Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Date: November 1, 2021 10:15 P.M.
Subject: I Know You’re MDC

Dear Ms. Dupain-Cheng,
I’ll make this short. I know you’re MDC, famous fashion designer for French rockstar Jagged Stone as well as others such as Clara Nightingale. I know you hide this fact from the public. I know why. I don’t understand what good it does to your situation to keep your identity a secret but I also don’t care and hold no wish to out you. Though I must say your ability to create an alias leaves much to be desired.
However, I’m in need of your service and unfortunately it’s rather hard to obtain. While I don’t quite run exactly in the same circles as your usual clients, I assure you I am well within the means to afford any price you charge. So while this might not be how you’d normally meet a client you may treat it as though it is.
What I’m looking for are three different pieces in the realm of sweaters or jackets for my older brothers to be given to them as gifts for Christmas. I will attach a copy of their measurements to this email and pay half the sum upfront so you may purchase your materials which are expected to be of the highest quality. Please take into account that they must arrive in the United States before Christmas. I will also pay for the international shipping but any delay will not be tolerated.
Of course in addition to payment in full I will keep any knowledge of your identity to myself alone. I am not unreasonable. I look forward to your acceptance of this commission although I know it must be very late in Paris when I send this so I will await your response till tomorrow.
Any further correspondence may be sent to this address.
- D.W.

From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Date: November 2, 2021 4:30 A.M.
Subject: So You’re Blackmailing Me?

Dear Arthur’s little sister,
Are you really in a position to lecture me on my choice of alias?
Reading your email, I can only guess (notice that I’m admitting that this is merely a guess and not declaring my assumption as a fact) that you’re one of those people who always thinks they’re right. So I’ve decided to make a list of everything you assumed in your email.
1. You assumed that whatever information you found gave you not only an idea of why I’d go to such lengths to hide the fact that I’m MDC but also the feeling that you’d be able to better handle the situation than the person who actually lives in it.
2. You assumed that I would be asleep when I received your email.
3. You assumed there was a chance I’d ever consider using less than the best quality materials even if the project was for say, my BLACKMAILER.
4. You assumed I would overlook a detail like shipping. (Really? You’re the one who called me a famous fashion designer.)
5. You assumed that earning a “reasonable” commission from the person who decided to BLACKMAIL me was more preferable to me than simply dealing with the fallout of losing anonymity.
I’m not sure it is. I have nothing left to lose.
I’m also done giving my work to people who don’t deserve it.
If you decide to give your proposal another try, I would suggest starting by giving me something to call you other than D.W. It only succeeds in highlighting what you have in common with her character (immaturity).
Sincerely,
The Girl You Tried To Blackmail

Chapter Text

From the phone of Damian Wayne:

Chat Name: Father
Father: Have you come up with any ideas for Christmas?
Me: Yes, Father. I assure you I will not disappoint you.
Father: Damian, this isn’t a mission.

Chat Name: The Only Sane One
Me: Alfred, I’ve hit a bit of an obstacle in Operation Christmas.
The Only Sane One: Indeed, Master Damian? What seems to be the problem?
Me: The designer I hired is being unreasonable.
The Only Sane One: How so?
Me: She’s refusing to work with me.
The Only Sane One: I see. Why is that?
Me: She doesn’t like how I talk to her.
The Only Sane One: Master Damian, I trust you have remembered your manners.
Me: Yes, Alfred. Of course.
Me: The thing is I was a bit… blunt.
The Only Sane One: Indeed?
Me: Yes…
The Only Sane One: I see. It seems an apology is in order.
Me: I suppose.
Me: So how does one go about apologizing?
The Only Sane One: I would suggest cutting back on any bluntness, admitting fault, and a request for forgiveness and continuance of service.
The Only Sane One: You may also find added incentive to be particularly effective, perhaps offer aid in some way or a favor.
Me: I see.
Me: Thank you, Alfred.
The Only Sane One: Of course, Master Damian.

Google Search History:
Arthur’s Little Sister?
Success Rate Of Blackmailing
Apology Template

From the phone of Dick Grayson:

Chat Name: The Boys (Minus The Demon)
Jaybird: find anything?
Timmy: nope. she’s really good at hiding.
Jaybird: no idiot
Jaybird: take a break from stalking mdc and see if demon spawns hired someone to get our presents yet
Me: Should we help him? I know Damian’s difficult but I don’t want him to feel like we want him to go away.
Jaybird: but we do want him to go awayy…
Me: …
Jaybird: just for a little! cmon we cant keep going on like this
Timmy: he’s right.
Timmy: I mean we all know why he doesnt like me…
Jaybird: dont blame him
Timmy: and I cant fault him for hating Jason…
Jaybird: shut it replacement
Timmy: but he doesn’t even get along with you most days dick!
Timmy: he needs friends…
Jaybird: besides superbaby
Timmy: and he’s only just stopped terrorizing his classmates.
Jaybird: he doesnt have any people skills!
Me: You can’t fault him for that! You know what it was like for him growing up with freaking Talia for a mother.
Jaybird: we know dick but that doesnt change the fact that he needs to learn how to treat people and he hasnt in the seven years hes been home maybe the titans can teach him
Me: So what? We’re supposed to just ship him off to be someone else’s problem like his mother did? That’s BS!
Timmy: no of course not! we’re still his family! him being a titan won’t change that!
Me: Exactly! We’re his family! It’s our job to teach him and him not learning anything is on us.
Me: We didn’t send Jason off when he was sick from the Lazarus Pit and we’re not sending Damian away just because his mother messed him up so bad.
…
Jaybird: your right but if we tried to help him he wouldnt let us
Timmy: so what’re we supposed to do? I mean even if we did help him you know dad would see right past us.
Jaybird: then he gets sent away anyway and the demon spawn will hate us forever
Timmy: (shrugging emoji)
Me: Maybe we could just subtly steer him in the right direction?
Timmy: find out what he’s getting us and tell him if it sucks?
Jaybird: that could work
Timmy: I still can’t find anything on his computer.
Me: I’ll get Babs on to go through his phone.

Chat Name: Babs
Me: Oh wise one I beg thee to help me!
Babs: what do you want me to waste my time doing for you?
Me: Can you search Damian’s phone for anything that might be related to Christmas?
Babs: no
Me: plz?
Babs: why?
Me: We want to help him stay…
Babs: …
Babs: give me a sec
Me: Thank you!
Babs: don’t thank me yet I helped him encrypt his phone this is all I got
Babs: (screenshot of Damian’s search history)
Me: That’s not helpful.
Babs: not my problem

Chat Name: The Boys (Minus The Demon)
Me: This is all she found…
Timmy: i’m concerned.
Me: I think we’re all concerned Timmy…
Timmy: who is he blackmailing?
Jaybird: really? thats the only thing here that didnt suprise me
Jaybird: i think we should be more concerned that hes trying to apologize to someone
Me: Best not to think about that.
Timmy: agreed.
Jaybird: yup
Me: So this doesn’t help us…
Timmy: maybe we should ask alfred?
Jaybird: nooooo
Me: It’s worth a try.
Timmy: or three…

From the phone of Alfred Pennyworth:

Chat Name: Master Timothy
Master Timothy: Alfred, has Damian come to you for help with Xmas?
Me: There’s coffee in the kitchen, Master Tim.
Me: Next time, don’t run.

Chat Name: Master Richard
Master Richard: Have you heard anything from Damian about Christmas?
Me: I am not at liberty to say, Master Dick.
Master Richard: Please, Alfred. We just want to help.
Me: Master Bruce specifically said that Master Damian must complete this task on his own. Even I am not permitted to help him much.
Master Richard: Much?
Me: Yes. For example, I am allowed to help keep his progress private.
Master Richard: I see.
Master Richard: Thank you, Alfred.
Me: Have a good day, Master Dick.

Chat Name: Master Jason
Master Jason: Hey what’s the demon spawn getting us for xmas?
Me: Master Jason, why is one of my plates missing? You know, the ones of the finest quality imported from China.
Master Jason: I ddont know
Master Jason: let me go find it

Chat Name: Master Bruce
Master Bruce: Alfred, has there been any developments with Damian?
Me: Yes. I believe everything is working out as you wished Master Bruce.
Master Bruce: Very good.

From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Date: November 2, 2021 6:30 P.M.
Subject: An Apology

Dear Ms. Dupain-Cheng,
In my desperation it seems I have acted quite far out of line. You see, a lot is riding on my ability to procure adequate gifts for my brothers. If I fail, my father may send me away in order to teach me a lesson in social skills. My brothers are huge fans of yours (I will also admit your artistry is very impressive) and have, not for a lack of trying, been unable to find out who you are. I have no doubt that if I get them MDC originals for Christmas then I will be able to stay.
This does not excuse my previous email however. I will ruefully admit that I’m often told I assume too much but few people have been so effective in pointing this out to me as yourself. I admit my methods were morally and legally unjust. I apologize and request forgiveness. Perhaps you could overlook my rather offensive first email and we could start again.
As for the blackmailing, I meant it when I said I have no desire to reveal your identity. I won’t. I realize now that would only make my own situation worse (my brothers would probably kill me on your behalf) but that is not my only motivator. In my research I learned about your situation in school. I will agree that I do not know the truth of the matter as well as yourself but I have no wish to make anything worse. I suppose you may as well have made the best choices you could’ve as it seems your classmates refuse to see reason. That must be inconvenient.
If this, my first apology, or the promised monetary compensation are still not enough to persuade you to still allow me to order my brothers MDC originals perhaps I may offer my help as well. I may not know the situation like you but I do have resources you might find useful. After all, they did allow me to find your identity.
I’m looking forward to your reply without any expectations of when it will come. (I’m told sleep is important though.)
Damian W.

Chapter Text

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 3, 2021 4:30 P.M.
Subject: RE: An Apology

Dear Damian,
Thank you for the apology. It may have been rather short and you might not have plainly admitted that you did in fact blackmail me but for some reason I don’t think you’re being insincere. For once I think a lack of flowery words did you a favor. I wouldn’t have believed them.
However before I even consider helping you, I have a question for you. If your family wants to send you away, why are you so desperate to stay? You said that they’re concerned about your lack of people skills which I can honestly understand based off just your first email but is it really so bad that they’d send you away? I meant it when I said that I’m done giving my work to people who don’t deserve the time and effort I put into my pieces. I just want to make sure you’re not forced to buy people’s affections, especially your family’s. I had a friend once… let’s just say his father wasn’t the best.
I hope I’m not projecting my own experiences on you. It’s just taken me a long time to figure out what the difference is between doing someone a favor and being exploited. I don’t necessarily think that’s the case here though. You don’t strike me as the type of person who’d let themself be exploited. I guess I just want to know more about your situation because you already know so much about mine.
- Marinette
P.S. I’m sorry too for calling you immature. That apology alone means that you’re more mature than most of my classmates. Everything else in the email still stands though.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 3, 2021 1:15 P.M.
Subject: You’re Too Naive For Your Own Good

Dear Marinette,
You should really be more careful when dealing with strangers, especially if the first time they ever make contact is to blackmail you. I mean really, I apologize and now instead of merely accepting, you also wish to know whether I’m being mistreated by my family. You seem like you’d be the perfect target for online scammers. I can see how easy it would be for people to exploit your kindness. I’m not going to.
I should also take the time to point out that you shouldn’t believe everything you read. I mean yes, I was telling the truth: my father will send me away if I don’t succeed in greeting the right gifts but that could’ve easily been a fabricated story to mislead you.
Now, to answer your question. Why I want to stay is quite simple. I may lack sociality but that does not mean I am unfeeling. I like it here. I have no wish to be parted from my father and would like the opportunity to continue to make him proud. I have animals I don’t trust to be properly taken care of without me. Even though they test me, my idiot brothers have sometimes been helpful in teaching me some things. The idea of having to start the last seven years over from scratch simply because I have no desire to interact with the frustratingly difficult people around me does not attract me in the least.
I apologize. It seems like I got a bit far off from what you were really asking. I suppose it would help to give you a bit of backstory. My upbringing was unconventional to put it lightly. I was raised by my mother for the first ten years of my life and she’s the only family member I can honestly say exploits me. My father and brothers have helped me to see how truly bad her view on life was but it doesn’t change the fact that she raised me. I think the more trouble I have with my peers, the more they worry about how I’m adjusting to their way of life. In a way I can see why they would think sending me away would be good for me. I’d be part of a group that came from backgrounds at least in the realm of mine I suppose.
However, like I said before leaving holds no appeal to me. A month ago I got into another altercation with a classmate of mine and father decided that was the last straw. When I asked what I could do to avoid being sent away, he said I needed to put a legitimate effort into my relationships with the people around me. When I asked for an example, he proposed that I get my brothers “thoughtful gifts for Christmas.” I accepted the chance to stay and here we are.
I hope that satisfied your request and await your next move.
- Damian W.

Postscript: Rest assured, you will never get any “flowery” words from me.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 3, 2021 9:00 P.M.
Subject: Here’s What’s Going To Happen

Dear Damian,
I am going to make your brothers their dream sweaters/jackets, you’re going to pay me half the total upfront so that I can get the materials and rest assured knowing you’re not a internet scammers :), and your family is going to see the lengths you’re willing to go to stay with them. Sounds good?
Now, in your apology email you mentioned some “resources” that could help me with my class situation. Let’s shelve that for now. I was actually thinking about our emails and I realized something. In my first email to you I did something I haven’t done in years. I stood up for myself, and it worked! I mean you, Mr. It Was Totally Blackmailing But I Can’t Just Admit It Was Blackmailing, apologized!
You said it yourself: I’m too naive and you assume too much. I think we’d make a good team. I want you to teach me how I can handle my classmates on my own terms and well if I already got an apology out of you, maybe I can help you learn some people skills. Believe it or not, before I put too much trust in the wrong people I had quite a few really good friends. I was even class president…
It actually works out pretty well: I’ll help you stay in your good situation with your family and you’ll help me change my bad one with my class. What do you say?
I’m looking forward to your reply!
- Marinette

P.S. Did you really spell out postscript just so you could prove you know what it means?

Chapter Text

From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Date: November 3, 2021 5:00 P.M.
Subject: I Accept Your Terms

Dear Ms. Dupain-Cheng,
I do not delude myself into thinking we will be able to magically solve each other’s problems but it does seem as though we both lack certain qualities the other does not. If you’re offering the chance for me to stay where I am, I would be a fool not to take it and I am not a fool. If I can also help fix your unfortunate situation, I will do so.
Let me know where we go from here.
- Damian W.

From the phone of Marinette Dupain-Cheng:

The Ladyblog
A Retraction Of An Earlier Article Nov 4 2021
I’ve decided to take down an earlier article entitled “MDC Stole My Best Friend’s Designs!” following contact from the legal team of Jagged Stone. It was wrong of me to make accusations without proof and I will endeavor to provide evidence to back any claims I make on this blog in the future.
- Alya Cesaire, Creator of the Ladyblog

Chat Name: Aunt Penny
Aunt Penny: Are you sure you don’t want us to pursue any further action Marinette? That statement hardly seemed sincere and was not nearly sufficient considering all she’s claimed. We can help you know.
Me: It’s fine Aunt Penny. Anything else wouldn’t be worth the trouble. It’s not her fault anyway.
Aunt Penny: You know I don’t agree with that but okay, if you’re sure. Just remember the lawsuits have already been drafted.
Aunt Penny: By the way, Jagged’s suit was a real hit at the charity dinner. Not that we ever had a doubt. Have you been thinking about creating a new website?
Me: That’s great to hear. I’ll think about it, okay?
Aunt Penny: That’s good.

Chat Name: Alya
Alya: Girl, I know what you’re thinking but just because I had to post that statement doesn’t mean Lila’s lying. She just can’t release any proof because she wants to do the right thing and keep MDC’s identity a secret. She’s being the bigger person!
Me: She always is.
Alya: Don’t be like that! Please Marinette. Stop letting your jealousy cloud your judgement.

Chat Name: Uncle Jagged
Uncle Jagged: Pens told me that you dont want to sue i get it, lawsuits are totally not rock n’ roll but feeding that liar and her friends to fang is always an option!!!
Me: No, Uncle Jagged.
Uncle Jagged: fine…
Uncle Jagged: i got so much applause for your suit at the stuffy dinner btw.
Uncle Jagged: of course I told them all that my talented young niece made it.
Uncle Jagged: even had a billionaire’s son begging for a referral but dont worry i turned him down for you
Me: What?! Why?!
Uncle Jagged: trust me, Mari, he was totally not rock n’ roll. not rock n’ roll at all! just rude

Chat Name: Adrien
Adrien: Hey Marinette, did you see the apology on the Ladyblog?
Me: You mean the retraction?
Adrien: Well, yes.
Adrien: Look, Marinette, you’re not going to anything else right? She took it down.
Me: She took it down because “she had no proof” not because she knows Lila lied. She’s still convinced even after Jagged’s legal team got involved although we both know the truth.
Adrien: I'm sorry.
Adrien: Even my father feels bad, he knows how much rumors like that could damage an artist’s reputation especially without proof.
Adrien: But he’s still convinced Lila’s someone I need to associate with and if you try to expose her again it’s going to be like every other time and I don’t want things to get worse for you.
Adrien: I’m sorry Mari.
Adrien: I just can’t help you while my father’s still on her side.

Google Search History:
Gotham Charity Dinner 2021 Photos
Patricide but for uncles
What is it called when someone kills their uncle?
How to know if a friendship is toxic

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 5, 2021 5:05 P.M.
Subject: The Plan

Hey Damian!
Sorry for the delay in responding. I don’t know if you saw but MDC had a bit of a problem to deal with yesterday. So here’s how I see it. Our plan has two parts: the commission for your brothers and then us trying to help each other out with our people problems.
For the commission: You already gave me the measurements which I’m trusting are up to standard since I’m not flying to America any time soon. Next I need to know exactly what you want me to make for each of your brothers: Grayson, Todd, and Drake, the measurements say are their names right? Then I need to know who you think wants a sweater and who wants a jacket and your ideas for the design. I’ll draw up some designs based on the information and send them to you for approval with an estimate of the cost. (Normally I’d also send a non-disclosure agreement beforehand too but considering how this all started I’m guessing you’re not going to give me your real name for the paperwork, are you?) After they’re approved I’ll need you to deposit half the sum in my account (Information attached) and I’ll use it to buy the materials.
If I can get all of this done in the next week or so, it should leave me about a month to finish the pieces before sending them out (An address will not be optional fyi). Sounds good??
For the other part of our plan: the way I could see it going is when one of us has a problem we could use the other person for sort of a different perspective. It’s like in those cartoons when the character has those two little people on their shoulders, do you know what I’m talking about? One’s good, the other’s bad and they’re both telling the person to do different things. Not that you’re bad I mean and not that I just assumed that of the two of us you’d be the bad one… I’m not saying any of this right. I just mean it like I said before, I could learn a thing or time from someone who isn’t too concerned with pleasing everybody. (I didn’t mean that as an insult by the way. I actually find it kind of admirable.)
So, here’s an example of a situation I could use your opinion on: today I started to wonder if one of my friendships is no longer healthy anymore. I have this friend who is the only other person in our class that knows Lila’s lying. At first he convinced me that her lies weren’t hurting anybody and that as long as we both knew the truth then it didn’t matter what anybody else thought. Eventually, we both realized that that was no longer the case when she almost got me expelled, but by then she had convinced his father that I was a bad influence on him. So now he’s forced to play nice and keep her happy to please his father.
It’s hard because even though I know he knows she’s lying, he can’t tell anyone else so no one believes me when I try to tell them. Now she’s made good on her promise to turn everyone against me and so I have to deal with all her antics by myself while she stands by his side with the rest of the class. I know he’s in a bad position but it still doesn’t make me feel better when he texts me asking if I’m okay after something happens while at the same time whenever we’re with other people, he keeps his distance so she doesn’t report him to his father.
I guess I’m just tired of trying to make him feel better all the time. However, whenever I think about ending our friendship, I feel guilty because it’s really not his fault. His father wouldn’t hesitate to pull him from school and then we couldn’t be friends anyway. I feel like a good friend would stick by his side. I don’t know. What do you think, Damian?
I guess that’s just how I see this going then. I rant about whatever I’m having to deal with and you tell me if you agree with how I’m handling it and vice versa. You mention some type of incident with a classmate right? Do you want an outside opinion of that or has your family’s sufficed? Or is there anything else you could use some advice on? I guess we’re just making this up as we go. I mean I suppose there aren’t any rules about relationships that started with one person trying to blackmail the other, right? :P
Hope to hear from you soon! Love,
Marinette
P.S. If this is going to work, you can’t just ignore me when I call you out on being (for lack of a better word) snobbish, Mr. Postscript.

Chapter Text

From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Date: November 5, 2021 5:30 P.M.
Subject: RE: The Plan

Dear Marinette,
(Am I assuming too much by addressing you by your first name if you’ve already addressed me by mine? If so, that would be a little hypocritical, wouldn’t you agree?)
Just as a general rule, I probably won’t get any references you make to any kind of children’s show (I had to look up Arthur after your first email). Like I mentioned before, I lived with my mother for the first part of my life and the idea of her ever even considering letting me watch cartoons is laughable. I did look up what you were talking about however and it seems like you were describing when shows try to portray a person’s conscience by putting an angel and a devil on either of their shoulders. In that case, I would agree with your assessment: between the two of us, I would definitely not be the angel in this case.
I’m grateful for that fact too as it seems that your kindness has only helped you to be so easily taken advantage of by those closest to you. You asked me for my thoughts on your situation so I trust that you won’t hold anything I say against me (again) on account that the whole point of this is that my opinion will obviously contrast with yours.
Here’s how I see it: Your friend (although I hope you will choose not to call him that any longer) is simply not in a position to offer you friendship and so in any case he cannot be angry at you for not accepting whatever he can give. What are you, a dog? What can he expect, that you will come when he can call but accept being ignored the other half of the time? Surely you have more self respect than that if your first email to me meant anything.
As for feeling guilty, he chose to put his needs above yours, if he blames you for doing the same, then he is a hypocrite. He made his choice and he will have to face the consequences for it; in no way is any of that your fault.
After reading your last email, I must admit that it’s relief to see that you at least have some idea of how this will work because saying that all this is new to me would be a gross understatement. As for the aforementioned incident that started this whole ordeal, let’s just say my family’s lecturing on the subject more than sufficed. If I come across any situations that I could use another opinion on, I will let you know. I confess that writing to you is far more preferable than being chided by any of my idiot brothers.
On the subject of idiot brothers, for the commission, the sweaters would be for Grayson and Drake and the jacket for Todd. I trust your judgement when it comes to the designs and will be ready to give my disapproval should anything on the sketches seem off-putting. I look forward to seeing what you come up with. As for the NDA, I’m afraid you’re right in that I cannot oblige. I trust you understand.
Sincerely,
Damian W.

Postscript: Considering what happened the first time I ended an email to you with two initials, can you really blame me for not taking any chances, especially when you take into account my “snobbish” self, your word not mine, and the fact that my self-esteem is still suffering from your first email. I mean if you really want something to feel guilty about…

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 6, 2021 1:30 A.M.
Subject: That’s Not How This Works

Dear Damian,
I’m afraid that simply saying you “trust my judgement when it comes to the designs” is not going to do it. If I tried to design anything based on the information you gave me, all I would have to go on is that you want two sweaters and a jacket. Do you have any idea how many types of sweaters and jackets there are?
On top of that, didn’t your father say these gifts have to be sentimental? If you really want the pieces to be meaningful I’m going to need a lot more information on your brothers. Tell me about them. What kind of relationships do you have with them? How would you describe each of their aesthetics? Imagine what you think would be their ideal sweater or jacket and then describe it to me, the more details, the better okay?
As for what you said about my uh maybe-maybe not a friend, I won’t deny your thoughts were somewhat valid if not a little harsh. I just need some time to think it over. I guess, beyond the guilt, I’m having a little trouble moving on. I mean besides the fact that he’s practically my only friend left in the class, he was also the first boy I ever really liked. Once upon a time, I thought I was in love with him even… It all seems so silly now. I’m just struggling with the fact that so many people in my life aren’t who I thought they were. Anyway, I don’t need your opinion on any of that last stuff, okay? I think the rest is up to me and like I said, I need some time to figure this out.
Thanks for listening, Damian. You do have a way of putting things into perspective. Now please, give me a better understanding of what I need to make your brothers so we can get this show on the road. Love,
Marinette (Which you can call me!)

P.S. I like how you lectured me on how being kind allows people to take advantage of me and then proceeded to try and guilt trip me into ignoring your past misdeeds. Fyi, Mr. Postscript née Blackmailer? It didn’t work!

From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Date: November 6, 2021 5:30 P.M.
Subject: What The Hell Is An Aesthetic?

Dear Marinette,
I understand that I’m not a fashion designer myself but I really can’t see how much answering your questions would help with the design. How will knowing about my relationships with them help you make their clothes? If I tell you I don’t like one in particular, are you going to make theirs out of a scratchy material or something? Are you sure that question wasn’t posed out of curiosity because you gave me more insight on your personal life but I didn’t offer anything on mine? I assure you it’s nothing personal, I simply like my privacy.
As I’m sure you can guess from the subject line, I had a little trouble researching what aesthetics are because nothing seems to make sense. It’s as if a lot of people collectively decided to use a word wrong. I don’t know what you want me to say.
In hindsight, I can admit I didn’t really give you much to go on but in all honesty I think my brothers will probably freak out simply over the fact that they’ll get to have MDC originals. If I were to guess what they’d like, I’d say Drake could really do with something comfortable, Todd’s wardrobe consists mainly of biker jackets and I truly couldn’t see him wearing anything else, and Grayson? He’s the easiest to please but if we’re going for sentimental value I think a Christmas sweater would do, the tackier the better.
Is that enough to work on? Sincerely,
Damian

Postscript: Have you yet to realize that while you let your “friends” walk all over you, you seem to not let me get away with anything? Is it also too much to assume from your email that you’ve since discovered you can do better than your good-for-nothing friend?

