Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

When she first wakes she actually assumes her mother has returned to the Canvas and restored them all.

This assumption feels legitimized by her waking in the manor, tucked into bed and nowhere near the Reach where she had finally found rest.

Except…

Except, when she goes up to the garden she can see a glowing golden 33 painted on the Monolith's face.

She goes back downstairs.

She can hear humming even before she reaches the room she's seeking, and when she opens the door to Verso’s playroom she finds the withered form of her Maman sitting at the piano, swaying gently to an imagined melody.

Something has gone wrong.

She doesn't mention her confusion to Papa when he returns later, though he seems to sense her turmoil, which has him hovering and cuddling her close.

He seems to have no idea that anything has happened. He mentions that the newest expedition should be arriving within the next day or so.

Expedition 33.

Alicia Dessendre’s expedition.

The expedition that finally achieved her brother’s greatest desire.

The expedition doomed to fail their true goal from the very beginning, just as all the others had.

It takes nearly a full day, but it seems even after years apart, she still knows her brother well enough to find him on the Continent. She leaves the manor while Papa is scouting for the Expedition’s likely landing place and approaches Verso.

Verso acts unsurprised by her sudden presence, but his shoulders tense.

They stand silent as they both observe the other, until eventually his posture goes loose with exhaustion and he sighs.

“What are you doing here, Alicia?” He asks quietly, his eyes falling shut as he slumps against a tree behind him.

She sees no signs that he recalls what she does, he looks the same as he ever has. Tired, but no more than before 33. Worn down, but maintained enough to avoid most incidents… Wary, but not in the same way he was when they’d come to her at the Reacher.

She hums and finally reaches out to him.

He doesn’t move as she cups his cheek, swiping her thumb back and forth under his eye, moving again and again over the tail of the scar he shares with Papa. She remembers his words to her at 33’s camp, insisting she was beautiful, trying to coax off her masks.

Her sweet, foolish brother.

He hates the masks even as he clings constantly to his own.

Neither of them have ever managed to truly release them in all these decades.

Her, the daughter blamed and silenced. Him, the prodigal son.

He can never escape Verso, and she can never really be Alicia.

She hums again and this is the only mercy her mother has ever truly shown her. To be understood, to be known by her family, even in silence.

“What’s changed?” Her brother asks, in response to the words she cannot speak.

His arms open to her automatically, as soon as she steps forward, and she threads her arms around his waist. She sighs as she lays her head against his chest.

I’m tired of this.

“Yeah… me too,” he whispers, sorrow in his voice, laying his own head atop hers. He shudders with something like relief as he curls around her.

Her sad, everlost brother.

Her brother, who would give probably anything, to walk through the flames for her.

Her hallowed out brother, who she cannot help but love, no matter how many pieces he breaks himself into to try and fit the shape Maman traced him in.

Perhaps that is the true gift Maman gave her. Her family is her own, but she will never be Alicia.

You'll join them.

She doesn't make it a question, because she already knows the answer.

“Hopefully, if they allow it,” he says. She hums. “Renoir will be upset.”

She hums again but offers no words with it.

Fitting, I think, that they'll start where we ended.

She could tell him directly that they'll be at the beach, but maybe she is upset with him still.

“... there? Do they have a death wish?” He asks without expecting an answer, already exasperated with this latest bunch. She lifts her head enough to look at him and he rolls his eyes. “Yes, yes, you're hilarious… brat.”

She smiles under her mask and curls her fingers tighter against her brother’s back.

She still has no idea what's happening or what has happened, but she's going to find out.

And the answer will inevitably be found with Expedition 33.

Her brother expects her distant support and blessing, the same as she's given their father since that… unpleasantness with Expedition 56 she got mixed up in. One of the only times since their split that her brother and father had seen eye-to-eye.

But if there's one thing her family has taught her, intentionally or otherwise, it's that stories aren't led from the wings.

Her brother is an accomplished liar, to his own detriment, but lies only live so long as the truth is smothered.

Alicia is tired of her family's silence.

Her brother can read this story however he pleases, but it's their audience that will write its end.

She'll just have to see who gets to them first.

Chapter Text

She’s settled watchfully in the dark spaces of the beach, her family’s shadow even now, tracking Papa’s Chroma as it approaches the newly landed expedition and Verso’s as it carefully approaches from a side path.

She is no more innocent than the rest of her family, and though she has killed fewer people than her father and brother, she does not regret them the same way the pair of them do.

She mourns the loss of life, as they do, but she does not comfort herself with mercies or maybes. She has decided to let Papa lead the Noirs to them, when she may have been able to sway him, and that is a choice she will own.

It will be easier for her and Verso to join them if there are fewer of them.

She is not the liar her brother is, but silence makes lies so very easy and she will not cradle the guilt of that truth either.

She closes her eyes when they spot Papa and doesn’t reopen them until the screaming starts.

When she does she finds herself caught on the sight of the man Papa killed on the cliffs, the one Alicia smiled at with love and turned to every time she was scared, the man Verso allowed to die before stepping in.

