Chapter Text
…iiiiiiiiiii-
Luckily for you, Sans chose that instant to open the door; for a crazy moment you were so grateful that you felt the impulse to jump out of the water to hug him, then you noticed the very big and very very dead wolf monster he was carrying on his shoulder and your sudden enthusiasm screeched to a halt.
Unfortunately, screeching was something that Red was also fond of doing.
“MAMA!”
In the next second Red darted out of the water and Sans put the monster down just before he assaulted it.
“eat!”
“No Red wait! You just cleaned yourse… okay, never mind” you said dejectedly, watching him tearing into the raw meat and covering himself in purple blood.
You were never going to get used to this.
While you watched the same tiny mouth that only a few seconds before had called you “dad” now mauling hungrily something two times bigger than you, an itch in your Sansdar informed you that “mama” was currently staring quite insistently in your direction.
You knew exactly what he wanted.
“If you want a bath fill the pot with snow” you said pointing a finger at him before he could slither one inch toward you.
“there’s enough space for the two of us.”
He was right, but that was not the point.
“Nope. We already talked about this: I get my water and you get your water.”
“aren’t you supposed to be the kind one?”
“Sans, this water is dirty and barely lukewarm by now. You’re covered in dirt and purple blood and probably freezing. How is insisting that you wash in clean hot water not kind?”
That seemed to give him pause.
These were the moments where you found it hard to understand him: he was so smart most of the time, and then you had to explain to him something so basic and simple as “if you want to be warm and clean don’t get inside dirty and near cold water”.
Sighing, you reached for the cloth you usually used to dry off and covered yourself as you stepped out of the tub.
You probably flashed Sans in the meantime, but by now it wouldn’t have been the first time anyway.
“It’s better if you stay near the fireplace. Once I’m dry I’ll get the snow and we’ll get the bath ready for-”
Splash.
You just stared at the grinning lamia soaking lazily in your tub.
“-or you can freaking ignore everything I just said, I suppose.”
“care to join me?” he said extending a skeletal hand toward you.
“Heck no. Enjoy your dirty, cold and now bloody bath by yourself. It’s all yours.”
One hour later you were both sitting in front of the fireplace.
Or better yet you were sitting. Sans was wrapped around you while you tried and failed to keep his cold hands from burrowing under your clothes to touch the warm skin of your back. You cursed from the horrible freezing sensation, Sans laughed and then you sighed and began stroking his head (that was currently pressed to your chest), sharing your body warmth with him.
Behind you, Red was alternating between eating and napping.
“He’s always so hungry. Is it normal?”
“eh, don’t worry, it’s because he’s growing up. did he give you any trouble this morning?”
Welp, time to spill the beans.
“Uuhm… I think there may be a tiny problem.”
“what problem?” asked Sans drowsily.
“Re-” you interrupted yourself and looked behind you, where Red the now purple naga seemed totally immersed in his disgusting lunch. Still, kids had the obnoxious ability to hear everything they shouldn’t. “The kid thinks I’m his parent.”
Sans got very still around you.
“well”, he said carefully, “i can’t say that i blame him. it’s a logical conclusion.”
“It’s my fault, I should have thought about this. How are we going to explain it to him? If he begins calling me dad or mom how are we going to tell him to stop?”
When Sans answered you, he did it with a tone that on anyone else you would have defined hesitant.
“would it be so bad?”
You blinked and looked down at the top of his skull; the way he was facing prevented you from seeing his expression, though.
“What?”
“him calling you mom or dad. would it be bad?”
…
What?
“Well, it’s not the end of the world,” you said carefully, “I mean, okay, it’s just a word, I could simply not answer him if he calls me that or I could try to correct him, but he’ll still think…”
“so what if he does? you like him.”
You like him.
You like him.
“Are you kidding me? Of course I like him. I love him! But what about when you return to your home in the forest and he wants to know why I’m not coming with you?”
“don’t you think it’s a bit late for that? he’s already fond of you anyway.”
He’s already fond of you anyway.
Anyway.
The words burned their way inside of your chest and settled there like a poisonous snake.
“So I should make it worse by letting him believe I’m his parent?”
“no, you should, you know. stay with us.”
He was still not looking at you.
Really Sans? Still playing games even now?
Very well. He was not the only one who could play the dumb card.
“In the forest? Are you serious?”
“i mean here. we could stay here, or around here i guess, if you don’t want us in your home all year.”