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 7, 2021 12:01 A.M.
Subject: (Sigh)

Dear Damian,
No, that was not nearly enough to work on. All I have to go on at the moment is that Drake wants a comfy sweater, Todd’s fashion sense is limited to leather jackets, and Grayson wants a “tacky” Christmas sweater. I don’t even know where to start with that.
Now because it’s taking us so long just to sort out the basic details, I was going to suggest we exchange phone numbers to make things go a little faster but as it seems that you think I have nothing better to do than wonder about your personal life (I do by the way), I’m worried you’d accuse me of being a stalker. So, let me try to be a little more clear.
Sentimental value comes from using what you know about a person to give them something that would mean more to them personally than say a random stranger on the street. I can’t help you much with the design because I don’t have a relationship with your brothers. I don’t know them and I have no clue what they like or want. Still with me?
The reason I asked about relationships to them is because the more personal you make the gifts, the more thoughtful they’ll be considered and, here’s what your stake in this is, the more likely you are to not be sent away. I was looking for details like inside jokes, common interests between your siblings, maybe things you bonded over in the beginning. A lot of my inspiration and artistry comes from little small details expressed in the design through methods like stitching or embroidery.
I can now see that it might be hard for some people to know what might provoke inspiration. So I’ll start with some small specifics: What colors are their favorites? Hoods or no hoods? Zipper or buttons? Pockets? Like I mentioned before, it would be a really big help if we could set up a time and just hash this out through text messages. It’s important that we’re on the same page here. If you don’t like the first few rounds of designs, well then we’d really be cutting it close for time. I’d normally be doing this kind of a commission in person or at least over the phone or skype.
That being said, if it’s truly something you’re not comfortable with, we can totally find a way to make this work. Okay, Damian? Love,
Marinette

P.S. I’m beginning to see that there’s a difference between writing to you and dealing with my classmates. I don’t know if it’s because we’re not face to face or the fact that you’re still practically a stranger. Something about our emails makes me feel, I don’t know, self assured again, maybe your arrogant manner just trumps any restraint I’d otherwise have. And as for if I’ve learned I can do better (Now who’s more invested in the other’s social life?), you might be interested to know I’ve stopped replying to my no-longer-a-friend’s texts.

From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Date: November 7, 2021 6:30 A.M.
Subject: Let’s Get This Over With

Dear Marinette,
I see I may have overlooked a little when it comes to the designing process. I didn’t mean to insult you by saying your questions weren’t valid. In my defense, I may have been a bit frustrated after failing to learn what an aesthetic is (you still haven’t explained that by the way). I also think I’m beginning to understand what you mean about sentimental value and of course I want to maximize my chances of staying.
So, here’s my phone number: X-XXX-XXX-XXXX. I will make myself available today from 2:00-5:00 p.m. Gotham Standard Time which is 8:00-11:00 p.m. Paris time I believe. Does that work for you?
As for your smaller questions: Grayson’s favorite color is dark/ navy blue, Drake and Todd both like red and black. On the subject of hoods, possibly one for Drake’s sweater, perhaps the kind that has those ties that can be pulled to close it, and for Todd’s jacket, definitely. If a zipper or button is needed then zippers would be preferable. As for pockets, perhaps we could go over them later. I suppose it would depend on the design.
I trust this email was a little more helpful than the last few and look forward to your further contact, if the timing’s to your liking. Sincerely,
Damian

Postscript: I can’t say I entirely understand what you mean but our emails are definitely new territory for me as well. I couldn’t imagine talking to my classmates the way I write to you. While I am satisfied to see you made the right choice (with my suggestion mind you) about what to do about your no-longer-worth-a-thought peer, I find it quite misrepresentative for you to say I’m invested in your social life when this whole deal of ours was your idea in the first place.

Chapter Text

From the phone of Damian Wayne:

Chat Name: Unknown Number
Unknown Number: Hi, Damian? This is Marinette…
Me: You’re late.
Unknown Number: I know, I’m so sorry! There was a bit of an emergency…
Me: Oh?
Unknown Number: Yeah, sorry! I know you said you’d only be free for about another hour right? Can we work fast maybe?
Me: I suppose it’s better late than never, but in the future, know that I don’t tolerate tardiness.
Unknown Number: Look, things in Paris are kind of crazy right now. I can’t promise I won’t have to change plans unexpectedly but since we only have an hour to get things done, could we leave that talk for another time? I’ll try to let you know beforehand if something comes up. Okay?
Me: Fine, one second. I need to change your contact name.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, let me do yours too!
Me: Do I want to know what you put me in as?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I bet you could guess :)
Me: …
Me: It’s not Arthur’s little sister, right?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, it wasn’t! :P
Me: No.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes.
Me: Change it back!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You don’t even know what it was originally!
Me: Anything is better than that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Fine…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But that means you can’t complain about what it is since you’re the one who told me to change it back.
Me: Fine, I don’t even want to know.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But I do! What do you have me under?
Me: …
Me: Your initials.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Isn’t that a little too on the nose?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: (Not to mention totally uncreative)
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But also, what if your brothers see?
Me: Well, not those initials…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: ???
Me: Weren’t you the one who talked about how we only had an hour to do this?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right! Sorry! Are you ready for some fast questions?
Me: Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m going to start with Grayson’s sweater.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What in your opinion constitutes a “tacky Christmas sweater”?
Me: Aren’t you the fashion designer? Shouldn’t you know this?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, I can’t say “tacky” is a style I’ve had much experience in sooo…
Me: Right…
Me: Well I guess I’d imagine it’d have to have a lot of bright colors.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But you said Grayson likes navy blue, right?
Me: Right.
Me: Well before he liked navy blue, he used to wear a lot of neon red, yellow, and green.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
Me: You know, as a child.
Me: Plus they’re sort of Christmas colors in a way, right?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So when you said bright, you meant traffic-stoppingly bright?
Me: I suppose.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: While I can’t say I would have ever thought to put those colors together before, if he wore them as a child I guess they would have kind of a sentimental value, like a nostalgic factor.
Me: In a way, it’s like an inside joke too, I suppose.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: How so?
Me: Well, you see…
Me: After I moved in with my father, I needed clothes so I wore some of his.
Me: Well, they were clothes in his image.
Me: Of course, they weren’t hand-me-downs.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Huh. Whenever I pictured you, I can’t say it was in traffic light colors
Me: You picture me?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hahaha, no! Silly, it was only a figure of speech.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right! Well, we only have an hour so we better get back on track! I think the colors are a very good personal detail!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So beside those, what else makes it a tacky xmas sweater?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Do you want a holiday design? Like Santa or a reindeer?
Me: Perhaps?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Or are there any other images you’d think he’d appreciate more?
Me: Well…
Me: Maybe a bird?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: A bird? Like a penguin?
Me: No! Definitely not!
Me: A robin.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: A robin? Why?
Me: As a child he also really liked the superhero Robin.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh! Batman’s sidekick, right?
Me: He’s Batman’s partner!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right. Is that also where the traffic light colors come from?
Me: I suppose you could say that, yes
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, doesn’t he have a logo or something? Would that be what you want on the sweater?
Me: No, he’s an adult now, even if he doesn’t act like it.
Me: I think if the design’s the actual bird it would seem more subtle.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And thoughtful too! Less generic.
Me: I suppose so.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Cool, I’m starting to picture it. So do you actually want any Christmas aspects? Like do you want me to put a santa hat on the robin or maybe some wording on it like Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays?
Me: No, no santa hat and not “Merry Christmas” either.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay. Any text?
Me: Could you put “The First” on it?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I could… Why?
Me: Well, he is the oldest. So he was the first.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right, no that makes sense.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But I wonder…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey Damian, is your brother as… formal as you?
Me: No.
Me: Definitely not. He has no manners.
Me: Why?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, a lot of young people use the term OG now. Maybe he would like that more.
Me: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: It means like the original.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know, I think it actually stands for original gangster…
Me: I see.
Me: You know what, that’s actually very fitting.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Really?
Me: Yes. It seems like I should be grateful for not only your fashion expertise but also your knowledge of popular culture.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Thank you?
Me: Very well, is that all for Grayson?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Uh, just a few more things. So no Christmas details then?
Me: Nothing more than similarities in the colors and style.
Me: What I’m picturing, at first glance, one might think it looks like a tacky Christmas sweater but if they were to look closely, there wouldn’t be actual references to the holiday.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Got it!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So no hoods or pockets for this one?
Me: No. I think they’d be unnecessary.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay. Now, the main detail left is the thickness.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m going to have to knit this by hand so would you prefer I use a thin or thicker, fluffier yarn?
Me: I guess it would depend.
Me: Would a thicker material be scratchy?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: No, Damian. Nothing I make is scratchy.
Me: I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: The only differences would be a thicker yarn would make for a thicker and fluffier sweater and it would also be a bit warmer too.
Me: Oh well Gotham is pretty cold most of the time.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Gotham?
Me: It’s where my family lives. Well, Grayson also spends a lot of time in Blüdhaven.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, I see why you guys like Robin now! He and Batman are based in Gotham right?
Me: Yes.
Me: Paris doesn’t have any superheroes right?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh no, we do.
Me: I’m sorry, excuse me? I’ve never heard of any!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Ladybug and Cat Noir are the main ones.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And our mayor tries his best to keep it out of international news to keep tourism going.
Me: So you’re telling me that those outlandish stories on the Ladyblog are true?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Most of them, yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait, you read the Ladyblog?
Me: I came across it while I was doing research on you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see…
Me: Is this a joke? If there’s supervillains in Paris, why hasn’t the Justice League gotten involved?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I don’t know?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m not really the person to be asking about this stuff.
Me: Right, sorry. It’s just hard to believe.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, I get it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That’s actually why I was late today. There was an akuma attack earlier.
Me: What?!
Me: Are you okay?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh I’m fine, Ladybug’s powers reverse all the damage.
Me: …
Me: I think this is going to take some time to sink in.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right, well should we get back to the commission?
Me: Yes. Let’s.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, so you’d prefer the thicker material then?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: It will cost more by the way.
Me: Yes, and money is never an issue.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, then I think I have enough to get started on the sketch! I know we have two more brothers to go through but it’s getting late here and I still have some things to get done tonight…
Me: Of course.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Would you be free to talk some more same time tomorrow?
Me: I believe so.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’ll try my best to not be late this time. :)
Me: I understand now that it may be out of your control.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Unfortunately, but hey what can you do?
Me: Right.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: If you have any time before we talk again, I’ve been thinking it might help if there’s any reference pictures you could show me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know if you see anything online or in a store or even if there’s any pieces your brothers’ already own that you’d want me to take some inspiration from, could you maybe send me some pictures so I can have a better idea of what you’re looking for?
Me: I see. I’ll do my best.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That’s all I can ask! Goodnight, Damian! Talk to you tomorrow!
Me: Goodnight, Marinette.

Google Search History
What does P.S. stand for?
MDC
MDC Fashion Designer
The Ladyblog
Albert Einstein Human Stupidity Quote
What does fyi mean?
Aesthetic
What’s an aesthetic?
Aesthetic Urban Dictionary
How To Delete Search History
OG Urban Dictionary
Parisian Superheroes
Ladybug and Cat Noir
Ladyblog
What’s an akuma?
How To Get Paris News Updates

Chat Name: Father
Me: Father, were you aware that there are superheroes in Paris? Why hasn’t the Justice League done anything?!
Father: I’m sure the Justice League is monitoring the situation. There’s no cause for concern, son.
Me: Right. Of course, Father.

From the phone of Jason Todd:

Chat Name: The Boys (Minus The Demon)
replacement: ummm… sooo…
replacement: just walked into my room and guess what I see?
big bird: A mess?
replacement: no! the demon’s standing in front of my closet taking pictures of my clothes!
big bird: ?
Me: uh wat
big bird: How the hell was I supposed to guess that?
replacement: so then I ask him what he’s doing…
Me: anddddd
replacement: and he doesn’t even look at me but just says research…
replacement: ???
big bird: (shrugging emoji)
big bird: Maybe this is a good thing? I mean what if he is doing research for Christmas and actually paying attention to what we like?
replacement: okay???
Me: i dont know he has been acting weirder lately
Me: like when i came home he was glaring at his phone and kept checking it for like five min without noticing i was there
big bird: Oh!
big bird: I passed him in the hall earlier and get this: he was smiling at his phone as he typed!
Me: what1!!
replacement: why didn’t you warn us?!
big bird: Because guys? I’m pretty sure it wasn’t like a threatening smile. I think it was an actual like happy smile.
Me: yeah right! demon spawn doesnt know how to do that
replacement: do you know who he was texting?
Me: ?
big bird: No! And I didn’t want to ask…
replacement: well we need to figure it out.
Me: agreed
big bird: Unfortunately, because she helped him with the encryption, Babs can’t hack into his phone.
Me: well then well ned to steal it
Me: he has patrol with you guys tonight right
replacement: yes…
Me: ill get it from babs after you leave
replacement: good plan but we don’t know his password…
big bird: Oh, it’s I'm Batman!
Me: duh its im batman
replacement: ???
replacement: How do you know that?!
Me: like your password hasnt been it at one point
replacement: …
big bird: We’ve all been there!
Me: its practically a right of passage
replacement: *rite
Me: shut it replacement

Chat Name: carrot top
carrot top: do I even want to know why you stole the demon brat’s phone?
Me: uhhh no?
carrot top: great
carrot top: just make sure you return it before he gets back
carrot top: I have no wish to get stabbed with a katana tonight
Me: great thx babs!
carrot top: oh and by the way, its programmed to delete all unsaved data after five hours
Me: what!!!
Me: is there anyway you could retrieve his texts?
carrot top: of course I could!
carrot top: but Im not gonna
Me: why not???
carrot top: one word:
carrot top: katana
Me: fineee

From the phone of Damian Wayne:

Chat Name: T.G.Y.T.T.B.
Me: who is this?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Damian, it’s five in the morning.
Me: who are you and why are you texting this number?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Uh, it’s Marinette.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: remember me?
Me: hello, marinette.
Me: why are you in damians phone as t.g.y.t.t.b.?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: uh, I have no idea. it’s too early for this.
Me: so, tell me…
Me: what business do you have texting my brother?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: ???
T.G.Y.T.T.B: oh, you’re Damian’s brother then?
Me: Yes, i’m Jason.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: You mean Grayson?
Me: i think i know my own name
Me: but to answer your question grayson is our other brother
Me: demon spawn likes to call by our last names
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Oh I thought it was just more…
T.G.Y.T.T.B: nevermind
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Wait, Demon spawn?
Me: damian
T.G.Y.T.T.B: thats…
T.G.Y.T.T.B: ironic.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: and kinda mean
Me: trust me he loves it
T.G.Y.T.T.B: So which one are you, Todd or Drake?
Me: todd
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Wait, why do you guys have different last names?
Me: uh cause all of us were adopted except for damian
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Oh
Me: but back to my question
Me: why are you texting my brother?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Uh well I’m not…
T.G.Y.T.T.B: I wasn’t…
T.G.Y.T.T.B: I was trying to sleep…
T.G.Y.T.T.B: And then I was texting you sooo
Me: Right but you were texting him earlier right?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: What does it matter to you?
Me: What business do you have texting my brother?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: None of yours
Me: …
Me: Im his brother!
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Exactly, his brother.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Not his parent
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Not his warden
T.G.Y.T.T.B: So if you really want to know why I’m texting Damian, maybe you should ask him instead of stealing his phone and bothering innocent girls at five in the morning.
Me: well to be fair its only 11 over here
Me: how was I supposed to know?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: By talking to your brother instead of stealing his phone?
Me: how did you even know I stole it?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B: really?
Me: hey now
Me: im only doing this because im concerned
Me: the kids been acting weird lately
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Gee, I wonder why.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Do you think it maybe has something to do with the fact that you’re all threatening to send him away?
Me: he told you about that?!
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: So if that’s all, how about the next time you feel like sticking your head where it doesn’t belong, try talking to your brother first.
Me: wait
Me: can’t you give me anything to work with here?
Me: why did he tell you that he might be sent away? he barely mentions it
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Why does he even have to tell me in the first place? What kind of brother lets his sibling be shipped away?
Me: look
Me: you only know what damians told you
Me: there’s another side to the story.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: I’m sure there is.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: But Damian is my friend not you, so I don’t particularly care to hear what you have to say.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: To me, you’re just the person who wants to send my friend away even though you say he’s your brother.
Me: So you’re demon spawn’s friend?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: No, I’m Damian’s friend.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Good night, Jason.
Me: wait
Me: i don’t really want him to be sent away or anything
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Have you done anything to help him stay?
Me: i’m trying to right now.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: How is any of this helping him?
Me: my brothers and I are trying to figure out what’s he getting us for xmas so we can make sure its good enough to satisfy dad
T.G.Y.T.T.B: How about instead of that you have some faith in him and try to convince your father to stop threatening to send him away?
Me: our old man isnt really the type to change his mind
Me: again i dont want him to leave or anything but he does need to get better
Me: i mean hell he broke a kids hand! that stuffs gotta stop
T.G.Y.T.T.B: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B: WHAT?!
Me: i see he didn’t tell you that
Me: look hes my brother
Me: i dont want him gone but things cant keep going on like this
Me: i know your his friend but he has to change and our dad is just trying to do what he thinks is best for him
T.G.Y.T.T.B: That’s enough!
T.G.Y.T.T.B: I told you I didn’t want to hear from you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Damian’s my friend. He gets to decide what he tells me and when and it was very wrong of you to breach his trust like this. T.G.Y.T.T.B: Whatever Damian has done, it doesn’t mean you have the right to call him a demon and steal his phone. I want you to return it now.
Me: …
Me: your right
Me: im sorry.
Me: i guess we’re all just trying to do what’s best for him
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Maybe you should stop assuming you know what that is.
Me: i cant promise anything
Me: but im glad damian has you as friend
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Well…
T.G.Y.T.T.B: I’m glad that he has a brother who wants him to stay.
Me: he has three
T.G.Y.T.T.B: That’s even better.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Surely the three of you would be enough to change your father’s mind?
Me: its not as simply as that
Me: but i can promise you our dad wants whats best for damian too
T.G.Y.T.T.B: I’ll hold you to that promise.
Me: Im sure you will, spitfire.
T.G.Y.T.T.B: ?
Me: thats your nickname
T.G.Y.T.T.B: I see
T.G.Y.T.T.B: :)
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Maybe one day I’ll tell the very first nickname I gave your brother.
Me: anyway that day could be today?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Considering it’s now only eight o clock and you woke me up at five in the morning, no. I’m afraid not.
Me: wait
Me: it hasn’t already been three hours has it?
T.G.Y.T.T.B: It wouldn’t have been if you responded faster…
Me: uh oh
Me: crap crap crap
T.G.Y.T.T.B: What’s wrong?
Me: demon gonna kill me
Me: night sunshine
T.G.Y.T.T.B: Bye?

From the phone of Alfred Pennyworth:

Chat Name: Master Bruce
Master Bruce: Alfred, please hide as many of Damian’s weapons as you can.
Me: On it, Master Bruce. May I ask what happened?
Master Bruce: Jason stole Damian’s phone and used it to text one of Damian’s friends.
Me: Oh, I see.
Master Bruce: Hey, has Damian mentioned anything to you about a girl?
Me: A girl? No, not that I can recall, Master Bruce.
Me: Is that who Master Jason was texting?
Master Bruce: Yes, but I wasn’t aware Damian made any new friends.
Me: Neither was I. Perhaps he is progressing?
Master Bruce: I suppose we’ll see.
Me: Indeed.

Chapter Text

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I figured it out!
Mr. Postscript: What?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: The Girl You Tried To Blackmail
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That’s what T.G.Y.T.T.B. stands for right?
Mr. Postscript: Oh right. Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Your brother mentioned that’s what you put me under.
Mr. Postscript: I know.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So you read our conversation huh?
Mr. Postscript: I mean it was on my phone.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Look, I’m sorry. It wasn’t right for him to breach your trust like that.
Mr. Postscript: So you said.
Mr. Postscript: Did you mean it?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I meant all of it, every word.
Mr. Postscript: Even the part where you called me your friend?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Especially that part! :)
Mr. Postscript: Even now that you know about “the incident”?
Mr. Postscript: That I broke someone’s hand?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m sorry, Damian. I wish you could’ve told me that only when you were ready. Despite that you accused me of being nosy, I never wanted you to feel forced to talk about things you weren’t comfortable with.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You still don’t have to you know, not even now.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But as for your question, well I’m sure you had your reasons.
Mr. Postscript: Why do you think that?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Because the Damian I know never does anything without a reason.
Mr. Postscript: I guess.
Mr. Postscript: She just wouldn’t stop touching me!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What?
Mr. Postscript: I don’t know.
Mr. Postscript: Dick said she just had a crush on me or something.
Mr. Postscript: All I know is she wouldn’t stop touching my arm and didn’t back off when I snapped at her even though that usually works on all my other classmates.
Mr. Postscript: She reached up to touch my hair or something and I just…
Mr. Postscript: I lost it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian, you don’t have to explain.
Mr. Postscript: I know it’s hard to understand but where I grew up, there was no such things like hugs and hand holding, there was only fighting. If someone was close enough to touch you, that was dangerous.
Mr. Postscript: Even my mother and grandfather only touched me when we were training and that was never in what one would call an affectionate way…
Mr. Postscript: My father’s family isn’t overly affectionate either.
Mr. Postscript: Well except for Grayson, I think I flipped him the first time he tried to hug me, but my brothers and I are practically always sparring.
Mr. Postscript: So when she reached for me… I lost it.
Mr. Postscript: I felt like an animal afterward. It was like I had no control over myself.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: It wasn’t right for her to touch you, especially if you already told her no. It’s not your fault and I can’t believe your father would still force you to go away knowing why you did it!
Mr. Postscript: He doesn’t actually know, not that it would make a difference because either way, I overreacted.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What! Damian!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Of course it makes a difference!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You didn’t just decide to hurt someone unprovoked, you were defending yourself!
Mr. Postscript: Against what, Marinette? Messy hair?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian, you need to tell your father. He’s got it wrong.
Mr. Postscript: You don’t understand!
Mr. Postscript: My family, we’re in the public eye.
Mr. Postscript: Part of that comes with having to deal with… interest.
Mr. Postscript: Grayson and Todd and Drake…
Mr. Postscript: Well, let’s just say they don’t break fingers whenever women try to talk to them.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You were raised differently, Dami.
Mr. Postscript: Not for the last six years!
Mr. Postscript: I mean, I get it. You might not, but I really do.
Mr. Postscript: Ever since I met him and realized what kind of person he is, all I’ve ever wanted was for my father to be proud of me.
Mr. Postscript: It’s hard a lot of the time, because of how different my parents and their lifestyles are, especially when it comes to how to deal with people.
Mr. Postscript: But in that moment, all I had to do was not react.
Mr. Postscript: Or hell, just not break her damn hand.
Mr. Postscript: But I failed, myself and my father and his teachings.
Mr. Postscript: So you might not, but I do somewhat understand why he wants to send me away.
Mr. Postscript: Seven years is a long time to learn without progressing much and so I could see why he might think to change tactics.
Mr. Postscript: So now I’m just trying my best to honor our deal and show him I’m not completely hopeless.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You might not understand it but…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m proud of you.
Mr. Postscript: Marinette…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: No, I am and I know you probably don’t believe me so I’m going to get through to you the best way I know how…
Mr. Postscript: Oh?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 1. I’m proud of you for realizing and admitting you were wrong about how you went about contacting me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 2. I’m proud of you for apologizing to me even though it’s obvious you don’t do much of that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 3. I’m proud of you for trying your best to help me with the designs for your brothers even though it can be frustrating.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 4. I’m proud of you for trying your best with this Christmas project even if your relationship with your family’s a little strained at the moment.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 5. I’m proud of you for not killing your brother even after he stole your phone.
Mr. Postscript: I haven’t committed to a decision yet.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Shush! It’s very rude to interrupt someone’s list.
Mr. Postscript: Fine, go on.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I will!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 6. I’m proud of you for continuing to talk to me even though I called you Arthur’s little sister in my first email.
Mr. Postscript: Don’t remind me. It’s not like I had a choice.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian!!!
Mr. Postscript: Fine, fine! I won’t say anything again until you’re finished.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Great.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 7. I’m proud of you for keeping your mouth shut while I finish my list.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 8. I’m proud of you for persisting on writing out postscript because it’s just so like you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 9. I’m proud of you for sending me those reference pictures earlier even though I know this is all new to you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And lastly…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: 10. I’m proud of you for defending yourself (okay, even if it was a bit harshly) from someone who didn’t respect you enough to stop when you told them to.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And I’m proud to be your friend, Damian.
Mr. Postscript: Oh.
Mr. Postscript: Thank you, angel.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Angel?
Mr. Postscript: Well, if Todd gets to call you a nickname, then so can I!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, I’m not complaining!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Are you going to change my contact to that then?
Mr. Postscript: No!
Mr. Postscript: I mean, definitely not after I’ve been made aware that I need to be on guard against phone thieves.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, do you want to get started on Jason’s jacket then?
Mr. Postscript: If we must, angel.
Mr. Postscript: Maybe we can leave out any pockets so he has nowhere to put his phone?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: No, Damian, we’re not petty.
Mr. Postscript: I wouldn’t call it being petty but we can come back to the pockets later.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So first question…

Chapter Text

From the phone of Marinette Dupain-Cheng:

Chat Name: Mr. Postscript
Me: We’re getting nowhere with this!!!
Mr. Postscript: You don’t say…
Me: Your sarcasm isn’t helping.
Mr. Postscript: Well, it certainly can’t be hurting our progress seeing as we aren’t making any.
Me: Ughhhhh, Damian!!!
Mr. Postscript: What do you want me to do? It’s not my fault Todd isn’t exactly the sentimental type! Our only “inside jokes” are our attempts on the other’s life.
Me: Right.
Me: I just don’t see how we can get Grayson’s piece planned out so quickly and yet still not have even a single detail for Jasons besides knowing it needs to be a leather jacket!
Mr. Postscript: And that it won’t have any pockets.
Me: Not. Helping.
Me: Or happening.
Mr. Postscript: I don’t know what to say then.
Mr. Postscript: Grayson is quite possibly the easiest person on the planet to please alright? He’s the most emotional in the family and would probably always have been the easiest to design for.
Mr. Postscript: Todd, on the other hand, is difficult, in all meanings of the words.
Me: What do you mean by that?
Mr. Postscript: If you knew them, you’d see what I mean.
Mr. Postscript: It’s like this, if Grayson is the most annoyingly cheery and friendly person, then Todd would be his opposite: frustratingly angry and antagonistic.
Me: Huh, he didn’t seem like it when we talked.
Mr. Postscript: Need I remind you that you had a short exchange on a stolen phone?
Me: Right, sorry.
Me: But I get the comparison!
Me: Grayson = Brightly colored Xmas sweater Jason = Leather biker jacket worn by someone with a chip on his shoulder
Mr. Postscript: An apt description.
Me: He did seem to care about you though…
Me: He wants you to stay, they all do.
Mr. Postscript: I assure you that was news to me.
Me: Did you think they didn’t?
Mr. Postscript: I don’t know what I thought. Our family has never been particularly open with our feelings.
Me: Even Grayson? You say he’s emotional right?
Mr. Postscript: It’s hard to explain.
Me: Wanna try?
Mr. Postscript: Didn’t we just have a conversation about my complicated relationships? Do you really want to do this again so soon?
Me: I’m good to go. It’s really about if you want to.
Me: I’m not going to push, Damian. That’s not what I’m trying to do.
Mr. Postscript: What are you trying to do?
Me: I don’t know, understand? Listen? Like I told your brother, I do think of you as a friend.
Me: This doesn’t all have to be one long give and take exchange.
Mr. Postscript: Right.
Mr. Postscript: So we’re doing this.
Me: Not if you don’t want to!
Mr. Postscript: Stop the indecisiveness and concern, I’ve agreed alright!
Me: If you’re sure…
Mr. Postscript: Unlike you, I’m not in the habit of doing things I don’t want to.
Me: Whoa!
Me: Low blow! Foul!
Me: Foul I say!
Mr. Postscript: Sorry?
Mr. Postscript: I can’t tell if you’re kidding….
Me: I am! :)
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: You’re a dork.
Me: No, I’m an angel. You said so yourself!
Mr. Postscript: I’m regretting that now…
Me: Mhmmm, sure….
Mr. Postscript: Can we get back to my complicated family now?
Me: Great idea.
Mr. Postscript: Wait a moment.
Mr. Postscript: Was this all an attempt at reverse psychology?
Me: Well…
Me: If it was, I’d say it worked, wouldn’t you?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: You unnerve me sometimes.
Me: Really, why?
Mr. Postscript: You always seem to have the upperhand. I find myself often saying things I normally never would around you.
Me: I feel the same most of the time.
Me: I wish I could talk to my classmates the way I talk to you.
Mr. Postscript: Right, well I’m glad to see the feeling is mutual.
Mr. Postscript: Now as for my family…
Me: Okay, I’m listening.
Mr. Postscript: Right, well.
Mr. Postscript: Like I said, feelings aren’t addressed much in our family.
Mr. Postscript: It wasn’t like that in my mother’s family either I suppose.
Mr. Postscript: It’s hard to explain but I assume it’s because they’ve all been together longer.
Mr. Postscript: I don’t know. It’s like my family is talking and I’ll be right there and it’s like I’m only getting half the conversation. My brothers, they understand each other in a way I can’t seem to.
Mr. Postscript: I suppose it’s because they know each other’s histories or maybe it’s just because they’re better at understanding people than I am. What do people call it, reading between the lines?
Mr. Postscript: They may not get along together all the time but they can communicate well enough. I can’t seem to figure out when something’s a joke or not.
Mr. Postscript: It’s difficult to describe.
Mr. Postscript: Like you pointed out before, I also have trouble refraining from making assumptions and those do tend to lead me to the wrong conclusions a lot of the time as well.
Mr. Postscript: Grayson is the best at explaining things. I suppose it wouldn’t be wrong to say he is the most emotionally equipped of all of us.
Mr. Postscript: Except Alfred. Alfred surpasses all of us.
Me: Who’s Alfred?
Mr. Postscript: Our butler, but don’t let the title fool you. He’s family. He helped me apologize to you actually.
Me: Oh, that’s great. It seems like you have some allies at least, not to make it sound like a war or anything.
Mr. Postscript: That’s the problem: I shouldn’t need help. I hate feeling like a child who can’t understand when the adults are talking. I’m still on the outside even though that’s exactly where I started.
Me: Besides the communication issue, is there anything else that makes you feel like an outsider? Anything they do? Is that why you call by their last names?
Mr. Postscript: None of it’s intentional mind you. I am an outsider and all of their inside jokes and how they understand each other so well simply serves to remind me of that. I bet if I did start calling them their first names they would make a big deal about it, so no point in starting now.
Mr. Postscript: I mean all of it is one big reminder that even if I’m his only real son, he chose them and they chose this life. They’re his family and I’m the son he never knew existed that got dumped at his feet when I was ten. Neither of us had a choice in the matter.
Me: What about now? Does he choose to acknowledge you as a son now?
Mr. Postscript: Yes, although I keep proving to be more difficult than his other children despite my best efforts.
Me: That wasn’t your choice right? It’s cultural differences, not to mention that they’re all older.
Mr. Postscript: No but it’s my fault I haven’t managed the distance yet.
Me: It sounds like you didn’t have much of a choice in that matter either, how much you could change.
Mr. Postscript: Where are you going with all of this?
Me: What choices do you get to make, Damian? What do you want?
Mr. Postscript: I already told you, I want my father to be proud of me.
Me: So to do that you have to change? Be more like your brothers?
Mr. Postscript: I mean I must get better, grow, improve.
Me: Because you want your father to be proud of you, so you can be part of the family he had before you joined?
Me: Or because you want that for yourself?
Mr. Postscript: Can it not be all of the above?
Me: What’s the main reason? What drives you?
Mr. Postscript: Look, I don’t think you understand the situation, not everything relates to your own unfortunate situation okay? Can we just get back to Todd’s jacket?
Me: I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to push.
Me: I know I can be a bit preoccupied with my own situation but the thing is, Damian, I know what it’s like to need other people's validation okay? It’s not good and it’s not healthy.
Mr. Postscript: My father is nothing like your pathetic peers. He only wants what’s best for me.
Me: I think that’s true, but how can he know what that is when all you want is to please him?
Me: Look, it’s not my place to tell you what you want and should want but it seems like you haven’t had a lot of choices in your life and I’d hate to see you only continue to do what other people expect you to.
Mr. Postscript: I don’t feel like talking more about this right now. I need some time to think on the situation.
Mr. Postscript: Now can we get back to work on Todd’s jacket seeing as we’ve been talking for hours and have managed practically zero progress?
Me: Right, okay..
Me: Let’s start back at the simple stuff then: What does he like to do?
Mr. Postscript: Besides piss people off?
Me: …
Me: Yes, Damian, besides that.
Mr. Postscript: Nothing comes to mind.
Me: Any hobbies? Interests?
Mr. Postscript: Well, he likes guns.
Me: Guns?!
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
Me: …
Me: Like collecting guns?
Mr. Postscript: You could say that.
Me: Okay, well that’s a start.
Me: I could embroider some guns onto the front of the jacket or on the labels as a smaller detail? Would that work? I think it’d be pretty cool.
Mr. Postscript: It’s a bit difficult for me to picture but it sounds like a good idea, fitting at the very least. It might help seeing it drawn out first.
Me: Okay, well there we go. Somewhere to begin at least. Now, you said he likes the colors red and black right? Do you want the jacket to be one of those?
Mr. Postscript: Yes, that would be preferable.
Me: Give me a minute to think…
Me: So how about this? I think gold thread would be best for the stitching and then I’d recommend using black for the body so the designs will show up better. If you want, I could also use red fabric to line the inside of the jacket and wait, you wanted this to have a hood too right? I could use red fabric for the inside of that too.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: All of that sounds fitting, especially the red lining in the hood. I definitely approve the color placement..
Me: Great!
Me: I think that’s actually enough for me to draw up some designs with a few different styles of the jacket itself.
Me: Is there any way you could send me a picture of the kind of gun you’d want me to use as a model? I have no clue about that kind of thing…
Mr. Postscript: I can do that. He has two favorites so perhaps one on each side?
Me: Right, two favorite guns… sounds good. Symmetrical too.
Me: So, do you want to add any wording? I could make it subtle if he’s not the sentimental type, add it on with the embroidery.
Mr. Postscript: Hm, how about “Carpe Diem”? One word on the barrel of each gun.
Me: “Seize the day”? I love it.
Me: Oh, I can just picture it, it’ll look so good in gold thread on the black leather!
Mr. Postscript: Just to clarify, you won’t be using real leather, right?
Me: Of course not! I would never!
Mr. Postscript: Good, that’s good to hear.
Mr. Postscript: I’m actually vegan.
Me: Oh cool!
Mr. Postscript: Have you ever considered the lifestyle? It has many benefits, especially environmental.
Me: No, but I do try to limit my meat intake. Dairy is a little harder since we live in a bakery.
Mr. Postscript: Ah, I see.
Me: What made you decide to go vegan? Environmental reasons?
Mr. Postscript: Actually, I acquired a pet cow.
Me: You have a pet cow?!!!
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
Mr. Postscript: Would you like to see pictures?
Me: Yes!
Mr. Postscript: They’re on my computer so I’ll email them later.
Me: Cool! What’s their name?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: It’s B.C.
Me: Damian, please tell me you did not just give your cow an alias!
Mr. Postscript: Of course not, we call her that for short.
Me: Then what’s B.C. stand for?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Before Christmas
Me: Before Christmas? Really? Why???
Mr. Postscript: She was an early Christmas present.
Me: So you decided to name her Before Christmas?
Mr. Postscript: I was a child and uncreative.
Me: Well, as long as you admit it…
Mr. Postscript: Shouldn’t we get back to the commission? We’re almost out of time.
Me: Okay, I still don’t buy that name though so don’t think you got away with anything.
Mr. Postscript: I never do around you.
Me: So, back to the commission. As soon as you send me those pictures of the guns, I’ll have enough to do the first sketches. Then all we’ll have left will be Drake’s sweater, right?
Mr. Postscript: Yes, everything seems on track. Do you want to tackle Drake’s sweater tomorrow, same time?
Me: Sorry, I’m not able to tomorrow.
Mr. Postscript: Oh?
Me: Yeah, I’m meeting my class for an outing at the park after school.
Mr. Postscript: You still do those kinds of things?
Me: When I can.
Mr. Postscript: Why would you do that?
Me: I don’t know maybe because I don’t like being alone all the time if I can help it?
Mr. Postscript: It’s better to be alone than unappreciated.
Me: Can you honestly say you believe that, after everything you told me about your family?
Mr. Postscript: That’s different and you know it.
Me: Of course it is.
Me: Look, all I know is I’m trying my best to make things work. Sometimes things aren’t as simple as cutting all ties. Is it so wrong of me to try and salvage what I can of my friendships?
Mr. Postscript: No, it’s not. I didn’t mean to judge.
Mr. Postscript: I just hate seeing you having to crawl after them. It doesn’t seem like they're doing much to try and salvage anything.
Me: Look, Damian, I know I asked you to help me not be taken advantage of but I don’t want to completely lose faith in everyone okay? I don’t want to live like that, to always be so pessimistic. So just this once, can you let me look on the brightside? Please?
Mr. Postscript: Very well. We can message the day after tomorrow.
Me: Thank you.
Me: Oh and I’m almost done with the sketches for Grayson’s sweater so check your email sometime tomorrow okay and let me know which one you like best!
Mr. Postscript: I will.
Me: Great! Goodnight, Damian!
Mr. Postscript: Night, angel.

Google Search History
Tacky Christmas Sweaters
Who started making tacky xmas sweaters?
Audrey Bourgeois on tacky christmas sweaters
Gotham
Robin
Robin Batman
Gotham Superheroes
Gotham Vigilantes
Gotham Villains
Does it mean anything if a boy calls you angel?
How to not read too much into things
How to spot red flags
Where’s the barrel of a gun?
Gotham Gun Laws
Gotham Crime Rate

Chat Name: Alya
Me: Hey, I’m here! Where are you guys?
Alya: We’re in line getting popcorn.
Me: At the park?
Alya: No, at the movie theater…
Me: What?
Me: No, let me guess: Lila decided at the last minute that she wanted to see a movie and no one thought to tell me.
Alya: That’s not what happened! You always jump to blame Lila!
Me: No, then I guess Lila said she was going to let me know and conveniently forgot?
Alya: It’s not her fault Marinette. She gets memory lapses.
Me: Then why did she offer to be the one to tell me? Or rather why did you let her?
Alya: I’m sorry, okay! I forgot for a second.
Alya: Look, the movie’s going to start soon but we can hang out this weekend! Just the two of us if you want.
Me: I’m busy.
Alya: You’re always busy these days.
Me: Well, I wasn’t today or at least I made sure not to be.
Me: You should go. The movie’s starting.

Chat Name: Mr. Postscript
Me: Well, it turns out I am free to talk today after all.
Mr. Postscript: What happened?
Me: Why should I say? I don’t need you to me “I told you so.” I got it, okay?
Me: You were right.
Mr. Postscript: I wish I wasn’t.
Me: Really?
Me: You love being right.
Mr. Postscript: No, I merely detest being wrong.
Me: … really?
Mr. Postscript: Okay, I admit I do find some satisfaction in being acknowledged for my superior intellect, but I find none in this case, not when it comes at my friend's expense.
Me: Damian, I think that might be the nicest thing I’ve ever heard!
Mr. Postscript: Yes, well it’s painfully obvious your standards for that would be very low.
Mr. Postscript: Now, tell me what they did.
Me: Apparently Lila decided she wanted to see a movie at the last minute and forgot to tell me because of a “memory lapse”.
Mr. Postscript: That’s sick.
Mr. Postscript: How has no one thought to confirm anything she says? I mean faking illnesses like that, she can’t be mentally stable, Marinette. She could be dangerous.
Me: I know, especially considering we have a villain that preys on negative emotions to worry about but what else can I do? All the teachers and the principal believe her without proof.
Mr. Postscript: Haven’t you considered legal action? There’s proof of her numerous lies all over your classmate’s blog, not the least of which being her claim that you committed theft of intellectual property! That’s grounds for slander!
Me: I don’t like the idea of a lawsuit Damian. That would be so messy and with practically everyone believing her, not to mention that her mother is a diplomat, it wouldn’t be worth it. I’m not sure I’d win.
Mr. Postscript: You’d win. You’d be the only side with proof.
Mr. Postscript: Also, I’ve mentioned before that I have resources that would make failure unthinkable.
Me: Right, resources…
Me: Damian, you’re not into anything illegal right?
Mr. Postscript: What? Of course not! Where is this coming from?
Me: Well, you see…
Me: You live in the crime capital of the world, you mentioned before that you’re not like my usual clientele but still have the means to afford my services, you just told me that brother collects guns, and offered to use “resources” that would guarantee I’d win in court.
Me: So, um, yeah, I was getting kind of concerned.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Right, well when you put it like that, I can see how you might jump to that conclusion so allow me to put your mind at ease.
Mr. Postscript: When I said I wasn't like your normal clientele, I meant that I’m not a performer of any kind. My family’s fortune comes from a completely legal business owned by my father and old money he inherited when his parents died. The resources I refer to are our family’s lawyers and legal teams who would never stoop so low as to lose a lawsuit against a pathological liar whose claims are outrageous and well documented.
Me: Ohhh
Mr. Postscript: Other than that, Gotham, while crime infested, is a large city and many law-abiding citizens live here too. Todd is also one of them for the most part and he only uses his guns with rubber bullets for self defense because Gotham is still a dangerous place to live.
Me: I see, well that makes sense.
Me: He does have permits for his guns though right?
Mr. Postscript: Angel, no one has gun permits in Gotham, not even the police.
Me: Right, well…
Me: Sorry about that!
Mr. Postscript: It’s okay. I can see how it looked.
Mr. Postscript: Frankly, I’m more than a little relieved that you’re at least being somewhat careful considering we’re still friends that only talk online and who met when I tried to blackmail you.
Me: You know, I don’t hold that against you anymore.
Mr. Postscript: You should.
Me: I mean I could…
Me: but I don’t!
Mr. Postscript: You know…
Mr. Postscript: Your ability to forgive is commendable. I don’t think you’re wrong to practice it. I just hate that it allows people to hurt you like they did today.
Me: I’m not hurt, Damian.
Me: I mean sure I’m disappointed but honestly I don’t care that much anymore. I just thought it was worth a try.
Me: And anyways I find I enjoy talking to you more than any of the interactions I’ve had with my class of late. So I guess it all worked out for the better.
Mr. Postscript: I see.
Mr. Postscript: Is this that brightside you were talking about?
Me: Why, yes.
Me: Yes, it is.
Mr. Postscript: It’s nice.
Me: Isn’t it?
Mr. Postscript: They don’t know what they’re missing.
Me: They don’t need to.
Me: More for us.
Mr. Postscript: I find your reasoning sound.
Me: Hey, Damian? Thank you.
Mr. Postscript: For what?
Mr. Postscript: Not being a criminal?
Me: Haha, no!
Me: For making me feel better, for being my friend.
Mr. Postscript: Angel, if apologies were necessary, I’d owed you a thousand.
Me: Nooooo
Me: Maybe just a couple hundred?
Mr. Postscript: Funny.
Me: Oh, hey! Did you get a chance to look at the designs I sent?
Mr. Postscript: I did. Your talent really shows in your drawings. They all looked very good.
Mr. Postscript: I can just picture Grayson crying on Christmas morning.
Me: So, did you make a decision?
Me: Did you? Did you?
Mr. Postscript: I did.
Me: Sooooo, don’t hold your breath! Tell me!
Mr. Postscript: I’m partial to the one where the robin’s wearing sunglasses. I don’t why but it seems like it would fit Grayson.
Me: Yay! I was kind of hoping you’d choose that one too!
Me: One design done, two to go!
Me: Oh and got your pictures and have already started on the jacket! So now we just have to meet to go over Drake’s piece.
Mr. Postscript: We’re still on for tomorrow, right?
Me: Yes, sounds good!
Me: Oh, and Before Christmas is a beauty!
Mr. Postscript: What?
Mr. Postscript: Oh, right.
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
Mr. Postscript: Yes, she is.
Me: …
Me: Damian, you’re really bad with aliases.
Mr. Postscript: I took the “use the initials” idea from you.
Me: Fine. I guess that makes us both bad at aliases.
Mr. Postscript: I suppose, if it makes you feel better.
Me: I’m not the one who needs to feel better, Before Christmas.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Tell no one of this.
Me: Your secret’s safe with me, B.C.

Chat Name: The Child Prodigies (If you don’t look closely)
Me: Kagami, I saw the match online! You did so well! I’m sure even your mother couldn’t find anything to critique.
Gami: I’m afraid you severely underestimate her, Mari. It’s even worse now that I’m finally old enough to qualify for the Olympics, even if they are still three years away.
Me: Don’t listen to her! Well, not too much anyway. You were amazing!
Luka: She’s right. You did great, Kagami.
Gami: Enough about me, how did it go today?
Me: Well…
Luka: Oh no. What happened, melody?
Me: Nothing. They didn’t show up but it’s fine, really. I’m not even surprised anymore.
Gami: That doesn’t make it any better, Marinette.
Me: No really guys, I’m good. It all worked out in the end.
Luka: So what’d you end up doing?
Me: Just sat in the park and worked on a commision.
Gami: I suppose it was the one for the blackmailer then?
Me: Not this again!
Me: We’re way past that now, Kagami. He’s actually way better at friendship than blackmailing.
Gami: So you say, but if you would just give me a few moments to talk with him and verify that I’d be less concerned.
Me: I don’t want you scaring him off!
Luka: From what you’ve said, it sounds like he doesn’t scare easily.
Me: No, Luka, not you too!
Luka: We just care about you, Marinette and we’ve seen you hurt too many times. Besides, if he really is your friend like we are, wouldn’t it be good for us all to get along?
Me: …
Me: You’re going to guilt trip me into this, aren’t you?
Luka: No…
Gami: If we must.
Me: …
Me: You and him have so much in common.
Gami: I’d like to see that for myself.
Luka: So?
Me: Fine… I’ll ask but I make no promises okay? He might not agree.
Gami: He will if he knows what’s good for him.
Me: And no threats!
Luka: We’ll see.
Gami: No promises.

Chat Name: Mr. Postscript
Me: Hey Damian! So I know you’re probably really busy so I really don’t want to bother you or anything…
Mr. Postscript: No, it’s fine. I have about thirty minutes before my father expects me. What do you need?
Me: Need? Oh, nothing! It’s just my friends wanted to talk to you and I promised I’d ask but since you have to do something soon, it’s fine.
Mr. Postscript: Friends? What kinds of friends?
Mr. Postscript: Are they reading over your shoulder right now?
Me: What?! Oh, no!
Me: They aren’t a part of Lila’s posse or whatever. In fact, they’re not even in my class. I guess I just haven’t mentioned them yet because they have super busy careers and travel a lot now but we still talk all the time.
Me: I told them about you (nothing personal though) and uh how we met so they just wanted to make sure I was safe. I tried to tell them they have nothing to worry about but after everything with Lila… let’s just say they’re a little protective!
Mr. Postscript: Good.
Mr. Postscript: I’m glad you have some decent friends on your side.
Me: Me too! Well, since you’re busy I don’t want to make you late!
Mr. Postscript: Oh, it’s fine. I’m sure I have enough time to meet them. Did you want to do it over a group text?
Me: Oh, it’s okay! You don’t have to or anything!
Mr. Postscript: Seriously, angel, it’s fine. I mean it’s only fair since you had to put up with Todd for a conversation. I’m interested in meeting some of your other friends too.
Me: Right…
Me: Just give me a second to make the group chat.

Chat Name: The Child Prodigies (If you don’t look closely)
Me: You guys get ten questions max okay? He only has like twenty minutes.
Gami: Each?
Me: Total!
Luka: Hurry, melody, you said we only have a little time right?
Me: Fine.

Chat Name: All My Favorite People
Me: Okay, can you guys introduce yourselves?
Luka: Hey, man. I’m Luka.
Gami: Hello, you may address me as Kagami.
Mr. Postscript: Damian, pleasure to meet you both.
Luka: Ah, a formal one I see.
Gami: How much time do you have left so we may act accordingly?
Mr. Postscript: Actually, my father agreed to give me the night off from my duties so I could meet you and there’s still hours until dinner so I’m available till then.
Luka: Formal and a controlling father? Marinette, I think you have a type.
Me: LUKA!
Mr. Postscript: My father isn’t controlling, I merely have responsibilities that can’t be put off sometimes.
Me: Of course, Damian. They should be thankful you were able to get the night off at all especially since it’s only to satisfy their curiosity.
Luka: Right then, shall we begin? You ready?
Mr. Postscript: Of course.
Me: Remember, this isn’t an interrogation, you guys!
Gami: How old are you?
Mr. Postscript: Sixteen
Me: Huh, I figured something like that but I don’t think I ever asked before…
Luka: So that would put you in what grade?
Mr. Postscript: In the American schooling system, I would normally be in tenth grade and considered a sophomore but I skipped a grade and am now in my second to last year of secondary school.
Luka: A little wordy but okay.
Gami: Why’d you skip a grade?
Mr. Postscript: I was far ahead of my fellow classmates and found school boring and redundant so my father allowed me to knock a year off my plate.
Luka: Do you often resort to blackmailing to get your way?
Me: Luka!
Me: I told you we’re over it!
Mr. Postscript: It’s fine, Marinette. They’re right to be concerned. They care about you, do they not?
Luka: Of course, we do.
Gami: It’s not our affections in question.
Me: Um, I think you guys are taking this wayyy too seriously.
Gami: Nonsense, now answer the question.
Mr. Postscript: I can’t say I’ve ever tried that tactic before.
Mr. Postscript: Or ever will again.
Mr. Postscript: I did get a good friend out of it, however I doubt there are many people with Marinette’s ability to forgive so I wouldn’t take a chance on getting a result as favorable as this again.
Luka: Dang
Luka: That was a good answer
Gami: No, it wasn’t. It was satisfactory at best. Now, tell me, do you have any experience in fencing?
Me: Kagami, you can’t duel him.
Gami: We will see.
Mr. Postscript: Fencing? No. I’m more familiar with traditional swordplay.
Me: What? Really?!
Gami: Oh?
Gami: Weapon of choice?
Mr. Postscript: Katanna
Me: WHAT?!
Gami: I see.
Gami: Now, that is a good answer.
Luka: Really? Cause I don’t think Marinette needs any more weapon-wielding friends.
Gami: With that class of hers, the more the better.
Me: Kagami, no!
Mr. Postscript: Should you ever decide to launch an attack on those heathens, I would be happy to lend my sword.
Me: No no no! There will be no attacking with swords!
Luka: For now, let’s get back to the questions.
Luka: You’re going to pay Marinette in full for her services, right?
Mr. Postscript: Of course! What do you take me for, a thief?
Luka: It’s best to be certain, to make sure you know there are people who will hold you accountable.
Me: Luka, I said no threats!
Gami: Her class has taken advantage of her talents too many times to not be cautious. I can only imagine how much time and materials they’ve cost her over the years, thinking they shouldn’t have to pay because she was their friend.
Mr. Postscript: You didn’t mention this, Marinette.
Me: I mean I kind of did. Remember when I said I was done designing for people who didn’t deserve it? That’s what I meant.
Mr. Postscript: That’s criminal!
Me: It’s in the past, Damian. It’s my fault I let it go on too long.
Gami: Nonsense!
Luka: You know that’s not true Mari.
Me: Right, well, let’s just move on.
Mr. Postscript: Marinette, remember all those times you’ve told me it wasn’t my fault?
Me: Of course.
Mr. Postscript: Could see how your words might apply to this?
Me: …
Me: I guess.
Mr. Postscript: We can talk about it later. Next question?
Luka: What’s your favorite thing about Marinette?
Me: Why ask that?
Gami: Wait, it was my turn to ask a question.
Luka: Well, you went twice in a row before so I’m doing it now.
Mr. Postscript: How her kindness is another form of strength.
Me: What?
Mr. Postscript: I was raised to see kindness as a weakness, as a vulnerability. Nothing since then has done much to change my mind.
Mr. Postscript: Marinette’s kindness is unlike any I’ve encountered before although that isn’t saying much. I only wish people wouldn’t see it as a weakness and try to use it against her like I once did but they will find as I did that is not the case.
Me: …
Me: Thank you, Damian.
Me: That was really nice.
Luka: He said nothing but the truth, my melody.
Mr. Postscript: Melody?
Luka: Yes, it’s what I like to call Marinette.
Mr. Postscript: Oh, I see.
Mr. Postscript: How nice.
Mr. Postscript: I prefer to call her angel myself.
Luka: That’s very fitting. Marinette’s like a ray of sunshine.
Me: Stop, you guys. You’re embarrassing me.
Gami: Why? It’s all true.
Me: …
Me: I liked it better when you were interrogating each other!
Gami: Very well, we still have a question each left.
Mr. Postscript: A question each?
Luka: Marinette didn’t want us to scare you away so we were given a limit of ten questions each.
Mr. Postscript: Well, Marinette should know I don’t scare easily but as it happens I only have twenty minutes left till dinner, so fire away.
Gami: What are your intentions towards our Marinette?
Me: Gami!!!
Me: What the heck!
Mr. Postscript: I intend to be a good friend to her, to listen and respect her choices, to offer advice if it’s wanted, to pay her generously for her services and to support her however I can.
Luka: Is that all?
Mr. Postscript: For now, however I’m looking forward to building our relationship and to learning more about her.
Me: I am too.
Me: I mean learning more about you.
Me: I’m looking forward to learning more about you too!
Me: Right, so that was the last question!
Me: Thank you for putting up with this, Damian.
Luka: Wait, I don’t think that last one should count!
Gami: Agreed.
Me: Well, then you should’ve been more careful!
Mr. Postscript: I should get ready for dinner. It was interesting meeting you both, perhaps Marinette will one day let us talk again.
Luka: Here’s hoping.
Gami: I would not object to that.
Me: We’ll see. No promises.
Gami: Very well, goodnight everyone.
Luka: night!
Mr. Postscript: Goodnight.
Mr. Postscript: Go to sleep, Marinette.
Me: Okay, goodnight!

