Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Zane, buddy,” Kai slurs from his place on the bed, eyes glassy and voice hoarse. “You’re not helping.”

Cole makes the motion of smacking him in the face with a pillow. “You shut up,” he says. “You just broke a thermometer with your brain. You have no say in anything whatsoever.”

Kai resists the urge to bury his head on the sheets and moan very loudly. Both Cole and Zane are pacing around the room and continue with their action of not helping, as Zane keeps muttering to himself and Cole looks at Kai like he’s responsible for all his problems. Which Kai guesses he is, at the moment, but it’s not like it’s his fault.

Probably. They don’t really know how this happened. That is kind of the whole reason for this.

“I said I was sorry,” he whines, as Nya sits next to him with a glass of water. “I swear it wasn’t this bad in the morning.”

Nobody seems to believe him, his teammates arguing loudly around him and only paying him attention when it is to glare in his direction for being so stupid that he caught a bug from something who-knows-when. It’s not like he deliberately tried to ignore the signs his brain was sending him when he joined the guys in training, just after showing up late for breakfast with a pounding headache and a refusal on his body’s part to consume anything. It’s just kinda hard to distinguish symptoms of an actual illness from symptoms of sleep deprivation when it’s six in the morning and you fell asleep a little before two because you wanted to play something with your family after getting home from patrol. That, for example, is a bad decision that he can be held responsible for. Being sick, however, he didn’t even realize it until he passed out on the couch after training and got woken up by Wu, who stated he had a fever and was to stay put for the rest of the day.

Thing is, not even Wu seems sure of what a fever means for a guy whose body is essentially immune to volcanoes. And no, it’s not like Kai’s never been sick in his life. But they’re all still relatively new to their powers as something that just is rather than something given to them by their weapons or by Lloyd. Kai’s body, for one, doesn’t really process temperature as such, but he’s been told that he’s always a bit warmer than anyone should be, which used to drive Nya crazy when they were kids. He supposes this is what heat feels like when it’s not on your power. He’s sweaty and achy and generally gross, but he doesn’t feel particularly weird. Especially given their recent return from Chen’s island and everything that happened there to mess with their powers.

So. Wu said this was just a fever. Possibly a cold, but his slight cough can be attributed to dehydration. It’s not like it’s anything serious. What is the worst that could happen?

According to the resident nindroid, human extinction.

“So in conclusion,” Zane says, pacing around Kai’s bedroom between Lloyd, Jay and Nya, all who are varying in degrees of frowning and glowering, “your body should have no need to develop a fever, since its already elevated temperature should be enough to kill any pathogen agent that manages to enter. That is, unless the agent has adapted to your temperature, the high numbers giving it a reason to evolve, but that would make it immune to a regular human fever, and potentially deadly for other human beings, which makes little sense survival-wise…”

“Zane, wait. Wait. Go back to that.” Kai’s hand quickly goes to cover his mouth. “Did you just say if you catch this you might die?”

“Well, not me. I’ve done it before. I cannot speak for the others. They could be in mortal peril.”

“Nobody is in mortal peril!” Jay screams, his naturally high pitch being somewhat out of place now in his surprisingly calm posture, the only one seemingly not panicking over the possibility that Kai’s powers are melting someone’s brain as they speak. “You said it yourself. If we think of Elemental Masters as a species, such a dangerous feature of the power of Fire could mean the extinction of said species plus others. Like, if the previous Fire Master ever got a common cold he should’ve killed everyone around him. That doesn’t make much sense on evolution’s part, does it?”

That… was a lot of fancy smart talking coming from Jay’s mouth, and Kai half wonders if he might’ve just hallucinated it. More likely his fevered brain replaced Nya or Zane with Jay, because he doesn’t think he could’ve come up with that reasoning on his own in the state he is in.

“More like on my grandfather’s part than evolution’s,” Lloyd points out, leaning on the doorframe, “but Jay does have a point. Wouldn’t we know if this had happened before? A lot of people could’ve died if Zane’s hypothesis was correct.”

Kai mutters under his breath, “Wouldn’t we have known if there were other Elemental Masters,” bitterly hoping that nobody listens to him, but unfortunately, he’s the center of the room right now, and everybody’s mood sours as they think of the very important secrets both of their masters have kept before.

Both of their masters. He also doesn’t wanna think about that. Especially with how Lloyd keeps looking at him and looking away from him, like he both has a need to help and a need to calculate how many people he can lose in such little time. What happened with Chen was bad enough to get back from, and things still don’t feel totally normal between them. Of course, somebody’s father had to come in and make everything more complicated than it already is.

Kai did tell Wu not to bring the others, but that’s kind of a lot to ask when you live in a small temple with other six or seven people (Misako has been coming and going ever since the death of her husband), and Lloyd managed to spot him as Wu carried him to his bedroom, half conscious and feverish. Attempting to lure him away by promising nothing was wrong only resulted in him immediately reporting his state to the others, bringing in an anxious nindroid, a traumatized Cole, an angry sister and Jay. Of all of those, he’s not sure which one is the worst one, but the one who’s currently practically combing his hair as he checks his temperature every two seconds is a strong contestant.

