
he gave me his jacket! i’m okay
phew
okay sorry i was quiet for so long there were some logistics issues that i was trying to help with

↤ zhuo yichen
Yeah what happened
Was the call zhao yuanzhou got about li lun?

wen xiao jie ↦
yeah
basically after you asked me where he was for photos i went looking and i found him in the corridor that goes toward the meeting rooms and hotel gym
i was about to leave when i saw that he had his hand on the wall? like he was going to faint
at first i just thought he was drunk and about to throw up so i went to him to see if he was okay
but then i heard him talking and he sounded completely sober
i couldn’t make out what he was saying because of the noise from the party, but he was talking fast, and his face was completely white
so i asked if everything was okay when he hung up, and he said no, li lun was in the er and they needed him to come in and give medical consent

↤ zhuo yichen
Whoa wait
Hold on
Why’d they call him

wen xiao jie ↦
that was the logistics thing
kind of
he’s listed as li lun’s spouse

↤ zhuo yichen
IS HE ACTUALLY?
LIKE LEGALLY??//

wen xiao jie ↦
no

↤ zhuo yichen
Oh
Okay well how is that legal

wen xiao jie ↦
are we really going to debate li lun’s legal merits

↤ zhuo yichen
No we are not
Sorry

wen xiao jie ↦
:’)

↤ zhuo yichen
Did zhao yuanzhou even know that himself

wen xiao jie ↦
also no

↤ zhuo yichen
Christ

wen xiao jie ↦
yeah
xiao jiu was right, actually
li lun is here for a surgery. it was scheduled for monday
this is all stuff xiao zhao told me - back when he first broke it, they stabilized and repaired the fracture with metal hardware, so li lun has screws in his spine
but over time one of them has gotten more and more misaligned and it’s pressing on one of his nerves
he’s here for realignment surgery, and that’s why he’s on strong pain meds

↤ zhuo yichen
Fuuuuuuck
God that sucks

wen xiao jie ↦
so what the hospital told xiao zhao is li lun drove himself to the er

↤ zhuo yichen
He drove hiMSELF?
What is wrong with him

wen xiao jie ↦
everything

↤ zhuo yichen
Yeah actually

wen xiao jie ↦
he came in saying the pain was overwhelming and the dosage of pain meds he was on was no longer helping before passing out on the floor
but they can’t do anything to him without medical consent, and so xiao zhao was the only person they could contact to ask if they could scan him and perform any emergency surgery if needed
but now we’re just waiting because xiao zhao doesn’t actually have clearance to authorize anything for li lun

↤ zhuo yichen
What why
Isn’t he listed as spouse
Who is more powerful than spouse

wen xiao jie ↦
well power of attorney

↤ zhuo yichen
Feel like i should’ve known that lol

wen xiao jie ↦
yes :’)
not in this case though
it’s because on li lun’s record he’s listed as zhu yan, not zhao yuanzhou, so his id doesn’t match
so they can basically only wait till li lun wakes up and gives consent himself to do anything

↤ zhuo yichen
Zhu yan??
His childhood nickname?

wen xiao jie ↦
:/
he kind of told me this in a jumble as we waited so this is what i understand
but that was his legal name before we knew him? about twelve years ago
you know how he said the accident li lun had was because they were fighting and li lun fell backwards down the stairs?

↤ zhuo yichen
Yeah

wen xiao jie ↦
so from what i could parse they were fighting about li lun getting involved in…illegal transport…of things…for some rough people
because the two of them were trying to set up something in medicine that would specifically fund research for childhood illnesses? disorders? not sure about this part, but it was philanthropic work for children. which is expensive
and it wasn’t going well, and xiao zhao was ready to give up
but li lun was adamant about it and he was going to get money from pretty much any avenue it took
even if it was illegal trading
“offshore trading” as we say now
and xiao zhao refused to do it, so li lun backed out, but like i said
rough groups, people you shouldn’t be messing with
if you know too much, which i guess li lun did, you become a liability
so when li lun backed out, they started looking for him

↤ zhuo yichen
Oh fuck?????

wen xiao jie ↦
yeah it…sounds all kinds of bad, to be honest
so without li lun knowing, xiao zhao began changing all the information on li lun’s accounts to his own information, under zhu yan
everything. his bday, ssn, description, all of it
so if anyone came looking, they’d find him
and then systematically he faked the documents to vanish that identity off the face of the earth
death, prison, missing person, all of those things
which is why he didn’t go see li lun for a year after the accident, in case anyone was watching them
didn’t want to run the risk of putting li lun in danger again
and that’s why he can’t let go, but also won’t let himself near li lun, i guess
aiyo…

↤ zhuo yichen
Oh my god…………
Lol i’m going to have to
Contact our carrier after this

wen xiao jie ↦
yes.

↤ zhuo yichen
Fuck i can’t wrap my head around this.
This is fucking crazy
Twelve years ago. which means a few years after that, he came to z&bz?
I wonder if zhao wan’er knew anything
So if li lun still has him listed as zhu yan does he not know?

wen xiao jie ↦
i don’t think he does
xiao zhao says he believes that li lun just thinks that he goes by ‘zhao yuanzhou’ for work
not that it’s his real legal identity now

↤ zhuo yichen
If it’s been this long is it still a risk?
Twelve years i mean how long does zhao yuanzhou plan to keep this up
Forever?

wen xiao jie ↦
li lun is probably dangerous enough in his own right now not to cross in crime circles anymore
he knows too many people
but you know xiao zhao
he still blames himself

↤ zhuo yichen
My head hurts
What the fuck

wen xiao jie ↦
mine too :(

↤ zhuo yichen
How’s he doing

wen xiao jie ↦
he’s had his head in his hands since he finished talking to me
so about an hour now

↤ zhuo yichen
You come back
I’ll go stay with his stupid ass

wen xiao jie ↦
what no
you had a lot to drink, you should get some sleep
come in the morning!