From the phone of Luka Couffaine:

Chat Name: Sempre piu
Me: You know, I think he just might be good enough for her.
Sempre piu: We will see.
Me: Come on.
Me: Admit that you like him, and that you like him for her.
Sempre piu: Well…
Sempre piu: He seems like someone who would not hesitate.
Me: She deserves that much. And more.
Me: It just seems like neither of them sees it yet.
Sempre piu: It will make it all the more stronger when they do.
Sempre piu: Already she talks to him in a way she never did to Adrien.
Me: We both know that was puppy love.
Sempre piu: Even so, she’s never felt so comfortable around a potential suitor before.
Me: Could she just not see him like that?
Sempre piu: You saw how she acted around him, how unsettled she was when we talked of her to him.
Me: No, you’re right.
Me: It’s just going to be hard waiting for them to figure it out.
Sempre piu: It’ll be worth it.
Sempre piu: Her happiness is worth it.
Me: Yes, it is.

From the phone of Lila Rossi:

Chat Name: My Agent
My Agent: Mister Agreste has been very pleased with your work so far. He would like to set up a meeting to go over your contract and continue your excellent relationship with the Agreste brand.
Me: I’m ready whenever.
My Agent: He will see you after your photoshoot this afternoon.
Me: I’ll be there!
My Agent: Good work, Miss Rossi. He’s very pleased.

Chapter Text

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Sent you an email for Jason’s jacket. Had an idea I think you might like.
Mr. Postscript: I see popular culture references strike again.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Is that a problem?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Cause I’m not even sure “Hit me with your best shot” would be considered a pop culture reference. I mean isn’t that song from like the 80’s?
Mr. Postscript: 1979 but I think it has less to do with when the source material was released and more with how often the reference is used in modern times, which in this case would be much too frequently.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Did google help you come to that conclusion?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: All online research must begin with the use of a search engine.
Mr. Postscript: At least I don’t use Wikipedia as a resource.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Everyone uses Wikipedia.
Mr. Postscript: Clearly not everyone.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Do you?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Of course! I even donate to them every now and then!
Mr. Postscript: I see.
Mr. Postscript: I’m beginning to reconsider our friendship.
Mr. Postscript: I just don’t know if I can forgive this egregious offense.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Really, Mr. Drama Queen? My friends and their interrogations won’t scare you off but my support of the largest archive of free information will?
Mr. Postscript: Your friends were perfectly in their rights to see if I was worthy of your friendship.
Mr. Postscript: I believe I passed the test.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You were great Damian! Honestly, thank you for putting up with them. Maybe you’re not as bad with people as you think.
Mr. Postscript: Yes, well it does help if they are more than three thousand miles away.
Mr. Postscript: There’s also the fact that I’ve admired Ms. Tsurgi’s fencing style for a while now which may have something to do with it. I’ve been following her career for years.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian, how do you know who she is? We never told you her last name.
Mr. Postscript: Right…
Mr. Postscript: It may have come up in my initial search for your identity.
Mr. Postscript: I don’t imagine there are many girls your age named Kagami who know how to fence, live in Paris, and have close ties to your class.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, that explains that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I mean it’s still pretty creepy mind you but I went into this friendship knowing how it started.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I guess it’s just weird to think that you know so much about me and I still know so little about you, not even your last name.
Mr. Postscript: You know more about me than anyone besides my family, angel. I wouldn’t want you knowing my last name to make you think differently.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Because you’re famous?
Mr. Postscript: In a way, yes.
Mr. Postscript: You could probably find out who I was if you wanted, you have enough information to work with but I wish you wouldn’t.
Mr. Postscript: I don’t think you’d like what you’d find.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Trust me, I know better than anyone that people sometimes only see what they want to. A little bad publicity won’t make me think differently of you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Besides, I already told your brother, Damian. You get to decide what you tell me and when.
Mr. Postscript: I should’ve given you the same choice. If I’d known the kind of person you were beforehand, I would’ve.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That’s the thing, you can’t know who people are before you get to know them.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You have to give people a chance, Dami.
Mr. Postscript: What if they end up being like Ms. Rossi?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: If we constantly think the worst of people, we’ll end up like Lila, calculating and manipulative.
Mr. Postscript: I suppose I see why you might think that.
Mr. Postscript: You know…
Mr. Postscript: If my family ever finds out how we met, I’d hate to have to deal with their disappointment. I think Todd already wants to adopt you.
Mr. Postscript: Be on alert for another phone theft.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, they may never know. After all, they’ll get these amazing gifts for Christmas that will obviously show a lot of thought and consideration.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: They’ll never suspect we had a rocky start.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But back to the subject of amazing gifts, do you like the wording? Is it not his style?
Mr. Postscript: Oh, Todd will love having that across his back.
Mr. Postscript: I just have a question about the “o” in shot. It’s supposed to be a target right?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes! Well sorta?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I want to make it look like a poker chip with a target on it.
Mr. Postscript: Oh. I can see that. Why a poker chip? I don’t recall it coming up in our earlier discussion.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I mean it did in a way.
Mr. Postscript: Oh? How so?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: The poker chip would be stitched on the back of his right shoulder meaning he’d have a chip on his shoulder.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I approve the design. The double meaning in your designs will be incredibly entertaining for me every time I see my brothers wearing them.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, like I said. Subtle details are my specialty. But I don’t recall any double meaning in Grayson’s design.
Mr. Postscript: Right.
Mr. Postscript: I stand corrected. I simply meant there are a lot of subtle details.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay! That reminds me! I’ve started Grayson’s sweater.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Just sent a progress update to your email.
Mr. Postscript: It’s looking exactly like your drawing. I approve the choice of yarn; the colors are appropriately vibrant.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Great!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So what were you thinking for Drake’s sweater?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I think I remember you mentioned a drawstring hood.
Mr. Postscript: I did, yes. However, I’ve been rethinking that idea.
Mr. Postscript: I can picture my family accusing me of trying to suffocate Drake.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, we wouldn’t want that!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know maybe the “hit me with your best shot” thing wasn’t the best idea either.
Mr. Postscript: It’s not that concerning with Todd. I’m sure he’ll just love that across his back. Drake and I have a more complicated history.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Didn’t you say your inside jokes with Jason were your attempts on each other’s lives?
Mr. Postscript: Yes but it’s Jason. He antagonizes everyone.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Got it. But Drake’s different?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. Everyone loves Drake. Well, except for Todd but we’ve established that Todd hates everyone.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So why are things complicated between you too?
Mr. Postscript: Correction: Two
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know what? Okay. I stand corrected. Question still applies.
Mr. Postscript: I may have treated him poorly when I first joined the family. He was the most recent addition to my father’s collection of orphan children and I may have tried to claim his place in the family by forcibly removing him from it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see. So you felt threatened by his presence and handled it poorly?
Mr. Postscript: I would say that is a drastic yet not wholly inaccurate interpretation.
Mr. Postscript: However, I’ve since realized that my initial concerns were unnecessary. Drake is a threat to no one but himself.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But your family still holds it against you? They still think you might actually hurt him?
Mr. Postscript: Well, I was a bit extreme and while I no longer harbor the same intentions, no one could accuse us of being particularly warm.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Have you tried apologizing?
Mr. Postscript: You mean sincerely and not because father ordered me to?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes.
Mr. Postscript: Then no.
Mr. Postscript: However, before you begin what would surely be a fruitless campaign to get me to change that…
Mr. Postscript: Might I remind you my family isn’t big on addressing our feelings? I believe Todd’s tried to hurt Drake before too and I highly doubt he ever issued an apology yet they seem to be on good terms again.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, as your resident people skills instructor, I think I’m supposed to give you some kind of advice like two wrongs not making a right but frankly I’ve begun to realize that is utter bullshit, pardon my english. So I can understand why an apology would not be on the table.
Mr. Postscript: I’ve never understood that saying and I’m glad that I will not have to hear it from you.
Mr. Postscript: Do not mistake me, I understand the sentiment in a way however, I’ve always felt it to be too general and way too easy to use in a non-applicable, negative context.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Good to know where on the same page there.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian, I don’t mean to pry but can I ask you a question?
Mr. Postscript: You may ask and I may answer.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Do you feel like your family holds you to a higher standard?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I don’t know if I’d call it a higher standard.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I simply have more to catch up on. I started with less knowledge of some basic things than the rest of my brothers. However, I wouldn’t say I’m treated differently in any case. You should see Todd and father argue sometime.
Mr. Postscript: I just hate feeling behind. I’m used to being the best, the favorite like I was when I lived with my mother. So failing like I have recently has been frustrating, especially with what’s now on the line.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You mean the threat of moving?
Mr. Postscript: I wouldn’t call it a threat. I actually feel like I should mention that the place he wants to send me to is actually somewhere all my brothers have attended so it’s not like I’d be the first to go there in any case.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, so it’s like a family tradition?
Mr. Postscript: I suppose you could say that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So would going really be that bad?
Mr. Postscript: Honestly?
Mr. Postscript: In theory, it wouldn’t be the end of the world or anything. In actuality? I can’t imagine it would be pleasant.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay. If there’s one thing that makes you not want to go, what would it be?
Mr. Postscript: Is it not self-explanatory? Why would I want to start over again and lose all I’ve earned since coming here? I spent ten years of my life without my family, is it a crime to not want to waste any more?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, I would say that does sound rather awful to put it lightly but would it really be like that? I mean it’s not like you’re going off to war or anything, right? You’d still talk regularly and video chat and stuff?
Mr. Postscript: I’m sure we would, angel, but they’d still be here, all together and I’d be miles away, with only people I’d have no clue how to interact with for company.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Are you worried about feeling like an outsider again?
Mr. Postscript: No.
Mr. Postscript: Not quite…
Mr. Postscript: I’m more worried about feeling like a failure. Nothing is more shameful than being a disappointment. Especially when I have three brothers who aren’t even related to contend with that seem to be doing him proud.
Mr. Postscript: Except for Todd but he’s turned disappointing father into its own type of game and at which he’s winning.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Aren’t your brothers older than you? And haven’t they been with your dad longer? Surely it doesn’t make sense to compare yourself to them?
Mr. Postscript: Please!
Mr. Postscript: When Drake was my age, father was already training him to take over the family business.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian, in any case it’s not a competition, right? You’re not competing with them for your father’s regard.
Mr. Postscript: Maybe that’s so. I still feel like I’m losing and I hate that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, I imagine you would.
Mr. Postscript: How helpful.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I mean, you’re always allowed to feel how you do.
Mr. Postscript: Thank you for the permission. I do so appreciate it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, Mr. Sarcasm, do you really want to know what I think?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Go on.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, you might not want to hear this and of course this is just my opinion but it seems to me like you have really high expectations to meet, maybe they’re other people’s or maybe their your own. Whether or not you actually have to contend with your brother’s achievements, you obviously feel like you do and I can see how that would be hard to turn off. So maybe some distance from the situation would be a good thing?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I know that having to meet new people especially when socializing isn’t your strong suit sounds daunting but I kinda feel like you’re selling yourself short. Sure, you’ve had trouble in the past but you’ve made progress right? Moving to a new place doesn’t erase any of that. I get that the first time you had to start over was hard but now you’re older and wiser and have family to support you and a wonderful friend/moral compass to help you (aka me). Plus, I don’t know, it just feels like you’re really focused on doing what you think people expect of you and not what you really want for yourself. I don’t know, maybe some time away from expectations and legacies might give you some perspective.
Mr. Postscript: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
Mr. Postscript: Withdrawing now, giving up and moving on, wouldn’t that be like quitting? Is quitting not another form of losing?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: If you’re looking at it like that, I’d ask yourself this: Is winning worth it if you hate the game you’re playing?
Mr. Postscript: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So, totally overstepped there, didn’t I? Sorry!
Mr. Postscript: No need to apologize.
Mr. Postscript: I’m just not sure how I feel right now.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That’s okay! I’m not trying to force you to make any big decisions right now or anything. If you just want some time to think, that’s cool. Whatever you end up doing, you deserve to have a choice in it so let’s come up with something for Drake’s sweater so your dad doesn’t force your hand okay?
Mr. Postscript: Okay.
Mr. Postscript: Marinette?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes?
Mr. Postscript: Thank you.
Mr. Postscript: Everything you’ve done and said so far has shown a level of care for me I’ve done nothing to deserve and I know you’re always just trying to help me and I'm very grateful. I just want you to know I will do my best to be as good a friend to you too.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I know, Damian. You may have your faults (we all do) but loyalty is not one of them.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: For whatever it’s worth, I think your family also wants what’s best for you like I do. It just has to be up to you to decide what that is.
Mr. Postscript: Right.
Mr. Postscript: Well for starters, I think it would be best for me to avoid being accused of attempting to suffocate Drake.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, I agree.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So would you want just a regular sweater for him then? Or I could make a drawstring hood that doesn’t close completely? I could make it so there’s always a gap left to breathe through.
Mr. Postscript: I like that last idea best.
Mr. Postscript: My original vision was that Drake could easily shut out the world and fall asleep in it so we don’t have to deal with his insomniac coffee zombie antics all the time.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I want my business card to have “insomniac coffee zombie” on it.
Mr. Postscript: I highly doubt you’d get a lot of business that way. It’s a poor marketing strategy. It comes off as unprofessional.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Please, my clients are normally the reason I pull all nighters. I would give it credit for illustrating my dedication to my craft.
Mr. Postscript: Don’t get me started on Drake’s work ethic.
Mr. Postscript: The thought that you and Drake might actually have a lot in common is quite unsettling.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Really, anything else we share besides a coffee addiction and ambition?
Mr. Postscript: Well, you both are child prodigies in a way. For all our differences, I can’t deny Drake has done much for father’s company at a young age and you have created a whole brand for yourself at only sixteen.
Mr. Postscript: I’d never thought about the logistics of balancing schoolwork and commissions. Is it difficult?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I mean, yes and no. There have been times when I stretched myself too thin and paid the price in sleepless nights. But that’s the perks on being your own boss I guess. I just learned to pace the commissions and be selective with my clientele. It’s worked pretty good so far.
Mr. Postscript: That’s a relief to hear. However I hope my order didn’t come in a bad time. Did you already have a lot on your plate?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Nah, I usually keep the holiday season light so I have time to make Christmas gifts. Although, I suppose that’s not as much of a concern this year.
Mr. Postscript: Oh?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Quite a few classmates have been crossed from the Christmas list this year.
Mr. Postscript: I see.
Mr. Postscript: I don’t know whether I feel happy or upset for you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Ha! Me neither.
Mr. Postscript: I suppose it is both then. I am happy that you are standing up for yourself but upset that they have forced you to.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Thanks Damian. I can’t help but feel a bit like I’m being petty.
Mr. Postscript: Petty is a word people use when they hold you to a higher standard than themselves.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Now I want to put that on a t-shirt!
Mr. Postscript: Hm. I would order one.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Really? You’d match shirts with me?
Mr. Postscript: Well, no. I wouldn’t wear it around you per se, I don’t think I’d pull it off as well. However, I’d happily parade it in front of my brothers.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know what I’ll take it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Shelving that design for now, let’s get back to Drake’s sweater. So I got a general sense of his taste from the pictures you sent me although I already see I’ll have to take some liberties when it comes to fabric because these pieces don’t look like they were made particularly for comfort and that’s a priority here right?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. I trust your judgement when it comes to fabric.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Great! All that’s left is the design and for once I actually have an idea right off the back.
Mr. Postscript: Is that so? Consider me impressed.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, it all hinges on Drake being as big of a coffee lover as you make him out to be.
Mr. Postscript: Trust me angel, coffee addict is literally Drake’s personality. I don’t know how that’s possible but he managed it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay. It’s time then.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’ve had this idea in the back of my mind for a while now and I’ve never taken the time to fully develop it but if I pull it off it may well be the greatest piece I ever produce.
Mr. Postscript: And of course, it goes to Drake. He’ll never let that go.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’d hope not. He should feel honored to be the recipient.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: However, I'll need two things from you to make this work.
Mr. Postscript: Well?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’ll need you to take a picture of your brother’s coffee, after he’s poured and added whatever he adds (although if he’s truly a coffee addict that won’t be much).
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: It is CRUCIAL that you make sure to show me the exact shade he drinks, understand?
Mr. Postscript: Now you’re even starting to sound like him when he’s in a coffee-crazed state.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Do. You. Understand?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. I can do that. What else?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right, I’m gonna need you to trust me on this, okay? The design is going to be so much more than meets the eye so I’m not going to show you any drawing or photos before you get it in the mail, okay?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I know that’s kind of a lot to ask but I think you’ll understand why in the end.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I’m not going to pretend any of this isn’t ridiculously strange but since you obviously know what you’re doing and Drake actually loves a good mystery, I’ll allow it. Use your idea.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yay! You won’t regret it!
Mr. Postscript: So is that all you need?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yup, Grayson’s sweater is already started, I’ll go shopping for the materials for Jason’s jacket tomorrow, and Drake’s can be started as soon as I get that picture of the coffee.
Mr. Postscript: That won’t take long. I should have it to you by tomorrow at the latest.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Great!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Um, Damian. I really have to go. There’s an akuma.
Mr. Postscript: Yes. I got an alert. I signed up for them when you mentioned the situation. Is it close?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: it will be ill text you tomorrow okay?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. Be safe.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: thx bye1

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 10, 2021 7:00 P.M.
Subject: (No Subject)

Postscript: I would like you to know that I found your use of the phrase “Pardon my English” after swearing to be the pinnacle of comedy and would like to request permission to use this myself someday?
- Damian

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 11, 2021 7:30 A.M.
Subject: RE: (No Subject)

P.S. Permission granted. :)
- Marinette

Chapter Text

From the phone of Bruce Wayne:

Chat Name: Barbra Gordon
Barbra Gordon: Hey B, do you have a minute? There’s something you should see.
Me: Is this related to what we talked about earlier?
Barbra Gordon: Yes.
Me: I’ll be there soon.

Batcave - Gotham City, New Jersey
12:30 A.M., Nov. 11th

Bruce Wayne was well aware that taking his children out each night to fight crime in the deadliest city in America automatically disqualified him from ever winning a Father Of The Year award. However, as he looked around the meeting table at his sons, he wondered if there was ever any chance for him at all.

Dick Grayson, the first Robin and his first failure as a parent that had somehow turned out well anyway, was smiling around the table at his family like there was nowhere he’d rather be despite the fact that he’d had to make the commute from Blüdhaven on his night off while his ever increasing caseload was waiting for him back at the crappy apartment he called home.

Tim Drake was the son who others outside the family often considered to be his greatest pride, the one who he’d given so much responsibility to at such a young age. He was drinking coffee out of a thermos, larger than any seen before, working on a tablet Bruce couldn't remember the last time he’d put down, and occasionally glancing around the table as if wondering what would be so important to call a meeting on that he didn’t already know about.

Oh and his greatest failure as a father? Just walked in.

Jason Todd, the son he’d lost due to his own pride that had returned nothing like the child he was when he’d died, came up to the table swinging a gun around one finger that Bruce had since realized was never loaded like that, as if Jason’s self preservation just barely overrode his need for people to know he was not the boy they once knew. How long had it taken Bruce to figure that one out? Too long, too late.

As he’s not one for awkward silence, Jason calls out “What’d the demon do this time?” as soon he reached the others.

Which brings us to the most recent chapter of “Bruce Wayne’s adventures in being a horrible parent.” Best get started then.

“After the incident the other day,” Bruce gives Jason a look and gets a smirk in return, “I asked Barbra to look into Damian’s communications with the French girl.”

“Wait!” Jason cuts in, “You lecture me for going through his phone and then ask Carrot Top to read his messages? Gee, hypocrite much?”

“I’m sure Barbra would’ve monitored the situation regardless,” Jason scoffs at this and now it’s Dick who’s giving him a look. Bruce continues, “I only wanted her to notify me if she found anything concerning.”

He stands up to pass out the papers he’d brought with him. Normally, he’d just bring the files up on the BatComputer but Bruce Wayne is nothing if not addicted to self-punishment and he likes physical evidence of his shortcomings as a human being.

“These are excerpts from their messages over the last week or so.”

Since he’s already memorized everything in those packets and has every word imprinted in his mind, all that’s left to do is watch his sons read history repeating itself.

Tim, unsurprisingly, is the faster reader and as he goes through the papers, he has a look of confusion on his face that only intensifies as he goes on. Once he finishes, he takes a swig from his thermos like there’s alcohol in there instead of caffeine although with how he makes it, Bruce thinks it’d be equally strong either way. He then flips back to the start and begins to read it over again.

Dick’s smile is long gone by the end of the first page. As he reads on, the only way to describe his expression is heartbreak. His eyes become shiny and when Bruce sees this he can’t help but think it’s a miracle that the person who has been in this longer than everyone except him and Alfred can still manage to wear their heart on their sleeve in spite of the life they lead. His smile becomes a frown near the end.

Jason as always is the hardest for him to read. At some point early on, he stops spinning his gun around, placing it on the table as he hunches over to read closer to the papers. There’s a look of concentration on his face that Bruce hasn’t seen in a while along with something else. There’s an ache in his chest when he realizes that he doesn’t know this Jason well enough to know if it’s anger or pain. Once he’s done, he looks away from the table and stares off into space. Again, Bruce is unable to tell whether he’s just lost in thought or actively avoiding looking at them, him.

Dick is the first to break the silence,“That’s it! I’m moving back in.”

Bruce can’t decide if he’s relieved by the offer or angry at himself because he’s such a bad parent he needs his eldest son to raise his youngest.

Since this isn’t Dick’s first time making this particular statement, he expects Tim to shut him down like he normally does. When he turns to look at Tim however, Bruce finds him rereading the part he can easily identify as when Damian is explaining how he doesn’t hate Tim. He almost didn’t include it in the packets he distributed as he was sure Damian would not want them to find that out this way but something had compelled him to leave it in.

“So,” Jason starts and Bruce braces himself, “What’s the plan?”

They all turn to look at him expectantly.

“I brought you all here to get your opinions on what to do,” Bruce explains, trying to proceed with caution as he’s definitely the one responsible for this problem.

Jason lets out a bitter laugh, “No, of course you don’t have a plan already. Any one we come up with will probably involve you talking to your own kid and none of us would be here if you knew how to do that.”

“Jason!” Dick reprimands, sounding a little exhausted. It somewhat works and Jason goes back to ignoring them in favor of his thoughts. The damage is down however and Bruce will add that moment to the others he uses to remind himself of his mistakes.

“Where is Alfred? What does he have to say about all of this?” Dick asks and Jason’s attention shifts back to the table.

Bruce was not at all looking forward to dealing with the disappointment from the closest thing he has to a father figure, especially given how many times he had been encouraged by Alfred to talk to Damian, only to push it back time and time again.

He answers, “He’s making sure Damian stays asleep and away from the cave. I’ll fill him in on everything later.”

Stephanie and Cass were patrolling Gotham tonight, covering for Bruce and Tim who’s turn it had been when the meeting was called. Barbra was across the room, directing them as usual from the BatComputer. She would catch them up upon their return.

There’s silence once again only to be broken when Tim finally joins the discussion.

“Did Damian tell you why he broke that girl’s hand?” Tim asks Dick, the most likely of them to be confided in.

Once more, Dick looks heartbroken as he shakes his head.

“Please, did you even give him a chance to?” Jason asks while looking straight at Bruce as if he already knew the answer to that, and he did.

While his youngest son had been suffering from a lack of education about boundaries, Bruce has been busy doing damage control, never once asking what had provoked Damian. It seemed being the World’s Worst Father trumped the title of World’s Greatest Detective.

Dick too already knew the answer to that so he didn’t wait for a reply before continuing the conversation. “How did we never notice how his idea of boundaries was so warped?”

“It’s right here,” Tim answers, pointing at one of the papers. “Damian usually scared everyone off before they got too close so it never came up before. We were too focused on pushing him to make friends to notice the problem was more than just antisocialness.”

If Bruce wasn’t certain this was all his fault, he might take a moment to curse Talia once more for just how much his ex-lover had screwed up Damian’s ability to live a normal life.

“Somebody’s going to have to explain that to him. He can’t keep going on thinking we expect him to allow people to touch him without his permission,” Dick says, looking towards Bruce and not noticing Jason and Tim raising their eyebrows at that behind him. At least two of his sons seem to know him well enough to doubt the possibility of that conversation going successfully.

“Yeah, but like how do we explain the nuance to him? I mean, yeah that girl messed up but also most people would just brush her off. That’s what we would do. He can’t attack every person who reaches out for a handshake and think it all counts as self defense,” Tim adds. Dick and Bruce both look thoughtful at this.