Kai once called Cole a germophobe because of something like this, but that’s really only true in the toughest sense of the word. Sickness is the only aspect in which Cole seems to beat Zane at being the Mom Friend (and maybe Kai too, but Kai’s maternal instinct comes more from growing up in an unhealthy environment where you have to grow up too soon, rather than purely selfless love and care for the people around you). Cole’s fear of illness has always seemed to push him into being a better friend and taking care of others, and Kai thought that was a good thing, back when Nya got the flu a few years back. He’s not so thankful now that he knows Cole enough to understand the motives behind this, his friend’s true history with sickness and loved ones. Also, when being on the receiving end of his friend’s overprotective nature, it becomes a lot more obvious that Cole’s ability to care is not as useful or mentally stable as he initially thought, and that he’s currently using the line between helpful kind of panic and panic kind of panic as a fucking jumprope.

“Are we sure it’s not heatstroke?” he’s saying right now. “He was already bad when we were training…”

“Isn’t that supposed to be because of external causes? It’s not nearly hot enough for that, the only heat in the room is coming from him.”

“Besides, he survived coming out of a volcano before, what could possibly be hotter than that…”

“Maybe it’s like an allergy?” Nya suggests. “Like when the immune system sees a danger where there isn’t any. Maybe that’s the way a fever works for a Fire Master.”

“I don’t know!” Zane yells. “That’s not how fevers work! Or elemental powers, for the matter. This does not compute!”

Nya yells back with hysterical annoyance. “Stop using robot lingo, we know you don’t actually do that!”

“Excuse me if I’m a bit worried at the moment!”

“We know!” Kai yells, his throat protesting at the act and everyone turning in his direction as he dares to challenge the sickness by speaking out loud. “We know, okay? Look. Sorry I’m… I’m worrying y’all, but I am fine. It’s probably just some cold and the fire is… reacting. Or something. I don’t know! I don’t know either!” He sighs with all the might of his obstructed respiratory system. “But could you guys just chill?”

His right ear promptly bursts into flames.

Cole jumps away like he’s seen a spider, a layer of frost extends across Zane’s metal shoulder, and Nya splashes Kai with the water from her glass in a panic. None of these actions actually manage to put out the fire, which he does by himself with a sigh and a little of his power. Good to see that’s still working, at least.

Jay cringes visibly. “That was a poor choice of words.”

“Your name was a poor choice of words.”

Kai glares at his sister, droplets dripping from his hair. Of course, Nya’s panic looks like anger, so she just glares back at him. Lloyd looks like he might cry if Kai tries hard enough.

“I’m fine,” he grits, and winces at how strained his voice actually sounds.

Nya’s eyes are throwing daggers at him.

“You can’t have colds,” she hisses. “You haven’t had a cold in all the years I’ve been stuck with you.”

Kai sighs. “Well, I existed for a whole two years before you were born.”

“Oh, great. So the last time you got sick like this was when you were two, and the only two people who might remember are dead. How perfect. That is a really good lead, Kai.”

Honestly. The dead parents is a low blow. He’d be impressed and a little proud if he didn’t feel like shit.

Cole growls, closing his fist as he looks around the room for something to punch that isn’t Kai’s face. ”What the hell is taking Wu so long?

“He’s brewing his magical tea or whatever,” Jay responds. “It’ll be fine, Cole. He’s probably seen something like this before. He’d let us know if it was dangerous.”

“You mean like a prophecy regarding one of his students?” Lloyd points out, crossing his arms. “Or a big serpent whose venom can make you evil that he had encountered before? Or an evil crime lord on an island? Or an evil overlord called the Overlord that I’m destined to defeat?”

Jay clears his throat. “Okay, fair.”

“Thanks for the reassurance, Lloyd,” Kai groans, the back of his hand against his forehead. Not that he was not thinking about that before. Or any other of Wu’s secrets. Such as the other Elemental Masters, as previously mentioned before. Or his own dead father, who was one of them and Wu’s friend, and the previous Fire Master, information that Wu never gave either Kai or his sister and that they had to find out from an evil crime lord on an island.

Suddenly, the room is very silent. Kai blinks and realizes everyone’s staring dumbfoundedly at him. “Did I say that out loud?”

“You say everything out loud.” His sister is pinching the bridge of her nose in utter disappointment.

“Did we know this?” Lloyd asks, confused. “Since when was your dad…”

Cole turns in Nya’s direction. “Is he delirious, or…”

She lets out a deep sigh. “We were going to tell you.”

