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Pinching his shirt over his chest with two fingers, Jaehyun fans himself as warmth continues to creep up his neck. Sweat just barely forms on his forehead, and he frowns to himself as he wipes it away with the back of his shirt sleeve. The NCT Night Night studio usually runs relatively cool, so he doesn’t understand why it’s so warm in here today. Getting through the recording of tonight’s episode has been a pain with Jaehyun distracted by the uncomfortable temperature, so he’s thankful that no one was scheduled to be in the guest seat with them.
”Are you okay?” Johnny asks beside him as the two stand up to stretch during an ad break. “Are you sick?”
”No, it’s just so hot in here,” Jaehyun pouts.
”It’s not, though,” Johnny says with worry. “Are you sure you’re not sick?” He places the back of his hand on Jaehyun’s forehead to check his temperature, and his frown only deepens. “You’re hot.“
Jaehyun shivers at Johnny’s touch. There’s a soft scent that reminds Jaehyun of a crackling bonfire that wafts off Johnny as concern for Jaehyun takes over his emotions, and it actually works wonders to calm Jaehyun down. Johnny is tactile, always free with his affectionate, friendly touches to their group mates and friends when they’re together, and exuding small bursts of something crisp and calming into the air around him.
“Are you sure you’re okay to keep going?” Johnny asks. “We can call it here.”
Jaehyun shakes his head. “I don’t want to worry anyone,” he replies softly.
“Okay, but say the word, and we can end early,” Johnny reassures with another pat on the shoulder, but this time, the hand skims down Jaehyun’s back, inducing another shiver even though his skin seems to burn under his clothes.
The duo retakes their seats and pulls on their headphones to start the next segment of the show. Jaehyun looks down at the script they’re supposed to read for a short skit. The edges appear a little fuzzy, and he squints to try to get them in focus. He chose glasses over contacts tonight, but he still should be able to see perfectly well with them on. Between the warmth curling in his body and the fog settling in his head, Jaehyun manages to stumble over words only twice as he reads, but it’s still unusual for him. Johnny shoots him a concerned glance in between lines. Jaehyun gives him a small smile in return, hoping it’s reassuring.
As soon as the next song starts, Johnny pushes off one ear of the headset. “Jaehyun-ah, are you sure you’re okay?” he asks.
“Is everything alright?” their producer asks from the other side of the studio, mirroring Johnny’s worry.
“I’m fine.”
“I think Jaehyun is sick.”
The two speak at the same time, and their producer sighs. “Okay, which is it?”
“I’m fine,” Jaehyun eagerly tries to assure everyone. “I’m maybe just a little tired. I’ll get more sleep tonight.” Their managers are on the other side of the studio in the production room, frowning at them. Jaehyun shoots them a thumbs-up in hopes it conveys high spirits, but it makes Johnny laugh. “What?” Jaehyun asks him.
“You can be so…” Johnny pauses to laugh, and he reaches over to pinch Jaehyun’s cheek. “Cute.”
It’s not the first time he’s done this, and he is bound to do it again as well. Jaehyun’s cheeks heat, but it’s for a reason unrelated to whatever is going on with his body right now.
He likes it when Johnny compliments him. He likes it when Johnny centers all his attention on him, especially when he’s the only one in the group who hears and laughs at a small joke that Jaehyun makes. He likes that Johnny sleeps a few feet away from him, usually shirtless, and Jaehyun can admire him for a couple of minutes before Johnny stirs awake in the morning. He likes that Johnny’s taller than Jaehyun and has to bend down to whisper in his ear when they’re sharing words between them when out in public or with the other members. He likes Johnny.
“Hyungie,” Jaehyun pouts at him, which only makes Johnny laugh and call him cute again.
Just that burst of a moment with Johnny, and the gentle, comforting scent still twirling off the other man, picks Jaehyun back up, and he manages to make it through more of the show without incident. He acclimates to the heat, pushing his sleeves back and unbuttoning his shirt slightly to allow more airflow.
They have just 15 minutes left when there’s a sudden sweeping fire that takes over Jaehyun’s body—overwhelming and just on the side of slightly painful—and it makes him cry out in surprise. It’s thankfully during the final ad break, so it doesn’t go out on air. Johnny’s eyes go wide before he jumps up to cross the short distance between them.
“We’re done,” Johnny says pointedly through the window into the production studio, knowing they can hear them. He uses a commanding tone that Jaehyun hasn’t heard from Johnny before, and it makes him tremble and press into Johnny’s side involuntarily. Still, Jaehyun doesn’t mind the sturdy presence of Johnny beside him.
“Johnny hyung,” Jaehyun says quietly. “I don’t feel well.”
Johnny tsks. “I know, Jaehyunnie. Let’s get you home.”
Jaehyun doesn’t know how the broadcast ends because all he can focus on is the way Johnny stays close to his side, picking up both their bags and slinging them on his back as he helps maneuver Jaehyun out of the studio. Jaehyun’s manager starts to fuss over him as well, but he avoids him in favor of pressing against Johnny.
“It’s okay,” Johnny says calmly. “I’ll watch over him tonight, and I’ll let you know if anything happens.”
“You’re responsible for him, Johnny-ya,” Jaehyun’s manager tells him in a scolding tone, one they’re more than used to hearing.
“I know,” Johnny nods.
When they get into the car to return to the dorms, Jaehyun rests his head on Johnny’s shoulder and closes his eyes. This isn’t new for them.
“How are you feeling?” Johnny asks again.
“A little better,” Jaehyun answers. He badly wants to press his nose right into Johnny’s neck and breathe, but he doesn’t like that there are others in the car. Jaehyun wants Johnny for himself.
“Good,” Johnny nods, and he places a hand on Jaehyun’s thigh, his thumb rubbing across the denim covering his skin. “Just close your eyes, I’ll let you know when we get home.”
“Okay,” Jaehyun whispers.
Jaehyun knows that his eyes were bound to drift closed like this anyway, but there’s a more profound yearning in Jaehyun’s core that makes him want to do so just because Johnny told him to. He wants to do what will make Johnny happy. As he sits there, breathing in the soft scent of Johnny’s warmth while trying to ignore how hot he’s starting to feel again, Jaehyun’s mind goes blissfully blank until Johnny’s hand begins to slide up and down his leg in a gesture meant to be calming. Jaehyun hums contentedly at the touch, but then an image flashes in Jaehyun’s brain of Johnny doing this to Jaehyun’s bare legs—Johnny running a hand up Jaehyun’s thigh to spread his legs for him on a bed.
This is also far from the first time Jaehyun has had thoughts along these lines about Johnny. Thoughts and fantasies began during their trainee days, when he found the other boy handsome on the day they met, and have only evolved since then. He’s never told anyone about these daydreams, and of course not Johnny, so Jaehyun simply deals with them himself. Admittedly, hiding turned more difficult since the two started living together. Jaehyun tries not to let the fantasies wander into his head when he’s in proximity to Johnny, but he can’t stop them now. His core aches, needy and desperate at the thought that there’s just a layer of cloth between Johnny’s hand and Jaehyun’s bare skin. The whine slips out of Jaehyun’s lips unbidden, and he regrets it as soon as the sound escapes. Johnny’s hand leaves his thigh, and it makes Jaehyun whine again.
“Do you feel worse?” Johnny asks quietly.
“Just wanna lie down,” Jaehyun mumbles. “Bed.”
“Okay,” Johnny answers softly. “We’ll be home soon.”
