Chapter Text
Julian tip-toed past the weird robot dudes who were all screaming and shooting at each other, a glowing cube of what his brain computer was telling him was fuel in his arms.
He glanced over at where one robot dude was getting tackled by another and quickly looked away with a muttered, “What the fuck is going on?”
He’d been in this weird world for about a week now; had caused an international incident by flying around the globe, accidentally blew up a gas station when he was trying to figure out how the hell his weapons worked, and now realized that he was about to die because he didn’t realize that he needed to eat to live.
So, fuel. That he was stealing from these robot dudes who were trying to kill each other because why the hell not.
“Don’t be suspicious~ don’t be suspicious~” Julian sang quietly to himself as he sneakily jogged around the corner and out of sight, wondering how the fuck he hadn’t been spotted considering that he was huge, had wings and was fucking blue. “Don’t be suspicious~! Don’t be suspicious~!”
He stopped, looked around, and seeing no one, quickly lifted the cube to his mouth and drained it all in one go, watching as the warnings from his brain computer disappeared. “Nice.”
“Hey!” A voice shouted from right behind him.
“Jesus in a fucking shit basket!” Julian yelped and whirled around, cube raised up in preparation to yeet the damn thing at whoever managed to sneak up on him- only to blink when he realized that no one was there. “Eh?”
“Down here,” the voice said and Julian looked down to see a tiny yellow robot dude who had itty bitty horns on his head. The dude, seeing that he had his attention, straightened up and said, “Who’re you? I know you’re not Thundercracker since he’s fighting with Ironhide- and you’re not like any ‘con I’ve seen before either, and you also don’t have an insignia on your wings.” He then pointed at his face with a look of surprise. “And your optics are yellow- I’ve never seen a ‘bot with yellow optics before!”
“I’m nunya,” Julian said quickly as he hid the empty cube behind his back. It was his now, dammit.
“Nunya?” The tiny robot repeated. “That’s-”
“Nunya business,” Julian snickered as he turned and began to walk away. “I’m just a nobody- don’t mind me, dude. Go back to… fighting, or whatever it is you and the other robots are doing.”
“W-wait!”
Julian stopped and snorted when he felt the other smack into his leg with a loud tong. He turned to look down at where the dude was now rubbing at his face with a grimace. “What?”
“Will you tell me your name if I tell you mine?” The dude asked, looking up at him hopefully. “It’s not every day you see a new ‘bot after all.”
Julian huffed. “You can tell me your name if you want, but I ain’t gonna tell you mine.”
“Oh… okay,” he said, looking incredibly sad.
Julian suddenly felt like a raging asshole. Fucking shit.
He sighed and shoved the cube into his magic chest box and crouched down to look the dude in the eyes. “Listen, I don’t mean to be a dick about my name- but I’ve got reasons.”
Yeah, Julian thought. One of ‘em being that I didn’t give myself a fucking name. I blame the fact that I genuinely thought I was the only fucking robot plane dude on the planet.
“But you can tell me your name if you still want to,” Julian said with a shrug. Eh, I’ll figure out what to call myself later. “Better than me calling you dude and yellow robot guy all of the time.”
At that, the little dude grinned brightly. “Okay! My name is Bumblebee- oh, but my friends call me Bee.”
And then he stuck out his hand.
He’s so fucking small, Julian thought as he reached forward and shook it. “Nice to meet you… Bee?” He studied Bumblebee’s expression, and at the way it somehow lit up even more, he nodded to himself. “Yeah, nice to meet you, Bee. Sorry for almost braining you with the cube earlier. I was spooked, heh.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that!” Bumblebee said happily as he withdrew his hand. “It happens a lot when you’re a minibot.”
Julian stared at him. “That sucks.”
Bumblebee nodded, his smile noticeably dimmer. “A little, yeah.”
Julian reached over to pat him on the back. “If you ever need someone to come and punch a bitch, I will be more than happy to.”
Bumblebee choked and shook his head. “O-oh! No, no! It’s alright! I appreciate the thought though!”
Julian shrugged. “Eh, my offer is still open. Just let me know and I'll just-” he punched at the air with a fist, grinning at the laugh Bumblebee let out. “-right in the kisser!”
“Bumblebee!”
“It’s a decepticon! Shoot him!”
Julian watched as Bumblebee spun around in alarm as a whole troop of robots started charging towards them. “... they’re your friends, right?”
“Yeah,” Bumblebee said as he started waving his arms at the others. “Hey! Don’t shoot, he’s-!”
Julian stumbled backwards when a beam slammed into his chest, and he raised his arm to block the next shot only to watch with wide eyes as the beam ricocheted off of the metal there to smack into one of the robot dudes, sending him sprawling across the concrete with a pained shout.
Sick
“Heh, I think I’ll be taking off now, Bee,” Julian told the distressed minibot who turned to watch him as he stood up to his full height. “It was nice meeting you though.”
“B-but!” Bumblebee said as he tried to stand in front of him in an attempt to shield him from the blasts, though seeing as he only came up to Julian’s knee, it didn’t really do much.
Julian deflected another shot and reached down to poke Bumblebee on the head who looked up at him helplessly.
“Y’know what?” Julian said, grinning. “I think I am gonna tell you my name after all.”
“Really?!” Bumblebee said, his alarmed expression morphing into one of delight.
Winking, Julian leapt back and transformed, blasting off into the sky.
“My name is Ricochet!” Julian shouted back, laughing as he dodged the beams that were fired at him. “See you later, Bee!”
“Y-yeah!” Julian heard Bumblebee shout back. “See you!”
Man, what a day, Julian thought with amusement as he flew to the abandoned warehouse he’d been staying in.
“Got myself fuel, made a friend,” Julian said as he walked over to his makeshift hammock that he’d made out of all the tarps that had been lying around, and flopped onto it with a sigh. “And I even named myself. Look at me being proactive and shit, hell to the yeah.”
He stared up at the ceiling for a moment. “... wonder what I should do tomorrow?”