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Chapter Text

1 Week Until Christmas

Lincoln was at the Royal Woods Mall, which was decorated for Christmas, with his friends Clyde, Liam, Rusty, Zach, Stella, and Kara. The group of seven sat around a table in the food court looking exhausted, as they had just finished final exams the day before, while a brass band stood nearby, playing Deck the Halls. Rusty gulped down his drink, but then quickly spat it out, disgusted by the taste.

“Oh, eggnog,” He moaned, wiping his tongue.

“A piece of advice, Rusty,” Lincoln advised jokingly. “Have some egg-free eggnog like mine.”

Lincoln happily gulped his eggless eggnog drink, while his friends looked at him jealously.

“Honestly, Linc, I don’t know how you can drink that stuff,” Zach commented.

“Ah can,” Liam spoke up. “Mah family and ah do all kinds of disgusting things. For fun, of course.”

“Okay, you didn’t have to go into that much detail, Liam,” Kara said sarcastically.

“Guys, cut Lincoln some slack,” Clyde chided them. “Lincoln made a choice for Dawn; he’s not gonna eat anymore meat for her sake.”

“Yeah, and as long as it makes her happy, then Lincoln’s happy,” Stella added. “And that’s what I like about Lincoln, he’s always willing to put others first.”

“Like?” Kara asked teasingly. “As in, like him, like him?”

“No, of course not!” Stella immediately denied. “As in, like him as a friend!”

“Well, well, well,” A voice said condescendingly. “If it isn’t the nerd patrol from Royal Woods High.”

Lincoln knew whose voice that was. Walking over to the table was a boy with red hair and black eyes. He wore a dark green T-shirt with a green turtle on the chest and a white long-sleeved shirt underneath, grey jeans, and white shoes. This was Chandler McCann, Lincoln’s middle school rival.

Chandler slowly approached the friends, when he stopped at Lincoln’s chair, gripping the sides with his hands before leaning down to whisper something in his ear.

“Hey, Lincoln Lame, your hippie girlfriend from Canada isn’t here to protect you this time,” Chandler told Lincoln mockingly.

“Then it’s a good thing she isn’t,” Lincoln replied flatly, standing up and turning around so he could face his long-term archnemesis. “She would’ve sensed what your aura was in a second.”

“Oh, yeah?” Chandler challenged as he took his hands off Lincoln’s seat and put them on his hips. “And what might that be?”

“Simple. That you’re nothing but a petty bully who picks on others so you can feel good about yourself,” Lincoln explained, still not showing any emotion. “You know something, Chandler? Back in elementary school, at least you had something special. Then came middle school, and your popularity dropped like a rock. I mean, who would want to throw parties in a sewage plant? It’s a health hazard, regardless of how old they are. Even my sister Lana thinks they’re disgusting, and that’s saying a lot coming from me. And yet, in high school, you’re still trying to find ways to belittle me and my friends? It was annoying already when we were in middle school, but now, it’s starting to get old. What were you gonna do when you came up to us, spill my drink on me? Seriously, that’s the best joke in the book you can come up with now? Look around you, Chandler. We’ve all grown up and moved on. The only one who hasn’t is you.”

Chandler looked over Lincoln’s shoulder to see the latter’s friends glaring at him, or in Clyde’s case, frowning, as he was slower to anger than the rest of them. Chandler knew Lincoln was right; he had fallen far from the popular kid he was in elementary school, and despite being awarded for Most Detentions Ever in middle school, the rest of the students and Lincoln’s friends considered it to be a pretty low accomplishment. Instead of admitting it, Chandler gritted his teeth and growled in rage, but managed to hold it in and decided to fight back with words of his own.

“You know, ever since you set foot on that island last summer, you’ve been less fun to tease,” Chandler said weakly, as that was the best insult he could think of. “If you’re gonna spend all this time boring me, then you’re just wasting my time.”

Chandler then walked off as Lincoln sat back down at the table with his friends.

“Someone oughta teach that punk a lesson,” Zach growled, as he still wasn’t over the time Chandler made fun of his alien beliefs.

“Then get in line, ‘cause you’re after me,” Liam said, cracking his knuckles. “Ah mud wrestle with mah farm animals all the time.”

“Okay, guys, let’s not resort to violence here,” Stella scolded them. “Because I’m sure that’s the last thing Lincoln would want. Right, Lincoln?”

Stella turned to Lincoln’s seat and saw it empty.

“Lincoln?” She asked.

She, Kara, Clyde, Zach, Liam, and Rusty turned to see Lincoln walking over to the disposal bins and dump his empty drink into recycling, then he walked off.

“You know, I’m getting really worried about Lincoln,” Rusty confided his worry to the others. “He’s been hung up on Dawn and his friends from Canada since he got home. I mean, he still hangs with us on occasion, but still, it’s like his friends from Total Drama have replaced us as his number one priority.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Rusty,” Clyde dismissed. “Lincoln’s just going through a time where he’s trying to find time for all of us.” Then he started to worry too. “Then again, we only have 1 year, 5 months, 3 weeks, and 6 days until we graduate high school, and 1 year, 8 months, and 2 days until we leave for college. What if Lincoln ditches us and starts hanging out with his new friends? What if I go to college alone and end up falling in with the wrong crowd? What if I’m forced to drop out, and then Lincoln thinks I’m a sorry excuse for a best friend and doesn’t want to be my best friend anymore? Worse, what if he doesn’t want to be our friend anymore?”

Clyde then got out his hyperventilation bag and started breathing into it as Stella and Kara rubbed his back to calm him down.

When Lincoln got back to the Loud House, he saw his sisters doing their regular holiday traditions: Lana was outside helping Rita with the Christmas decorations; Lily was on the floor of the living room writing a letter to Santa Claus; Lucy was sitting on the couch reading Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol; Lynn Sr. was in the kitchen making his signature figgy pudding (which everyone secretly disliked); Lynn was upstairs practicing for a Christmas afternoon football game; Lola was in the bathroom preparing for a Christmas pageant; and Lisa was in her room doing some winter-related experiments.

“Looking great, guys!” Lincoln called to his mother and mechanic sister on the roof once he saw the lights and decorations surrounding the house.

“Thanks, honey!” Rita called back.

“Sorry, Lincoln, can’t talk right now!” Lana yelled to her brother as she got out her hammer and started hammering.

Lincoln then stepped inside and bent down towards his littlest sister. “How’s your Christmas letter coming along, Lily?” He asked.

“Almost done,” Lily replied, not taking her eyes off the piece of paper, as she was hyper-focused on writing down what she wanted that year. “Just a few more things, and then we can take this to the post office later.”

“Okay,” Lincoln nodded, before he stood up and approached his spooky sister. “So, Luce, which part are you on?”

“The part where the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come shows Scrooge the bad future that awaits him unless he changes his ways,” Lucy answered while keeping her eyes on her book. “It’s my favorite.”

Lincoln looked at the fourth wall, a little unnerved about how the bad future the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come shows Scrooge could possibly be any good, before turning back to Lucy. “Well, I’ll just leave you to your reading then,” He said.

Lucy didn’t say anything as Lincoln walked over to the stairs, but before he could go up them to his room, Lincoln could hear Lynn Sr. calling for him from the kitchen.

“Hey, Lincoln!” He said. “My first figgy pudding’s ready, and I need someone to taste test it!”

Lincoln gulped as he headed into the kitchen, then walked up to his father, who was setting the Christmas treats down on the counter, ranging from figgy pudding to cookies to gingerbread.

“Hey there, sport!” Lynn Sr. greeted, taking a piece of figgy pudding and giving it to his son. “Care to give the old figgy pudding a test drive before the big day?”

“Sure thing, Dad,” Lincoln accepted, taking it.

Lincoln took a bite of figgy pudding, gagging in his mouth a bit at the taste, but managed to keep it down. He mouthed “yuck” to the readers, before putting the rest of it in his pocket.

“Hey, bud,” Lynn Sr. said, getting Lincoln to turn back to him. “Feeling the Christmas spirit?”

“I sure am,” Lincoln smiled.

“Me too, bud,” Lynn Sr. sniffed, as he was starting to get emotional. “Me too.”

They then heard screaming outside, and then Lincoln saw Rita saw hanging from the window, tangled in Christmas lights.

“Your mom’s swinging from the lights again, isn’t she?” Lynn Sr. guessed, noticing his son’s expression.

“Yep,” Lincoln deadpanned.

“Don’t worry, Dad, I got her!” Lana called from outside as she started to untangle Rita.

Lincoln then started to climb the stairs up to the second floor, and as soon as he reached the top, he saw Lynn charging at him.

“Hey, Lincoln!” She called.

Lincoln dodged Lynn by stepping to the side, causing Lynn to fall to the floor on her face.

“Very good dodging!” Lynn groaned painfully. “You’re getting better.”

Lincoln then helped Lynn up and Lynn dusted herself off.

“Lynn, what are you doing?” Lincoln asked. “Let me guess, practicing your tackle for your afternoon football game?”

“Yup!” Lynn nodded. “Hey, can I try that tackle one more time? This time, no dodging.”

“No,” Lincoln shook his head. “No way, no how. Not in a million years.”

Lynn groaned in frustration and walked off. Just then, an explosion set off in Lisa and Lily’s room, making Lincoln jump. Lincoln turned to the source of the explosion and saw Lisa walk out, carrying a beaker.

“Lisa, what are you doing?” Lincoln asked.

“Trying to mix sodium polyacrylate with H2O,” Lisa explained. “It’s science, you wouldn’t understand.”

“Or in layman’s terms, creating fake snow,” Lincoln clarified to the readers, before turning back to Lisa. “Keep up the good work, little sis. You’re our only chance at a white Christmas.”

“Science will prevail,” Lisa nodded, heading back into her room.

No sooner than Lisa shut the door did the bathroom door open, and Lola stepped out, wearing a long sparkly red dress, a green sash resembling a Christmas wreath, a white headband with a halo decoration on top, and a pair of angel wings on the back.

“Linky, I need your opinion,” Lola told her big brother, walking up to Lincoln. “How do I look? Should I add more sparkle, or is there too much sparkle?”

Lincoln took a deep breath and thought for a moment before giving Lola his answer. “There can never be enough sparkle, Lola,” He told his pageant-winning sister. “It’s the holidays, and you gonna want to go all out if you want to win the Little Miss Preteen’s Christmas pageant this year, don’t you?”

“Why, of course, Linky!” Lola beamed. “I’ll get right to it!” As she walked back to the bathroom, Lola muttered to herself. “I knew there wasn’t enough sparkle.”

Lola shut the bathroom door as Lincoln walked into his room. He got his computer, sat at his desk, set down his computer, opened it up, turned it on, and turned on his webcam. In no time, Dawn’s face appeared on the screen.

“Hi, Linky!” Dawn greeted.

“Hi, babe,” Lincoln smiled.

“Brbrbrbrbrbr!” Edward, wearing a Santa hat, chattered while crawling around on Dawn’s desk.

“Hey, Edward, good to see you again,” Lincoln said, as it was Dawn’s turn to take care of Edward. “How are things with Dawn’s family?”

“Brbrbrbr!” Edward explained. “Brbrbr!”

“He says things in Canada are fine, thank you,” Dawn translated, before setting Edward down on the floor. “How about you? How are things at the Loud House?”

“Oh, you know, the usual,” Lincoln replied. “Lots of craziness going on as we prepare for the holidays.”

“Gosh, it seems like only yesterday when we first met on the island,” Dawn reminisced fondly.

“And if it wasn’t for Ronnie Anne, I wouldn’t have gotten together with you,” Lincoln chuckled. “So it was really a blessing in disguise.”

Dawn chuckled, before she took a deep breath and prepared to say what she wanted to say next. “So, um, Lincoln…” She began.

“Yeah?” Lincoln asked. “What is it, Dawn?”

“You know how Christmas is in one week, right?” Dawn asked.

“Yeah,” Lincoln nodded. “But what does that have to do with us?” Something suddenly clicked in Lincoln’s mind. “Wait a minute, are you saying-”

“Yes, Lincoln. I want you to come spend Christmas with me in Canada,” Dawn explained. “Your family invited me and my parents to spend the offseason and Thanksgiving with you. It’s only fair that I repay you in full.”

“And this was all your idea?” Lincoln asked.

“Oh, no, no, no, no,” Dawn shook her head. “I had some help from the others.”

“What others?” Lincoln questioned.

Dawn pressed some buttons on her computer, and their two-way video call became a full on group chat with the rest of their friends from Total Drama: their teammates from both seasons, Bridgette, DJ, and Harold; their teammates from the Killer Bass in Island, Courtney, Duncan, Eva, Katie, and Sadie; their teammates from the Screaming Gaffers in Action, Gwen, Jasmine, Leshawna, Mike, and Trent; and their alliance mates from the super-alliance, Izzy and Lindsay.

“Hi, Lincoln!” They all greeted their American friend. “Merry Christmas!”

Lincoln was surprised to see all his friends together on the same chat, but smiled. “Guys…” He breathed. “Did you come up with this surprise for me?”

“Yeah, man,” Harold replied. “We’ve decided that you’re gonna spend Christmas with all of us.”

“Wait, all of you?” Lincoln asked. “How are we gonna afford it?”

“You can thank Bridgette for that,” DJ said.

“She gave me a hundred thousand from her million dollar prize…” Duncan revealed, before he scowled. “…And I still haven’t forgiven Chris for taking my hundred grand from me when I won my season.”

“Moving on, Duncan,” Courtney chided her boyfriend. “Look, Lincoln, the point is, Bridgette gave each of us a thousand dollars before she put the rest of her grand prize in her savings account.”

“So that’s…” Harold trailed off, counting each and every one of the chat’s participants, before adding himself. “Sixteen thousand dollars combined.”

“You’re gonna be spending Christmas with us at the Grand Overlook Hotel in Toronto…” Katie began.

“…All the way through till New Year’s!” Sadie finished.

Katie and Sadie squealed at the prospect of spending Christmas and New Year’s in a luxurious hotel, causing the others to plug their ears.

“And your whole family is invited!” Beth chimed in. “We’ve already sent the tickets!”

“Ooh!” Lindsay squealed. “I can’t wait to see Lori and Bobby’s babies in person!”

Lincoln bit his lower lip. “Yeah, Lindsay, here’s the thing, Lori and Bobby are spending Christmas in Great Lakes City this year with Bobby’s family,” He told the dumb blonde. “So, sorry, but she’s not gonna be coming with us.”

“She’s not?” Lindsay asked. At Lincoln’s nod, she slouched down in her chair. “Oh, that’s a bummer.”

“But I still can’t wait to have fun with all you guys,” Lincoln reassured Lindsay, cheering her up. “I’ll go see if the mailman is here, and once I get my tickets, I’ll tell my family. I’ll see you all soon, and happy holidays!”

“Happy holidays!” Dawn and the rest of Lincoln’s friends wished, before they all signed off the chat.

Lincoln shut his computer off, closed it, put it away, and walked out of his room.

“Okay, Lily!” He called as he stepped out. “We’re going to the post office now, so you’d better have your letter ready!”

“Okay!” Lily called back.

Outside, Lincoln’s friends were hiding in the backyard of the Loud House. Zach was using a periscope he invented to spy on Lincoln’s video chat with his friends, although Lincoln failed to notice them while talking to his other friends. Once Lincoln left the room, Zach retracted his periscope and called out to the others.

“Okay, the coast is clear,” He said. “Lincoln didn’t see us.”

Rusty, Kara, Liam, Stella, and Clyde emerged from their hiding spots and walked up to Zach.

“Who was Lincoln talking to?” Rusty asked.

“What did they say?” Kara asked.

“One at a time, please,” Zach requested. “Lincoln was on his computer, talking to his friends from Total Drama, and they said something about coming to Canada to spend Christmas with them.”

It seemed Clyde’s worst fears were realized, and he was starting to have a panic attack, which Stella and Liam noticed.

“Clyde, are you okay?” Stella asked.

“No, Stella, I’m not okay,” Clyde said after he calmed down, but then started to panic again. “I’m losing my best friend! Lincoln and I have known each other since we were five years old! I even put up a sign over by our first meeting spot so we wouldn’t forget our fateful first encounter! But now it seems he wants to hang with his new Canadian friends more than us!”

“Well, whaddaya suggest we do about it?” Liam asked.

Clyde sighed as he calmed down. “For the first time, I’m not sure,” He answered. “Lincoln’s the Man with the Plan, I’m just the Guy Who Makes You Fly. I can be nowhere near as good as Lincoln.”

Liam, Rusty, Zach, Stella, and Kara looked at each other, thinking there must be something they could do.

Chapter Text

At the post office, Lincoln and Lily stepped inside and walked up to the front counter.

“Hi,” Lincoln said to the postal clerk.

“Hi,” The postal clerk greeted.

“We’re here to mail a letter,” Lincoln explained.

“A letter, eh?” The postal clerk asked.

“Yeah!” Lily beamed. “It’s to Santa Claus!”

She got her letter out and handed it to the postal clerk, who then took it over to the mail cart to be sorted with the other letters.

“There you go, you’re all set,” The postal clerk told Lily. “I’ll make sure Santa and Mrs. Claus get your letter by Christmas Eve.”

Hearing that made Lily grin from ear to ear. “Great!” She said. “Thanks!”

At that moment, the mail carrier came inside, shivering due to the cold.

“Oh, it’s nippy out there!” He moaned aloud, then noticed Lincoln and Lily. “Oh, Lincoln, Lily! What a nice surprise. I stopped by your house last, but nobody was there to answer the door.”

“My family must be so engrossed in their holiday traditions like always,” Lincoln mumbled.

“Excuse me?” The mail carrier asked.

“Oh, nothing,” Lincoln shook his head. “Anything special you dropped by my house today?”

“How should I know?” The mail carrier shrugged. “Head back over there and check for yourself.”

“Okay,” Lincoln nodded. “Come on, let’s go, Lily.”

Lily eagerly took her brother’s hand as they walked out of the post office.

Back at the Loud House, Lincoln and Lily stepped out of Vanzilla 2.0. Lily went inside while Lincoln walked over to the mailbox and took out the mail, then began to skim through it until he found to a package addressed to him. Thinking it had to have been the tickets his friends paid for, Lincoln took the package inside and up to his room and then opened it, finding 13 tickets inside, one for each family member.

“Yes!” Lincoln cheered inwardly. “13 tickets to Toronto, and they’re open-ended. So we can stay in Canada through New Year’s and that gives me plenty of time with Dawn.”

He then began to think about when he was going to tell his family. “Should I tell them tonight?” He asked himself. “Well, maybe I should. It’s like they say, no time like the present.”

Lincoln put the tickets back into the package, which he sealed up with tape, and set them aside, then sat on his bed reading comic books until his dad called him and his sisters for dinner.

In the dining room, the Louds were having spaghetti and meatballs for dinner, while Lincoln just had a plate of spaghetti with sauce. Lincoln was awfully quiet as he ate, as he was still trying to come up with the perfect way to tell his family about his Christmas invitation from his Canadian friends. He was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard Rita calling his name.

“Lincoln!” Rita’s voice yelled.

Lincoln shook out of his trance and looked at his mother. “Yeah, Mom?” He asked.

“You’ve been awfully quite all dinner,” Rita said. “Is everything okay?”

Lincoln gulped, unsure if now was the right time to say it. But seeing his family’s pleading and concerned expressions, he took a deep breath and gave in.

“Yeah, Mom,” I’m fine, Lincoln assured, trying to remain composed. “It’s just…”

“Just what?” Lola asked. “Just what?!”

“Lola, stop pressuring your brother,” Lynn Sr. lightly chided.

“Yes, Dad,” Lola obeyed.

“We’re gonna spend Christmas in Canada this year!” Lincoln blurted out.

Lynn, Lucy, Lana, Lola, Lisa, Lily, Lynn Sr., and Rita stared at their brother and son as they tried to process his announcement.

“Say that again, son,” Lynn Sr. said calmly.

“My friends from Total Drama,” Lincoln began. “They pooled all their money, well from Bridgette’s prize money actually, to let us spend two weeks at the Grand Overlook Hotel in Toronto with them. And we’re gonna stay there through New Year’s.”

All the Louds were silent, which was a rare occurrence in the Loud House. Finally, Lynn, Lucy, Lana, Lola, and Lily squealed in delight.

“Normally, I don’t care for inane human emotions, but…” Lisa began, before she squealed as well.

“Wait, you’re all excited for this?” Lincoln asked, surprised that his sisters were so supportive of this.

“Of course we are,” Lana smiled.

“It’ll be great to see everyone again,” Lily grinned. “Especially Dawn.”

“And who little few actually gets the chance to experience Christmas in a luxurious hotel?” Lola beamed.

“Uh, Kevin McAllister, Home Alone 2: Lost in New York?” Lynn joked.

Lincoln smiled at his sisters’ support, then turned to his parents. “Well, Mom and Dad, what do you guys think?” He asked.

“I think it’s very nice of your friends to pool Bridgette’s money and put together this surprise for us,” Rita smiled.

“Yeah!” Lynn Sr. agreed with his wife. “It’ll be great experiencing Christmas in Canada. Speaking of which, can we see those tickets?”

“Of course!” Lincoln said, standing up.

He dashed upstairs to his room, and then dashed back down with the package that had the tickets in it. Lincoln then took the tickets out of the package and handed them out to his parents and sisters, leaving the remaining tickets meant for him and his four other sisters who lived away from home inside. Lynn, Lucy, Lana, Lola, Lisa, Lily, Lynn Sr., and Rita looked at their tickets very carefully.

“Let’s see…” Rita said as she examined her ticket. “It says that our plane for Toronto leaves at 10:00 a.m. on Monday.”

Once again, the Loud Family went silent as they tried to process that information.

“D-did you say Monday, Rita?” Lynn Sr. asked as he looked at his ticket again.

“Yes, that’s what I said,” Rita nodded.

Suddenly, Lynn realized something. “Guys!” She said. “Monday’s two days away, and we haven’t even packed yet!”

“Oh, right!” Lana realized. “Guess we’ve been so busy with all the Christmas decorations these past couple weeks that this kind of came up last minute.”

“Yeah, sorry, guys,” Lincoln sheepishly apologized. “That one’s on me.”

“Well, what are we waiting for?” Lana asked. “Let’s clean up and get packing!”