Right. The new thing they found out about their father just after the Tournament, and only because Chen led Kai into thinking about his family’s past for the first time since they left the blacksmith shop. Were they… supposed to tell the others? Was it a secret? It’s not really such a strange thing, now that they know how Elemental Powers work. Not thanks to Wu. A little thanks to Garmadon. Lloyd’s dad. Who is also dead. Why is he thinking about dead fathers now for the first time in years…

“Oh.” Jay shrugs. “I mean, it kinda makes sense. I guess I thought it could’ve skipped a generation, maybe, but, yeah. You know, because my parents are not… But since you didn’t really know them…”

“When did this happen?” Cole interrupts him. “Did Chen tell you? Does Wu… Wait, was this why you were…”

“No. No.” Kai feels a quiet panic rising in his chest as he realizes what Cole is alluding to. “It wasn’t that. I wouldn’t have… I was faking, I wouldn’t do that to you… guys…” Suddenly he’s on his feet, rising up to meet Cole’s eyes, but the sight of him becomes very blurry. Everything suddenly turns heavy as his knees give in, and he feels the ground approaching. Then, he feels Cole’s calloused hands, gripping into him and hugging him for dear life, like he was the one falling. The rest of the world keeps shaking and spinning.

He swallows something. It tastes like bile. “Fuck,” he groans.

“Okay. It’s okay. You’re okay.” Jay stands too next to him, quietly reassuring him as he allows Kai to lean on him to get up and back on the bed. Kai vaguely sees that he’s positioned in a way that keeps Lloyd and Nya safely away from him, which he’s thankful for, given the twin expressions of pained worry on their faces. It’s almost as bad as the guilty look that Cole is giving him as he holds him, the tension in his muscles evident as he tries not to dig his nails on Kai’s burning skin.

“Sorry,” Cole says in a low voice. “You know I didn’t mean it like that. You’re good. It’s fine.”

“It’s not.” Kai whines. “I lied. I don’t feel well.”

“We know,” Nya says, gently, but he can see the way her expression shifts once he admits it.

“Everything spinning. Hurts.”

“What hurts?”

“Dunno.”

Dad, he thinks, irrationally, and he’d rather be dead now. He’d rather have died long before than have Nya and Lloyd look at him now like he’s dying, like he’s either of their fathers.

Cole, trembling but kind, guides his head to rest on the pillow and strokes his forehead, pushing back bangs that are damp with sweat. Suddenly, he pulls back with a cry like he’s been burned. It is probably not so far from the truth. He’s done it before during training or during arguments, when things get too, quite literally, heated. Kai’s headache is coming back with full force, making him think of training and spinning and anxious Earth Masters that are blasting down a building inside his head.

He moans, burying his face on the pillow. Cole’s hand reaches out again but Kai winces at the feeling of his muscles tensing at the touch, unable to take the heat that comes so naturally to Kai. He knows the love is there, but it is struggling to come across, obscured by fear.

“I think the fever’s going up,” he whispers, worriedly.

Kai manages to shake his head. “N-no. t’s just you. Just you.” Cole doesn’t seem to understand what he means by that.

“You don’t think…”

“What? Chen? No way.”

Jay hums, unsure. “I mean, it was a painful process. Taking our powers and all. But I went without mine for exactly as long as he did and I feel fine.”

“Yeah,” Cole replies. Kai opens his eyes again. “Mine did feel a little weird after I got them back, but not like this.”

Kai half expects any of them to mention the staff, which is the only messing-up-your-powers thing that he experienced and they didn’t. But they don’t say a word, in a way that makes him wonder if maybe they even remember that it happened, if they remember what he and Lloyd told them awkwardly and shaken once it was all over and they all wanted to fill in the blanks of what had happened while they were apart. It’s true that it has been a while since then, and Kai guesses he would’ve seen it before if the staff were to have any lasting damage on his brain and body.

“Are you cold?”

That’s a stupid question. He’s never cold. His bones hurt and his muscles are on fire, but actually, he’s curling up on himself, which is probably what prompted Cole’s stupid question. “Never. No,” he says out loud, barely stopping himself from shaking his head, as it’ll only make the headache worse.

“Zane?”

“Can’t possibly hurt.” The nindroid approaches the bed and sits by Kai’s side, his hand already covered with layers of ice. He places it softly on Kai’s forehead, looking a lot less anxious now faced with the most immediate crisis of Kai almost collapsing, rather than the hypothetical crisis of what Kai’s illness could mean, but both him and Cole still look at him like he could die any moment and that’s actually what’s killing him. That, and also the germs. Mostly the germs.

“Stop,” he begs, weakly. Cole’s hand is also on his face, soft with care but gross all the same in touch with the sweat. “Leave me alone.” Zane’s lips twist with pity.

“I apologize. We did not intend to make this worse. But we do need to bring your temperature down.”

Kai sighs. He can actually breathe normally, not having coughed or sneezed in a significant amount despite his previous statement of it’s probably just some cold, but his blood is running hot and fast in an attempt to keep his body going and he feels like he’s gone through a marathon in the worst way possible.

“So.” Cole sighs, sitting on the bed next to Kai’s frame. “High temperature. Probably fever but we are not ruling out heatstroke. I know there are no external causes, but maybe his fire counts as one? Dizziness. Lack of eloquence, but what’s new.” He tugs at Kai’s hand, awkwardly. “Do you have any other symptoms?”

Kai pushes his head back into the pillow. “Your’ giving me a headache.”

