Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Dad!! Can we go to McDonald Pay-pace?”

“Tessa,” Mark sighed. “I already told you that’s where we’re going.” His daughter had been shouting this question at him for the last 10 minutes from her Hello Kitty booster seat in the back.

“But you said that two hours ago!” Said Millie, her sister from an equally pink Hello Kitty booster seat.

“Yeah!” Tessa agreed, kicking her seat enthusiastically.

They had in fact, not even been in the car 2 hours prior.

Mark came to a red light and put the silver Kia in park. He rested his forehead against the steering wheel, praying to it for more strength. “Sweethearts, we’re almost there.”

He felt his work phone buzz in his left pocket. The light ahead turned green. The call would have to wait.

As the McDonald’s came into view on the right, he flipped on his blinker.

“Wheeeeeeee!” Millie and Tessa squealed. “Pay-Pace! Pay-Pace!”

“Yep,” Mark said. “We’re going to the Playplace.”

After he pulled into an empty parking spot littered with ancient chewed gum stamped into the concrete, he got the girls out of their car seats.

“Alright, sweethearts. Remember to hold my hands until we get inside.” He held out his hands on either side of them, which Tessa and Millie grabbed eagerly.

While he was exhausted, he couldn’t help but smile looking at both of them. Part of it was because he loved them both, and part of it was excitement for a moment where their attention wasn’t solely focused on him. Even if it was just for a moment.

They walked inside and the girls bolted straight for the door to the PlayPlace.

“Girls, wait!” He said, walking after them. But their shoes were already coming off and the slide was calling.

A mom with a stroller in line briefly glared at him before turning back around to stand beside her husband, who was ordering.

He sighed again, and tried to shake off the feeling of being a parental mistake before walking after them.

He hadn’t even gotten a chance to change out of his work clothes. And his tie was strangling him. He slipped it off and draped it casually around his neck.

His girls were laughing and screaming at each other up in the tunnels of the PlayPlace, when his phone buzzed again.

“Shit.” He muttered under his breath. He fished his cell out of his pocket and picked up, running a hand through his hair. “Hello?”

“Hi, Mark, it’s Chris,” Came a voice from the other end. “I know you stayed late today, but you would be able to come in early tomorrow? Jules had something come up and she can’t run the meeting anymore.”

Millie screamed from the plastic tunnels. “Dad! Tessa’s pulling my hair again.”

“Um, yeah,” he managed, plugging his other ear instinctively to prevent more demands from entering his system. “Yeah I can make that work.”

“Thank you so much, Mark,” Chris said. “I don’t know how you do it.”

Me neither. He wanted to say. But he didn’t. So instead he said, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow,” Chris said, before hanging up.

As he hung up, Tessa and Millie came tumbling out of the slide, laughing and crying, respectively, before jumping onto and hugging each of his legs.

“Ok sweethearts,” he shoved his phone back into his pocket. “What’s wrong….”

Helly had been at the drivers seat of her Honda Civic for the past 7 hours, and desperately needed to pee.

“Are we there yet?” Her son Carson called out from the backseat. His iPad was blasting the Bluey theme song at full volume for the umpteenth time today.

“No, not yet,” she said, whipping the car into the parking lot without turning on her blinker. Someone honked at her for cutting them off in the lot, and she reflexively flipped the bird in the direction of the sound without even turning to look. She flew into a spot next to a Kia and threw the car into park.

“Where are we?” Her son asked.

“McDonald’s. Do you wanna eat here?”

“Yeah!” His eyes lit up. “Can I get a McFlurry?” He asked, daring himself to dream.

“If their ice cream machine’s not broken, then sure.” Helly said, unbuckling her seatbelt.

When they walked inside, a sight from inside in the playplace caught Helly’s eye. A man in a navy blue suit had two little girls hugging his legs. She wasn’t sure if it was the loose tie lounging around his neck, his messy dark hair, or the gentle way he seemed to speaking to his daughters despite being held hostage by them, but she smiled. It was funny. And he wasn’t half bad either.

“Mom, can I get in line?” Carson pointed at the menu above the cash registers.

“Let’s try the bathroom first.” She said, zeroing in on the restrooms in the back.

Carson darted into the men’s room. As badly as Helly needed to pee, she couldn’t resist stealing another glance at the man in the PlayPlace. So she looked over her shoulder.

That’s when he saw her. Through the glass separating the colorful plastic tubes from the rest of the restaurant, he realized she was looking at him. He was worried it was the rude mother from before, but this was someone else entirely. A slim woman with red hair was smiling at him. And she was stunningly beautiful. He looked down at his girls, realizing the sight he must be, before looking back up at her and smiling awkwardly.