The Loud Family were quick to clean up their dinner dishes and put them into the sink, and while Rita and Lynn Sr. washed them, the kids immediately went upstairs to their rooms to begin packing for their trip.

That night, at the McBride house, Clyde laid in bed in his pajamas, too worried to fall asleep, still thinking about Lincoln. His glasses rested on his nightstand, as he took them off before getting in bed. When he heard his door knocking, Clyde pulled the cover over his head and pretended to be asleep, just as his adoptive fathers, Harold and Howard McBride, came into his room.

“Clyde?” Howard asked, cautiously approaching the bed. “Sweetie, are you okay?”

Clyde said nothing and turned on his side, which worried Howard immensely.

“I don’t know what else to do, Harold!” Howard panicked. “Clyde’s been moping since he got home, and we can’t call Dr. Lopez because she’s on her Christmas vacation in with her family!”

“Howie, go and get ready for bed,” Harold told his husband. “I’ll try to talk to him.”

“Okay,” Howard obliged, standing up and walking to his and Harold’s room, while Harold sat down on the side of the bed.

“Oh, honey, I know you’re upset about Lincoln and all,” Harold said softly. “But you need to understand that it’s normal to have friends except you and the others, even if they’re from another country. Promise me you’ll think about it, okay?”

Harold then stood up and walked over to the light switch, before shutting it off.

“Good night,” He whispered as he left the room.

Harold then left, shutting the door behind him. Clyde closed his eyes and fell asleep, Harold’s words resonating with him. However, what he dreamed of next would prevent him from fully heeding them.

Clyde’s Nightmare

Clyde woke up and looked down to see Lincoln celebrating his high school graduation with his Total Drama friends, talking about their plans to keep in touch with each other as they attended college.

“Lincoln?” He asked. “Lincoln! I’m up here!”

But Lincoln didn’t hear Clyde.

“Lincoln?!” Clyde called worriedly. “Lincoln! Please answer me!”

Clyde tried to get down to talk to Lincoln, but realized he couldn’t move. He looked up to see that he was glued to a maple tree in maple syrup, then looked to see Liam, Rusty, and Zach on his left, and Stella and Kara on his right.

“Guys!” Clyde exclaimed. “What are you doing here?”

“Lincoln did this to us!” Rusty accused.

“Lincoln?” Clyde asked in disbelief. He knew his best friend. There was no way Lincoln would do something as cruel as this. “No. No, no, no, that’s impossible!”

“Oh, but it is!” Zach argued.

“Once we graduated from high school, Lincoln officially ditched us!” Liam explained.

“And then he started hanging out with his new, weird friends!” Kara added angrily with a hint of sadness in her voice.

“He says we’re just dead weight now, and he doesn’t want to be our friend anymore,” Stella sniffed, heartbroken.

“And that’s how we all ended up here,” Rusty finished.

Suddenly, Rusty, Liam, Zach, Stella, and Kara disappeared around Clyde, leaving him alone.

“Guys?” Clyde asked fearfully. “Guys?!”

Clyde then saw a giant, demonic head resembling Lincoln’s looming above him.

“Lincoln?!” He exclaimed.

“Sorry, Clyde,” Lincoln apologized sarcastically in a booming voice. “But I had to leave my old life in Royal Woods behind. I’m famous now. I don’t have time to waste with lowlifes like you.”

“No, please!” Clyde begged. “Lincoln, don’t do this!”

Lincoln then opened his mouth, and the last thing Clyde saw before everything went black was Lincoln’s pink tongue, which licked him off of the tree.

Reality

Clyde shot up in his bed, screaming his lungs out, He covered his mouth and looked around, and was glad that his yelling didn’t wake up his dads or the neighborhood. He then put his face in his hands and cried, not ready to lose the person who he called his best friend for 10 years. After calming himself down, Clyde thought of a plan and went back to sleep, deciding to enact it first thing tomorrow.

6 Days Until Christmas

The next morning, Clyde got up early and ate a hasty breakfast, then left a note for his dads saying that he was out sledding with his friends (since Harold and Howard rarely let Clyde use his phone except to call home or 911) before racing out of his house. Once he was a safe distance from his house, Clyde got out his phone and texted his friends, telling them to meet him at Tall Timbers Park to go sledding.

When Clyde got to Tall Timbers Park, he climbed up to the top of the hill, where he saw Liam, Rusty, Zach, Stella, and Kara, who each had a sled. However, they were confused to see Clyde without his sled.

“Uh, Clyde?” Stella asked. “Where’s your sled?”

“My sled?” Clyde questioned.

“Yeah! Yer text said we were supposed to go sledding!” Liam reminded him.

“Okay, guys, the sledding was just a cover,” Clyde explained. “I called you all here because we need to talk about Lincoln.”

“Ugh, that again?” Kara groaned. “Clyde, how many times do we have to tell you? Lincoln’s gonna be fine.”

“No, Lincoln’s not gonna be fine!” Clyde argued. “Last night, I had a nightmare where Lincoln ditched us in favor of his Total Drama friends, and then he ate us!”

Stella and the boys were shocked by Clyde’s story of the horrible dream he had, while Kara was still skeptical.

“Okay, it’s official,” Kara said. “Clyde has officially lost it.”

“Actually, Kara, I think Clyde might be onto something here,” Zach admitted, much to Clyde and the others’ surprise. “I’ve seen these movies where the protagonist abandons his old friends to hang out with his new friends. What if Lincoln’s losing us?”

“Well, if so, then we gotta go to Canada and save him,” Rusty decided. “We need to show Lincoln that we’re still important in his life!”

“That’s the spirit, Rusty!” Clyde complimented. “Now, who’s with me?”

“We are!” Liam, Rusty, and Zach cheered.

Clyde then turned to Stella and Kara. “What do you say, girls?” He asked. “You gonna help us?”

Stella and Kara looked at each other and thought it over for a bit. Finally, they sighed as they looked back at the McBride boy.

“Okay, Clyde, we’ll do it, for you and for Lincoln,” Stella told him.

“But if this whole plan ends up going south, don’t say we didn’t warn you,” Kara gave Clyde a firm warning.

“Thanks, guys,” Clyde said gratefully. “Now the question is, how are we gonna get to Canada?”

“I can help with that,” Chandler’s voice piped up.

The rest of Lincoln’s friends groaned as they turned and saw Chandler approaching them, but Clyde got on his knees and groveled in front of him.

“Oh, please!” He begged. “I’ll do anything! Anything not to lose my best friend! Did you hear me? Anything!”

“Anything?” Chandler asked.

“Yes, anything!” Clyde confirmed.

Chandler thought about it for a while, then looked down at the desperate Clyde. “Okay, I’ll do it for a thousand,” He told Clyde.

“A thousand?!” Clyde spluttered.

“Yep,” Chandler nodded. “A thousand from each of you.”

“From each of us?!” Stella, Rusty, Liam, Zach, and Kara asked in shock.

“That is, unless you wanna take that ferry to Mapleton and then walk the rest of the way,” Chandler shrugged as he began to walk off.

“All right, all right!” Clyde gave in, making Chandler turn back to him. “We’ll pay it! Every last penny! Do we have a deal?”

Clyde stood up and offered a hand out to Chandler, who smirked as he shook it. “Deal,” He said. “Come on, I’ll show you my place.”

Chandler walked off giddily, while Clyde’s friends stared at him in disbelief.

“Are you serious, Clyde?!” Stella shrieked.

“You’re seriously gonna trust a jerk like Chandler?!” Kara exclaimed.

“After everything he’s done to us?!” Rusty finished.

“Like the time we let him join our Action News Team for new equipment, only to screw us over?!” Liam recalled.

“Or that one Halloween where he wouldn’t stop picking on us, even after we saved him from those aliens?!" Zach reminded him.

“I know, guys, I know!” Clyde shouted in guilt. “But it’s the only way we can get to Lincoln! Now, let’s go home and collect our $1,000. We’ll meet back at Chandler’s house in an hour.”

“Okay,” His friends said as they picked up their sleds and walked down the hill, although they were still wary of Chandler’s intentions.

After collecting their sum of the cash, Clyde, Liam, Rusty, Zach, Stella, and Kara met up at Chandler’s house. Clyde knocked on the door, and then Chandler opened it up.

“Ah, the nerd patrol,” Chandler said condescendingly. “It’s about time you showed up. I assume you have my money?”

Clyde walked up to Chandler first and handed him his sum of the cash.

“One grand, as promised,” He said, before taking his ticket.

The rest of Clyde’s friends followed suit, giving Chandler their thousand dollars in exchange for a ticket.

“Chandler, are you sure these are not counterfeits?” Kara asked as she and Stella looked at her tickets.

“They are 100% real,” Chandler confirmed.

“Seriously?” Stella asked, not believing Chandler was telling the truth for once.

“Yeah,” Chandler nodded.

“Wait a minute,” Rusty suddenly said. “There are only six tickets. Where’s the seventh?”

“I have it, dummy!” Chandler said, holding up the ticket Lincoln got from his friends that was meant for Lori. “I’ll pass myself off as Lincoln Lame’s oldest sister!” He then added under his breath. “Somehow.”

“How did you get that anyway?” Zach asked curiously.

“Oh, I may have been snooping around Lincoln’s house and snagged the ticket for myself,” Chandler explained. “He must’ve dropped it.”

“You didn’t steal it, did you?” Liam asked accusingly.

“Look, the important thing is that we all got our tickets!” Chandler snapped. “And you should be grateful that I gave you real ones this time!”

“Come on, guys, let’s go,” Clyde told the others. “We’ve done our part.”

He then walked off, followed by the others, while Chandler shut the door, masking a smirk under his face, happy that his plan was working.

Chapter Text

5 Days Until Christmas

It was 7:00 a.m. on Monday morning, and the Louds were fully packed for their trip to Canada. Vanzilla 2.0 was at the McBrides’ house, as Luna was going to take them to the airport in her tour bus, and the McBrides promised that they would take good care of their van. While most of the Louds were able to wake up at 6:00 a.m., Lola was still a bit cranky from lack of sleep.

Currently, the Louds were standing or sitting around in the living room, waiting for Luna to pick them up.

“Okay, fam, are we all packed?” Lynn Sr. asked his family. “I’m only asking this once because we’re not coming back for anything once Luna gets here.”

“Yes, Dad,” All the Loud children who still lived at home answered in unison.

“We got our tickets?” Lynn Sr. asked.

“I’ve got ‘em, hon,” Rita replied, holding up the tickets in her hand, before putting them away.

“Did you pack extra underwear, Lincoln?” Lynn Sr. asked his son. “Remember, we’re gonna be at that hotel for two weeks.”

“Of course, Dad,” Lincoln answered.

“And did we all use the bathroom?” Lynn Sr. asked. “The restrooms at the airport are filthy. Not to mention the bathrooms on the plane.”

“Yes, Dad,” Lana grunted. “Even me.”

“We’re not babies anymore,” Lola reminded him.

“I know, I know,” Lynn Sr. sighed. “It’s just, this is a once in a lifetime experience for us, not like at that hotel that we got kicked out from because-”

He was interrupted when he heard the honking of a familiar tour bus horn outside.

“Luna’s here!” Rita and the kids cheered, before running outside.

“Hey, wait for me!” Lynn Sr. called, following them.

Out on the front lawn, the Louds watched Luna’s tour bus pull up, then it stopped and Luna and Sam stepped out.

“Dudes!” Luna called out as she ran up to her family, who gave her a group hug, during which Lynn Sr. finally joined his family. “It’s good to see you again!”

“Luna, you’re here!” Lynn Sr. practically sobbed at seeing one of his older daughters again as he joined in the hug. “I’m so happy!”

“And that’s not all,” Luna said as she separated from the hug. “I also picked up Luan, Benny, and Leni!”

At that moment, Luan, Benny, and Leni stepped off the bus, and then Leni and Luan joined the rest of their family in another group hug.

“Hey, guys!” Leni said. “It’s so great to see you!”

“Talk about a family Christmas reunion!” Luan cried happily. “Two weeks at a hotel in Canada with all of Lincoln’s Total Drama friends!”

“And I’m glad that I get to be a part of it,” Benny smiled as he and Sam watched the heartwarming reunion.

“Me too, Benny,” Sam agreed with a smile. “Me too.”

After separating, the Louds noticed that someone was missing.

“Hey, Leni, where’s Gavin?” Lincoln asked, seeing Leni’s boyfriend wasn’t here.

“Oh, we’re on a break, you know, to sort our relationship out,” Leni explained. “He’s spending Christmas with his family this year.”

“What does ‘on a break’ mean?” Lily asked curiously.

Those who were in a relationship or had a relationship looked at each other, unsure of how to explain that to her.

“You’ll… find out when you’re older, sweetie,” Rita told her youngest daughter.

Lily could only nod obediently.

“Say, shouldn’t we get this show on the road?” Luan asked. “Our flight leaves in a couple of hours, right?”

“Yeah!” Leni agreed. “We’d better get going so we don’t miss it!”

“Here, let me and Benny help load your goods into the bus,” Sam offered, walking up and taking a couple of the Louds’ suitcases.

“Goods?” Leni asked in confusion.

“She means bags, Leni,” Benny clarified, before taking hers. “Here, let me help you with that.”

After all the Louds’ luggage was loaded into Luna’s tour bus, they piled in, sat down, and raced off to the airport.

Meanwhile, at the McBride House, Harold, Howard, and Clyde were in the living room, sitting on the couch while watching It’s a Wonderful Life. They were at the part where protagonist George Bailey was taken by his guardian angel Clarence to an alternate timeline where he was never born, and Howard cried at every emotional scene, much to Harold and Clyde’s annoyance.

When they got to the part where George was begging to have his old life back, Clyde received a notification on his phone, making Harold pause the movie.

“Dads, my friends are here,” He told Harold and Howard.

He stood up and waked over to the coat rack and put his winter jacket on.

“Wait, wait, wait!” Howard called. “Clyde, where are you going?”

“To hang out with my friends,” Clyde answered. “It’s really important. And we’re taking the Louds’ van with us.”

Before Howard could get another word in, Clyde zipped up his jacket and bolted out the door.

“Howie, let him go,” Harold told his husband. “With Lincoln and his family gallivanting off to spend Christmas in Canada, time with friends is just what Clyde needs right now.”

Howard relented as Harold picked up the remote and resumed the movie.

Outside, Clyde met up with Liam, Zach, Rusty, Chandler, Stella, and Kara in the driveway.

“So, did you tell your dads what I asked you to tell them?” Chandler asked. “That we’re taking the Louds’ van to the airport?”

“Yes, I did,” Clyde nodded. “And they brought it hook, line, and sinker.”

“Great,” Chandler grinned. “Then let’s go.”

“Aren’t you gonna drive?” Zach asked him.

Chandler sighed. “No,” He shook his head. “I’m still on probation by the DMV.” He then turned to Liam. “Hey, farm boy, why don’t you drive?”

“What, me?” Liam asked. “But ah haven’t driven a real car before!”

“Come on, Liam, it’s just like driving a tractor at the farm!” Rusty encouraged his friend. “Besides, you’ve got the most driving experience out of all of us.”

“Rusty’s right, Liam!” Clyde further encouraged their friend. “Come on, do it for Lincoln!”

“Liam! Liam! Liam! Liam!” Clyde, Rusty, and Zach chanted.

Seeing how much his friends were putting their trust in him, Liam took a deep breath and said. “All right, hop in, y’all! We’ve got a friend to save!”

The seven piled into Vanzilla 2.0, and then Liam took the wheel and drove off, as he was in the driver’s seat. However, he pulled out of the driveway the wrong way.

“Uh, Liam?” Kara asked. “The airport’s that way.”

“Oh, right,” Liam blushed, embarrassed. “Sorry.”

Liam did a U-turn and headed straight for the highway.

By the time they got to the airport, the Louds, Sam, and Benny were already going through security. Liam found a spot to park the van, and they immediately stepped out and ran inside.

“Oh, no!” Clyde cried. “They’re already on their way to the gate!”

“If you hadn’t drove that van like a tractor, we would’ve gotten here sooner!” Chandler snapped at Liam.

“Well, excuse me, dark prince!” Liam retorted. “Driving a tractor is much different from driving a van!”

“Excuse me, boys and girls?” The parking attendant asked. “You can’t park your van there.”

“Why not?” Stella asked.

“Because you parked it in a loading area,” The parking attendant told them.

“Bullshit!” Chandler yelled. “The family ahead of us got to park a whole tour bus full of people here!”

“That’s because they had VIP airplane tickets, very exclusive,” The parking attendant argued. “Now, go and move your van before I call the cops.”

Clyde, Liam, Stella, Rusty, Zach, and Kara turned around and got back in the van, while Chandler glared at the parking attendant, but ultimately relented and joined them.

“Tch, great,” Chandler grumbled. “Leave it up to Lincoln Lame to always get special privileges.”

(Time card: Two Hours Later)

After finding a parking spot in the parking garage, Chandler and Lincoln’s friends ran to the gate.

“Okay, I think we’re ready to close,” The gate agent said.

The flight crew closed the door and the gate, just as the seven came running up.

“Gee, tough break, kids,” The gate agent told them snidely. “The plane just left 10 minutes ago. You’ll have to wait for the next one.”

“What?!” Chandler, Stella, Liam, Zach, Kara, and Rusty exclaimed in unison.

“No!” Clyde cried.

He then ran to the window and saw the Louds’ plane taking off.

“Don’t worry, buddy,” Clyde said to himself. “We’ll find a way to get to Canada and save you from those reality TV wannabees.”

On the flight, Lincoln sat in his seat, watching James Cameron’s Aliens on his iPad; specifically, the part where Ripley confronted the Xenomorph Queen in an exosuit.

“Get away from her, you bitch!” Ripley warned as the Queen snarled at her.

In the row behind Lincoln, Luna put her earbuds in and started listening to Charli XCX’s “Boom Clap” on her iPod.

Boom! Boom! Boom! Clap!

Luna started drumming her fingers in her lap as she listened to her music, while Sam, who was sitting next to her, watched in amusement.

You’re picture perfect blue

Sunbathing on the moon

Stars shining as your bones illuminate

In the row behind them, Lily excitedly looked out the window, eager to see what awaited them when they got to Canada.

First kiss just like a drug

Under your influence

You take me over, you’re the magic in my veins

This must be love

An hour and a half later, the Louds’ plane finally landed at the Toronto airport. After arriving at their gate, they stepped out and walked into the terminal.

Boom! Clap!

The sound of my heart

The beat goes on and on and on and on and

Boom! Clap!

You make me feel good

Come on to me, come on to me now

Boom! Clap!

The sound of my heart

The beat goes on and on and on and on and

Boom! Clap!

You make me feel good

Come on to me, come on to me now

When they got inside, they looked around for Lincoln’s Total Drama friends until they saw DJ and Jasmine waving a large sign reading “Welcome back, Lincoln!”

No silver or no gold

Could dress me up so good

You’re the glitter in the darkness of my world

Lincoln smiled when he saw his girlfriend Dawn, his pet platypus Edward, his best friends Bridgette, DJ, and Harold, his Killer Bass teammates Courtney, Duncan, Eva, Katie, and Sadie, his Screaming Gaffers teammates Gwen, Jasmine, Leshawna, Mike, and Trent, and his alliance mates Izzy and Lindsay. In addition, Izzy’s boyfriend Owen and his coconut companion Mr. Coconut were there, along with Lindsay’s best friend Beth and her boyfriend Tyler, as well as Mike’s crush Zoey. Dawn’s parents Jacob and Hope were also there along with their pet raccoon Maple, and so was DJ’s Momma, Duncan’s parents Mr. and Mrs. Green (as well as his parole officer), Gwen’s mother, her brother, and her cousin Ella, and Owen’s parents.

Just tell me what to do

I’ll fall right into you

Going under cast a spell

Just say the word

I feel your love

Standing next to Leshawna was a tall and curvy girl with long brown hair and hazel eyes. She wore a dark grey jacket-shirt, dark grey pants, dark red heels, red hoop earrings, and a dark grey beanie. This was Leshawna’s cousin, Leshaniqua. Meanwhile, standing next to Owen was a short boy who was around the same age as Ella and Lucy. He had pale skin, purple hair, and black eyes. He also wore a long-sleeved grey shirt, grey pants, and white shoes with tan soles. This was Owen’s cousin, Max.

Boom! Clap!

The sound of my heart

The beat goes on and on and on and on and

Boom! Clap!

You make me feel good

Come on to me, come on to me now

Lincoln smiled as he dropped his luggage and ran over to his girlfriend and Edward and gave them a big hug, and they were soon joined by all their friends from both seasons, as well as Dawn’s parents.

Boom! Clap!

The sound of my heart

The beat goes on and on and on and on and

Boom! Clap!

You make me feel good

Come on to me, come on to me now

“It’s great to see all you guys again!” Lincoln laughed as they separated, before gesturing to his family. “Everyone, I want you to meet my parents, Rita and Lynn Sr., my sisters Leni, Luna, Luan, Lynn, Lucy, Lana, Lola, Lisa, and Lily (though some of you have already met her before in Total Drama Action), Luna’s girlfriend Samantha Sharp, and Luan’s boyfriend Benjamin Stein.”

“Hi!/Hello!/Hiya!/Salutations!” Lincoln’s family greeted the crowd.

“Wow, Mike,” Zoey whispered. “Lincoln was not kidding when he said that he had 10 sisters.”

“I know, right?” Mike asked.

“Ooh, this is so exciting!” Lindsay squealed, before she looked confused. “But which one’s Lori?”

“Lori’s not here!” Everyone, particularly Lincoln, Dawn, Beth, and Tyler, reminded her.

“Oh, right,” Lindsay realized. “Bummer.”

You are the light and I will follow

Immediately, Owen recognized Luna and ran excitedly over to her. “You’re Luna, right?” He asked. “As in, Lincoln’s sister Luna?”

“Yeah, that’s right, dude,” Luna nodded.

“Oh, that is so awesome!” Owen geeked out, putting Mr. Coconut away before pulling Luna in for a crushing hug. “Come here!”

“Whoa, hey!” Luna yelped. “We got a hugger!”

You let me lose my shadow

Gwen and Trent came up to Owen and managed to pry him away from Luna, just as Sam came running up to her girlfriend.

“Are you all right, Lunes?” Sam asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine, Sammy,” Luna assured. “Man! And I thought Uncle Lance’s hugs were bear-crushing.”