Jason looks frustrated with them as he states, “You’re treating him like he’s a kid. I think even the demon spawn can tell the difference between a handshake and someone getting too handsy. You guys acting like he’s always seconds away from going into full assassin mode is part of the problem. Jeez, ever heard of a self-fulfilling prophecy?”

Bruce looks at his other two sons and finds Dick looking sheepish and Tim looking down at the table. He just sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose before deciding that of all his children, Jason might actually be the most qualified to tell him how he failed as a parent.

“What would you have me do then?”, he asks and for a moment Jason looks like he can’t decide whether or not the question is sincere.

“Well, I’d maybe start by not calling secret midnight meetings to talk about him behind his back,” he starts in a casual tone that is most definitely sarcastic, “Or no, actually let’s start by not going through his messages because you know at some point you’re going to have to sit down and talk to him about all this stuff and I doubt fessing up that you’ve invaded his privacy, compromised his safe space, and shared his deepest insecurities with almost the entire family will win you any brownie points.”

The other three people seated at the table freeze and take a moment to let that implication sink in. Bruce thinks he sees even Barbra wince across the room out of the corner of his eye.

Jason’s not finished yet. He continues, “You know exactly what you have to do, you knew before you called us and before you even read those messages. Yet for some reason you still keep approaching this as Batman when really the kid just needs his dad to talk to him sometimes like he’s more than just another problem for you to solve.”

That was the biggest difference Bruce could see in him. This Jason didn’t hesitate to go for the kill. While subtlety was more Bruce’s style, no one could deny it was brutally effective.

Avoiding the obvious barb, he tried to focus on the advice. Talk? He could do that. Although… Dick could probably do that better so maybe they should have him do it. He opens his mouth to suggest this but someone else is already speaking.

Dick’s saying, “Okay, I agree with that but it doesn’t look like B’s the only problem here. Little D seems to be feeling left out.”

Mistaking Dick’s meaning, Bruce recalls his reasons for keeping Damian away from Wayne Enterprise and wonders if perhaps he had been too quick in his decision making. There was no harm in letting Damian learn about the company.

Well as long as there was someone equipped to guide him.

“I’ll arrange an internship for him with Lucius Fox, or actually why not have him shadow you for a while, Tim? That might give you two a chance to see eye to eye on some things,” Bruce proposes.

Tim looks uncomfortable at this but lucky for him someone is already jumping to shoot down this idea.

“Oh hell no!” This is Jason of course. “When are you going to finally see this whole ‘I’ll just let other people handle my son’ thing ain’t working out? Did you even read these before making copies for everyone and their mother? Damian clearly still isn’t over you giving away his ‘birthright’ to the replacement,” Jason says, making finger quotes at birthright. “Making him shadow Tim would be like rubbing it in his face.”

“Yeah, second that. That should be something you introduce him to, like you did with Timmy,” Dick agrees, smiling encouragingly before going on to say, “Although that’s not what I was getting at. I meant that he feels left out in the family, not just with the company. I just knew he needed more brother bonding time!”

Both Tim and Jason grimace but it’s too late. No one can stop Dick Grayson when it comes to his family and so the last half of the meeting is just Dick mapping out his whole plan of ways to incorporate Damian more into the family including movie nights and a new group chat that’s not BatBusiness related.

Tim looks like he’s taking notes and pulls out his phone a couple times to cross check all their schedules because of course he has everyone’s on hand. Jason for the most part looks like he’s not paying attention at all only to then interrupt and shoot down an idea with very valid reasoning to back him up. Bruce just listens and follows their lead, only to be reminded every few minutes that he’ll also have to work on spending time with Damian on his own. He’s coming up with his own plan in his head that may or may not utilize some of their ideas as well.

They’re wrapping things up when Tim suddenly has a question. “What about the French girl? Should we be worried about her selling this to the tabloids?” he asks, holding up the messages.

Jason snorts and mutters something about bat paranoia although he is the only one to have personally talked to the girl and Bruce wonders if he would still share that sentiment if that weren’t the case. They all knew the lack of respect the media showed to their wish for privacy.

“No, she doesn’t seem to be cause for concern,” Bruce assures the other two, leaving out the fact that Ms. Dupain-Cheng didn’t even know his son’s last name. He knew that would only lead to more questions from them and since he’s already ruined so much, he refuses to also spoil the surprise Damian had in store for them for Christmas. He already made sure to have Barbra prevent the others, namely Tim, from accessing the rest of the messages as Bruce is positive he was planning to.

Sure enough, Tim gives him that look that directly translates to “Nevermind, I’ll look into it later”. Bruce doesn’t acknowledge it or encourage him.

Jason doesn’t seem satisfied with his response and launches his defense of the girl. “Yeah, no. None of you are allowed to mess with Spitfire. She seems like the only person the demon spawn’s got on his side that actually respects his boundaries. So don’t screw this up,” he finishes before getting up and leaving the cave, but not without a pointed look to Bruce. Tim follows after him, thermos and tablet in hand now alongside the packet of papers.

Bruce expects Dick to make his exit too so he doesn’t wait to do what he’s wanted to since this disaster of a meeting began which is bury his head in his hands and sigh. He’s surprised but doesn’t startle at the hand that lands on his shoulder.

“It’s not your fault,” Dick starts and Bruce just gives him a look.

“Yeah, okay so it’s kind of your fault,” he huffs out a small laugh before continuing, “But it’s not something he can’t come back from and it’s not an excuse for you to go into your ‘I’m a bad parent and my children are better off without me’ mode.” He’s the one getting the look now, the one that says “You know I’m right”.

And Bruce does know that yet he still feels the need to argue, “I-” is all he gets out before he’s cut off again, which may be good since he really didn’t know what he was going to say.

“Stop. Just stop, B. That kind of thinking is what got us to this point in the first place. Okay? Now the rest of us we get it now but Damian, he’s too young to figure out that you’re not rejecting him so much as trying to save him from yourself, for some stupid reason that I’m sure you think makes sense in your head. And yeah, I know you still feel guilty for how he spent his childhood, you know with the League and all but Bruce, at some point you’re just gonna have to get over yourself and realize he’s here now. He’s safe. He’s got us now and we’re going to fix this, alright?” Dick says, pleading and Bruce guesses he’s not the only one needing this pep talk at the moment.

So he says the only thing he can say to that which is, “Okay.”

Dick gives him a small smile and a pat on the shoulder before also making his leave, but not without saying goodbye to Barbra of course.

After he’s gone, Bruce feels a wave of exhaustion wash over him and decides to do what he so rarely does and leave whatever work he has left to go over for the morning. The talk with Alfred can wait till then too he figures.

He makes his way out of the cave and up to the manor. While the lights are on upstairs, there’s no sign of Alfred and no need to track him down at the moment so Bruce heads straight for his bedroom before stopping along the way in front of a door that’s not his own.

It’s been awhile since he’s done this and he’ll probably dwell on why that is later but he quietly opens the door and checks on his son, taking care not to wake him. For some reason unknown to them all, Damian almost never turns out his light when he sleeps so the picture Bruce gets is a clear one. His youngest is curled up on his side around his Great Dane, Titus while Alfred the Cat is sleeping at the foot of the bed. Bruce wonders if it’s also a coincidence that he’s angled toward the phone resting on his nightstand.

He used to do these late night check ins more often when Damian first came home. It took him a while to fully believe he’d had a child for so long that he hadn’t known existed so he’d check in every night as if afraid the boy would disappear. Even now, he’s still surprised by how young and untroubled Damian looks in his sleep. Not wanting to disturb the peaceful picture, he gently closes the door and heads to bed.

Wayne Manor - Gotham City, New Jersey
6:30 A.M., Nov. 11th

The first thing Damian always does when he wakes is take in his surroundings. This had first become the case in the early days after he had come to live with his father ,back when he would wake up forgetting he had left the League. It was why he refused to turn off his lights at night if he didn’t have to, despite being raised in the shadows and continuing to work in them to this day. It was now a subtle reminder to himself that he had escaped the past and a little act of rebellion against his upbringing.

Alfred the Cat was still sleeping at the foot of the bed but Titus was nowhere to be seen which meant Pennyworth had probably let him out already. He gives himself a few minutes to get his bearings before checking his phone. The only notification is for a sappy “Good morning! Have a good day at school!” text from Grayson which makes Damian wonder if he has what he’s heard other people refer to as “empty nest syndrome”, whatever that means. He also sees the texts he exchanged with Marinette the day before and in the privacy of his room, smiles while remembering parts of their conversations.

Twenty minutes later he heads down to breakfast, dressed in his school uniform with his phone in hand on a singular mission to get a picture of Drake’s coffee for the girl he… didn’t want to disappoint.

Chapter Text

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 11, 2021 7:15 A.M.
Subject: Drake’s Coffee (1 Attachment)

As requested:
(Image Attached)
- Damian

Postscript: I don’t suppose I get a clue as to what you need this for?

Mr. Postscript: Emailed the picture of Drake’s coffee.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Any questions asked? Are they onto us?
Mr. Postscript: I don’t believe so although I’m not certain.
Mr. Postscript: My siblings were acting really odd at breakfast.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: How so?
Mr. Postscript: They kept looking at me every few seconds throughout the meal. It was strange.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hmmm…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Maybe they were talking about you before you walked in and wanted to know if you’d heard?
Mr. Postscript: Why would you think that?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, obviously I wasn’t there but it reminds me of this one time I went to sit with my class at lunch and once I got to the table everyone immediately stopped talking. It was embarrassingly obvious why.
Mr. Postscript: Well, I don’t think that was the case here. I didn’t hear a conversation going on before I reached the kitchen.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay well maybe it’s just that kind of day. (shrugging emoji)
Mr. Postscript: I suppose that’s possible. We shall see.
Mr. Postscript: What’s the next step for the gifts?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So I'm leaving to go shopping for the jacket materials in about an hour or so. I might look at some stuff for Drake’s sweater too now that I have the picture but I’ll probably want to sketch that out first. I’ll make sure to send you an update soon.
Mr. Postscript: That sounds good. I have to leave for school now.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay! Have a good day!
Mr. Postscript: You too angel.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 12, 2021 8:05 P.M.
Subject: Progress Update (2 Attachments)

So I haven’t made that much progress on Dick’s sweater since the last update but it’s coming along well.
(Image Attached)
I’m really happy with the fabrics I found for Jason’s jacket. What do you think?
(Image Attached)
- Marinette

P.S. I see. So you’d like a hint? Well, let’s just say it’s going to be more than what meets the eye…

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Just sent the update. Everything back to normal with your brothers?
Mr. Postscript: Define normal.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Are they still acting strange?
Mr. Postscript: Well, they appear to be unusually excited.
Mr. Postscript: Apparently we’re having a “Family Movie Night” tomorrow although I have no clue why anyone thinks that’s a good idea.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That sounds like it could either be fun or tortuous. What movie are you guys watching?
Mr. Postscript: Hold on. Let me check.
Mr. Postscript: “Lilo & Stitch”
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: In my mind I’m just picturing you and your three older brothers (who have to be grown men if you’re sixteen, right?) crowded around the television watching a disney movie of all things.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I see. Well the choice of movie wasn’t mine obviously.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, I gathered that.
Mr. Postscript: Also, there will be no crowding around a television. We have a theater room so you may adjust the image in your head.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I forgot that you’re rich.
Mr. Postscript: Wealthy.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Loaded.
Mr. Postscript: Affluent.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, you win! But only because English isn’t my first language!
Mr. Postscript: If it makes you feel better.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: (laughing emoji)

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 12, 2021 2:45 P.M.
Subject: RE: Progress Update

We have different ideas of what is “not that much progress”. I am very much impressed with how the sweater is coming along. I’m also pleased with the fabrics chosen for the jacket, not that I ever doubted you.
- Damian

Postscript: Do you take enjoyment from being so very vague?

Mr. Postscript: So what is your preferred movie to watch?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You mean what’s my favorite movie?
Mr. Postscript: Same difference.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Of course.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well it's the 1963 version of Cleopatra.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: That’s not what I was expecting. Why?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: It’s kinda nerdy but I just love the fashion aspect of it. Elizabeth Taylor has 65 costume changes in it!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Don’t get me wrong. The story itself is pretty awful, she herself said that, so I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone who isn’t big on fashion but I find it really inspiring personally.
Mr. Postscript: That makes sense. I don’t know if I’d appreciate it as much myself since fashion isn’t exactly my passion but sixty-five costume changes in one movie is impressive by any means.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 12, 2021 8:59 P.M.
Subject: This Is No Longer About The Progress Update Really

Glad to hear it.
- Marinette

P.S. That depends. Did you find my vague response frustrating?

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So what’s your favorite movie Dami?
Mr. Postscript: I’ve never seen the appeal to be frank.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That’s kinda sad. You’re really missing out.
Mr. Postscript: I highly doubt that. All the films I’ve seen either have awful dialogue or stupid characters who posess no common sense.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well then you clearly haven’t seen the right ones!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: We must rectify this immediately! I'll make you a list or something.
Mr. Postscript: If you wish to you may but I’m afraid it will have to wait. There’s been another breakout at Arkham Asylum and I have to call my father to check in.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay. Be safe!

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 12, 2021 7:00 P.M.
Subject: Obviously

Postscript: Yes.
- Damian

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 1:05 A.M.
Subject: RE: Obviously

P.S. Then yes. I do find it very much enjoyable.
- Marinette

Mr. Postscript: You should really go to bed sooner.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: who gave you the right
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Isnt it like five in the morning over there?
Mr. Postscript: I got a good night’s rest and went on an early morning run. Clearly, I’m not the problem here.
Mr. Postscript: You need to prioritize your sleep more, Marinette.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, Damian.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Greater men than you have tried to win that argument to no success.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Who are these greater men?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: okay that came out wrong.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I meant my papa
Mr. Postscript: Ah, I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I can’t be held responsible for anything I said before noon on a Saturday.
Mr. Postscript: It’s 11:30 in Paris.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That’s technically still before noon and we both know I had a late night.
Mr. Postscript: So you admit we wouldn’t be having this issue if you had gone to bed at a more reasonable time.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I admit nothing!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Besides if you were really concerned you would’ve replied faster.
Mr. Postscript: Well in my defense, I wasn’t exactly expecting you to be awake at one o’clock in the morning.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You underestimate me?
Mr. Postscript: I’m concerned for you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Aw. That’s cute!
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I am not cute.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Haha I never said you were.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I said your concern for me is cute.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Because it is.
Mr. Postscript: Yes, well someone has to keep you from turning into a sleep-deprived zombie like Drake.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You can try.
Mr. Postscript: Then I will.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Does this mean we’re going to finally stop switching back and forth between texts and emails?
Mr. Postscript: Why? Are you unable to keep up?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, I can keep up just fine. It just seems like you got a little confused there. You know, because you replied to my email with a text.
Mr. Postscript: Excuse me for being concerned.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well… since you seemed so distraught over my health and wellbeing, I suppose I can excuse it this one time.
Mr. Postscript: How generous of you.
Mr. Postscript: Can we talk more later?
Mr. Postscript: I wish I could talk longer but I need to go down to breakfast.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That’s okay! I should probably eat something too.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait a minute.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Please don’t tell me your whole family is up before six in the morning.
Mr. Postscript: No but our butler always is.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, good. Well you best not keep him waiting.
Mr. Postscript: No one keeps Alfred waiting.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 10:15 A.M.
Subject: There, I’ve Replied With An Email

Now don’t expect me to show concern for your health again. I see you are committed to your self destruction.
Damian

Postscript: You’d do the same for me.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 5:25 P.M.
Subject: RE: There, I’ve Replied With An Email

I appreciate the concern and I’ll try my best but I make no promises.
- Marinette

P.S. Yeah… Okay.

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m bored. What are you up to?
Mr. Postscript: Since I’ve given up trying to make you see reason, I’ll refrain from commenting on what time it is in Paris.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m glad to see you refraining. So, what are you up to?
Mr. Postscript: We’re getting ready to start “Movie Night” soon which reminds me…
Mr. Postscript: Since you’ve decided to introduce me to films that are actually worth my time, I don’t suppose you’d have some recommendations I can present for when my family inevitably realizes the choice should never be left to Grayson.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: See, now you’re going to appreciate what I can get done when you think I should be sleeping.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Give me a second.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, check your email. I sent you a very important document.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 11:45 P.M.
Subject: Marinette’s Must-Watch Movies List - Invitation to comment (1 Attachment)

[email protected] has invited you to comment on the following document.
(Document Attached)

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 5:50 P.M.
Subject: RE: Marinette’s Must-Watch Movies List - Invitation to comment

You invited me to comment?
- Damian

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 11:55 P.M.
Subject: RE: Marinette’s Must-Watch Movies List - Invitation to comment

Well, I didn’t want to give you editing privileges but I thought you’d be offended if I didn’t at least let you comment.

- Marinette

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 5:59 P.M.
Subject: RE: Marinette’s Must-Watch Movies List - Invitation to comment

Fair enough. I appreciate all the effort you put into this. Thank you.
- Damian

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 12:01 P.M.
Subject: RE: Marinette’s Must-Watch Movies List - Invitation to comment

It was really no problem! I actually had fun putting it together.
- Marinette

Mr. Postscript: Help me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Dami its two int he morning
Mr. Postscript: It’s an emergency.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: ???
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: what
Mr. Postscript: The verdict is in, tortuous. This movie is tortuous.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: are you talking about lilo and stitch?
Mr. Postscript: This is not the time for stupid questions.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What’s wrong?
Mr. Postscript: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Is it your family? Did they do something?
Mr. Postscript: No, it’s all this stupid movie’s fault.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: ?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I don’t understand
Mr. Postscript: He gets to stay!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Um, who?
Mr. Postscript: No. Never mind that.
Mr. Postscript: I need you to distract me from this damn movie.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, you mean Stitch! Yeah he gets to stay in the end right?
Mr. Postscript: Talk about anything else! Please!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What’s the problem?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m so confused…
Mr. Postscript: I might be having a bit of an overreaction to the story and require immediate distraction.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian, are you crying?
Mr. Postscript: No!
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I am simply, slightly, irrationally emotional.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey, it’s okay! I cried the first time I watched it too!
Mr. Postscript: What were you, six?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes but that’s not the point.
Mr. Postscript: You’re right. The point is you’re supposed to be distracting me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m trying my best but its two in the morning.
Mr. Postscript: Never mind. The credits are rolling now.
Mr. Postscript: Also, Grayson’s a blubbering mess which makes me feel better in comparison.
Mr. Postscript: Oh no he’s coming to hug me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You see, it isn’t only you! It’s just one of those movies that gets to everyone.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So is everything okay now?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Dami?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: you there?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: can I go back to sleep now?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: hello??
Mr. Postscript: Yes, hello. I’ve managed to escape Grayson’s octopus arms. Thank you for the assistance. I’ll leave you to your rest.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: okay… You good?
Mr. Postscript: Yes, I’m well again. Good night.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: yeah sure you too.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 14, 2021 2:31 A.M.
Subject: a little hypocritical, dont you think?

For you to lecture me on not getting enough sleep and then wake me up less than a day later at two in the morning?
- Marinette

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 8:36 P.M.
Subject: I Disagree

It was an emergency and therefore I encourage you to drop this matter and return to sleep at once.
- Damian

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 14, 2021 2:39 A.M.
Subject: Okay

g'night.
- marinette
From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 13, 2021 8:43 P.M.
Subject: RE: Okay

Goodnight, angel. Thank you for earlier.
- Damian

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 14, 2021 2:46 A.M.
Subject: RE: Okay

no problem dami. talk to you in the morning.
- Mari

Bonus:

From the phone of Jason Todd:

Chat Name: The Boys (Sans Damian)
Me: nice going dick you made the kid cry!
big bird: Hey! We had a touching moment!
timbo: You also werent very subtle that movie pick. Hes going to know something’s up.
big bird: You’ve been spending too much time with Bruce!
timbo: yeah? well youre just like bruce when it comes to treating him like hes a child.
Me: and an idiot
big bird: Well I never!
big bird: Just because you’ve all decided to finally hop on the older brother train doesn’t mean you get to rob me of my conductor’s hat! I thought you guys would appreciate that he showed some vulnerability tonight! He shouldn’t feel like he has to be strong around us all the time.
Me: we get that but he has a right to have boundaries he looked uncomfortable crying in front of us
timbo: It just seems like youre being too forceful with all this. Its not all going to be solved in a day.
Me: not to mention were going off of messages we werent even supposed to see
big bird: I know that!
big bird: I’m just trying to start somewhere.
timbo: Okay glad we’re all on the same page then.
Me: so whats next

Chapter Text

From the phone of Marinette Dupain-Cheng:

Chat Name: Maman
Maman: Marinette your supplies are here
Me: thanks! i’ll be down in a second!
Maman: Are you sure about this? It seems like an awful lot of work to go through for just one sweater…
Me: just wait till it’s done maman! its going to be my best work yet!
Maman: Okay sweetie, just be careful and try not to make a huge mess, yes?
Me: i will, promise!

Chat Name: Mr. Postscript

Mr. Postscript: Hello.
Me: Hey Dami! How’s it going?
Mr. Postscript: I am well, angel. Thank you.
Mr. Postscript: I know you’re likely very busy at the moment so I’ll make this quick. I only wanted to thank you for your assistance last night and apologize for my outburst and for waking you up at such an unreasonable time. I assure you it will not happen again.
Me: …
Me: Dami, its totally fine! I’m your friend, its no trouble! I’m happy I’m the person you thought to text. I went right back to sleep anyway!
Mr. Postscript: It was still unreasonable and selfish and I hope you will accept my apology and assurance that it will not happen again.
Me: …
Me: No, I do not accept that.
Mr. Postscript: …
Me: Because there’s nothing to forgive!
Me: look, I know we haven’t been friends for that long but my idea of friendship, sometimes it seems a little selfish. Sometimes I’m going to need you more than you need me at that particular moment and vice versa but it’s an equal exchange. I mean you wouldn’t turn me down if it was late and I was having a bad night and needed to talk. Right?
Mr. Postscript: Of course not.
Me: See! So you help me when I need it and I help you when you need it, that’s the deal. And I don’t know about you but I really don’t feel like having to swap apologies every time that happens. Do you?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: No. I see your point.
Me: So we’re good?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. We’re good.
Mr. Postscript: I only hope you never think I take your friendship for granted.
Me: I hope you know the same goes for me.
Mr. Postscript: While I trust your word, I am once again all too aware of the fact that you could do much better.
Me: Haha. Well, you sell yourself short and I won’t have any of it. I’m lucky to have you and you’re lucky to have me and let’s leave it at that. Okay?
Mr. Postscript: Very well.
Me: So what’re you up to today?
Mr. Postscript: My siblings and I are going out for ice cream in a moment. I believe Grayson called it a “Sundae Funday.” You know between last night’s antics and now this sudden need for ice cream, I can’t help but wonder if he’s going through yet another break-up.
Me: Wouldn’t you know if that were the case? Like wouldn’t he mention it or something?
Mr. Postscript: Angel, I have neither the desire nor the mental capacity to keep up with Grayson’s relationship drama. I stopped trying years ago, if I ever did that is.
Mr. Postscript: Regardless, if getting ice cream is how he feels like spending the day then I will support him.
Me: What a good brother you are.
Me: But wait a minute, aren’t you vegan?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. You remembered.
Mr. Postscript: I normally order gelato or sorbet. Most of my family members like regular ice cream but they always pick a place with a vegan option.
Me: Well, that’s great that they support you.
Mr. Postscript: Indeed.
Mr. Postscript: What about you? What are you doing?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Did I interrupt anything? If there’s anything you need to work on, we can message at a later time.
Me: Oh, it’s fine! Weekends are usually a little less busy and I’m actually fairly ahead of schedule at the moment.
Me: I was just testing out some different techniques I might use for Drake’s sweater but don’t even bother asking for more details because I’m not going to give you any!
Mr. Postscript: Alright, although it goes without saying I am quite curious about your idea.
Me: Sorry but you’re just going to have to wait to find out.
Mr. Postscript: Very well.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Grayson says we’re leaving now. I don’t wish to tempt another phone theft so I won’t be able to message for a while.
Me: That’s okay! Have fun!

Chat Name: The Child Prodigies (If you don’t look closely)
Me: helppp!!!!!
Luka: Ten euros says this is about Damian
Gami: Twenty on him doing something that makes her like him even more.
Luka: Hmmmmm…
Luka: No bet. That’s totally what it is.
Me: I hate you all.
Gami: Except for Damian, right?
Luka: Yeah, you loooove him.
Me: I do not!
Me: We’ve never even met!
Luka: Riiight, you’d never like someone you barely knew…
Gami: You like to wait till the first meeting to fall for them.
Me: …
Me: Well not anymore!
Me: Past mistakes aside, Ive grown since then!
Gami: You have, Nettie. We know that.
Luka: And we’re so proud of you, melody.
Luka: But there’s nothing wrong with liking someone and from the way you talk about him, Damian seems to be far from a stranger to you.
Kagami: Speaking of, what did he do this time?
Me: Gahhhhhh you had to remind me
Me: So he watched Lilo and Stitch last night and you know how that ending gets to everyone and then he texted me to comfort him or as he put it, distract him which was downright adorable! I mean come on!
Luka: You never stood a chance.
Me: Right?!
Me: Then he texts me this morning to apologize for waking me up so late and says he doesn’t want to take me for granted.
Gami: Noble of him.
Me: It's just every time I think I’ve got him figured out, he does something else to throw me off balance.
Me: You know at first he was just this cold entitled douche and now I know that he likes animals and cares a lot about his family and now I think he also might care about me too maybe and I dont know what to do with that information!
Me: I mean who can resist someone who cries during Lilo and Stitch?
Gami: (raised hand emoji)
Luka: (shrugging emoji)
Me: Who gave him the right to be that endearing?
Me: aknfkdsjhsknflnf help
Luka: Well…
Luka: You've got it bad.
Me: See!
Me: So now that were all on the same page, would you please drop the teasing for a second and just help me?
Luka: …
Luka: What do you need Marinette?
Gami: Yes. I’m aware I’m not the most emotionally attuned person but I’m also having trouble understanding what the problem is.
Me: …
Me: I just
Me: I don't want to do this again
Me: I mean I let my feelings for Adrien blind me to how his choices were hurting me and now I can’t even talk to him without feeling betrayed all the time.
Me: I might like Damian but I have too much going on to lose myself in another person again
Gami: You won’t. We wouldn’t let you.
Luka: Besides you’re not in the same place you were with Adrien, Marinette.
Luka: I mean, look Damian already knows you’re MDC, Frances’ favorite fashion designer…
Gami: M. Agreste would like to extend his apologies that he could not come to receive his second place trophy in person.
Luka: And he seems to respect what that entails, right?
Luka: Plus you live across an ocean from each other whereas with Adrien you saw him almost every day.
Luka: I’m just saying, it would be pretty hard for someone thousands of miles away to take over your life.
Gami: It would also be very hard for you to steal a phone over that distance.
Me: …
Me: Did you have to bring that up?!!!
Luka: Yeahhh not your finest moment melody...
Gami: The point I’m trying to make is that you would never do that now.
Gami: You said it yourself Marinette. You’ve grown since then. Don’t do yourself the disservice of believing you haven’t learned anything.
Luka: You know it goes without saying we’ll support you no matter what.
Gami: Except when it comes to phone theft.
Luka: (cause then we’d be enabling you)
Me: *facepalm*
Luka: All we’re saying is give yourself, and him a chance. Don’t shut out any of the possibilities.
Gami: Your past should have no claim on your future. Don’t let it take anything more from you, Mari.
Luka: Okay?
Me: …
Me: okaaay…
Me: …
Me: Where would I be without you two?
Luka: Easy.
Luka: In jail for Grand Theft Mobile.