“That doesn’t change the fact that he isn’t stupid and sooner or later he’ll realize that I can’t possibly be his parent, and what will we tell him?”
“that he’s adopted?”
“Why can’t you take this seriously?”
“why can’t you take it less seriously?”
“Because I can’t adopt a kid just like that! What if this summer or the next you find a naga you want to be with? Are you going to take Red away telling him you found a new mom or dad?”
Look at me, Sans!
“that’s not going to happen.”
Tell me why!
“You don’t know that!”
Say it, please.
“yes i do.”
Why?
A loud splash announced that Red had finished his meal and found his way back to the tub.
“mama! dad! no yell!”
“yeah dad, no yell.”
“Shut up, mama. I’m not done talking about this.”
Yeah, you weren’t done, but apparently Sans was, because he did exactly the same thing he did every time he didn’t want to speak about something: he fell promptly asleep.
That night you laid awake in the nest on Sans’ coils, with Red sleeping curled up on your chest.
You were not stupid.
Or, well, you hoped you weren’t.
Somewhere during your building friendship, you and Sans had begun tiptoeing around each other, and not about who got to bathe first or how much “Red” was a stupid name.
Friends didn’t sleep together every night all curled up in one bed (nest).
As a matter of fact, friends didn’t build their nests with the other’s clothes.
Friends didn’t try to bathe together.
A friend didn’t usually let the other see them naked or touch them under their clothes either.
And you were pretty sure that a friend wouldn’t lick the other’s neck.
You sighed and tried to find a better position without waking up neither Sans nor Red.
The thing was, you could find a perfect innocent answer for all the things you just mentioned: you were human and Sans was a naga, so your point of view was different. He was naked all the time, so why would your unclothed body upset him? He was always cold, so of course you slept together and he tried to touch your warm skin. Snakes used the tongue to catch smells, so of course a naga would do the same. You were kind, so of course you let him do all he needed to stay healthy and comfortable.
But, as you said before, you were not stupid.
Sans didn’t look at you like you were his bestie.
You didn’t feel particularly friendly when he put his face in the crook of your neck while sleeping.
Your first thought wasn’t “Wow, he’s such a good friend!” when he took a slice from the dried tomato you were cutting and slowly fed it to you while staring intently at your lips.
As you were sure “friend” wasn’t the word Sans applied to you in his mind every time you massaged his bones and tail with your hands coated in your soothing aura.
Neither of you had ever said or done anything explicit: he didn’t call you “hot stuff”, you didn’t offer to make your massages a “complete experience”, he didn’t let his hands wander down your pants, you didn’t lick him back and he didn’t wave around sausages making puns about snake junks.
In fact, today’s argument had been the closest either of you had ever been to mention the growing strange tension between you two.
Why?
Was it because there was Red around?
Who were you kidding, the little noodle of anger and purrs was already calling you dad, so you smooching his “mama” would not be strange from his point of view.
Also, this thing between you and Sans started before Red was even born.
Was it because you were from different species?
Well, cultural misunderstanding was surely a thing that could happen, but you were pretty sure that “bedroom eyes” was a language everyone spoke without any difficulty, and both you and Sans were apparently very fluent in it.
To be honest, bones and scales were not the first things that jumped on your mind when thinking about sexiness, not mentioning the fact that he was big and poisonous and probably built especially to eat other big things. Like humans.
The same went for Sans: physically speaking, for him you were probably like a noisy slice of cake that walked around on two legs, so not exactly romance material.
So, why were you attracted to him?
Well, for starters he had a very deep voice that sent shivers down your back whenever he managed to abstain from his damned puns.
He was also very smart: you spent many snowy days just talking about the forest and its inhabitants, about the stars, about human culture; after witnessing on a couple of occasions the way he looked at the few books you had in your house, you had proposed to teach him how to read, and after only two days he was already able to do it much faster than you.
He kept you safe from other monsters, he was a loving father in his own way and, even if it pained you greatly to admit it, he was funny.
So why neither of you was able to make a decisive move or say something explicit?
You turned around once more, keeping a steadying hand on Red to avoid jostling him too much, and ended up with him grumbling in his sleep and coiling himself around your arm, slithering up your sleeve and settling his head on your chest.
Your new position put you face to face with Sans, both of you using one of his coils as a cushion.
His regular breathing lulled you to sleep before you could find an answer to your own question.