“Yeah, sorry about that,” Gwen apologized as she and Trent walked up. “He’s a big hugger.”

“Yeah, I noticed,” Luna remarked. “Oh, I’m Luna, by the way, and this is my girlfriend Sam.”

“Hi,” Sam said.

“I’m Gwen,” Gwen introduced herself. “It’s really nice to meet you both.”

“And I’m Trent,” Trent introduced himself as he and Gwen each shook Luna and Sam’s hands. “It’s a tremendous honor to meet fellow musicians such as yourselves. Lincoln’s told me all about you.”

“Aw, shucks,” Luna blushed.

You are the sun, the glowing halo

Owen was now talking to Luan, and brought Mr. Coconuts back out. “Do you have a Mr. Coconut too, Luan?” He asked.

“Of course I do!” Luan said eagerly, bringing out her ventriloquist puppet, Mr. Coconuts, before she talked in his voice.

“I’ve known Luan since she was 8!” Mr. Coconuts said. “She never goes anywhere without me.”

“Holy crap!” Owen exclaimed. “Your Mr. Coconuts talks!” He then looked at his friend and sighed. “I wish my Mr. Coconut can talk.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Mr. Coconuts asked, offended. “You think I like giving people the silent treatment?”

“Okay, that’s enough, Mr. C!” Luan scolded, bringing Mr. Coconuts close to her. “Owen’s Mr. Coconut is an actual coconut, so he can’t talk! Show some compassion for once!”

Mr. Coconuts sighed. “Okay,” He said.

“Good,” Luan said satisfied, before putting Mr. Coconuts away, prompting Owen to do the same with Mr. Coconuts.

Over by the side, Izzy and Benny watched their respective partners interacting.

“Owen’s so goofy,” Izzy said dreamily. “I knew I made the right choice.”

“Ditto with me and Luan,” Benny said in agreement. “She’s the only girl I knows who makes me laugh.”

And you keep burning me up with all your love, uh

Leni, Lola, Lindsay, Katie, Sadie, Lynn, Eva, and Tyler were all talking to each other.

“Aw, you’re so cute!” Lindsay complimented Lola with a squeal.

“Why, thank you,” Lola said modestly. “I aim to please.”

“But your little sister Lily will always be the cutest!” Lindsay said innocently.

“Oh, yes, she is,” Lola said through gritted teeth.

“OMGosh!” Katie and Sadie said in unison. “It’s Leni Loud!”

“Where?” Leni asked.

“You, silly!” Katie and Sadie laughed.

“Oh, right!” Leni realized.

“I’ve seen your blog,” Katie told Leni. “You give great fashion advice.”

“I’ve seen it too!” Sadie said. “You and Carlota Casagrande should definitely collaborate on a blog together!”

“Huh, I’ve never thought of that,” Leni mused. “Maybe I should try it.”

“Friend punch!” Lynn said, slugging Eva and Tyler on the arm.

“Ow!” Tyler cried. “Why did you do that?!”

“I always give friend punches when I meet new people,” Lynn explained.

Eva then grabbed Lynn by the collar and pulled her close. “Never do that again unless I say so,” She gave the athletic Loud sister a seethed warning. “Got it?!”

“I got it, I got it!” Lynn answered. “Now can you please let me go?”

Eva complied and released Lynn from her grip.

Boom! Clap!

The sound of my heart

The beat goes on and on and on and on and

Boom! Clap!

You make me feel good

Come on to me, come on to me now

Meanwhile, Rita and Lynn Sr. were talking to Duncan’s parents.

“Your son is such a wonderful role model, Mr. and Mrs. Loud,” Mrs. Green began.

“Yes, he’s been a good influence on everyone,” Mr. Green added. “He even convinced our son to turn his mischievous behavior around.”

“With Courtney’s help of course,” Mrs. Green chimed in.

“Why, thank you, Mr. and Mrs. Green,” Lynn Sr. blushed.

“Our son does have that effect on people,” Rita smiled, before she frowned slightly. “Most of the time.”

Boom! Clap!

The sound of my heart

The beat goes on and on and on and on and

Boom! Clap!

You make me feel good

Come on to me, come on to me now

Lucy and Lisa were talking to Ella and Max.

“Hello,” She simply said.

“Why do you sound so sad?” Ella asked. “Don’t you like to laugh and sing?” She then let out a hearty laugh.

“No,” Lucy replied. “Well, maybe I do. Sometimes. But being dark and gloomy is who I am.”

“Well, if you say so…” Ella shrugged.

“You a scientist?” Lisa asked.

“An evil scientist!” Max clarified. “And it is my lifelong dream to take over the world!” He then laughed evilly.

“With what?” Lisa asked.

“Why, with robots, of course!” Max replied. “Say, why don’t you join me? With my evil brains and your knowledge in robotics, we can rule the world together!”

“Uh, no thanks,” Lisa politely declined, slowly backing away. “I’m good.”

Boom! Clap!

The sound of my heart

The beat goes on and on and on and on and

Boom! Clap!

You make me feel good

Come on to me, come on to me now

At that point, Gwen walked up to her cousin and Lucy.

“Hey, Ella,” She said. “What’s the matter?”

“Lucy won’t smile,” Ella said sadly.

Gwen turned to Lincoln’s spooky sister. “Is this true, Lucy?” She asked.

“Sigh. Yes,” Lucy answered. “Being happy’s just not my thing.”

“I know how you feel, Lucy,” Gwen sympathized.

“You do?” Lucy asked.

“Yeah,” Gwen nodded. “I used to be dark and brooding like you, but after I joined the show and made many friends, I allowed myself to open up a little more. Maybe you should try it.”

Lucy cracked a small smile. “Okay,” She said. “I’ll try.”

“That’s more like it,” Gwen smiled. “I think you and my cousin are gonna get along just fine.”

Boom! Clap!

The sound of my heart

The beat goes on and on and on and on and

Boom! Clap!

You make me feel good

Come on to me, come on to me now

“Are you ready for your first Christmas in Canada, Lincoln?” Bridgette asked her best friend.

“I sure am, Bridgette!” Lincoln grinned. “And this time, we won’t have any Ronnie Anne or Geoff to ruin it.”

Bridgette’s smile dropped after hearing Lincoln mention his ex and her ex.

“Um, Lincoln?” Dawn asked her boyfriend, noticing Bridgette’s sad expression. “Read the room.”

“Oh, right. I’m sorry, Bridgette,” Lincoln apologized.

“Stop saying you’re sorry, Lincoln!” Bridgette snapped. “I swear to God, if you say sorry one more time, I’m gonna kick you in the kiwis so hard, your grandchildren are gonna feel it!”

“Go ahead!” Lincoln dared. “My kiwis are practically nonexistent after what Heather did to me when I was eliminated at the final four in season one!”

Lincoln and Bridgette glared at each other, while Dawn watched nervously. Suddenly, Bridgette and Lincoln started laughing, as they were only joking, making Dawn sigh in relief.

“Thanks for trying to cheer me up, Lincoln,” Bridgette said. “I may be over Geoff, but I still haven’t forgotten what he did to you.”

“You do know that it’s in the past know, right?” Lincoln asked. “Besides, I saw how sorry Ronnie Anne was myself. We even promised we would be civil to each other after Leandro and Lucita were born.”

“Thanks Lincoln, but I’ll believe that when I see it,” Bridgette sighed.

Bridgette walked off as Dawn and Lincoln looked at her sympathetically.

“Well, I’ve done all I can do,” Lincoln said sadly. “If only there was another way I could convince her. I mean, I am the Master of Convincing, after all.”

“Sometimes actions speak louder than words, Lincoln,” Dawn told her boyfriend. “I know you’ll think of something.”

She then kissed Lincoln on the cheek, cheering him up.

“Thanks, Dawn,” Lincoln smiled. “You know exactly how to make me feel better.”

“Of course,” Dawn smiled back, kissing Lincoln again.

“So, are we gonna get this show on the road?” Jacob asked. “We should be getting to the hotel soon.”

“Yes, the check-in policy at the Grand Overlook Hotel is usually strict,” Hope added. “We’d better hurry if we want to make our check-in on time.”

Everyone went silent and made an immediate dash for the taxis, with Lincoln and Dawn taking one together. They arrived at the hotel, ran inside, got their keycards, and went up to their rooms.

As the families got settled in, Lincoln was a bit bummed about not being able to share with Dawn, due to their parents having already taken precautions to keep the two from “touching,” but he settled on sharing a room with Bridgette and Lily. As he laid down on the bed, he started thinking of ways to convince Bridgette that Ronnie Anne had changed, but nothing good came up, so all he could do was think about how his ex was doing.

“I wonder how Ronnie Anne’s doing?” He asked himself. “I hope she’s doing okay.”

Lily gave her brother a knowing look, as she was thinking the same thing. She wanted to help Bridgette too, for she knew Ronnie Anne better than her, but she didn’t know how yet.

Chapter Text

4 Days Until Christmas

In Great Lakes City, Illinois, the Casagrandes were getting ready to celebrate Las Posadas in their apartment. Frida was getting her camera ready to take pictures, Lalo was wearing a Santa hat, Hector was napping in the living room, Sergio was flying around, Carlos was walking around reading a book, Maria was guiding Carlos to make sure he didn’t bump into anything, CJ was helping Carlitos decorate the tree, Carl was prepping the piñata, and Rosa and Ronnie Anne were in the kitchen.

“You didn’t rig the piñata this year, did you, Carl?” CJ asked. “You know how Abuela gets.”

“Don’t worry, CJ,” Carl assured. “I’ve learned from my experiences.” As CJ lifted Carlitos up to put the star on top of the tree, Carl then whispered to himself. “As in, I’ve learned how to keep Abuela from finding out what happened to all the candy.”

He chuckled sinisterly as he felt around in his pocket, as he took it all out of the piñata and put it in his room before setting it up. Ronnie Anne then stepped out of the kitchen, covered from head to toe in masa, and looked around the living room.

“Okay, guys, I’m officially done with masa duty,” She said as she sat down on the couch. “Great job this year, going all out for Leandro and Lucita’s first Las Posadas with us.”

“Thanks, cuz,” Carl replied. “Hey, I composed a new Las Posadas song this year. Wanna hear it?”

“Sure,” Ronnie Anne accepted.

“Let’s show her, boys,” Carl told CJ and Carlitos as his brothers gathered around him, before he got out a guitar from behind his back. “I call this song the Las Posadas Song Song.”

Carl then started to play the guitar and sing.

Carl:

Let’s gather around the Christmas tree and sing our Las Posadas song

Our L-A-S P-O-S-A-D-A-S S-O-N-G song

And if you don’t think that we can’t sing it faster, then you’re wrong

But it’ll help if you just sing along

CJ:

Bum, bum, bum…

Suddenly, Carl started singing and playing faster.

Carl:

L-A-S P-O-S-A-D-A-S S-O-N-G song, L-A-S P-O-S-A-D-A-S S-O-N-G song

As Carl continued to sing, CJ and Carlitos were struggling to keep up, while Ronnie Anne didn’t sing at all.

Carl:

And if you don’t think that we can’t sing it faster, then you’re wrong

But it’ll help if you just sing along

Carlitos:

Singing a song

Carl:

L-A-S P-O-S-A-D-A-S S-O-N-G song, CJ!

CJ:

Song! L-A-S P-O-S-A-D-A-S…

Carl:

Carlitos!

“I totally forgot what we were singing about,” Carlitos said.

“Good!” Carl said as he went back to singing.

Carl:

Ronnie Anne!

Ronnie Anne didn’t say anything. She just sat there grumpily in silence.

“Close enough,” Carl shrugged, before he prepared for the big finale.

Carl:

It’ll help

CJ was now playing on a drumkit as he and Carl appeared on a stage with fireworks going off around them.

Carl:

It’ll help, if you just sing along!

Carl jumped off the stage and smashed his guitar on the floor, then CJ walked up and slammed his drums onto Carl.

“OH, YEAH!!!” Carl shouted, popping out of the drum.

The song ended as they sat on the couch with Ronnie Anne and Carlitos.

“Now, wasn’t that relaxing?” Carl sighed happily.

“No,” Ronnie Anne said honestly. “That song was way too loud, too fast, and too…”

“Awesome?” Carl interrupted. “Rocking? Las Posadas-y?”

“That’s not even a word,” Ronnie Anne deadpanned. “What I was trying to say was that song was way too wild. Leandro and Lucita are only two months old. So can you, maybe, tone it down with the rock n’ roll?”

Carl sighed. “Oh, okay,” He said.

“Good,” Ronnie Anne nodded approvingly, before gesturing to the smashed instruments on the floor. “Now I gotta clean up this mess before Lori, Bobby, the twins, Carlota, and Dad get here.”

She got up off the couch and started picking them up, when the doorbell rang.

“Oh, no!” Ronnie Anne cried. “Not now!”

She hurried over to the garbage can and stuffed whatever remained of the instruments into them, then rushed to join the rest of the family at the door as they greeted Lori, Bobby, Leandro, Lucita, Carlota, and Arturo, who had just arrived.

“Feliz Navidad!” Lori and Bobby said in unison as Leandro and Lucita gurgled in their arms.

“And Feliz Las Posadas!” Arturo and Carlota greeted.

The six of them then stepped inside, with Lori holding Lucita and Bobby holding Leandro, and then Frida started taking pictures of the whole family, finishing with a big group picture. After pictures were done, Ronnie Anne turned to face her father.

“Dad, what are you doing here?” She asked as she hugged Arturo.

“Well, you’re mi familia, aren’t you?” Arturo said, hugging back. “Can a man not come to his family’s apartment to celebrate Las Posadas?”

“I guess you’re right,” Ronnie Anne chuckled as she and Arturo separated, then she made her way over to her brother, her sister-in-law, and her niece and nephew.

“Lori, Bobby, you’re early,” She scolded them in a joking tone. “You guys said you weren’t coming until tomorrow.”

“Well, Bobby and I got our work done earlier than we expected,” Lori explained. “I mean, it is the holidays, after all.”

“So we decided to spend the rest of Las Posadas with you,” Bobby added, before turning to his maternal grandmother. “If that’s all right with you, Abuela.”

“Si, of course it is,” Rosa nodded happily. “We would love to spend more time with you, Lori, and the twins.”

“Great!” Lori and Bobby both grinned.

Finally, Ronnie Anne approached her oldest cousin. “Carlota…” She began.

Before she could say anything else, Carlota pulled her prima in for a heartwarming hug.

“I missed you too, Ronnie Anne,” She said. “And I know you didn’t mean everything you said or did on the show.”

“How could you tell?” Ronnie Anne asked.

“I kinda expected you were eavesdropping when I was venting to Dawn at Thanksgiving,” Carlota explained. “Besides, you helping out at the hospital and defending us from those reporters kind of makes up for it.”

Ronnie Anne smiled and had tears in her eyes as she and Carlota hugged again. Carlota soon separated, though, then got out two saddles and walked over to Lalo, and then strapped the saddles onto him.

“What are those for, Carlota?” Frida asked.

“For Leandro and Lucita,” Carlota explained. “This way, they’ll have something to ride on so Lori and Bobby don’t get tired carrying them everywhere when we go out to sing villancicos.” She then turned to her same-aged cousin and his wife. “If that’s all right with you two, of course.”

“Of course it is, Carlota,” Bobby smiled.

“We love our children, but it can literally be stressful taking care of them,” Lori added.

“Are we going out to sing villancicos now?” Ronnie Anne asked. “I haven’t even invited anyone yet! I’ll go do that right now. Don’t start without me!”

She got on her winter jacket and dashed out of the apartment.

“Ronnie Anne, get back here!” Maria called.

“Let her go, Maria,” Carlos told his sister. “Ronnie Anne wants to prove herself as more responsible, right? Who are we to deny her that chance?”

“I guess you’re right, Carlos,” Maria admitted.

Ronnie Anne ran up and down the stairs of the apartment, visiting her neighbors on each floor and inviting them to come join singing villancicos with her and her family, and they accepted. However, she saved a specific apartment on the third floor for last, Apartment 3A, the residence of her ex-best friend, Sid Chang.

“Come on, Ronnie Anne, you can do this,” Ronnie Anne said to herself. “You haven’t talked to Sid since you came home from Total Drama. This is your chance to tell her how much you’ve changed.”

Taking a deep breath, Ronnie Anne knocked on the door, and someone answered it, but it wasn’t Sid. Instead, it was a preteen Chinese-American girl with light skin and dark brunette hair tied into two pigtails with red bands. She wore a red button-up sleeveless shirt with a yellow button in the center and a white Peter Pan collar, along with a purple pencil skirt and black sneakers. This was Adelaide Chang, Sid’s younger sister.

“Hi, Ronnie Anne!” Adelaide greeted happily.

“Hey, Adelaide,” Ronnie Anne smiled nervously. “Is your sister home?”

“Tell Ronnie Anne I’m not here, Adelaide!” A second female’s voice barked from inside the apartment.

“Sid!” A third female’s voice scolded, before calling out to Adelaide. “Tell Ronnie Anne we’ll be right there!”

“Okay!” Adelaide called back.

Ronnie Anne braced herself for the inevitable confrontation as the two females joined Adelaide at the entrance of the apartment. The first female was a light-skinned woman in her late 40s with long blonde hair that reached all the way to her shoulders and freckles on her face. She wore a dark green T-shirt, mint green jeans, white flats, and gold earrings. This was Rebecca “Becca” Chang, Sid and Adelaide’s mother. The second female was a teenage Chinese-American girl who was around the same age as Ronnie Anne. She had long brown hair that reached all the way down to her waist and freckles like her mother. She wore a blue long-sleeved shirt, black leggings, red knee-high socks, black and white shoes, as well as white earrings. This was Sidney “Sid” Chang, Adelaide’s older sister and Ronnie Anne’s ex-best friend.

Ronnie Anne immediately took note of Sid’s facial expression: disappointment, with a mixture of hurt and anger, like she was not happy to see her ex-best friend standing at her front door.

“What do you want?” Sid asked rudely.

“Sid, that is no way to treat our guests!” Becca scolded. “Forgive me, Ronnie Anne. Sid hasn’t been herself since she found out you were the cause of Geoff and Bridgette’s breakup.”

Ronnie Anne waved her off.

“Mom, Adelaide, get inside,” Sid ordered.

“But Sid-” Becca began.

“No ‘buts,’ Mom!” Sid interrupted. “This is between Ronnie Anne and me!”

“Come on, Adelaide,” Becca said to her younger daughter. “Let’s leave Sid and Ronnie Anne be.” She then said firmly to Sid. “And no harsh language, okay, Sid?”

“I’ll try but no promises,” Sid muttered under her breath as Becca and Adelaide retreated into the apartment, and then Becca shut the door, leaving Sid and Ronnie Anne alone.

“Why are you here?” Sid asked her ex-best friend.

“I just wanted to invite you and your family to join our Las Posadas celebration,” Ronnie Anne offered.

“Nice try, but I’m not falling for that,” Sid scoffed. “You’ve lied so much on the show I can’t tell whether you’re lying or not.”

“I’m not lying!” Ronnie Anne insisted. “I said I was sorry, Sid! I helped my family and Lori at the hospital, and I defended them from a couple of sleazy reporters on Thanksgiving! What more do you want from me?!”

“Get Bridgette and Geoff back together,” Sid gave Ronnie Anne her one condition.

“No,” Ronnie Anne shook her head. “Not that.”

“Yes, that,” Sid nodded.

“You know why I can’t do that,” Ronnie Anne told Sid. “Besides, I’m not even sure Bridgette and Geoff want to get back together.”

“Then consider yourself unfriended,” Sid said coldly. “As of this moment, we are no longer best friends!”

“Sid, please!” Ronnie Anne begged. “You can’t do this to me! You’re my best friend!”

“Yeah, I was,” Sid said bitterly. “But not anymore. And to think I thought you actually changed.”

Sid then walked back into her apartment, slamming the door behind her. Ronnie Anne covered her face in her hands and walked sadly down the stairs back to Apartment 2A.

Inside Apartment 3A, Sid dusted her hands as she walked away from the door, when she saw her mother standing sternly in front of her.

“What?” She asked.

“You know what,” Becca said. “What did you say to Ronnie Anne?”

“Nothing too bad,” Sid assured. “I just said we were no longer friends.”

“What?!” Adelaide shouted, running in. “How could you say that to Ronnie Anne?!”

“She deserves it!” Sid argued. “She was just a huge jerk on the show, and now she’s getting what she deserves!”

“Still, that doesn’t mean you need to hold this against her for the rest of your life!” Becca scolded.

“So we’ll never see Ronnie Anne again?” Adelaide asked as tears welled up in her eyes. “As in, never ever?”

Sid didn’t say anything, confirming Adelaide’s worst fears. She then walked over to the armoire and opened it up.

“If anyone needs me, I’ll be in my crying cabinet!” She sobbed as she stepped inside, shut the door, and started crying her eyes out.

Seeing her sister cry after she disowned Ronnie Anne as a friend broke Sid’s heart, but Becca stood in front of Sid to stop her from trying to comfort her sister.

“I think you’ve done enough today,” She said. “You’ve upset your best friend who’s genuinely trying to change, you’ve upset your sister, and you’ve upset me.”

“Oh, spare me the lecture, Mom!” Sid moaned angrily.

“Don’t talk back to me!” Becca snapped. “Okay, you know what? That is it! You are grounded for the rest of Las Posadas, including Christmas Eve!”

“What?!” Sid asked in shock. “You can’t do that!”

“I can, and I have!” Becca retorted. “You’re lucky you’ll be ungrounded on Christmas Day.”

“Well, at least in a year from now, I won’t have to live by your rules under your house, Mom!” Sid said angrily as she stormed off to her room.

“Go to your room!” Becca yelled to her elder daughter.

“I’m already in my room!” Sid yelled back as she shut the door.

Becca then marched over to the couch, grabbed one of the pillows, and screamed into it. In her room, Sid did the same with the pillow on her bed, before she laid down on it.

Down in Apartment 2A, Ronnie Anne laid on her bed, with her jacket resting on her desk chair, depressed that she couldn’t patch things up with Sid. Just then, Maria walked in.

“Ronnie Anne?” She asked. “Are you all right?”

“No, Mom, I’m not,” Ronnie Anne sniffed. “I just lost my best friend.”

Ronnie Anne sat up on the bed as Maria sat down next to her, and then she cried into her mother’s chest as Maria comforted her.