From the phone of Adrien Agreste:

Chat Name: Ms. Bustier’s Class
Rose: Oh lila! how’s your hand doing?
Nino: yeah u ok?
Lila: Aw, you both are just the sweetest for asking! I feel so much better now! I just feel so bad for ruining Marinette’s jacket! She seemed so upset with me the other day…
Lila: I just wish I could control my muscle spasms!
Alya: Don’t worry, girl! She’ll come around and forgive you!
Kim: its not like she cant just make a new one
Adrien: I don’t know about that. Handmade clothes aren’t easy to replace. Marinette probably put a lot of time into it. My father would be really upset if something happened to one of his designs.
Lila: …
Lila: Oh! I know!
Lila: Why don’t I just ask Mr. Agreste to replace it? We’ve gotten so close since I’ve started modeling for Gabriel! I’m sure he wouldn’t mind me calling in a favor. After all, I’ve helped him out a bunch of times.
Kim: !!!!
Nino: dude that would be awesome! marinette idolizes him!
Mylené: yeah that’s so nice of you lila!
Lila: Say, did I ever tell you guys about the time I saved his entire spring collection from water damage after a pipe broke in the storage room?

Chat Name: Marinette
Me: Hey Marinette! I really liked your presentation in class today! I’m sorry Lila interrupted but everyone was still really impressed!
Marinette: Message not received.
Me: Hi. How are you doing?
Marinette: Message not received.
Me: Hey remember when we talked about you coming to one of my photoshoots? I have one Saturday afternoon if you want to come?
Marinette: Message not received.
Me: I’m really sorry about your jacket. Do you need help replacing it?
Marinette: Message not received.
Me: Hey, are you able to make it to the photoshoot today? Lila won’t be there this time. We could come pick you up.
Marinette: Message not received.

Chat Name: Kagami
Me: Hi Kagami! How are you?
Me: I heard you won your match the other day. Congrats! I missed you at fencing this week but I bet you enjoyed travelling again.
Kagami: Thank you, Adrien. I was satisfied with my performance and pleased with the resulting victory. I did enjoy my brief return to Japan although I missed my friends as well as the reprieve they give me from my mother’s comments.
Me: I’m sure. Speaking of friends, you’re close with Marinette right? I was just wondering if you’ve heard from her lately.
Kagami: Marinette is my friend, yes. We talk. Why do you ask?
Me: It’s just we made plans to go to one of my photoshoots together and I haven’t been able to reach her to confirm. Do you know if she changed her number?
Kagami: Aren’t you two in the same class? Couldn’t you talk to her then?
Me: Well, yes it’s just we’re both so busy these days, we hardly ever have time to talk. My father’s really increased my involvement with the company. He even has me training the newer models now.
Kagami: Right. I saw your new advertisement with Lila Rossi the other day.
Kagami: …
Kagami: I’m afraid I can’t help you, Adrien. To my knowledge I’m not aware of Marinette switching numbers although, I suppose with how busy I’ve been with all the traveling I’ve been doing lately I could’ve missed it. I highly doubt that’s the case however seeing as we talked just this morning. I do hope you eventually get through to each other but right now I have to leave for my afternoon practice. It doesn’t do to keep people waiting. Good luck, Adrien.
Me: Oh, okay. Thanks Kagami.
Me: Good luck with your practice.

Google Search History
Ladybug
Ladyblog
Instagram
Adrien Agreste
Why aren’t my messages being received?
Why would someone block you?
How to be a good friend
Lila Rossi

From the phone of Kagami Tsurugi:

Chat Name: Music Tutor
Music Tutor: I was not expecting her to admit it so soon.
Me: Neither did I but Marinette’s always worn her heart on her sleeve. You know that.
Music Tutor: The only problem is that has yet to end well for her.
Me: …
Me: What about with you?
Music Tutor: That ended before it even began but we’re good friends now so I guess we both ended up where we needed to be.
Me: What do you mean by that?
Music Tutor: I mean…
Music Tutor: I think what we both needed when we met was just a really good friend, someone who didn’t judge and well that’s where we are now.
Me: I see.
Music Tutor: I mean isn’t that how it was with you two as well?
Me: I suppose, once we got over our initial assumptions.
Music Tutor: …
Music Tutor: I hope she takes our advice. I hope she gives him a chance to let him be what he could be for her.
Me: I do as well but doesn’t it still seem fast?
Me: I mean she does have a point: they haven’t even met yet.
Music Tutor: I don’t know
Music Tutor: Something about this feels right.
Me: I feel the same but I can’t explain why.
Music Tutor: …
Music Tutor: Maybe it’s because Damian was exactly what Marinette was needing too.
Music Tutor: I mean we’ve both seen how much she’s changed in the last year or so. How hard it is for her to trust people now, for good reason mind you.
Music Tutor: I just think it’s convenient that now is the perfect time for her to find some actually worthy of the faith she puts in them and in walks Damian.
Me: I see what you’re saying.
Me: But what if he’s not worthy of her?
Music Tutor: Well…
Music Tutor: Then I guess it's good that Marinette has at least one weapon-wielding friend, isn’t it?
Me: Yes, it is.
Me: …
Me: I just want her to be happy. After everything, she deserves it.
Music Tutor: …
Music Tutor: I know. She does.
Music Tutor: And so do you

Chat Name: Marinette
Marinette: So what do I do now?
Me: I’m not sure what you are referring to.
Marinette: With Damian…
Marinette: What do I do now that I know that I like him?
Me: I still don’t understand.
Me: Why would you have to do anything?
Marinette: I don’t know.
Marinette: Don’t I have to confess or something?
Me: Of course you don’t have to.
Marinette: But aren’t you the one who doesn’t believe in hesitating?
Me: …
Me: I don’t believe I like where that mindset got me.
Me: I’m beginning to think that sometimes hesitation is necessary in order to prepare yourself.
Me: There’s nothing wrong with waiting till you’re ready.
Marinette: Alya, she was always coming up with plans for how I could confess to Adrien. She didn’t think I should waste any time.
Me: Alya should’ve allowed you to deal with your feelings on your own terms.
Me: Only you’ll know where you’re ready, Mari. It’s fine if you’re not now.
Marinette: …
Marinette: I’m not.
Me: That’s fine.
Me: You will be someday and I think someone worth waiting for would wait for you too.
Marinette: Thanks Kagami.
Marinette: You’re a really good friend.
Me: Yes, well I learned from the best. (smiley face emoji)

Chapter Text

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey Damian are you doing anything right now? I wanted to get your opinion on something but I couldn’t remember if you were still in school at this time…
Mr. Postscript: Normally, I would be but rehearsals started today. I’m only now waiting for Alfred to take me home so I have time to text.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, rehearsals for what?
Mr. Postscript: My school’s winter showcase. I’m performing a piece on my violin.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait, what? That’s so cool!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So let me get this straight, you can sword fight and play the violin?
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wow.
Mr. Postscript: I’m also fluent in several languages.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
Mr. Postscript: Which, for your information, includes French so we could always switch to that if you’d prefer it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: (in French) Please tell me you’re joking.
Mr. Postscript: (in French) I never joke, Marinette.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: (in Mandarin) Kwami, help me.
Mr. Postscript: (in Mandarin) What’s wrong? I'm fluent in Mandarin as well but I can’t say I’m familiar with the term “Kwami”.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Sorry, ignore that last bit. I didn’t mean to send it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: WAIT WHAT?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Why on earth would you learn Mandarin?! It’s so hard to pick up! I’m barely able to manage a simple conversation in it.
Mr. Postscript: One of my grandmothers was Chinese, angel and my mother also went to great lengths to ensure I had an extensive education.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That’s cool.
Mr. Postscript: Of course, I’d always be willing to help tutor you if you wish. It is indeed a complex language.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Thanks Damian! I might take you up on that sometime. I’ve been learning from my maman but she’s really busy with the bakery and I have my work now too so it’s hard to find enough time for it these days.
Mr. Postscript: Well, I’m always at your disposal.
Mr. Postscript: Although, I am curious as to why you weren’t raised speaking it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I don’t know I guess it just wasn’t necessary. I think I asked her once and she said she and papa didn’t want to confuse me. You know cause I already had english and french to learn.
Mr. Postscript: Ah. I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wow, it really is impressive you can do all of that. Now I feel a little unaccomplished.
Mr. Postscript: Well, I can’t see why you’d think that.
Mr. Postscript: Remind me, who between the two of us is a world famous fashion designer? I can’t say I recall it being me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay now that’d be something. You don’t have any secret sewing skills do you?
Mr. Postscript: Not quite, no. I’m only able to manage just a basic stitch and it’s only for emergencies. To even compare it to your talents would be an offense.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Still, I’m pretty sure that’s more than most people can say.
Mr. Postscript: That’s exactly my point: You are not most people.
Mr. Postscript: You’re amazing, Marinette.
Mr. Postscript: At what you do I mean.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Which isn’t to say you’re not amazing in general as well.
Mr. Postscript: As you are.
Mr. Postscript: Amazing that is.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Thanks Damian. I think you’re pretty amazing too.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And if I didn’t before I definitely think my friends are going to love you now.
Mr. Postscript: Oh?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I was under the impression they were already pleased with my company.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh believe me they are!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I just meant that you all have a lot more in common than I originally thought.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I mean you fit right in! There’s the swordplay stuff and Luka’s a musician too actually.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait, now don’t tell me you speak Japanese too?
Mr. Postscript: I know enough to get by but I’m not fluent I’m afraid.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Fluency is overrated as far as I’m concerned with Asian languages.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I suppose I can see why you’d say that.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I apologize. I believe I have to go now.
Mr. Postscript: I thought I’d have time to continue this conversation on the way home but I believe something’s come up that needs my attention.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Are you okay? What’s wrong?
Mr. Postscript: I’m not sure yet but my father’s come to pick me up and he only does that if there’s an emergency. I’ll contact you later when I’m free.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh okay! Be safe!

…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So, um is everything alright?
Mr. Postscript: Oh, yes.
Mr. Postscript: I apologize for not updating you sooner.
Mr. Postscript: It seems as if I was a little hasty in my predictions. As it so happens, my father merely had the afternoon free and decided to drive me home himself.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, good! I’m glad.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So, are you free to talk now or actually we could just do this another time if you want to spend time with him. From what you’ve said it sounds like he doesn’t get a lot of time off.
Mr. Postscript: Now is perfectly fine. We had some time to pass together before he had to return to his work.
Mr. Postscript: We just finished a bout of sword fighting actually. My father is an expert swordsman himself.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, that’s cool! Did you win?
Mr. Postscript: No. My father far surpasses me in experience.
Mr. Postscript: It seems I have a few alterations to make to my technique. I’ll be sure to keep his notes in mind next time.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, I’ll always be rooting for you!
Mr. Postscript: Thank you, angel.
Mr. Postscript: So what did you need me for?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right. So, I had this idea for Jason’s jacket… T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know how it’s going to have “Carpe Diem” on the lapels? I was thinking it might be cool if the lettering was in your handwriting.
Mr. Postscript: I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I just thought it’d be more personal that way, you know? What do you think?
Mr. Postscript: I do like the idea. As far as my father’s judgement is concerned, I believe the more personal the better.
Mr. Postscript: So, what do you require of me?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Great! Basically I’d need you to write the words out in script, scan it, and email it to me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh and please please tell me you have good handwriting
Mr. Postscript: Of course I do.
Mr. Postscript: You can add excellent penmanship to the list of my many talents.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hmmm… I’ll be the judge of that.
Mr. Postscript: Very well. What size should the letters be?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’d say about 3cm should be good. There’s a slight chance I’ll need to scale down a little bit but that’s a lot easier to do than enlarging it.
Mr. Postscript: Alright. I’ll try to send it to you either today or tomorrow.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Sounds good!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I should probably finish my homework now.
Mr. Postscript: Then I won’t keep you.
Mr. Postscript: Although, I am here if you need anything else.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Thanks Damian!
Mr. Postscript: Au revoir.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Au revoir :)

…
Mr. Postscript: I emailed the lettering. I assure you I would’ve sent it earlier but my brother was hogging the printer last night and I didn’t want him to see it and ask questions.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh it’s no problem!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I actually have some free time at the moment so I might as well get started on the template.
Mr. Postscript: I see.
Mr. Postscript: So now will you admit my handwriting is more than satisfactory?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hmmm… let me see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I don’t know about “more than” but it’ll do.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I take it your judgement means you believe you could do better?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, since I’m doing the writing of the back of the jacket I suppose you’ll see for yourself my qualifications.
Mr. Postscript: Very well. However, I do wonder if the two different styles would contrast each other?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Not really.
Mr. Postscript: I mean, in a way?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: The reason I had you do the writing on the labels is because you picked out those words and they seem to be the more personal ones. Whereas, I’ll be stitching the back in a bolder cursive font to match the taunting phrase.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I don’t know if that makes sense, just trust me on this one.
Mr. Postscript: I suppose I can somewhat comprehend what you mean. I’m sure the finished product will make me regret ever questioning you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: It’s actually really cool that you notice things like that! You have an artist’s eye for details.
Mr. Postscript: I do like to sketch and paint myself, although I’m not quite certain how that translates to fashion.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh come on!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You have to be kidding me now! Your list of talents in growing longer by the conversation. What is this?
Mr. Postscript: I believe it’s what some people would call “getting to know you”. My list of talents hasn’t grown,only your knowledge of them has.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right, well.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I know something that’s definitely not on there.
Mr. Postscript: Oh, and what’s that?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Blackmailing.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Is that not a positive thing?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I don’t know…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Personally, I’d rather attempt it and succeed than try it and fail.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I mean, your morals are questionable either way but only one scenario justifies that fact.
Mr. Postscript: That’s a very valid argument, however I think I’ll choose the safest option of not attempting it all anymore.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I think that’s for the best.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I don’t know what I’d do if you stopped talking to me because you found yourself a new victim.
Mr. Postscript: I don’t think that particular situation is one you have to worry about, although I can’t help but wonder if someone else would actually let me live it down…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh keep dreaming! I let you off easy and you know it!
Mr. Postscript: I don’t know. I’m not quite familiar with blackmailing protocol. How am I to know the amount of time that has to pass before the other party stops bringing it up in every other conversation?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Easy! I believe the standard timeframe is, one second I’m checking, uh huh, oh yeah, never!
Mr. Postscript: Where is written down exactly? I’m afraid I didn’t receive all the proper materials beforehand.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You can find it on Wikipedia.
Mr. Postscript: Nevermind, I’ll just take your word for it then.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: One of these days I’m going to make you admit the usefulness of Wikipedia.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Unfortunately, I have some work I want to get done so it can’t be today.
Mr. Postscript: Right. I’ll leave you to it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: See you next time!
Mr. Postscript: Yes, next time.

…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: quick send me a bunch of texts right now!
Mr. Postscript: Why?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, Damian, sorry nevermind that wasn’t meant for you.
Mr. Postscript: Oh.
Mr. Postscript: My question still stands. Why do you need someone to send you texts so urgently?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh uh I need to look busy right now and its a lot easier to do if theres text alert sounds accompanying me.
Mr. Postscript: I
Mr. Postscript: see.
Mr. Postscript: That
Mr. Postscript: makes
Mr. Postscript: sense.
Mr. Postscript: Is
Mr. Postscript: it
Mr. Postscript: working?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know what, yes. It did work actually. Thanks for that.
Mr. Postscript: So now that I’m your accomplice in this, can I ask what situation required you to appear occupied?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: To be fair, I told you that message wasn’t meant for you. You really nominated yourself for the job there.
Mr. Postscript: Well, now I would like to know the job description. Who were you trying to avoid?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Remember that friend I was asking you for advice on?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Is he harassing you?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What? No! It’s not like that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I just really don’t feel like talking to him…
Mr. Postscript: I see.
Mr. Postscript: Wouldn’t a phone call be more effective?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: In theory, yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But Kagami’s normally the one I ask for help and if I called her while she was practicing, I could get her in trouble.
Mr. Postscript: I see. The texts worked though?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, and I think some of our classmates walked by so he lost his opportunity I guess.
Mr. Postscript: It doesn’t take much to change his mind I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Sorry for bothering you. Wait.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh no! Aren’t you in school right now?
Mr. Postscript: Don’t stress, I have a free period right now.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, still. I really shouldn’t have roped you into this. Eventually, I’m going to have to stop being a coward and just talk to him.
Mr. Postscript: I don’t think you’re being a coward.
Mr. Postscript: I think you’re trying to avoid being put in situations that would make you uncomfortable.
Mr. Postscript: I don’t see anything wrong with that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Still, he’s not a bad person, you know? Well, maybe you don’t know but I know that and I hope I haven’t made you believe he’s a bad person or anything because he isn’t.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Do I disagree with some of the things he said and done? Yeah. Did he unintentionally hurt me with his choices? Yeah. Is he a bad person? No.
Mr. Postscript: That may be true but neither does it make you a bad person for distancing yourself from him, especially since intentionally or not he’s caused you pain.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I don’t know. This whole situation is just messy.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I think I’m going to take a nap now. I stayed up late last night working and I need to catch up on my sleep.
Mr. Postscript: That sounds like a good plan but before you go, know that you can always message me for help if you need it. My phone is always on and I won’t ever get into trouble for using it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Thanks Damian.
Mr. Postscript: Sleep well, angel.

…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know I’ve been thinking…
Mr. Postscript: Oh?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I haven’t actually seen any proof that you can do all that you say you can. For all I know, you’re just trying to make yourself look good.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Are you calling me a liar, Marinette?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Nooooo…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m just saying that it is a lot of skills for one person to have, especially a teenager, and knowing your… high opinion of yourself, I hardly think it’s a leap to assume that perhaps what you conclude is a show of talent others would classify as a mere attempt…
Mr. Postscript: I see.
Mr. Postscript: So you’re calling me delusional.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Isn’t everything delusion without proof?
Mr. Postscript: No, in most cases it is simply theoretical.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well then I guess I’ll just consider you theoretically talented until I see some proof.
Mr. Postscript: What proof do you require? Did we not converse in two different languages the other day?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, that’s hardly proof of anything. I mean there’s always the possibility that you used Google Translate…
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I know you’re jesting now. Given my stance on Wikipedia, you must know I would ever consider using that abomination.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes, fine! I’m kidding!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: In all honesty, I’ve just been really curious since you mentioned you draw and I wanted to see some of your work.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh but if you don’t want to, that’s fine! I still believe you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I don’t think you're a liar or anything, and I’ve gotten pretty good at recognizing them.
Mr. Postscript: It’s not a problem. If it were you, I’d be curious too. Mr. Postscript: Let me find something to show you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yay!
Mr. Postscript: (Image File)
Mr. Postscript: This is a portrait I did of my dog, Titus a while ago.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wow.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: It’s so lifelike! He’s so majestic.
Mr. Postscript: Indeed.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, I stand corrected. You are a really good artist, Damian. This is amazing.
Mr. Postscript: I appreciate the praise, although it does help having a good subject to capture.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I can imagine!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You’ve been holding out on me! Why haven’t you told me about him sooner?
Mr. Postscript: It didn’t come up in conversation.
Mr. Postscript: Would it make it up to you if I emailed you more pictures? I also have a cat if you’d like to see him.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes please!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And tell Titus I love him!
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: The feeling isn’t mutual I’m afraid.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What?!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Why?
Mr. Postscript: There have been a few times when our conversations have taken priority over his entertainment, which he has not handled with the dignity affording his breeding.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian!!!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Go give him attention right now!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I can’t have him thinking I’m stealing you from him!
Mr. Postscript: I am not neglecting him by any means!
Mr. Postscript: I simply refuse to put down my tasks anytime he’s in the mood to play. A good dog needs to have some level of discipline.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian, go!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: now!!!
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I suppose it is a nice day for a game of fetch…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes, good!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And make sure he knows this was my idea!
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Very well. I’ll send you the pictures later then.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okie dokie
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Goodbye!
Mr. Postscript: Goodbye.

…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So, did Titus enjoy his exercise yesterday?
Mr. Postscript: Yes, indeed. He had a very good afternoon. Did you enjoy the pictures?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yesss!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: All your animals are beautiful!
Mr. Postscript: I’m most certainly biased but I’d have to agree with you on that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: By the way, what’s your cat’s name? You never told me.
Mr. Postscript: It’s Alfred The Cat.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, is he named after your butler then?
Mr. Postscript: He is. We call him Alfred The Cat so there’s no confusion.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That makes sense.
Mr. Postscript: Do you have any pets yourself, angel?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Um. No. I wish.
Mr. Postscript: I suppose it would be hard to keep animals near the bakery.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, it’s a bummer.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’ll just have to live vicariously through you.
Mr. Postscript: Very well. I’ll be sure to send you any good photos I happen to take.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Thanks Dami!
Mr. Postscript: I have to go down to breakfast now.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay. Cya later!

…
Mr. Postscript: I am looking through your movie recommendations list and I can’t help but notice that it seems to be in no particular order.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, sorry. It was the middle of the night, I was just writing down whatever came to mind.
Mr. Postscript: Do you have a recommendation for what to start with?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hmmm let me open it up and see. Are you having another family movie night?
Mr. Postscript: Not quite. My sister and I are trying to decide what to watch however neither of us possess much experience in the matter.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait, what?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You have a sister???
Mr. Postscript: Yes, although I understand your surprise as I don’t believe I've mentioned her yet.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You definitely haven’t! I thought it was just you and your brothers!
Mr. Postscript: It is unfortunate that I failed to mention my only decent sibling besides Grayson.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, I’m totally going to ask you more about her later but for now, what kind of movies does she like? I know you said neither of you have watched many but is there a certain genre you like?
Mr. Postscript: Let me ask.
Mr. Postscript: She says to tell you that she would like to watch something comedic and I will add my own wish for it to have some action in it. I’ve suffered through too many tasteless romance movies because of Grayson.
Mr. Postscript: Hes exaggerating it was only one actually, although it was pretty terrible. (This is Cass.)
Mr. Postscript: One was enough. This is Damian again.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Is Cass your sister?
Mr. Postscript: Yes, she’s following our conversation over my shoulder.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, well hi Cass! Thanks for clearing that up. I think I’m starting to see that Damian can be pretty over dramatic at times.
Mr. Postscript: That’s simply not true.
Mr. Postscript: It is. - C
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Haha. I like her, or you, I’m not sure who has the phone right now.
Mr. Postscript: I (Damian) do, and as much as I enjoy both of you insulting me at once, we only have a few hours before we have to go.
Mr. Postscript: To sleep that is. So do you have a recommendation for us?
Mr. Postscript: Also, Cass wants me to tell you she likes you too.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay! Got it. It’s perfect.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: The Princess Bride is a classic, but you two haven’t seen it yet right?
Mr. Postscript: No, we haven't.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: There is a little romance but it does have action in it by the way. I know that title doesn’t make it seem like that but it does! It’s also one of the funniest movies ever if you’re asking me.
Mr. Postscript: We’ll watch that then. Thank you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Cool. I think you’ll actually really like it.
Mr. Postscript: Very well. I will let you know my thoughts when it’s done.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh boy.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, I await your judgement then…

…
Mr. Postscript: Is calling your love interest demeaning names and having them do things for you this movie’s idea of romance?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, yes but just give it a chance and watch!
…
Mr. Postscript: That is what inconceivable means. He’s using it correctly. Inigo is wrong.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Really? Well, my childhood is a lie.
Mr. Postscript: Tt. Isn’t all of ours?
…
Mr. Postscript: I admit I did enjoy the dialogue of the duel, although I don’t believe real enemies would allow each other to carry a conversation throughout a fight.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I think it’s meant to illustrate their respect for each other.
Mr. Postscript: I’ll accept that interpretation.
…
Mr. Postscript: I am now firmly rooting for the man in black. He is the only capable character in this movie.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Fair enough.
…
Mr. Postscript: The identity reveal was quite predictable although I admit having multiple people adopt the same moniker does seem to be an effective way of creating an intimidating legend.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Totally!
…
Mr. Postscript: The six-fingered man has been found I see. It’s awfully convenient he just so happens to be connected to the prince.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian, it’s a movie. There has to be some plot convenience.
Mr. Postscript: If you say so.
…
Mr. Postscript: Cass thinks Buttercup is a terrible protagonist.
Mr. Postscript: Shes too naive - C
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Not to mention, useless in a fight. I agree. Do you like the rest of the movie though?
Mr. Postscript: Yes its very funny - C
Mr. Postscript: She wants me to put my phone down and watch it now.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay then you better do that
…
Mr. Postscript: That is the most ridiculous torture device I have ever seen.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: How many torture devices have you seen?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Fair point.
…
Mr. Postscript: I might be willing to forgive some so-called plot convenience, but are you really expecting me to simply accept the existence of a character named “Miracle Max” whose sole purpose in this story is to resurrect the hero?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: … Yes.
…
Mr. Postscript: This officiant’s voice alone ruins the whole movie.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Aw.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You sure it isn’t just that you’re a bit upset that you have yet to find your twue lahv?
Mr. Postscript: That is certainly not the case. The only thing I’m upset about is that his mediocre ceremony is interrupting the storming of the castle.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: If you say so.
…
Mr. Postscript: Which character is your favorite?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Probably, Westley. Why?
Mr. Postscript: I needed to gauge your taste before deciding if I’d continue taking your film suggestions.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, and did I pass?
Mr. Postscript: Well considering the only correct answer was Inigo and that was not your response, no. You did not.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Ah, but I thought you said Westley was the only capable character in the movie. I mean, he did defeat Inigo in the duel.
Mr. Postscript: That hardly means anything when you take into account that that duel was not the climax of Inigo’s character arc. Inigo manages to defeat his enemy in the end while Westley is currently unable to fight at all.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: He doesn’t need to! Just wait and see.
…
Mr. Postscript: I suppose Westley isn’t the worst second choice.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Mmhmm
…
Mr. Postscript: Cass liked the movie.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m glad.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And you?
Mr. Postscript: It was entertaining enough.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Do I take it that means you might consider letting me suggest another movie for you sometime?
Mr. Postscript: Perhaps.
Mr. Postscript: Is there any chance you might consider letting me suggest you go to bed soon?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I was hoping to stay around to get your full movie review but I suppose I am a bit sleepy.
Mr. Postscript: Then go to sleep now and tomorrow, I’ll give you my full thoughts.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: As you wish
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Goodnight, Damian.
Mr. Postscript: Goodnight, Marinette.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date:November 20, 2021 6:01 A.M.
Subject: Damian’s Recommended Film Reviews - Invitation to comment (1 Attachment)

[email protected] has invited you to comment on the following document.
(Document Attached)

Chapter Text

From the phone of Bruce Wayne:

Chat Name: Dick
Dick: So, how’d it go?
Me: Good. We know when the next shipment is due to arrive.
Dick: Not that! I meant how’d it go with Damian?
Me: Oh, it went well.
Dick: What’d you do?
Me: I helped him with his fencing technique. He mentioned wanting to refresh his skills.
Dick: …
Dick: Well, that’s great! But maybe next time you could do something that’s more fun and less violent?
Me: I’d hardly call fencing a violent activity.
Me: However, I’ll take that into account next time.
Dick: Great!
Dick: Remember, I’m coming on Saturday to take him to the zoo with Jason, Tim, and the girls. You sure you can’t come with us?
Me: I’m sure. I have a lot of work to do.
Dick: You always do and it’ll still be there when you’re done.
Me: We’ll see.

