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Growing up in Hanamura had many perks, especially as a son of the Shimadas. There were throngs of influential people waiting to shake his hand, money as no object, he was able to devour indescribably delicious meals and women alike. The night life twinkling, full of flickering business signs, the sounds of the city filled to the brim with buzzing lights and laughter. Genji did not know what it was like to go without. He’d be even less inclined to believe any person who told him that there was definitely something missing from the life he led in Hanamura.
His back planted against the ramshackle roof of his space at the monastery, Genji reflected on how silly he was to not notice what his life lacked those years ago in Hanamura. He didn’t know true friendship, the amicable bond he shared with so many people in Overwatch and with the Shambali were leagues beyond anything he’d known among nobles simply trying to gain his favor. He’d not known the liberation of being free from the Shimada clan and it’s dark duties. Of course he’d had his fair share of dubious missions with Blackwatch, but the organization had a well-intentioned goal, the Shimada clan was a power-hungry group that killed for personal gain, to have others live in fear while they basked.
He gave up much to leave that life behind, including his corporeal flesh in favor for steel and carbon fiber. His departure from the clan was tumultuous, but ultimately one of the best things that could have happened to him. It took time, but his new form was just that, a new vessel for his very human spirit. He may not exhibit all the physical traits of man, but he felt them, and he knew deep down it was mostly thanks to the slow-going training from his Master Zenyatta, and the ever-encouraging words and actions of Dr. Ziegler.
It took him so long to admit he was not just a man reborn machine, and he never got the chance to thank her for everything she had done for him. How much it all really meant, while he continued to brood and aloofly float around the compound.
Genji gazed upon the stars, his visor held in his left hand beside him, and his right hand clutched over his heart that thrummed like a march. He watched the sky sparkle and laugh, his sepia eyes crinkling as he let fond memories wash over his being. It had been too long for him to allow himself to feel happiness, to allow himself to feel anything other than self-pity and anger.
Above all he felt grateful, and slightly annoyed at himself, that he had mistreated the members of Overwatch during his time before it’s disbandment. That he had been so distant, and at times flat out rude when people tried so hard to bring him comfort in the form of friendship. He could admit now that he saw them as friends, but perhaps that window has closed.
His eyes wandered along the stars, tracing the few constellations he knew. He needed more than anything to tell Dr. Zielger how much all she did mattered to him. How much she helped him to sleep at night when at times he felt all he could do was stare at the ceiling and think of all his shortcomings. He needed to tell her that the tea and meals were just so thoughtful, and how even though she thought so, he never blamed her for why he felt so negatively toward himself.
He traced the lines connecting the constellation Columba. He needed to let her know what she meant. That she was important, and that he valued her and her company and her work. His resolve hardened, sitting up from his position so he may return to his space to sleep before he departs in the morning to wherever she may be.
He may not be ready to admit it to her, but Genji had admitted it with the stars above as his witness, He needed to let Angela know that she meant more to him that anything he has ever known.