Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Shit!”

“Fuck you, Kenji!”

“Can everyone please calm down? It’s just Mario Kart.” Ennoshita, the only sane person in the room, apparently, sighed exasperatedly.

Terushima and Futakuchi turned towards the other, equally enraged and horrified looks on their faces.

“O-or don’t, doesn’t matter to me. Carry on.”

“Did you just blue shell me?!” Futakuchi screeched as Terushima did just that, laughing like a maniac the whole time.

“Fuck yeah, I did!” He looked at him out of the corner of his eye. “Revenge is a bitch, Kenji.”

“What is it revenge for ?!”

“I’m bored,” Ennoshita complained.

“You guys wanna do something or something?” Terushima asked.

“Truth or dare?” Yahaba suggested.

“Works for me.” Futakuchi shrugged, pausing the race to scoot into the makeshift circle they had formed. Terushima did the same.

“So, who wants to start?”

“I'll go!” Terushima grinned, turning towards Shirabu. “Kenjirou, truth or dare?!”

“Truth, I guess.” He sighed, already looking incredibly done with this activity.

“Hmm, what would you say is… Shigeru’s most attractive feature?” He grinned at Shirabu’s disgusted look.

“Ugh.” He grimaced, before turning to scan Yahaba’s face. “Probably his eyes, I guess. They could be mistaken as pretty from a distance .”

Yahaba blinked. “Is that an insult or a compliment?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, then…”

“Alright, let's just do the next one, okay?” Ennoshita sighed.

“...Okay, then.”

“So! Kenjirou, it’s your turn.” Ennoshita said loudly, with an awkward laugh.

“Uh, all right. Kenji, truth or dare?”

“Truth. I don’t wanna end up with a crazy dare like that.”

“That was a truth…”

“Who's the best singer on your team?”

“Weird question, but definitely Mai. She has the voice of an angel , I'm tellin’ ya.” He smiled, looking like a proud dad. “Though Sakunami is also pretty incredible.”

“Who's Mai?” Ennoshita asked.

“Our manager.” He smiled. “Now, Yuuji. What’s your current dream?”

“To get an invisible tongue ring so I can surprise people when I make out with them.” He responded immediately, winking.

“I. Wow.” Futakuchi blinked. “Honestly, I'm not all that surprised.”

“Yeah, me neither.” Yahaba agreed.

“Now~,” Terushima got an evil smile on his face, “Shigeru. Truth or dare?”

“Dare!”

“Show us your secret talent. Everyone has one.” His smile morphed into a slightly less evil smirk. Slightly.

Yahaba shifted awkwardly. “Pass.”

“Aw, come on! Don’t be boring. ”

“It’s freaky! Well, at least according to my teammates.”

“Hey! I have an idea.” Ennoshita grinned. “Why don't we all share our secret talents? It might be fun, and make you feel better about yours.”

“Sure. I'll start.” Terushima grinned. “I can do a headstand.” He demonstrated by pushing himself up onto his hands and holding himself up for about 3 minutes.

“Kunimi can do better,” Yahaba muttered.

“Cool.” Shirabu nodded. “Kenji?”

“You act like you're not impressed. I practiced a lot to get that, y’know.” He pouted.

“Whatever.” He rolled his eyes. “Now, oh great Datekou captain.”

Futakuchi cleared his throat and smirked. “I'm very good at accents.”

“Woah, really?” Terushima leaned forward, starry-eyed, apparently forgetting about his reason to pout. “Show us, show us!”

“Sure, which one?”

“Hmm…” Ennoshita thought. “British?”

“Of course.” He stood up and did a small mock bow. “Hello, everyone, my name is Futakuchi Kenji, and I am from England.” He said in a perfect British accent.

Terushima gapped. “Dude, that-that is really sexy. What the fuck.”

“Thanks, babe.” He winked, sitting. “Fun fact: I actually tricked my senpai and classmates into thinking I was from England by speaking like that for an entire month nonstop when I was in my first year.”

(“ Man, the man is non-stop!” Was heard whispered by the Jozenji and Karasuno captains, to which the Seijoh captain gave them weird looks.)

“Nonstop?” Shirabu blinked. “How’d you go about that?”

“It was difficult, but I managed.” He shrugged, before grinning mischievously. “Man, you should’ve seen their faces when they realized I was faking the whole time! My drama teacher loves me now.”

Terushima scowled contemplatively. “Hmm. Wait, what if you’ve really just been faking having a Japanese accent, and you’re actually British?!”

Futakuchi smiled guiltily. “Well, Yuuji, you’ve caught me. The secret’s out. I am actually British.”

“I knew it! No one can be that attractive without being European!”

“That’s kinda rude,” Shirabu muttered.