↤ zhuo yichen
It’s fine i sobered up in the shower
And it’s really late and you’re still in a dress
Call me and don’t hang up till you’re in your car on the way back
I’ll leave when you get to anshan park

wen xiao jie ↦
:’((
okay
you’re the best

[OUTGOING CALL ↗ 00:02:55]

zhao yuanzhou ↦
i am so so sorry for last night.
thank you. i feel like every time the world ends you’re there.
xiao chen said you got home safe, and i hope you slept well

↤ wen xiao 美女
morning! of course ♥
no need for sorrys or thank yous
are you okay? how is li lun?

zhao yuanzhou ↦
fine, just tired. xiao chen got me food
li lun woke up and they managed to talk to him and shift up his surgery to tomorrow morning instead of afternoon
he’s on as many painkillers as they can have him on without killing him or endangering the surgery, so he’s still out of it
i don’t think he has any idea who i am right now

↤ wen xiao 美女
that’s great news! glad he’ll be out of pain soon
and maybe not right now, but he’ll see that you’re there post-op :)
i’m sorry too. a little for him, but mostly for you
♥♥♥ we’re always here for you
me, xiao zhuo, pei jiejie, even ying lei and xiao jiu
you don’t have to do everything alone!

zhao yuanzhou ↦
i love you
i’ll try to remember that

↤ wen xiao 美女
i love you too!!
do i get a name today

zhao yuanzhou ↦
i love you my beautiful crossroads demon

↤ wen xiao 美女
:)) ♥
keep me updated

wen xiao jie ↦
are you working this morning?
i see you online

↤ zhuo yichen
Yeah i brought my laptop
Can you have hr put in a sick day for zhao yuanzhou

wen xiao jie ↦
sure!
is he okay?

↤ zhuo yichen
Ehh

wen xiao jie ↦
yeah…

↤ zhuo yichen
He drifts in and out of sleep but mostly just stares at the wall across the waiting room

zhao大哥
hey everyone. not sure how to say this but li lun’s in town and he’s in surgery today. long story, but complications with an old injury. i know i disappeared from the party and haven’t said anything all weekend, but i thought i should at least explain
sorry to leave you in the dark
i know you guys dislike him but i’m really scared and i hope he’s okay.

xiaoxiao
♥♥
i said this already, but you don’t have to do this alone

PSJ
Hope the surgery goes well.
I may not care for him, but you’re my friend, so I hope for your sake things turn out okay.

gongying bai jiu daren
o shit i was right
ya gl to him
hell be fine zhao-ge

zhuo小zhuo
Do you want the egg wrap or the chicken sandwich btw @zhao大哥
I’m at the downstairs cafe
And so you want medium or large coffee
Do*

zhao大哥
chicken and large please

zhuo小zhuo
Okay

ying lei!
modern medicine is very safe xiao zhao!! i’m sure the surgery will go smoothly and li lun will come out good as new
i was worried, i saw you step out of the party and thought something had gone wrong in a case

zhao大哥
thank you guys
i’m really really indebted to all of you and i don’t know how to make you guys understand how much i mean it
thank you

xiaoxiao
we love you!!

zhuo小zhuo
Please stop saying thank you it’s scaring me
And the children

gongying bai jiu daren
ya stop it zhao-ge

zhao大哥
hahaha
okay okay
应该的

zhuo小zhuo
What you 应该 do is go home and shower after you eat this because you’re starting to get grody
Do you really want li lun to see your unshowered ass first thing out of op

zhao大哥
you say this to me
on this day of my ex’s surgery?

zhuo小zhuo
Yeah
And i’ll say it again

zhao大哥
:’)
always my boy

zhuo小zhuo
Whatever

zhao大哥
he’s out of surgery and stable now
just sitting with him in post-op

PSJ
That was faster than I expected.
Wait, you’re online. Are you in the office?

zhao大哥
no i just grabbed my laptop when i went home to shower
i figure i’d do some work while i wait

xiaoxiao
i told hr to put in sick for you today!
also phew good to hear

zhao大哥
thank you my beautiful flowering nasturtium
his blood pressure is a little low right now so they’re keeping an eye on it

zhuo小zhuo
Stop working and just sit with him
We can work the cheng huang and ran yi files for two days

zhao大哥
it’s a lot of files

zhuo小zhuo
So?
Are you doubting z&bz’s capabilities

zhao大哥
hhghghhhh
okay
i might put my head down for a bit my temples are pounding

xiaoxiao
have you slept at all since saturday? :(

zhao大哥
kind of
here and there

zhuo小zhuo
No he has not

PSJ
Get some shuteye, Xiao Zhao.

Zhuo Yichen, esq.
Zhuo & Baize, LLP
I looked into zhao wan’er’s files here at z&bz out of curiosity and a hunch

Wen Xiao, esq.
Zhuo & Baize, LLP
whoa using the intranet chat
what’d you find?

Zhuo Yichen, esq.
Zhuo & Baize, LLP
Not much but she used to have a brother with the same name as zhao yuanzhou
But the picture is definitely not the zhao yuanzhou we know
Of course i can’t pull up his files from a rudimentary search but
I wonder
You know

Wen Xiao, esq.
Zhuo & Baize, LLP
huh.

Zhuo Yichen, esq.
Zhuo & Baize, LLP
Yeah
But i think i’m okay not knowing
If he wants to tell us the real story one day then he will

Wen Xiao, esq.
Zhuo & Baize, LLP
yeah
of course i know this objectively, but it’s so strange to imagine his entire life before we knew him

Zhuo Yichen, esq.
Zhuo & Baize, LLP
Lol
Like a stray cat you find on the street
And you wonder what kind of fights it used to get into

Wen Xiao, esq.
Zhuo & Baize, LLP
i’m glad this stray cat chose us :)

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Hello
Is this Zhuo Yichen

↤ +1 333-3333
Yes who is this?

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Li Lun

↤ +1 333-3333
Oh
How are you?
Is zhao yuanzhou with you?
Hope your procedure went well. he’s been worried so we know about it
Wait how do you have my number

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
It was fine and so am I
He’s here. Sleeping
And I extracted your number from Zhu Yan’s phone

↤ Dweeb
Not loving the use of ‘extracted’ here

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
God you’re annoying as I imagined you
It was perfectly legal

↤ Dweeb
Okay i suggest giving this a watch while you’re on bedrest
[YOUTUBE] Legality vs. Morality - Intro to Political Philosophy Part 1
Also aren’t you in post-op
How are you texting this much

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
It was back surgery not double arm amputation
My fingers work fine.

↤ Dweeb
Are you always like this

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Like what
Right?

↤ Dweeb
God no wonder zhao yuanzhou is obsessed with you

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
“Obsessed” you’re funny

↤ Dweeb
Wait
Shut up no stop typing
Are you being cute or are you serious
Look what do you want. you texted me first

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
I stayed under your roof this week.
Regardless of how annoying I find you, that was a significant risk
I’ve transferred you monetary compensation for any problems this may cause you

↤ Dweeb
Yes i was aware
Thank you so much btw. for the timely heads up and for letting me know now that my neck was at risk

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Guess I’m not surprised
Zhu Yan says nothing slips your notice.