She tilts her head as his group of four hide behind a boulder, voices hushed but panicked as they echo around her in this in-between space. Their movements are lethargic and stuttering, time always sludge-like here, and it gives her the ability to see as the Nevron approaches – drawn not by their voices but their rabbiting hearts.

This will be her first real choice then.

She steps free of the Chroma draped around her like a curtain, gives the expeditioners enough time to register her presence, and then cuts through the tendril swiftly creeping towards the unfamiliar, injured man at the end.

They all react to that.

“Putain!” Spits the man she saved, scrambling out of the way at the same time his companions reach out to pull him closer to them.

She steps between them and the Nevron, taking it down quickly and then turning back to the little group. Their weapons are finally drawn and they’re staring at her with wide, terrified eyes.

She tilts her head. They blink in confusion.

She points away from the battlefield, seeing the light of a Noir swiftly approaching from over the boulder.

“Wh-?” The other unfamiliar man starts to question, his sword-arm wavering.

She points again, then beckons them towards her before pointing a final time and turning away. She moves just quick enough to coax swiftness, but stays slow enough for them to follow despite the darkness of their surroundings.

She can hear a quiet, frantic argument behind her and pauses just out of sight for them to make their decision. Swift footsteps chase after her and she turns to see the little group hurrying towards her, eyes still darting all around for potential enemies. When they see her waiting they visibly untense a bit and speed up, so she feels reasonably confident they don’t currently mean to attack her.

Once they’ve caught up she leads them decisively forward, keeping them away from as much combat as she can. She recognizes the looks of shock and animal-panic on their faces, and she doesn’t care to surround herself with potential threats acting solely on adrenaline clouded minds.

This plan is challenged when a Noir emerges from the gloom in front of them, having clearly been laying in wait. She moves immediately between it and the expeditioners, slashing at it with a wave of raw Chroma, making the Nevron rattle agitatedly.

It advances with a building ball of light but a shot rings out from somewhere on her blind side, bursting the orb before it can be used. The woman in the little group surprises her by striding forward with a rifle in her hands, already aiming another shot.

The man she’d saved quickly steps up on the woman’s other side, a trio of jagged looking spheres hovers above one of his hands while he holds what seems to be a matching shield with the other.

With them focused on the Noir she looks over her shoulder to check on the other two behind them. She finds them both armed with swords as they watch the Noir and their companions, with Alicia’s man also holding a pistol.

She’s barely turned far enough to catch a glint at her peripheral, but when she turns her body fully away from the Noir she sees a hand reaching out from the shadows and immediately moves.

Alicia’s man is the only one truly in its path, so she lets her rapier dissipate and throws herself at the man, sending them both to the ground. The other man he’d been standing with immediately curses, and then curses even more violently when the Noir emerges after the hand, aiming to swipe at all three of them now.

The dark-skinned man quickly places himself between them as they scramble quickly to their feet, Alicia’s man curls his prosthetic hand around her bicep and drags them both back a step. He seems to instinctively tuck her behind him, which is sweet if largely useless, considering she’s likely more capable a fighter than him. The other man deflects an attack with some kind of Picto that forms a glowing shield around his free arm when he raises it and she pulls free to duck under the Chroma’s guard, thrusting her blade into its side and sending darkly pulsing Chroma through the wound.

It recoils with a shriek and the dark-skinned man quickly herds them both back towards the other two, who seem to have stunned their Noir somehow, giving her the chance to direct them away from both Nevrons.

Now that she knows they’ll follow her, she moves quicker, leading them swiftly towards the wreck of an old ship, long beached on its side.

“What are we doing?” The woman asks frantically, looking around for the answer and glancing quickly behind them for enemies.

She gestures again for them to follow her, hoping to soothe the anxiety immediately growing in them as they take in the dead end she seems to have led them to, all while Nevrons continue shrieking in the distance.

They follow more hesitantly as she begins scaling the old railing like a ladder.

She pauses at the top to wait for them, climbing confidently over the edge to crouch on the flat of the ship’s hull, idly noting the way they hesitate to join her for a moment.

She mimes silence once they’re close enough to see her, then points down into the gloom that obscures the rest of the ship, before promptly sliding over the edge.

She hears them gasp behind her when she drops, then hears another whispered argument. She rolls her eye as she gets to her feet after landing, but scans the area while they decide whether to follow or not. There are no Nevrons around so far as she can tell, even when she briefly dips into the dark spaces.

She hears the man with the Picto-shield say “-good enough for me,” and then comes the sound of him sliding down the old wood of the ship before he drops down. He quickly gets his feet under him, shoots her a shaky grin, and then turns to call quietly up to his companions.

“Still alive, now move it!”

She steps a bit farther away to give them more space as they each drop down.

“Everyone alright?” The man she saved asks afterwards, gaining shaky affirmatives from everyone but Alicia’s man, who’s breathing has gone wrong. “Gustave?”