Blessedly, Johnny’s hand returns to Jaehyun’s thigh and offers a gentle comfort that keeps him as close to grounded as he can be until the car pulls up in front of their building.
“Are you sure you can take care of him?” This time, it’s Johnny’s manager offering doubt.
“I am,” Johnny replies, slightly annoyed.
“I don’t know…” Jaehyun’s manager expresses his concern again.
When Johnny opens the door and tries to extricate himself from Jaehyun to get out of the car, Jaehyun grabs at him and whines again, not wanting to be apart yet.
“See,” Johnny says. “He just wants me here to help. It’s fine.”
There’s no more argument after that as Jaehyun allows Johnny to help him out of the car. Something about being so close to home and with Johnny at his side clears Jaehyun’s brain up from the haze that had taken over for most of the car ride. He stands next to Johnny, shoulder to shoulder, as Johnny once again takes both of their bags. Before they can leave the car and enter the building, their managers step out and approach them, sizing them up.
“You’ve both been taking the required doses, correct?” Johnny’s manager asks.
“We have,” Johnny nods.
“Jaehyun-ah,” Jaehyun’s manager says, “You have been as well?”
“Yes,” Jaehyun answers, nodding.
Annoyance prickles up his spine at being asked such a question, even though he knows it’s part of their job to make sure none of the members ever reveal their secondary type. Jaehyun vividly remembers the long lecture from his trainee days, when the company employee instructed them to keep this information confidential and conceal any trace of it. Medications to prevent secondary attributes from presenting were administered to them from the first day they set foot in the company as trainees. Apparently, it maintained an allure to idols, allowing fans to imagine them however they wanted. Jaehyun still remembers cringing at that explanation.
“Call if anything happens, okay?” Johnny’s manager tells them.
“Yes, hyung,” Johnny promises.
“And you’re sure you don’t want to see a doctor?” Jaehyun’s manager asks.
“I just need some rest,” Jaehyun assures him.
Though the staff looks skeptical, they nod a reluctant approval and let Jaehyun and Johnny leave. Finally, Johnny puts an arm around Jaehyun’s shoulders and shepherds him into the building and to the elevator. The two remain quiet, staying close as the floor numbers tick up. It’s peaceful when they enter the dorms, with the other members usually retreating to their rooms by the time Johnny and Jaehyun get home from their evening recording. Jaehyun is thankful for that, especially right now, as he doesn’t think he has the fortitude to deal with Doyoung’s mothering or Taeyong’s concern if they were to see him like this.
“Come on,” Johnny whispers as he opens the door to their room and ushers Jaehyun inside.
As soon as he steps into the space he shares with Johnny, comfort falls around Jaehyun’s shoulders like a well-loved blanket. He beelines for his bed and faceplants onto it, breathing deeply.
“Tired?” Johnny asks with a laugh.
“Exhausted,” Jaehyun replies, the word mumbled as he speaks into the sheets. He turns his head and looks at Johnny, smiling. “I think I really do just need to get some sleep.”
“You take the shower first, then,” Johnny nods to the bathroom.
“Thanks, hyung,” Jaehyun says.
Part of him wishes that Johnny would join him. It will never happen, though. That’s part of the thoughts Jaehyun has to keep to himself. They may not be able to let the public know what they are, but the members have all spilled that secret. Johnny’s reveal was the least surprising, while Jaehyun received some shock from the other members when he disclosed to them.
“Of course you are,” Johnny had laughed and pinched Jaehyun’s cheek. “So cute.”
Jaehyun had blushed and pushed away his hand, even though he dangerously wanted Johnny. The daily medicine regimen was supposed to be enough to squash those desires as well to keep all of them in check, but it seemed Johnny was just special to Jaehyun.
Sitting up on the bed, Jaehyun pulls off his shirt and flings it haphazardly in the direction of their laundry hamper, barely managing to make it in. It’s not the first time either of them has stripped in front of the other like this, with no walls between them as they would get close to naked before disappearing into the bathroom to shower or underneath the sheets to sleep. Jaehyun’s skin chills under the artificial air of the AC blowing over his overheated body. He hops up from the bed and beelines for the bathroom, undoing the button of his pants as he goes.
“I’ll be quick,” Jaehyun says back to Johnny without looking at him. He thinks stealing a glance at the other man might be bad for his heart right now.
Once the door clicks shut behind him, Jaehyun sheds the rest of his clothes and stands there naked as he turns on the shower. He lets the water warm a bit, still relatively cool, before stepping into the spray. As soon as the stream hits his skin, Jaehyun sighs in relief. Maybe it’s a minor cold or something, playing with his body temperature, because the water seems to alleviate most of his discomfort immediately. Even though he just told Johnny that he’d be fast, Jaehyun fights the temptation to waste away an hour in here. After a few minutes spent luxuriating in the shower, Jaehyun sets through the motions to clean himself up.
When he drags a soapy hand down his chest, Jaehyun allows it to keep going a little further. He had been so preoccupied with his body temperature and feeling out of sorts that Jaehyun had no idea when he got hard. Another sigh of relief spills from Jaehyun’s lips when he wraps his fingers around himself. There’s one more nagging thought in the back of his head that he should be fast to let Johnny get in here soon, but all that succeeds in doing is putting the image in his head of Johnny in the shower with him.
“Fuck,” Jaehyun mutters quietly to himself.
There’s a pang of guilt over thinking about Johnny like this, but Jaehyun would be a liar to claim this is the first time he’s thought about Johnny to help him get off—not even the first time with Johnny just on the other side of the door. Maybe Jaehyun has a Johnny problem, but that’s not something he can really worry himself about right now—and preferably, he never will.
As Jaehyun strokes himself, he closes his eyes and imagines it’s Johnny’s broad hand instead of his own. He thinks about thick fingers and warm skin and how it would feel to have Johnny pressed up behind him, back-to-chest, as the taller man bends his head down to whisper into Jaehyun’s ear. Jaehyun wonders if Johnny would tell him that he’s good, that he’s pretty, and that Johnny wants him to come. Jaehyun wonders if Johnny is the type of partner who would mumble words of filth or adoration to him while they fuck—or maybe even both. Jaehyun would happily take anything that Johnny gives him.
Jaehyun’s hand speeds up, the endless fall of water helping his skin glide along with the precome dripping out of him. If he had more time, Jaehyun would venture to try to press a finger inside himself as well. For now, this is enough, fantasizing about Johnny in the shower with him and fucking him against the glass wall that’s currently fogged up. He comes with a whimper that sounds terribly like Johnny’s name and then watches the shower take away all the evidence of what he had just done.
When he steps out of the shower and dries off, Jaehyun feels a million times better than he did earlier. Maybe he’s just overworked and tired, which all managed to be healed by a good shower and orgasm. With a towel tied around his waist, Jaehyun picks up his dirty clothes and finally exits the bathroom.
Johnny is lying on his bed, phone above his head as he scrolls through whatever social media of choice he’s elected to waste time on for the evening.
“It’s all yours, hyung,” Jaehyun says.
“Thanks, Jaehyunnie,” Johnny replies and locks his phone, tossing it onto the bed. “Go to sleep, don’t wait up for me.”
“Okay,” Jaehyun nods. The two usually end up crawling into one another’s bed and watching something on a laptop until sleep claims them. He wishes they could do that tonight, too, but sleeping sooner rather than later is likely for the best.