Cole looks at him like he’s been slapped. “That’s not… Look, Kai, I’m trying! I’m scared too! We’re trying to find out…”

“Yeah, he knows that, Cole.” Jay comes up and places a hand on his shoulder. “We’re all scared, but he’s right. Freaking out isn’t going to help him.”

“How are you not freaking out?” Nya asks, a bit accusingly.

Jay gives her a pointed look. “Because I grew up in tetanus hell at a relative distance from civilization and hospitals. So I actually know a thing or two about first aid and staying calm in the face of potentially dangerous injuries. Ask my mom how often I’d get hurt or accidentally cut myself playing at the junkyard.” He pauses to give Kai a reassuring smile, which is... appreciated, actually. “It usually turned out okay in the end, but there was always a possibility for something bad, so she made sure I knew what to do in case that was the outcome. So yeah, this could be a crisis or it could be nothing. First step in any way is staying calm.”

There’s a beat of silence in the room, glances floating around and going from Jay’s direction to Kai’s. The latter clears his throat, weakly. “Hey, Cole?”

“Yes?”

“Is this what you meant by symptoms?

“How so?” Cole frowns.

“I think I just hallucinated Jay being calm.” There’s another beat, and he swallows. “Also, I might puke any minute now.”

“On it,” says Lloyd, quickly leaving the room as Kai looks at Cole and thinks he sees the effort in his muscles as he suppresses the urge to pull at his own hair.

Jay, still the only one that looks somewhat sane, turns to look back at Zane. “You’ve been scanning him, right? What does Pixal say?”

“Can she tell us exactly how high his temperature is? You know, since he blew up the thermometer.” Kai notices Cole is finally looking away from him, ever since he brought up vomiting. Maybe he should’ve done it earlier.

“She should be able to, yes. She says… I am not telling you that, you’re just going to worry.” Zane goes quiet for a bit, staring into the void of emptiness in front of his eyes. “What do you mean by that, Pixal?”

“Just listen to her,” Jay all but begs of him. “She’s never been wrong before.”

Typical. Only two people are sane enough for Kai to trust to keep him alive and one of them is trapped inside someone else’s head while the other one is Jay. If he wasn’t gonna die before, he certainly is now.

“What do you mean she’s not telling you, she’s inside your head!” The volume of Cole’s screams makes Kai’s head throb and Cole absently puts a hand on his shoulder in response to his whining. “Just read her mind or something and get the numbers!”

“We don’t share a neural drive, she is her own person… She just told me to give her a minute to analyze the scans and to keep…” Zane hesitates and looks like he just gulped for a second, “… keep my stuff together.”

Nya frowns, giving him an amused expression. “Did Pixal say shit?”

Zane looks like he’s replaying every choice in his life that led him to this but he’s also the calmer Kai’s ever seen him since he got sick, so he mentally thanks Pixal for whatever she said to him. “She most certainly did.” Zane looks down back at Nya. “She’s gathering data. She asks if anything similar to this happened back when you were kids.”

Kai exchanges an awkward glance with his sister, who keeps glaring every time she looks at him. “I mean…”

“Not like he’d let me know if it did,” she replies, bitterly.

Kai frowns at her. “Not like we could afford medicine back then, Nya.”

“Not like I’d be better off if my sole provider died because he was an idiot, Kai.”

“Did it happen or not?” Jay asks, exasperated. Kai gives him a very loud sigh.

“Not like this, I think? If… I mean, if it ever got this bad, I usually just… passed out and didn’t wake up until I got better? But it’s not like I got sick very often…”

Nya joins Cole in a series of breathing exercises as they both fist their hands not to punch or pull something, while Lloyd and Zane each give Kai a look of horrified wonder.

“How did you even survive this long?” Lloyd comes back into the room with a bin, which he places smoothly on the side of Kai’s bed despite the angry tone of his voice. “Both of you. How could anyone that was raised by you survive for longer than a week?”

“I raised you,” Kai defends himself, struggling to get up as he feels the nausea coming and going. Cole grabs him by the shoulders and Kai’s body tenses at how anxious his grip feels.

“And look how I turned out!”

“Your criminal past was before me,” he complains, as both of Cole’s hands keep pressing against his cheeks, “you can’t blame me for that. Cole, I swear on our dead mothers, if you don’t get your hands off me, I might throw up on you.”

“No, Kai, this is serious! This could be dangerous! We don’t know what it is. We don’t know if you’ll be safe. But if we pay attention to it now, then it won’t get worse, and you’ll be fine, and it won’t be dangerous, but we have to find out what it is so it doesn’t get worse and so you don’t die.”

Everybody goes very quiet, minus Nya who is muttering something about how Kai had to bring up the dead mothers. Apparently, he actually has it in him and his fucked up body to feel sorry for a second, as Cole keeps staring at him with glassy eyes, and they stay like this for a while, until they’re interrupted by a creak at the door.

Wu enters the room with a steaming cup in his hands, and looks around, no doubt having heard at least a good chunk of their collective crashout. Kai remains still and looks down, the pit of nausea growing in his stomach. He fears if he moves just the tiniest bit he’ll actually live up to his promise of throwing up on Cole. Almost as an apology, he looks blindly for his friend’s hand and squeezes his wrist affectionately.

