Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

connie added jean, Sasha, marco and 11 others

connie: welcome guys, to the start of a friendship 

sasha: WAHH HECK YES!!

jean: why… i suffer a lot from you guys and now this?

eren: kys 

jean:…

armin: EREN! You can’t say that😾

eren: if it’s jean then I can!

mikasa: armin’s right Eren, you can’t tell someone to kts

eren:🙄

jean: thanks guys!

reiner: woah when was this made?

eren: omg minutes ago, keep up reiner🥱

marco: woah hello everyone!!

eren: hey marco!

jean: how come you’re nice to marco and not us??!

eren: first of all, I’m nice to mikasa and armin, and marco he is just the vibe, I fw him

marco: i fw you too, eren :D

ymir: waddup gays

historia: hi guys!

ymir: OMG MY WIFE IS HERE?? 

ymir: this gc might not be boring after all

connie: yeah because were so col😎

ymir: sure buddy!

bertholdt: what is this?…

sasha: A GC!!

sasha: AND HII MIKA 

mikasa: hello sasha!

jean: so is that everyone you added?

connie: we’re missing Annie 

reiner: good luck she’ll either leave or mute the gc

annie: good bye

annie left the gc

reiner: lol told you

connie added annie to the gc

connie: you can’t leave the gc annie, we’re going to be friends😋

annie: oh no what a nightmare

ymir: i like you

annie: thanks i like my gf

historia: omg yay! Another lesbian in the gc

ymir: so true babe, we just rock like that

historia: FRR😘

eren: ew

ymir: get out

marco: annie you should add your gf!!

annie: sure, I’ll ask her if she wants to join

jean: is anyone single here? Or just me

eren: just you

jean: fuck you

eren: erm i have a bf😹

armin: yes me!!

marco: what!? And you haven’t told me? Your nerdy friend

bertholdt: damn or me??💔

armin: SORRY GUYS😿

armin: I was going to tell you literally on the first day of school😞

reiner: wait eren and armin??

eren: yes?? Why got a problem with that?

reiner: no no I’m just surprised you could even get yourself in a relationship…

bertholdt: and especially a boyfriend

eren: WHAT

jean: LMFAOO

sasha: NO WAY BERT SAID THAT😭

annie: bold of you reiner, and where is your boyfriend?

reiner: …

annie: exactly 

ymir: YEAH YOU TELL HIM

historia: you’re actually funny annie!!

connie: lITERLY I’M ACTUALLY CRYING FROM LAUGHING

mikasa: I think it’s time to sleep, we start school tomorrow 

sasha: i don’t want to☹️

mikasa: I know sashs but we’ll see each other tomorrow!

sasha: wait yes, OK GOOD NIGHT EVERYONE🤗

connie: *cough* head over heels *cough*

sasha: at least I ain’t bald

connie: hey! My hair is growing to a buzz cut😵

marco: that’s nice! 

reiner: good night guys!

bertholdt: goodnight everyone

marco: sleep well!!

eren: nighty night😪

armin: GOOD NIGHT

Chapter Text

connie: ugh why is mr. Ackerman so hardcore 

marco: i thought he was one of the students…

reiner: FR I was just looking at him but he’s scary

marco: hey annie, have you asked your gf if she wants to join the gc?

annie: oh yeah

annie: connie make me admin

connie: why??

annie: do it

connie: yes ma’am🫡

annie added hitch

hitch: ohemgee hello!!

ymir: woah woah, hitch is your gf??!

hitch: fuck yeah i am! And an amazing gf

annie: you sure are

hitch: 💋

bertholdt: wait isn’t she the one with the wavy blonde hair you told me about?

annie: yup

reiner: WAIT

reiner: YOU TOLD BERTL AND NOT ME??

annie: yes, I would’ve told you, but all the time you kept talking about bert

bertholdt: wha?

reiner: well looky there, time to do hw!!

eren: go die, especially you jean

jean: TF?? What did I do to you

mikasa: he’s just not in the mood rn

marco: oh why’s that eren?

armin: his biologist teacher is his brother

sasha: WAIT, MR. JEAGER IS YOUR BROTHER?? ZEKE JEAGER??

historia: um sasha i think it was a bit obvious 

ymir: bro I had to sit next to the most annoying guy ever in Mr. Berner’s class

marco: ooo who?

ymir: some guy with hair looking from the movie Grease

reiner: porco…?

ymir: how do you know…?

bertholdt: he’s mine, reiner and annie’s friend! 

marco: you had another friend group…

armin: so you betrayed us…

bertholdt: oh no! But we did have a friend who is just like us, his name is Colt

marco: COLT GRICE??

bertholdt: yeah, you know him?

marco: I SIT NEXT TO HIM IN MATH CLASS

armin: BERT YOU NEED TO INTRODUCE HIM TO ME!! WE WOULD BE AN UNSTOPPABLE SQUAD >:)

marco: IKR OR BETTER ADD HIM TO THE GC

connie: YES MORE PEOPLE DO IT BERT AND REINER COME ON!

hitch: can I add two friends of mine

annie: no not them

sasha: THE MORE THE MERRIER 

reiner: well then connie make me and hitch admin

connie: yes sir🫡 wait I thought you were doing hw??

jean: i can not with you

reiner added 4 people to the gc 

hitch added 2 people to the gc

porco: wtf

pieck: omg hi everyone 

mikasa: OMG PIECK?? AS IN PIECK FINGER??

pieck: you know it😚

mikasa: I love your style so much

pieck: aww thank you!

sasha: HII MY NAME IS SASHA😋

pieck: hello sasha😽

colt: I got interrupted by being added to this gc?? I’m already in one

marco: COLT YOU REMEMBER ME?? FRECKLE GUY?!!

colt: OMG MARCO BODT?? YES HII OK I WILL BE STAYING IN THE GC

bertholdt: oh yeah I wanted to introduce you to one of my other friend

colt: oh? Where is he

armin: HI HELLO! MY NAME IS ARMIN

colt: HELLO! OK I LIKE YOU

ymir: beef head did you just add porco…?

porco: LMAOO BEEF HEAD

reiner: yes

reiner: you guys are going to make me miserable 

ymir: aww I’m glad!

porco: me too!

marcel: porco be nice

historia: HELLO EVERYONE!!

historia: hitch where are your friends?

hitch: oh they’re here, they just don’t want to talk

floch: uh leave me alone?

marlo: oh hi! 

jean: floch?? As in the ginger red head floch?

floch: oh how wonderful, jean is here

connie: MARLO HII YOU’RE THE BOWL CUT GUY RIGHT??

marlo: yes

connie added mina and thomas 

connie: guys these are the sweetest and awesome people i have met in Mr. Smith class

mina: aww thank you connie! And hello everyone 

thomas: hi

porco: seriously?

thomas: did i do something wrong?

ymir: all you said was hi, couldn’t you at least added an exclamation mark?

thomas: …

thomas: HI EVERYONE! I’M THOMAS!!!!🥰

marcel: i’m scared

colt: I love it here

MON 3:54PM

sasha: I HAVE AN IDEA

connie: WHT IS TIS?!

sasha: LETS SHARE A FUN FACT ABOUT OURSELVES 

connie: OMG YOU’RE SO SMART😝

sasha: I KNOW RIGHT😝

sasha: ok who wants to go first?