“Yeah. Besides, Nishinoya and Kiyoko exist, and neither of them are European.” Ennoshita said nonchalantly.

Futakuchi’s eyebrows went up. “Oh? You find them attractive, huh?”

“I mean, it's kind of hard not to find Kiyoko at least a little bit hot. I mean, have you seen her?”

“I certainly have.” Terushima sighed.

“And Noya is just… well, he's Noya. He practically radiates charisma, it's hard not to notice the fact that he's attractive, y’know?”

“I see where you're coming from, yeah.” He shrugged.

“So, Kenji, wanna show us some more of those cool accents you can do?” Terushima grinned excitedly.

“Sure.” He abandoned the previous accent, talking normally. “I can a pretty okay American accent.”

“Show us,” Shirabu muttered, though he sounded almost bored.

“Aw, cmon, Kenjirou. You could at least sound more excited about it.” Yahaba scowled lightly.

“Fine.” He grinned a very fake looking grin, seemingly trying to imitate Terushima. “Show us, show us!”

Said captain looked at him with wide, unblinking eyes. “That was… weirdly cute.”

Shirabu’s next expression was one of contempt and malice. “Do not call me cute if you value your life.”

Terushima shivered. “O-okay…”

“So, Chikara. Do you have any secret talents or tricks?” Futakuchi, speaking in his aforementioned American accent, wiggled his eyebrows.

Ennoshita shifted a bit. “Uh, I’m kinda flexible, I guess. Is that really considered a party trick, though?”

“Show us anyway!” Terushima was positively glowing.

“Alright…” He got up, before bending backward, almost into a bridge, but not quite. Instead of his hands, he rested on his forearms, and then straightened his legs.

Yahaba sputtered. “Y-you can that kinda flexible?! What would you consider really flexible, then?!”

“Oh, this.” He stood up again, this time grabbing his leg and pulling his straight against his back. Yahaba believed it was called a ‘needle’.

“Wow… That’s pretty incredible, Chikara.” Futakuchi muttered, speaking in a British accent just to freak out Terushima.

Shirabu glared at him for that. “Stop being a shithead, Kenji.”

“Alright, fine.” He sighed. “Kenjirou? You got anything?”

“Tendou-san taught me how to juggle.”

“Sick! Can you show us?” Yahaba grinned.

“Sure. Got anything for me to juggle with ?” He cocked an eyebrow, holding out his hands expectantly.

“Oh, I think we have some plush balls somewhere in here…” Terushima muttered, digging around in the back of the room, before pulling out three red balls with a triumphant expression. “Here!”

“Only three?” Shirabu sniffed. “You mock me.”

“Okay!” Terushima grinned once again, digging around some more, and revealing three more balls, this time blue. “How many can you do at a time?”

“I’ve done 7 at one point, actually.” He took the balls, before tossing them in the air and began juggling all 6 at once.

Terushima was fascinated. “Wow, Kenjirou! That’s awesome!”

“Thanks.” He allowed himself a smirk, catching all balls except one, which landed on Ennoshita’s head with a small “Ow.”

“Now, I think the last one to not show us his talent is none other than our precious little Shigeru ,” Futakuchi smirked.

“First of all, don't call me little . I'm almost 6 feet tall.” Said boy scowled. “Second, like I said, my talent is kinda… freaky. I don't think you want to see it.” He shifted onto his knees.

“C’mon, Shigeru! Now you've got me curious.” Terushima pouted, leaning into his shoulder and nuzzling.

Yahaba’s eyebrows furrowed. “Are you trying to convince me by being cute…?”

He grinned innocently. “Maybe.”

Yahaba rolled his eyes. “Well, you've failed. I cannot be convinced by adorable boyfriends, sorry.” He suddenly looked off into the distance, as if remembering something, before shaking his head and scowling. “Nope. Cannot be convinced.”

“Really…?” Futakuchi murmured, leaning forward with a pout, activating his infamous puppy eyes. “Not even by two adorable boyfriends…?”

“Whoever said you guys were ‘adorable’?” He cocked a disbelieving eyebrow, though they could both tell his resolve was crumbling.

“We did, of course.” Terushima continued nuzzling him, and Futakuchi continued to give him puppy eyes, and eventually, even Shirabu and Ennoshita were nudging him and urging him to show his secret talent.

“Ugh, fine. I hate all of you.” He shifted onto his knees. “Now, name a random person. Preferably from one of your teams.”

“Are you planning to do some voodoo shit?” Futakuchi raised his eyebrow at him.

“What? No.” He shook his head disbelievingly. “Just name a person.”

“Tendou-san,” Shirabu responded immediately.

Terushima gave him a confused look. “Why him? Who even is that?”

“Isn't he that scary, intense guess blocker from your team?” Ennoshita asked. “I remember him from the game.”