“Are we still doing villancicos?” Maria asked.

“I don’t know, Mom,” Ronnie Anne sighed. “It just won’t be the same without Sid.”

“Who needs Sid?” Maria asked dismissively. “If she’s not being fair to you, then maybe it’s time you moved on from her and start finding new friends. Ronnie Anne, I know you were experiencing a depression when you came home, but we didn’t notice it until Lincoln pointed it out to us. That was why we switched you over to Dr. Lopez. And the last thing we want is for you to experience a relapse, mija. You still have your whole life ahead of you, and I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you chose to end your life prematurely.”

Ronnie Anne cheered up at her mother’s words, but she was still sad after everything that went down between her and Sid.

“Okay,” She finally said. “I’ll try.”

“That’s more like it,” Maria said satisfied. “Now, are we doing villancicos or not?”

“Yeah, sure,” Ronnie Anne replied, standing up and picking up her jacket, before putting her back on. Maria then stood up herself as she followed Ronnie Anne out of the room.

Chapter Text

That night at the Detroit airport, Chandler, Zach, Rusty, Liam, Stella, and Kara were still waiting at the gate where the Louds’ plane took off, when Clyde came up to them.

“Guys!” He called, before adding snidely. “And Chandler.”

“What is it, McBride?” Chandler asked, clearly offended by that last part Clyde said.

“I talked to the ticket guys, and they said that they can put us on the earliest flight tomorrow!” Clyde explained excitedly.

The others stared at Clyde, before his friends got excited as well.

“No, way!” Stella and Kara cheered, hi-fiving each other.

“All right!” Zach and Rusty grinned, also sharing a hi-five.

“Howdya do it, Clyde?” Liam asked.

“Uh, I’m the Guy Who Makes You Fly, hello?” Clyde replied. “I knew that my skills would come in handy, and I was right.”

“Huh. Not bad,” Chandler surprisingly admitted. “Nice work, McBride.”

“Thanks,” Clyde smiled.

“So, when’s the flight?” Stella asked.

“5:00 a.m.,” Clyde revealed, making everyone else groan, except Liam of course. “What? It was the earliest flight they had available!”

“Should be easy for me,” Liam bragged. “Ah wake up at 5:00 in the morning every time on mah farm.”

3 Days Until Christmas

At 6:30 a.m., the flight with Chandler and Lincoln’s friends finally landed at the Toronto airport. Chandler was eager to get to the Grand Overlook Hotel as fast as possible, but Clyde stopped him before he could call for a taxi.

“Hang on a minute, Chandler!” He said. “Shouldn’t we come up with a plan first?”

“Pfft. And why should we?” Chandler scoffed.

“You think they would just automatically let someone who stole someone else’s ticket and six others who have scalped tickets into one of the most expensive hotels in Toronto?” Clyde asked.

“Okay, maybe you have a point,” Chandler conceded. “So, Mr. Guy Who Makes You Fly, what do you suggest we do?”

“We infiltrate the hotel disguised as hotel staff members,” Clyde explained. “I’m commencing Operation Hotel Hangout.”

“Hit us, Clyde,” Rusty said as the others and Chandler gathered around him.

“Okay, here’s what we do,” Clyde began. “Liam, you’ll be the bellhop; I’ll be kitchen staff; Rusty, you’ll be a laundry attendant.”

“Should be easy for me,” Rusty bragged. “My dad owns a tux shop.”

“I’m sorry, but who’s the leader when Lincoln’s not here?” Chandler reminded them. “Me! So I’m calling the shots.”

“But I’m the one who made this plan!” Clyde defended.

“Yeah, yeah, move aside, McBride,” Chandler dismissed, shoving Clyde aside and taking over Operation Hotel Hangout. “Okay, McBride, you’ll still be in the kitchen. Spokes, you’re still on laundry duty. Farm boy, you can still be the bellhop.”

“And what am I gonna be?” Zach asked.

“Gurdle, you’re the janitor,” Chandler told him.

“And I immediately regret asking,” Zach deadpanned.

“So what do we get?” Stella asked on her and Kara’s behalf.

“You’re on housekeeping duty,” Chandler replied.

“What?!” Kara exclaimed. “This is outrageous! We’ve been typecast as women who do traditional women roles! Stella and I are tomboys!”

“You got a better idea?” Chandler asked.

“Fine,” Kara sighed, knowing there was no way to argue with Chandler like this.

“And that leaves me with the hottest job in the hotel,” Chandler smirked.

“And what would that be?” Stella asked.

“I get to work in the spa!” Chandler bragged. “Picking up on all those chicks, giving spa treatments, and all the perks that come with it. I’ve got the best job on the planet!”

“Okay, if we wanna save Lincoln, we’d better get going,” Clyde told the others. “So let’s get going.”

They were about to run outside to call a taxi when Stella grabbed Clyde’s arm, stopping him.

“Clyde, are you sure this is a good idea?” Stella asked.

“Come on, guys!” Clyde pleaded. “Are you seriously giving up on Lincoln now?”

“It’s not that we’re givin’ up on him, Clyde,” Liam explained. “Maybe we shoulda talked things out with him before he left.”

“I’m with Liam on this one,” Kara agreed.

“Hey, losers!” Chandler called from outside, as he was trying to hail a cab. “You coming?”

The six friends sighed, knowing now wasn’t a good time to talk about it, and they followed after Chandler.

During the taxi ride to the hotel, Clyde took some costumes out of his suitcase, as he took the precaution of packing the clothes ahead of time, and handed them out to the others. Once they arrived at the Grand Overlook, the seven of them stepped out of the cab, now dressed in their costumes, and walked inside up to the front counter. Clyde was dressed a chef, Chandler wore a spa worker’s uniform, Rusty had a laundry attendant’s uniform on, Liam was dressed a bellhop, and Stella and Kara were in French maid outfits.

“Can I help you?” The hotel concierge asked.

“Yes,” Chandler replied. “Can we please see the hotel manager?”

“You have an appointment?” The concierge asked.

“We’re the new staff,” Chandler explained, gesturing to himself and the others. “We applied for jobs here. If you don’t believe us, I could give you my resume.”

He then took a resume out and handed it to the concierge, who looked over it. Despite Chandler being well aware that the resume was a fake, the concierge fell for it.

“This is a very good resume,” The concierge said. “I’ll call the manager over right away.”

The concierge then picked up the phone and started calling the manager, while Chandler turned back to the others.

“That was a fake resume, wasn’t it?” Clyde guessed.

“How’d you guess?” Chandler asked.

“You really think you had enough time to write a resume before we came here?” Zach asked. “Even I couldn’t have done that.”

“And what if we get caught?” Liam asked worriedly.

“I’m too cool to go to jail!” Rusty cried.

“Shh!” Chandler shushed them, silencing them. “Keep it down! We don’t want them to find out!”

At that moment, the hotel manager walked up to them and told them. “You’re hired.”

“Wait, really?” Stella asked, surprised.

“Of course,” The hotel manager nodded. “Welcome to the club.”

Lincoln’s friends and Chandler blinked in disbelief as the hotel manager walked off.

“Huh. That was easy,” Kara let out.

“Well, what are we waiting for?” Chandler asked. “McBride, get in the kitchen! Farm boy, start taking people’s bags! Spokes, get down to the laundry room! Gurdle, find the janitor’s closet! Stella and Kara, find a cleaning card and see if you can find Lincoln’s room!”

“And what are you gonna do?” Kara asked.

“I’m gonna be at the spa, picking up chicks while keeping an eye out for Loud or any of his sisters and their Total Drama friends,” Chandler explained.

“And you’re gonna pay us back, right?” Liam asked.

“You can’t always get what you want, farm boy,” Chandler replied. “Now, let’s get to work!”

Chandler then walked off towards the spa while Clyde and his friends looked at each other.

“So, anyone else having second thoughts about this?” Rusty asked.

“I know I am,” Zach sighed.

Kara opened her mouth to say something, when Clyde silenced her.

“No, Kara, we will not admit it!” He snapped at her. “I will never admit that I’m wrong, not until we save Lincoln! Now, come on!”

Clyde then ran off to the kitchen, while the others took their positions with Liam at the front entrance, Rusty in the laundry room, Zach in the janitor’s closet, and Stella and Kara getting a cleaning cart.

Inside the spa, Leni and Lola were relaxing with Lindsay, Beth, Katie, and Sadie.

It’s spa day

A day to unwind

Leni, Lindsay, and Beth were getting massages, complete with cucumber facials and spa workers walking on their backs.

We’ll walk on your spine

You’ll be fine

It’s a-

Suddenly, the song turned into a seaweed rap tune as Harold appeared on the screen, dressed in his rapper attire.

Harold:

It’s a spa day!

H-Bomb on the scene!

Gonna slather you with butter,

Make you feel like a queen

Get you sittin’ in a hot tub-

Katie and Sadie were shown relaxing in a hot tub.

Katie and Sadie:

Loungin’!

Harold:

You’re thinkin’ this place is-

Leni, Lindsay, and Beth:

Astoundin’!

Harold:

Hot steam, hot stones, hot water, hot wax!

“Ahhh! Kelly Clarkson!” A man’s voice screamed in the background after receiving a hot wax.

Harold:

We’re poppin’ cool new age music, can’t help but relax!

New-age music played as Lola was wearing headphones while getting both a pedicure and a manicure.

Harold:

It’s a spa day!

Lindsay, Beth, Katie, and Sadie:

Yeah!

Harold:

Shiatsu-

Leni:

Gesundheit!

Harold:

Thank you very much,

We got a salt scrub, mud tub; what’s it gonna be?

A foot bath, a facial, aromatherapy!

Harold, Beth, Lindsay, Katie, and Sadie took a whiff of the candles.

Harold, Beth, Lindsay, Katie, and Sadie:

Yeah, aromatherapy!

Harold:

It’s a spa day!

Beth:

Yeah!

Harold:

Shiatsu!

Leni:

Where you from?

Masseuse:

I’m a Pennsylvania Dutch

Harold:

Sippin’ cucumber water and a big slice of lime,

Throw your clock away, you’re on H-Bomb time!

It’s a-

After all of that, Leni, Lindsay, Beth, Katie, and Sadie were having a spa lunch, which consisted of wraps, sandwiches, fruits, and juices, while Harold had vanished.

Spa day!

“This food is so good!” Sadie relished as she took another bite of her wrap.

“I know, right?” Katie asked, before popping another piece of fruit in her mouth.

“Hey, Lola!” Leni called. “Come over here and get in on this with us!”

“I’ll be there in a minute!” Lola called back. “I haven’t finished my pedicure!” She then turned to the worker, Chandler, who was working on her. “Hey, foot boy! You call that buffing? I wanna see my beautiful face on every toenail!”

Chandler, who was filing Lola’s toenails with a nail file, filed harder, though he grumbled under his breath. “Anything you say, princess.”

“And don’t forget to clean the gunk between my toes!” Lola added.

“Okay, okay!” Chandler complied.

He picked a piece of toe jam in between Lola’s toes and dropped it to the floor, disgusted.

“Yeesh!” He gagged. “Why did I get the most spoiled Loud sister?”

In the room Harold shared with Luna, Sam, and Trent, the former was taking off his rapper attire, when the latter three stepped in, having heard Harold singing, er, rapping, from the hallway.

“Hey, Harold,” Trent said. “Did we just hear you singing?”

“No!” Harold denied. “I was rapping! There’s a difference!”

“But did you have to sing—I mean, rap—so loud?” Sam asked, rubbing her ears with her fingers. “We could basically hear you all the way from outside.”

“Yeah, sorry about that,” Harold chuckled sheepishly. “I’ve been listening to music since I was a kid. Sometimes I get a little carried away.”

Luna then approached Harold and put a hand on his shoulder. “Look, Harold, we get it,” She said. “We all have a passion we’re hooked onto. For me, it’s rock music; like you, I tend to get a little carried away with my passion. Heck, practically everyone in my family calls me ‘the Loudest Loud.’”

“Whoa, really?” Harold asked.

Luna nodded.

“Well, how about this?” Trent offered. “What if Luna, Sam, and I help you with your rapping by playing our instruments?”

“I’d like that,” Harold smiled as Luna, Sam, and Trent got out their guitars.

Out in the hallway, Zach was about to head into the bathroom to clean it, when he heard Harold, Luna, Sam, and Trent talking and pressed his head against the door so he could hear what they were saying.

“So, Luna and Sam are helping Harold and Trent with their singing, huh?” He asked.

He took his head off the door and walked off.

In the hotel’s buffet restaurant, Owen and Izzy sat at one of the tables with Luan and Benny. Owen had four plates in front of him and was rapidly devouring them all. Luan and Benny were watching in amazement, while Izzy was impressed.

“Whoa!” Luan awed.

“Even I couldn’t do that,” Benny noted.

“I’m a big eater myself, you know,” Izzy revealed. “Now that Big O and I are back together, and his jaw is unwired, he’ll be able to eat more than ever!”

“Hey, Owen, wanna hear some jokes?” Luan asked the big guy. “I got my 12 Jokes of Christmas coming on.”

“Sure,” Owen replied, still eating.

“Okay, here we go,” Luan began. “What was Santa’s favorite subject in school?”

“What?” Owen and Izzy both asked.

“Chemis-tree!” Luan punned, before she laughed. “Get it?”

“I do!” Izzy said excitedly, also laughing. “Chemistry is a subject in school, and a Christmas tree is what we use to celebrate Christmas!”

“I’ve never had a Christmas tree,” Benny said. “Come to think of it, I never really celebrate Christmas.”

“You don’t?” Izzy and Owen both asked.

Benny shook his head. “I’m Jewish, and my family celebrates Hanukkah,” He explained. “But now that I’m dating Luan, her and her family are teaching everything they know about Christmas, and hopefully I can do the same with her about Hanukkah.”

“And I appreciate it Benny, merry, merry much,” Luan returned the sentiment, kissing Benny on the cheek.

“Merry, merry, much!” Benny laughed as his girlfriend pulled away from him. “Good one, Luan!”

“Thanks!” Luan beamed.

Over by another table, Lynn, Eva, and Tyler were chowing down on spicy meatball subs for an eating competition. At around his fifth sub, Tyler couldn’t take it anymore.

“How do you keep these things down, Lynn?” He asked. “These subs are too spicy even for me! I need water! Water!”

He then saw Clyde pushing a pitcher of water out on a food trolley and rushed over.

“Hey!” Clyde complained as Tyler snatched it.

Tyler then gulped the water in the pitcher down until there was none left, and then sighed in relief once his thirst was quenched.

“Sorry about that, bro,” Tyler apologized as he put the water pitcher back on the trolley. “It’s just Lynn and Eva are so good at keeping that spicy food down, but I’m not.”

He walked back over to the table he, Eva, and Lynn were at, as Clyde began to scratch his chin.

“Lynn hanging out with Tyler and Eva?” He mused. “Makes sense, since they are sports fanatics. Well, Eva more than Tyler.”

He then walked back into the kitchen to get another pitcher of water.

“So, Lynn, what other kinds of sports do you like to do?” Eva asked.

“Pfft, I can do any sport!” Lynn scoffed. “Softball, soccer, basketball, football, anything!”

“Anything?” Eva asked.

“Uh-oh,” Tyler gulped, seeing that competitive look in Eva’s eye.

In the hotel’s tennis court, Eva and Tyler stood on one side of the court, while Lynn stood on the other, all of them holding tennis rackets.

“You up for a game of Canadian Doubles, Lynn?” Eva asked.

“You bet I am!” Lynn replied with a cocky smirk. “I could beat the both of you with one arm tied behind my back!”

“Eva, I’m not so sure about this,” Tyler said nervously.

“Come on, jockstrap!” Eva encouraged Tyler roughly. “Are you seriously gonna let ‘Lunatic Lynn’ win now?!”

“‘Lunatic Lynn?’” Tyler questioned.

“It’s her nickname for herself,” Eva explained.

“Hey, chumps!” Lynn called as she prepared to serve first. “Service!”

She threw the ball up in the air and hit it with her racket hard, sending it flying past Eva and Tyler.

“Fault!” Eva yelled. “We weren’t ready!”

“That wasn’t a fault!” Lynn argued. “That was a fair ball!”

Tyler could only watch as Eva and Lynn kept arguing over whether the ball was fair or not, knowing it was best not to interfere in a battle of the wills.

In the lobby, Lucy was wandering around, when she bumped into Gwen.

“Hey, Lucy,” Gwen said. “Whatcha doin’?”

“Trying to hunt the ghost of the Grand Overlook,” Lucy replied.

“You like ghost hunting?” Gwen inquired.

Lucy nodded. “One time, Lincoln and I were ghost hunting at this hotel we stayed at with our parents,” She explained. “Sadly, we got kicked out before we could find it.”

“Oh, how I would love to see a real ghost one day,” Gwen said dreamily.

“I have, multiple times,” Lucy thought, remembering all the ghosts she and her family encountered over the years, especially the ghosts of their Scottish ancestors.

“You want me to help you?” Gwen asked. “Four eyes are better than two, after all.”

“Of course,” Lucy accepted, before she saw Stella and Kara pushing a cleaning cart and walked over to them. “Excuse me, can we borrow this?”

“What for?” Stella asked.

“We need a cover to captures the Ghost of the Grand Overlook,” Lucy explained.

“But we just got it!” Kara complained.

Gwen then came up to them. “Sorry, guys, but it’s really important,” She told them.

“Well, if it’s that important, okay,” Stella said, giving it to them.

“Thanks,” Lucy said.

“We’ll promise we’ll give it right back to you,” Gwen promised as they walked off with it.

“How could you cave so easily?” Kara asked Stella.

“Because, Kara, if Clyde hears of Lincoln and his family interacting with the cast of Total Drama, he’ll come up with something to split them up,” Stella told her.

“You know, I’m starting to think this whole trusting Chandler plan was a bad idea,” Kara muttered, before she started to scratch her butt. “And now my costume’s starting to itch.”

In the laundry room, Rusty was doing his job without issue, when he heard one of the drying machines sounding louder than usual, making weird clunking sounds.

“Huh, that’s odd,” He noted. “Did somebody put a lot of clothes in this drying machine, or is it broken?”

He walked over to the drying machine that was making those noises, turned it off, and opened it up, and then Lana jumped out of it.

“Coolest amusement park ride ever!” She said excitedly. “Let’s go again!”

“Okay…” Rusty let out. “I did not expect to see Lana in there.”

“I should probably get outta here now, shouldn’t I?” Lana guessed.

“What do you think, Einstein?” Rusty asked sarcastically.

Lana ran out of the laundry room just as Zach came in and walked up to Rusty.

“See anything, Rusty?” He asked.

“I did see Lana in here a moment ago,” Rusty answered.

“What? Which way did she go?” Zach demanded.

“That way,” Rusty pointed in the direction Lana ran off.

Zach then ran off after her.

On her way back from the spa, Lola could have sworn she heard vocalizing sounds coming from the room she shared with Leni, Lindsay, Beth, Katie, Sadie, and Ella.

“Is that the voice of an angel?” She asked.

She stepped into the room and saw that it was only Ella vocalizing while sitting on her bed.

“Oh, it’s only Gwen’s goody two-shoes cousin,” Lola grumbled.

“Did someone call my name?” Ella asked, turning around, before she saw Lola. “Oh, it’s you, Lola.”

“Ella? That was you?” Lola inquired. “Your singing voice is so beautiful!”

“Why, thank you,” Ella smiled. “Why don’t you come sit on the bed with me, and we’ll talk some more?”

Lola hopped onto the bed and sat down next to Ella.

“So, what’s it like being a princess?” Lola asked. “You are a real princess, aren’t you?”

“Actually, Lola, I’m not a real princess,” Ella explained. “I just dress up as one like you, but I do hope to be a real one someday, like Cinderella, my favorite princess, because my parents named me after her.”

“Did you say your favorite princess was Cinderella?” Lola asked. “Mine too! Well, I like all princesses! Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Rapunzel…”

“Me too!” Ella said excitedly.

The two held their hands and squealed excitedly as they bounced on the bed.

In the room next door, Lisa and Max were doing experiments with chemicals Max brought with him, when they heard Lola and Ella’s shrieking from next door, causing Lisa to accidentally drop the wrong chemical into the wrong beaker, creating an explosion that sent her and Max flying across the room, crashing into the wall.

“You and your sisters really know how to live up to your last name, don’t you?” Max asked Lisa as they got back up.

“At least I try to be one of the more quieter Louds,” Lisa retorted, before she looked around the damage done to the room. “Then again, I’d hate to be the poor homosapien who has to clean this mess up.”

“Might I suggest we head down to the pig out party for some confectionaries while housekeeping cleans up our room?” Max suggested.

“You mean you want to head down to the buffet for some dessert as our room is being cleaned,” Lisa translated.

“That’s what I just said,” Max confirmed as they left the room.

Stella and Kara then came into the room just after Lisa and Max left and were shocked upon seeing how messy it was.

“What happened here?” Kara asked. “Looks like a tornado hit this place.”

“Lisa, no doubt,” Stella deduced. “Come on, let’s get to cleaning.”

“But we don’t have a cleaning cart, remember?” Kara reminded her. “We gave it to Lucy and Gwen.”

“Oh, right,” Stella realized. “Well, maybe someone else can handle it. Come on, let’s go find Clyde and the others.”

Kara nodded as they too walked off.

In the hotel’s indoor swimming pool, Lily was standing on the shallow end while Bridgette stood in the middle, both of them in their bathing suits. Lily then used her feet to push herself off the wall and swam over to Bridgette, who was there to catch her when she got to her.

“Great job, Lily!” Bridgette complimented. “You’re getting better.”

“Thanks, Bridgette!” Lily smiled. “And thanks for babysitting me while Linky and Dawn are on a date.”

“Anytime” Bridgette winked at the littlest Loud. “Speaking of your brother and Dawn, where are they?”

“In the hot tub,” Lily replied. “But it’s for big kids and adults only.”

“It’s for safety reasons, Lily,” Bridgette told her. “You’ll-”

“I know, I know,” Lily interrupted her. “I’ll understand when I’m older.”

Over by the hot tub, Lincoln and Dawn were sitting next to each other and making out while their respective parents watched.

“Well, at least they’re being more tame this time,” Rita said.

“I know,” Jacob agreed. “I was just as shocked as you when Lincoln admitted it on international television.”