jean: I think eren should go

eren: HUH?? WHY ME

jean: because I told you? And here I thiught you were the smart one😐👎

eren: thiught

eren: anyways, let’s see, oh I got one

eren: i once stabbed a man to save mikasa

historia: WHAT

bertholdt: EXCUSE ME??

reiner: HELLO??

annie: how many times?

floch: WTF IS THAT TYPE OF QUESTION ANNIE😭

eren: i don’t exactly remember maybe 10?

armin: didn’t you say it was 15?

marco: 15??!

colt: let’s just go to the next person

eren: then you go

colt: ok! I have a little brother and his name is falco as in falcon!! And mine name is a type of horse!

eren: aww jean, we found your lost brother!!

jean: fuck you, ugh I’ll go next

jean: I’m the only child in my family 

ymir: boo 

jean: FUCK YOU TOO, WHY DON’T YOU GO ENXT

ymir: aw thanks I will! I was part of a cult which resulted my parents getting killed

historia: BABE YOU NEVER MENTIONED YOUR PARENTS WERE KILLED??

armin: WHAT NO WAY

marcel: A CULT AS A CHILD WTF

ymir: 😎

historia: I’ll go next…

historia: ok so I’m very rich and got acces to my dad’s credit card, but if he tries to get me in trouble he can’t

sasha: why not?

historia: i have so many things to blackmail him about, once he stole money from a company 

porco: WOAH

pieck: you’re awesome 

pieck: I’ll go next, I once ate a worm when I was little 

mikasa: how?

pieck: i still wonder that 

porco: i think reiner should go next

reiner: why me??

bertholdt: I agree with porco

reiner: bertl… how could you

ymir: reibert breakup🥀 

reiner: uh fun fact, I have a cousin name gabi and is friends with falco!

historia: yawn, marco go next

marco: ok!! I have a collection of mangas, and one of my favorites are aot and hxh!!

armin: ME NEXT

armin: i once fought a person on twitter

ymir: LMAOO WHAT

armin: no no for a good reason, he said deportation is a good thing

ymir: so armin do you still know the guys user?

armin: yeah I took a screenshot and tracked down where he lives and kinda threatened him with that!!

armin: I’ll dm you his user

sasha: I’ll go next!!

sasha: I once ate a moldy pizza

marcel: how are you alive?

sasha: :7

annie: marcel you talk a lot, you go next

marcel: I’m the only red head in my family💔

porco: can confirm, and my fun fact is that I got an eyebrow piercing without permission 

marcel: AND MOM TOOK AWAY ALL YOUR DEVICES 

marlo: I broke my ankle just by walking!

mina: I LOVE COLLECTING PLUSHIES AND APPARENTLY IN JAPANESE MY NAME MEANS BEAUTIFUL 

thomas: I play the piano

bertholdt: i sleep weird and I have a little brother who is also friends with gabi and falco, his name is udo

connie: sleep weird…tf does that mean?

reiner: he sometimes sleeps with his legs up, somewhat like a ballerina
reiner: your turn annie

annie: I hate you

annie: my dad bought me a fallen angel guitar and I have a younger sister name zofia who is friends with udo, gabi and falco

reiner: you mean love!!

annie: …

hitch: fun fact about me is that I was in a beauty pageant as a kid

mikasa: saving best for last😼

mikasa: i as well have a little brother and I got kidnapped but eren saved me

connie: ahem me?

connie: anyways, I drank alcohol as a baby which led me to the hospital and my parents don’t allow that relative to our house anymore☠️

jean: no wonder you’re like that…

Chapter Text

annie: not even a full first week of school and there is a fire drill wtf

reiner: FUCK THAT WHERE’S BERTL OH NO IF HE DIED I’LL DIE

bertholdt: reiner

reiner: BERTY I PLS DONT DIE I’LL SAVE YOU

berthodlt: REINER! I’M RIGHT HERE 

reiner: oh

ymir: LMAOO THIS MF IS HERE ACTING LIKE HE LOST THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE 

porco: ”BERTY YOUR KNIGHT IS HERE TO SAVE YOU”

reiner has left the chat

annie added reiner to the chat 

bertholdt/annie

bertholdt: omg was he really that worried about me?

annie: surprise, surprise 

bertholdt: HE REALLY DOES CARE FOR ME

annie: fucking confess to him already 

bertholdt: I think I will!!

annie: really?

bertholdt: no, my palms are already sweating just thinking about asking him out

bertholdt: and he’s probably straight :p

annie: you guys are such fucking idiots 

annie/reiner

reiner: I’m doing it

annie: doing what?

reiner: I’m going to ask bertl out on a date

reiner: telling him how I feel

annie: really?

reiner: YES! It’s time, maybe it’ll be a sign for jean and marco to start dating

annie: jean is oblivious so it might help

annie: anyways good luck

reiner: thanks!!

reiner/bertholdt

reiner: hey bertl

bertholdt: hello reiner!

bertholdt: is there something you want to say?

reiner: you know me so well

reiner: so how do I say this… IREALLYREQLLYLIKEYOUANDWASWONDERINGIFYOUWANTTOGOONADATEWITHME

bertholdt is typing 

reiner: HAHAYOUCANIGNORETHISLETSJUSTBEFRIENDS

bertholdt: NO

bertholdt: reiner, I really really like you! A lot, I just thought you didn’t like me and saw me as a friend. And I accept, I will go on a date with you :D

reiner: i’m going to cry, ILOVEYOU

bertholdt: I love you too!! <3

bertholdt: so when is the date or where at?

reiner: hmm what about saturday? And that is a surprise!

bertholdt: sorry, can we do sunday? I promised I would help out my dad and udo with a project

reiner: WAIT! We can do both, I can help you guys out and I’ll bring gabi too! :))

bertholdt: oh please, you’ll get very bored here :(

reiner: no I want to after all we are boyfriends right? ;) plus your dad loves me!! 

bertholdt: alr then!! I’ll see you at 11am ;)

reiner: 😽

fruit baskets

porco: FUCK YOU LESBIAN FRECKLED PONYTAIL

ymir: well who’s the single one here?

marcel: she’s not wrong porco

porco: YOU’RE MY BROTHER! BACK ME UP

armin: where’s bertholdt??

marco: and reiner?

mikasa: wait…

sasha: reiner…

pieck: bertholdt…

porco: DID REINER ASK BERT OUT??

marcel: FUCKING FINALLY 

colt: YEAH LETS GOO

pieck: now porco when are you going to ask out that special person~

porco: shut it pieck

eren: BERTHOLDT AND REINER??

jean: why are you here?

marco: not this again 

eren: FIRST OF ALL I CAN BE HERE WHENEVER I WANT! SECOND SHUT UP YOU SINGLE ASF

jean: well i feel sorry for that person 

armin: thats me he’s dating :3

marco: ouch

marco: but jean you’ll find the right person believe me!! 0:)

jean: yeah, i think I did 

connie: gag, barf

jean: FUCK YOU CONNIE

connie: I was just expressing my feelings😕👎

bertholdt: hey guys!!

armin: BERTHOLDT 

marco: YOU’RE

colt: BACK

annie: goodbye

connie: where you going annie?👀

hitch: we’re to have movie night since we finished all our homework😝

floch: goodbye won’t miss ya!!

historia: are you hating on women ginger looking like ed sheeran bitch?

ymir: let’s get married 

marlo: oh no, he’s just hater when he sees a happy couple and because he’s single

floch: I hate you

marlo: 🥀

reiner: wow you guys sure did miss me

ymir: mmm no not really

porco: not even the ants misses you

bertholdt: well me and reiner have something to tell you guys!!