Johnny disappears into the bathroom quickly after, and Jaehyun vaguely sees that his cheeks seem to be a little flushed. He doesn’t think much of it, assuming the other man is also tired. Jaehyun pulls on boxers and an oversized t-shirt after throwing his towel aside and climbs into bed. His skin still feels a little feverish, and his head isn’t completely unclouded yet. But the cool sheets also serve as a balm for his condition. It doesn’t take long for him to fall asleep.
— — —
When Jaehyun wakes up, it’s dark in the room. He blinks a few times, disoriented and confused about why he’s suddenly awake. Slowly, Jaehyun becomes aware of his own body—how his skin is overheated and sweaty again, how his clothes are sticking to him uncomfortably, how he’s hard, and, worst of all, how he doesn’t think that’s sweat he feels causing the back of his boxers to stick to his skin. Panic rises in his throat, resulting in a pathetic cry.
Johnny has always been a bit of a light sleeper, and that’s all it takes to wake him up.
“Jaehyun?” Johnny’s groggy voice, rough and deep, sounds from the other bed.
“Johnny hyung,” Jaehyun whines. He wants to cringe at the way his voice sounds, but Jaehyun can’t dwell on it long when his anxiety is confirmed with the feeling of becoming even wetter at his backside. “Johnny, help!”
In a flash, Johnny has turned on the small lamp and rushed over to Jaehyun’s side, taking a seat on the edge of the bed.
“What’s wrong—oh, fuck,” Johnny’s eyes widen as he looks down at Jaehyun. “Oh, Jaehyunnie.” His face softens considerably, even as there’s a hint of panic creasing his eyebrows. “Are you? Oh my god, I should go.”
“Don’t leave me,” Jaehyun whimpers, and he grabs Johnny’s wrist. Horrifyingly, both of them let out a slight whine at the contact.
“Fuck,” Johnny repeats. “I can’t. I have to tell—I need to get help. If you’re, you know, you’re, ah,” Johnny stumbles over his words.
“I can’t be,” Jaehyun gasps even as his body goes through all the telltale signs that he’s read about and been lectured on at length by his teachers, parents, and company health staff. “I can’t.”
“You are, Jaehyun,” Johnny replies quietly. “You’ve been taking your suppressants?”
“I have,” Jaehyun nods. He flips over onto his stomach and clutches a pillow he can bury his face in. “It’s so hot,” he complains and kicks the sheets off him.
“Oh,” Johnny gasps and falls off the bed. “Oh, I should go. Jaehyun, I really should go.”
“No.” Jaehyun whines, feeling as though the tears threatening the corners of his eyes will fall if he’s left here alone, if he’s left here without Johnny. “Please, I need you here.”
“Jaehyun…” Johnny says from the floor. “I shouldn’t be around you if you’re in heat. I can already feel it…I want…” Johnny’s eyes glaze over for a moment as he looks at Jaehyun spread out on the bed.
Jaehyun wonders if Johnny can see the wet stain on his boxers, which at first sounds like a terrible thing, but then it suddenly causes a needy burn through his body. Jaehyun wants Johnny to see it. Jaehyun wants Johnny to do something about it.
Johnny licks his lips. “I want you, but it can’t happen like this.”
Jaehyun’s body reacts to the admission before his brain processes the words spoken so faintly by Johnny.
Johnny wants him.
A tremor shivers down Jaehyun’s body, and desperation makes his clothes cling to his skin even more terribly. He’s on fire, from the tips of his fingers down to the soles of his feet, but even worse, those same flames threaten to burn him up from the inside.
“Johnny, please,” Jaehyun whines pitifully, and he hates it—hates how pathetic he sounds because just as Johnny said, he wants the other man but didn’t want it to be like this.
“Let me…let me go get someone,” Johnny offers gently.
One hand reaches out briefly, with just the tip of one finger swiping sweat-damp bangs off of Jaehyun’s forehead. It’s as though an entire subset of instincts has switched on, and Jaehyun suddenly grabs Johnny’s wrist to keep the hand there. Johnny’s eyes widen, but he guides his hand with the mobility Jaehyun still allows until it cups a soft, blushing cheek. Delicately, Johnny lets his thumb graze across the fevered skin that he’s yet to touch with the reverence he’s wanted to. But all Jaehyun can do is let out a loud sigh at the contact, just the barest bit satisfied by the touch.
“Does this help?” Johnny asks.
“A little,” Jaehyun replies. “It’s nice.”
Johnny exhales slowly and looks at the door while Jaehyun continues to enjoy the touch.
“Is there anything else that could help?” Johnny also asks.
Jaehyun hums for a moment, his mind pleasantly fuzzy as he clings to Johnny’s palm. “Well, ah,” Jaehyun starts, but then knows the tips of his ears start flaming red at what he doesn’t want to admit. “There’s something else.”
“What?”
Jaehyun reluctantly lets go of Johnny’s hand and falls back against the bed, staring up at the other man. When they returned to the dorms, one thing helped take some of the edge off.
“When we got back,” Jaehyun starts slowly. “When you let me shower first. I, ah, well, you know…in the shower.”
Johnny stares blankly at him for a moment before the realization of what Jaehyun admitted slowly dawns on him, his mouth falling open slightly.
“Oh, okay,” Johnny nods and looks away while his throat visibly bobs with a swallow. “Would that help again?”
“Maybe,” Jaehyun shrugs.
“Okay,” Johnny seems to have forgotten all other possible words to respond with. “Hold on.” He walks over to the pile of clothes he had worn today at the radio studio and pulls out the t-shirt he had on under his sweater. “Take this.”
Jaehyun frowns as he reaches out for the offered piece of clothing. His fingers curl around the fabric, digging into the soft but cold material. Johnny’s warmth is missing from it, but that doesn’t stop Jaehyun from embarrassingly bringing the shirt to his face and breathing it in. It happens before he can think, and there’s an immediate panic overtaking him as he tries to stumble his way through an apology.
“It’s okay,” Johnny puts a hand up to stop him, but there’s a flush on his cheeks as he tries to look somewhere over Jaehyun’s shoulder.
“I’m sorry,” Jaehyun says again anyway.
“Just, uh, I’ll…be here, if you need anything,” Johnny says.
“What?” Jaehyun remains confused.
“I’ll stay here while you’re in the bathroom, for, you know, privacy,” Johnny offers as though this is the most reasonable situation.
“Oh,” Jaehyun says softly, unable to even decide what he thought Johnny had meant by all this. “Okay.”
With veiled reluctance, Jaehyun takes the shirt with him into the bathroom, warring with the desire in him to drag Johnny into the small space with him. As he closes the door, Jaehyun steals a glimpse at Johnny, who has fallen back against his own bed and is staring at the ceiling. There’s a distinct tenting going on in his loose sleep pants, and Jaehyun stiffles a gasp as he slams the door shut and feels himself get wetter.
“Fuck,” he whispers to himself as he pulls off his clothes again and turns on the shower to a lukewarm setting. “Fuck this."
Jaehyun brings the used shirt up to his face once more and breathes in the scent that is so distinctly Johnny’s—something a little warm like a fire and well-worn leather jacket, a little spice that’s added to hot chocolate for a bit of bite, and then something gentle like an island flower surrounded by a sandy beach. It’s so good and has Jaehyun moaning, jaw dropping open in want.
Hastily, Jaehyun steps into the shower. He stands just in the right spot of the spray so that the water cascades down his back, alleviating some of the burn still radiating through his body, while he keeps Johnny’s shirt pressed against his nose. Taking loose hold of himself, Jaehyun starts stroking himself as his eyes drift closed. He doesn’t even try to deny himself thoughts of Johnny while he does this, freely painting a picture in his imagination of Johnny in the shower with him, telling him all sorts of things he wants to do to Jaehyun while fucking him.