His hand is pressed hard to his chest over his heart and he bends slightly at the waist, gasping for breath. This immediately panics his companions, who gather around him and each lay a hand on him somewhere.

The crowding doesn’t help but they seem incapable of doing anything else right now, which she supposes makes sense after the beach.

She lets herself feel the twinge of guilt and then moves on, crouching in front of the man so that she’s in his line of sight, his dazed eyes finding her sluggishly.

She reaches out slowly to keep his companions from reacting to any sudden movements and then pokes him in the nose.

He jerks back in surprise, all of them do actually, but his eyes clear a bit and his gasping briefly pauses.

She carefully pulls his hand from where it’s fisted in his uniform, briefly pinching the bare skin of his forearm to make him jolt again, his eyes further clearing as he frowns at her. The man that had convinced the rest of them to follow her down snaps his own hand out at that though, curling around her wrist as though to prevent any other pinches.

She stiffens at the touch but doesn’t pull away, instead pulling Gustave’s hand towards him. She briefly lets go to grasp his fingers, leading them to the other man’s wrist and pressing them down over where his pulse should be, which he seems to understand as he immediately shifts a little farther up.

She holds his eyes with her own and takes an exaggerated breath in, then pushes it out loudly so that it’s audible against her mask. She does this several more times before he manages to mimic her, his breathing steadily slowing until he closes his eyes and nods gratefully, letting go of the other man’s wrist.

He takes a deep breath and then straightens. “I’m okay. I’m- sorry, I don’t know- I- I’ll be alright…”

The man holding her wrist lets go once Gustave is standing, shooting her an apologetic look as she stands back up. “Sorry for grabbing you… What are we doing now?”

The question is directed towards his companions, though he glances towards her curiously.

She gestures them forward rather than let anyone respond, leading them swiftly away from the danger of the beach. Once she starts to see the liquid light pools she slows a bit, knowing they should be relatively free of danger for a while.

“Who are you?” Gustave asks her as the expeditioners all clump together again. “I mean- thank you, for helping us, but…”

She nods in understanding, hesitating a moment before crouching down and using a rock to carve a very ugly rendition of her name into the soft ground.

“Alicia?” The woman asks and she nods. “Can… I’m sorry if this is rude, but can you not speak?”

She shakes her head, offering them her rough hum as she presses her fingers against her covered throat.

“Well, thank you for your assistance, Alicia,” the man she’d saved says, extending a hand to her as though to help her stand, despite his other still being pressed to a wound on his shoulder.

She tilts her head curiously, watching all of them freeze as her fringe shifts enough they can probably see her empty eye, but she decides to accept the hand. He composes himself admirably and gently tugs her to her feet, shaking her hand once she’s standing.

“My name is Tristan,” he says, then introduces his companions in turn, who each shake her hand as well. She can’t suppress her amused smile and is grateful her mask covers it. “This is Margot, Gustave, and Lucien. As for what we do now, we should head for the Indigo Tree. Protocol states we’re to regroup there if separated or attacked.”

She hums, drawing their attention back to her, and she points towards the rocky outcroppings farther out.

“Can we get to the tree from here?” Margot asks.

She wobbles her hand in a so-so gesture.

“Is… there a path that gets us closer to the tree?” Lucien asks hesitantly and she nods, drawing a surprised smile from the man.

“Does that mean you can get us to the tree?” Margot asks but Alicia hesitates to nod this time, instead tilting her head again in a questioning gesture.

She presses her hand to her chest, then holds it out to each of them, hoping they’ll understand the question.

“... you can lead us there,” Gustave slowly guesses, pausing for her to nod before continuing. “But- are you asking if we want you too?”

She nods again more eagerly, pleased to be understood. She hums a low note, pointing back towards the beach, then pulls some of her hair forward to hold out.

“Do you know the man from the beach?” Tristan asks, taking a step forward. Not threatening really, but clearly intent.

She nods, knowing she’s walking a thin line between making herself trustworthy and making herself a threat.

“Who is he?” Lucien asks, then winces as he realizes how difficult that would be for her to answer.

“Are you with the man from the beach?” Gustave asks quietly, sounding wary but oddly gentle. She frowns, slowly offering another so-so gesture.

“What does that mean?” Margot asks, tense and frustrated. “I know you can’t just answer, but-”

The woman drags her hands over her face frustratedly.

“Oh!” Gustave’s sudden voice makes most of them flinch, but he hurriedly pulls up a storage Picto that deposits a leatherbound book into his hand, a Chroma-ink pen tied to the front. “Here.”

She accepts it hesitantly when she sees his name embossed on the front, offering him a questioning hum to make sure he’s certain.

“It’s alright, go ahead,” he encourages. “I don’t think my apprentices will mind.”

She handles the journal with care regardless, sensing the importance of it to him, and opens it to the last page rather than the first.

"The man's name is Renoir. He's my father."

Chapter Text

“The man’s name is Renoir. He’s my father.”

She leaves it at that for now, turning it to the expeditioners and letting them absorb the words.