reiner: WE ARE OFFICIALLY A COUPLE <3

eren: HAHA NOW JEAN AND PORCO ARE THE SINGLE ONES

armin: you do know that there are others here that are as well single, right renren? 

eren: ofc I did!!

sasha: yup!! Unlike me and my mika😽

mikasa: ❤️

hitch: ok… well goodbye!!

annie: yeah ig bye

pieck: live laugh love wlw 

historia: WLW‼️

connie: AND WE GOT THE SECOND MLM IN THE CHAT

bertholdt: :)

reiner: FUCK YEAH SUCK IT PORCO

porco: 🖕

mikasa: ok we need to go to sleep guys or else Mr. Ackerman will get piss if we fall asleep in his class and give us more homework 

sasha: NOOO

jean: end me

eren: gladly 

mikasa: go to sleep, goodnight.

everyone is now offline

Chapter Text

sasha: A FOOD FAIR NEXT WEEK AT SCHOOL??

sasha: this is my destiny, sorry guys you might not be able to buy much food😋

connie is typing

sasha: if you’re going to call me a fatass I will knock you down 

connie: …

connie: bff I was just agreeing with you😔

marco: omg I heard there were going to be selling funnel cakes🤤

mikasa: I really hope they will be selling ice creams!!

sasha: my mika I’ll buy you as much as ice creams you want!!😼

mikasa: you’re so sweet sashs❤️

jean/sasha/connie

jean: guys I’m going to ask out marco, to the food fair

connie: 🤯

sasha: 🙀

connie: FUCKING FINALLY

sasha: our jean boy is already grown up😿

jean: yeah yeah, but I need help, how do I ask him out?

connie: duh ask him out by talking, using your mouth and tounge🙌😹

sasha: FR ITS NOT LIKE ITS HARD🙄👎

jean: why do I even hang out with you people 

jean: omg marco just texted me

sasha: WHAT DID HE SAY

connie: jean where did you go😿

jean: hold up

marco/jean

marco: hey jean!!

jean: hi marc!! Can I call you marc? I know ymir does but I was just wondering, it’s ok if not ofc

marco: aww maybe you can but don’t say it in front of ymir she is the one that gave me the nickname

marco: anyways I wanted to ask you a question 

jean/sasha/connie

jean: he is going to ask me a question 

marco/jean

jean: go on

marco: i just wanted to ask you if you want to go to the food fair with me. Like on a date?

jean: you want to go on a date…with me?

marco: yeah! I’ve like you for quite a while and I thought this would be an opportunity to ask you out!!

marco: jean you ok? You haven’t been responding. Oh I get it, sorry!! You don’t have to go out with me but pls let’s still be friends 

jean: omg I’m sorry, but yes! I want to go out with you!!

marco: really? :))

jean: yeah :)

jean/sasha/connie

connie: so what was the question🙂

jean: jean kirstein officially has a date 

sasha: WOAH DID MARCO ASK YOU OUT??

jean: yep thank goodness cause I would have chickened out 

fruit baskets

tue 11:53 am

connie: attention @everyone

connie: i have made a plan on how to ditch Mr. Ackerman’s class😝

hitch: how do you have a brain?

floch: he probably doesn’t🙃

marlo: just cotton and dust bunnies😀

connie: DAMN LEAVE ME ALONE

connie: marlo I thought we had something special🥺

floch: marlo? Is this true?

marlo: eh not really

connie: GASP

connie: all these times helping me with the math homework and this is how you think of us😔

marlo: mf you copy from me☠️

eren: LMAOO

armin: so what is this amazing plan of yours connie?

connie: right

connie: so once class starts in about 12 minutes I’ll tell Mr. Ackerman that I have a tummy ache and I really REALLY need to go to the bathroom, and then I’ll just stay there til the end of the period :3

ymir: oh my goodness that is an amazing plan

connie: IKR

pieck: oh sweet connie

connie: hm?

marcel: ymir was being sarcastic 

connie: WHAT

ymir: 😐

colt: you really are ykw I’m not finishing the sentence 

bertholdt: dense

connie: tú también bertholdt😿

bertholdt: sí, me sorprende que tú sabes español

connie: sí sí😅

bertholdt: yeah nvm

reiner: hey colt, annie you want to bring falco and zofia over to my house after school?
reiner: My mom is gone for the week, she said no kids allowed but idrc👎 

colt: omg yes!!

historia: zamn mommy issues?? So real

annie: yeah sure why not

mikasa: can I ask you a question, Reiner?

reiner: duh yes!!

mikasa: how old is gabi and her friends

reiner: oh they’re all 12!!

colt: falco is the oldest since his bday is on February 

bertholdt: and udo is the youngest his bday is on October!!

annie: why do you ask, mikasa?

mikasa: I was just wondering if my brother can hang out with them, he’s been talking about how cool and fun they are

reiner: then bring him over!! Plus the rest of us are going to do hw/play video games!!

mikasa: oh thanks you guys!

12:03pm

porco: why is Mr. Berner talking about Mx Zoë?

ymir: and this is why you’re so oblivious when someone gives obvious signals🤦🏽‍♀️

eren: fr🤦🏻‍♂️

ymir: didn’t you run away when armin kissed you for the first time??

eren: …

marcel: i have to agree with ymir again 

porco: bitch🤬

sasha: ooo Mr. Berner is in love~

jean: speaking of love 

eren: um and who loves you??

marco: ME!! >:)

armin: what 

bertholdt: the

colt: fuck

ymir: JEAN WAS YOUR SECREY CRUSH? MARC YOU COULD DO BETTER

jean: alr fuck you ymir and historia because you’re going to defend your wife, fuck you too annie and hitch and floch, you too reiner😐👎

floch: 🖕

mina: AWW CONGRATS MARCO AND JEAN

thomas: ayeee congrats guys😎👍

thomas: be happy for who you love and what you love

sasha: hell yeah thomas!!

connie: guys wish me luck on this plan🙏

everyone: … 

connie: 🥀💔

1:23 pm 

jean: so connie…

annie: learned anything??

pieck: this is exciting

porco: ikr

colt: pock you’ll get caught too

marcel: yep 

porco: you’re right colt, I’ll for sure won’t do that

colt: I hope so!!

connie: as of today i will never EVER ditch Mr. Ackerman’s class

sasha: best frend you need to think to ditch mx zoë’s class or Mr. Zacharias pe class🙏🙏

connie: omg you’re right but I have Ms. Nanaba for pe and she is sharp💔

mikasa: no you shouldn’t be ditching school or class

sasha: mika is right connie forget what I said you shouldn’t be ditching🙅‍♀️

connie: ☠️

sasha: anyways mmm food fair soon🤤

Chapter Text

sasha: OMG FOOD FAIR FOOD FAIR

sasha: ok who’s going?

floch: I think everyone’s going 

sasha: did not ask you

floch: uhh don’t care, at least i answered

connie: wait mikasa who was that man that dropped you off at school? The one with the weird cowboy hat

mikasa: hm? 
mikasa: OH! THATS MY UNCLE KENNY, THE BEST UNCLE EVER WELL MORE LIKE MY GREAT UNCLE BUT STILL THE BEST

jean: idk that does not sound like mikasa at all

sasha: my mika are you ok? Didn’t you say he would sometimes be a pain in the ass??