But that’s also the issue. Whereas previously just getting himself off with his hand had served Jaehyun enough for a while, the quick strokes he gives himself now do little to help. It’s like pressing a tissue to a fresh, deep cut. It may help contain some of the bleeding, but soon that flimsy tissue will be soaked red, and something more dire, something sturdier, is needed to mend and heal the wound.
With reluctance, Jaehyun tosses Johnny’s shirt over the shower rail so it hangs beside him but remains out of the water. His free hand braces against the shower wall in front of him, and he bends over. Jaehyun trails his hand on his cock away, fingers skirting first down to briefly tug at his balls before moving back up and along his hip until they slip behind him. When Jaehyun presses a finger against himself, he’s damp from the shower but also dripping wet from his body’s own reaction. He shakes as a finger goes inside with no resistance, as though Jaehyun has been waiting to take it. One finger easily becomes two and then three, all while he angles his head to barely try to press it against the shirt still beside him.
For a few blissful minutes, Jaehyun believes this is it; this will help him calm down from whatever has set his body off into a cycle it had no business starting. He can almost settle for the dream of Johnny fucking him while Jaehyun tries to shove his face back into Johnny’s neck, licking and kissing the skin there as he takes deep breaths. Jaehyun rocks back, fucking himself on his own fingers while chanting Johnny’s name softly to himself as his eyes screw shut so hard he sees stars that look like stage lights illuminating Johnny’s face.
But it isn’t enough. Jaehyun remains just shy of even the edge. He whines a little pathetically and finds tears prickling at his lashes in frustration. He knows that this will all stop if he can come, if he can have someone inside him—someone who his body wants to yield to. The desire leaves Jaehyun frenzied. With an agitated groan, Jaehyun shuts off the water and stumbles out of the shower. He doesn’t bother with a towel and leaves the bathroom dripping wet in two ways.
“Did that help—ah,” Johnny asks, looking up from his phone. He’s lying on his bed, clearly trying to distract himself, but Jaehyun can also see that he’s still hard in his pants. “Jaehyun-ah?”
“Johnny hyung,” Jaehyun whines. “Hyungie.”
It’s all too easy for Jaehyun to make it over to Johnny’s bed and, with more grace than he expected, swing his leg over until he’s straddling the other’s lap.
“Oh,” Johnny says a little dumbly now that he has a lapful of Jaehyun, but more specifically, Jaehyun in heat, who wants nothing more than for the one person he has wanted for years now to help him through it. Johnny tosses his phone aside and seems to give in a little to his own desires as his free hands now drop to Jaehyun’s hips. On instinct, Jaehyun arches in the touch, pleased.
Hesitation remains at the tips of Johnny’s fingers; Jaehyun can sense the way they twitch and threaten to slide away against his skin. He’s so close to having what he wants, to having Johnny, so Jaehyun reaches out for the one bit of knowledge he has kept close to his chest, only dwelling on it when he feels particularly plagued with a melancholy in his bones that couldn’t quite be quelled. It was a thought for the days when Jaehyun found something in his core aching to be wanted, to be needed, and maybe even to be claimed.
Licking his lips, Jaehyun leans forward and dips his head next to Johnny’s so he can speak into the other man’s ear.
“Doyoung hyung told me, you know,” Jaehyun says quietly, barely audible over the rough sounds of Johnny’s breathing. “That one time when the two of you went out drinking, you said you liked me, hyung. You said you’d want someone like me. You want me.”
As far as Jaehyun knows, it’s the truth. Jaehyun had been teasing Doyoung about his crush on Taeyong, absolutely delighting with how Doyoung got worked up and flustered in a way he rarely did. He had been ready with another question about Doyoung kissing Taeyong when his hyung had flung the sentence so easily at him as though it was a bird spiriting through the air.
“Johnny hyung likes you too, you know.”
“I don’t—” Jaehyun tried to argue, but Doyoung waved him away the same way he swatted aside a gnat.
“You’re not exactly subtle, Jaehyunnie,” Doyoung said. “The way you look at him in some of those Ennana photos, everyone knows. Well, I don’t think Johnny hyung does. He’s kinda oblivious.”
“How do you know?” Jaehyun had asked cautiously.
Doyoung shrugged. “We went out drinking, started talking about relationships, and he said he liked you. But then he tried to say that he meant that he would want to be with someone like you.” Doyoung giggled a little at that. “I think you two would be adorable together.”
“We can’t…” Jaehyun trailed off. He had left the living room shortly after that, hiding in his shared room with Johnny until he had also come home from the gym. Jaehyun pretended to be too tired for a movie that night.
But the way Johnny suddenly stops trembling, and his breath ends in a gasp now as Jaehyun sits naked on his lap, it’s all the confirmation he needs that Doyoung wasn’t full of shit.
“You’re killing me,” Johnny says softly, almost a sigh.
With that, Johnny firmly grasps Jaehyun’s hips and flips them so he’s pressing Jaehyun against the bed and hovering over him. His eyes shine with withheld intent as he travels his gaze down Jaehyun’s body, biting his lip in consideration. Feeling the other’s focus narrowed in on him, Jaehyun slowly spreads his legs, allowing for more space for Johnny’s larger body to settle. Johnny inhales sharply but makes himself home between Jaehyun’s thighs.
Jaehyun parts his lips, trying to drink in the scent that surrounds him of warm spices and a fresh cup of espresso, which reminds him of sitting across from Johnny at a corner table in a coffee shop. But this is so much better than being pressed close at a small table, with their knees knocking together and apologetic smiles for the lack of personal space. Jaehyun was never apologetic; he wanted Johnny in his space.
“This is a bad idea,” Johnny whispers softly, but before Jaehyun can argue or pout in disappointment, there are lips against his.
Jaehyun’s hands move of their own accord, immediately burying themselves in Johnny’s thick hair as he moans. At the same time, Jaehyun’s legs lock around Johnny’s waist and hold tight. A groan rumbles out of Johnny as he licks into Jaehyun’s mouth with a dizzying fervour. When Jaehyun arches up, his bare, dripping cock grinds against the soft material of Johnny’s sweats. Even just that bit of friction offers a tiny amount of relief to the fire still crackling across Jaehyun’s skin.
One of Johnny’s hands settles on Jaehyun’s waist, right at his hip, where the thumb can graze gently at the jut of hipbones. Jaehyun squirms in the hold, thoughts going pleasantly fuzzy in a way where all he can think about is Johnny on top of him. As they continue to kiss, Johnny allows his hand to slide around the back of Jaehyun’s thigh, squeezing his ass before resting on the warm, slick skin of his inner thigh. A gasp bursts from Jaehyun’s mouth, causing his lips to fall away from Johnny’s.
“You’re so…” Johnny’s voice trembles, as though he’s struggling to find the words.
“Hyung,” Jaehyun whines.
Johnny’s lips are parted, panting, as he keeps his gaze focused on Jaehyun’s face while the hand on his thigh travels up and up until fingers curiously follow a path.
“Johnny hyung,” Jaehyun pleads with just the other’s name.
“Jaehyunnie,” Johnny responds. “Let me know if you don’t like it.”