↤ Dweeb
Uhhh this is a lot of money
I could get in trouble for this
How do i send it back

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Don’t. It’s going to look like laundering.
You’ll just have to accept it

↤ Dweeb
Gee thanks. for the extra work this will now cause me
Can i say something

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Saying no wouldn’t stop you
So speak, I suppose

↤ Dweeb
Idk about you but i wasn’t being cute saying zhao yuanzhou is obsessed with you

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
I really don’t see how that’s any of your business

↤ Dweeb
Unfortunately i have found myself involved in friendship and camaraderie with him so it kind of is

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Ha. He does that to you

↤ Dweeb
Yeah idk how it happened either
He’s good at it
I’ll never know exactly what happened with you two but i know enough to say that. it eats him alive and it’s been eating him alive as long as i’ve known him
Which has been like? eight years?
He’s a piece of work and he’s fucked up a lot but i don’t think i’ve ever known a zhao yuanzhou who wasn’t living out of some kind of guilt towards you
NOT making excuses for him btw. like i said he’s a piece of fucking work lol
But. just a thought
Maybe if you say what he wants to hear he’ll say what you want to hear

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
And what do you think it is I want to hear

↤ Dweeb
??? I don’t know?
Do you even know?
Look inward dude

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
What does he want to hear
You said you’re his friend, so that much you should know

↤ Dweeb
Yeah i’m his friend not his therapist
I don’t KNOW try starting with ‘i forgive you’ or something
Have you spoken to a human person at all

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
What if I don’t

↤ Dweeb
Then lose him
I gotta get back to work but just think about it
It doesn’t have to be like this
Especially not for another twelve years
Life is one huge bad cold but it’s nice to have someone to wipe the snot off your nose

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
You have a way with words.

↤ Dweeb
Thank you

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Not a compliment.

Chapter Text

Ao Ying ↦
Morning Li-laoban,

As requested, I have rescheduled your flight back to Macau. Your new departure date will be in two weeks. Confirmation is attached.

I have also extended your car rental for the same amount of time. The rental can be returned at the airport. Let me know if you need a driver instead so I can get that booked.

↤ 大老板
Thank you

Ao Ying ↦
Hope you are feeling better!

↤ 大老板
I am not but I appreciate your well-wishes
Also I approved your PTO request this morning

Ao Ying ↦
Thank you!!

↤ 大老板
Going somewhere fun?

Ao Ying ↦
Just a trip with friends for the holidays!

↤ 大老板
Good
Enjoy yourself. You work too hard

咱家xiao chen ↦
Reminder i’m gonna head home this weekend
Are you gonna be okay by yourself

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
don’t you worry, i didn’t forget!
you’re on my calendar. tell your father and brother i said hi
yes i’ll be fine!
i might stay in li lun’s hotel for a few days to look after him

咱家xiao chen ↦
Is he happy about that

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
not even a little

咱家xiao chen ↦
Lmao
What do you see in him
That was a rhetorical question DON’T answer that i just ate lunch

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
i guess because i don’t have to be zhao yuanzhou around him
i can just be zhu yan
i can hear you fake heaving across the office you ass

咱家xiao chen ↦
It’s real as fuck actually?
What part of don’t answer that was difficult to understand
Anyway i made a bunch of braised pork and pork short rib soup that’ll keep for a few weeks it’s all in the freezer. it’s not there for decoration so you better eat it
Idk if his hotel reservation is gonna run out at the end of this week since he’s here for a month but he can stay at our place once i take off
After i take off. to be clear
So i’m far far away from you freaks

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
do you really think he’s in any condition to do anything with me
like anything remotely athletic

咱家xiao chen ↦
Please stop talking
Please stop talking right now i swear to god i’ll hit you with my car

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
though i’m sure we’ll find a way

咱家xiao chen ↦
PLEASE STOP TALKING
[IMG_74826.jpg]

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
what the fuck
is that pei jie rock-climbing

咱家xiao chen ↦
it’s safe for work sijing
it’s just a tall picture i use when i need to bump the conversation off my screen

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
bless you

咱家xiao chen ↦
Go to hell

wen xiao jie ↦
is xiao zhao home?
i was swung by to say bye before my flight but no one answered
i left your guys’ presents at your door so i hope no one takes them

↤ zhuo yichen
Shit sorry i wasn’t home either i was at lunch with pei jie and her brother
No he’s at the hospital with li lun
I’ll be home soon so i’ll get the presents
Sorry yours is gonna be late btw. it’s shipping from hong kong

wen xiao jie ↦
no worries! i figured :)
also oooh!! i’m excited and curious now
have fun with pei jiejie and xiao heng!

↤ zhuo yichen
Safe flight
When do you take off

wen xiao jie ↦
in four hours :’( i got here too early and now it’s also delayed
so i’m sitting with a book at the gate

↤ zhuo yichen
Goddamn that sucks
Hope it’s a long book

wen xiao jie ↦
it’s gormenghast
which is 500+ pages

↤ zhuo yichen
You’re all set then
Tell zhao wan’er i said hi also

wen xiao jie ↦
definitely!!
is xiao zhao okay today?

↤ zhuo yichen
I think so
Li lun’s doing better so he is too
I think he’ll be discharged in a few days
Zhao yuanzhou says he’s been walking around the hospital wing

wen xiao jie ↦
he’s lucky to have xiao zhao
anyone is

↤ zhuo yichen
Lol
They’re lucky to have each other
Subjecting anyone else to their personalities would be a human rights violation

xiaoxiao
[IMG_67388.jpg]
[IMG_67389.jpg]
[IMG_67390.jpg]
:) ♥ at the road of lights installation with wan’er-laoshi!!

ying lei!
omg i’ve been to that! so beautiful!!!!
what are you drinking

xiaoxiao
spiced blueberry wine? i’m not sure i like it yet
not sure how i feel about hot wine in general

PSJ
So good to see Wan’er-laoshi. Tell her I said hi and happy holidays.
The lights (and you) look lovely.

zhuo小zhuo
Oh shit lights go crazy
Glad i saw this right before i got my flight lol
Got on*

xiaoxiao
that’s right you’re flying tonight! safe flight xiao zhuo!

zhuo小zhuo
Thanks there are two babies at this gate already pray for me

zhao大哥
i hope both of them are behind you

zhuo小zhuo
Fuck you so much zhao yuanzhou

gongying bai jiu daren
i wanna go to there

xiaoxiao
we should bring you one day, xiao jiu
they make the wine in front of you i think both you and ying lei would love it

gongying bai jiu daren
yooo fuk yeah
i wanna get smizzed off hot wine

PSJ
Smizzed…

xiaoxiao
hope everyone enjoys their breaks!!
send pictures of your exploits :)

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Are you still at the office

↤ Zhu Yan
yes love i’m working
are you okay?