“Honestly, Mr. and Mrs. Loud, I don’t know how you do it,” Mr. Green, who was lounging next to Lynn Sr. and Hope, spoke up. “Managing such a large family with distinct personalities.”

“I know,” Hope agreed. “Sometimes, I’m so glad Dawn’s our only child.”

“Well, you see, Hope and Mr. Green, it’s all about giving the kids freedom to make their own decisions,” Lynn Sr. explained. “Having 11 kids within the span of 17 years gave us plenty of experience.”

“Even though some of your attempts are a little misguided?” Hope questioned playfully.

“Okay, I’ll let you have that one,” Lynn Sr. conceded.

At that moment, Zach was walking by the pool when he saw Bridgette, Lily, Lincoln, Dawn, Lincoln’s parents, Dawn’s parents, and Duncan’s parents interacting.

“Oh, boy!” He said. “Wait till Chandler hears about this! Score!”

He then ran off to find the others.

Back in the lobby, Chandler and Lincoln’s friends had regrouped, except Zach and Liam.

“Where’s farm boy and the alien lover?” Chandler asked impatiently.

“I’m here!” Zach called, running up to them. “Don’t start without me!”

“We were just about to,” Chandler grumbled. “Okay, what did you guys find out? Remember, we wanna get good dirt on Lincoln, don’t we?”

“I saw his sporty sister, Lynn, getting into sports competitions with Eva and Tyler,” Clyde began.

“How is that dirt?” Chandler questioned. “Seems like them getting along if you ask me. Now then, anyone else?”

“We had to clean up an explosion caused by Lincoln’s scientific sister Lisa and Owen’s cousin Max,” Stella explained.

“It was not a pretty sight,” Kara shuddered.

“An explosion in a hotel room, eh?” Chandler mused. “Even though chemicals in a hotel aren’t allowed? Now there’s something we can use.” He then turned to Zach. “So, Gurdle, what did you find?”

“I saw Lincoln, Dawn, and Bridgette at the pool,” Zach replied. “They’re obviously hanging out together!”

“Hanging out together?” Chandler repeated, before he began chuckling. “Oh, this is just too rich. Lincoln Lame picking up on two girls at the same time? That is gonna make excellent dirt on him.”

“Yeah. But how exactly are you gonna get it out to everyone, Chandler?” Kara asked.

Chandler froze, realizing that for all his planning, he did not think of how he was going to publicly humiliate Lincoln once he was in Canada.

“Huh. I did not think that one through,” He admitted.

“Guys!” Liam called, joining them while carrying some bags.

“What is it, farm boy?” Chandler asked.

“A couple of reporters are here,” Liam explained. “They say they’re here to see Lincoln.”

“Reporters?” Chandler inquired, before turning to the fourth wall. “Well, that’s new information!”

Those reporters in question turned out to be Desi and Rico, the same ones who confronted Lincoln, Dawn, and Ronnie Anne on Thanksgiving. They stepped into the lobby and looked around for any sign of the Loud boy who gave them grief.

“Where is he?” Rico asked, eager for revenge on Lincoln.

“Take it easy, Rico,” Desi chided him. “We’re here for a slow and painful revenge, not a quick and painful one.”

“Oh, right,” Rico realized.

“Wait, you know Lincoln Lame?” Chandler asked, walking up to them.

“Yeah, that’s right,” Desi nodded.

“And who might you be?” Rico asked.

“Name’s Chandler,” Chandler introduced himself to them. “Chandler McCann.”

“More like Chandler McLame if you ask me,” Kara whispered to the others as they sniggered.

Chandler ignored them and turned back to Desi and Rico. “You got beef with Lincoln, too?” He deduced.

“Yeah,” Desi nodded. “We were just minding our own business, getting the latest scoop on the lives of the contestants post-Total Drama Action…”

“And then he and Ronnie Anne Santiago just had to come along and ruin it for us!” Rico finished angrily. “They pushed us into a lake! They know I can’t swim!”

An evil smile came to Chandler’s face. It looks like he was going to have that leverage to use against Lincoln after all.

“Say, what do you say we make a deal?” He offered. “I know things about Lincoln you don’t know, and you have things about Lincoln I don’t know. With our combined knowledge of Lincoln, we’ll make him the laughing stock of Canada together! Deal?”

“Deal,” Desi and Rico said in unison as they shook hands on it, then the three of them walked off as Clyde and the others watched them.

“Hey, Chandler, ever hear of subtlety?” Kara called out mockingly, but Chandler pretended not to hear.

“Something tells me there’s more to this than just going undercover at an expensive hotel,” Stella mused.

“Whatever they do, I hope they can help us get Lincoln back,” Clyde said worriedly. “I didn’t come this far to lose my best friend now!”

“I have a feeling Chandler’s gonna betray us when he gets the chance,” Liam guessed.

“Who cares about that?” Rusty asked them. “All I care about is getting paid back.”

“Me too,” Zach agreed.

He then began to follow Chandler, Desi, and Rico, and then Rusty, Liam, Clyde, Kara, and Stella followed behind.

Chapter Text

2 Days Until Christmas

In the hotel lounge, the Loud Family, Bernard Family, Green Family, Gwen’s family, Owen’s family, DJ and his momma, and all their friends were gathered for an announcement. Rita and Lynn Sr. walked up and stood in front of the crowd, Lynn Sr. carrying a Santa hat.

“Okay, everyone,” Rita began. “This year, we’re going to do a Secret Santa.”

“To anyone who hasn’t heard of a Secret Santa before, raise your hand,” Lynn Sr. said.

Ella, Jasmine, Max, Mike, and Zoey all rose their hands, Jasmine since she never experienced a Secret Santa in Australia before, the other four because they were either too young or their families had never done it.

“Well, a Secret Santa is a gift exchange tradition we do every year back in Royal Woods,” Rita explained to the five who didn’t know what it was.

“Ah,” Jasmine realized while Ella, Max, Mike, and Zoey nodded in understanding.

“Each participant puts their name in this hat,” Lynn Sr. further explained, holding up the Santa hat. “And then we randomly draw a person’s name, and that person becomes the Secret Santa for the person whose name they drew.”

“That person must then get the other person a gift,” Rita added. “But they must not give away their identities.”

“And finally, when it’s time to give that person their gift, they must try to guess who their Secret Santa is,” Lynn Sr. finished. “Only then can the giver reveal their name.”

“So come on up and get your names,” Rita told all the kids. “And don’t open them until you get back to your rooms.”

The teens and kids each walked up to the Loud parents and took a slip of paper out of the Santa hat, Lincoln being first and Lily being last. Once they had their slips, they took the elevator back up to their rooms, leaving the parents alone in the lounge.

“Hey, don’t we get to have some fun too?” Jacob asked.

“Yes, I’m curious to see what other American Christmas traditions you have,” Hope said in agreement.

“We’ve got more slips of paper if you want to do another Secret Santa,” Lynn Sr. offered, still holding the Santa hat. “It’ll be just for us.”

“No thank you,” Mr. Green politely declined, making Lynn Sr. slump a bit.

“It was worth a shot, honey,” Rita soothed, rubbing her husband’s back.

That cheered Lynn Sr. up a little.

In Lincoln, Lily, and Bridgette’s hotel room, they were sitting on their beds while holding their slips of paper.

“Okay, on three we open up our slips of papers and read them together,” Lincoln told them.

“Got it,” Bridgette nodded, then started counting down. “One, two…”

“Three!” Lily finished.

They unfolded their slips and read the recipients of the gifts they were going to give.

“Dawn,” Lincoln read, before he did a celebratory fist pump. “Yes!”

“Katie,” Bridgette read her slip, before shrugging. “Eh, it could be worse. At least it’s better than what Chris does to us.”

“Sadie,” Lily read, before she looked confused. “But I don’t know anything about Sadie!”

“Sure you do, Lily,” Lincoln argued. “You saw her when you were watching the first season. She and Katie are practically inseparable.”

“That’s what I need to figure out so I can give her a gift she likes,” Lily pointed out.

“Hey, I know of a mall that has a lot of stores,” Bridgette recalled. “Maybe they’ll have something you like there.”

“Then let’s go,” Lincoln said, grabbing his coat and putting it on.

Lily and Bridgette slipped on their coats and followed Lincoln out of the room.

One bus ride later, they arrived at a giant shopping mall in the suburbs of Toronto.

“Is this the place, Bridgette?” Lincoln asked.

“Yup,” Bridgette nodded. “It’s called the Galleria Mall. I’ve heard about it, but I’ve never actually been here.”

“It’s huge!” Lily exclaimed.

“Yeah, it has a total of 936 business, along with an adult club, an amusement park, and an ice skating rink,” Bridgette explained.

“Well, what are we waiting for?” Lily asked excitedly. “Let’s go inside!”

“Okay,” Lincoln nodded.

Inside the mall, Lily was in awe at its massive size and many stores.

“Wow!” She gasped.

“So, Lily, where should we start?” Bridgette asked.

“The amusement park!” Lily immediately answered. “No, wait, the ice rink! No, wait, the-”

“Lily, remember the reason why we’re here,” Lincoln reminded her.

“Oh, right,” Lily blushed. “Sorry.”

Bridgette walked over to a map of the mall. “Huh, the Penalty Box,” She said. “Maybe I should start there.”

“Ooh, can I come with you, Bridgette?” Lily asked, before turning to her brother. “Please, Linky, can I?”

“Of course,” Bridgette smiled. “If that’s all right with you, Lincoln.”

“Sure it is,” Lincoln replied.

“Yay!” Lily cheered, running over to Bridgette and hugging her legs.

Bridgette chuckled as she picked Lily up and put her on her shoulders.

“Okay, let’s meet back at the food court in, say, a couple hours and see what we have so far,” Lincoln said. “How does that sound?”

“Sounds good,” Bridgette replied as they walked off in separate directions, with Lincoln heading to the food court and Bridgette taking Lily to the Penalty Box.

Around the 181^st and 190^th floor, Bridgette and Lily found the Penalty Box, then Bridgette set Lily down and held her by the hand as they stepped inside.

“So, what are we looking for Bridgette?” Lily asked as they looked around.

“I don’t know, Lily,” Bridgette replied. “The only conversation I had with Katie was before the murder mystery challenge, so I hardly know her. Let’s just look around and see what we can find.”

“Okay,” Lily nodded.

“Stay close to me, okay?” Bridgette told Lily as she kept a tight grip on her hand.

“Yes, Bridgette,” Lily promised.

On the ground floor, Katie and Sadie were at a clothing store known as the Khaki Barn, searching the clothing racks for anything their recipients would like.

“Hey, Katie,” Sadie began.

“Yeah?” Katie asked, turning to her BFFFL.

“You ever get the feeling that in an alternate universe, we’re employees at the Khaki Barn managed by someone who acts a lot like Courtney?” Sadie asked.

“I guess,” Katie replied dismissively, as she was focused on finding the perfect gift for Bridgette. “So, any thoughts on what to get Lily yet?”

“No, I’m still stumped,” Sadie answered, picking up two pieces of clothing. “Is Lily’s favorite color lavender or lilac?”

“Just get her something that’s a shade of purple,” Katie suggested, before something caught her eye and she gasped. “That’s it!”

“What’s it?” Sadie asked.

“This jacket!” Katie exclaimed, picking it up. “So Bridgette stays warm during the winter!”

“If you think she’ll like it that much, then buy it,” Sadie told her.

As Katie walked over to the checkout counter, she stared wistfully at Sadie, who was back to trying to decide which piece of clothing Lily would like best, and let out a heavy sigh.

A few stores down, Gwen was at the record store Spin This. She knew Trent liked music, and while Luna was stuck with her boyfriend, she could settle for having the girlfriend of Lincoln’s rockstar sister as her Secret Santa, so here she was.

“Let’s see,” Gwen said as she perused the collections of music, before taking some of the records off the shelves, then put them back when she thought they weren’t satisfactory enough. “Too heavy metal, not rockin’ enough, not into little kids’ songs. I can’t believe the Moon Goats were a kiddie band that one time. Ugh! They don’t have anything here for Sam!”

She put the records back and went over to the next section, hoping to find a gift Sam would like.

Meanwhile, Desi and Rico were with Chandler and Lincoln’s friends in the Celebrity Manhunt studio. Chandler sat in one of the interview chairs, while Desi and Rico sat across from him.

“So you’re saying you’ve known Lincoln since you were kids?” Desi asked.

“Yeah, that’s right,” Chandler nodded. “I’ve known him since elementary school."

"When did you first meet?" Rico asked.

“When I was handing out invitations to my 11^th birthday party,” Chandler said nostalgically, remembering the event like it was yesterday. “We hung out at Gus’ Games and Grub and I asked him to do me some favors if he wanted an invitation, only for him to be a no-show on my special day! I mean, what kind of friend does that?!”

“Wow,” Rico let out. “You must have a serious beef with Lincoln.”

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” Chandler groaned out. “But it doesn’t stop there! On my second, technically first, week of middle school, he sicced a moose on me! I think it might be the moose his hippy girlfriend helped him catch in the animal challenge in Season 1.”

“All the way from Canada?” Desi asked, impressed.

“It could be, but you’ll never know until you find out,” Chandler shrugged.

“What else did he do to you?” Rico asked.

“Well let’s see…” Chandler thought, before he listed the times (he thought) Lincoln gave him grief. “On Christmas, he gave me a Rip Hardcore backpack with a jetpack feature in exchange for some earrings he needed. But the backpack malfunctioned and sent me flying into a tree!”

“Oof, that’s rough,” Desi cringed.

“But that’s nothing compared to the time I generously loaned some film equipment to him and the rest of the Action News Team in exchange for becoming a member,” Chandler mentioned. “And how did they repay me? By making me the laughing stock of the whole school!”

“Says he,” Stella snarked, as she and the rest of her friends except Kara knew the real reason why they did that.

“But wait, there’s more!” Chandler continued. “He launched me into a piranha tank, and Hank, our old class piranha, bit me in the ass!”

“Ouch,” Rico winced, though he was a bit thankful he was never the victim of a piranha attack.

“And when Flip’s Food & Fuel was having a millionth customer sale, I rigged the contest so I could be the winner,” Chandler went on. “And what did I get in return? A bag of expired chips, that’s what I got! Meanwhile, Lincoln Lame and McBride got their grubby little hands on practically every free snack in the store!”

“Though you did deserve it for being a brat,” Clyde muttered under his breath.

“And then, I tried to rightfully expose him as a fraud when he won our middle school’s film festival by daring him to do the stunt again, but a gust of wind miraculously allowed him to perform the stunt perfectly at the last second!” Chandler complained. “I mean, what is this, Tokyo Godfathers?!”

“I mean, if real life could save Hana and Kiyoko, then maybe it could to the same to Lincoln,” Rico reasoned, then saw Desi looking at him strangely. “What? I’m a fan of Satoshi Kon!”

“Whose side are you on anyway?!” Chandler asked angrily.

“I apologize on behalf of my colleague, Mr. McCann,” Desi said sincerely. “Is there anything else Lincoln did to you?”

“Well, there was this one Halloween where he tangled me up in a spider web!” Chandler brought up the last offense Lincoln did to him. “And all I did was rightfully blame him for getting us in trouble with those aliens.”

“Wait, aliens?” Rico asked, intrigued. “Those exist?”

“Oh, yeah,” Chandler confirmed.

“No way,” Desi shook her head in disbelief. “Aliens are real. This is gonna make one heck of a smear campaign against Lincoln!”

“So you think we should air this now?” Rico asked eagerly. “I think we can add in the part where Lincoln pushed us into Lake Ontario as an added bonus.”

“I’ve got a better idea,” Chandler suggested. “We can air it right on Christmas Eve, so everyone in Canada can see Lincoln for the naughty boy he really is."

Desi and Rico looked at each other, then back at Chandler.

"I like it," Desi grinned.

"Well, you know what they say, revenge is a dish best served cold," Rico smirked.

"Excellent," Chandler gave an evil grin. “Pleasure doing business with you.”

Desi and Rico stood up and walked off, while Chandler stood up and walked over to Lincoln’s friends.

“What did you do?” Kara demanded.

“Let’s just say I’ve got the perfect Christmas surprise for Lincoln,” Chandler explained casually. “A real big one too.”

He then walked off, leaving Clyde and the others alone.

“So…” Zach began. “Is anyone else having second thoughts about this?”

“Ah know ah am,” Liam said in guilt.

“So am I,” Clyde said shamefully.

“Me too,” Rusty agreed. “Though I would like it if Chandler would uphold his end of the deal and pay us back.”

“Really, Rusty?” Stella asked in disapproval. “We could be committing a major crime here, and all you’re worried about is money?!”

“So, I guess we’re gonna get that ‘I told you so’ from you and Kara now, huh?” Clyde guessed.

“Nuh-uh,” Stella shook her head.

“Is it because it’s not the right time for that?” Zach asked.

“Maybe,” Kara answered with uncertainty.

Clyde, Liam, Rusty, and Zach sighed.

Back at the Galleria Mall, Lincoln had been at every store, and he still couldn’t find the perfect gift to give to Dawn for her Secret Santa.

“What am I gonna do?” He asked himself.

“Come on, come all!” A salesperson called. “Come on down to Jonesy’s Junk! We’ve got the lowest prices in town! Everything for a buck or less!”

Hearing that made Lincoln perk up, and he walked over to the store, but to his dismay, Jonesy’s Junk was actually a small, rudimentary stall set up in the middle of the food court, managed by a 21-year-old Latin American Canadian man with messy dark blue hair and brown eyes. He wore a dark magenta shirt with red highlights on the sleeves and neck, blue jeans, and brown shoes. He also had a necklace around his neck and visible signs of facial hair on his chin. This was Jonesy Garcia, the proprietor of Jonesy’s Junk.

“You’re Jonesy?” Lincoln asked. “As in, the Jonesy from 6Teen?”

“Yeah, that’s right,” Jonesy nodded. “And you must be Lincoln Loud from Total Drama.”

“Oh, my God!” Lincoln exclaimed. “I can’t believe you still work here five years after your show ended!”

“Yeah, I got canned from basically every store at this mall,” Jonesy explained. “So I figured I’d start my own business instead.”

“So…” Lincoln began. “You got anything here for a Secret Santa?”

“I’m sorry, did you say a Secret Santa?” Jonesy asked Lincoln.

“Yeah, I need to get something for it,” Lincoln explained. “It’s for my girlfriend Dawn Bernard.”

“Your girlfriend, you say?” Jonesy inquired. “Well, for the first American who ever competed on the show, I think your special lady deserves something extra special.”

He rummaged through his junk and pulled out a pearl necklace, which caught Lincoln’s eye.

“That’s perfect!” Lincoln gasped. “How much?”

“50 bucks,” Jonesy revealed.

“What?” Lincoln asked. “No way! I’ll give you 20.”

“70,” Jonesy instead rose the price.

Groaning in frustration, Lincoln took out his wallet, took all the money out, threw it at Jonesy’s face, snatched the necklace, and walked off.

“Merry Christmas to you too, sir!” Jonesy called.

At the entrance to the mall, Bridgette and Lily, the former carrying the bags for their gifts to Katie and Sadie, had met up with Gwen, who had her own bag for her gift to Sam, and they were waiting for Lincoln to come join them so they could take the bus back to the hotel.

“Where is Lincoln?” Gwen asked. “I’ve been busting my butt trying to find the perfect gift for Sam, and I’m just dying to get back to the hotel and give it to her.”

“There he is,” Bridgette said as Lincoln came running over to them, also with his own bag for his gift to Dawn.

“Hey, guys,” Lincoln panted as he stopped. “I got my Secret Santa gift for Dawn.”

“And we got our gifts for Katie and Sadie!” Lily chirped.

“That’s nice, Lily,” Lincoln complimented. “How about you, Gwen?”

“I did the best I could, I guess,” Gwen sighed. “Really wish I could’ve gotten Lucy’s name.”

“I understand, Gwen, but having another person’s name is what makes the Secret Santa a challenge,” Lincoln assured. “Oh, look, the bus is here. Let’s go.”

They picked up their bags and walked out to the bus stop, with Katie and Sadie following not too far behind carrying their own bags.

Chapter Text

On the bus ride back to the hotel, Bridgette, Gwen, Katie, Lily, Lincoln, and Sadie watched another bus, carrying Leni, Lindsay, Beth, Luna, Trent, Luan, Duncan, Benny, Izzy, Owen, Lynn, Eva, Tyler, Sam, and Lucy, heading towards it as they were leaving.

“Guess the Galleria Mall must be really busy this time of year,” Lincoln commented. “Some of my sisters are on their way there.”

“And so are some of our friends,” Bridgette added.

Looking at Katie, Bridgette took a deep breath and spike. “So, Katie…” She began. “What’d you get for your Secret Santa this year?”

“Sorry, Bridgette, but I’m not supposed to reveal who my recipient is, and that includes my gift,” Katie told her. “Don’t you remember what Mr. and Mrs. Loud told us?”

“Right, sorry,” Bridgette said sheepishly.

“It’s like this every year,” Lincoln confided to Gwen.

“Yeah, I noticed,” Gwen whispered.

Sadie spoke up next. “So, Katie told me of this alternate universe paradox where we’re characters in another show when we were at the Khaki Barn,” She explained.

“And we work for someone who sounds and acts like Courtney,” Katie added.

“Really?” Lincoln, Bridgette, Gwen, and Lily asked in unison.

“Yep,” Sadie nodded. “And it’s not just limited to us or Courtney. You guys, too.”

“Huh. You know, I wouldn’t mind if I was a Star Wars fanatic who managed an electronics store in the mall,” Lincoln mused.

“Now that you mention it, being an employee at the Penalty Box doesn’t sound so bad,” Gwen admitted, before she frowned. “Unless it’s on Christmas Eve.”

“Same with being a part-time employee at a five-star resort in addition to being a surf instructor there,” Bridgette agreed. “Having a mean boss who sounds a lot like Mike can be a pain.”

“I’ve always wondered what it’s like to be a puppy,” Lily said excitedly. “A puppy who flies a helicopter and goes on rescue missions.”

“I know what you’re talking about, Lily,” Lincoln chuckled good-naturedly. “You’ve loved Paw Patrol since you were a baby.”

“And Skye was, and always will be, my favorite pup,” Lily declared cutely.