Cole takes a very deep breath.

“I should inform you,” says Wu’s voice, “that such an outcome is very unlikely.” Kai feels him approaching the two of them and swallows as the aroma of the supposedly healing tea fills the room. That’s not helping either. He tugs again at Cole’s hand.

“Could somebody that is not contagious and gross give him a hug?” he asks the room. “And, uh. Save one up for me once this is over?”

“He just asked for physical affection.” Lloyd sounds the most scared he’s been through this entire ordeal. “Zane, he’s delirious!”

Kai sits upright on the bed. “Away.”

Lloyd frowns. “But you just said…”

“Lloyd, away.” Kai pushes him and Cole from the side of the bed and throws up his guts into the bin.

He tastes the smell of the tea in the bile, which makes everything spin again. As does the feeling of layers of sweat over his skin, his clothes sticking to him, Cole’s body language as he wants to get closer and ends up getting away because he just can’t take it. And Kai trusts this people with his life, he trusts Cole and his fear, he trusts Wu despite everything, despite his father and the secrets, fuck, he even trusts Jay, but still. Still. Fuck. He feels awful right now. He just wishes everybody would stop looking at him.

“Go away,” he cries, his face red with embarrassment and panic and fever. “Let me… You’re not… You’re all looking at me like you’re writing up my eulogy, and you don’t need… don’t want you to…”

He pushes away an arm that he thinks it’s Nya’s. It turns out to be Jay, who’s not as easily shoved back as his little sister (then again, neither is his little sister, hasn’t been since she was seven). “It’s fine, buddy. It’s fine. We’ve seen worse.” A hand reaches for his back and pats him gently, pushing back the longest strands of his unkept hair as he keeps heaving. For some reason (probably because of, you know, the trauma), his touch feels a lot less overwhelming than Cole’s and Kai’s body doesn’t flinch. “You’re gonna get better, I promise you. Just breathe.”

Kai tries so desperately not to sob at how kind his voice sounds, how loving, how gentle. He can’t remember this. Not his dad, not his mom, who left too early, or died, he hopes they died and didn’t choose to leave him. Not Wu, who he kept pushing away when he first met him, and who has been keeping secrets since that day. Not Nya, because he never let her know when this happened before, because he knew she would get this scared and he didn’t want her to see.

It’s scary. His body burns with his father’s fire and it’s terrifying. It didn’t use to be.

“Cole, please,” Jay says in a low voice. “You’re scaring him.”

“I didn’t mean to.” Cole’s voice sounds dangerously close to tears.

“I know,” Jay replies, understanding, and so is Kai, but he also feels like crying himself if he’s being honest.

“I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me,” he whimpers. A heavier, wrinkled hand, sets too on his shoulder.

“It’ll be alright,” says Wu in whispers. “Diseases such as these are not uncommon for elementals such as yourselves. It is an unpleasant experience, but it shall pass. As I have told you. It is merely a fever.”

It doesn’t feel like it.

Dad, Dad, Dad. The thought pains him, makes him feel like a little kid again. Passed out on the blacksmith shop’s floor, sleeping it off until it got better. Going to bed hungry, Nya’s tiny frame curled up against his in cold nights because he’s always been like this. Dad. Burning. Everything’s burning and spinning. He doesn’t feel like arguing right now. He leans against the closest supporting surface, which turns out to be Jay’s body. There is the faintest tension as he does so, but his friend doesn’t flinch, instead embracing him into a hug as he keeps drawing circles on his back.

Wu raises his voice in the general direction of the room. “I believe your brother just needs some space at the moment. And perhaps some…”

“No. Don’t.” Kai covers half his face with a hand, breathing through his mouth so as not to catch the scent of Wu’s remedy. “Not the “T” word. The literal “T” word. Or any word that has… anything to do with… consuming… anything. Just make it go away.”

Wu sighs patiently. “Very well.” He lays a hand on Kai’s forehead but chooses not to comment on the temperature. Kai leans into the touch, soft and cool. “Do tell me when you feel up for it.”

There’s a faint shuffling of feet and muttering as the others leave the room. Kai pictures Cole in Nya’s arms as he tells her of his mom and she tells him it’ll be okay, even if she doesn’t entirely believe it. He pictures Nya, who needs somebody to tell her that it’ll be okay right now, but everything between her and Jay has been weird lately, and Jay is choosing to stay by Kai’s side anyway. He pictures Lloyd in the corner, maybe crying because he’s still not over his dad and this is scary for him too. He remembers Garmadon, and Chen, and his own father. He feels like the worst big brother in the world. He pictures Zane away from the others as he maintains a quiet talk with Pixal, and can only hope she’s telling him good things.

Jay gives a faint squeeze at his shoulder. “Want me to stay or want me to go with the others?” Kai shakes his head softly. Worst big brother. But this is what he wants, and that’s what Jay asked. “Okay. All good then. You need anything else? Like a blanket?” Kai shakes his head again. Jay doesn’t sound entirely convinced. “You sure you’re not cold? You keep shaking.”