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Why are you still working
Is anyone still working

↤ Zhu Yan
a couple of the paralegals are, yes
but the office is pretty empty so i can actually get work done
i’ll head home right after my last meeting

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Okay
Can you pick up some ginger ale on your way back
For nausea

↤ Zhu Yan
of course!
are you still nauseous

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Seldomly
I’ve just been lying in the bathroom
Nothing coming up but just in case

↤ Zhu Yan
lying in the bathroom?! on the floor?!!?
do you have a blanket at least??

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Yeah
And a pillow

↤ Zhu Yan
you’re going to give me a heart attack. yes i will get you ginger ale.
please go back to bed and just put a trash can next to it.
oh my god

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
I’m fine don’t worry

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Did you mean what you said last night

↤ Zhu Yan
?? what did i say last night?
that xiao zhuo’s cooking is actually quite good?
yes, i’m sure he didn’t poison the frozen soups.

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
No. Later
Did you mean what you said about
Missing me

↤ Zhu Yan
…i thought you were asleep for all that

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Well I almost was until you started talking
You still don’t have an inside voice
Thirty-two and can’t whisper

↤ Zhu Yan
do you want an answer or do you want to be a pain

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Answer

↤ Zhu Yan
yes. of course i meant it
i miss you right now
i miss you when you’re right in front of me

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Then why do you always let go
Why did you let go first

↤ Zhu Yan
it’s
well it is complicated, i promise
but how i feel about you isn’t. none of that’s complicated. all that’s easy.
the easiest thing i’ve ever done is be next to you

↤ Zhu Yan
did you fall asleep

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
No
Just trying to understand you
I feel like that was easier once

↤ Zhu Yan
i did make it hard for you to
so that’s not on you
and that’s by design. that’s what i mean, complicated.
i can tell you everything at home

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
No say it now
If I see you I’ll lose the nerve to reply

↤ Zhu Yan
okay
i can’t be specific then
partly because i would rather this not have a record
again, i might add
but i didn’t leave you after your accident because i wanted to, i left because it was safer to
you might be able to guess why, given what we’d been fighting about
but there’s a reason you’ve been able to become who you are today, and you weren’t…removed from this mortal coil…after you backed out from the transport job
and i’ve stayed this way because i’m still scared even though we’re not twenty anymore
it’s easier to live in a world that still has you in it, hating me, than in a world without you, because of me

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Uh
Is this why all my accounts only date back to twelve years ago?

↤ Zhu Yan
yes.
and why my name is zhao yuanzhou

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Oh.
That means
God wait.

↤ Zhu Yan
yeeeeahhh

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
What is wrong with you
Why would you do that?
You could’ve been killed
God that means when I was recovering you were doing all that?
What is wrong with you
What if you’d died
That was my own fault if I had to pay for it with my life then so be it

↤ Zhu Yan
yeah but then being would not be so easy anymore
because you’d be gone. see
i had to
i told you, a world with you hating me is better than a world without you because of me

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Are you crazy

↤ Zhu Yan
not significantly so
but weren’t we both
illegal goods transport, li lun, what did you think was going to happen

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
I can’t believe you

↤ Zhu Yan
i did an impeccable job btw. look at us, scot-free for twelve years.
you could afford to compliment my flawless work sometimes

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
You’ve lost your mind

↤ Zhu Yan
take your time i’ve had twelve years to sit on this

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Why would you do that for me
Why would you do any of that

↤ Zhu Yan
easy
i loved you then
i love you still
i became someone else so i could keep loving you

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Stop
Stop stop

↤ Zhu Yan
becoming zhao yuanzhou, becoming a lawyer, watching you from afar for twelve years, has all been one big, very poor, buried-like-a-body i love you
sorry. i’m very good at arguing
not as good at this

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
This time
Will you stay

↤ Zhu Yan
will you?

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
Yes
Come home
Come back to me

+86 55-5555-5555 ↦
You’re already asleep
And you’re right next to me
So I would say this to you but when I look at you I forget because the world finally goes quiet
But me too.
I love you still too

ying lei!
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[IMG_4782.jpg]
holiday dinner by me and yeye ^-^

xiaoxiao
that looks amazing!!
did you roast the duck yourself?

PSJ
Merry Christmas to you too, Ying Lei, and everyone.
Would love to eat a holiday dinner made by you someday.

ying lei!
yes :3
thank you jingjing jie! i’ll make one for you guys for cny in a few months
嘿嘿

zhuo小zhuo
Holy shit that’s a lot of excellent food
Happy holidays guys
[VID_311.mov]
My family’s skiing today

xiaoxiao
whoa look at all that snow!!
xiao zhuo you are so cool
i would faceplant immediately

zhuo小zhuo
Lol i did that once already
I’m out of practice
[VID_313.mov]
Video from my brother lol

gongying bai jiu daren
are you okay wtf
that looked like it hurt
[IMG_29837.jpg]
dinner w da fam

zhuo小zhuo
Yeah i’m fine that was like a normal fall lol
Nice xiao jiu
Hope you’re catching up on sleep

gongying bai jiu daren
fuk yeah you know i am
zzzzzz

PSJ
[IMG_9039.jpg]
A-Heng and I are mostly stay-cationing, but he had an exhibition at his design program. Very cool entries. Here’s me being a proud sister.

zhuo小zhuo
What
Exactly am i looking at

PSJ
Between us, I don’t know.
It’s a sculpture.
I’m proud, though.
He lights up when he talks about it. That’s enough for me.

zhuo小zhuo
Huh
Good for him

ying lei!
it’s got a certain
what’s it called. jay nay say kwah

PSJ
Sure.

xiaoxiao
eat well everyone!!
or ski safely
what are you up to @zhao大哥?

zhuo小zhuo
Lmao i can’t believe he didn’t immediately come laugh at me for eating shit while skiing
I sent a whole video too

zhuo小zhuo
Dude lol where is he

咱家xiao chen ↦
Bitch are you dead

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
hellow what
noi was sleepign
evyerything okay?
i’m awake.