The conversation soon died down, though Bridgette did give Katie the occasional loving glance every now and then. However, she seemed more focused on Sadie than Bridgette.

“Nice going, Bridgette,” Gwen snarked.

“Hey, give me a break, Gwen,” Bridgette sighed. “I’m not good at this flirting thing, especially since I’m the one who’s experiencing these feelings.”

And the six of them continued to sit in silence as the bus made its way to its destination.

When they got back to the Grand Overlook, they saw their families and the rest of their friends already there.

“Okay, everybody got their gifts?” Lynn Sr. asked.

“Yeah!” All the Loud kids, plus the ex-Total Drama contestants said, holding them up.

“Great!” Rita smiled. “Now it’s time for you to put them under the tree, and we’ll open them tomorrow.”

“Yay!” Everyone cheered.

As Lincoln headed back to his room with Lily and Bridgette, a pair of hands grabbed him and pulled him into the janitor closet. When he turned around, he saw that it was none other than his girlfriend Dawn, who walked over to the door, shut it, and locked it.

“Why’d you bring me in here?” Lincoln asked.

“For some fun, of course,” Dawn replied playfully. “Since we got to this hotel, we’ve rarely had some alone time together.”

“You know, I like the sound of that,” Lincoln grinned.

Dawn took off her sweater, exposing her bra, while Lincoln took off his shirt and undershirt.

“Oh, I’ve missed these,” Lincoln drooled as he reached out to touch Dawn’s boobs.

“Same,” Dawn agreed as she pressed her head against Lincoln’s chest.

We cut to outside the janitor’s closet as Lincoln and Dawn started moaning erotically. After several minutes, they finally stepped out, covered in sweat, but extremely satisfied.

“Thanks for giving me my Secret Santa early, Dawn,” Lincoln sighed out happily.

“You’re welcome, Linky,” Dawn smiled as they walked off separately to their rooms.

Meanwhile, in Great Lakes City, the Casagrandes, Ronnie Anne, Maria, Arturo, Lori, Bobby, Leandro, and Lucita were about to head out to do some more villancicos. Bobby and Lori set their twins down on the saddles Carlota made for Lalo and strapped them in.

“Aw, just look at them!” Lori gushed. “Aren’t they cute?”

“They sure are,” Bobby agreed, before turning to Carlota. “Hey, thanks for making Leandro and Lucita’s first Las Posadas experience possible, cuz.”

“Of course, Bobby,” Carlota smiled. “Mi familia es tu familia.”

“Ronnie Anne?” Maria asked her daughter. “Are you ready?”

Ronnie Anne took a deep breath and gave her mother a smile. I’m ready,” She answered. Sid ending their friendship two days ago still stung, but like Maria said, she still had her family. “Let’s go.”

“All right!” Carl cheered. “Let’s go!”

He dashed out of the apartment, and the rest of the family followed him, Lalo, Lori, Bobby, Leandro, and Lucita lagging behind, because Lori and Bobby wanted to make sure their babies were okay.

A few minutes later, the Casagrandes and Santiagos were parading the streets, CJ, Carl, and Carlitos at the front so they could sing their Christmas song.

“Ring the bells, everyone!” CJ announced as he strummed his guitar. “It’s Las Posadas time!”

“All right!” Carlitos cheered as they began to sing.

Carl:

Hey, everybody, it’s that time of year

Time to dance and let out a cheer

Christmas sounds are everywhere

CJ, Carl, and Carlitos:

Ring the bells at Las Posadas time

Carl:

It’s time to dress in your winter clothes

Decorate the tree with mistletoe

Come on, Santa, let’s go, go, go

CJ, Carl, and Carlitos:

Ring the bells at Las Posadas time

Carl:

And we all sing

CJ:

Bing bong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong

CJ:

Bing bong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong

CJ:

Bing bong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong

Ring-a-ding-ding-a-ring-a-ding-dong

CJ:

Ring the bells at Las Posadas time

Lucita and Leandro babbled happily to the music, since they couldn’t speak yet. Ronnie Anne watched her niece and nephew with a smile.

“Well, at least it’s better than the Las Posadas Song Song,” She admitted.

“What’s the Las Posadas Song Song?” Carlota asked.

“I’ll tell you later,” Ronnie Anne promised.

Carl:

Smiling faces everywhere

People are happy without a care

Time to give and time to share

CJ, Carl, and Carlitos:

Ring the bells at Las Posadas time

Carl:

Hey, everybody, it’s that time of year

Time to dance and let out a cheer

Christmas sounds are everywhere

CJ, Carl, and Carlitos:

Ring the bells at Las Posadas time

Carl:

And we all sing

CJ:

Bing bong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong

CJ:

Bing bong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong

CJ:

Bing bong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong

Ring-a-ding-ding-a-ring-a-ding-dong

CJ:

Ring the bells at Las Posadas time

“One more time!” Carlitos shouted.

Carl:

And we all sing

CJ:

Bing bong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong

CJ:

Bing bong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong

CJ:

Bing bong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong

Ring-a-ding-ding-a-ring-a-ding-dong

CJ:

Ring-a-ding-ding-a-ring-a-ding-dong

Everyone:

Ring-a-ding-ding-a-ring-a-ding-dong

CJ, Carl, and Carlitos:

Ring the bells at Las Posadas time

“That was fun,” Carlitos sighed happily as they kept walking.

Later, the Casagrande-Santiago family returned from their villancicos outing. Bobby and Lori took their twins out of the saddles and held them in their arms, then Leandro and Lucita both let out a yawn, as they were getting sleepy.

“Okay, guys, we’re gonna go put Leandro and Lucita to bed,” Lori said, as she and Bobby walked over to Bobby’s old room. “Feel free to start dinner without us.”

“Okay, but we’ll be sure to save some food for you and Roberto, Lori!” Rosa called, then turned to her younger granddaughter. “What about you, Ronnita?”

“Thanks, Abuela, but I’m not hungry,” Ronnie Anne said sadly.

“What?!” Rosa exclaimed. “But you need to-” She stopped herself short after remembering Hope’s advice from Thanksgiving. “Okay, I won’t force you.”

Ronnie Anne took off her winter jacket and sadly trudged off to her room.

“What if she’s relapsing back into her depression?” Rosa asked worriedly.

“She’s not, Mom,” Maria assured. “She just needs time to process the fact that Sid is no longer her friend.”

“I hope that is the case,” Rosa prayed mentally.

In Ronnie Anne’s room, she lay face-down on her bed, crying into her pillow. Once she was done, she began to sing.

Ronnie Anne:

Never thought that I could

Sink so low without you

Everything I lost is not so good

Without you

And suddenly nothing feels quite right

Why does the sunshine feel like night?

I’m only pretending I’m all right

Without you

Now, what’s a cheeseburger without the cheese?

Or a pizza without the pepperoni?

That’s the way I feel when there’s just me

Without you

And I…

I, I…

Guess I miss you.

Meanwhile, upstairs in Apartment 3A, Sid laid on her bed as she stared at the ceiling, thinking the same thing.

Sid:

It doesn’t really matter how much I enjoy

Being without you

Oh, I can’t enjoy this Christmas Eve, Eve

When I’m without you

No one can make me smile like you

No one else can turn my 1 to 2

Maybe that’s why I’m feeling so blue

Without you

Now, tell me what’s the hot dog without the bun?

Tell me what’s a sunflower without the sun?

That’s the way I felt when I said we’re done

But now I…

I, I…

Guess I miss you.

The screen split into two as Ronnie Anne and Sid sang in their respective rooms while lying on their beds.

Ronnie Anne, Sid:

I, I, I…

Guess I miss you.

Sid:

Will you forgive me, my friend?

Ronnie Anne:

Come bring some sunshine back into my life again

Ronnie Anne, Sid:

‘Cause life’s no fun when you don’t come around

I, I, I…

Guess I miss you.

I…

I, I…

I guess I miss you.

The song ended as the screen merged back into one, this one showing Sid still moping on her bed. Becca stepped in to check on her older daughter, seeing a bunch of photos scattered all over the floor with Ronnie Anne’s face torn off or scribbled out

“Sid, were you singing?” She asked curiously. She then could have sworn she heard sobbing sounds coming from Sid. “And are you crying?”

“Leave me alone, Mom,” Sid moaned, pulling the covers over her head and turning on her side so she was facing away.

“Please, Sid,” Becca said softly, sitting down on the bed. “I want to help you.”

Reluctantly, Sid lowered the covers and sat up, though she avoided eye contact with her mother at first.

“I miss Ronnie Anne,” Sid said in a hoarse whisper.

Becca’s eyes widened, surprised that Sid’s behavior had improved in just 2 days. “Really?” She asked.

“Yeah,” Sid nodded. “When she came home, I was upset with her, mostly for her role in Bridgette and Geoff’s breakup. I became a bystander and let her get bullied, humiliated, and ostracized by our friends! What kind of best friend am I?!”

Sid couldn’t take the guilt anymore and started crying into her mother’s chest. Becca hugged her daughter back and patted her back.

“There, there,” She said as Sid cried and cried until she was completely out of tears. “Look, I can see you’re really sorry, but I hope you understand now that Ronnie Anne is clearly trying to change and make up for what she did.”

“I know that now, Mom,” Sid sniffed as she separated from her mother’s embrace. “Maybe asking her to get Bridgette and Geoff back together was a little much.”

“So you’re gonna forgive Ronnie Anne now?” Becca asked.

“Yes, Mom,” Sid nodded sincerely. “Consider it the first of a dozen amends I have to make with her. I just hope she forgives me too.”

“I’m sure Ronnie Anne will understand and be more than happy to make it up to you,” Becca assured gently. “But it’s kind of late, so why don’t we head down to see her tomorrow?”

“But I thought I was grounded, remember?” Sid pointed out.

“Well, consider yourself ungrounded,” Becca told her.

“Oh, my God, Mom!” Sid squealed happily, hugging her mom tight. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

“But I hope this has taught you a valuable lesson,” Becca said firmly. “Like being there for your friends when they need you the most, especially your best friends.”

“Trust me, Mom, it has,” Sid replied. “I’m not gonna make the same mistake again.”

“Good,” Becca nodded in satisfaction. “Now, go to sleep.”

Becca stepped out of the room as Sid slipped out of her pajamas and crawled into bed. She was going to give Ronnie Anne the sorry of all sorries, then she would welcome her back with open arms, and finally, they’d make up for the time they lost when they were “on a break.”

Sid smiled as she fell asleep, hopeful that things would gradually return to normal one she set things right with Ronnie Anne.

Christmas Eve

Lily was the first to wake up in the hotel room she shared with Bridgette and her brother. Lincoln followed suit, then Bridgette.

“Morning, Linky,” She yawned, then turned to Bridgette. “Good morning Bridgette.”

“Good morning, Lily,” Lincoln said. “And merry Christmas Eve, Bridgette.”

“You too, Lincoln and Lily,” Bridgette smiled.

Suddenly, the door burst open, and Dawn stepped into the room.

“Lincoln!” She said urgently. “Bridgette! Lily!”

“Dawn?” Lincoln asked. “What’s going on?”

“Just come over to my room, quick!” Dawn said urgently.

Lincoln, Bridgette, and Lily, still in their pajamas, got out of their beds and followed Dawn to the hotel room she and her parents were sleeping in.

Inside the Bernard family’s hotel room, the TV was turned on as Dawn, Hope, Jacob, Lincoln, Bridgette, and Lily watched.

“You think Lincoln Loud is one of the best Total Drama contestants of all time?” The TV announcer asked. “Well, these moments might as well prove you otherwise! And now, live from the Celebrity Manhunt studio, none other than Desi Wilhelm and Rico Contra, along with special guest Chandler McCann!”

The scene switched to the Celebrity Manhunt studio where Desi, Rico, and Chandler were standing, as Dawn, Lincoln, and Lily gasped.

“Chandler!” They exclaimed.

“Who?” Bridgette asked, as she didn’t know who Chandler was.

“Just watch and listen, Bridgette,” Lincoln told her solemnly.

“Yeah, that’s right!” Chandler practically bragged on international TV. “Lincoln Loud has been giving me nothing but trouble since the day I first met him.”

The TV now showed Lincoln and Chandler in class together in Mr. Bolhofner’s trailer, when suddenly, the moose Liam adopted from Canada, Ellie Mae, burst through the wall of the trailer and chased Chandler off, directly giving him his comeuppance for getting Lincoln in trouble with Mr. Bolhofner.

“Ever heard of bad people abuse animals?” The TV announcer asked, laughing. “More like bad people have animals abuse you!”

Lincoln was stunned at what he was seeing, before the screen then showed another memory with manipulated footage. Chandler was sitting arrogantly in Lincoln’s old seat after Mr. Bolhofner had let the latter keep his new one. Cleverly, Lincoln noticed a cord under his seat and pulled it, sending Chandler flying into the tank of Hank the Piranha, who then bit Chandler on the butt. The TV showed the outside of the trailer as Chandler screamed.

“And I’ve still got the bite marks to prove it!” Chandler stated, turning around and pulling down his pants to show where Hank had bitten him, though mercifully, Lincoln prevented Lily from seeing it by covering her eyes.

The TV showed more footage of Lincoln, except these were his worst moments so far on Total Drama, such as helping Dawn cheat in the brunch challenge in Island, hugging Bridgette the night of the bank heist challenge in Action with a jealous Geoff watching them, and him and Ronnie Anne pushing Desi and Rico into Lake Ontario on Thanksgiving.

“So if you’ve seen Lincoln Albert Loud, two-time Total Drama competitor, hand him over to the proper authorities,” Desi advised.

“Yeah!” Rico shouted in agreement. “He’s nothing but a bully, a cheater, a two-timer, and has a complete disrespect for poor, innocent, helpless reporters like Desi and me!”

“And now back to our regularly scheduled programming,” The TV announcer said as Dawn turned off the TV.

“I can’t believe it,” Lincoln muttered. “Chandler turned all of Canada against me!”

“And that video he, Desi, and Rico posted is trending rapidly,” Dawn added, pulling out her phone.

“Boy, Lincoln, looks like this Chandler really has it out for you,” Bridgette commented.

“Hey, I didn’t do anything to him, Bridgette!” Lincoln argued. “He brought everything you saw in those videos upon himself, and he knows it, but somehow he’s altered the footage and painted me as the bad guy! I just don’t know how he did it.”

Something suddenly clicked in Dawn and Lincoln’s minds.

“Desi and Rico!” They exclaimed.

Before Bridgette could ask something, the door suddenly opened, and a bellboy stepped in.

“Lincoln Loud and Dawn Bernard?” The bellboy asked. “I’ve been asked to take you down to the lobby where the rest of your friends are.”

“But we’re not even dressed yet!” Lincoln protested.

“This is not a matter of debate!” The bellboy said firmly. “Get down to the lobby now!”

The Bernards, Lincoln, Lily, and Bridgette followed the bellboy out of the room.

When Lincoln, Dawn, Bridgette, Lily, Hope, and Jacob got down to the lobby, they saw Lincoln and Lily’s family, Duncan’s family, Gwen’s family, Owen’s family, Leshaniqua, DJ’s Momma, and all their friends, still in their pajamas, being detained by the local authorities.

“Get your hands off me!” Jasmine yelled, pulling some cops off of her like a pro wrestler. “Don’t you know how I am?!”

Suddenly, she was shot in the butt by a tranquilizer dart, and behind her stood two police officers, one skinny and African-Canadian, the other obese with brown hair tied in a ponytail at the back. Their names were Sanders and MacArthur, police cadets in training.

“MacArthur…” Sanders said disapprovingly. “What kind of tranquilizer did you use?”

“Nothing too lethal,” MacArthur assured. “Just the elephant tranquilizer.” Sanders’ glare hardened. “What? You’ve seen Jasmine on the show!”

“Hey!” Lincoln’s voice shouted. “Those are our friends!”

“Let them go!” Dawn ordered.

They, Bridgette, and Lily ran down the steps, only to be apprehended by the police themselves. Chandler, Desi, and Rico then stepped in, with Clyde and Lincoln’s friends trailing behind.

“You!” Lincoln exclaimed.

“Well, well, well,” Desi said. “Look at this rowdy bunch we’ve got.”

“But how did you find us?” Lincoln asked. “And how did you know which hotel we were staying at?”

“Your friends tipped us off after going undercover as the hotel staff,” Rico explained. “Though, I think it would be best if we let Chandler do the explaining for us.”

Desi and Rico stepped back as Chandler smugly stepped forward. “That’s right, Lincoln Lame,” He gloated. “I stole your oldest sister’s ticket, brought your friends scalped tickets so we could follow you hear, went undercover at this glamorous hotel to find any dirt we could get on you, and shared all those times you humiliated me with those reporters so we could slam your reputation in Canada.”

“What?!” Lincoln exclaimed in shock. He then turned to his friends, who had looks of shame plastered on their faces. “Guys, please tell me that’s not true!”

Clyde, Liam, Rusty, Zach, Stella, and Kara didn’t say anything, too ashamed to even look Lincoln in the eye.

“Guys!” Lincoln snapped, getting agitated. “Tell me the truth!”

Clyde couldn’t take the guilt anymore. “All right!” He yelled. “It’s true! But you have to believe me when I say we only did it because I was afraid of losing you!”

“By trusting Chandler, of all people?!” Lincoln asked furiously. “You know he can’t be trusted!”

“It was a dumb move, believe us,” Rusty admitted. “But you also have to believe us when we said we didn’t mean it!”

“Lincoln, please!” Clyde begged. “Just here me out! You’re my best friend!"

"Yeah, I was,” Lincoln said bitterly, echoing what Sid said to Ronnie Anne the night they “broke up.”

Clyde felt like his heart was being ripped out, chewed up by Lincoln, spat out, and thrown down a sewer at those words. Lincoln then turned back to Chandler.

“So, Chandler, what are you thinking on doing to me?” He asked.

“Hmm. I’m thinking humiliation,” Chandler answered. “You made me lose my popularity, so I’m gonna make you lose yours. That’s the way it works.”

“But what’s gonna happen to our children?” Lynn Sr. asked worriedly.

“What’s gonna happen to Lily?” Rita cried.

“And the rest of my sisters, and my friends!” Lincoln added.

“And their families, and our pets?!” Dawn finished.

“Don’t worry, hippy,” Chandler assured mockingly as Edward and Maple were taken by animal control and put into cages, with Hope trying and failing to hold on to her family’s beloved raccoon. “Your pets will be taken to the animal shelter to be ‘taken care of.’”

“No!” Dawn and Lincoln screamed in unison.

“And as for you, your families, and your friends…” Desi continued. “You’ll be split up until the Canadian government decides what to properly do with you.”

“You’ve been a naughty boy this year, Lincoln,” Rico taunted. “You’re just getting what you deserve.”

“So this is what it’s come to, huh, Chandler?” Lincoln asked. “Petty revenge? Now you’re being just like Ronnie Anne!”

“I am not like Santiago!” Chandler argued. “I’m just better, and now that I was able to do what she couldn’t, I always will be. Now, take them away!”

Sanders, MacArthur, and the rest of the cops led the Louds, Bernards, Duncan’s family, Gwen’s family, Owen’s family, Leshawna’s family, DJ’s family, and all of their friends out of the hotel as Chandler, Clyde, Liam, Rusty, Zach, Stella, Kara, Desi, and Rico watched.

“Okay, Chandler, we’ve upheld our end of the deal,” Zach told Chandler.

“Yeah!” Rusty added. “So now it’s time for you to pay us back!”

“Sorry, but I can’t do that,” Chandler said casually. “I just asked for the $6,000 so I could pay off my own expenses for the trip.”

“You snake!” Stella snarled.

“Thank you,” Chandler smiled. “Pleasure doing business with all six of you. Now you know how it feels when you’ve lost everything, including your best friend.”

Chandler walked off with Desi and Rico, while the ex-friends of Lincoln Loud looked at each other.

“Okay, we’ll bite,” Liam sighed. “If we had just trusted Lincoln in the first place, none of us would be in this situation right now.”

“Forget about that, Liam,” Kara said softly. “None of that matters now. We were all worried about losing Lincoln.”

“And now, because of what we’ve done, we’re never gonna see Lincoln again!” Clyde cried worriedly.

He collapsed to the floor on his knees and started crying into his hands in despair as his friends comforted him, acknowledging that it was because of their inability to trust Lincoln that they were in this mess to begin with.

Chapter Text

In Nassau, Bahamas, Chris McLean and Chef Hatchet were at one of those resorts that had a swim-up bar pool. Chef was having a Bahama Mama cocktail while Chris was having a Goombay Smash. The two sat at the bar as they clinked their drinks, before drinking them.

“Ahh. This is the life, isn’t it, Chef?” Chris asked happily. “No contestants to torture, no producers breathing down our necks. Just us two guys doing guy things.”

“You said it,” Chef agreed just as happily. “I’m so glad Lily helped us sort out our problems. And now look at us. Our relationship is healthier, I’m studying to get my pilot’s license, I got a raise, and we’re having the time of our lives while the teens suffer through winter. Merry Christmas, Chris.”

“Happy Hanukkah to you too, Chef,” Chris returned the sentiment.

But the happy times weren’t to last, as they saw the TV over the pool playing an emergency broadcast from Canada.

“And just earlier today, in Toronto, 16-year-old Lincoln Albert Loud, two-time Total Drama competitor, was tried and is awaiting punishment from the Canadian government,” The TV announcer said.

Hearing that, Chris spat out his drink in shock. “What?!” He shouted.

“His crimes include, but are not limited to, declining to have syrup on his pancakes four years ago, stealing a moose and attacking a fellow student at his American middle school with it, harassing and assaulting said student with a piranha, and worst of all, cheating, stealing another guy’s girlfriend, and assaulting two reporters, Desi Wilhelm and Rico Contra of Celebrity Manhunt, all on reality television,” The announcer listed Lincoln’s transgressions. “All information and proof provided by American high school student Chandler McCann.”

“No way,” Chef shook his head. “That can’t be. I thought we already hashed that out with the producers. And who’s this Chandler McCann fellow?”

“Does it matter?!” Chris asked, panicked. “We gotta go back to Canada and exonerate Lincoln! This Chandler is ruining one of my best contestants!”

“And you’re ruining my vacation, so that makes us even,” Chef argued, not happy about having his vacation time get cut short.

“Dude, I want a third season,” Chris declared. “If Chandler messes this up, and word of this gets out, we could get cancelled! Do you understand?!”