reiner: my mika?? Ok… idk about y’all but that man sounds like fun

sasha: stfu reiner, I don’t say anything when you start talking about bertl every time we walk to chemistry😐

marco: sasha i don’t think that’s mikasa or reiner…

sasha: DID THEY GET KIDNAPPED??

annie: those two are strong, it’s unlikely of them getting kidnapped

bertholdt: I think mikasa is stronger, so if they do get kidnapped it is likely mikasa will be the one saving reiner

ymir: bertl just say you hate your bf

porco: yeah bertl, why be with him if you’re just going to hate🤦

colt: erm, porco you say that as if you aren’t in love with my brother

marcel: LMAOO

porco: I’ll go die now 

reiner: FALCO

colt: I MEAN UHH… yeah ok sorry guys

hitch: wait so that means annie is zofia??

annie: yeah, hi hitch

hitch: omg hii zofia, did annie let you use her phone??

annie: haha no, stole it from her

bertholdt: yeah we all did!!

marco: OMG HI UDO!!

armin: UDO?? HELLO

bertholdt: HII GUYS

ymir: so you guys already know each other?

marco: yep!! He is such a genius

historia: so if that’s not mikasa, who is that?

eren: ohh i know who it is now

marcel: so are you going to say??

eren: oh ig…

eren: it’s mikasa’s little brother

mikasa: frick🥀 

armin: kaito??

mikasa: hi, yes it’s me 

hitch: if you’re a kind soul, I suggest to not hang out with gabi

mikasa: huh why? I was the one that wanted to hang out with them!!

colt: yes this is true

pieck: falco, where is your brother?

colt: oh he’s doing hw with reiner, bertl, annie and mikasa!! And they’re helping each other out 

historia: we so need to have a study group 

marlo: yes especially for the people who copies the answers from someone else… cough connie cough

connie: HEY it’s called a learning technique😞

marlo: more like a learning

marlo: ykw I really have nothing to say

reiner: you guys are really boring, anyways who wants to join the gabi gang??😝

bertholdt: gabi gang!

annie: gabi gang!

colt: gabi gang!

mikasa: gabi gang!

floch: make them stop

mina: shut up, they’re cutie patooties 

thomas: no

Chapter Text

sasha: okay who’s already planning their food route bc i am

mikasa: just excited for the ice cream!!

sasha: like I said, I’ll buy you all the ice cream you want😘

eren: so where are we meeting?? Cause if any of you guys are late, me and armin are not gonna wait for you😹👎

armin: front gates at noon. i made a schedule if anyone wants it

jean: you made a SCHEDULE???

marco: he showed it to me it has snack breaks and “hydration reminders” and honestly its really helpful?!!

mina: ARMIN CAN YOU SEND THE SCHEDULE I WILL NEED IT🙏🙏

armin: YES YES OK!!

reiner: bert and i are starting with the soft pretzels. we’ve been dreaming of this day

bertholdt: he literally wrote about it in his english essay

ymir: we’re only going if historia doesn’t get mobbed at the churro booth again

historia: i can’t help it if i’m beloved

connie: i’m showing up with 2 empty pockets and a dream

thomas: that’s just sad

marcel: that dream better be buying snacks not mooching off porco again

porco: he’s not allowed near my wallet this year

colt: good call honestly

hitch: annie and i will be late bc SOMEONE sleeps like a corpse

annie: be grateful i’m coming at all

floch: marlo and i will get there early and claim a bench so we don’t end up sitting on the grass like last year

marlo: not the grass slander

[later that evening]

pieck: okay i’m adding someone new to the gc, hope that’s cool

pieck had added yelena to the group chat 

yelena: thank you for welcoming me. the food was strange and beautiful. i feel changed.

sasha: UGH YOU GET IT

porco: wait hold on

marcel: LMAOOO ohhhhhh this is yelena

porco: pieck’s yelena??

pieck: …she’s just a cool transfer okay calm down

reiner: ohhh no she got that tone

bertholdt: she did. confirmed.

ymir: she scares me a little. i respect it.

jean: anyway what was everyone’s top booth. i’m still thinking about that deep fried ice cream sandwich

armin: probably the taiyaki stand. sasha tried to steal one from a kid

sasha: IT FELL OUT OF HIS HAND

connie: ok but can we talk about the REAL tea

marco: oh no

connie: i saw mr. smith and mr. ackerman holding hands by the kettle corn

jean: NO YOU DIDN’T

connie: i SWEAR ON MY SNACK TICKETS they were standing close and then boom HANDS. locked

reiner: wait like fingers laced??

connie: FULL. INTERLOCK. it was romantic. also terrifying.

historia: i saw them too. levi was smiling. kind of. in his levi way.

ymir: someone write a fanfic

hitch: i already started one. chapter one is called “powdered sugar promises”

porco: i hate all of you

marcel: yeah? well i saw you and colt holding hands behind the corn dog stand sooo

colt: what

porco: WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT IN HERE

sasha: WAIT YOU HELD HANDS???🙀

marco: AWWWW😿

mikasa: was it a warm handhold or like awkward and clammy

marcel: it was definitely warm. i’d say… confident. with a touch of gay panic

porco: YOU’RE DEAD

marcel: sorry sorry sorry but I have to admit, it was cute🤧🤧

colt: he’s gonna kill you but like. gently. with affection.

reiner: can’t believe porco went from “don’t touch my wallet” to “here’s my hand”

bertholdt: beautiful character arc

yelena: hand-holding is a sacred ritual. i commend your courage

pieck: yelena gets it

connie: SHE REALLY DOES

jean: ok i vote we do this every year. food fair. holding hands. weird romance. full chaos.

annie: not a bad tradition tbh

marlo: agreed. next year i’m starting with dessert

hitch: next year i’m bringing a flask of espresso. y’all are exhausting

armin: i already started planning for next year. spreadsheet coming soon

eren: you need to be stopped

armin: WHAT

eren: I still love you😽

armin: 😽😽❤️

floch: ew couples

marlo: you’re not the only single one here yk??

floch: that can change ;)

marlo: tf?? End me now

thomas: love this gc

mina: IKR its so entertaining 

Chapter Text

marcel: weird, reiner hasn’t been active for a while 

bertholdt: oh it’s because he’s finally practicing for football!! 

ymir: wait since when was it football season??

historia: babe I told you it started last week…

ymir: oh… I just remembered that your cheer practice started last week😪

sasha: GUYS GUYS COME BACK

connie: bff what happened??

mikasa: are you hurt, sashs?? Where are you??

sasha: I just got out of detention😣

mikasa: what?? Why, what happened?

sasha: ok but just so you know IT AIN’T MY FAULT👎👎

sasha: I decided to be smart and go ask Mr. Ackerman for help on today’s math homework and when I opened the door… I saw Mr. Smith and Mr. Ackerman kissing😿 AND HE WAS ON SITTING ON THE DESK I DO NOT WANT TO TALK ABOUT🥀🥀 the reason I got detention was because I didn’t knock the door😑

connie: AT SCHOOL?? THEY WERE KISSINF?? Couldnt THEU wait once THEH for home😢

jean: honestly not even shocked😐👎

pieck: old men yaoi, love it

colt: ofc you do, you’re so ugh nvm forget it

pieck: exactly, shut your mouth I got big secrets from you that I can just spill😈😈

colt: like??

pieck: hey guys, I need to tell you the WILDEST thing colt said about porco

colt: WAIT WAIT NO I TAKE IT BACK, YOU ARE NOT WIERD YOU ARE AWESOME AND THE BEST EVER 

porco: ok I need to know now, what did he say??