Chat Name: Alfred
Me: Alfred, why are Damian and Cass fencing and quoting The Princess Bride?
Alfred: I believe that is a result of last night’s movie selection.
Me: I see.
Me: Could you ask them to stop or take it somewhere else? I can’t concentrate while their voices are echoing.
Alfred: May I ask why you are unable to ask them yourself, Master Bruce?
Me: I don’t want to be the one to ruin their fun.
Alfred: In any case, while the gymnasium is being remodeled after Miss Mar’i’s last visit, there is nowhere else in the house to entertain them. You can either leave them be or ask them to stop yourself, as I will not do it for you.
Me: …
Me: Very well.
Alfred: Is that all, Master Bruce?
Me: Yes, Alfred.
Me: …
Me: You know, Damian isn’t a half-bad actor.
Alfred: Is that so?
Me: Does Gotham Academy have an acting program?
Alfred: I believe so. Perhaps you could suggest he join.
Me: I will.

Chat Name: Barbra Gordon
Barbra Gordon: Tim’s getting really close to spoiling the surprise. You know him, if he’s invested in something he’ll eventually figure it out.
Me: Can you hold him off till the day?
Barbra Gordon: If I was only trying to, of course. But not if there’s other things you need me to handle. So, no.
Me: I understand.
Me: Then keep the fashion designer a secret as long as possible. That’s a much bigger surprise. It’s harmless if he finds out about the French bakery.
Barbra Gordon: …
Barbra Gordon: Got it.

From the phone of Damian Wayne:

The Gotham Gazette
Bruce Wayne Donates $1 Million To Wikipedia Nov 20 2021
The multibillionaire saying when asked for a comment, “It’s only fair, I don’t know if my oldest sons would’ve passed half their classes without it”.

Chat Name: Father
Me: I see you made the donation. Thank you.
Father: Well, it is good press.
Father: Although I am surprised you asked.
Father: I wasn’t aware you were so passionate about free access to information.
Me: The cause has only recently come to my attention.
Father: Is that so?
Me: Yes.
Me: I must prepare for the zoo now, Father. Grayson did not give me nearly enough time in advance.
Father: Alright. Have fun. I’ll have Alfred give you some money for the gift shop.
Me: Thank you.

Chat Name: T.G.Y.T.T.B.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Do you have a girlfriend?
Me: What?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: SORRY!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That wasn’t meant for you.
Me: …
Me: Who was it meant for?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, it was meant for you but like I didn’t mean to send it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I mean I was going to but then I realized how personal that was and also like totally none of my business so yeah just ignore that…
Me: I would hardly consider asking if I was romantically attached to someone to be more personal than any of the other subjects we’ve discussed before.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh. yeah, I guess.
Me: I’m not.
Me: Romantically involved with anyone I mean.
Me: I would’ve simply stated that earlier. I was just surprised by the suddenness of the question.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, sorry.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I was just thinking about how I just assumed last night that you hadn’t met your “twue lahv” yet but I didn’t actually know if that was true.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So then yeah I got curious and by curious I mean nosey.
Me: I see.
Me: I’d have thought our previous conversations about my social skills would have confirmed your assumption for you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I wouldn’t say that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I think some girls (and boys too actually, I’ve completely given up on assuming anything) like the whole brooding, misunderstood loner type.
Me: There are a few things I’d like to address in that last message.
Me: 1. While I completely support the LGBTQ+ community (My older brother actually likes both men and women), I am heterosexual, although I agree it is best not to assume.
Me: 2. I do not brood.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Sureee…
Me: …
Me: 3. I will remind you what happened to the last girl who tried to make an advance. Suffice to say, my fellow classmates have given me a wide berth since then.
Me: …
Me: How about you?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh, I support the LGBTQ+ community too!
Me: While that’s reassuring, I meant to inquire about whether you were in a romantic relationship yourself.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh. No I’m not.
Me: Oh?
Me: After I met him, I wondered if you and Luka were more than friends.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, no.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I mean… we tried it once but I love him more like a brother than a boyfriend.
Me: I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So anyways what’re you up to?
Me: I’m leaving to go to the zoo in a moment with my siblings.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh yeah!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Speaking of siblings!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What the heck! How many have you been hiding from me?!
Me: I haven’t been hiding them. They simply haven’t come up in conversation.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: THEY?! How many siblings do you have?
Me: It depends on what you consider a sibling.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Ummm…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: How many (objectively) do you think you have?
Me: Currently? Three older brothers, one sister, two sister-adjacents, one possibly soon-to-be brother but we’ll see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, so I know the brothers. (Grayson, Todd, and Drake, right?) I’m assuming the sister is Cass then? But I have no idea what any of the rest means. What’s a sister-adjacent? I don’t understand.
Me: You’re right so far. Basically, my older brothers and Cass were all adopted so they are legally my siblings. However, there’s also Gordon and Brown to consider because while they are not legally tied to me in any way and also have blood relations of their own, they still objectively fill the roles of older sisters, hence the title sister-adjacent.
Me: You could consider them non-related cousins as well I suppose.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay, I’m with you so far.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I take it Gordon and Brown are their family names as well?
Me: Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So all that leaves is your possibly soon-to-be brother?
Me: Yes.
Me: This is simply speculation but whenever an orphan is in my father’s near vicinity it is typically only a matter of time before the adoption paperwork is filed. Although when he isn’t staying with us, Thomas still has some relatives left alive so it is possible he may be just another non-related cousin or perhaps a brother-adjacent.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okaaay. That’s not confusing at all.
Me: I assume this is sarcasm so I will direct you to blame all the confusion on my family. I am the only true blood son.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So, wait.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Your father just adopts children whenever he feels like it?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Just like that?
Me: Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
Me: I believe Grayson called it an instinct once.
Me: Or was it a coping mechanism.
Me: I’m not entirely certain.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okaaay
Me: Regardless, he assured me it could not be cured unfortunately.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait, so why don’t you want me to make gifts for your other siblings? Why just the brothers?
Me: Well my father only asked me to get my brother’s presents and besides them, only Cass and Brown spend the holiday with us. I always get the girls the same thing each year anyway and they’ve never complained about it.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh well that makes sense I guess. It’s cool that you have so many siblings. I always wanted some but it’s just me, myself, and I over here.
Me: I would give you some of mine but I would never wish to inflict that on you. Most people simply aren’t equipped to handle them.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Ha. I’m pretty sure that's what they’d say about you.
Me: …
Me: You’re probably right. However, I don’t need anyone to handle me. I manage just fine on my own.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Ah but you don’t have to, you know.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I mean, who knows how many terrible movies you’d endure if you didn’t have my excellent suggestions to guide you.
Me: I admit I enjoyed “The Princess Bride” more than I thought I would.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yay! :)
Me: While I’d like to continue this conversation, it’s almost time to leave.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay! Have fun at the zoo! Send me any pictures you take.
Me: I will.

From the phone of Tim Drake:

Instagram

DickGrayson
(Picture of Dick, Jason, Tim, Stephanie, Cass, and Damian in front of The Gotham Zoo’s welcome sign. Dick and Cass are smiling, Steph is holding up a peace sign and making a duck face, Jason has his arms crossed and his brows raised at the camera, Tim is squinting at the camera, Damian is glaring at the person behind the camera.)
37,000 Likes
DickGrayson Family field trip! :) (Wish @BabsGordon could’ve made it!)
1 hour ago
Comment
BabsGordon Yeah I heard I missed out on a lot of excitement

Chat Name: Con
Con: How’s the family bonding going?
Me: not great
Me: just got back from the zoo where all damian did was harass the zookeepers and tell them how to do their job.
Con: Oh. That’s not good.
Me: yeah. not my favorite way to spend a saturday but at least I finally found something on his french friend.
Me: seems like B finally gave up on keeping everything from me. don’t know why he even tried. I mean he already showed pretty much the entire family their messages. there’s no point hiding anything now.
Con: Damian still has no clue?
Me: yeah thank coffee. not looking forward to the day he finds out, jasons probably right about him going off the rails when that happens
Con: Off what rails? Will you need me to catch him?
Me: oh no its just another expression. basically he’ll react badly
Con: Oh. Shouldn’t he though? What your father did was wrong, right?
Me: …
Me: yeah I guess thats still not the right phrasing
Me: he’ll be upset, rightfully so
Con: So won’t you looking into his friend make it worse?
Me: I think the damage is done there kon. Im just doing what I can now to help
Con: I don’t understand.
Me: look, damians never had a normal friend before okay? he doesnt know that people arent always friends with people like us for the right reasons. yeah it sucks that now everybody in the family knows his personal thoughts but imagine if everyone in gotham knew, if she sold those messages to the press? Im not about to let that happen
Con: Does the information you’ve found about her make it seem like she’d do that?
Me: nothing points to that so far. her parents own a pretty successful bakery in paris. shes the class president at her school. on the surface she seems nice enough but besides jason none of us have talked to her and i'm not just going to take his word that shes not a threat based on one conversation.
Con: I don’t think you’re handling this in the right way.
Me: wait a minute.
Me: has damian said anything to jon about marinette? has he talked to her?
Con: Um I can ask. Give me a second.
Con: No, he didn’t even know Damian had another friend. Now he’s saying he wants to fly out to Paris to meet her.
Con: …
Con: Never mind, he’s already on his way.
Con: Mind sending him the address? They own a bakery right?
Me: yeah hang on one sec

Chat Name: Jon Kent
Me: (screenshot of Tom & Sabine Boulangerie Patisserie website with the address highlighted)
Me: you didnt get this information from me or else, got it?
Jon Kent: Got it! Thanks Tim!
Me: I’m serious. If Damian finds out it was me who sent you this, Bruce finds out about your guys’ late night adventures. Capiche?
Jon Kent: …
Jon Kent: You know about that?
Me: I wasn’t born yesterday and Damian’s window squeaks.
Me: Do we have an understanding?
Jon Kent: Yessir. Yup. Yes we do.
Me: Good.

Chat Name: Con
Me: hopefully jon finds something helpful
Con: Well, it takes a lot for Jon to not like someone so there’s a good chance he’ll approve.
Me: youre right his standards are too low he probably won't help at all
Con: I didn’t say that.
Me: anyway I need to get some work done, between the zoo this morning and the ruckus last night Im behind and Im never behind
Con: Yeah, why was Damian shouting “To The Pain” last night? Is everything okay? What does that even mean?
Me: …
Me: you up for movie night tonight?
Con: Sure. What’re we watching?
Me: a classic youll love it.
Con: Cool. 6 work for you?
Me: yep ill be on the roof
Con: See you then.
Me: k

From the phone of Damian Wayne:

Chat Name: T.G.Y.T.T.B.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey didn’t we talk just the other day about how weird it is that you know so much about me while I still know so little about you?
Me: We did talk about that. Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So explain this.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: (Picture of Jon eating a chocolate eclair.)
Me: …
Me: Give him the phone.

CALLING… T.G.Y.T.T.B.
Call Lasted 22 Seconds

Chat Name: T.G.Y.T.T.B.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What did you say to him? He looked like you just kicked his puppy.
Me: I would never kick a puppy!
Me: Not to mention his dog could kick back.
Me: Anyway, pardon the interruption to your afternoon. Jon will be on his way now.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait but why was he here in the first place? Where did he come from?
Me: …
Me: He was on a school field trip.
Me: So you see, he has to get back to his class now.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh… okay.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, can you tell him enjoyed meeting him?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh and that I’m glad he liked the pastries.
Me: Yes. I will do that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay great! :)

Chat Name: Jon
Me: Say your last words, Kent. You are dead.
Jon: Damian! I said I was sorry.
Me: How did you even find out about her? Who told you?
Jon: Um, I’m sorry I just can’t believe you made another friend and didn’t tell me! Some best friend you are!
Me: Oh no.
Me: You are not distracting me now. How did you find out? Who else knows?
Jon: Damian please I can’t tell you, I’m sorry.
Me: It seems our friendship has made you forget to fear me.
Me: I’m going to figure it out Jon. You know I will.
Jon: Damian, please.
Jon: I was just hurt you didn’t tell me about her.
Jon: I mean it’s bad enough that you replaced me but then you didn’t even tell me about it!
Me: Who said I replaced you?!
Me: I didn’t know I wasn’t allowed to simply become friends with another being on this planet. If you actually knew anything about my friendship with Marinette, you might’ve known I’ve never called her my best friend. That title has always belonged to you. Although if we were measuring with loyalty right now, I’d say you didn’t deserve it.
Me: So I am going to ask you one more time Jon. Who told you about Marinette?
Jon: …
Jon: Please Damian. I’m sorry. I messed up. It won’t happen again. I’ll do anything you ask of me but I just can’t tell you.

Chat Name: Alfred
Me: Alfred, I am angry.
Alfred: I see. Why is that, Master Damian?
Me: I have been betrayed.
Alfred: Oh dear. By who?
Me: I’m not sure yet. Jon and someone else. However, it is mainly Jon I am angry with right now.
Alfred: I see. And what would you like me to do for you?
Me: I would like you to tell me what I should do.
Alfred: What do you want to do, Master Damian?
Me: What I want to do when I am angry never seems to be what I should do.
Alfred: Alright. Well, how about this. When someone is angry at you, what would you want them to do?
Me: …
Me: I suppose I’d want them to understand, to understand my reasons for my actions.
Alfred: Very well. Do you understand Mister Kent’s perspective? Perhaps if you tried really hard to.
Me: … I suppose.
Alfred: Then after you’ve reached an understanding, what would you want someone who is angry at you to do next?
Me: Well then I’d want them to forgive me.
Alfred: Naturally so, Master Damian. So, do you want to forgive Mr. Kent?
Me: Well, of course I do! He’s my best friend! Do you really think I’d want to lose one of my only friends?
Me: But your comparison doesn’t work Alfred! Because when I make a mistake, I do whatever I can to fix it. Jon won’t even tell me who’s giving him information they shouldn’t even possess.
Alfred: Yes, then that is different. But Master Damian, when you make a mistake, are you always able to put things back exactly as they were before? Are you always able to restore what you’ve broken?
Me: …
Me: No.
Me: But at least I always try to.
Alfred: Yes, but the result isn’t perhaps always what the person you have offended would wish it to be, correct?
Me: …
Me: Yes.
Alfred: I believe you can see where I am going with this, Master Damian.
Me: I can.
Alfred: The decision of whether or not to forgive him is yours, Master Damian but I believe it would help you to ask yourself if you truly believe Mister Kent had only bad intentions. Even then, there isn't only two options. You do not have to choose between forgiveness or losing his friendship. You may wish to simply move forward despite the transgressions that have conspired.
Me: …
Me: Thank you, Alfred.
Alfred: Any time, Master Damian.

Chat Name: Jon
Me: Anything else?
Jon: YES! I promise!
Me: We’ll need your father’s assistance.
Jon: Um Damian, I already told you. Dad said he couldn’t find any alien species that look like Stitch, and definitely not any that’d be up for adoption. I can’t help what ain’t possible.
Me: Not that. We need him for something else.
Jon: Okaaay…

Chat Name: Father
Me: Father, do I have permission to spend the night at the Kent’s?
Father: I think Dick wanted to spend time with you, Damian.
Me: I already had to endure that terrible place for his sake today and Jon and I have a project to work on.
Father: Then that’s fine, but I thought you liked the zoo?
Me: It must have come under new management since the last time we went, Father. I don’t recall it being so unkept.
Father: Alright then.

Chat Name: Grayson
Grayson: Hey Dami I know how passionate you are about animals but maybe next time, you could be a little nicer to the zoo employees. They really do know what they’re doing and are just trying to do their job. Okay?
Me: Those idiots wouldn’t know the proper diet of a mountain lion if it included neglectful zookeepers.
Grayson: …
Grayson: We’ll come back to that. What’re you up to?
Grayson: Do you want to do anything else while I’m here?
Me: I’m hanging out with Jon. I won’t be home tonight.
Grayson: …
Grayson: Oh okay. Have fun.

Chat Name: T.G.Y.T.T.B.
Me: Jon says thank you for the pastries and that he enjoyed meeting you too.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yay, I’m glad! Once I got over the surprise of it all, it was actually cool to meet another of your friends.
Me: I’m glad it went well. I also believe I owe you something so here’s a picture I drew based on a photograph I took at the zoo. (Sketch of a sloth in a tree)
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Awww it’s so cute! They’re called slugs in english, right? Wait, that doesn’t sound right…
Me: Close. It’s a sloth. Slugs are limaces.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Ah, got it. Thanks. I can hold a conversation for the most part but the specific names for things are where I struggle.
Me: That makes sense. You are for the most part incredibly fluent. Where did you learn English so well? Surely not just at school.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yeah, school really only gave us enough to get by if that. Honestly, most of what I know just comes from reading so many English fashion magazines as a child and more recently following a lot of American or British fashion designers on social media. I’m told I definitely write it better than I speak it in any case.
Me: I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, I’m going to turn in early. I had a busy day working on the pieces for your brothers. I got a lot of work done.
Me: I hope you’re not overworking yourself.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Nah. When I’m truly in the zone, it doesn’t feel like work at all. It’s just something I love doing. It calms me even.
Me: Well, I’m glad to hear it.
Me: Goodnight, Marinette.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Night, Dami.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh! Before I forget, I know you said you already know what you’re getting her but let me know if you can think of anything I could make Cass that she might want, even if it’s something small like a bracelet or a hair tie. I really enjoyed meeting her yesterday. Okay?
Me: …
Me: I’ll let you know if I think of something.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Great! Goodnight!

Chat Name: Cain
Me: I figured it out.
Cain: ?
Me: You meet Marinette and then the next day someone informs Jon of her existence? Do you take me for a fool? I thought you of all people would not involve yourself in my personal business but it seems I will not be making that mistake again. You will have to find someone else to reenact scenes with you. I have high standards for my company and you no longer meet them.
Cain: Damian…
Me: Do not speak to me, traitor.

From the phone of Tim Drake:

Chat Name: idk ppl ig
Dick: Why didn’t anyone tell me Damian left???
Dick: The whole point of this weekend was spending time with him and now he’s gone!
Dick: :(
Jason: great going tim you made dick sad
Me: Im literally not even there how did I do anything
Dick: Wait what do you mean?! Where are you?
Me: Im hanging out with Conner
Dick: Are you kidding me?! Both my brothers left me for the Kent kids?!
Jason: maybe its because they dont force them to go to the goddamn zoo
Dick: Oh come on! How was I supposed to know Damian wouldn’t like it?! He loves animals!
Me: I dont know maybe do better research next time?
Dick: Hmpf
Dick: Well, I don’t see any of you contributing.
Babs: Which one of you imbeciles told Jon about Marinette?
Me: …
Dick: …
Jason: …
Dick: I definitely didn’t tell him!
Jason: finally something I didnt do
Me: What happened?
Babs: Look I don't care if ya’ll want to dig around in his file. I know a little bit about being nosey.
Babs: But someone messed up because now Damian thinks Cass did it since apparently she talked to Marinette last night and now he’s refusing to talk to her and Cass is upset.
Me: …
Dick: …
Jason: uh oh
Babs: Yeah no kidding
Babs: I don’t even care who really did it but Cass is not taking the blame for this so someone better step up. Figure it out boys.
Jason: hmmm, someone sticking their nose into other people’s business I wonder who it could be
Dick: Tim?
Me: in my defense, I did not think he would blame it on Cass
Jason: tim, not thinking? Im shocked
Dick: Well, you’re going to have to come clean. This isn’t fair to her.
Jason: yeah great going by the way. the one person in this family who actually has a good relationship with damian and you just come in and ruin it nice job buddy
Dick: Hey! I have a good relationship with Damian too!
Me: As much as Id love to be the one on damians bad side yet again, I cant be the one to come clean. what would I even tell him? oh yeah remember that girl Im not supposed to know about? yeah Im the one who told jon about her. how did I find out about her you ask? well you see B handed out copies of your messages to everyone in the family. so anyway glad that’s settled now.
Dick: …
Jason: …
Dick: Oh for god’s sake! You really did it this time Tim!
Jason: cass is going to kill you
Me: Well actually I do have another solution…
Dick: Okaaay?
Jason: ???
Me: So Damian thinks Cass did it because shes one of the few people who’ve talked to her but there is actually someone else who's met her…
Jason: no no no you are not getting away with this
Jason: I talked to spitfire because we all noticed him texting her and we all agreed I would steal his phone which in hindsight what very stupid of us and I took the blame then because I deserved to Im not taking taking it again now for something I had no part of
Me: Jason its the best way to keep him from finding out the truth youre the one who pointed out that he would handle it badly
Jason: BECAUSE EVERYONE MESSED UP!
Jason: HE WOULD HANDLE IT BADLY BECAUSE THE TRUTH IS EVERYONE BETRAYED HIS TRUST
Jason: And your solution to that is to lie as long as you can but Im getting out while I still can
Jason: I am done with this family and their righteous, holier than thou excuses for not following the basic rules of human decency
Jason: Hes going to find out someday and when that happens Im going to tell him the part I played in all this. Ill keep it secret for now but I am not adding any more lies to my list.
Jason: You f*cked up you fix it Im done

Google Search History
tim drake-wayne
how to disown your family
how to disown your family legally
how to make amends with someone
tom and sabine boulangerie patisserie
forbes 30 under 30
wayne enterprises
how much coffee have i had today
wait why would google know that
fffffffffffffffffffffff

Chat Name: Cass
Me: …
Me: I told jon.
Cass: …
Cass: I know.
Me: I dont think I can fix this
Me: Not without making things a lot worse first
Me: I’m sorry
Cass: I know.
Cass: …
Cass: I will forgive you, eventually.
Cass: But I don’t know if Damian will.
Cass: Which is why I will bear his anger until your relationship is strong enough that it might survive him learning the truth, but you don’t have forever Tim.
Cass: The truth always comes out.
Me: …
Me: Right. Okay.
Me: Thank you Cass.

…

Chat Name: idk ppl ig
Dick: So have you sorted everything out?
Me: cass and I have an agreement for now. its handled.
Dick: Okay?
Dick: Great.
Dick: I wish I could’ve seen Damian again before I left. I can’t believe he spent all of Sunday with the Kents!
Me: yeah he only came home this morning I saw him for like a second before he left for school
Babs: Um have you guys seen this?
Babs: (Link to the following article)

The Daily Planet
BREAKING NEWS: The Gotham Zoo Exposed For Smuggling Exotic Animals Nov 22 2021
It starts with a concerned citizen noticing its inhabitants being fed feed not in line with their species’ natural diets, pointing out signs of neglect, and ends with the discovery of a smuggling ring possibly tracing back to Oswald Copplepot’s time as the Mayor of Gotham City. Read about Superboy and Robin’s involvement in this weekend’s discovery below.

Chat Name: idk ppl ig
Me: …
Dick: …
Jason: …
Dick: Oh my god
Me: wat
Dick: He said
Dick: and we
Dick: and I told him
Dick: oh my god what have I done
Jason: Well congrats boys, youve been promoted from terrible brothers to terrible people!

Chat Name: B
Me: did you see the article?
B: Yes. I’ll have a talk with Damian about it when he gets home.
Me: okay
B: He didn’t tell any of you about this?
Me: …
Me: No. we didn’t know.

Chat Name: Damian
Me: …
Me: (typing…)
Me:
Me: …
Me: So uh Damian you know if you ever like need anything, all you have to do is ask. yeah…
Damian: …
Damian: I am not sure to what you are referring.
Me: Oh um I just saw the article Clark wrote.
Me: And yeah we should've listened to you about the zoo.
Me: So, sorry and uh good job on getting the facts. You know nice detective work.
Damian: …
Me: Yeah and um if you ever want my help for anything in the future, Im here I guess
Damian: …
Damian: I see.
Damian: Very well.
Damian: I can’t think of anything I wouldn’t be able to research on my own but if anything comes up I will notify you.
Me: Okay.
Me: Good.
Damian: …
Damian: Actually, there is something.
Me: ?
Damian: Could you explain to me what an aesthetic is?

