Archive of Our Own ^beta

They had been on their way to meet the others. An urgent emergency meeting between all the heroes and their beasts. Because that's what this situation was: urgent.

Golden Cheese had been close to panicking when she had woken up to her Soul Jam missing. It had taken them both quite a bit to calm her down, and ultimately it had been Smoked Cheese who succeeded in it.

The queen was still on edge, even now. 

Burning Spice didn't understand it fully. He could understand anger, or outrage over someone having the audacity to steal someone else's Soul Jam. It was something he could relate to.

But the panic, the fear the golden sovereign was displaying? That, he couldn't understand. But he also didn't need to. His girlfriend was devastated by the thievery, and that was all he needed to know to treat this with utmost seriousness. 

He’d been the one to lead the way. Walking a few paces in front of his two lovers, determined to get to the meeting as quickly as possible so they could resolve this entire thing promptly.

He hadn’t paid attention to their quiet muttering. Reassurances from Smoked Cheese, most likely. Too occupied with his own thoughts. With the vague, sleepy memories of an unusual visitor in the dead of night.

But he paid attention when it suddenly stopped. It was Smoked Cheese's quiet gasp that made him halt in his steps and turn around.

Both his lovers had stopped in their tracks as well. Golden Cheese’s brows were furrowed in concern, one hand on her advisor's shoulder as she leaned into his space to catch his gaze, a questioning “Treasure?” leaving her lips. Smoked Cheese, on the other hand, wasn't looking at her. Eyes fixed on his own hand, as if there was something only he could see. His expression was serious, as always, but Burning Spice could spy the hidden alarm behind those yellow irises.

He furrowed his brows slightly, taking a step closer. “Hey! What’s wrong?”, he asked, receiving a concerned head shake from Golden Cheese.

“I don't know”, she answered, eyes never straying from her treasure. “Something is off..”

And then Smoked Cheese started to glitch .

Burning Spice could see Golden Cheeses eyes grow wide in alarm, a glimmer of horrified realisation in them. A realization that he didn't share, but it wasn't like he had time to think about it anyways.

Smoked Cheese had raised his gaze to look at his queen, mouth opening to say something. But before either of the three could do as much as utter a single word, the glitching got violently worse. One alarmed outcry of “Treasure!” was all the queen and harbinger managed, before Smoked Cheese collapsed.

Golden Cheese managed to catch him just barely, lowering them both to the ground, wings fanned out and puffed up in alarm.  

Burning Spice was at their side in seconds, getting on his knees in front of them. Though, without knowing what was going on, there wasn’t much he could do to help. Was it poison? But he’d never seen any poison that had an effect like this! So maybe magic? An attack from an enemy? Maybe the thief had cast a spell… He didn’t know. And without answers to those questions, he could do nothing but watch his treasures face twist in pain, unnatural glitches and flickers tearing at Smoked Cheese's form, as if it was trying to become something else, or nothing at all. 

“Treasure! Smoked Cheese Cookie!! ” The queen's panicked callings were met with silence as her lover hissed in pain.

Helplessly, Burning Spices hands hovered in the air. Unsure of touching either of his lovers, for fear it could make things worse. Fear of what ‘worse’ could be. The feeling ensnared his raising heart like vines. Though his face kept his panic hidden as he raised his gaze to look at Golden Cheese, attracted by her calling turned to distressed mutterings, like a moth to a flame. 

The queen was clutching Smoked Cheese as if her grip alone could stop the flickering and keep his form intact. Her eyes were wide, brimming with tears yet unshed. She wasn’t looking at Burning Spice at all, to focused on the cookie in her arms. 

“No no no! This shouldn’t be happening! Why is it this bad already?! Things were fine last time!” 

She knew something he didn’t. Knew what was going on. There was no doubt in that.

Burning Spices hands finally found a place to settle, grabbing the queen by her shoulders so she would look at him. Though firm, his touch never strayed from being gentle.

“Golden Cheese, what’s going on? What is happening?” The harbingers voice was firm, urgent as he captured golden eyes with his own red ones. “Tell me, if you know! Maybe I can help!”  

Golden Cheese just shook her head, fear and panic clouding her gaze as she clutched Smoked Cheese even closer. “There is nothing we can do…not without my soul jam!”, her voice shook for a second, before it steadied itself. 

Burning Spice brows furrowed, creases decorating his forehead in confusion. What had her soul jam to do with Smoked Cheese condition? 