Jaehyun nods in reply to give permission for those long fingers he’s watched play the piano and grip around the stem of a wine glass to now slowly press inside him. It’s not a new sensation since Jaehyun’s done it to himself enough times, but somehow the first slide overwhelms every other feeling currently shaking his nerves. With how wet Jaehyun is, the first finger goes in so easily. It makes Jaehyun dizzy, dropping his legs from where they’d been clamped around Johnny so he can spread them wider, offer more of himself up. He whispers Johnny’s name as the finger starts to slowly thrust in and out.
“Fuck, Jaehyun…” Johnny’s words continue to trail off in wonder.
“Add another,” Jaehyun encourages him.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
The second finger slides in easily, and the slight extra stretch has Jaehyun moaning.
“I think about you,” Jaehyun whispers.
“What?” Johnny asks, dazed. His pupils are blown wide as he continues to trace every line of Jaehyun’s body with his eyes.
“When I do this to myself,” Jaehyun explains. “I always think about you.”
There’s a spike in the warm scent around him, and it makes Jaehyun shiver appreciatively. Jaehyun places one hand on the back of Johnny’s neck, scratching at the skin and skimming his fingertips through the hair at Johnny’s nape.
“Me, too,” Johnny admits.
Jaehyun can’t help but laugh a little, still incredulous to find himself in this situation and to know that Johnny has been craving him in all the same ways. The two fingers inside Jaehyun are joined by a third, with the slow thrusting speeding up and experimentally spreading them a little on each press in. Jaehyun’s back arches at the pleasure. He knows there’s just a little more that he needs.
“Johnny hyung,” Jaehyun moans. “Harder, get deeper.”
“Okay,” Johnny nods as he answers.
Dipping his head down, Johnny goes to place a kiss on the corner of Jaehyun’s mouth, but Jaehyun is quick to turn his head at the right time to snare Johnny into a proper kiss. They both make satisfied, pleased noises at the contact. Johnny’s tongue slips into Jaehyun’s mouth as his three fingers thrust in. Jaehyun moans helplessly and keeps arching up, trying to also press back onto Johnny’s fingers. It takes a few attempts, but then Johnny hits just deep enough. The pads of his fingers slide over where Jaehyun has needed him, and it shoots a world-rocking pleasure through his body. Jaehyun nearly screams if it weren’t for Johnny kissing him harder.
After that, Johnny is quick to maintain that pace and depth, fucking Jaehyun with his fingers while all Jaehyun can do is moan and grip onto Johnny’s shirt and bare arms while trying to grind against one of Johnny’s thighs.
Fire still licks at Jaehyun’s skin, that heat never dissipating even as the base need in Jaehyun gets met. But Jaehyun knows he’s going to need more; he’s going to need Johnny inside him, fucking him properly. The thought thrills and terrifies Jaehyun just a little as he twists against the sheets, chasing the pleasure.
Johnny shifts to firmly keep one leg pressed against Jaehyun's cock so he can rut against it. Even that gesture has Jaehyun falling apart a little more, having Johnny take care of him so wholly just to make sure he feels good. He can still see the outline of Johnny’s own hardness through the sweats that are slowly sliding lower on his hips. Too many clothes are still on him, and Jaehyun tries to tear the shirt off Johnny uselessly since all his fingers do is slip and lose grip as he can’t concentrate.
Nevertheless, Johnny understands Jaehyun’s frustration and pulls back just enough to yank his shirt off and throw it aside. Jaehyun can’t even complain about the fingers slipping out of him once he has shirtless Johnny in front of him. It’s not a new sight, but in this context, the experience takes Jaehyun’s breath away. When Johnny settles back down over Jaehyun, the bare contact cools Jaehyun’s fevered skin in a way that makes him moan and claw at Johnny’s arms. A kiss drops at Jaehyun’s jaw, and then another and another until Johnny forges a trail to Jaehyun’s ear.
“You smell good,” Johnny mumbles shyly. “You always do, but right now…wow.”
“You, too,” Jaehyun replies and tries to tug Johnny back into a kiss.
“Like something fresh and clean and sweet,” Johnny says with a sigh. “It’s nice.”
Jaehyun would tell Johnny about how everything Jaehyun finds comfort in the well is encapsulated in Johnny’s scent, but he’s getting consumed by the reverent hands caressing his body. Johnny never stops, always touching and exploring and seeing how Jaehyun reacts to everything until his fingers slip back inside Jaehyun, three this time as they thrust steadily.
“It’s good,” Jaehyun whimpers.
“Yeah?” Johnny perks a little. “Can you…Can you come like this?”
“If you keep going,” Jaehyun gasps and shakes.
“I won’t stop,” Johnny says, and Jaehyun knows it’s a promise. “Wanna watch you.” There’s a slight looseness to Johnny’s words now, too, with all of them flowing into each other.
Jaehyun lets his eyes close, taking in the sight of Johnny’s flushed chest and the light sheen of sweat on his forehead before he does. Like this, all of Jaehyun’s focus centers on the way Johnny’s fingers move inside them, how they thrust in and out and slide just right to get Jaehyun moaning. It’s almost like Johnny’s instincts led him to just the right touches to drive Jaehyun wild—as if Johnny was always meant to take care of Jaehyun like this. Jaehyun might be able to come at just that thought, that Johnny’s always been meant to be his.
After a particularly hard thrust into Jaehyun that leaves him choking on air, Johnny shifts down Jaehyun’s body until his lips hover over Jaehyun’s cock. He licks at it a few times, thoughtfully, which only makes Jaehyun cry out, not even remotely thinking about the other members in the dorm. As soon as Johnny’s hot mouth slides over Jaehyun’s cock, his world shutters and explodes. Jaehyun comes, a surprise to him as much as it is to Johnny. Jaehyun doesn’t feel as though he’s himself as he does, but rather that he’s drifting somewhere beyond. His back arches as his fingers twitch, his vision whiting out as he gasps. All through the orgasm, Johnny’s fingers fuck him hard, making him twist in the sheets and cry out. Jaehyun didn’t know that coming could feel this fucking good, a million times better than when he’s by himself and relying on nothing but his hands.
When Jaehyun’s brain unfogs, it’s the first time in hours that he doesn’t feel overheated and needy in a way that consumes him. There’s still a prickling under his skin, but it’s more of a dull buzz now that he can try and ignore it.
“Fuck,” Johnny whispers. “Jaehyunnie.”
Jaehyun blinks his eyes open slowly and stares up at Johnny. The other man’s eyes are wide, pupils even more blown and a little wild. When he catches Jaehyun’s eyes, Johnny smiles widely, bordering on feral with the way his sweat-matted hair sticks to his forehead and a single drop slides down his neck.
“You okay?”
“I’m great,” Jaehyun replies sincerely. “I feel better. Thank you.”
Johnny hums. “You came so much, baby.”
“Stop,” Jaehyun whines and tries to swat Johnny away, but Johnny catches his wrist and drops a kiss to his knuckles. It’s such a contrast to everything that just happened.
“I don’t think I can now,” Johnny replies. His throat bobs with a swallow, and he ruts against one of Jaehyun’s thighs, his still hard cock rubbing through fabric to meet Jaehyun’s warm skin.
“Should I?” Jaehyun asks vaguely as he reaches out to place a hand on Johnny’s thigh.
“I think…” Johnny stops to swallow again. “I think we should wait, just in case you need…more…”
The simple insinuation that Jaehyun’s heat will crash over him again and have him desperate in a way that will require more from Johnny makes him shiver a little, but he nods in acceptance. Jaehyun places his hands on Johnny’s waist and tugs him down, coaxing him to lie down on the bed so the two may face each other. Johnny exudes warmth from his sweat-damp skin and the continued scent of comforting spices and coffee, so Jaehyun cannot help but press in close until Johnny locks his arms around Jaehyun’s waist and tucks Jaehyun’s head under his chin. A sigh of satisfaction flutters from Jaehyun’s lips as his eyes slip shut.
