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Getting into UA was everything Kouki had wanted since getting out of that musty basement eight years ago and seeing the sun for the first time in years. It was a harbinger of a change in his life. It was a gift from fate that he had not expected to receive. He knew fate had abandoned him in a hole with no exit, leaving no ladder to help him escape.
Not everything was perfect when he was taken in by his current guardian. People didn’t change overnight, even if war had sped up this process.
School was a new experience for him. Learning, making friends, and understanding social norms was like navigating a maze. It was hard. But he was used to it. He had a loving home, and that was enough.
Getting into the hero class was like climbing a mountain after a long, sweaty, and arduous hike. He didn't expect miracles, but he was excited nonetheless. Studying at the school where the greatest hero of their time had come from? Where Deku himself taught?
The sole thought made Kouki nervous.
Then came quirk training, and he wanted the ground to swallow him.
He had… troubles with his quirk. He could use it, of course, he had passed the entrance exam after all. He wanted to use it, and the thought excited him.
But something was holding him back. It was something he couldn't quite put his finger on. Was it all those gazes focused on him? Or the memory of his classmates, who always looked at him uncertainly when his quirk activated by accident? Or maybe it was the confused teachers who still didn't know how to handle it? Or the disgusted grimaces of his family members after his quirk appeared? Or the ones that showed on their faces every time they had to go down to the basement where he had been kept?
Kouki shook his head to clear his thoughts. It didn't matter. The point was that he wanted to learn how to use his quirk freely. He just didn't know how to overcome what was holding him back.
He had no problem using it during the exam. So why, when Deku-sensei asked them to demonstrate their quirks, did his darkness emerge from his hands in small black shreds only to disappear just as suddenly?
Kouki pursed his lips, feeling his cheeks turn red. This wasn't supposed to happen. He looked uncertainly at his classmates. Some looked interested; others looked confused. Deku-sensei frowned slightly. When he noticed Kouki looking his way, however, he immediately brightened up.
"It was a good demonstration, Terumoto-kun!" He said enthusiastically and wrote something down in his notebook.
"Woah, Terumoto! So cool! Your quirk is like physical darkness? You can manipulate it?" Izumi-kun jumped up to him, excitement etched on his face, his black eyes lightened with enthusiasm. Small water droplets fell from his hands onto Kouki's shirt. He demonstrated his quirk just before him.
"Um, yeah, something like that," Kouki said.
His classmates looked interested and curious, not confused or disgusted. Then why did they wear those expressions when he recalled them in his mind?
He pushed those thoughts aside for now. After all, this was just their first class. Nothing bad had happened yet. He’d do better next time.
Right?
As time passed, they had more classes with Deku-sensei and one day he asked Kouki to stay after class. Kouki knew he would ask him about his quirk. He just didn't know what to expect from the teacher.
Up until now, he had considered him to be the friendliest teacher he had ever had. That was why he was afraid of this meeting. He knew getting scolded by Deku-sensei would hurt much more than getting scolded by Aizawa-sensei. Aizawa-sensei was strict, and Kouki and his classmates expected him to show his displeasure. But Deku-sensei was nice. That’s why for some reason, instead of feeling calmer about the meeting, he was even more nervous.
As he approached Deku-sensei after class, he couldn't help but feel that his hands were shaking slightly. He hid them behind his back, hoping Sensei wouldn't notice.
Deku-sensei was still writing something in that notebook he practically never parted with. He and his classmates were always wondering what he wrote there. Izumi said that Deku-sensei just liked to take notes and that it was probably something about their quirks. It didn’t make Kouki feel better.
"Thank you for coming, Terumoto-kun," said Deku-sensei. He scribbled the last sentence down, then looked up at Kouki.
A surprised expression crossed his face for a moment before turning thoughtful. Kouki shifted from foot to foot, feeling Sensei's watchful gaze on him.
"Um," he said, trailing off, unsure of what to say next.
That seemed to snap Deku-sensei from his thoughts. His gaze softened a bit.
"You're not in any trouble, Terumoto-kun," he said in a calm tone. Was it really that obvious that he was nervous? If he wasn’t in any trouble, then what did Deku-sensei want from him?
"I've noticed that you have trouble with your quirk sometimes," Deku-sensei said.
So it really was about his quirk. Kouki stared at his red shoes, for some reason he didn’t want to meet Deku-sensei's eyes when he reprimanded him.
"I wanted to offer you some extra classes where we could work on your quirk together. I think it might help you get comfortable using it. What do you think?"
Kouki stiffened at first, then slowly raised his eyes to Deku-sensei. He smiled at Kouki warmly. Kouki didn’t know what to say.
"Is it really that obvious that I’m uncomfortable with using it?" Kouki asked quietly.
"I'm your teacher, and I'm supposed to notice these things,” Deku-sensei said as if it was obvious. "I don’t think your classmates noticed, but even if they did, there’s no reason to feel bad about it. That's why you're still learning. That’s why I’m here. To help you with the things that trouble you,” Deku-sensei said sincerely. Kouki felt like he was about to cry.
"I didn't know that was an option," Kouki said quietly.
He wasn't sure if he meant that he could receive help to better control his quirk or that the teacher could offer him help. Maybe it was both.
He had never experienced the latter in his life.
“So, what will you say? Do you want to work with me on your quirk?” Deku-sensei smiled kindly at him.
Kouki smiled back.
"Yes."