“I’m not cold,” Kai manages. “I’m all wrong and I’m sick and my body is fucked up and it might kill me or you but I don’t get cold. I’m fucking terrified and I’m shaking.”

Jay doesn’t seem taken aback by that. “It’s okay. You get to be scared. But you don’t have to be. Because we’re gonna figure this out.” A hand goes up and finds its place on top of Kai’s head. “I promise you.”

Kai sleeps in fits.

He wakes up coughing or whimpering from time to time, and it’s awful but it’s not too bad. His body fights the sickness with the same aggression he fights everything else, and only Wu or Jay’s soothing voice is what manages to calm him down enough to finally sink into a more peaceful slumber. Zane comes and goes too, taking readings on his temperature and staying long enough for it to come down with his cold. Which it does, eventually. Enough so that they can actually use a thermometer.

Kai did ask to be left alone, but Zane’s powers are the only thing that doesn’t melt or flinch the moment it touches him, and Wu is the one who has the magic healing teas, and Kai asked for Jay to stay, for some reason. The latter is now the only one who remains sitting beside him, listening to the sound of his breathing as he sleeps. 

Only one can remain, he thinks.

He resists the urge to kick himself.

He is freaking out, actually. He’s never been one to react well to stress. Everybody knows that. But it’s like he told the others. He knows a thing or two. And he’s used to it. Both the first aid and the freaking out.

And, contrary to popular opinion, he actually has some level of emotional intelligence.

He knows freaking out is inevitable, especially for somebody with Cole’s history, or Lloyd’s… or actually, any of them. (It’s not the first time his teammates make him hyper-aware of how lucky he is.) He knows, too, that voicing it out loud will probably do more harm than good.

He sighs, taking in the sight of Kai’s body lying in front of him, his chest falling and rising unevenly. They had to change the sheets twice since he got sick, first because of a sorta small panic attack he had in which he almost set the bed on fire and second because he kept sweating through them, like a normal person with a fever and not a Fire Elemental. Jay keeps dividing his gaze between him and the hallway behind them, half expecting the others to pop out in the middle of the night, still anxious and unable to sleep. But he’s gotta hand it to them, they’re doing a fairly good job of giving Kai the space he needs.

Except for Jay, apparently. Nobody knows for sure what made him stay or what made Kai ask for him to stay, but that’s what they’re doing right now. And it’s not so bad once Jay gets used to the heat and the smell of vomit that are engulfing the room. None of this is worse than the junkyard, he reminds himself, in which the rooms were even smaller and there was no escaping the bacteria every time either of the three of them got sick.

In the dark, he keeps seeing Kai’s eyelids fluttering open, a small red light that he’s only seen on his friends when seeing them unlock their True Potential. Fire that comes and goes as it keeps Kai’s blood pulsing and breathing. He did agree to Wu’s tea eventually, which actually helped with the nausea once it was inside his system and not going through his nose, but his temperature is still high enough to justify that Jay stays up at two in the morning by his side.

Or maybe he doesn’t need to be in mortal peril, as Zane put it, for Jay to do something nice. Maybe he just likes being with his friend, or maybe he is actually a good friend himself, has anybody thought of that?

“You should be with Nya.”

Jay looks at him, to make sure he didn’t imagine the sound of his voice, and won’t be waking him up if he responds. And Kai looks back at him with the red little firelight in his eyes, so he guesses that yeah, he’s awake.

“Can’t.” He responds. “I’m with you now.” It’s ridiculous, actually, because everybody knows things have been weird with Nya ever since that stupid thing with Cole. He’s honestly surprised with how little Kai involves himself in his sister’s dramas, but he supposes he should be glad about it, as it means Kai won’t be frying him up anytime soon. Not on purpose, at least; the temperature in this room is still high. He sighs, deeply. “Besides, this is probably what she really wants. For you to be safe.”

He takes in the tension on Kai’s muscles, the flush on his cheeks, visible only through the little light from the end of the hallway that they leave on sometimes. “That is not her job,” he says.

“That is our job. We look out for each other.” Tentatively, Jay’s hand reaches for Kai’s shoulder, and squeezes him affectionately once he’s not met with annoyance. “For real this time.”

To his horror, Kai’s eyes fill with tears.

Instead of running away to call Nya, which is his first instinct, Jay pats him on the shoulder awkwardly. Kai actually seems more horrified at his own state than Jay, as he buries his head on the pillow and sheets with a weak gesture. Jay wonders what he heard when he said this time.

“I hate this,” Kai all but sobs. “I hate feeling like this.”

Jay feels his heart wrenching and he sits on the bed, as close to Kai as he can without overwhelming him. “I’m sorry, buddy.”

“I hate how she looks at me. How Cole does. Lloyd. Even Zane. Like I’m killing them. I don’t mean to.”

“We know you don’t.”

“It’s killing me.”

Jay frowns at that, disapproving. “Hey, nobody’s killing anyone, you dramatic piece of… toast. We just care.” He rubs at Kai’s back and his expression softens as he leans into the touch. “That’s just love. There’s nothing you can do about that.”