咱家xiao chen ↦
It’s like 4 pm on CHRISTMAS DAY?
Why are you sleeping

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
oh sorry i didn’t realize you were the shitscram police

咱家xiao chen ↦
Just seems like a day you should be awake and doing festive things

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
fuck you i’m super festive
i had eggnog last night
it was terrible.

咱家xiao chen ↦
Well merry christmas to you dickhead
Even if you’re spending it sleeping for some reason

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
merry christmas xiao chen!!
world hard and cold
boyfriend in bed soft and warm :)

咱家xiao chen ↦
Puke and vom and puke and vom i wish my skiing fall had killed me
Wait

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
no be careful!!!
that’s how natasha richardson passed away :(

咱家xiao chen ↦
Shut up BOYFRIEND?
DID YOU GUYS TALK?
I’m asking if you guys fucking talked and didn’t do the other thing.
BITCH???????//
If you don’t fucking answer me i’m calling you and he’s gonna be so mad.

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
you are so annoying

咱家xiao chen ↦
Yes i’m a lawyer now answer me did you guys TALK.

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
yes we talked
actually he opened the door and greeted me with “i forgive you” which was a little confusing but very welcome
i promise we talked we talked like 11 hours and i cried a little
and he cried a lot

咱家xiao chen ↦
Extremely haunting image thank you

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
he’s cute :(

咱家xiao chen ↦
Your taste is opaque and inscrutable and also a little disgusting to me

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
i think that’s the mark of best friends actually
are you really best friends if you don’t think your best friend’s partner is some weird pet of theirs

咱家xiao chen ↦
Well at least you know.
I’m glad you guys talked
He texted me last week and i gave him some random bullshit advice so it’s good to hear he took it. i guess

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
i think we spent two days talking, to be honest
5 one day and then 6 the next
among other things

咱家xiao chen ↦
First of all i hate you
Also isn’t he literally supposed to be on bedrest

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
he’s walking more and more every day! doctors say it’s good to start moving again
we walked all the way to the bakery downstairs yesterday. for the eggnog
also it was back surgery, not castration
all of his stuff still works perfectly fine.

咱家xiao chen ↦
Please go to hell
Why do you guys talk exactly the same god i can’t believe i’m finally seeing it now
[IMG_74826.jpg]

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
not safe for work sijing again
does she even know that you’re using this pic

咱家xiao chen ↦
No and it will stay that way
I’m going to dinner. get up and eat something you fucking harlot
Merry christmas to you and your weird pet

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
oh my god why are you eating dinner at 4 pm your entire family is eighty fucking years old
i love you too xiao chen
be careful on those slopes!!!

Zhu Yan ↦
when is your flight next week?

↤ 我的lun子🍃
Tuesday at 12:45 PM
Are you working

Zhu Yan ↦
yes sorry i’m just in the other room, a call came up for one of my cases
i’ll be done soon

↤ 我的lun子🍃
I mean that day

Zhu Yan ↦
not anymore!

↤ 我的lun子🍃
D
Sorry
If it’s important you shouldn’t beg off. Your work is important

Zhu Yan ↦
cases are always important
but the people i want to keep in my life moreso

↤ 我的lun子🍃
Are you sure

Zhu Yan ↦
yeah
:(
you’re leaving so soon
i’m sad

↤ 我的lun子🍃
I’ll come back
If you want

Zhu Yan ↦
of course i want you to come back!
:(
please come back. don’t be so far all the time
come back and stay

↤ 我的lun子🍃
Okay

Zhu Yan ↦
i mean it

↤ 我的lun子🍃
I know
I mean it too

gongying bai jiu daren
hows break over already im crashing out
back on campus boutta end it all

xiaoxiao
it sure is a gloomy monday in the office
half the firm’s still out hungover :’)

zhuo小zhuo
Our flight back’s delayed lol
Too much fog
Is zhao yuanzhou at the office already

xiaoxiao
he’s out till tomorrow!
he’s dropping li lun off at the airport

zhuo小zhuo
Oh shit? lmao
When’s the last time you ever took pto @zhao大哥

xiaoxiao
i think never

zhuo小zhuo
Good don’t come back

xiaoxiao
he doesn’t mean that xiao zhao!!
wow i didn’t realize li lun was leaving tomorrow, even with the two week extension
time’s flown

PSJ
Are you by yourself today, Wen Xiao?
I’m still out but I was helping my brother move for this semester. I can bring you food.

xiaoxiao
really?
yes please!!
i want sushi :)

80000
UA000: Hi Li Lun, your flight from SFO to MFM is now boarding at gate G12. Please follow the boarding directions of the gate operators. Doors will close at 12:35 PM.

Thank you for choosing United!

我的lun子🍃 ↦
On the plane now
It’s packed

↤ Yan儿
you brought your painkillers in your carry-on right?
i hope tsa didn’t give you any trouble for it

我的lun子🍃 ↦
Yeah
I had a doctor’s note
But they did open it up to inspect

↤ Yan儿
of course they did
safe flight! tell me when you land!

我的lun子🍃 ↦
I have to transfer in Incheon

↤ Yan儿
walk slow :(

我的lun子🍃 ↦
I’ll try
I have one hour between flights

↤ Yan儿
phew that’s tight, incheon is big
well, walk as slow as you can afford
and get some sleep!

我的lun子🍃 ↦
I will

↤ Yan儿
miss you already
back to sleeping like shit
:(

我的lun子🍃 ↦
I miss you too
I’ll come back
I love you

↤ Yan儿
i love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
always and always!!!!!!!!

咱家xiao chen ↦
Package for you

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
fuck yeah thanks
can you open it for me actually

咱家xiao chen ↦
?
It better not be something like 100 cockroaches

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
respectfully, what is wrong with you
why would i order 100 cockroaches

咱家xiao chen ↦
I don’t know. you’re dating one

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
i’m telling him you said that!

咱家xiao chen ↦
Do it
What’s he gonna do to me from macau

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
why would you challenge him like that
you have a death wish
anyway, asking because it’s my bday gift for pei jie but i’m worried it got banged up in transit, so can you check

咱家xiao chen ↦
Oh lol
[IMG_49698.jpg]
??>? You got her an umbrella?

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
oh whoops no
that’s for me
just leave it in my room
thanks!

咱家xiao chen ↦
Huh
You bought an umbrella for yourself?