Seeing his confusion, the goddess of abundance breathed in shackily, her gaze lowering once more. Without her crown to hold them back, her bangs fell untamed in messy strands, like a curtain that hid her eyes in shadows as she spoke again.  “I can’t keep his body stable without it. It shouldn’t have turned this bad this quickly, but my connection to the Light of Abundance is slipping! I don’t know how long till-” , she stopped herself, not daring to utter the thing feared most, lips pressing into a line, helpless and angry as her shoulders shook.

Burning Spice had to turn her words over in his head for a moment, still confused. Till a connection of metaphorical dots was formed and it clicked. 

The Light of Abundance…One of it’s abilities was to create-!

“You used your soul jam to resurrect him before?!” He all but blurted. The queen just nodded in confirmation. 

What an insane thing to do! How much greed did one cookie need to possess to will a power like this to literally bring death to it’s knees, all to keep one cookie at their side?!

Had the situation been any other, he’d probably have laughed about the absurdity of it, and then some more over how fitting it was that greed incarnate would be able to achieve something so ludicrous! 

But with how serious things were, he wasn’t in a mood for laughter. If Smoked Cheeses life really dependent on the soul jam, it explained why Golden Cheese had reacted so strongly to it’s absence. But that would also mean-

No. No, he couldn’t accept that! He refused to! There had to be some way to stop this, Soul Jam or not! They both had wielded it before, surely they could come up with a solution. They had to!

He had finally found something truly good in his life. He wouldn’t allow some petty thief to take that from him!

“There has to be something we can do! There must be a way to stop, or at least stall this until we get your Soul Jam back!” 

But what? 

There had to be a solution to this…

So why did Burning Spice feel like his hands were tied?! 

He hadn't noticed that he had lowered his gaze, staring at his own hands as they had moved from Golden Cheeses shoulder to instead hold one of Smoked Cheeses hands. Not until he had to raise it again to look at the queen as she spoke again.

That he received a head shake from her again made him feel icy cold, and burning hot at the same time. 

“I can’t. Without my soul jam, he…they-!”, a hand coming up to rest on her cheek interrupted her despairing words. Both harbinger and goddess turned their eyes to Smoked Cheese in an instance. 

The tamer had a faint smile on his lips, though pain still unmistakably tore at his features between unstoppable glitches, and his eyes had opened barely to look at his girlfriend. 

“My queen, you worry too much…”, Smoked Cheese voice, usually confident and full of mirth, was but a whisper. It still held uncountable amounts of affection in it though, and continued to do so as his eyes almost lazily turned to his boyfriend.

“You too, Pepperseed…”, his hand, clasped in two much bigger ones, squeezed lightly back, as if Burning Spice was the one in need of comfort.

Another set of violent glitches made Smoked Cheese inhale sharply and grimace. Both Golden Cheese and Burning Spices eyes filled with fear and worry as they opened their lips to speak their concerns. But he stopped them, his smile pulling back together, even though it looked like it took considerable effort. “I’ll be fine. I had worse… All you two need to do, is get the soul jam back. Okay? Should be easy enough, with how stubborn you both are” Neither of them seemed to know if they should laugh, or cry at the teasing tone forced into their lover's voice.

“Please, Smoked Cheese, my treasure! Don't leave me!” the queen all but begged, her wings limp on the floor behind her as she lowered her head to rest her forehead against the headpiece of her oldest advisor. 

“Don’t be ridiculous…You’d be lost without me. I won’t-” 

Smoked Cheeses didn't get to finish his sentence. The false promise remained only half spoken, as from one moment to another, the glitches swallowed him howl and his body ceased to exist.

Not even crumbs remained.

There was silence for a moment. Stunned, horrified, breathless, as Golden Cheese just stared at the now empty space in front of her. 

Burning Spice stared, too. His mind in denial of what had just happened, for just a moment, despite having seen it with his own eyes. It had all suddenly happened so quickly…

And then the fallen queen doubled over and tore him from his horrifyingly blank thoughts. Her arms wrapped around herself now, no longer preoccupied with holding another body, and she screamed.  

Such a raw, emotional sound. Mixed with sobs, the pitter patter of tears and the shaking of shoulders.

It had Burning Spice flinch back for a moment, purely instinctively.

He had heard her scream before. Out of pain, and out of anger…was the cause of it, too. But he never heard her like this . A sorrow filled whaling that went through dough and jam. Pain that went so much deeper in magnitude than what was ever able to be inflicted physically.

