Chapter Text
Lance was trying to find Hunk, but it seems that Pidge found him first. “Stupid childproof caps!” Hunk shouts as he tries to desperately open a pill bottle. Pidge comes to the bathroom and laughs when she sees Hunk. “Aww, is Hunk going to cry?” Pidge mocked and made a crying motion with her hands. “You don’t deserve to live, it should’ve been you, not Allura, James or Ryan!” Pidge says and snickers, Hunk starts to sob. Pidge rolls her eyes and takes the bottle from Hunk, and opens it with only a little difficulty. “Here, have a sedative!” She shouts and pushes the pill bottle to his hand again. “Go on and whine, you’re so pathetic!” Pidge exclaims and chuckles.
“Your ass is off the team, so you can bitch and moan all you want,” Pidge says rolling her eyes, and Hunk looks at her with wide eyes. “You don’t deserve to dream, and let’s be honest: you’re going to die alone, pathetic,” Pidge says and leaves the bathroom, leaving a sobbing Hunk with an empty pill bottle in hand. Lance runs inside and pushes Pidge out of the way. When he sees Hunk he immediately goes over and knocks the pills out his hands and helps him to spit out the rest. “Suicide is a private thing, you know…” Hunk says and Lance sighs. “Throwing your life away to be a statistic in USA Today? It’s the least private thing I can think off.” Lance says and Hunk sniffles. “What about Allura? James and Ryan?” Hunk asks and Lance starts feeling super guilty again.
“If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you?” Lance asks and Hunk shrugs, “Probably.”. Lance sighs and hugs hunk. “If you were happy all the time, you wouldn’t be human. You’d be a game show host.” Lance says and chuckles. Hunk laughs sadly and sniffles again. “Thanks for coming after me,” he says and Lance nods. “Of course, I’m here for you…” Lance says and Hunk gets up to leave, leaving Lance alone to sit on the bathroom floor with the pills and the empty pill bottle.
Keith comes in and sits next to Lance on Keith’s bed. “You’re a genius! You know, you had me worried with your little confession but you pulled it off. Best place to hide: right in plain sight.” Keith says and puts an arm around Lance’s shoulders. Lance leans into the touch and says, “I wasn’t trying to hide.”. “But why’d you have to go and mess with Mcnamara? One more dead Paladin’s a good thing.” Keith says and Lance glares at him. “He’s my friend.” Lance simply says and takes a deep breath. “If he’s such a good friend, why let Duke live? The bitch who made Mcnamara want to die, nothing ever changes! Unless-”
“Hey! We are out of the “change” business! You promised, remember? I’m holding you to it-” Keith looks away from Lance. “Doesn’t it bother yuóu that Duke walks free doing the same old evil in the same old ways?” Keith asks and Lance glares at him. “Don’t talk away from me! You promised!” Lance complains and Big Bud Dean comes to Keith’s room and both of the teens turn to the door. “ “Gee pop, ever heard of knocking? I was playing grab-ass with my boyfriend.” “ He says and Keith sighs. “ “ Young man, you know the rules; when company's over, the bedroom door stays open.” “ Keith says and Big Bud Dean chuckles. “So the judge, god bless him, told those Glenn Miller groupies to slurp shit and die! You should’ve seen the fireworks, got it all on video. Loaded the upper floors with thermals, and set the whole thing off with a Norwegian in the boiler room. Kaboom! I’ll be right back, I’m gonna need my drawstring pants for this one.” Big bud dean says.
Just as he’s about to exit the room, Keith takes his gun out and shoots into the ceiling startling his dad and Lance. “Goddammit! NO firearms in the house!” His dad shouts, and Keith smirks while nodding. Lance turns to Keith with a shocked expression. “Why are you carrying a gun?” He asks and Keith chuckles. “It pisses off my dad, It’s funny.” Keith answers and Lance slaps his shoulder. “It’s not funny! None of this is funny!” Lance exclaims and gets off from the bed, and starts gathering his belongings. “Why are you carrying a gun?! You promised me!” Lance asks again and Keith stands up, still the gun in hand. “Hey, it’s a dangerous world,” Keith says and Lance glares at him. “Yeah, because of you! Don’t call me, don’t talk to me.” Lance says and goes to the door, but gets stopped when Keith grabs his arm. “Lance!” Keith says and Lance looks him in the eyes. “You don’t know right from wrong, we’re over,” Lance says and tries to get out of Keith’s hold. “No- wait Lance! This isn’t dangerous-” Keith starts but stops when he sees Lance’s scared expression, and he sees that he’s pointing his gun to Lance’s head. “Over!” Lance shouts and yanks his arms back. “But I love you!” Keith tries to reason but Lance just keeps walking. “FUCK!” Keith shouts and shoots again to the ceiling.