There’s a lot of cursing and agitated pacing. She keeps still to avoid provoking them, clutching the journal to her chest and waiting to see what they decide.

She hasn’t been this close to any expeditions since-

“Why did he attack us?” Lucien demands.

“Are you with him?” Tristan asks warily.

She slowly reopens the book, only looking away when she’s sure they’re going to wait for her answer before doing anything.

“Those are both complicated answers. I don’t wish to hurt any of you and I would do my best to protect you if he found you. Would you like the full answers now or would you rather I bring you to the tree and then answer?”

She pauses but before turning the book she adds, “Or I can show you how to get to the tree and leave you be?”

She gives the book back to Gustave instead, tucking her hands behind her as she waits for them to read.

She thinks this will be one of the moments that decides whether she will ultimately be successful or not in her goal.

The group shares a look with each other.

“I don’t want to linger here…” Tristan offers, gaining nods from Lucien and Margot, but Gustave turns back to her with a considering look.

“How… old are you, Alicia?” He asks hesitantly, then flushes when he sees her brows raise. “Sorry, you just- you’re very small, but I didn’t mean-”

She holds her hands out for the journal, which he returns easily.

“That’s part of the complicated answer, but for the purpose of your question I’m 17.” She hesitates for a moment, glancing at him where he’s waiting attentively… and possibly trying to read what she’s writing despite it being upside down. “I’ve always been small. My family has… difficulties changing. Physically.”

He blinks down at the words after she hands his journal back. “Difficulties?”

She shrugs.

Gustave lets the others read her words, drawing more confusion.

“I think we should take the help,” Lucien offers, rocking back and forth on his heels. “We can always part ways at the tree?”

She nods in agreement and eventually the whole group agrees, so after they tend to Tristan’s injuries she begins leading them forward. It’s impressive that he’s the only one with any serious damage from the beach, but the bleeding is easily stopped with a healing tint.

They all walk in silence for a long while as she easily navigates the rocky environment. Tristan walks beside her, thankfully on her good side, while the other three trail behind them.

She watches them take in the melancholy scenery from the corner of her eye, sees Margot staring at the lightfalls with something a little awed, sees Gustave studying the remains of ruined buildings as she guides them up a worn stone staircase that has long since begun being devoured by the cliffs around it.

Eventually quiet conversation picks up, prompted by Lucien. Little comments and observations, questions between the expeditioners of things she doesn’t have context for.

“How many people do you think… made it?” Gustave finally asks, voice tight.

This question is one that invites Alicia’s participation after the others all hesitate.

It also offers her an opportunity she hadn’t considered until that moment.

She glances back and Gustave blinks before summoning his journal again.

She doesn’t want to waste too much time here, so she decides to take a chance on them.

Before taking the book she holds her hand out to Tristan expectantly.

The man blinks at her, slowly taking her hand. She guides it up to her shoulder, pressing down until he carefully takes hold of her, then she points forcefully forward before curving left.

“Keep straight until we can go left?” Tristan asks. She nods then finally turns to take the journal, when she turns back she pointedly moves forward while holding Tristan’s hand to her shoulder. “Am I- am I leading you while you write? I thought you wanted to wait to explain until the tree?”

She opens the journal to the page she’d been writing on and points to the line about complicated answers, then holds her thumb and finger far apart. When he confusedly nods she points to Gustave, then moves her fingers until they’re only barely open.

“Gustave’s question is… shorter or- or smaller than the others?” Margot translates. Alicia nods, turning her attention to the journal and hoping Tristan is polite enough not to guide her off a ledge.

“I don’t know how many of your expedition survived, but my brother was there as well. I saw him protecting a girl that was knocked out by one of the blasts. I lost sight of him when he was moving her out of the way, but perhaps he was able to help some others?”

“Girl?!” Gustave repeats, catching on the words she suspected he would. “Maelle… I- I think I saw him, but- I thought- My head was spinning from the blast and then Lucien was there, I thought I must have imagined that… You said he’s your brother?”

She nods, then decides to add, “Verso is not with Papa. They disagree on most things. Verso wouldn’t let him hurt Maelle(?) if they’re together.”

She can see nearly all of the tension the man had been carrying immediately melt away with relief, to the point Lucien takes hold of his elbow before he can stumble.

“Hey, Maelle knows the protocols too,” Lucien says softly, clearly trying to further reassure the man. “If this Verso got her out of there like Alicia did with us, Maelle would know to head for the Indigo Tree.”

Gustave nods, reaching over to squeeze the hand holding him steadily. He hesitates a moment before reaching out and squeezing her opposite shoulder with a quiet thank you. She’s surprised that she doesn’t tense when he touches her out of her sight.

She hesitates to hand the journal back, deciding to risk a question of her own.

“Your sister?” She gives it back after asking, not wanting to push just yet. As soon as she does Tristan releases her shoulder, but she catches his hand to offer him her own squeeze in thanks.

“Yes,” Gustave answers after reading.