“Should we talk about this?” Johnny asks. “We should talk about this,” he corrects.
“Probably,” Jaehyun whispers. “But I do want this. I want you.”
“I know,” Johnny says with a kiss to Jaehyun’s head. “But I really, really want to make sure…and it’s not.”
“Hyung,” Jaehyun huffs, “I already told you that I want you, I have wanted you. What else do you need?”
“I’m just—I don’t know, concerned.”
“Well, don’t be.”
Jaehyun frowns to himself, skin prickling as the tendrils of icy rejection curl into his chest. Sometimes his hyungs still can’t shake the memory of their little Jaehyunnie, for a time, a maknae they shielded from worries. Johnny, possibly still viewing him in that lens, constricts his throat, and Jaehyun tries to pull away, suddenly ill with the thought that Johnny may not want any of this.
“Jaehyun, no,” Johnny strengthens his hold around Jaehyun, not allowing him to leave. The power in those arms has Jaehyun whining a little, but Johnny misinterprets it as distress. “Baby, I’m sorry. I want you, I just don’t want your heat to make you think anything else.”
“I’m fine right now,” Jaehyun replies. “I can think, and I think that this is perfect.”
He feels the smile that spreads across Johnny’s lips against his hair, and there’s a rumble in Johnny’s chest that preludes the laugh that tumbles out of his mouth. Johnny says something above him, but Jaehyun’s eyes snap open and eye the expanse of skin in front of him that he barely had time to appreciate. Tentatively, Jaehyun kisses Johnny’s collarbone, following it with a lick. Above him, Johnny stops talking and gasps.
“Johnny hyung,” Jaehyun whispers. “You taste good, too.”
“Fuck,” Johnny groans, and his hold on Jaehyun loosens to allow him easier access.
A new clawing need takes root in Jaehyun’s core, one that focuses all its attention on Johnny. There’s a hook in his gut that won’t dislodge until Jaehyun satisfies Johnny—satisfies his alpha because there’s no doubt in Jaehyun’s mind that that’s what Johnny will be after this. With a gentle push, Jaehyun presses Johnny against the mess of sheets on the bed and climbs on top of him.
As a first matter of business, Jaehyun kisses Johnny, deep and slow, trying to avoid the frenzy that they both allowed to take over earlier. Even just from this, Jaehyun pathetically feels himself drip, the skin between his thighs still slick and messy. Once he’s had his fill of Johnny’s mouth for now and the plush lips pressing against his, he creeps his kisses away, dotting them across Johnny’s jaw and neck. When he arrives at Johnny’s chest, Jaehyun pushes up to keep moving down and down, licking, kissing, and biting at any and every bit of Johnny. When he runs a tongue around one of Johnny’s nipples, Johnny’s deep groan causes Jaehyun to tremble in need. One of Johnny’s large hands settles in Jaehyun’s hair, petting and pulling in equal parts as Jaehyun continues to traverse his body with his lips and tongue.
When Jaehyun gets to the low-sitting waistband of Johnny’s sweats, the achingly obvious tent of Johnny’s cock draws him in further. Without a thought, Jaehyun mouths at it over the cloth, getting the fabric wet. He wants it so bad.
“Jaehyun-ah,” Johnny moans, tugging Jaehyun’s head away. “Let me…”
It takes self-restraint that leaves Jaehyun trembling to pull back just enough, allowing Johnny the space to pull off and toss aside his sweat pants and underwear, but the promise of seeing Johnny’s cock gives him patience. Except when it’s finally in front of him, Jaehyun’s need to have it inside increases tenfold and has him whining in desperation, falling onto it with his mouth and licking.
“Oh, fuck!” Johnny cries out as Jaehyun barely waits to put it in his mouth, and for what doesn’t fit, his hand wraps around it.
He’s never done this before, only watched a few videos secretly on his phone while Johnny wasn’t in the room for an evening spent with family. At first, he’s a little overzealous, gagging immediately, but then he slows down, filled with the desire to also make this good for Johnny. He wants to be so fucking good for Johnny.
That cloud of need rolls into Jaehyun’s head slowly, and he finds it increasingly difficult to concentrate on Johnny as the fever in his body starts to take hold again. But Jaehyun wants to suck Johnny’s dick and wants to feel him come down his throat. He struggles to keep bobbing his head up and down, keep dragging moans out of Johnny, but his jaw keeps going slack as the desire to be fucked takes over.
And Johnny senses the change immediately as he whispers Jaehyun’s name with concern, gently pulling him away from his cock and taking him into his arms. Jaehyun ruts and rubs against Johnny’s bare skin, his cock leaking across Johnny’s thighs as the wetness at his back also starts to slip between his thighs again.
“You’re so pretty like this,” Johnny says as he lays Jaehyun across the bed.
Jaehyun preens at the words, basking in the praise over his appearance. On any day, Jaehyun knows he looks good, but to hear Johnny say it at a time like this, when he feels nothing more than a mess, cuts into his chest with confidence.
“Hyungie,” Jaehyun whines, “I need more now.”
Johnny nods. “I can do that,” he says with a shaking breath. “Let me…let me get…” he trails off and turns away from Jaehyun, who whines even louder at losing the alpha’s attention and paws at his hands. “Don’t worry,” Johnny says with a small smile. “I just need to get something.”
Watching intently, Jaehyun bites his lip as Johnny opens a drawer in his bedside table and pulls out the box that the company gave to them for emergency purposes only. While they were strictly forbidden from ever acting on their secondary types, the company knew there were cases where suppressants failed to do their job. Johnny rustles through the box and pulls out the supplied box of condoms. Jaehyun lets out a disappointed noise, which makes Johnny laugh.
“I know,” Johnny smirks at him. “But I think we’re being risky enough right now. Plus, we have a comeback soon.”
Jaehyun has just enough of his mind not laden with lust to roll his eyes at the comment. Impatiently, he hooks one leg around Johnny as the other man double-checks the instructions on the back of the box and tears one off the strip to open it. Both their breaths seem halted as Johnny rolls the condom onto his cock. A disappointed pang still rings through Jaehyun, but he knows they have to do this to avoid anything unplanned as an omega. But one day, he hopes, they won’t have to.
The two take a few moments to rearrange themselves on the bed, finding what will be most comfortable.
“We’ll be, ah, joined, you know, for a while,” Johnny stumbles through the words.
“When you knot me,” Jaehyun says bluntly.
It’s Johnny’s turn to roll his eyes. “Yes, Jaehyunnie.”
Once Jaehyun lies comfortably against the pillows from both their beds and has one of Johnny’s discarded shirts near him to the side, he nods up at Johnny, who is quick to draw him into a deep kiss.
“I hope you know how much I want you,” Johnny says in the small space between their lips, where their breaths mix, “that I want to take care of you.”
“I know,” Jaehyun replies quietly and swallows.
He had always dreamt of grand romance, had hoped fleetingly that maybe it could be with one of the people, perhaps the person, honestly, that he knows and cares for most in the world. The fact that he’s on the precipice of that right now has Jaehyun fighting back tears that are otherwise also blocked by the arousal shooting through his veins, making him arch his back and moan with need.
“Ready?” Johnny asks.