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
…yes?
this rain, xiao chen
i’ve just braved it all with a coat but it’s not cutting it anymore

咱家xiao chen ↦
I know
I’m just saying. huh
Well that’s good
It’s fucking ugly btw

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
sigh. intelligence can’t buy taste, it seems

咱家xiao chen ↦
Die

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
see you for dinner ♥

Chapter Text

xiaoxiao
today’s the day!!
xiao zhuo and ying lei, 辛苦了!!

zhuo小zhuo
Lol
I’m never doing this again

PSJ
This was your idea.

ying lei!
aw T _ T i had fun though
it was like a week of sleepaway camp

zhuo小zhuo
Not you lol you’re great ying lei
Learned some good recipes from you this week
The logistics though
His flight tracker says he’s still four hours out

gongying bai jiu daren
you wont have to do this again if this works right
lol
like li luns moving back frfr hes not just visiting

xiaoxiao
that’s right!

zhuo小zhuo
Well you only turn 33 once

PSJ
Is that…a very significant age…?

xiaoxiao
no
xiao zhuo is just thoughtful and wanted to do something nice for his birthday ♥
xiao zhao is gonna be sooooo shocked i can’t wait to see his face hehe
any sign he suspects anything?

zhuo小zhuo
I don’t think so
I only texted him during hong kong daytime hours
And i made my brother send me pics for extra proof
Also i didn’t email him any flight confirmations lmao only the time li lun lands

ying lei!
that’s so thorough
thank you for all your hard work spymaster zhuo
all i did was house you for the week

zhuo小zhuo
I mean i didn’t really do anything either
Except lie

PSJ
Xiao Zhao’s hard to lie to.
I’m impressed he hasn’t suspected anything.

zhuo小zhuo
I put a work travel autoreply on my email
Even our clients think i’m out
And i haven’t elft ying lei’s place for a week
Left*

gongying bai jiu daren
elft

ying lei!
elft
it’s been very funny to watch you work in your sweatpants

xiaoxiao
okay so
if li lun lands at 10:05 am, when a bunch of other int’l flights also land, it’ll take him a while to get through
he won’t be out of customs and immigration until probably at least 10:30? oh and if he has to wait for his luggage then that’s maybe another 5-10 mins
at around 8:45 am i’ll go into xiao zhao’s office and say that xiao zhuo texted and said he’s not feeling super well, so we ought to go to the airport early and pick him up as soon as he gets through immigration
i’ll say i’m worried and want to go with him

zhuo小zhuo
He only has one carry-on
The rest is getting shipped here

ying lei!
wait why would it take xiao zhao this much convincing

xiaoxiao
if it’s xiao zhuo, xiao zhao usually waits till he’s landed to start driving to the airport
but of course he should be there for when li lun comes through the doors

ying lei!
oooohhhh
damn did he say anything when you booked a flight to literally land on his birthday
“you”

zhuo小zhuo
Lmao yes
“Motherfucker do you know how bad i have to love someone to do this”

xiaoxiao
awww ♥
well it will still be true, even if it’s not you!

gongying bai jiu daren
im just surprised li-ge agreed to it

zhuo小zhuo
His exec assistant did the booking
And contacted the movers
And made sure he had an actual place to stay here
All he had to do was say yes or no

gongying bai jiu daren
i hope he pays her so much lol
i would kill myself if i had to be his assistant

zhuo小zhuo
Same
We need to send her a gift basket after this
Okay well i’ll update when li lun texts so keep your eyes on your phone @xiaoxiao

xiaoxiao
you got it!!

wen xiao jie ↦
we’re off!!

↤ zhuo yichen
Already??
It’s only 8:35

wen xiao jie ↦
i had a feeling this would happen so i went to his office early
as soon as i told him “you” weren’t feeling well he insisted making a stop at the pharmacy to get pedialyte and hot tea
so i calculated in that extra time

↤ zhuo yichen
You’re a genius lol

wen xiao jie ↦
yes :)
anyway i’m just in the car as he’s paying now
after which we’ll head to the airport
did li lun text yet?

↤ zhuo yichen
Nope not yet

Maybe: Li Lun ↦
They’re shutting off in-flight wifi now
Landing soon
Waiting for a runway so we’re twenty mins delayed

↤ Dweeb
Cool
Yeah i saw it on the flight tracker

Maybe: Li Lun ↦
Of course you have a flight tracker

↤ Dweeb
What the fuck’s that supposed to mean

Maybe: Li Lun ↦
You seem like the type

zhuo yichen ↦
Landing soon

↤ wen xiao jie
ok!!

Maybe: Li Lun ↦
I’ve landed

↤ Dweeb
Hope you didn’t bring anything worth over 10k in that carry-on

Maybe: Li Lun ↦
I’m not fucking stupid

↤ Dweeb
I’m not always convinced

zhuo yichen ↦
He’s in immigration now

↤ wen xiao jie
got it
haha xiao zhao is still just working on his laptop
how do i distract him and make him look up

zhuo yichen ↦
God i hate him
Make him people-watch with you

↤ wen xiao jie
i got him a croissant and he’s still just eating it with one hand and reading with the other

zhuo yichen ↦
I hate that the only thing that makes him put his shit down and actually focus on the world around him is fucking li lun
He literally has horse blinders on until that man is in front of him and then it’s like he suddenly remembers he’s a person with wants needs and desires
Oh shit wait he’s texting me

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
what happened
did a little bird get a cold in hong kong

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Fuck you
I was working long nights with jet lag

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
i know babe i figured
i got you the tieguanyin tea you like
you can drink it in the car
i’ll tell hr to put in sick for you

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Thanks
I’m still in immigration right now

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
did you bring me presents??

↤ 咱家xiao chen
Yeah

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
wait like actually?
aww!!! xiao chen!

↤ 咱家xiao chen
It’s your birthday i’m not actually a real asshole
Of course

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
what’d you bring me
i hope you got me feng li su

↤ 咱家xiao chen
I got you something better

Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou ↦
what could be better than feng li su!?