“That's him, except he's not scary or intense. At most, he's slightly creepy.”

“Why him?”

“Whenever Semi-san asks that question, he's usually looking for someone to punch. And I very much enjoy watching Tendou-san get punched.” He smirked. “Kind of knee-jerk reaction.”

“It’s fine. I can work with it.” Yahaba shrugged, shifting again onto his knees.

‘ Work with what ?’

“Hey~, Kenjirou-kun.” He widened his eyes in an exaggerated ‘crazy’ expression, voice deepening slightly to do a pretty okay Tendou impression. “Working on your blocks lately…?”

Shirabu went wide eyed. “W-what the fuck…?” He said softly, but with a lot of emotion. “ How the fuck?”

“I dunno.” He shrugged, voice back to normal, before grinning boyishly. “But was it really that good? That was pretty half-assed.”

“H-half assed ?!” He sputtered. “W-well then, you better show me a good one!”

Terushima laced an arm around the setter’s shoulders. “That's Kenjirou for ‘I am very impressed and want to see more.’ Don't take it personally.” He winked.

“Get off of me, you literal personification of the first slice of bread!” Shirabu hissed, harshly shrugging off his arm.

“Hmph. No fun.” Terushima pouted.

“Now. As much as I loath to admit it, I actually found that… kind of cool.” He was practically seething as he spoke, something that simultaneously pissed off and amused Yahaba, “So, uh, I wouldn't mind seeing more…? Please let me stop.”

That was the last straw. Yahaba burst into loud, obnoxious laughter. “Oh my god…! I-I can't believe you actually admitted it!” Upon calming down, he smiled and asked, “So, who next?”

“Do someone in the room.” Ennoshita smiled, eyes twinkling with mischief. “How about Yuuji?”

“Huh? Did you say my name?” Said boy asked, looking up from where he had gotten distracted by a notification on his phone.

“Mm, Chikara wants me to do an impression of you.” Yahaba smiled mischievously.

Surprisingly, Terushima grinned and leaned forward in amusement. “So? You gonna do it or what?”

“Alright, alright. No need to get testy.” He cleared his throat, just for show, and spoke in what was actually a pretty good impression of the blonde’s voice, “Woo! It’s party time, y’all!”

“I do not say ‘y’all ’!” Terushima laughed, practically wheezing.

Futakuchi smirked. “Trust me, honey, you do.”

“You have no proof!”

“Actually!” Shirabu held up his index finger as he looked up something on his phone, revealing a text from Terushima.

‘ GUESS WHO JUST GOT ANOTHER BIRD YALL’

Ennoshita whistled lowly. “Damn, Kenjirou pulling out the receipts . I can see the headlines now. Shirabu Kenjirou, blackmail expert .”

“That was from like 3 months ago, that's invalid!” Terushima complained, pouting.

“Oh?” He cocked an eyebrow, apparently taking this statement as a challenge. “What about…” He scrolled a bit more through his phone, “last week, when you said, ‘ Y’all are stupid,’ in reference to us not being in prep classes while you are?”

“I was joking!”

“Doesn't change the fact that you said y’all,” Ennoshita smirked.

“There's nothing inherently wrong with the word, is there?” He sniffed.

“Well, aside from the fact that it makes you sound like you're from Texas…” Futakuchi drawled with a small smile.

“Oh, whatever.” He rolled his almond eyes, before turning to Yahaba. “Say, Shigeru, have you ever tried to do an impression of Kenji?”

“No, but I can certainly try.” He smiled, before clearing his throat and saying in his flawless Futakuchi impression, “Sup, losers, I am Futakuchi Kenji, and I am a total prick.”

“Damn, Yahaba! I didn’t know that was possible.” Futakuchi laughed.

“Y’know, I would’ve expected you to be more offended, considering he just called you a prick.” Shirabu snickered.

“I mean, I normally would be more offended, of course, but that’s just really fuckin’ cool.” He shrugged.

“C’mon, there's no way that was your first time doing an impression of Kenji. That was way too good.” Ennoshita scowled.

“Yeah, you're right. I lied.” He snickered. “I've done it a couple times before.”

“Knew it.”

“Hey, you boys should be getting to bed!” Terushima’s mother called out. “It's almost 3 AM!”

“Sorry, Mom!” Terushima called back. “We’ll sleep now!”

“Alright, time for bed, y’all.” He sighed, getting up to get ready.

“Are you just saying ‘y’all’ as much as possible out of spite, Yuuji?” Ennoshita asked, cocking an eyebrow.

“Yes.”

Bonus:

“Kenji, I remember Oikawa-san telling us you guys dated one time?”

“That's a story for another time, my dear Shigeru. Now go to bed.”

fin.