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why would you do this.

Summary:

philemon hears of a new fool's journey and decides to... make a group chat? with the intent to help the new wildcard?? how... fun.

Notes:

this is my first ever work.
im not any good at dialogue n im really not all that funny so i hope anyone who reads this likes it.

Chapter 1: philemon makes a grave mistake

Chapter Text

philemon has created unnamed chat
philemon has changed the chat name to unpredictable people
philemon has changed philemon's name to blue butterfly
blue butterfly has added four users

blue butterfly: Hello to you four. I have added you all to this group chat to inform you of an upcoming fools journey.

narukami: who is this?
igor?

blue butterfly: Ah, no. I am the one they call philemon. I happen to be a dweller from the realm of consciousness and unconsciousness, a neutral being who can awaken personas in whomever he chooses.
I am also sometimes referred to as Igor's employer.

yuki: igor has a boss?
also. how do i currently have access to a phone considering i am. y'know. mostly dead.

narukami: what??
dead???

shiomi: yeah, same here.

narukami: WHAT????
who are you people 😭

aigis: Makoto-kun? Kotone-chan? How could this be possible?

Is the seal still intact due to.. whatever this is?

narukami: what seal???

blue butterfly: Do not worry, the seal is still intact. I have simply used a bit of my power to give Yuki and Shiomi the ability to communicate with the other wildcards, as well as their living friends if they so wish.

narukami: so im just getting ignored i guess???

aigis: That is truly a relief to hear, Philemon-san.

yuki: it really is, i would've hated if my death quite literally had been for nothing 💀

shiomi: mako… our deaths wouldn't have been for nothing, no matter how many years have passed, we still helped stop the literal end of the world.

aigis: I agree with kotone-chan, makoto-kun. While I, and the rest of our collective friends miss you and kotone-chan an insurmountable amount, both of your deaths were truly noble and the world has lived in relative peace for seven long years due to your sacrifices. Your death will never have been “for nothing”.

yuki: thank you aigis, truly. i would however, still prefer the seal to be okay

shiomi: ooohf; yeah same.. i'd prefer all my friends stay alive 🤞🤞

aigis: I agree with the both of you, but my point still stands. Your sacrifices would not have been for nothing, understand?

shiomi: yes, ai-chan.

yuki: yes, aigis.

narukami: what a wild ride. (haha get it, wild ride like a wild card. no? just me? okay.)
anyway, philemon-san, what was that you mentioned about a new fools journey before that whole conversation.

blue butterfly: Ah yes! Thank you for reminding me Narukami, as I was saying before, a new wildcard’s journey will soon come to fruition.
I have already informed Igor of this, and he has thus far prepared for the new guest of the velvet room.
Oh, speaking of, please do not inform Igor of this chat, I wasn't supposed to tell anyone of the new fools journey, however, there is an ominous feeling within myself that tells me something will go terribly wrong.
So in preparation for this feeling I have chosen to ask a favor of the previous wildcards in case my worries are in fact not unfounded.

yuki: ahhh thanks philemon-san, i hope your worries are wrong, if only to keep this new wildcard from gaining a shit ton of trauma

yuki changed yuki's name to mass destruction

mass destruction: anyway, @aigis.
i have a question for you.

aigis: yes?

mass destruction: could you tell the rest of S.E.E.S abt this whole thing so they don't think they're going insane when i message them 🙏

aigis: Of course. Would you also like me to inform them of your current situation Kotone-chan?

shiomi: yes!!!!

aigis: very well then, i will be back later.

shiomi: bye ai-chan!!!!!!

mass destruction: bye aigis 👋

shiomi: anyway!

shiomi has changed shiomi‘s name to space detective

space detective: what happened to the other guy?

mass destruction: idk, maybe he left?

narukami: im still here, js lurking
i keep getting ignored anyway