“Can we at least dry off first?” Chef asked.

Chris deadpanned. “Yeah, sure, whatever,” He said as they got out of the pool.

In Great Lakes City, the Casagrandes, Maria, Arturo, Ronnie Anne, Bobby, and Lori were also watching the news of Lincoln’s arrest. Currently, a TV news reporter was interviewing Chandler, Desi, and Rico.

“Mr. McCann, Ms. Wilhelm, and Senor Costa, are you certain that everything that you broadcasted about Lincoln loud was true?” The reporter asked the trio.

“You heard what you said,” Rico asserted. “More importantly, the people heard what we said.”

“The tape never lies,” Desi added. “And neither do we.”

She and Rico then fist-bumped.

Ronnie Anne, or anyone else in her family for that matter, couldn’t believe what they were hearing, while Lori’s mouth dropped open in shock.

“After what Lincoln Lame did to me throughout middle school and high school, he deserves it,” Chandler declared. “I wouldn’t be surprised if the Canadian government bans him from the country for life. Which means no more moose chasing me and no more upstaging me on that reality show of his.”

“And there you have it,” The reporter said, turning back to the camera. “Lincoln Loud’s fate will be decided by tonight. And now back to our regularly scheduled programming.”

“This can’t be happening!” Ronnie Anne exclaimed in shock.

“I know, but there’s nothing we can do, Ronnie Anne,” Lori sighed.

Suddenly, Ronnie Anne came up with an idea. “Wait, maybe there is!” She said.

She ran over to grab her winter jacket and put it on her.

“Ronalda, what are you doing?” Rosa demanded.

“Someone’s gotta go to Canada and help Lincoln,” Ronnie Anne explained. “And that someone’s gonna be me! I know Chandler better than anyone.”

“You can’t leave!” Maria protested. “Tonight’s the last night of Las Posadas!”

“Well, it’s something I’m gonna have to miss,” Ronnie Anne argued. “To help a friend.”

The Casagrandes, Maria, Lori, and Bobby were touched and surprised. Even Hector woke up to address his granddaughter.

“You still consider Lincoln a friend, despite this whole mess starting because you broke a pact you made?” Hector asked.

“Yes, Abuelo, I do,” Ronnie Anne nodded.

“Well, I’m coming with you,” Lori said, walking over to Ronnie Anne. “He’s my brother too.”

“Wait, we’re all going?” Bobby asked. “But what about Leandro and Lucita?”

“Simple. We take them with us,” Ronnie Anne answered.

Bobby laughed thinking it was a joke, while Lori and Ronnie Anne glared seriously at him. “Oh, wait, you’re serious,” He realized. “Let me laugh even harder.” He then proceeded to do just that. “You can’t be serious, Nie-Nie!”

“I am serious,” Ronnie Anne asserted. “I don’t want my family to have the burden of looking after the twins, and I definitely don’t want Leandro and Lucita to be away from their mommy and daddy.”

“Well, if we want to leave to catch the earliest flight, I’ll get a diaper bag ready right away,” Lori said as she walked off.

“Make that two of them!” Bobby added as he followed his wife.

At the Great Lakes City airport, Ronnie Anne, Lori, Lucita, Bobby, and Leandro ran over to the Air Canada counter.

“Excuse us, Ms. Airport clerk!” Ronnie Anne shouted once they stopped in front of the counter.

“Uh-huh,” The clerk replied dismissively.

“You have to put us onto the next flight to Toronto straight away!” Ronnie Anne explained frantically.

“Oh, do I now?” The clerk asked.

“Please!” Ronnie Anne pleaded. “I’m trying to get to someone! Someone who needs my help!”

“That’s some distance to go for some help,” The clerk chuckled. “Must be a good friend.”

“Yeah, he was,” Ronnie Anne sighed.

On the plane, Ronnie Anne looked out the window sadly, while Lori and Bobby sat in front of her with their twins in their laps. She sighed as two hallucinations of Lincoln and Sid appeared on either side of her, and she began to sing.

Ronnie Anne:

Sometimes you make a friend

The kind of friend who stays

Sometimes you make a friend

And you’re the one who goes away

Sometimes you’re the one…

Who acts a bit unkind

You didn’t think

And you did something

You can’t forget and can’t rewind

I’m sorry, so sorry

And I don’t know what to do

With you so far away

I’m sorry, so sorry

And as soon as I see you

That’s exactly what I’m going to say

I’m sorry

I hope you’re still my friend

I’m sorry

So sorry, my friend!

The hallucinations disappeared as the plane took off.

Upon arriving in Toronto, Lori, Lucita, Ronnie Anne, Bobby, and Leandro each took a taxi into the city, Ronnie Anne being in the one at the back.

Ronnie Anne:

Sometimes you make a friend

The kind of friend you need

You try to make them happy

But you don’t always succeed

Sometimes you’re the one

Who does something that’s not okay

Sometimes you hurt a friend

And you don’t know what to do or say

I’m sorry, so sorry…

She wiped the tears from her eyes as the taxis kept driving.

Once they got to the Grand Overlook, they got out of the taxis and saw Clyde, Stella, Rusty, Liam, Zach, and Kara standing miserably outside the hotel. Clyde stopped moping and instantly frowned as Ronnie Anne approached them.

“Well, well, well,” He said condescendingly. “If it isn’t Santiago.”

“Cut the speeches, McBride,” Ronnie Anne said. “I already got enough of that from my ex-best friend.”

“Yeah, me too,” Clyde sighed.

“You got dumped too, huh?” Ronnie Anne guessed.

“Yeah,” Clyde nodded. “All because we, and mainly I, trusted Chandler over him.”

Ronnie Anne gasped. “You should never trust Chandler McCann!” She exclaimed.

“Yeah, I got that now,” Clyde groaned.

Lori, fearing the wrath of Lincoln’s friends, took a deep breath and stepped forward.

“Let’s just cut to the chase, guys,” She said. “Where did they take Lincoln?”

“We’ll never talk,” Zach said firmly. “Never!”

Determined to prove that motherhood hadn’t made her soft, and despite having Lucita on a baby carrier, Lori grabbed Zach by his jacket and lifted him up.

“Tell me where my brother is, you four-eyed rodent, or I’ll literally turn you into a human pretzel!” She threatened.

“Okay, I’ll talk!” Zach cracked. “The Canadian Mounties took him, your parents, your sisters, his girlfriend, her parents, and all their friends and their families to the Toronto Police Headquarters!”

Satisfied, Lori released Zach, who fell to the ground on his butt, and then Liam and Stella helped him up.

“Nice work, Zach,” Kara snarked.

“Take me there now!” Lori ordered.

Zach nodded fearfully as he and Clyde lead the others in the direction of the Toronto Police Headquarters.

Back in Great Lakes City, Sid had finally mustered up her courage to talk to Ronnie Anne, unaware that she had already left. She dashed down the stairs, reached Apartment 2A, and knocked on the door.

“Come in!” Maria’s voice called. “It’s unlocked!”

Sid opened the door and stepped inside.

“Oh, Sid,” Maria said, walking over. “What a nice surprise.”

“Hola, Mrs. Santiago,” Sid greeted. “I came to apologize to Ronnie Anne. Is she around?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Sid,” Maria apologized. “But Ronnie Anne went with Lori and Bobby to Canada. Something about saving Lincoln from being prosecuted.”

“And she’s missing the last night of Las Posadas, too!” Rosa grumbled as she vacuumed the floor.

“What?!” Sid asked in shock. “No, she can’t be gone! Not now! I have to follow her!”

She ran down the stairs leading out of the complex, but then ran back up them to herapartment.

“Note to self: always tell your mom you’re going to another country before you leave,” She said to herself.

Maria shook her head, unamused, then shut the door.

Once Sid was given permission by her mother to go to Canada to apologize to Ronnie Anne, her father, Stanley, who was a conductor for the Great Lakes Area Rapid Transit (or GLART for short) system, gave her a lift on the subway to the airport. Once the train reached the airport station, Sid bolted out of the front car, as Stanley had allowed her to ride up in front with him.

“Thanks for the lift, Dad!” Sid called as she ran for the terminal.

“You’re welcome, honey!” Stanley called back.

However, when Sid got to the counter, to her dismay, there were no more flights available.

“I’m sorry,” The ticket agent apologized. “There are no more flights leaving today.”

“No more flights today?” Sid repeated, unable to accept that.

“I’m very sorry, but it is Christmas Eve,” The ticket agent explained.

Sid sighed as she rested her head on the counter.

“Is there anything else I can do for you?” The ticket agent asked.

“As a matter of fact, there is,” Sid answered, putting her head up hopefully. “What about another airline?”

“Let me check,” The ticket agent said.

He typed something on the computer.

“Nothing else available,” He replied. “Can’t we just reserve you a spot on the earliest flight for tomorrow? We’ll even give you a ticket for it.”

“Tomorrow? No, that’s way too late,” Sid argued. “I can’t wait that long.”

“Um, excuse me?” An elderly woman behind Sid asked. “You’re kind of holding up the line.”

“I don’t care!” Sid snapped, rounding angrily on her, then turned back to the ticket agent. “Listen, buddy, I am trying to patch up a friendship that I had a hand in breaking up, and you’re telling me that it’s impossible to get a flight to Toronto today?”

“I’m sorry,” The ticket agent said.

“No, no, no, no, I don’t want your sorry!” Sid shook her head. “This is Christmas! The season of perpetual hope! I don’t care if I have to run out onto your runway and hitchhike! If it costs me everything I own…if I have to sell my soul to the devil himself…I am going to get to Canada and say I’m sorry to my best friend!”

The ticket agent was moved by Sid’s plea, but like he said before, there were no other flights available.

“Ma’am, if there was anything else I can do…” He began.

A man with black slicked hair and a black denim jacket overheard Sid arguing with the ticket agent and made his way over to them.

“Hey, man, can you give us a second?” He asked, then whispered to Sid. “Just come with me.”

He led Sid over to the side.

“I couldn’t help but overhear you have a little bit of a dilemma,” The man told Sid.

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” Sid groaned. “Who are you anyway?”

“I’m Russ Pendanski,” The man said, introducing himself. “I take it you never heard of me before?”

Sid shook her head.

“They call me ‘The Oom-pah King of the Midwest,’” Russ explained. “The Ohio Oom-pah Band?”

He gestured over to a band of Oom-pah players, and one of them waved at Sid.

“Still not ringing any bells,” Sid replied.

“Moving on,” Russ said. “So, the word on the street is that you’re looking for a way to get to Toronto, am I right?”

“Yeah,” Sid confirmed. “My best friend, she just left there a couple of hours ago, and there are no more flights available…”

“Well, we can take you if you’d like,” Russ offered.

“Really?” Sid asked, surprised.

“Of course,” Russ smiled. “We were on our way to Montreal in a moving truck we rented, and Toronto just happens to be on the way there.”

“Oh, yes, please,” Sid said graciously. “Thank you.”

“You don’t mind traveling with a bunch of Oom-pah bums?” Russ asked.

“No, I’d love to,” Sid replied. “Thanks. Thanks!”

She walked over with Russ to the rest of the band.

A few minutes later, the Ohio Oom-pah Band’s moving van raced out of the airport and onto the highway, heading towards Canada. Sid was standing on top of the roof, and she began to sing.

Sid:

So I’ll hold on to hope

I’ll hold on tight

For a chance to make things right

I’m looking for you, I’ll come through

If it takes me all my life

I’m sorry, so sorry

And I don’t know what to do

With you so far away

I’m sorry, so sorry

And as soon as I see you

That’s exactly what I’m going to say

I’m sorry

I hope we can still be friends

I’m sorry

So sorry, my friend!

“Hey, get down from there!” The driver yelled.

Sid obeyed and climbed back down into the trailer.

“Couldn’t contain yourself, huh?” Russ guessed.

“Yeah, sorry, got a little excited,” Sid explained. “So, how long until we get to Toronto?”

“I’d say about another 8 hours, give or take,” Russ replied.

“8 hours?!” Sid shrieked. “Maybe I should’ve waited for that flight tomorrow after all.”

The rest of the band laughed as the moving van continued to make its way to its destination.

At the Toronto Police Headquarters, Lincoln, Dawn, Bridgette, DJ, Harold, Gwen, and Duncan were sitting next to each other in the interrogation room, each of them wearing orange prison jumpsuits and handcuffs on their wrists.

“Who was that guy, Lincoln?” Bridgette asked.

“His name’s Chandler McCann,” Lincoln explained. “I’m ashamed to admit it, but he and I have known each other since elementary school.”

“Whoa, you guys go back that far?” DJ asked.

Lincoln nodded. “It all started at his 11^th birthday party,” He told them. “I was desperate for an invitation, so I took him to Gus’ Games and Grub and did him these favors, but in doing so, I got Lori, who was working there at the time, in hot water with her boss, and…” The guilt was too great for Lincoln to handle, he trailed off.

“Lori had to work an extra shift to cover the cost of the freebies she gave Lincoln, which almost caused her to miss her dance,” Dawn continued explaining for her boyfriend. “But Lincoln was able to make it up to her by taking the shift in her steed.”

“When you were only 11?” Harold questioned. “Dude, you must’ve had your own mad skills your whole life.”

“That’s putting it mildly,” Lincoln smiled slightly, but then sighed again. “I just don’t know what happened to him. We started becoming friends after he dared me to go into the Royal Woods House of Terror, but then in middle school, he went back to his old ways, and now it seems he just keeps getting worse every year.”

“I don’t know who’s worse, him or Ronnie Anne,” Duncan gave his opinion of Chandler. “No, actually, Chandler’s much worse than Ronnie Anne.”

“Can’t argue with that,” Gwen agreed. “Obviously, he’s never heard of subtlety, and he’s far more pettier than Heather or Ronnie Anne ever were.”

“Sometimes, I wish Ronnie Anne was here,” Lincoln sighed. “Back when we were at the same school, she defended me from Chandler.”

“She did?” Bridgette, DJ, Duncan, Gwen, and Harold asked in unison. Dawn didn’t say anything as she already knew.

“Yeah,” Lincoln nodded. “She’d defuse all his pranks against me, humiliate him, and even hit him.”

“That sounds familiar,” Duncan mumbled, now feeling guilty for how he treated Harold back on the island, and now understanding why Lincoln interfered with his pranks. “I kinda feel sorry for the sucker. He clearly doesn’t understand the difference between right and wrong.”

“What disgusts me is that Lincoln’s friends from home could actually trust that jerk wad in the first place!" Harold growled.

“Easy, Harold,” Lincoln calmed down his Canadian best friend. “I’ll admit, I’m still very disappointed in Clyde and the others for trusting my archenemy, and their actions may seem a little misguided, but they were just looking out for me.”

“Again, he’s right,” Dawn agreed with her boyfriend. “They were so afraid of losing their friend to us, but they were so blinded by fear and paranoia they forgot to talk things out.”

“See, that’s a major problem I have with my sisters!” Lincoln pointed out. “We rarely, if ever, talk our problems out.”

“Lincoln,” Dawn said softly, snuggling against her boyfriend’s shoulder, though the cuffs limited their physical interaction. “No matter what happens, don’t ever think we’re going to replace your friends from home.”

“Really?” Lincoln asked.

“Of course,” Dawn smiled. “You’re the best boyfriend I could ever ask for.”

“And might I add that you’re also a true friend who’s there for others,” Harold spoke up. “Like me.”

“And me,” Bridgette added.

“And me,” DJ added.

“And me,” Gwen finished.

“Eh, you’re pretty okay with me, Snowball,” Duncan admitted.

“Now that I think about it, maybe I should’ve talked things out with my friends from America more,” Lincoln thought out loud. “So in the long run, this is kind of my fault as well.”

“We’ll worry about that later,” Gwen said. “Right now, we gotta focus on getting out of here and exposing Chandler for the lying fraud he is.”

“Oh, don’t worry, I’m sure Courtney is hashing things out with my parole officer, and by extension, all of our parole officers, right now,” Duncan assured.

“And how can you be so sure of that?” Harold asked skeptically.

“Dude, my girl’s studying to be a lawyer,” Duncan stated proudly. “I’m sure she’s doing fine.”

However, Courtney was unsuccessfully trying to bargain with Sanders and MacArthur for her and her friends’ release.

“Look, what if you let us go in exchange for 300 hours of community service to be completed by New Year’s Eve?” Courtney proposed.

“300 hours by New Year’s Eve?” MacArthur scoffed. “Nice try, but even I know that’s gonna take you even longer.”

“Look, I’m studying to be a CIT!” Courtney stressed for the umpteenth time. “Do you know what that stands for?!”

“Counselor-in-Training?” Sanders replied.

“Stay out of this!” Courtney and MacArthur snapped at her in unison.

Sanders had a sheepish look on her face as she lowered her head and raised her shoulders.

“Look, whatever this Chandler is telling you is a lie!” Courtney argued. “I’ve known Lincoln since the boot camp challenge, and I know he would never do all those things!”

“I know Lincoln, too,” Ronnie Anne spoke up. “But you don’t know Chandler as much as I do.”

Courtney, Sanders, and MacArthur looked in surprise to see Ronnie Anne, Lori, Lucita, Bobby, Leandro, Clyde, Zach, Liam, Rusty, Kara, and Stella entering the room. But what pierced Ronnie Anne’s soul was the disapproving look Courtney was sending her.

“Okay, I know a got a lot of nerve showing up here…” Ronnie Anne began. “But I have a plan on how we can save Lincoln’s reputation in Canada.”

“Just take me to my brother, please!” Lori begged. “Let me speak with him!”

“No, I will not!” MacArthur immediately refused Lori’s request.

At that, Ronnie Anne grabbed MacArthur by her vest and pulled her close.

“You’d better do what Lori says,” She warned. “Or else.”

“Or else what?” MacArthur scoffed.

Ronnie Anne pulled MacArthur up to her face and gave her a look that could kill. All MacArthur could see were swirls of ghosts in Ronnie Anne’s eyes. Not wanting to incur Ronnie Anne’s wrath, MacArthur relented as Ronnie Anne released her and led them to the interrogation room where Lincoln was being held. Before she could go any further, Sanders stopped her.

“Now, wait a minute!” Sanders told her partner. “We can’t just let them carry babies around the police station!”

“Oops, my bad,” Bobby said sheepishly, then handed his son off to MacArthur. “You wouldn’t mind watching our twins for us while we sort this out, do you?”

Lori shrugged as she gave her daughter to Sanders.

“But-but I don’t know anything about babies!” MacArthur protested.

“Sorry, they’re your problem now, not ours!” Ronnie Anne called out to them as she, Bobby, and Lori ran off with Courtney.

After they were gone, Leandro and Lucita started crying. Sanders and MacArthur looked at the babies and then each other, unsure of what to do with them.

In the interrogation room, Lincoln and his friends were sitting miserably, when Lori tapped on the window to get their attention.

“Lori?” Lincoln asked, surprised to see his eldest sister.

“Hang on, Lincoln!” Lori assured frantically. “Ronnie Anne’s gonna get you guys out of here.”

The door opened, and Ronnie Anne stepped in, having used a paperclip as a lockpick to unlock it. She then walked over to Lincoln and used the paperclip on his handcuffs, freeing him, before doing the same to the others.

“I saw everything, Lincoln,” Ronnie Anne explained. “You’re practically on every channel. I think you and I both know what we need to do.”

“Yep,” Lincoln nodded without hesitation. “Chandler needs to go down.”

They looked at the others, Ronnie Anne more hopefully, who gave Ronnie Anne skeptical looks (except Dawn), with Bridgette looking the most hesitant.

“Guys?” Lincoln asked. “Are you in?”

Bridgette, DJ, Duncan, Gwen, and Harold didn’t say anything.

“Come on, this is no time to hesitate!” Lincoln said desperately. “However you’re feeling about Ronnie Anne right now, we’re just going to have to trust her this one time.”

Still, silence. Finally, Dawn stepped forward and joined Lincoln and Ronnie Anne.

“I’m afraid Lincoln is right,” She said in her boyfriend’s defense. “Besides Lincoln, Ronnie Anne is the only other one who knows who Chandler is and what he’s capable of.”

“How do you know?” Duncan asked. “Did you read his aura too?”

“No, Courtney was already told everything by Ronnie Anne,” Dawn revealed. “As for Chandler’s aura, however, it’s far more twisted and evil than Ronnie Anne’s ever was.” She then turned to Ronnie Anne. “No offense.”

Ronnie Anne raised an eyebrow in annoyance.

“Look, the point is, we have a common enemy now,” Lincoln explained. “I’ve seen it for myself that Ronnie Anne really has changed, and you’re not gonna give her the chance to prove it?”

“But Lincoln-” Bridgette began.

“No, no ‘buts!’” Lincoln interrupted. “We don’t have to forgive her right away. We just need her long enough to depose Chandler from his position.”

Once more, Lincoln’s friends didn’t say anything. At last, Bridgette sighed.

“Okay, we’ll do it,” She said. “But I still can’t forgive you for what you did to me.”

“Make that all of us,” Duncan added, speaking for everyone else.

“I completely understand,” Ronnie Anne nodded in understanding.

“Thank you,” Gwen nodded back.

“Well, come on, guys!” Lincoln said. “Let’s give that Chandler an old-school fixing!”

“Shouldn’t we get the others first?” DJ asked.

“Oh, of course,” Lincoln replied, but then looked at himself. “But not like this.”

“I was afraid you’d say that,” Ronnie Anne said, bringing out Lincoln’s usual clothes. “So I took the liberty of salvaging these and bringing them to you.”

Lincoln eagerly took the clothes and went to find somewhere to get changed.

Chapter Text

After changing back into their regular clothes, Lincoln had gathered everyone in the briefing room to discuss their plan to take Chandler down.

“Okay, so we all want to get into the Celebrity Manhunt studio and expose the truth of Chandler’s lies to all of Canada, right?” Lincoln reminded them.

Everyone nodded.

“And we know that the studio is heavily fortified and no one ever gets in or out alive, right?” Lincoln asked.

Everyone nodded again.

“Well this time, I have a foolproof plan,” Lincoln explained. “I call it Operation Sneak Into the Celebrity Manhunt Studio and Expose Chandler and Restore My Reputation in Canada and Also Think of a Shorter Name for This Operation.”