“Sister, daughter, sister-daughter,” Lucien teases, which gets Gustave’s elbow digging into his side in return, but the man just snickers.

“Let’s just get to the tree,” Gustave insists.

Alicia’s heart clenches, wondering how true Lucien’s playful words are, but she leads them forwards regardless.

Probably an hour or two since leaving the beach the sound of real rushing water can be heard somewhere ahead of them. The expeditioners all perk up at the sound of something other than their own steps and distant shrieks.

“Is… Is that a waterfall?” Tristan asks and she nods as they step into a stone tunnel.

They grimace a bit when she eventually leads them through the waterfall. All but Lucien who takes the chance to scrub some of the filth off his face.

She gently catches his elbow and tugs, startling him a bit, but she points forward and then mimes splashing her face. She sees the understanding dawn on his face and he lets himself be led along with the others.

She makes a short hop down, into the shallow pond that the fall drains into, then moves to the little shore nearby.

“Brilliant,” Lucien announces cheerfully, crouching beside her and washing his face clean. The others eagerly follow his lead, especially Gustave, who in full light seems to have gotten especially filthy.

“Is the tree far from here?” Margot asks afterwards, squeezing water from her hair. Alicia shakes her head and points behind them. “Just follow the sort-of-path then?”

She nods in agreement, beckoning them to follow. They encounter only two Nevrons that are easily dispatched, and Gustave happily explains his Lumina Converter to her after she makes a noise of surprise when the first Nevron dissipates.

It’s a fascinating innovation and she can see why this expedition was so successful previously, despite their heavy losses.

They start finding bodies not long after and it seems many of their expedition actually did make it off the beach, but they didn’t survive long beyond it.

She’s seen these traps in other places, though she’s never seen the Nevron responsible for weaving the webs ensnaring the fallen members of Expedition 33. It seems to prefer these Chroma traps to attacking directly.

It is a harrowing sight and the surviving expeditioners are grim and shaken as they take in the sights around them.

She crouches beside a tangle of webs and hovers her hand over the dripping, viscous blood. This happened not long ago then.

“No.” Lucien’s gutted whisper pulls her attention back to the group.

The man falls to his knees and she quickly rejoins them. As she approaches she sees a bloodied woman skewered against the largest mound of Chroma-bound bodies. She’s died recently enough that her Chroma has yet to harden and she stares forward with unseeing eyes.

“Catherine,” Gustave whispers as he stares at the woman with wide, upset eyes, then crouches down beside Lucien and hesitantly reaches out to the man. “Luc-”

Lucien doesn’t wait for him to speak, he takes Gustave’s hand and pulls him close at the same time he tips limply against the other man. Gustave immediately hugs the man, going to his knees so he can press closer.

Margot is almost angrily scrubbing at her eyes as she turns away sharply. Tristan swallows roughly but his face is blank as he looks around at the gore surrounding them.

“What is this?” He quietly asks her, while Lucien weeps quietly against Gustave’s shoulder.

She hesitates a moment before crouching down, using her finger to write on the dusty ground. Tristan crouches beside her to read it.

“Nevron. Never seen before. Seen other webs like this though. They trap. Form Chroma-sinks that draw other Nevrons. End up herding their prey to the trap. Don’t know why. Very dangerous. Don’t touch it even now.”

He nods in understanding. “She says not to touch anything, and be careful for-”

He’s cut off by the sound of a voice calling out from another passage in the cave.

“Hello?!” It sounds like a woman and clearly a familiar one, based on the way Tristan and Gustave instantly perk up, hope naked in their expressions.

A slight woman with dark hair and some kind of small script tattooed down one side of her face appears from around one of the mounds, her eyes wide as she takes in the cave. Alicia blinks in surprise at the sight of her bare feet before tilting her head curiously at the sight of more tattoos covering her feet and what’s visible of her legs, along with her bare left arm. They glint gold in the shifting light of the cave and Alicia can distantly feel the pulse of Chroma from the woman, despite the lack of a visual usage of it.

Gustave still holds Lucien close, but Tristan hurries to the woman’s side. “Lune!”

Her expression goes immediately slack with relief when she sees him and the others behind him.

“Trist-” She starts to say his name in return, her voice soft, but she’s cut off by the man immediately dragging her into his arms.

“I’m so glad you made it,” the man whispers, and this seems to be what coaxes the woman’s arms around him in turn. They hold each other for a long moment before the woman pulls away.

“We shouldn’t linger,” she says. Alicia watches as she straightens her shoulders, the action seemingly pulling her together as her expression turns firm and determined. “We need to get to the Indigo Tree, there may be more-”

This is when she finally catches sight of Alicia where she’s still crouched. They blink at each other.

“What?” She asks the group at large.

“This is Alicia,” Margot introduces for her. “She pulled us off the beach. She knows where the tree is and she offered to explain some things when we get there. Like telling us about her father, Renoir, the man that attacked us on the beach.”

“This is Lune,” Tristan introduces in turn, and Alicia nods to her in acknowledgement.