Keith walks over to Pidge and smirks. “I now know thee, thou clear spirit.” He says and Pidge turns around. “That’s from Moby Dick.” She says and Keith nods. “I appreciate a well-read woman.” He says and Pidge’s eyes drift to the envelope that in his hands. “What’s in the envelope?” She asks and Keith hand it to her. “You’re gonna want to see it.” Is all he says before Pidge opens the envelope, and quickly shuts it. “Oh shit.” She glares at him. “The tangible reminder that at around age six, I’m guessing. You and Romelle Dunnstock were friends.” Keith teases and Pidge is red from embarrassment. “Where did you get these? Did Lance give them to you? What do you want, money?” She asks and throws the envelope back to Keith, who just smiles. “A favor.” Pidge shakes her head. “N- No way.” She says and Keith shrugs. “I really love this one of you and Romelle in the bathtub together,” Keith says and shows her the picture. “These photos are ancient history. Nobody cares about the past. Nobody cares about Romelle Dumptruck!” Pidge exclaims and Keith just shrugs with his smirk widening.
Hunk and Lance are playing croquet. Pidge comes and smiles at them. “Hey, guys! Missed you after 8th period.” She exclaims and both the males roll their eyes. “Yeah, we were avoiding you,” Lance says and Hunk nods. “What you did sucked.” He said and Pidge rolled her eyes. “Fine. Skip the foreplay, sign this.” Pidge hands Lance a clipboard with a petition on it. “What’s this..?” Hunk asks and comes looking at the sheet over Lance’s shoulder. “It’s a petition to have MTV throw a spring break blowout in Westerberg in order to raise suicide awareness. I got everybody to sign. I’m going to make an inspirational speech about it at the pep rally tonight.” She explains and Lance shakes his head. “Ugh, count me out.” She says and Pidge rolls her eyes. “Ugh Lance, why are you pulling my dick? It was your boyfriend's idea after all.” She says and Lance raises an eyebrow. “Keith’s?” Lance asks and Pidge nods.
“Look, I don’t know what he’s up to but if you know what’s good for you, you’ll throw that clipboard away,” Lance says and hands it back and Pidge scoffs. “Not a chance. I’ll just fake your signature as I did with Romelle Dumptruck, she’s in no shape to sign after last night…” Pidge mumbles the last part. “What happened last night?” Lance asks and Pidge chuckles. “It was on the radio. She took a belly flop off the Old Mill bridge holding a suicide note.” Pidge says and Lance gasps. “Oh my god! Is she dead?” Lance asks and Pidge shakes her head. “Just some broken bones. Just another geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing miserably.” Pidge says rolling her eyes, and Lance’s eyes water. Out of the corner of his eyes, he sees the ghosts entering again- great. Just great.
“Yo bOy. Keep it together, we knew that you would come far.” They all say at the same time, and Lance shakes his head. “Now you’re truly a Paladin, really! Smell how gangsta you are!” They say again, and Lance closes his eyes and mutters ‘no’s over and over again. When he opens them, he’s suddenly at the hospital in front of Romelle’s hospital bed. She looks so wrecked. Lance collapses on to the bed and starts sobbing. “I’m so so sorry Romelle!” He chants over and over again, and gasps when he feels someone touch his shoulder. He turns around and sees the ghosts there. “Yo boy feeling a bit punchy? She’s not looking that well… Still, you’ve earned that red scrunchie. Come on, join Allura in hell!” They shout and Lance gets up from his spot and starts running away from the hospital room.
He ran all the way back home, and when he opens their front door, both of his parents are there, and they’re not looking happy. “Where have you been?” Mr. Sawyer asks and Lance looks down. “We’ve been worried sick! Your friend Keith dropped by and told us everything.” Mrs. Sawyer says and Lance looks at her in the eyes and asks, “Everything?!”. Both Sawyers nod. “Your depression? Your thoughts of suicide?!” Mr. Sawyer starts. “He even showed us your copy of Moby Dick!” Mrs. Sawyer says and Lance’s eyes open wide. She shows the copy to Lance, and Allura comes behind him. “He’s got your handwriting down cold.” She comments and Lance rolls his eyes. “Please honey! Talk to us!” Mrs. Sawyer tries to grab Lance’s arm so he wouldn’t leave, but Lance yanks it back immediately. “No, you’d never understand!” Lance shouts.
Because how should they understand, if Lance can’t understand himself. “Try me! I know it all seems impossibly dramatic.” Mrs. Sawyer tries again, and the jocks and Allura just laugh at her attempts. “Your problems seem like life and death -” She continues, and Lance wishes he could tell her the irony of that. “ I promise ! They’re not.” Promises mean nothing, no one ever keeps them. So why are they making them?! “You don’t know what my world looks like!” Lance shouts and runs the stairs up to his room. The ghosts following him. Lance gets to his room and slams the door closed. “Aghh!!” He screams and falls to his knees.