Maybe: Li Lun ↦
Done with immigration
Heading out now

↤ Dweeb
Okay i’ll tell them
Hey
Welcome home

Maybe: Li Lun ↦
Oh
Thanks

咱家xiao chen ↦
Heading out

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
ok watching the screen for you
lol i love watching international flights come in everyone looks so rough
the flight attendants always look beautiful and fresh in comparison

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
goddamn you’re taking forever

↤ Maybe: Zhao Yuanzhou
wait
that’s not y

xiaoxiao
[VID_109.mov]
success!!! ♥♥♥♥♥♥

ying lei!
AAAWWWWWWWWW
holy shit how did he not break his back again

zhuo小zhuo
Zhao yuanzhou’s pretty light
That being said jesus christ yeah how did he not knock him over

gongying bai jiu daren
dam nice
congrats gegemen and jiejiemen for pulling this off

PSJ
Hardly ever see Xiao Zhao this happy.
Your video is so steady, Wen Xiao.
Great work everyone!

zhuo小zhuo
Lmao
Happy 33rd birthday @zhao大哥

gongying bai jiu daren
hap birth zhao-ge

zhao大哥
I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU GUYS?????????
HOW DID YOU PULL THIS OFF

zhuo小zhuo
Stressfully

zhao大哥
WHERE EVEN ARE YOU????
ARE YOU NOT IN HONG KONG??????????

zhuo小zhuo
No lol i’m at ying lei’s house
Fucking GOT you lmaooo

ying lei!
^-^v

xiaoxiao
♥♥♥ happy birthday xiao zhao!!!!! we love you
this was all xiao zhuo’s idea
he and li lun schemed
we just helped

zhuo小zhuo
:|

zhao大哥
stop i just stopped crying
holy shit

PSJ
Happy birthday, Xiao Zhao.
It’s been multiple weeks of planning, but we’re just glad you’re happy.

zhao大哥
i can’t believe
i literally cannot believe
i’m aghast
HOW

PSJ
There was one day this past week we almost panicked because Wen Xiao almost asked Xiao Zhuo if he wanted to be part of the milk tea order.
She unsent the message before it went through.

xiaoxiao
my life flashed before my eyes

zhao大哥
oh my god

zhuo小zhuo
I thought i was gonna be the weak link lol
Because of the multiple chats
Anyway you have the apartment two days to yourselves before i come back and li lun’s lease starts
So you have 48 hours to be freaks

zhao大哥
okay. i’m still crying but noted thank you i’ll take my clothes off right now

zhuo小zhuo
Don’t fucking TELL us jesus

zhao大哥
oh my god
i love you guys. i love you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i used to think. man. the only person that’ll ever look out for you is yourself
but actually
friends will save you!!!!!!!!!
friends save you every day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

zhuo小zhuo
Okay okay
Go pay attention to your b*yfr**nd

zhao大哥
i WILL

Chapter Text

zhuo小zhuo
@xiaoxiao Are you still home or have you left already

xiaoxiao
pei jiejie and i are in the parking garage!
speak now or forever hold your peace

zhuo小zhuo
Oh thank god
Can you get into my place and get another pair of cufflinks mine just snapped and these sleeves look stupid as fuck without them

xiaoxiao
oh noooo
yes of course
wait which room are you now?

zhuo小zhuo
Floor 7 room 714
Under you guys now
Should be on the key i gave you
You’re a lifesaver thank you

xiaoxiao
i’m never going to get used to that
yes i am :)

zhuo小zhuo
I still hit 8 in the elevator sometimes lol
Yeah idk what happened i took them out of their cushion and one of the heads broke right off in my fingers

xiaoxiao
[IMG_7119.jpg]
which ones do you want me to bring?

zhuo小zhuo
Uhhhh
Fuck the ones i brought were the ones that MATCHED
Goddammit

xiaoxiao
send me their color palette again?

zhuo小zhuo
[IMG_299857.jpg]

xiaoxiao
hmm
just silver probably will be your best bet
the other one has yellow accents

zhuo小zhuo
Works for me
Thank you
What’s eta for you guys

xiaoxiao
about 11 am!
pei jiejie drives fast

ying lei!
were about halfway there
eta 10
this is bai jiu typing btw lol

zhuo小zhuo
Good drive safe

xiaoxiao
how many people are there already xiao zhuo? can you tell?

zhuo小zhuo
Uhhh not really
People are trickling in
My dad and brother got in late as hell last night
Okay gotta run for reception dinner prep see you guys soon

xiaoxiao
[IMG_7122.jpg]
[IMG_7123.jpg]
this is the nicest airbnb i’ve ever been in
there are heated toilets!!!

gongying bai jiu daren
not sure how i feel about those tbh
feels like youre sitting down on a toilet someone just used
but ya its nice as fok here

zhao大哥
that is gorgeous
did everyone make it?

PSJ
We’re all accounted for. We divvied up the rooms already, too.
Xiao Zhuo gets one to himself because we figure he’ll be super tired tonight.

zhuo小zhuo
Thanks
Yeah i’ll probably be back kind of late-ish not sure
Need to come drop my shit off at some point later today i’ll text one of you

zhao大哥
i can drop it off for you if it’s just that one suitcase

zhuo小zhuo
Please don’t make it harder for me to keep track of you
Let ME move shit around

zhao大哥
听你的!

zhuo小zhuo
Aold did you remember change your laptop password to something the event coordinator knows
Also*

zhao大哥
wayyy ahead of you

zhuo小zhuo
Okay good i remembered it suddenly while i was pissing

zhao大哥
love that you think of me while you’re pissing
don’t do it all alone beautiful

zhuo小zhuo
Kill yourself please remember you’re getting married in less than 24 hours

Yan儿 ↦
where are you love

↤ 我的lun子🍃
Courtyard
Talking to the coordinator

zhuo小zhuo
+86 11-1111-1111
That’s li lun’s assistant’s number
If you guys have a logistics question and i don’t reply
Honestly she’s cool
A little weird but that’s to be expected

xiaoxiao
thank you!!
who else is in his wedding party?

zhuo小zhuo
Her
That’s it

ying lei!
just one person??

xiaoxiao
i guess it is a pretty small wedding…
xiao zhao said the final guest list was only 61 people

zhuo小zhuo
Lol yeah i mean zhao yuanzhou only has me
But i guess i’m not his literal secretary
I feel kind of bad actually
Ao ying seems like his only friend

PSJ
That explains so much about him.
Before he moved back I would describe his personality as “friendless behavior.”

gongying bai jiu daren
omg
jiejie im so proud look at y ou
you used that correctly

PSJ
Thank you.

zhuo小zhuo
Honestly she’s like the most normal of his few guests
Couple of them came by the venue earlier to give li lun early congrats and i’m just like
Am i gonna arrested if i look at you?
Lmao
Okay gotta run

PSJ
[Link attached]
Everyone say what they want and I’ll put in a group order for lunch.
I’m assuming Xiao Zhuo is eating whatever he can get at the venue right now, but we can order you something anyway.

xiaoxiao
oooh what is this place
these are cute bento boxes
i’ll get the tonkatsu
just add a small grilled mackerel bento for xiao zhuo

gongying bai jiu daren
same tonkatsu

ying lei!
i’ll get the grilled chicken bento!