Lune only stares at her intently, looking like she’s trying to unravel the mystery of her already. Alicia suspects this woman will be one to take care around.

She decides to throw in a wave of greeting as well.

That makes Lune blink and pulls a snort from Margot.

“Right… I take it you don’t speak?” She guesses, eyeing the words Alicia had written on the ground with interest as she immediately looks around at the ‘webs’ she’d mentioned. “Why? Does it have to do with the mask?”

“Lune,” Gustave immediately chides, sounding vaguely aghast. “You shouldn’t just ask people things like that.”

The offense on her behalf makes her smile with amusement and also manages to draw a wet little giggle from Lucien where he’s still slumped against the man.

Lune takes in the sight of them in front of the woman Gustave had called Catherine with a mournful expression.

“I didn’t mean to offend,” the woman offers, though she notably doesn’t retract the question. Alicia tilts her head in consideration.

She thinks she likes the woman’s bluntness.

“The mask conceals.” She writes, watching Lune immediately step closer to watch her. She pauses before continuing, when Gustave manages to fish out his journal again for her, likely noting the more blunt way she wrote in the dirt. She accepts it with a nod of thanks. “My face used to make people uncomfortable, when there were people to see it. It’s largely a comfortable habit to still wear it now, I suppose… there was a fire a long, long time ago.”

She looks up at Lune as she also crouches, offering the journal to her and then decides to sweep her fringe back herself, going so far as to tuck her hair behind her ear on her blind side. The woman’s eyes track intently over her face, though notably without any sign of judgement, before she nods, looking down to the journal to also read the things she’d previously written.

The other expeditioners’ breaths catch at the clearer view of not only her empty socket, but also the gnarled scar tissue creeping up her cheek and around her missing eye.

“You… You’re colorless,” Margot notes in surprise. “Even your iris, it’s nearly white.”

She decides to give into the bitter impulse she feels at the observation, ducking her head a little as she retrieves the journal.

“You’ll find that many of the broken, discarded things on the Continent lack colors of their own. The tree isn’t far, we should continue before any Nevrons come to investigate the Chroma here.”

She presses the book back into Lune’s slightly startled hands and then stands, walking away as the others hesitantly crowd around the woman to read along with her.

She’s never acknowledged the thought before. It aches like a lanced wound.

She wonders if sharing the thought was the right choice.

Chapter Text

They stand just inside the shattered wall of the house they passed through and Alicia watches the way the expeditioners stare out at the environment in quiet awe.

“It’s so…” Tristan’s voice trails off quietly.

“Yeah. It’s almost unfair, something so beautiful wanting us dead so badly,” Lucien comments, a touch bitter even as he stares out at the swirling skies with soft eyes. It’s the first time he’s spoken since they left the cave.

As they’d walked Gustave had very kindly explained to her in a whisper, that Catherine was Lucien’s best friend. That they had been nearly joined at the hip from the moment they met in training.

He’d spoken wistfully, watching the man with soft, sad eyes. Alicia responded with a mournful hum, tentatively squeezing his wrist in both sympathy for their loss and thanks for his consideration.

He’d offered her a tired smile before focusing once more on Lucien. They didn’t speak, but Lucien would occasionally lean into the man as they walked and Gustave pressed back every time.

It was so very humanizing, to see the obvious connections and care between each person in the little group. The histories and lives playing out before her eyes.

They find one of those strange, broken Nevrons not far from the tree and Lune looks at her appraisingly as it speaks, likely recalling what she’d written earlier. She doesn’t meet the woman’s eyes, just watches sadly as the Jar expresses its jubilance upon acquiring its requested light and then its disappointment upon the flame guttering out.

Gustave and Margot remain wary of the white Nevron, though they seem to trust her nonreaction as a good sign. Lune and Gustave are nearly radiant upon finding a journal from expedition 81 though.

The group quietly discusses the Nevron’s Mistress and the Paintress, debating what the information could mean. She doesn’t offer up any interruptions or corrections.

The conversation is immediately halted when they hear the sound of a flare and they all rush out of the crevasse to see the pink-red light of an expedition emergency flare.

“Survivors, we have to hurry!” Margot rushes forward with the words and they follow immediately.

Alcicia keeps on guard, knowing there are a number of Nevrons that linger in this area.

It’s this watchfulness that lets her spot it first.

She grabs Lucien’s sleeve with a grunt, pulling his attention to her, and then surges past him.

“Léo!” Gustave shouts, catching the attention of the man running.

Lucien had followed her forward and now throws himself in front of the man, bringing up his Picto shield as he does.

He manages all of this just in time for the shield to protect them both from a flurry of roots that slam against its surface. The shield shatters under the onslaught but it holds for long enough that Léo can pull them both to their feet and stumble back towards the group.

Margot, who seems to have been following Alicia with her eyes, raises her rifle towards the Nevron Alicia is sprinting towards as it fully emerges from the surrounding trees.

It cries out with a discordant tune, flying down towards them all.