marcel: you’re so hopeless, porco

porco: TF?? LEAVE ME ALONE 

eren: guys… my brother wants to come over my house…

ymir: and I should care because…??

eren: FIRST OF ALL FUCK YOU

hitch: HEY! Are you being sexist now?? Armin I thought you taught him better🙄 and imagine how disappointed your mom would feel if she saw how you talk to women, tsk tsk tsk

eren: …

eren: sorry ymir for telling you, fuck you

hitch: thats more like it

annie: marry me

hitch: ofc bbg, here’s your ring, 💍💋💋

historia: HELL YEAH HITCH

mikasa: that was awesome how you told him, hitch 

hitch: ladies ladies, I love all this glaze but my heart only belongs to one😽😽

armin: and don’t worry hitch!! Me and his mother are going to give him a lecture🤞🤞

hitch: ok good!

eren: so back to what I was saying…

eren: HE CAN NOT COME

marco: why not??

eren: bc WHAT IF HE TELLS OUR PARENTS THAT HE’S MY BIOLOGY TEACHER🙁

armin: YOU HAVEN’T TOLD THEM??

eren: no, why would I??

marlo: ok yeah nvm goodbye 

floch: take me with you😓

marlo: lol no :p

hitch: LMAOO

an hour later

reiner: just got back from practice AND I HATE THIS COACH 

bertholdt: what happened, rei?? 

reiner: coach is such a bitch i swear to god

connie: who’s ur couch??

thomas: LMAOO COUCH!?😭

reiner: magath

everyone typing…

sasha: WAIT I THOUGHT YOUR COACH WAS MR SHADIS??

ymir: omg not that man, I HATE HIM

marco: wasn’t he the one who subbed for Mr. Zacharias and then made porco run the entire period for being “too mouthy”??

porco: ALL I ASKED WHERE WAS MR. ZACHARIAS WTF😭

colt: he also made us do pushups bc pieck yawned one time

pieck: i was TIRED and i did it silently

yelena: where can I find this man?

annie: he made me run laps for “bad posture”

marlo: he told me my socks were “too optimistic” i still don’t know what that means

mina: he kicked thomas out of dodgeball for “excessive blinking”

thomas: i have allergies bro

historia: hearing all this is actually makinf me think he is a bad guy 

ymir: darling darling, HE IS THE BIGGEST BITCH IN THIS WHOLE DAMN SCHOOL

reiner: i literally can’t breathe around him without being told to drop and give him 30

jean: can we just ban him

connie: petitio to replace magath with coach shadis🙌🙌

eren: shadis terrifying but fair. magath just hates joy

mikasa: coach shadis is strict but not at magath strict level

sasha: magath saw me eat a granola bar and told me i “chew like a criminal”

marcel: what does that even MEAN

armin: atp he’s just a hater of happiness and fun😒

20 minutes later

hitch: btw I’m going to add someone, me, marlo, floch and my bae annie agreed to it and so did he

floch: he’s cool don’t be weird

eren: you CAN’T be talking about being weird☠️

annie: he’s chill. kind of quiet. kinda cursed.

marlo: his name’s boris

hitch has added boris to the chat

boris: hi. i heard magath got ratio’d in here

connie: what kind of name is boris??😹😹

boris: what kind of name is constance??😹😹

connie: RHAT NOT MY BAME

sasha: ok so… where are we hanging out this weekend?😋

annie: idk

floch: i say the arcade‼️

hitch: but it smells like so bad :(

sasha: so does connie and we still let him hang

connie: OK WTF😕 LEAVE ME ALONE🤧🤧

jean: what about the diner on 3rd? the one with the giant milkshakes?

marco: yesss and the curly fries. i vote that and we can share a giant milkshake :D

jean: YES EVERYONE VOTE DINER 

eren: down bad🥱🥱

jean: saying that when you definitely want to share a milkshake with armin🤢

mikasa: they also have booths. sasha likes booths.

sasha: AWW MIKA😿 AND YES I DO

mina: i’m down for diner vibes

thomas: me too. as long as no one eats my fries again

armin: that was eren

eren: MIN WHY WOULD YOU OUT ME LIKE THAT🙁 

eren: and i was tasting them for poison

reiner: i just want to eat a big fat burger 

bertholdt: that does sound delicious 

colt: YES BURRITO🤤🤤

porco: COLT🤤🤤

porco deleted a message 

marcel: too late porco, took the screenshot ;)

pieck: uhh then the diner it is ig

sasha: boris what’s your stance on curly fries

boris: firmly pro

ymir: oh he’s staying

pieck: welcome to the chaotic gc you’ll ever experience 

boris: happy to be here. do i bring snacks or trauma?

eren: both. preferably layered

yelena: mostly trauma :)

porco: you scare me

Chapter Text

armin: so mikasa didn’t walk with me and renren… do any of you guys know where she went or was??

marco: no bc sasha and connie weren’t with me and jean

sasha: oh sorry guys!! Me and kasa are at the hospital!! Well not a good thing but yeah

bertholdt: let me guess, connie??

connie: you’re like so smart bertholdt, how’d you know??

bertholdt: had a feeling thats all!! :))

sasha: bozo broke his right ankle🧍‍♀️

reiner: wtf how??

mikasa: he tripped trying to jump over a trash can outside the gym

connie: ok in my defense i thought i could make it🤕

ymir: why tf were you trying to jump a trash can in the first place

connie: vibes🔥🔥

historia: be serious

connie: no literally i just wanted to see if i could

thomas: you couldn’t

mina: i actually thought you were more durable than this tbh

annie: me too. thought you were one of those unbreakable idiots

hitch: like the kind of dumb that protects your bones

floch: i’ve seen this man fall off his skateboard into a bush and walk it off

porco: WAIT HE CAN SKATE??

boris: wasn’t he the one who once tried to ride his bike down the school stairs and then got suspended for a week bc riding bicycles are not allowed in school??!

yelena: yes. and survived. so this is anticlimactic

armin: wait so he’s back home now??

mikasa: yeah, he’s on the couch eating ice cream and watching cooking shows

sasha: he made me put his sock on for him bc he “couldn’t face the trauma”

connie: self care 🙏

historia: omg we should go visit him!!

colt: FRICK YEAH!! it’s friday anyway😋😋

marcel: we could watch a movie or something

porco: this is the smartest thing you have ever said 

reiner: yeah let’s all just hang out at his place tonight

pieck: this will be fun!!

bertholdt: will this be like a sleep over?

connie: FUCK YEAH

mina: dibs on sitting next to the snack table

thomas: dibs on picking the movie

annie: no. last time u picked the live-action sonic movie and i HATE that blue hedgehog 

hitch: yeah we’re voting this time

marlo: can i bring popcorn or is that already covered

sasha: bring it. connie already ate half the bag i made

connie: it was for emotional healing

floch: marlo can you bring me the big bag of sun chips😿😿

marlo: yeah yeah I can🤞

floch: THANK YOU😭😭😭🔫🔫

marlo: was that emoji necessary??!

floch: yes!