She tried to flash him a smile that said Sorry, I’m not weird or anything, before darting into the women’s room, feeling like she just embarrassed herself without even saying a word. She tried not to think about the fact that he would probably still be there when she and Carson walked out to the register.

When she had thrown a paper towel away, she walked out and saw Carson waiting there for her.

“Ready for McFlurries mom?” He said, with his two front teeth prominently missing.

“Sure thing, Kiddo,” she said, walking with him to the register.

“Hi, welcome to McDonalds how can I take your order?” A worker said.

“Hi, yeah, could I get 3 M&M McFlurries? And two number four meals?” Helly asked.

“What size fry do you want with that?”

“Medium please.”

“Aight. Your total is $21.19.”

Helly tapped her credit card to the reader and took the receipt that was handed to her.

“Why’d you get three McFlurries mom?” Carson asked once they stood by the end counter. “It’s just us.”

It is just us, isn’t it Kiddo? She thought heavily to herself.

“Cause there’s someone here who looks like he could use one,” Helly said. “Would you like to climb on the playplace before we hit the road again?”

Carson’s eyes lit up and he smiled with a big front-toothless grin. “Yeah!” He said loudly.

When the food came out, Helly took it to a table. Carson scarfed down his McFlurry first until there was nothing left before sprinting into the PlayPlace. She put his meal in the bag for later before following him in.

She opened the glass door and heard the girls playing happily again on the slide, and Carson was hopping on one foot getting his last shoe off.

“Watch this mom!” He said before scrambling up to the very top.

“Great job, Kiddo,” Helly said enthusiastically. She gestured to a seat on the parents bench next to the man in the suit, McFlurries in hand.

“Is this seat taken?” She asked.

“Um, no! Have at it,” He spoke softly.

“I saw you earlier with your girls and thought you might like some ice cream,” Helly said, unsure of how to start the conversation.

“She said you looked like you need it!” Carson shouted from the top of the playplace.

Helly blushed.

“Oh, haha,” Mark chuckled, placing a hand on the back of his neck. “I’m sure I do. That’s really kind of you. Thanks.”

“Sorry about my kid, he’s as observant and vocal as they come.”

“My girls are the same way. I’m Mark.”

“Helly,” She offered him the ice cream in her left hand.

Without looking down, Mark accepted the treat and felt the absence of a ring on her finger when their hands brushed against each other.

She must have left her ring at home. He thought. There’s no way she’s single.

“Dad!! Look!” Tessa and Millie shouted over each other. They were jumping on the bottom of the slide.

“Yeah, I see you,” he said with the contrived enthusiasm of a well-meaning parent who answers this question frequently. “So, um, what part of Wisconsin are you from?”

“Oh,” Helly said. “I’m not actually from here. Just passing through on the way to my sister’s house.”

“Oh that’s cool,” Mark said. “I don’t meet too many out-of-towners. But then again, I’ve usually got my hands full so…”

“I totally get it.”

“Yeah?” He asked, sipping on the milkshake.

“Yeah. Carson’s dad and I split up when he was really little. I’m the one looking after him. So I get it.”

She really is single? Mark paused, unsure of how to respond. “That’s tough.”

Helly nodded, noticing his hesitation. “Yeah, but it’s better this way. Ever since his dad had his accident, things just didn’t work out.”

“Ouch. Hope he’s ok?”

“He tripped and fell into another woman’s vagina, so I think he’s alright.”

Mark covered his mouth as he nearly spat his McFlurry all over her with a fit of laughter. “Oh my god. What an asshole,” He said after recovering himself.

“Yeah, big time,” She agreed. “What about you? Got anyone helping you with the girls?”

Don’t look at her lips. He urged himself. “Not really,” He said, shifting his eyes away from her, and took a sip of his milkshake. “I work a lot, you know, so I’ve found a daycare that helps, but they’re so expensive.”

“Ugh. Tell me about it.” She said. Don’t look at his neck.

“Can I ask you something?” Mark leaned in a little bit, hoping that the kids wouldn’t hear. “How do you do it? The whole parenting thing. Because I don’t understand how anybody does this.”

“It’s fucking hard,” Helly said in a lower tone of voice. “Really fucking hard. If you’re doing it right. Which it sounds like you are.”

“Well, I just try to make it work. Ever since my wife died, I’ve decided that they deserve to be happy, more than anything.”