“Fuck!” Lucien and Lune both shout, the entire group diving forward as sharp roots erupt from the ground behind them, blocking off the way back.

The spikes glow with pulsing Chroma at the same time Alicia slams her rapier into the Évêque, her own Chroma surging through in a burst. As soon as she dances out of its reach Margot shoots, wisely aiming for the swirling ball of Chroma in its chest.

The Évêque shrieks, making everyone cringe at the sharp sound. Margot’s only response is firing again and this time one of Tristan’s sharp, spinning spheres joins the shot.

The fight is hard but quick, with so many people contributing. By the time the Évêque is dissipating into particles and being absorbed by the Lumina Converter they’re all breathing harshly.

“Let’s… Let’s get up into the tree, it will be safer,” Lune suggests, straightening up and already striding towards the tree, with most of the group quickly following.

Everyone, but Gustave especially, is upset to find no one else present, until Lune finds a note Alicia is confident was left by Verso.

“Took Maelle to the weird corals,” she reads with a frown. “Look for a door inside a hut… it isn’t signed, who left this?”

“Alicia, you said you saw your brother with her, didn’t you? Could this be from him?” Gustave asks, his voice is the most energetic she’s heard it, and a frenetic energy practically radiates off of him.

She nods, watching him light up and turn to read the message for himself.

“Brother?” Lune asks with a frown.

“I think now’s the time for that discussion,” Margot suggests, getting nods from Tristan and Lucien. Gustave looks a little displeased as he glances at the message, but reluctantly agrees with a sigh and summons his journal once more.

She takes the book and sits down cross-legged.

This is the moment that will make or break her goals. How much to tell them?

“My brother, father and older sister were part of the first expedition, Expedition 0.”

She decides to start at the beginning and moderate from there, depending on how they react. She tries not to stiffen too much as they crowd around at her back so they can see as she writes. She shoots Margot a grateful look when the woman gently tugs their newly retrieved companion (whom she still hasn’t actually been introduced to) away from her blindside.

There are immediate noises of shock when they read her first line, but she’s grateful no one speaks yet.

“My mother was one of those lost during the Fracture, so once Lumière was secured, they were eager to look for her. Their expedition made it to the Monolith, where they discovered an impenetrable barrier and were forced to flee. My sister was lost, the rest of my family was… changed, and they returned to Lumière. But the people grew distrustful when they couldn’t explain what happened, so Papa brought us back here – our home was in one of the few places that wasn’t ripped into by the Fracture, not that much else has survived since the Nevrons moved in.

“Search and rescue had continued trying to find people, so Papa and Verso rejoined them, and that’s when we learned what the Paintress had done. Verso took a blow for one of his team and was killed – except he didn’t die. The Paintress had made us immortal. We can’t die – our injuries heal, no matter how serious, and we never change. We’re frozen exactly as we were 67 years ago.”

She pauses there to let them read everything, then taps her former line about her ‘complicated answer’ before putting the pen back to the page. She determinedly doesn’t look back to check their expressions yet.

“You asked why Papa attacked you; he kills the expeditions for the Paintress, so that he won’t lose anymore of our family. You saw the white Nevron from before, that spoke of its purpose? My sister was destroyed by its Mistress, for being an ‘imperfect’ creation, like the Nevron. You’ve already seen some of my own imperfections; when our hair turned white not long after leaving Lumière, the color fled from me completely. Verso was betrayed by his expedition companions; people he had known for years, all because he lived where he should have died – If Papa protects the Paintress, he protects the means of our immortality, and therefore our lives. Verso and I don’t want to be immortal though, we don’t want this ‘life’.”

Here she pauses again, her hand shaking for a moment as she forces herself to take a deep breath in and out. A bony hand lands on her shoulder and she jerks, turning to see Gustave holding her with his prosthetic. His expression is encouraging and his touch surprisingly grounding. She briefly raises her own hand to his, squeezing it in thanks, then goes back to the journal.

“There’s nothing my brother wants more than an end now, after all these years. He and Papa have fought viciously because of it, so I can promise he isn’t with him. I also want an end to all of this, but I’m more open to the definitions of ending than Verso is. I stood with my father in his desire to protect us for a long time. I’ve never attacked an expedition, but neither have I stopped him… I didn’t stop him from attacking yours, and I don’t know if I could have. I’m sorry. If you ask me to leave you, I’ll respect your wishes. I’m going to step away to let you speak alone, but if you have more questions I’ll answer them the best I can.”

She gently gives the journal back to Gustave, carefully standing up and moving away from the group as they now crowd around him instead. They shoot her conflicted looks as she walks down the path, still within their sight, but far enough they can speak without her.

Everything is in their hands now.

Chapter Text

She sits with her legs hanging over the edge of the massive tree bough, twisting her hands in her lap nervously.

“Alicia?” Margot calls hesitantly.

She breathes deeply and then gets up to rejoin them. She pauses after a few steps though, considering, and then reaches up to carefully pull her mask away.