“But it shouldn’t hurt,“ he insists. “A dad or a brother. It shouldn’t hurt like this, if you… if you care. Caring shouldn’t hurt.”

Jay’s at least glad that he’s the one sitting beside him, and not Nya, or Lloyd, or even Zane, because as much as he trusts them, he doesn’t trust them not to burst into tears if they ever hear about this. There’s so much he should be saying to that, and he doesn’t know how to. “That’s not all there is to it, you know,” is what he settles for.

Kai cries, quietly. “What else is there?”

“This, for one.” Jay squeezes at Kai’s shoulder, the closest he can do to a hug without forcing him to sit up. “Is this okay?” There’s a pause, and then a faint nod that puts a smile on Jay’s face. “Good. Lemme check something.” He touches Kai’s cheek for only a second, and suppresses a sigh of relief. It actually feels like a normal human low grade fever now. “I think you’re actually getting better,” he says, and he means it. That’s why he’s here.

Maybe he’s doing an okay job, he thinks.

Kai groans, sandwiched as he is between his sister and his teammates, all of them except Jay, who’s standing mockingly by the couch, pretending he’s not discreetly taking pictures with his phone. “Does a dying man’s wish amount to nothing in this house?”

Zane grins above him as he keeps stroking his hair. “Are you complaining?”

“Not about you.” Zane’s hands are cold and comforting, even if his fever broke last night, and even if he’s not about to tell Zane how much he likes the company of his family. He looks pointedly at Jay, the only one not included in the group hug since the couch is too small and since, according to Nya, he already had his hugging privileges last night. Jay just smiles at him, seeming happy that he’s on good terms with Nya while getting to mess with Kai. “I did say to bring them one at the time.”

Jay shrugs innocently. “Sorry, bud.” He takes another snapshot, this one not even subtle. “Turns out you’re just that lovable.”

“I know you’re lying to me,” Kai glares. “That is just mean.”

“It’s not,” Lloyd says, squeezed between him and Nya, his face buried in Kai’s chest. “You are.”

“Mean or lovable?”

Lloyd’s grip around him tightens. “Both.”

Kai looks down at him, fondly. He has to admit, they are making an effort not to make him uncomfortable, all while basically holding him hostage with a hug. Cole hasn’t even tried to take his temperature, and Zane’s caressing his hair without running any scans. Impressive, really. Nya hasn’t really said anything, but that’s somehow oddly comforting. That’s just the way they are, in his family. His first one. Things are not the same anymore but the history they share is always there.

If anything, Lloyd with his koala grip is the one who’s struggling the most to give Kai his space, but Kai’s not about to put that on him after everything that’s happened. “How are you, big shot?”

The kid isn’t really a kid, he knows. His weight on Kai’s body is that of a teenage boy almost as old as him, but it’s just like Nya. Sometimes, he still looks just too much like the boy Kai saved from the Fire Temple. “You scared me before,” he says in a low voice.

Kai’s soul drops. “I’m sorry, kiddo,” he says, pulling Lloyd closer. “Though you know that’s not what I meant.”

It takes him a second to answer. “Later. I might want to talk later. Just… just not now.”

Kai nods, understanding. He doesn’t love the topic of dead fathers either. “Okay.” And just in case, just so that he knows, “I’m sorry.” Because I love you it’s not a thing they said on his first family, and sometimes it’s still hard getting used to the second one. Sometimes, when a new kid arrives and Kai will jump into a volcano to save him. Sometimes, when somebody dies and Kai forgets how he did ever get over this as a child. Sometimes, when someone comes back and everything’s changed and they make it work, somehow.

“Thank you for being okay,” Lloyd whispers. He looks up at him, eyes shining. “How do you feel?”

“Good. Less dizzy. I’m still sick but not feverish anymore. Magical tea did wonders.” He frowns, attempting to sit up and pull back a little from the hug. “I do think you should keep some distance though. I might not be lethal but I’m still cont—” He’s interrupted by Cole, who coughs into his fist.

All eyes shoot up in his direction and Kai pales.

Nya drops her head, her forehead hitting Lloyd’s back. “I told you this would happen.”

“I knew it,” and Kai would be pulling at his hair too if his hands were trapped by his siblings hugging him. “I fucking knew it. Get out of this room right now.”

Cole (who also looks pale, actually, now that he notices, the fucking idiot) reaches out, attempting feebly to press him back into the couch as Kai tries to get everybody off him and out of the room. “Kai. Kai. Kai, it’s fine. It’s fine, I knew too.”

“He didn’t tell you so that you wouldn’t worry,” Nya chimes in. “I said you’d find out anyway and freak the hell out but he wanted to see you. He’s been like this since lunch.”

“But we don’t know what it is!” Kai yells, and he’s so gonna kill Cole for making this irony possible. “What if it was my fire? What if I only got through because it’s mine? If it happens to you…”

“Wu said it wasn’t your fire,” Cole croaks. “Just a cold or something, remember? It was obviously gonna happen. Really. It’s fine.”