eren: btw random but now my parents won’t stop bullying me bc zeke is my biology teacher

armin: here we go

eren: my dad literally went “say hi to your big bro” and winked. i almost left the house

mikasa: carla asked if he lets you cheat on tests “as a family thing”

sasha: they’re unhinged and i love them🥹🥹

eren: zeke called on me to answer a question and said “don’t disappoint mom and dad” IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS

bertholdt: i would drop out

reiner: no like?? i’d fake my own death

porco: they’re gonna put that on your graduation cake. “congrats eren, zeke’s little bro”

connie: someone make shirts that say “i survived zeke’s class”

jean: make eren wear one to family dinner

eren: i will fight all of you. even with connie’s crutches

armin: so sleepover at connie’s tonight?? like 7ish?

historia: YES!! I’ll bring some skincare products for us!!

ymir: babe you’re so prettiness and sweet omg I love you

historia: 💋💋

colt: I’LL BRING SOME DRINKS!!

pieck: i’ll bring those cookies everyone liked last time

boris: i’ll bring uno in case the movie sucks

pieck: omg let me bring my monopoly board game!!

yelena: i’m just here for the chaos. and the broken ankle updates and to talk to pieck :)

mikasa: we’ll be here. connie’s not moving anyway lol

connie: wheel me to the fun or i riot

sasha: he’s already threatened to throw the remote at me 3 times

marco: this is going to be fun!!

jean: yeah cause you’ll be there <3

eren: gag 

armin: eren…

eren: :(

bertoldt: connie, what about your parents and siblings??

connie: oh my parents said it was ok!! As long as my siblings can be with us🥀🥀

marco: AWW THATA SWEET and they’re well behaved so it’ll be ok!!

marcel: wait guys…

porco: marcel…

marcel: don’t we have to be studying for civics.??

reiner: FUCK

armin: let’s just bring our civics notes!! And we can study 

eren: yes!! Also mikasa, me and min are stopping by your house to pick up your pjs

marco: yeah me and jean are also picking up your pjs sasha!!😽

sasha: AHH THANK YOU GUYS😽😽

connie: ts is going to be so fun 

Chapter Text

jean: wow it really is so quiet w/o connie

sasha: IKR i hate it, and he never even told me he wasn’t going to come😿

armin: its so rare of him to not to come 

porco: wait he didn’t come?? Well Marco, guess ms. Nanaba class won’t be good for this game

marco: trust porco we WILL win

marcel: yeah don’t get too happy✌️✌️

connie: hey guys

sasha: oh🙀

eren: my🙀

reiner: golly gee🙀

ymir: thanks for ruining it reiner

porco: meet me behind the school

reiner OK OK SORRY

reiner: can’t a teenage boy just joke around?🤒

porco: hmm let me think about it 

ymir: no

mikasa: anyways, how come you didn’t come to school, connie?

connie: i just… idk…didn’t wanna deal w ppl today lol

connie: my ankle hurts like hell, i barely slept last night, and i couldn’t even get my sweats on without falling over💀

colt: that must’ve been frustrating :(

colt: u good now?

connie: eh. still annoyed

connie: it’s dumb but i feel like a useless loser for missing school

mina: nooo😭 stop that

thomas: literally no one thinks of that of you

pieck: yes!! just because you have a broken bone doesn’t mean you’re useless loser and it’s not the end of the world😽

hitch: we’ve all missed school for worse reasons tbh

annie: like that time floch skipped bc of a bad haircut

floch: AND I STAND BY THAT😾

marlo: lowkey u did look like a dehydrated mushroom that day

reiner: i think you’re the only dude i’ve ever seen cry in the mirror🥀

bertholdt: i mean it wasn’t that bad!!

porco: bertholdt… ¡no digas mentiras!

bertholdt: oh wow porco, entonces sí estás tomando español enserio

floch: what are you guys saying??

bertholdt: oh that your haircut wasn’t that ugly!!

floch: aww thank you guys!!

armin: like we were saying, it’s ok connie, don’t be negative towards yourself, ok?? :D

connie: thank you guys, i do feel a little better now

sasha: can we come over or nah, cnot like full hangout but like… soft visit😋😋

mikasa: we’ll drop off notes and stay for like an hour tops

jean: i got ur math hw it’s ugly

marco: i got ur chem sheet too!! it’s worse😿

connie: pls do

connie: parents are at work i’m bored as hell and everything on netflix is mid rn

yelena: group field trip to the land of limp

boris: dibs on the beanbag if it’s open🔥

ymir: we also got so much teacher drama to tell

historia: OMG YES, WITH MR BERNER AND MX HANGE 

porco: OH AND WITH MR YEAGER WITH MR ACKERMAN

hitch: WAIT WEREN’T THERE BEEF BETWEEN MR ZACHARY AND MR PYXIS??

connie: NOT MY FAVORITE YAOI💔💔

everyone: …

sasha: so…

eren: we’ll be over by 15 mins connie…

marcel: try to stand by the door when i text you we’re close by…

historia: just get ready…

yelena: chaotic as always, love it

Chapter Text

sasha: GUYS GUYS GUESS WHAT

jean: it’s 8 in the morning sasha, better be good

sasha: CONNIE IS BACK!! CONNIE IS BACK!!🥳🥳

mikasa: he is??

connie: YES I AM BACK🔥🔥

marco: YAYAY WELCOME BACK!!

colt: how are you feeling now? :)

connie: very me, very good, muy bien😼

bertholdt: very good and muy bien are the same thing, connie…

connie: sure!!

bertholdt: ay dios mío 

porco: too bad your ankle is still broken, Ms. Nanaba’s class lost last time, and they’ll lose again✌️✌️

marco: YEAH

marcel: not now porco

porco: you’re no fun

few minutes later

connie: guys I just came up with the best idea ever🤑🤑

historia: can’t believe I’m saying this, but tell

connie: what if I ditch Mr. Ackerman’s class?? 😼

historia: what 

hitch: the 

ymir: fuck

reiner: connie did you learn anything from last time??

annie: I wouldn’t bother, he has a brain size of a worm

floch: or walnut

marlo: or maybe he has no brain

floch: omg you’re so funny😹😹

marlo: right…

armin: why would you want to do that, connie?? Remember you are injured

connie: EXACTLY 

connie: he won’t get me in trouble because of my injury😛

eren: connie, oh connie

mikasa: you do realize that won’t help, he’ll still give you detention 

pieck: connie, don’t listen to these haters, I think you could get away with it!!🥰

yelena: I love the way you think 

connie: thank you pieck, you’re a real one🥹🥹

porco: are we not gonna talk about what yelena just told pieck??

pieck: err i lowkey forgot to tell you guys that me and yelena are dating!!

historia: WHAT

colt: THE

porco: FUCK

after lunch time

thomas: wow cafeteria was louder today bc connie wouldn’t shut up

mina: ikr i actually missed it being loud

boris: you actually missed it??

connie: ok guys wish me luck!!

marlo: more like prayers

hitch: you’ll need them 

20 minutes later 

jean: connie wtf☠️

marco: pls stop this 

ymir: what’s happening?? 

sasha: FRICKING 8 BALL HEAD GOT DETENTION 

marcel: HELP 8 BALL??😭😭

porco: smh this is why Mr. Berner is the better math teacher🤦🏼

armin: he let’s you guys skip??

colt: oh no, on the first day of school he said if we ever think of skipping his class he will make a contract with our parents to clean mx hange’s class, and their hamsters cage 

ymir: and idk how but he will take away our phone and give it to our parents💔💔

eren: but he is nice right??

marcel: YESS

bertholdt: wait ymir I thought your parents are dead??