Jaehyun nods and follows it with a whispered yes.
With legs spread wide and one of Johnny’s broad palms on a thigh to hold him open, Jaehyun holds his breath as Johnny’s other hand guides his cock to Jaehyun. Johnny murmurs at him to breathe, which makes Jaehyun let out a long exhale as the tip presses against him. There’s little resistance as Johnny pushes into Jaehyun, as though Jaehyun’s body was only made to welcome him inside. With how wet Jaehyun is, the slide goes easily and makes a noise that could make his ears burn red, but it’s also a sign for our desperate for Johnny that Jaehyun has been this whole time. Both of them let out startled moans, nowhere near prepared for the overwhelming sensation of being connected for the first time like this. Jaehyun’s eyes close as he throws his head back and gasps, and both his hands fly to Johnny’s shoulders to hold on for dear life. Once Johnny fully thrusts into Jaehyun, they are able to breathe.
“Fuck,” Johnny mutters, “fuck, fuck.”
“Yeah,” Jaehyun gasps, uselessly.
“Are you okay?”
Jaehyun catalogs his body. Every muscle and nerve is tense with anticipation, but there’s a crackling over pleasure just barely skirting over the surface to dull the exertion already coursing through him. The stretch of his leg muscles gives a satisfying ache, as though he’s stretching after a particularly good workout. But it’s the space between his legs where Johnny is inside him that has Jaehyun’s body reeling and calling out for more. He wants more.
“I’m good,” Jaehyun nods. “I’ll be better if you move.”
Johnny chuckles at that. “Of course, Jaehyunnie. Whatever you want.”
With that, Johnny slowly slides out of Jaehyun until the tip is left inside, and then thrusts back with the haste of trickling honey. Jaehyun’s eyes flutter open as he moans, so he may look up at Johnny. Beads of sweat already continue dotting Johnny’s forehead where his own hands have nervously pushed his bangs back several times, and there’s a flush coating his cheekbones. It’s different from the way Johnny looks after practice or when they’re coming off stage, but there’s still a faint familiarity underneath that makes Jaehyun’s heart clutch. This is still the Johnny who has been at his side for years, and now, they are able to finally cross the line into what they’d been circling around and avoiding.
“Keep going,” Jaehyun urges.
Johnny listens, thrusting in and out of Jaehyun at an even pace that keeps both of them feeling a buzz of pleasure down their spines. Jaehyun assumed his first time, especially if it was with Johnny, would be messy and fast, but it seems that Johnny has other ideas. He keeps steady, building up their arousal as they kiss and moan into each other’s mouths. Johnny dips his head to lick and get his lips on any skin that he can reach, which makes Jaehyun moan over the fact that he can’t reciprocate while he lies there and takes what Johnny gives him.
When Jaehyun tries to tighten up around Johnny, it makes the other man moan too loudly and thrust in quickly, frenzied. Any triumph over causing Johnny to lose his composure is short-lived when the thrust hits just right inside Jaehyun and has him crying out. It’s a raw, ragged sound that has Johnny falling over Jaehyun and shifting one leg over his shoulder so he can keep that angle and fuck Jaehyun deeper, faster.
This time, when Jaehyun comes, it takes them it’s a cresting crescendo. Johnny stumbles into a steady rhythm, angled to keep Jaehyun crying out until he buries his face in Johnny’s neck to try and stifle the noise. They’re being loud, but neither of them has the mental capacity to even offer a momentary thought to what the rest of the dorm must hear right now, let alone any other sensory indicators of what’s going on behind their closed door. Everything builds and churns in Jaehyun gradually, as though each time Johnny fucks into him, a little bit of Jaehyun’s heat gets turned down. Jaehyun wants to whine, and cry, and ask for more, but Johnny give and gives without Jaehyun needing to utter a single demand—he takes care of Jaehyun so completely.
A sharp thrust makes Jaehyun’s back arch and mouth drop open in a silent scream that would have sounded like Johnny’s name if he could formulate a word. Untouched, he comes messily between their bodies, shaking under Johnny, who doesn’t relent.
Jaehyun goes boneless against the sheets, but one hand keeps a firm grip on Johnny’s bicep as he whispers for the other man to keep going, to not stop. The two surge into a frenzied kiss, rough with biting, followed by Johnny’s tongue licking into Jaehyun’s mouth, sliding inside in a way that would make Jaehyun want to give everything to Johnny if he wasn’t doing so already. When they break apart, Johnny’s thrusts slow into a lazy roll.
“Are you okay?” Johnny asks.
Jaehyun hums and nods. “I feel good. I feel better.”
“Do you want to take a break?” Johnny asks with a kiss to the corner of Jaehyun’s mouth, and then another on the point of his cheek where the dimple pops out.
“Can we move?” Jaehyun asks. “Can we both lie down? It’ll be better.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Johnny nods a little dumbly, immediately getting into motion to do as Jaehyun asks.
When Jaehyun whines at the loss of Johnny’s cock inside him, Johnny whispers soothing words into his ear while resituating their bodies. He gets Jaehyun laid out on his side in front of him and hooks an arm under Jaehyun’s leg, pulling it up to better spread him open.
“Hold on for just a second, baby,” Johnny says, and this time it’s Jaehyun’s turn to comply.
Carefully, Johnny takes hold of himself and slides back inside Jaehyun. They’ve only been apart for a few minutes, yet the single slow, long thrust feels like coming home to a place he’s yearned for his whole life. Jaehyun thinks he could spend his whole life like this, with Johnny.
“Thank you,” Johnny says softly and kisses the back of Jaehyun’s neck, and he takes over holding Jaehyun’s leg again.
Like this, the thrusts are slow, but Jaehyun feels every bit of Johnny’s cock as he pushes in and out. He’s still dripping so much and so slick that the languid pace has an obscene sound accompanying him, which borders on embarrassing for Jaehyun. It’s as though he can hear his own body’s desperation to be filled. His head turns into the pillow as he moans. A tightness strains through Jaehyun’s body, like a coil pulled tight despite how sated he felt following his second orgasm. He might have come twice, and once on Johnny’s cock, but he needs more. His heat needs more.
Jaehyun finds Johnny’s hand on his leg and spreads his fingers over it. Johnny manages to barely lift his pinky so it can rest over Jaehyun’s. Under Johnny’s touch, Jaehyun grows restless as his heat bubbles into another piercing need to be connected to Johnny even more. He starts to roll his hips to thrust back and thrashes his head back to entice Johnny into a kiss. Desperation crawls along his skin, not as clawing as it was earlier in the evening, but still needy and unbearable in a way that Jaehyun doesn’t think he can stand for much longer.
“Come on,” Jaehyun moans. “Johnny, do it. John, please.”
There’s a sharp intake of breath behind him. Eyes fluttering, Jaehyun looks back at Johnny and the way his nostrils flare, and his eyes darken. Jaehyun whines in response, turned on by how Johnny’s fucking him and the shadow of desire that falls over Johnny’s face.
“You want it?”
“Yeah.”
They’re both breathless.
Johnny takes the arm under Jaehyun’s head and curls it back, his bicep against Jaehyun’s forehead, pulling him back. Like this, Jaehyun’s body arches a little more, naturally driven to the position by the angle of his neck. It keeps the two of them pressed close. After a few more thrusts, Jaehyun gasps at how the base of Johnny’s cock starts to catch at his rim when he pulls out, and then each thrust manages to stretch him just a little wider. Jaehyun moans and buries his face into the crook of Johnny’s elbow, his body involuntarily rolling over a little as Johnny thrusts harder.