He surged forward not a moment later, gathering the mourning queen in his arms. Golden Cheese latched onto him immediately. Fingers digging in his dough as she sobbed and whaled her pain and sorrows into his shoulder . 

And all he could do, was hold her. Unable to speak a word, or do anything else of purpose.

Screams soon turned to sobbed words, partly incoherent as the queen shook her head in despair.

“ No…please! They can’t-! I don't-!” 

Burning Spice looked down upon his remaining treasure nestled against him in worried concern. Trying his best to listen, while he managed to finally utter some comforting shushing, one hand helplessly rubbing the space between Golden Cheese's wings, in hopes of calming her.

“Smoked Cheese…My treasures -! I can’t-! I don’t want to be alone again! Please! ” 

‘ Treasures ’? Plural?

She had done this earlier as well, first referring to Smoked Cheese, and then to a ‘they’, when talking about the consequences her lost soul jam would bring…

It stood out to Burning Spice like a sore thumb. A tiny detail that might have flown under his radar any other time, but that his mind latched onto, now that he was trying to stay calm and concentrate.

Her mutterings, her unconsolable, heartwrenching whaling as if her entire world just had been torn into tiny crumbs… It was almost as if Smoked Cheese wasn't the only thing she lost. Especially considering that his death should be temporary, so long as they got her soul jam back… So why was she this devastated? Why did she keep calling out for not one ‘treasure’, but for ‘treasures’ instead? What could be-

“I call all my subjects ‘treasure’-”

“Queen of a fallen kingdom-”

Burning Spices breath caught in his throat. His head whipped around, staring into the direction of the kingdom he had learned to call ‘home’ in the passing months. The walls of the Cookie Kingdom, and the distance of land made it a futile action. He wouldn't be able to see the Golden City from here, despite the horrifying realisation that had hit him like a brick.

This couldn't be true…

He must have put the pieces together wrongly…

There was no way she had managed to pull something like that off…!

The entire kingdom?!

She’d lost everything, hadn’t she…?

That thief hadn’t only taken her soul jam. Hadn’t only caused the death of their lover. 

No, this was much worse.

And Burning Spice hated all of it.

Hated his own helplessness. Hated seeing his lovely goddess, turned fallen queen, devastated and shaking like a frightened Cheese Bird, clutching onto him for dear life. Because right now, he was all she had left. 

Instinctively he pulled the former queen closer, arms wrapping around her protectively as he rested his head upon her own.

His face was cast in shadows, expression unreadable, though his eyes glowed a furious red as he made an oath to himself.

He would make him pay for what he did!

---------------------------------------------

The meeting had gone as…well as one might have expected. Which was to say: arguably not well at all. No plans were made that day.

Golden Cheese had pulled herself together better than he had expected possible after her, very understandable, breakdown. A dignified deity through and through. But her composure was hanging by threads, Burning Spice was sure of that. So, he decided to stay close to her. Not hoovering, of course. Just close enough that he’d be in her reach, should she need him.

The other heroes hadn’t questioned it. Neither had they questioned why their trio had been reduced to a duo, so he assumed that they knew. The other beasts had looked at him with a raised eyebrow and questioning looks though, just as clueless as he had been previously. He hadn’t bothered to fill them in. It wasn’t his story to tell.

Turned out, as ‘luck’ would have it, White Lilly Cookie had arrived at the kingdoms gates just in time for the meeting. Bringing with her the bad news that her own soul jam had gone missing a few days ago, it being the reason for her sudden visit. And hers and Golden Cheeses weren’t the only ones who had been stolen. Both Hollyberry Cookie and Darc Cacao Cookie were missing theirs as well. And with Pure Vanilla suspiciously having left the kingdom last night, as well as Burning Spices memories of the intruder, it hadn’t been hard to surmise who must have taken them.

Needless to say, none of the heroes had been happy with the accusation. That it came from a beast probably didn’t help.

The heroes were blinded by rage and panic. Impatience seeping into their dough like poison, clouding their minds. Dark Cacao wanted to resort to violence right away. Golden Cheese was understandably driven by urgency. And while Burning Spice could sympathise with both sentiments, he was also thinking clearly enough to know that rushing the matter would yield no positive results.   

With emotions running this hot, it was no surprise that the blame was quickly turned and pointed towards the beasts instead. Any words of caution were dismissed, impulsivity, distrust and misplaced pride filled the air. 