Chapter Text

ymir: okay mr. dok really got me messed up thinking i’m gonna write a whole essay on a thursday😐

sasha: can’t we just say food history and call it a day😕

mikasa: if we do that you’re gonna end up writing about potatoes again

sasha: but…mika😞

jean: wait what even are the options again😭 i wasn’t paying attention

eren: of fucking course you weren’t paying attention 

marco: he handed out a packet, I can send it if you want?? :))

jean: OMG YES YOU’RE A LIFE SAVER BABE I LOVE YOU😭😭❤️❤️

marco: LOVE YOU TOO😽😽

armin: well there’s a list of topics like revolutions, empires, wars, ancient civilizations… stuff like that

eren: “wars” it is then. we write about punching. easy

armin: ren… you’ll get a 0

bertholdt: yep and mr. dok will start talking about “how violence is a bad” and we’ll be there until the bell rings💔

porco: ok but hear me out… cold war… because i already have a google doc from last year🤫

colt: that’s cheating, porco

porco: wait yes, you’re right, cheating is bad

ymir: bruh just kiss already👎👎

pieck: i second the cold war idea. we can use porco’s doc and then just vibe🤞

marcel: y’all are already trying to take shortcuts and we haven’t even picked a topic😭

yelena: I’ll be doing actual war, world war 2

historia: hmm, maybe I’ll do the Tudor era

connie: guys… what if… we go over someone’s house to talk about which historical events we’ll all do?? 

marlo: omg so you do have a brain🥹

floch: proud of you connie🙁

hitch: they grow up so fast🥹🥹

boris: now this is a historical moment 

annie: wait which house are we going over then?

historia: mine!! ymir’s already coming early to help me clean the living room😋

ymir: yes I am, because I am a good gf💋

floch: 😭😭🔫🔫

mina: can i bring cookies?? i made some

thomas: you made cookies?? YESYES your cookies are top tier 

mina: THANK YOU😇

floch: y’all are talking about snacks but we still haven’t picked a topic☠️

marlo: we’ll pick it tonight. chill. let’s talk about something actually important rn

boris: like what

sasha: best anime of all time, obviously🙄

connie: FINALLY😤

connie: listen… chainsaw man clears all

jean: wrong

marco: he’s gonna say one piece. watch.

jean: ONE PIECE clears 

marco: jean… as much as I love you, I have to choose hxh😓

eren: facts. gear 5 alone makes it top 1

armin: okay but…Steins;Gate is peak writing

eren: and peak boring, sorry min 

mikasa: what about banana fish

sasha: MIKA☹️☹️ why would you bring that up i’m not emotionally stable rn

hitch: y’all are so dramatic. it’s literally death note

annie: i agree

hitch: sigh luv ya😘

annie: ❤️

ymir: jjk has me in a chokehold tbh idc and the guy she was interested in wasn't a guy at all, even if it’s a manga

historia: wait same. i literally cried watching shibuya arc😭

reiner: what about aot tho😭😭

bertholdt: lowkey traumatic

pieck: like do we count that as entertainment or therapy

porco: therapy is crazy lmao that show gave me anxiety

colt: but it also gave us levi

sasha: levi is literally my idol

connie: he looks like mr. Ackerman tho💀

armin: and he scares everyone except erwin

eren: he doesn’t scare me idc

mikasa: last time when me, armin and you went walking home you started crying about how levi yelled at you after class

eren: MIKASA

jean: LMAOO

connie: NO WAY😭😭

marco: I’m sorry for laughing, eren

hitch: not me

porco: or me

ymir: and me

mina: okay okay but for real best anime is mob psycho no one argue

thomas: i’ll allow it

boris: honorable mention: blue lock 

ymir: idc anri is so fine🤤

historia: the only women in blue lock💔

sasha: let’s all bring our anime opinions tonight too we’re making a tier list😾

annie: so we’re not doing the project huh

marlo: we’ll pretend to work for 30 mins then spend 2 hours yelling about anime😁

floch: if i come and y’all start arguing about one piece again i’m leaving

jean: no one invite floch

connie: i’m bringing takis btw

sasha: W CONNIE 🙏 BRING THE BIG BAGS

connie: also can we talk about how i finally showed up to school 3 days in a row like that’s growth

marco: we’re all so proud of you😭

pieck: YES!! Don’t let your injury stop you, fw it’ll heal soon!!

yelena: you got this

connie: ok that message from yelena, I feel honored😿

connie: i even answered a question in class today

porco: yeah and you said “the roman empire ended because they ran out of soup”

connie: and i was CLOSE😒

marcel: please never change

historia: OKK see you guys at 6!!! bring snacks and laptop chargers🙏

annie: i’m only coming for the cookies and hitch

floch: if someone plays anime ops on the speaker i’ll stay longer

Chapter Text

marco: thats it everyone here is getting blocked

connie: bruh WHAT??

sasha: not us, right marco?? We’re ogs🥹

marco: sasha, you’ll be the first

mikasa: don’t talk to my gf like that

sasha: MY MIKAAA🤧🤧

marco: DON’T test me mikasa, I’ll block you right after

eren: MARCO😭 what happened??

armin: i think I might know…

colt: wait is it about that manga??

bertholdt: oh no, guys hide NOW

jean: yeah, he’s been so excited to get his fav hxh manga just for the store not having it

marco: I’VE BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO IT AND ALL OF A SUDDEN THEY ARE OUT OF THE MANGA ?! I SWEAR I’LL BEAT SOMEONE🔫 

marco: REINER PULL UP NOW👊🏻

reiner: BRUH😭😭 WHAT DID I DO?!

ymir: marco, I never been prouder🥹🥹

porco: you’ve been taught right🙂‍↕️

historia: yes, we are proud of you, marco😽

marcel: bertholdt? Aren’t you going to defend your bf??

bertholdt: …

reiner: BABE??

marlo: 😧

floch: yk marlo… if we were together I’d defend you🫣

marlo: keep on dreaming

hitch: LMAOO

annie: reiner, be careful, he actually boxes in his free time, i train him btw

reiner: ANNIE?? TF??😓

hitch: DONT TALK TO HER LIKE THAT

reiner: 🤐

boris: is marco actually that strong??

bertholdt: yes, hence i can’t defend, rei, forgive me💔

reiner: it’s ok, bertie, I’ll give you a kiss for good luck🙁

ymir: it’s the other way around, idiot

historia: dw babe, he’s a jock!!

eren: that sounds like an insult 

historia: I’ll also beat you up😇

eren: SORRY GEEZ

marcel: marco, we should talk about this, remember violence is never the answer

marco: SHUT IT YOU NINCOMPOOP 

porco: NO WAY WTF DOES THAT MEAN😭😭

jean: idiot

porco: bro I just want to know, it’s not my fault i don’t know these academic vocabulary🥀

jean: …

pieck: no one tell him, this is funny 

yelena: indeed it is!

porco: why do you guys hate on me😕🔫

connie: 😧

sasha: 😧

mina: marco, want some blueberry muffins?? I can come over, and you and ymir can have some!! ٩(๑>◡<๑)۶

marco: omg yes pls😕 but after my date with jean!! (⁎˃ᴗ˂⁎) 

thomas: marco, which was the hxh manga you wanted??