There’s a deep moan of Jaehyun’s name, and then Johnny isn’t pulling out again, the arm on Jaehyun’s head falling away to lay across the pillow. When Johnny comes, Jaehyun still moans at the warmth filling him despite the condom. He tries to thrust back, wanting more, but he finds that he can’t move. A knot rests firmly around the base of Johnny’s cock, keeping him in place deep inside Jaehyun, as though it’s where he belongs and there’s nowhere else for him to go. In a way, that feels true now. It’s the knowledge that they’re connected so deeply that makes Jaehyun shake again. He doesn’t even know when he got hard again, but he comes across the sheets. It’s barely anything, but it has Jaehyun panting in satisfaction.
“You came again?” Johnny asks, a little awed even while his voice is tight in sensitivity.
“Yeah,” Jaehyun sighs. “I did…the knot…”
“You’re doing so well,” Johnny assures quickly.
Jaehyun preens at the compliment as though he hasn’t basked after Johnny told him he did a good job after a performance or that he looked pretty while they sat side by side in makeup chairs. This is different, but no better than any other time that Johnny doles out his adoration to Jaehyun.
Carefully, Johnny resituates them from the way he was almost on top, fucking Jaehyun into the mattress. He gets them both returned to their sides, where they remain joined. Johnny trails kisses up and down Jaehyun’s neck and spine until Jaehyun twists to capture Johnny’s mouth in a languid kiss.
“How long will this be?” Jaehyun asks in the space between their lips.
“About 20 minutes, but the first time can be longer,” Johnny answers.
“Kiss me,” Jaehyun says in response, and Johnny doesn’t hesitate.
It’s slow, like they have all the time in the world to drift down this river together as their lips press and pull, bite and suck, until Jaehyun gasps breathless with it. The aroma of warm spices and espresso swirls around him, settling into him and making Jaehyun content in a way that seems maybe he’s been waiting his whole life for. He didn’t know his body could go this boneless and pliant, and that it’s all for Johnny.
They split apart, and Jaehyun turns his head back around to press his face against the cool pillow under him. The clawing heat in his veins simmers down to something more tolerable, like when he’s exerted by the end of a day in the practice room. Johnny pushes his face into the back of Jaehyun’s neck and breathes in deeply, taking in his scent.
“Sweet,” Johnny says softly. “So sweet for me.”
Jaehyun smiles and closes his eyes. Johnny just barely needs to move his mouth to be at the juncture of Jaehyun’s neck that’s smooth skin, waiting to be claimed. A tremor passes through his body at the notion of receiving the public mark, but that’s something that will have to remain a dream for now. As though sensing his thoughts, Johnny shifts so he can place a kiss on the skin right at the border of where his bite may one day go. Jaehyun whines, wishing it could be more.
“I know,” Johnny sighs out.
Johnny slides his arms around Jaehyun’s body and pulls him closer, ridding them of any fine millimeters of space where their skin may not press together already. Jaehyun cannot imagine the arm trapped between him and the bed must be comfortable, but Johnny bears it nonetheless.
There’s a creeping, nagging part of his brain that knows they should talk about this, about what they’re going to do, not even when Jaehyun’s heat passes, but when they’re able to pull apart and eventually need to leave the room. What are they going to do when a manager inevitably comes irritably knocking at the door?
“Do you think this has ever happened before?” Jaehyun asks.
“Which part?” Johnny asks wryly, and Jaehyun doesn’t need to see him to know there’s a smirk on his face.
“Suppressants not working,” Jaehyun replies. He tries to kick back at Johnny for his cheekiness, but it ends up shifting his cock inside Jaehyun, making them both hiss as the knot still tugs them close.
“Probably,” Johnny says. “I just can’t imagine this is the first time.”
“Why do you think it happened?”
Johnny hums contemplatively. “Maybe we’re too compatible?”
“Sure,” Jaehyun snorts, even as he ticks off all the ways the two do fit well together.
“You don’t think so?”
“I do,” Jaehyun replies softly.
“It’s something the staff and doctors will have to deal with later, I guess,” Johnny says.
“Do you think they’ll make us switch rooms?” Jaehyun asks.
“Maybe,” Johnny answers. “But now that you’ve had a heat, and we, well, because we spent it together, you might not be able to be apart from me.”
“I haven’t spent the whole heat with you,” Jaehyun points out, not acknowledging the fact that his body already always automatically turned to Johnny like a sunflower, wanting to bask in his light.
“Yet,” Johnny adds. “You haven’t spent the whole heat with me yet, but you will. We’ll be here as long as it takes for you not to look like you’re going to collapse if you don’t get fucked.”
“Stop,” Jaehyun whines.
“Is that not what happened?” Johnny asks. The knot has started to go down, and he gives a little thrust with the small space they have to move.
“Yes,” Jaehyun gasps out.
“Yes, what?” Johnny pushes, giving another small experimental thrust.
“Yes, Johnny,” Jaehyun doesn’t remember what he’s saying as the slow blanket of need starts to envelop him again. “Fuck.”
Johnny wraps a hand around Jaehyun’s dick, stroking unhurriedly as he continues the shallow thrusts, barely fucking into Jaehyun, grinding needily. Time stretches again as Jaehyun gives into the pleasure and can only focus on everything Johnny that surrounds him until that clench in his core starts to gently unfurl, taking its time to allow itself to bloom. Jaehyun’s mouth drops open, silent, as he borders on overstimulation but still so needy for it.
“I can’t,” Jaehyun gasps out, but it’s a lie. He can, and he will.
The knot is basically all the way down now, and Johnny can fuck into Jaehyun earnestly now, but it’s a dangerous game with Johnny still hard and the condom already used. There are fingers pinching at his nipples and nails scraping across his abs, driving him a little mad with need. But Jaehyun can’t think, can’t focus on anything other than the way Johnny is seemingly surrounding him and taking over every single one of Jaehyun’s senses.
It all happens at once. Johnny manages to finally pull completely out of Jaehyun, a hiss escaping between his clenched teeth, and then he tightens his fist just enough to have Jaehyun crying out and coming again, this time making a mess of Johnny’s palm and the sheets in front of him.
Jaehyun doesn’t think he’s ever been this worn thin before, even after all the times, as a trainee, he was driven to the brink. But there’s still a contentedness blanketing him, keeping him held together and sane when he thinks he could just shake apart if he so much as tries to lift a finger. There’s a brief loss of warmth at his back, and Jaehyun moans pitifully. But then Johnny is there, rolling Jaehyun over onto his back while hovering over him. Deep brown eyes watch Jaehyun with concern as hands glide over his skin, a thumb gliding and pressing against a wrist, to make sure that he’s okay.
“Stay,” Jaehyun whispers.
“I’m not going anywhere,” Johnny assures him.
Outside the door of their dorm room, there’s a hurricane waiting for them. They’re going to be questioned, picked, and prodded at. Their members will swarm around them, creating their own line of defense, which Jaehyun doesn’t doubt. But for now, the two of them have this moment, this imperfect but precious moment of finally being together, even if it’s been a mess. All that matters to Jaehyun is that he knows who his alpha is now, and it’s the one person he had ached for it to be for so, so long. His heat will inevitably spike again, and Johnny will be there, through this and every time after. So, instead of allowing himself to lose this moment to the anxiety outside, Jaehyun allows himself to be pulled into Johnny’s embrace of warm skin, tucking into the place where he belongs.