“You don’t need-” Gustave starts to say, making her pause to look up at him. “If you’re removing your mask for our comfort or to placate us- if taking it off will make you uncomfortable, you don’t have to. None of us will judge you for your scars, but we also aren’t going to force you to remove something that makes you feel safer.”

She blinks, the words replaying in her mind. She feels oddly choked by them but she manages to nod, still choosing to pull the porcelain away from her face, feeling the Chroma that holds it in place briefly tickle over her skin like static before the connection breaks.

She cradles it in her hands as she walks the rest of the way to the expeditioners.

“Merde, you really do look like a teenager,” the new man comments, seemingly without thought as he immediately winces, rubbing the back of his neck with chagrin. “Er… I’m Léo by the way. Thank you for uh, helping save me earlier.”

She blinks but nods slowly in acknowledgement.

“We’ve all talked and we’d like to ask some other questions, especially about the Fracture and what you know about the Paintress,” Gustave explains. “But right now the most important thing is, will you help us reach the Paintress?”

With the question he holds out his journal, like an offering.

She takes it, holding out her mask in exchange. It feels strangely reassuring to see the way Gustave holds it so carefully.

“Yes. I want my family to be able to live again and I want to stop the Gommages.”

“Will you do your best to stop your father from killing us if he comes back?” Lucien asks, then holds up a hand to stop her before she can reply. “We understand if you aren’t able to fight him- He is your father, and you’ve certainly known him longer than us. But can you promise to try and talk him down, or at least get us a chance to get the fuck away from him?”

She’s once more touched by the consideration in the words and she nods before even putting the pen back to the paper. “Yes. I’ll do everything I can to protect you.”

“Then we’d like you to continue accompanying us,” Lune says decisively.

“We’ll wait to ask our other questions until we make a proper camp and get some sleep though,” Tristan adds, shooting Lune a pointed look.

Alicia nods, offering them a tentative smile as she clutches Gustave’s journal. They all seem more relaxed than before.

“Well, now that we’ve got that settled, can you tell us how to get to these ‘weird corals’ your brother mentioned?” Gustave asks, some of his previous frenetic energy returning.

Lune makes a sound of annoyance. “Gustave-”

“I’m sorry, but I will not wait,” Gustave immediately denies.

“Protocol is to wait three days at the rally point for any other-”

“We’ve already been here a while and we’ve seen no signs of anyone else!” Gustave disputes. “Léo said he hadn’t seen or heard anyone else before us either. If you want to wait then you should, but I can’t, Lune… Maelle may have chosen to come, but I’m still her guardian. I have a responsibility to her just as much as to the Expedition.”

“… I don't like this,” Lune says, moving agitatedly back towards Verso’s message.

“Neither do I,” Margot agrees, glaring at Lucien and Léo when they open their mouths to say something. “It feels like tempting fate to split up, like we're daring the universe to do something else.”

“I'm sorry, but I can't stay here when I know Maelle is somewhere else.” Gustave does seem sympathetic, but he's also taut with this restless energy that makes him seem liable to walk off any second. “What if something happened that made them leave? Why else wouldn't Maelle have been the one to write or sign the message?”

“You're sure this was left by your brother?” Lune asks her. Alicia nods. “And your father couldn't copy his handwriting?”

She makes a face, simply writing– “Verso has pianist handwriting.”

Lune makes an understanding noise but all the others just look confused.

“Pianist handwriting?” Lucien asks in a whisper. Margot shrugs.

“So… We’re all going with Gustave, right?” Léo finally asks after several silent minutes of everyone looking between Lune and Gustave.

Lune sighs explosively, dragging her hands over her face as she curses. “Yes.”

Alicia turns the journal towards the group, already having expected this result.

“Flying Waters isn’t too far. If we camp here for the rest of the night we’ll still get there by probably midday tomorrow. That will give you a little more time to wait for more survivors too.”

Gustave makes a noise of displeasure but ultimately agrees to the practicalities of the suggestion and the group backtracks a bit to set up a makeshift camp within the thicker part of the tree.

A watch pattern is decided on and people begin settling down, slowly passing around a few rations.

Alicia still has the journal for now and she rolls the pen over the cover as she considers her proposition.

“I’d like to go back to the beach while you all rest. I can check for any of your friends and hopefully get to your supplies before the Nevrons.”

Gustave especially double-takes when he reads the words. “Wait, what?”

“That seems like a terrible idea?” Léo objects.

“I’m very good at not being seen. You don’t need to worry.”

She doesn’t seem to be reassuring them but they also can’t seem to come up with any good reasons for her not to, so in the end she trades his journal back to Gustave for her mask, and then heads back the way they came.

Once she’s out of sight she simply steps into the Chroma void, not having to worry about her new travelling companions now. She’s back at the beach in a breath and quickly starts her search.

She feels lighter, now that she’s secured her place in the expedition and begun fostering their trust. If she can find the supplies they’d brought with them she’ll earn even more.

It’s been a long time since she’s felt this determined, let alone hopeful.