PSJ
Okay.
Order placed. Should be here in about an hour.

我的lun子🍃 ↦
Where’d you go

↤ Yan儿
sorry! back in the suite with the coordinator
for tomorrow’s schedule

zhuo yichen ↦
Gonna swing by to drop off my stuff @xiaoxiao
Zhao yuanzhou and li lun are in my car they wanted to come say hi before reception

↤ wen xiao jie
yay!

xiaoxiao
[IMG_7126.jpg]
reception ready!

zhao大哥
everyone looks so beautiful
ying lei love what you’ve done with your hair
you and xiao chen both should let it down more
though i guess working in a restaurant forces you to keep it up most of the time

ying lei!
a compliment from xiao zhao! i’ve made it!!

xiaoxiao
[IMG_7127.jpg]
and a picture of us all carrying bai jiu ♥

zhao大哥
little man is easily the drippiest of us all
see you guys soon!!

zhao大哥
[IMG_928957.jpg]
[IMG_928958.jpg]
[IMG_928959.jpg]
[IMG_928960.jpg]
[IMG_928961.jpg]
[IMG_928962.jpg]
[IMG_928963.jpg]
see you all tomorrow!

xiaoxiao
[IMG_7128.jpg]
[IMG_7129.jpg]
[IMG_7133.jpg]
[IMG_7134.jpg]
you and li lun were so handsome!!!
get as much sleep as you can tonight
see you tomorrow
4:00 pm right?

zhuo小zhuo
Yes
But venue is open starting 3:30 so come any time after then
[IMG_299867.jpg]
[IMG_299868.jpg]

xiaoxiao
i got a chance to talk to ao ying tonight
she’s actually sweet
a little weird yes but mostly sweet

PSJ
[IMG_122002.jpg]
[IMG_122004.jpg]
I didn’t really get any good pictures, but I love these shots of Bai Jiu trying to princess carry Wen Xiao.

gongying bai jiu daren
saurie jie lol

xiaoxiao
♥
let’s not try that again for another few years

ying lei!
of course i had to take pictures of the snack spreads
[IMG_46635.jpg]
[IMG_46636.jpg]
[IMG_46637.jpg]
whatever they seasoned the roasted vegetables with was heavenly

zhuo小zhuo
Lol i told zhao yuanzhou that he had to pick that one for reception or i’d kill him
Okay @zhao大哥 i’m heading back to the airbnb do you need anything else

zhao大哥
nope
you’re free i’ll see you tomorrow morning

chou xiaozi ↦
umm
that you in the bathroom lol

↤ zhuo yichen
Why are you awake it’s almost 3 am

chou xiaozi ↦
im a college student this is like 8pm for me

↤ zhuo yichen
Jesus i still think you’re fourteen
Yeah sorry did you need to piss

chou xiaozi ↦
nah
just thought i heard someone crying
soz ill leave you alone

↤ zhuo yichen
Oh lol no worries
I’m practicing the multiple speeches i have to give tomorrow
Later today i guess

chou xiaozi ↦
o
you good?

↤ zhuo yichen
Yeah i’m fine.

chou xiaozi ↦
well im making ramen if you want some lol

↤ zhuo yichen
I don’t but i’ll come make tea

ao ying ↦
hello is this wen xiao

↤ ms. wen xiao
yes! good morning!
i’m just about to leave the airbnb and head to the wedding suite

ao ying ↦
before you come do any of your friends have thick hair

↤ ms. wen xiao
hmm yes
our friend ying lei has lots of hair
why, what’s wrong?

ao ying ↦
laoban needs more pins
the stylist has a lot but they’re not big enough to hold his hair

↤ ms. wen xiao
oh man let me see
ying lei’s blonde let me check with everyone

xiaoxiao
@everyone who has big pins
for hair
except ying lei - we love you but you have blonde pins

ying lei!
i’m sorry T _ T

zhuo小zhuo
It’s fine lol we found some
Thanks wen xiao
This wouldn’t be a problem if li lun got a haircut ever

ying lei!
his hair’s so long because that’s where he stores all his secrets

xiaoxiao
oh phew good!
okay i’m heading to the venue first now

ying lei!
@zhuo小zhuo pei jie xiao jiu and i are heading over now

zhuo小zhuo
Good see you guys soon

ying lei!
did anyone bring tissues i just realized

xiaoxiao
i did!
oh wait, my purse is in the wedding suite…

ying lei!
it’s okay xiao jiu and i just made some of our own from restroom paper towels

ying lei!
[IMG_46648.jpg]
poor xiao zhuo is more tears than eyeball here

xiaoxiao
awww!!
haha me too
i was sucking the tears into my eyes as i was speaking

PSJ
Your officiant’s speech was beautiful. I was tearing up, too.

ying lei!
[IMG_46650.jpg]
[IMG_46651.jpg]
[IMG_46653.jpg]
kiss pics ^w^

zhuo小zhuo
Lol
I didn’t even see it happen through my tears
Damn
Life comes at ya fast

Ao Ying
[IMG_100578.jpg]
[IMG_100580.jpg]
[IMG_100589.jpg]
大老板 入赘了

Long Yu
哇 恭喜恭喜

Zhi Mei
大老板从来看不起任何澳门女子也有道理
老板娘像个画里实现出的一个人

Long Yu
我艹 你别让大老板听见了
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈

Wu Yan
恭喜
在哪里

Ao Ying
旧金山往北开两小时吧

Zhi Mei
既然大老板嫁出去了那今年他该发我们红包了吧

Long Yu
他妈 你想钱 还会想什么

zhao大哥
hope everyone got back safe
♥♥♥ thank you and i love you guys so much

xiaoxiao
we all made it back to the airbnb!
congrats again mr. married man!!!!
♥

Yan儿 ↦
[IMG_928976.jpg]
from the courtyard mirror right after ♥

↤ 我的lun子🍃
[IMG_74727.jpg]

Yan儿 ↦
omg
lockscreen already?

↤ 我的lun子🍃
Yeah
Not already
Always and always