Everyone except Dawn, Clyde, Liam, Rusty, Zach, Stella, Kara, Ronnie Anne, and Lincoln’s sisters gave him flat stares.

“Yeah, I know,” Lincoln acknowledged. “I gotta work on the name.”

“Can we just get to the plan already?” Duncan asked impatiently.

“Patience, Duncan!” Lincoln lightly chided him. “It was kind of hard for me to come up with a plan in less than an hour, so cut me some slack, will you?”

Duncan immediately went silent as Lincoln went back to explaining his plan.

“Chandler thinks he can weaken us by exploiting our faults and misdeeds, but we’re gonna do something even better,” Lincoln said. “We’re gonna weaken him using numbers and reason.”

“Violence, eh?” Eva grinned as she and Lynn cracked their knuckles. “I like that plan.”

“No, Eva, no violence!” Lincoln shot down, before sending his sporty sister a glare. “That goes for you too, Lynn.”

“Aw, damn it!” Lynn complained as they slumped in their seats.

“What I meant was, we use our words and unity as a group to defeat Chandler,” Lincoln clarified. “And we start with the infiltration. Lynn, Eva, you’ll disguise yourselves as security guards and replace the ones guarding the building.”

Lynn and Eva looked at each other, unsure of working together after everything that just went down between them. Ultimately, they acknowledged each other with a nod, then nodded to Lincoln, showing they were on board with the plan.

“Once we get past the guards, we’ll need a distraction,” Lincoln went on. “Leni, Lindsay, that’s where you two come in.”

“So we just use our good looks to charm our way through the building?” Leni questioned.

“I like that plan,” Lindsay clapped happily. “I’ve always wanted to be a model.”

“Lindsay, focus!” Leni told her. “This is a life-or-death mission, not a trip to the mall!”

“Well, it’s technically not a matter of life-or-death, Leni,” Lincoln corrected her. “But the stakes are pretty high.”

“Hey, wait a minute,” Duncan interrupted. “What do I get to do?”

“Why, Duncan, you and Luan are gonna set up a series of booby traps to keep the guards off our tail,” Lincoln answered.

“Like Home Alone?” Luan inquired. “I like that! After all, there’s snow place like home for the holidays!”

Luan laughed while everyone else groaned.

“Get it?” She asked.

“Moving on,” Lincoln deadpanned. “After we find the news room, the rest of us will confront Chandler, Desi, and Rico. Well, most of us. Lisa, Max, you’ll hack into the TV network and broadcast Chandler’s confession to all of Canada.”

“Leave it to us, big brother,” Lisa assured.

“Paying evil unto evil has never felt so good right now,” Max grinned evilly.

“But what about the animals?” Dawn asked. “I can’t begin to imagine what Edward and Maple are going through.”

“Yes, we must get them back,” Hope agreed.

“Lana, Ella,” Lincoln said to his animal-loving sister and Gwen’s cousin.

“Yes, Lincoln?” They both asked.

“You’ll be going to the animal shelter with Hope and Dawn to free Edward and Maple,” Lincoln explained. “I’ve got an idea on how to include them in our plan.”

“You got it, Linc,” Lana nodded.

“We’d hate to see those innocent animals suffer,” Ella added.

“Okay, then. Let’s move!” Lincoln declared.

“Yeah!” Everyone else cheered.

Elsewhere, Sanders and MacArthur were still struggling with the fussy babies, when Bobby, Rita, Lynn Sr., Jacob, the Greens, Owen’s parents, and DJ and Gwen’s mothers arrived on the scene.

“Oh, thank God!” MacArthur exclaimed in relief. “Please tell me that blondie wife of yours is still here!”

“Uh, sorry, she’s not,” Bobby said sheepishly.

“What?!” MacArthur yelled.

“Yeah, she went to the Celebrity Manhunt studio to fight Chandler,” Bobby explained.

“Look, we don’t know what’s wrong with these babies!” Sanders said, sounding exhausted. “We just want them to stop crying!”

“Wait!” Momma DJ suddenly said. “I think I know the problem!”

She scooped each baby from the exhausted police cadets and cradled them in her arms. Instantly, Leandro and Lucita calmed down and fell asleep in her arms.

“Huh. They were just sleepy,” Sanders observed. “Who knew?”

“I did,” MacArthur bragged, though practically everyone, including Sanders, deadpanned at her.

“Wow!” Lynn Sr. awed. “Momma DJ’s got the magic touch.”

“You got that right,” Rita agreed. “I just hope Lincoln and the others get back soon.”

“Rita, you’ve seen Lincoln,” Lynn Sr. reassured her. “He’s called The Man with the Plan for a reason. We just gotta have faith.”

In the sky, Chris and Chef were flying in their helicopter towards Canada. Since all flights to Toronto were booked, they were forced to contact the producers to loan them the helicopter, and they begrudgingly accepted.

“Chris, you call this flying!?” Chef yelled, as Chris was rushing to get to Canada before Chandler could do anymore damage. “Maybe I should take over for a while!”

“No way, dude!” Chris denied. “It’s my show, my helicopter, my rules!”

“I think you mean our show!” Chef argued. “We started it together, we host together, we go down together! Now, give me those controls!”

“Never!” Chris yelled.

As the two started to fight over the cyclic stick, they didn’t realize they were flying straight into a snowstorm. The helicopter started shaking, causing Chris and Chef to stop fighting and pay attention.

“Where’s all this turbulence coming from?” Chris asked.

“I don’t know, but somehow, you’re to blame for it!” Chef shouted.

Suddenly, the helicopter’s rotors stopped spinning, sending them plummeting towards the ground screaming.

On the ground, Sid was still riding with Russ and his Ohio Oom-Pah Band in their moving truck, when the driver slammed on the brakes and stopped, causing Sid and the band to slide forward.

“Driver, why’d you stop?” Russ asked after recovering.

“A helicopter just crashed in front of us,” The driver explained.

“A helicopter?” Sid questioned. “This Christmas keeps getting weirder and weirder.”

She and Russ stepped outside and saw the wrecked helicopter in front of them in the middle of the road. Chris and Chef crawled out of the cockpit, looking dazed.

“Someone get a number on that taxi,” Chef mumbled, before falling over.

“Waiter, there’s a Loud in my soup,” Chris said dizzily, falling on top of Chef.

Sid was starstruck upon seeing the two hosts of the reality show her bestie was on right in front of her.

“You’re C-C-Chris McLean and C-Chef Hat-c-chet!” She said excitedly.

“Of course we are,” Chef said rhetorically, standing up while carrying Chris in his arms.

“Thanks for the cookies, Grandma,” Chris said woozily.

“Hey, your friend looks pretty wrecked,” Russ observed. “Should we take him to the closest hospital?”

“No, no hospital!” Chris refused. “Need to see Canada in a Loud.”

“Uh, I’m sorry?” Russ asked, confused.

“Long story,” Chef replied.

“You’re heading to Canada?” Sid asked. “Me too! I’m trying to make things right with Ronnie Anne!”

“Ronnie Anne?” Chef inquired. “Girl, your brain must be whacked if you think Ronnie Anne can changed.”

“I’m not whacked!” Sid argued. “I’m Sidney Chang, Ronnie Anne Santiago’s best friend, and I just want to say how sorry I am to Ronnie Anne.” She then turned to Russ. “Can we take them with us, Russ?”

“If they’re that desperate to get to Canada, of course we can,” Russ accepted. “As long as we take your friend to the nearest hospital once we get to Toronto.”

“Yeah, sure, whatever,” Chef said dismissively. “Now can we please get back on the road?”

Chef continued to carry Chris as he followed Sid and Russ into the truck. Once they were back inside, the driver started the moving van up again and continued driving towards Canada.

After Dawn, Hope, Lana, and Ella rescued Edward and Maple from the animal shelter, the Loud Family and their friends began initiating Lincoln’s plan to break into the Celebrity Manhunt studio. Eva and Lynn grabbed two security guards who were standing at the entrance by the arms and pulled them back, then they took their place while wearing security guard outfits.

“Okay, Leni, Lindsay, you’re clear,” Eva said into her walkie-talkie.

“Roger that,” Leni’s voice replied.

Leni and Lindsay walked past Eva and Lynn and stepped into the building.

“I can’t believe we get to be the distraction,” Lindsay said excitedly as they walked the halls. “This is so great!”

“Actually, Lindsay, you’re the distraction,” Leni reminded her. “You distract the big, scary security guy while I get the key to the video room.”

“Still, at least we get to spend more time together,” Lindsay said, looking on the bright side of things.

They hid behind a wall as they saw the entrance to the broadcast room being guarded by a bouncer. Lindsay bravely walked up to the man while Leni tiptoed along the floor, then the former cleared her throat and spoke.

“Can I have your attention?” Lindsay asked the bouncer.

The bouncer looked down at her with a stern glare, making Lindsay nervous.

“Where’s the bathroom?” Lindsay asked.

“It’s, uh, right over there,” The bouncer pointed.

He then looked down and saw Leni about to reach for his keys that were on his belt.

“Oh, stupid contacts,” Leni mumbled, touching the ground for them, then pretended to pick them up. “Oh, here they are. I’d better go wash them off.”

Inside the women’s restroom, Lindsay was in the stall relieving herself, when Leni stepped in, not happy with Lindsay for almost blowing their cover.

“Lindsay!” She scolded angrily. “You call that a distraction?!”

After flushing the toilet, Lindsay stood up and walked out, realizing her mistake.

“What?” Lindsay asked defensively. “I had to go potty.”

“Well, I got my hands dirty for nothing,” Leni grumbled as she washed her hands. “Now we gotta call Luna and Trent to initiate plan B?”

“What’s plan B?” Lindsay asked.

“Our backup plan,” Leni clarified, bringing out her own walkie-talkie. “Luna, Trent, we need you.”

Back out in the hallway, the bouncer was still keeping watch for any intruders, when he heard “O-o-h Child” by The Five Stairsteps playing.

O-o-h child

Things are gonna get easier

O-o-h child

Things’ll get brighter

Trying to find the source of the music, the bouncer left his post and walked over to the sound room, where he opened the door and saw Luna and Trent messing around with the music.

“Hey!” He barked. “You’re not allowed in here!”

“It’s cool, bro,” Trent told him. “Chill. Listen to some music. Live a little.”

He picked up a pair of headphones and put them on the bouncer’s ears, which were still playing the song.

O-o-h child

Things are gonna get easier

O-o-h child

Things’ll get brighter

“Yeah, listen to those words,” Luna nodded. “Now, bring it down hard!”

She then started dancing and lip syncing to the song.

Someday

We’ll put it together and we’ll get it all done

“What are you doing?” The bouncer asked, confused.

“Dance off, brah,” Luna replied. “Me and you.”

Someday when your head is much lighter

“Trent,” Luna said, offering a hand.

Trent shook his head and refused.

“Subtle,” Luna improvised. “Take it back.”

Someday

We’ll walk in the rays of a beautiful sun

“What are you doing?!” The bouncer demanded.

“We’re distracting you, you big turd blossom,” Luna joked.

“And it was all her idea,” Trent added, pointing to Luna.

The bouncer felt his belt for his keys, but realized he didn’t have them on his person anymore. He tore the headphones off and ran out of the room.

“Geez, what a Grinch,” Trent remarked.

“Tell me about it,” Luna grumbled.

In the hallway, Duncan had the key to the broadcast room on his person, having snatched it from the bouncer while he was distracted.

“And that guy can’t follow us,” Duncan grinned as he squirted maple syrup all over the floor. “Because I’m blocking his path back to the broadcast room with maple syrup.”

However, after finishing, he then saw another puddle of maple syrup in front of him. “Aw, Luan!” He complained. “Come on!”

“And I covered your way out!” Luan added, before she took note of Duncan’s annoyed expression. “Oh, I guess I should’ve done that after you did your part, huh?”

“Uh-huh,” Duncan nodded. “How am I supposed to get out?!”

“Hey, you!” The bouncer yelled, running towards them. “Give me back that key!”

Duncan looked above him and saw a metal pole hanging from the ceiling. Using his experience from juvie, he jumped up, grabbed the pole, and shimmied his way across the ceiling, before landing on the other side with Luan. The two then watched the bouncer slipped on the maple syrup and got covered in it. Every time he tried to get back up, he kept getting covered in more. The bouncer managed to pick himself up, only to trigger a wire, which dropped a bag of pillow feathers on him. After that, he tripped and fell into the other half of maple syrup. Duncan and Luan laughed and pointed at the hapless bouncer.

“Talk about sticky feathers!” Luan chuckled.

“Oh, man!” Duncan wheezed. “Classic prank!”

Luan soon snapped out of it, however. “Come on, Duncan,” She said. “We still got a job to do.”

“Oh, right,” Duncan realized. “Thanks for that.”

The two then ran off.

At the entrance to the broadcast room, Lincoln, Dawn, Ronnie Anne, and the others were waiting for Luan and Duncan to return. Clyde tried to say something to Lincoln, but couldn’t due to the guilt and shame.

“Hey, it’s okay, Clyde,” Lincoln said soothingly, as he knew what Clyde was going to say. “I know you didn’t mean it.”

Clyde gave Lincoln a small smile as Luan and Duncan came running up.

“We got it!” They said in unison as Duncan handed the keys to Lincoln and he found the one to the broadcast room.

“Okay, guys, this is it,” Lincoln reminded them. “But before we go in, I have something to say to you all.”

“Shoot, Linc,” DJ said.

“I just wanted to say I’ve never been happier to be spending this Christmas Eve with you,” Lincoln said sincerely. “You guys are the best sisters, friends, girlfriend, and sister-in-law/ex-girlfriend I could ever ask for.”

Lincoln’s sisters, friends from school, friends from Total Drama, Dawn, and Ronnie Anne smiled at his speech, some even shedding tears.

“Okay, enough of the mushy stuff, ladies,” Duncan teased. “We’ve got a Chandler to take down!”

Lincoln put the key into the lock and managed to unlock the door.

Inside the broadcast room, Chandler sat in a chair and spun around in it, giggling with glee, while Desi and Rico had gone out for some hot chocolate. He was so distracted, he didn’t seem to notice Lincoln opening the door and Lisa and Max sneaking in over to the broadcast equipment.

“This is the best Christmas ever!” He said happily. “I finally trashed Lincoln’s rep not just in Canada, but in America as well.”

“Yeah, except you forgot the part where we get our perfect Christmas after we beat you up,” Duncan’s voice said.

Chandler stopped spinning in shock, got out of his chair, and turned to see the Louds, Lincoln’s friends, and all the Total Drama contestants standing before him, looking very angry.

“Lincoln?!” He exclaimed in shock.

“Chandler!” Lincoln growled, marching towards him.

He punched Chandler in the face and kicked him in the groin, sending him to the floor.

“How did you get out?” Chandler demanded, ignoring the pain on his face and his crotch.

“Doesn’t matter!” Lincoln snapped. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?!”

“Of course,” Chandler claimed as he stood up. “I made you the loser you’re supposed to be, not just in Royal Woods, but in Canada as well.”

“Wrong!” Lincoln argued. “You’ve finally shown this country how arrogant and petty you are!”

Lisa grabbed a camera and turned to Max, who nodded and pressed a button, allowing Chandler’s confession to be broadcast throughout Canada.

(Galleria Mall)

“I don’t know, Lincoln,” Chandler said as everyone in the mall watched the broadcast. “Compared to me, you’re a lot more selfish when it comes to getting what you want.”

“Yeah, but unlike you, I realize when I go too far and try to make up for what I did!” Lincoln countered. “And to think this all started when I wanted to get an invitation to your birthday party! I should never have even tried in the first place if I knew I was gonna get Lori in trouble at work! Sure, I took advantage of her, but you took advantage of me more personally, which is 2 times worse!”

The entire mall gasped at this.

“So, what?” Chandler mocked, like he could care less. “You’d chose a boring, dull life with your family?”

“I do now, and I always will, now that I’ve seen your true nature!” Lincoln asserted. “And let me clear a few things up for you: one, the moose I caught on the island was a male, but the moose that chased you in middle school was a female! Are you that sexist?!”

Everyone gasped again.

“Second, I only cheated in the brunch challenge because there were so many dishes my girlfriend couldn’t eat because of her principles!” Lincon continued. “Thirdly, my relationship with Bridgette is strictly platonic! Geoff only got on my case because Ronnie Anne was feeding him lies! Sure, I may have lost out on a hundred thousand bucks and a million dollars, but I left both my seasons with my head held high, the best new girlfriend in the world, and with so many friends I can ask for in addition to my old ones from home! And that’s what makes me a winner! The only loser here is you!”

(Celebrity Manhunt studio)

“Ah, so what?” Chandler huffed. “You can tell me the truth as long as you want, no one will believe you. Canadians can be so ignorant, so gullible, they’ll shut you out and pay more attention to me! They’ll never know that I was the one who got you in trouble with Mr. Bolhofner all those times, or the time I conned you out of a Rip Hardcore backpack, or the time I summoned those aliens to Earth and pinned the blame on you!”

Instead of fighting more, Lincoln stopped and simply smirked. “I don’t need to Chandler,” He said. “You just did it yourself.”

“What?” Chandler asked, confused.

He turned to see Lisa and Max recording his confession, making him gasp in shock.

“And now we’re gonna see what an entire country thinks of you,” Lincoln teased.

(Galleria Mall)

Everyone was shocked and enraged at Chandler for calling all of Canada ignorant and gullible, but they were more enraged to hear the truth from him about all those incidents.

“Liar!” A person shouted in anger.

A whole bunch of other people shouted the same thing and started booing at Chandler, with one person picking up a chair and throwing it at the mall jumbo screen, smashing it.

“We trusted you!” Another person shouted.

At a bar, the patrons stood up from their seats, yelling and cursing at Chandler.

“Traitor!” A patron screamed.

(Celebrity Manhunt studio)

Chandler could only watch in horror as practically everyone in Canada jeered him and condemned him. However, that horror soon turned to anger as he turned to Lincoln.

“You!” He exclaimed. “You have made a fool of me for the last time, Lincoln Loud!”

“Funny, I thought I already did when I called you out a week ago,” Lincoln said. At this point he didn’t even care what insults Chandler could throw at him right now. “You did this to yourself.”

Chandler looked ready to throttle Lincoln, but before he could, everyone in Lincoln’s family and all his friends, both from home and from Total Drama, popped up in front of him, causing him to back down and look nervous.

“So, a hippie, am I?” Dawn growled, sounding like an actual animal.

“You’ve got 10 seconds to give us all a good reason why we shouldn’t beat you to a literal bloody pulp right now!” Jasmine threatened.

“I’m sorry!” Chandler pleaded. “I didn’t know this was gonna happen! I didn’t mean everything I did or said! I blame television!”

“Nice try. What do you take us for, idiots?” Gwen scoffed. “Once you ring the bell, you can’t unring it.”

“No, please!” Chandler begged. “I’ve changed my mind! I do want to be Lincoln’s friend!”

“You should’ve thought of that before you decided to go back on your promise and bully him in middle school,” Bridgette sneered.

“Boy, you just downright mean!” Leshawna snarled.

“Wait!” Chandler cried. “Stop!”

But his plea fell on deaf ears. Lori, Leni, Luna, Luan, Lynn, Lucy, Lana, Lola, Lisa, Clyde, Liam, Rusty, Zach, Stella, Kara, Beth, Bridgette, Courtney, Dawn, DJ, Duncan, Eva, Gwen, Harold, Izzy, Jasmine, Katie, Leshawna, Lindsay, Ronnie Anne, Sadie, and Trent all ganged up on Chandler and beat him up, pulling him into a fight cloud. Chandler was fine fighting against Lincoln’s sisters, his two female friends, even Ronnie Anne, but with all the enraged Total Drama contestants aiding them, he didn’t stand a chance. Once the fight cloud cleared, the Loud Sisters, Lincoln’s friends, and the Total Drama contestants separated, and Chandler was seen lying on the floor, moaning in pain. He had a broken left arm, a broken nose, missing teeth, a black eye, and a broken right leg, with blood just pouring out from every orifice of his body. But the most humiliating factor about his defeat was that he was in his underwear, the Loud Sisters, Lincoln’s friends, and the Total Drama contestants having torn off his clothes during their beatdown of him. And the camera was still recording, so everyone in Canada no doubt saw Chandler’s beatdown and cheered for his demise. At that moment, Desi and Rico returned to the broadcast room with three cups of hot chocolate, but dropped the cups in shock when they saw Lincoln’s sisters and friends standing over Chandler.

“Chandler!” Desi cried.

“What the hell happened to you?!” Rico shouted.

The Total Drama contestants and Loud Sisters, as well as Lincoln’s friends and Ronnie Anne, then turned furiously to them.

“Time for our exit,” Rico whispered to Desi, who nodded.

The two made a run for it, but Hope confronted them with Edward and Maple.

“Sic ‘em!” She ordered, unleashing the platypus and raccoon onto the Celebrity Manhunt reporters.

Maple screeched as she leapt at Desi, her claws out, and mauled her viciously, while Edward stabbed Rico with his poisonous ankle barb, paralyzing him, and then proceeded to pee in Rico’s still open mouth before climbing off of him. After much effort, Desi finally managed to pry Maple away from her, though she had numerous scratches all over her body from the raccoon’s assault, picked up a still-paralyzed Rico, and tried to make a run for it in the other direction, but Lori and Ronnie Anne stopped her by appearing in front of her.

“Don’t think we’ve forgotten about you two,” Lori sneered.

“What are you gonna do to us?” Desi asked fearfully.

“Since you didn’t listen the first time I told you to stay away from my family, maybe this will make things more clear,” Ronnie Anne replied with a maniacal grin.

Desi gulped as Lori and Ronnie Anne reached out for her and Rico.

Outside the studio, Desi and Rico were tied together into a jumbo human pretzel, moaning in pain. Lori threw the two reporters into a dumpster, and then Ronnie Anne shut the lid.

“Well, now I can officially say those two got canned,” Ronnie Anne punned as she and Lori walked over to the others.

For the first time, everyone laughed at the pun, even Luan.

“Good one!” Luan chuckled.

They then watched as the injured Chandler was wheeled on a stretcher into an ambulance, which drove off.

“So, that’s that,” Lincoln said. “We should probably head back to the police station and pick up our folks.”

“Not to mention mine and Bobby’s babies,” Lori added.

Everyone nodded in agreement as they began their long walk back to the Toronto Police Headquarters.