Burning Spice wasn’t too surprised when White Lilly Cookie kicked the beasts out of the meeting. But he would be lying if he’d claim that it didn’t sting at least a little bit that Golden Cheese let it happen without any protest. 

She probably had her reasons. Maybe she just thought he wouldn’t be of help right now, maybe it was to keep the fragile piece between beasts and heroes, or maybe she was simply too occupied with wanting her soul jam back as quickly as possible. He didn’t truly blame her, whatever her reasoning may have been. But he couldn’t help that it felt a bit like a small betrayal nonetheless. 

At least it gave him and Mystic Flour the opportunity to deal with Shadow Milk's breakdown, before the jester could spiral into doing something stupid.

And when the meeting ended, Burning Spice escorted Golden Cheese back to the room they shared, where she had all but collapsed onto the bed. Neither of them spoke of what had occurred during the meeting. But she didn’t allow him to leave this time, and he probably wouldn't have left anyways, even if she had ordered him to. 

Despite how exhausted the fallen queen had been, it had taken hours till sleep had taken her. Hours in which Burning Spice had done his best to keep a cool head and comfort her. Hours in which Smoked Cheese's absence had been felt each second.

Burning Spice only allowed himself some space once his love had finally found rest. His fingers carefully carted through golden strands of hair, before whipping away a stray tear left on the slumbering hero's cheek, before he turned to leave. He quietly closed the door as he turned to stalk the hallways of the sleeping castle. 

He was tired. He couldn’t sleep.

His mind kept replaying what had happened that morning. The pictures of Smoked Cheese glitching out of existence right in front of him, while he could do nothing, were burned into his mind. The sound of Golden Cheeses screaming and crying, while he could only hold her, filled his ears. 

Pure Vanilla Cookie had brought suffering over Burning Spices treasures, and he had let it happen…

He didn’t know how far or how long he had been walking before his eyes caught on a mirror as he was passing by. A decorative thing, hanging innocently on one of the hallways walls. It made him stop in his mindless wanderings, gaze fixed on the reflection presented to him. The beast in the mirror blinked back, tears shimmering in the corner of his eyes like pearls in the pale moonlight falling in through the window. 

And while he stared at himself, Burning Spice couldn’t help but let out a short laugh.

Right. It had always been like this, hadn’t it? All he was ever able to do was watch . Watch as disasters struck, civilisations crumbled, lives ended…Why should now have been any different?! 

The mirror shattered under his fist, a frustrated scream leaving his lips. Sleeping cookies be damned. 

His breath came out in shallow huffs, anger burning his insides as he stared at his own reflection, it staring back at him in multitudes through the splintered glass. 

Why?! Why was it always the same?! Why was he still so stagnant?! 

He couldn’t help Smoked Cheese! He barely managed to be there for Golden Cheese! He didn’t even manage to get the heroes to listen !

The mirrors frame meet the floor, wood splintering together with what little glass had been left inside it. A vase, standing innocently a few steps away, soon meet the same fate.

He should have stopped Pure Vanilla last night, but he hadn’t . 

The splintering of wood once again filled the halfway as waste was laid upon the little table that had held the vase. A little, decorative chair followed suit.

He should have done something to help Smoked Cheese, instead he had hid behind his helplessness and had done nothing !

The metal rod holding the curtains of the nearby window groaned pathetically under the beast's strength, breaking as the curtains were roughly yanked from their place with a roar.

He should have stayed in that stupid meeting and made them listen to him, instead he let himself be thrown out and left !

Spiderweb like cracks decorated the windows glass as a piece of the curtains rod was thrown at it. It didn’t break, surprisingly, but the cracking still echoed through the night.

He should be able to properly console Golden Cheese, yet even in that he failed !

Burning Spices breath came out in ragged huffs and sobs as his fist connected with the wall, leaving an indent in it that someone would have to fix at a later point in time.

He should be at Golden Cheeses side, instead of letting his emotions out on innocent furniture of a place that granted them stay so gracefully… 

Stumbling back, the harbinger of chaos sank to his knees. There was no more shouting, no more anger, just the sound of rageth breaths and the sobbing of a beast in the dead of night.  

He didn’t know how long he sat there, surrounded by the destruction that he himself caused. When he finally was able to wipe the tears from his eyes he felt calmer, despite the sorrow still holding onto his heart.

But underneath it, there was a quiet flame still burning. Not anger, no. But resolve. He hadn’t been able to do anything this time…But the next time, he would…and he swore that, even if it would be the last thing he ever did, he would succeed!