marco: it’s the no. 22🙁

thomas: NO WAY!! I HAVE 2 OF THEM IDK HOW BUT I DO!! I can give it to you! You can keep it ofc🤞

marco: THOMAS OMG😭😭 THIS IS SUCH A COINCIDENCE OMG!! YESYES AT SCHOOL CAN YOU GIVE IT TO ME?? I’LL DEF BRING YOU A SNACK FOR THIS NO 3 SNACKS!! THOSE CHIPS YOU LIKE🥹🥹

thomas: AHH NO ITS OK!! ONE IS FINE

marco: NUH UH I HAVE DECIDED 

boris: this is … something 

Chapter Text

porco: finally done w the test🤧🤧

pieck: why did Mr. Berner looked so sad handing it out??! he was like “i wish you all the best” like he knew it’d hurt

colt: bro literally whispered “i’m sorry in advance”😭

marcel: he said “try your best” and smiled like he was sending us off to war💀

mina: wait so you all took a test today?

ymir: yeah Mr. Berner’s kids are FREE rn🫩

mikasa: meanwhile half of us are about to cry in Mr. Ackerman’s class 

eren: me. i haven’t slept since he said “study chapter 5 to 8”
eren: he meant the whole textbook…

jean: why’d he say “it’s not hard if you know the material” LIKE THAT HELPS😑

marco: he said “if you fail, you fail” 💔💔

marco: like pls have mercy :(

reiner: i’m sitting here w my notes open but all i see is numbers turning into hieroglyphics

porco: L

bertholdt: dw rei!! WE got this!!

reiner: i don’t got this Bertie…

ymir: bozo

historia: babe pass the answers😽😽

ymir: historia, my love, I was until Mr. Berner said, “if you’re thinking about taking pictures and sending them to Mr. Ackerman’s students, they are all different” 

historia: oh!

annie: test is in like 20 minutes

hitch: good luck babe😚 you know you can do it!

floch: MR BERNER DA GOAT FRFR💪💪

boris: u deserve Mr Ackerman for the way u talk in class

marlo: he’d throw the whole desk at u ngl

floch: ok marlo i didn’t ask😒
floch: but like hypothetically, what if u tutored me after school🤔

marlo: no.

floch: 😕🔫

sasha: LMAOOOOOO

hitch: instant rejection is wild😹

ymir: “no.” marlo you’re actually funny😭😭

historia: he didn’t even think abt it first 😭

mikasa: be grateful he didn’t report u

mina: no but like floch ur brave for trying 😭

thomas: “brave” is one word for it

marco: dw floch you can do better!!

eren: LMAOO MARCO😭

colt: ok so how was Mr. Ackerman’s test??

eren: SHUT YOUR BITCH ASS UP

porco: WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HIM??!

jean: i’m emotionally unstable rn

armin: dw renren you always say that and yet you always get perfect scores!!😽

mikasa: he made eye contact with me when i flipped the page like it was a crime

sasha: he took one look at my paper and sighed😿

reiner: he said “interesting approach” to me and i know that means it’s wrong

connie: he said “maybe numbers aren’t your thing”

bertholdt: sí tiene razón 

porco: obvio que tiene razón 

connie: ??

historia: it’s like I can still feel him watching…

marcel: meanwhile Mr. Berner gave us candy after the test…

colt: he said “thank you for your effort” and i almost cried

pieck: he graded one of my old assignments and wrote “well done, pieck 😊” like bro i’d die for u

yelena: Mr. Berner supremacy ✨

marlo: you guys don’t even get smiles smh

jean: he wrote “try again” on my paper once and i still think about it

marco: mr. ackerman fans are actually survivors

mikasa: Berner > levi. i said what i said

connie: aren't you guys related tho??🤔

sasha: nah levi makes u work tho. like his class builds character🤑 

bertholdt: character? he built my anxiety😸

reiner: i’d rather have Mr Berner’s emotional damage than Ackerman’s physical threat

colt: so it’s agreed then?? Berner over Ackerman?

jean: honestly.

eren: next time we should all switch teachers and see who survives longer

armin: babe we’ll all get detention…

floch: marlo should tutor me so i can switch too😛

marlo: still no.

annie: give it up

hitch: he’s delusional but we support the grind

sasha: “grind” is crazy when ur getting curved every time😭😭

ymir: rip floch’s confidence 2025–2025

historia: may it rest in pieces🦅

porco: never cared for it🙏

Chapter Text

connie: guys movie night👀

jean: better be a good movie unlike that Minecraft movie

marco: BABE?!

sasha: DONT DISRESPECT MINECRAFT MOVIE HORSE

jean: EXCUSE YOU?!!

eren: horseface

jean: LEAVE ME ALONE?!!

porco: lol horse face🤣🤣

pieck: porco you millennial, who still uses those emojis?

yelena: the elderly 

marcel: LMAOO

porco: marcel?? MY OWN BROTHER??! BETRAYING ME AGAIN😕🔫

colt: guys we’re going off topic…

bertholdt: wait what about FNAF 2?

armin: BERT YES 

bertholdt: :))

reiner: you are a genius honey🥹

bertholdt: <3

mikasa: why don’t we dress up as some of the animatronics?

annie: connie can be balloon boy

hitch: bc he is short?

connie: WHY AM I BEING ATTACKED?! Did we forget about porco of jean??😓

jean: get OUT

floch: marlo, can you be bonnie to my foxy?🤔

marlo: sure why not

connie: woah 

hitch: is this happening?

boris: floch not getting rejected??

annie: congrats 

floch: REALLY??!🥹

marlo: don’t make me take it back

pieck: porco, you better hurry

porco: CHILL

sasha: let’s try to sneak some food🤤

mikasa: i can bring one of my tote bag to put some food in

historia: wait but wouldn’t that be suspicious??

ymir: ofc not sweetie, we can just buy something cheap so they don’t get suspicious 

historia: i love your way of thinking😽

porco: gag

ymir: don’t you DARE start this grease boy 

marcel: wouldn’t be happening if you asked that one certain person out🫩

historia: YEAH YOU TELL HIM BABE and you too marcel ig

eren: porco can NOT even pull

porco: ???

armin: ren, it’s best to not start another argument

porco: yeah listen to your bf jeager like the good boy you are

ymir: I MEAN IG

sasha: HELLO??!

connie: PORCO THE FUCK?!!

jean: welp

armin: oh!!

reiner: screenshotting this 

pieck: send it to me Rachel😿

porco: WAIT NO THATS SUPPOSED TO BE AN INSULT

colt: porco??!

porco: COLT ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE I SWEAR

mikasa: good luck now

thomas: we just witnessed history🥹🙌

mina: I’m honored 

porco: THERE IS NO HISTORY 

marco: FNAF 2 it is!!

porco: DONT IGNORE ME

marcel: reiner send it to me too!!

bertholdt: hmm me too rei!! >:)

porco: ¿tú también bertl?😢

bertholdt: lo siento porco💔

porco: falling off a cliff 

hitch: L

colt: NOOO you’re too sexy for that HAHA

historia: well not exactly!

floch: gay

eren: like so gay

porco: DONT EVEN

pieck & colt

pieck: smooth but he is so oblivious 

colt: ugh i know😞

fruit basket

sasha: anyways!! What snack should we sneak??!

mina: I can bring brownies!!

marlo: chips!!

connie: burgers…

reiner: UGH YES PLS!! I’m craving for a burger 

armin: how about i make a list of what everyone or some will be bringing??

ymir: armin you’re too smart🥹🫰

sasha: this is so exciting!!

mikasa: guys I’ll bring some sugar cookies shaped as bats!!

pieck: woah you’re so cool 

yelena: indeed!!

connie: TOMORROW IS GONNA BE SO PEAK