“We don’t know,” Kai pleads, horrified as he realizes he’s actually coming close to crying again. Jay, for a second, last night, was bad enough, but now, in front of the others, all of the others, Lloyd included…

“Kai. Buddy.” Cole gently pushes Zane back so that he can get to Kai, and takes both hands in his. Kai thinks, hysterically, that Cole is the best nurse in the world and Kai would be the worst, because he can’t tell what Cole’s temperature is, not with his body and his senses, but he knows it’s probably high. “I’m sorry. Sorry I kept scaring you the other night and I kept freaking out. It’s fine. I actually have a normal human fever. I may end up causing an earthquake or something, but I will be fine.”

“But you’re not fine,” Kai blinks through the tears that keep threatening to come out. “You were… you looked at me and you weren’t… you shouldn’t have to go through this.”

“Nobody should. But that’s not what scared me. It was that it was you.” He takes a deep breath, like what he just said just took a weight off his shoulders. “Or anyone else, for the matter. It’s always scary when it’s somebody else. When it’s me, then it’s fine…”

“No, it’s not!” he yells, frantically drying his eyes. “Stop it, Cole. Stop saying things, why won’t you guys just shut up when I ask you to…”

He’s doing it again, he realizes. They’re all probably staring at him lost and confused, because he’s just panicking and crying and trying not to cry in front of them. But he feels Nya’s hand rubbing on his back (this time it is Nya’s), and Cole’s hands as he pulls him close for a hug, and they’re not trembling anymore, despite (or because of) Cole being the one who’s sick this time.

“Okay,” he says in a low voice. “Okay. I’m sorry. We are sorry.” He presses Kai’s head against his chest. “It is fine. It’s not… It’s not like that. My mom. Everything that happened. And it’s not on you either. It’s just not. “

Nya leans in to whisper something. “This is part of it, remember? You and me.” She tugs at her brother’s arm. “It’s not just the two of us anymore.”

Family, it’s what she’s saying.

Being a big brother. The eldest. (Which he isn’t anymore, not with Zane and Cole.) Doesn’t always have to mean that. This is part of it too.

His breath evens, slowly, as he takes in Cole’s embrace and he feels him being okay. He realizes his arms are free and hugs him back, and he feels Cole relaxing as well.

He looks up at Jay, who’s sitting on the edge of the couch. “How did you not catch anything? You were here all night.”

Jay grins. “Walker’s immune system. Prepared for anything, from tetanus to weird Fire Elemental Flu. That is not actually a Fire thing,” he adds when Nya and Zane glare at him, “and will only manifest as a normal sickness now, so you will be okay.”

“Wu says…” Kai clears his throat, looking up to meet Cole’s eyes. “Wu says it has little to do with my powers. Like it manifests weirdly because of them but it’s mostly… it is just a fever. He said it happened to my dad a few times too. So.” He sniffs. “You should be fine.”

“Of course I’ll be,” Cole nods. He finds Kai’s hand and squeezes it. “Do you wanna talk about it? Your parents?”

The sudden request does take him aback, and Kai frowns at him with a glare. “Do you?”

Cole sinks into the couch with a sigh. “Okay, fair point, Hair Gel.”

Kai grabs a cushion to smash him with. “Hey, this thing is natural, what part of grew up poor in the middle of the countryside don’t you understand, you little privileged…”

“I wasn’t rich, I keep telling you, my dad isn’t that famous…”

“You kinda are rich by default, Mr Boarding School.”

“You went to a boarding school too! Okay, bad example…”

Jay snickers, putting down his phone with the pictures and drying his own eyes. “I think we should, though. You know, talk about stuff.” The others look at him and he flinches at their glares upon being met with the concept of therapy. “I mean, not now, obviously. We’re all… freaked out and crying and stupid…”

“Who’s crying?” Lloyd asks.

“Shut up, you runt,” he sniffs. “But we should talk about things. For real.”

Kai squints. “I think I’d rather die drowned.”

Nya turns to look at him. “Would you prefer for your inner psychological issues to be revealed only under the influence of possession or corruption done by an enchanted object?”

Kai buries his head in Cole’s chest again. Lloyd frantically tries to reach out to him. “Kai, stop, I told you it was fine, don’t cry…”

Zane hums, as Lloyd keeps attacking Kai with hugs and words of affirmation. “I believe it might be helpful. Especially if a situation like this were to happen again. These have been… some stressful couple of days, to say the least.”

“I don’t need a shrink,” Lloyd groans, squeezing Kai’s arm for lack of a real hug, as Cole refuses to let him go.

“Pixal agrees with Jay,” Zane adds.

Lloyd pales.

Nya shakes her head to herself. “Dammit, Pixal. We can’t argue with her.”

Kai sits up again, not actually crying. “You should still leave, though. You guys are still at risk of…”

“Too late.” Lloyd throws himself at him and wraps him in a hug again.

“Affirmative,” Zane agrees, doing the same despite the lack of space.

Nya stands on one end of the couch and Jay on the other. “Told you”, the latter smiles. “You’re just that lovable.”

“You are all idiots,” he says, managing to free a hand so that his sister can take part in the hug. She leans into the touch like they’re kids again.

“We love you too,” she whispers.