Helly looked at him with tenderness. He doesn’t sound very happy. She thought to herself. “You must really love your girls, Mark.”

He met her eyes. When Helly looked at him, it was like she had seen him on all those sleepless nights when the girls refused to sleep and he had nothing left to give them. When she looked at him, what he heard was, You are enough.

Helly noticed his dark brown eyes start to shimmer and she felt terrible. “Sorry, I —”

“No, it’s ok,” He said, rubbing his nose. “Really. I’m fine.”

How long has he been going at this alone? She wondered. While his navy suit fit him well, she worried that it was wearing him out faster than he could hang it up.

“I remember when Carson was three,” She began, with a comforting tone. “He was sweet and sour. And at any moment, he would flip between the two. There were days that I really couldn’t do it. Lots of days. So, I called my sister when I needed her. Middle of the night and everything. And she never complained. I’ve never heard her say anything negative about it to me once,” Helly said.

Oh my god, she’s just like me. “Wow,” Mark held his ice cream and listened intently to her story. “Your sister sounds awesome.”

“Yeah! She is. And like, she never made me feel bad for needing help. Which was huge for me. Carson’s still a kid, but now that he’s six, I feel like I really get to enjoy being with him more now than when he was a baby. Which feels wrong to say, because you’re supposed to love them as soon as they enter the world, but it’s true.”

“I completely understand,” Mark thought about how he visited Gemma’s grave after the twins came out of the NICU for the first time. They were screaming. He was crying. He felt like a terrible father for not being whole. “God, you don’t know how much I needed to talk to someone about all of this,” He said, mixing around the M&Ms in his ice cream with a straw.

“Anytime,” Helly said, mixing her ice cream around too. “Ooo wait you have to try it with the fries.”

“In the ice cream?” He furrowed his eyebrows.

“Oh yeah,” she said, pulling out the fries.

She put the fries in between them and demonstrated the art of the dip and sink. Mark followed suit.

“That’s really good,” he said. “Oh my god.”

“How have you never tried them before? Is that not a Wisconsin thing?”

“I don’t know about that. I think I’m just a picky eater.”

“But you like it?”

He looked at her and his heart started to race. "Yeah," A smile played with the corners of his lips. “Yeah, I do.”

They savored the moment together.

“So I gotta ask,” Helly said after swallowing another bite. “Where do you work?” She gestured with her free hand to his suit. “I don’t see many men at McDonald’s in a full suit that often. Not that I’m complaining.”

“I’m actually a software consultant,” He blushed. Thanking fate, he reached inside his sports coat for a business card. With his number on it. “Here’s my card.”

“Wow,” Helly said sarcastically. “Well if I ever need my software consulted, then I know who to call.”

“You can also call me if you have other things to talk over. If you’d like.”

His heart was pounding.

“Ok,” Helly said warmly. “Yeah, ok.”

The moment was sparkling with spontaneity and soaring with possibility.

“Well, the girls have to get to bed soon,” Mark said, with the classic Midwest Dad thigh slap that indicated the end of the conversation. He pulled off his tie from around his neck in one smooth motion and stuffed it in his pocket. Helly had to remind herself that they had just met.

“Yeah. Carson and I should hit the road. It’s gonna be a late night.”

“Oh, right,” He said, standing up. “Drive safe. It was really nice meeting you, and uh, thanks again for the ice cream.”

“Don’t mention it,” she smiled. “Carson,” she called over her shoulder.

“Comin’!” Carson called. “Lemme go down the slide one more time.”

“Hey I was here first!” Millie said.

“Yeah, we were here first!” Tessa agreed.

Mark and Helly eventually got their kids down from the PlayPlace, helped them tie their shoes, and walked out into the parking lot.

“Is this your Kia?” Helly pointed a thumb at the silver car next to hers.

“Yep. Sure is.” He said.

After they buckled all of their kids into their respective car seats, Mark climbed into the driver’s seat of his Kia and turned on the engine. He stole a look to his left to find Helly in her driver’s seat, looking at him. Behind their cars’ respective window panes, they smiled at each other.

And then she was gone.

God. He mused. She was wonderful. before backing his car out for the long drive home.

“Dad, can we go to McDonald Pay-Pace?” Tessa asked again, as soon as he left the parking lot.

“We just did that, Sweetheart,” He said, preparing to answer this same question the whole way home. But this time, he didn’t have to pray for patience. He’d been given a sweetness that reminded him to keep going, and that better days were on their way. And maybe better nights, if a certain red-haired woman ever found herself back in Wisconsin.