Chapter Text

Kent Farm - Smallville, Kansas
10:05 A.M., Nov. 20th

Jon is bored. Jon hates when he’s bored and although he’s just waiting until his dad is ready to get started on the farm work for today, he can’t help but think this would never happen in Metropolis. Perhaps he was becoming a city boy, he supposes and then remembers that time last weekend when he said that Metropolis was too busy and crowded for a small country boy like him. Hmpf. Guess it’s not the city that’s the problem then. What is it that would Dami call him again? Annoyingly impatient and infuriatingly dramatic, he answers, hearing the robin’s posh accent in his head. What a hypocrite, he thinks fondly.

Just as he’s opening his phone to text his best friend to pass the time he gets a notification from Instagram. Taking any distraction he can, he’s surprised by the resulting post for a number of reasons. First of all, the whole Wayne Family is almost never in one place (Thank Rao, he thinks to himself) and Jason’s presence is shocking enough on it’s own. The next thing that he finds strange is that Damian didn’t mention the outing at all to him beforehand.

He’s been doing that a lot lately, Jon notices. They just hadn’t been talking as much when normally the other boy would be constantly taking up his time with complaints about his siblings and his classmates or explanations of new battle strats to apply during their monthly meet-ups. He used to never go a couple days without messaging Jon and while that was still technically the case their talks didn’t last as long. Something was different.

It’s the Teen Titans thing, isn’t it? It has to be. The times they did manage to hold a conversation the last few weeks mainly consisted of Damian's constant planning of how to please his father and avoid what he seemed to consider to be the worst fate imaginable. Personally, Jon thought that was a little extreme. I mean, sure Dami was far from what was considered friendly but Jon couldn’t see how being around other kids who also understood the struggle of living a double life could be that bad. After all it’s what connected him and Dami in the first place.

Maybe that’s where the uneasiness Jon had been feeling since the deal was first explained to him was coming from.

Damian joining another superhero team, without him, would surely mean the end of the Super Sons. Call him a pessimist but he couldn’t say for sure that their friendship would last long after that, not if all the time they spent discussing strategies and attack plans were spent not with him but with Dami’s new teammates.

It might be selfish of him but Jon had gotten used to being Damian’s only friend, had gotten used to Damian seeing all of his classmates as beneath him. His best friend was not exactly a sentimental type to say the least. Jon was pretty sure that even now if you asked Damian his opinion, he would probably still call Jon merely a business partner or just an ally maybe. So a small insecure part of him had liked hearing his friend complain about his day persona’s peers because if Damian thought all of them were not worth his time, that had to mean he thought Jon was and Jon liked that more than he had previously realized.

But would Damian still feel the same once he had met more kids like him and Jon? Others with superpowers, who were closer, who he was on a team with. Would he still prefer Jon when it would be much easier for him to prefer those he would be living with?

Jon didn’t want to learn the answer to that but as time went on it seemed inevitable to him that he would. Anyone with a brain could see that Damian wasn’t happy in Gotham.

Yeah you could say he wasn’t exactly a cheerful person in general but there were moments that ever present scowl on his face softened into more a smirk. Like when he had cleverly outsmarted an opponent in battle. Like those times after their monthly patrols when they settled onto a rooftop and rehashed some of the night’s earlier events. Those times when Damian was so sure he was worthy of pride that were becoming few and far between as he became more and more obsessed with improving.

Jon wasn’t really sure that was as necessary as the Bats were making it seem. He knew Damian better than almost everyone. He knew that Damian was far from a warm and fuzzy person but he also knew that he never did anything without a reason. He knew that he wasn’t the same brainwashed kid left on Batman’s doorstep years ago. He knew the way his brows hardened with determination when people were in need of saving. He knew the look on Damian’s face whenever they received intel that members of the League of Assassins were in town.

He also knew that Bruce Wayne didn’t understand any of that. He knew that Batman was a good hero but a subpar dad. He knew in his heart that it might be good for Damian to get away from that large, almost empty house and the ghosts of his past that were constantly being brought up from the dead and shoved in his face.

So, yes he could perhaps admit that Uncle Bruce may have a point but that didn’t stop Jon from wishing he had consulted the people who actually spent time with Damian and knew him much better than he did.

Jon could admit maybe his friend needed some time away from home but he didn’t see how sending him off to Jump City of all places was going to help. If Jon had any hope it would work, he might try convincing his parents to let Damian stay with them instead but while they might be a little bit sympathetic, neither had been that supportive of their friendship in the first place.

He’s still considering whether it would be worth it to ask his parents anyway when Kon knocks on his open door and walks into his room.

It takes a few moments for the words he’s saying to sink in and when they do they don’t make any sense.

“What do you mean Damian made another friend?!”

~ A Couples Minutes Later ~

His dad is lacing up his work boots when Jon runs down the stairs in a whirlwind of shock and teenage impulsivity. Apparently even Kryptonians aren’t immune to that.

“Dad, I can’t help you with the farm today! I have to get to Paris,” is all he manages to get out before he’s already out the door and in the air.

His super hearing delivers him the response: “Okay, be home before dinner!”

Jon takes some time on the flight to thank the universe his mom is away working on a story. Lois Lane would not have him let him go without any questions. Although perhaps some questions would’ve been helpful because it’s only when he’s halfway to Paris does he realize has no idea how to find this girl.

After a quick text exchange with Tim Drake that includes a well executed threat of blackmail he at least knows where he’s going.

Another ten minutes spent trying to figure out how to read the French street signs before realizing he can use his phone’s GPS and he’s standing in front of Tom & Sabine’s Boulangerie Patisserie.

Praying they can understand his English because he really does not want to try to put those public school French lessons to use, he opens the door and walks in.

…

Tom & Sabine’s Boulangerie Patisserie - Paris, France
5:31 P.M., Nov. 20th

Marinette has just had dinner and is reviewing the progress she’d made today on Grayson’s sweater and the design for Drake’s as well when her mother calls up to her that she has a visitor. Immediately, she panics.

The days when it wasn’t that unusual for her classmates to stop by every now and then are far behind her. Of the two people she was still fully certain of calling friends, one was deep into fencing training at the moment and the other had band practice on Saturday nights. So the chances of it being either of them were slim to none. A paranoid part of her worries that it’s Adrien wanting to have that talk she’d been avoiding for days now before realizing that was just about as likely as it being Kagami or Luka.

She’s relieved that her mother told her to come down instead of just sending them up because she’s still completely unsure who it could be. The worst case scenario is that it’s Adrien who probably wouldn’t want to talk about Lila with her parents nearby anyway. In the end, there was really no way she could’ve guessed who her visitor was because once she does make it down she’s pretty sure she’s never met the smiling black-haired boy in front of her before.

She’s just about to give a confused greeting when she hears him mutter somewhat under his breath and most likely to himself in English, “What is with that family and blue-black haired, blue-eyed kids?” At least, she thinks that’s what he said?

“Um, hi can I help you?” she starts, unsure of herself not just because she has no idea who this person who asked for her is but also because rarely does she actually get the chance to practice speaking English.

He seems to understand her at least. He takes one of his hands out of his pockets and offers it to her. “Yeah hi. Nice to meet you. I’m Jon,” he introduces himself, that easy grin never leaving his face.

“Um, nice to meet you Jon, I’m Marinette,” she says as they shake hands.

There’s a very obviously awkward silence as they both stare at each other. Marinette is tilting her head to one side in confusion looking at Jon, who is examining her with some level of puzzlement as well it seems although she can’t imagine why considering that of the two of them he’s supposed to be one to know why he’s here.

A couple seconds pass before Jon starts explaining himself. “I’m Damian’s best friend.”

If he thought that would clear up any confusion, he was sorely mistaken.

“Damian has a friend?” she asks, realizing as soon as the words are out that she probably should’ve phrased that better. Well, it was the first thing that came to mind.

Jon seems to find her confusion as strange as she finds his. He raises his eyebrows and gives her a once-over. “Yeah. Apparently, he has two,” he replies, skepticism clear in his voice.

“He’s never mentioned you,” she feels inclined to state, hoping that didn’t come off as rude as it might’ve sounded.

He turns to the side, slightly away from her and she’s pretty sure his words aren’t directed at her again as he says “Why does that not surprise me?” before turning back to face her once more.

“So, you’re Damian’s girl-friend?” he asks, surprising Marinette not only with the phrasing of the question but also the needlessness of it.

“Um well I’m Damian’s friend and a girl, so yes?” she responds.

“That’s what I meant,” he says.

In his relentless staring at her, Jon must have seen that she was starting to get tired of his lack of explanations. “Sorry, you just weren’t what I was expecting,” he says, his smile now a bit sheepish.

Once more his answers only prompt more questions but she’s given up on voicing them. She tilts her head again as she answers him instead with, “Well I wasn’t expecting you at all so the feeling is mutual I guess.” The words come out kindly as she intended.

A little of the tension between them fades at this. His smile widens a little and it’s then that Marinette realizes that both of their questions are probably coming off a little rude when in fact they’re both just stuck in an awkward and confusing meeting.

Finally remembering her manners, she offers “Do you want a pastry?”

…

“Oh, no. I’m good. I actually left my wallet at home,” Jon says but Marinette’s already taking a few things out of the display cases.

“Oh don’t worry about money. It’s getting close to closing time and whatever we don’t sell will be thrown out anyway. You allergic to anything?” she asks.

“Um, no, not allergic to anything,” he says, reaching to accept the offered plate, his eyes immediately drawn to the chocolate eclair on it. He had left Kansas right before lunch time and he didn’t go on a lot of transatlantic flights these days so he was hardly going to look a gift horse in the mouth.

Right before she’s about to hand it over she pulls it just slightly out of his range and with narrowed eyes asks, “What’s Damian’s dog’s name and breed?”

Jon’s so surprised by her quick shift in demeanor he has to ask her to repeat the question. Once he comprehends it, he has to silently respect her for making sure to confirm his identity.

“Titus, and he’s a Great Dane,” he answers with a smile before taking the once again offered plate of pastries.

…

“So, you’ve known Damian since he moved to Gotham?” Marinette asks while they’re settled on the bench they had occupied since deciding to eat their desserts in the park across from her house.

“Almost. We didn’t interact much that first year. He was too bitey back then,” Jon replies around a mouthful of croissant.

“Oh,” she says, not quite sure how to respond to that.

She doesn’t really need as Jon continues, “Damian really didn’t mention me at all?” Marinette can’t help but think he looks a little like a lost puppy when he says this.

She tries to be sympathetic as she answers him. “Yeah. Considering what Damian’s told me about his experiences with his classmates I honestly didn’t really think he had any friends.”

“He’s told you about that?!” Jon seems surprised by this.

“Well, yes. It’s come up. Why?” she says, seeing his skeptical look return to his face.

Jon shakes his head a little at the sky before answering, “You make it seem like he’s the kind of person to easily talk about those things.”

“I didn’t say he offered up the information easily. It’s just… We talk about those things a lot. I kind of have my own school situation going on right now. It’s something we have in common.” The questions and his sudden appearance are beginning to make her uncomfortable again so she takes out her phone and checks the time to avoid his gaze.

“We should probably be heading back in. It’s getting dark,” she states.

As they get ready to leave, she notices her phone still in her hand and a thought crosses her mind that it was really unfair of Damian to not give her any warning that Jon was coming. When he had met her friends, she had made sure that he was comfortable with it first. The whole situation showed a large lack of thought towards her. She was not going to let him just get away with that without bringing it up.

She unlocks her phone and starts to type.

…

Jon doesn’t know how to deal with this girl. It almost feels like the first time the Super Sons ran into Talia al Ghul on one of their missions, like getting to see a different side of Damian for the first time. However, whoever this was couldn’t possibly know Damian that well so why did it seem like she did?

She seemed nice enough but that just made it all the more confusing. How did Damian meet this girl and why was he already willing to talk to her about things he rarely even brought up with others, with Jon? How did he find her? Was she a hero? He didn’t think Paris had any and so far, there were no references of anything related to Damian’s other identity. If he had told someone else his secret, surely he would’ve mentioned that to Jon.

So she was just a normal girl then? Then why would Damian even bother to befriend her? He was already worried about losing his friend to other superheroes, he did not want to worry about regular girls being added to the midst. Girls… Was that it? Was he romantically interested in her? Jon couldn’t picture his best friend having a crush on anyone and surely not the friendly daughter of French bakers.

He’s going to have a lot of questions for Damian once he gets back, he thinks to himself before realizing that it would probably be in his best interest to not bring up this little field trip to Damian until he had more of an idea what he was dealing with or more specifically, how mad his friend would be when he found out.

Of course it’s only then that Jon starts to notice what Marinette had been doing on their walk back to the bakery while he had been trying his hand at deductive thinking. She had been typing and then right as he turns his focus back to her, she angles her phone’s camera towards him (He was currently mid-bite into the chocolate eclair he had saved as his grand food finale by the way) before turning it back and pressing what Jon really hoped was not the send button.

He was not so lucky.

He can hear the quiet sound of a new message that raises her brows when she reads it. She faces him. “Um, Damian wants me to give you this,” she says, handing him her phone.

As if his friend was the one with superpowers, the phone rings right once it’s in his hands. Since it’s already over from him, he answers.

The voice on the other end is quiet and controlled. “Jonathan Samuel Kent, what do you think you’re doing?”

Jon opens his mouth to stumble out a reply but he doesn’t get the chance to.

“Never mind, that’s obviously a pointless question because you seem to be doing something you could only possibly be doing if you weren’t thinking at all. So I will take it upon myself to once again fill my usual role as your only voice of reason, and tell you that if you are not back on this side on the Atlantic in five minutes, you will not like the result. Got it?”

Jon’s nodding before he realizes he needs to voice his answer although again it’s unnecessary.

“I’m going to assume you’re nodding over there. Good, because the clock has started ticking.” There’s a click as he hangs up and the call ends.

…

As she passes the phone, she’s starting to wonder if she fell asleep working again and this whole encounter is actually a dream. When it rings, she immediately hopes that’s not the case and starts to wonder what the voice on the other end would sound like… If he speaks as formally as he writes, if he’s still as proper when he’s angry as he seems to be right now, although she can’t imagine why. She’s the one who should be a little upset with him.

Jon answers the call and she tries her best to not lean over towards him and make it look obvious that she’s trying to listen in.

She can’t hear anything Damian is saying from her place less than two feet away from Jon. She sort of expected him to be yelling but he’s definitely not. Although it seems to Jon, he might as well be as he quickly pales and looks incredibly sheepish, with his shoulders lifting up toward his ears and a tight smile on his face. He starts to run a hand through his hair.

If she had tried to picture it before, whatever she would’ve expected from Damian’s best friend this was certainly not it. Someone who smiles easily would not have been her guess. Maybe the easily suspicious part made sense, maybe that was something he and his best friend had in common.

Although the circumstances were definitely not what she would’ve wanted them to be, she can’t help but still be glad for this opportunity, to get another piece to add to the puzzle of who the boy on the other side of the ocean was that was receiving the messages that contained some of her most personal thoughts.

Now that she was pretty sure this wasn’t a dream, she couldn’t help but admit that Jon made Damian feel more real to her, like he couldn’t possibly be a prank Lila was playing on her now. Deep down she had never really believed that to be a possibility but it didn’t stop that niggling worry to linger, one that came from a voice that had cemented a place in her conscience over the past couple of years.

They had just made it to the bakery entrance when the call seems to end before Jon even says a single word. This surprises her until she remembers who’s on the other end.

Jon hands back her phone and scratches the back of his neck before announcing, “It’s getting pretty late. I should probably be getting home now but it was nice meeting you Marinette. Oh and thanks for the pastries. They were really good.”

She only manages to say, “It was nice meeting you too,” before he gives back his plate and starts quickly walking away.

She calls out her return to her parents and heads back up to her room, completely thrown off balance by the boy who seemed to appear out of thin air and leave just as suddenly. Perhaps mystery was another thing he and Damian had in common.

Just then her phone chimes with an incoming message. Speak of the devil, she thinks before seeing if Damian will shine any light on his friend’s out-of-nowhere visit.

(Spoiler alert: he doesn’t.)

Chapter Text

From the phone of Marinette Dupain-Cheng:

Chat Name: The Child Prodigies (If you don’t look closely)
Me: Sooooo
Luka: ?
Gami: Yes?
Me: Damian and I havent talked for a few days
Gami: …
Gami: Is there something wrong with that?
Me: Nooo well actually it’s been more like a week and its just…
Me: We’ve talked almost every day since we met.
Gami: I see.
Luka: Mari, are you going through withdrawals?
Me: Haha no I just it’s weird.
Me: …
Me: I mean what if I did something wrong?
Luka: Oh I highly doubt thats the case.
Luka: Is there any reason for you to think that?
Me: Not that I can think of.
Luka: So dont worry about it. Maybe hes just busy or something. It is getting close to finals.
Me: Right. I’m sure that’s it.
Gami: Are you doing that thing where you say you’re sure about something but in reality that’s not the case?
Me: …
Me: maybe
Me: its just we havent talked since that visit from his friend and the whole thing was just really weird and super awkward and i dont know what to do what if it changed things what if his friend didnt approve and now he doesnt want to talk to me
Luka: Okay. Deep breaths.
Luka: …
Luka: First of all nothing about that situation was your fault Marbear.
Gami: Yes.
Gami: If anything, he should feel bad for springing his friend on you without any warning.
Luka: Secondly have you tried talking to him? I mean is he ignoring you or has it just been a while and youre getting worried?
Me: …
Me: The second one
Luka: Okay then how about you just start by saying hi alright?
Luka: We’ll see how it goes from there.I just dont think thinking about it too much is going to do you any good. Okay?
Me: …
Me: Okay.
Me: Yes. Let’s just rip off the bandaid.
Luka: Sound good?
Me: Yeah. Let me text him right now.
Gami: (If he doesn’t say hi back, do I have permission to stab him?)
Me: NO!
Luka: (Permission granted.)
Me: (laughing crying emoji)
Me: I love you two
Gami: We love you too, Marinette.
Luka: Yeah what she said.

Chat Name: Mr. Postscript
Me: Hi
Mr. Postscript: Hello Marinette. How are you?
Mr. Postscript: We haven’t talked in a while. I apologize. I’ve been very busy with a project this past week.
Me: Oh! No problem. I’ve been good. I’ve gotten a lot of work done on the gifts. I’ll have to send you pictures later. I think you’ll be impressed.
Mr. Postscript: I’m sure I will be, although I hope you’re not overworking yourself.
Me: Nah. Working actually helps me when I’m stressed or have a lot on my mind. It gives me something else to focus on.
Mr. Postscript: I see. Drawing does the same for me, or the violin albeit not as much, and being around animals of course, always.
Mr. Postscript: Has it been an especially stressful week? I noticed there were quite a few “akumas” the last couple days.
Me: Eh. More so than others, less so than some and yeah the akumas can be a pain but my mind’s been focused on other things lately.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Is your classmate still bothering you?
Me: A little.
Mr. Postscript: Is that so? Is he incapable of taking a hint?
Me: Honestly, yeah. Adrien’s actually kinda like you in some ways. He didn’t exactly have a traditional childhood and he’s not the best at understanding people.
Mr. Postscript: From what you told me about him, I can’t picture us being similar at all. Quite the opposite in fact.
Me: Oh you’re certainly very different but you have some things in common.
Mr. Postscript: What’s that supposed to mean?
Me: …
Me: Not anything bad.
Me: You know that right? That’s not what I was trying to say.
Mr. Postscript: Still. I’m not sure what’s the point of pointing out our similarities if we’re more different than anything. Surely, you know I would never treat you as unacceptably as he did.
Me: I never meant you were the same. I just said he also had a non-traditional childhood. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I don’t like the idea of having something in common with someone you don’t even want to be around now.
Me: …
Me: Oh.
Me: Yeah I wouldn’t like a comparison like that either I guess.
Me: All I meant was I can understand why Adrien made the choices he did but that doesn’t mean I agree with them. I know you would never stop talking to me just because other people told you too.
Mr. Postscript: Of course not.
Me: The only reason you would ever stop talking to me is because you didn’t want to, not because someone else told you to, right? You do what you want.
Mr. Postscript: That I do, and I can’t imagine ever not wanting to talk to you.
Me: Well…
Me: you didn’t talk to me for the last few days.
Mr. Postscript: Not because I didn’t want to. I had school, a project, and my family’s antics taking up my every waking minute and while I wanted to fill you in on everything, when I finally had a moment to spare it was already late in Paris.
Me: Oh. Right.
Mr. Postscript: I feel it’s only fair to point out that you also did not message me, leading me to believe you were busy.
Mr. Postscript: Working that is, or perhaps now it would be more accurate to say you were busy worrying.
Me: …
Me: That’s not inaccurate to say.
Mr. Postscript: I hope you don’t think I was in any way ignoring you.
Me: Nooo… It’s just…
Mr. Postscript: Yes?
Me: The last time we talked was the whole John thing and you seemed pretty upset about it and I know we talked afterwards and everything seemed fine but we didn’t talk after that and John was nice but it didn’t really seem like he liked me very much and honestly I was just kinda surprised and confused when he was here and well I hope I didn’t come off as rude.
Mr. Postscript: …
Me: I would like some warning next time please.
Mr. Postscript: I was pretty upset but at Jon, not you. If it was up to me, I certainly would have told you about it beforehand and made sure you were up to meeting him in the first place. However, and I realize now I should’ve explained this earlier, I did not know Jon would visit you.
Me: Oh
Me: Wait what?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. If Jon seemed upset or unfriendly, it was probably because I didn’t tell him about you and he felt betrayed for some reason.
Me: Oh i see. But if you didn’t tell him who did?
Mr. Postscript: My sister did without my knowledge and I assure you I am angry at the both of them right now, but not at all atyou.
Me: Really?
Me: You and John seemed fine the last time we talked.
Mr. Postscript: Yes. Well he admitted his mistakes and I have been gracious enough to allow him to make amends.
Me: Ah yes very gracious of you
Mr. Postscript: Indeed, and I assure you once he gave up the ridiculous notion of me having betrayed him, he admitted you made a very good first impression. You had his good opinion as soon as you fed him.
Me: Oh good I’m glad.
Me: Sorry for getting um upset earlier I just missed you and was worried I’d done something wrong
Mr. Postscript: You didn’t do anything wrong. You know I would tell you if you did, not that I ever imagine that happening.
Me: Yeah
Me: You would.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I missed you as well. You don’t know how many times I wanted to pick up my phone and fill you in on what’s happened this week, or hear about yours, time zones be damned. Pardon my English.
Me: Well why don’t you fill me in now and how about next time no matter how late it is message me anyway. Even if I don’t see it till morning, I’d rather talk to you when I can than not at all.
Mr. Postscript: Very well. I will. Now, are you certain you’d like to hear everything? Even I wasn’t prepared for all that occurred.
Me: Well now you have to tell me. I’m curious.
Mr. Postscript: Then let’s begin with Monday when Drake, you might remember him as the brother I have the most strained relationship with, offered his assistance with a project I was working on.
Me: Oh. That’s great!
Mr. Postscript: It was unexpected to say the least, and I was quite suspicious at first but he’s actually very useful when it comes to certain matters. At first, I was worried he was trying to take over my work but he’s respected my authority on the matter so far.
Me: As he should. I never like people telling me how to do my own job. Well, unless they have more experience but that’s another thing.
Mr. Postscript: No, in some ways it applies here as well. The project I’m working on is connected to the family business, and although he’s older, I’ve been raised to inherit it since birth while he only started preparing for it after his adoption. Still, he has a little more experience in certain fields. I’d say the only people in our family who’re perhaps better than him at research are my eldest sister- adjacent, definitely, and my father, possibly. His skills in that regard have certainly been helpful.
Me: It’s cool that you have people in your family with similar interests. I love my parents but they don’t always understand me when it comes to my work. Don’t get me wrong, they’re still always supportive but I can’t ramble on about stitching techniques or fabric types expecting they’ll be able to follow along.
Mr. Postscript: I haven’t thought of it like that before but I suppose I am fortunate in that sense.
Mr. Postscript: Although, perhaps fortunate is a stretch. Drake’s knowledge does come at the cost of the rest of my family’s involvement. I believe he opened the floodgates. By Tuesday, almost all of them were trying to assist me, and none as efficiently as Drake. Their talents lie better elsewhere.
Me: I can imagine that might be a bit tedious to deal with but still, isn’t it great they support you?
Mr. Postscript: I suppose.
Me: Okay, so what else happened?
Mr. Postscript: Well on Wednesday I learned Grayson was moving back in.
Me: That’s your eldest and favorite brother right?
Mr. Postscript: That’s correct. At least for now, I’m not finding Thomas to be unpleasant company.
Me: …
Me: Is he the possibly soon-to-be brother?
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
Me: I think I’m going to start needing a notepad to keep up with your family.
Mr. Postscript: It’s best not to bother at all. It gets tedious quite fast.
Me: I’ll take your advice on that.
Me: So the move? Are you happy about it then?
Mr. Postscript: I suppose?
Mr. Postscript: I mean of course.
Mr. Postscript: Honestly, I haven’t really formed an opinion on it yet. I find the whole situation very odd. He appeared quite settled where he is now.
Me: Huh. I mean I don’t know him but sometimes people can seem content on the outside regardless of how they feel on the inside.
Mr. Postscript: Yes. That’s true.
Me: Did he give a reason for moving back?
Mr. Postscript: He said he thought my niece would like the space of the manor better, and that she would be surrounded by family that way.
Me: Oh well that makes sense. Also, you have a niece? Maybe I shouldn’t abandon the notepad idea just yet.
Mr. Postscript: Yes, I have one niece, no others or any nephews. You’re right. It would seem like valid reasoning if it weren’t for the fact that my niece is currently living with her mother and since they live so far away, they rarely visit. They did so recently but that only means it will probably be some time before they do so again.
Me: Weird. Maybe he just misses her? Did you point any of that out?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. Not in such blatant terms but I did mention I hadn’t heard news of her returning anytime soon.
Me: And?
Mr. Postscript: His response was, I quote “Well then maybe I just miss you.”
Me: Aw.
Me: Your brother seems like a softie.
Mr. Postscript: Yes and I admit it can be endearing but I don’t want him to leave a job he seemed to enjoy because of us. His presence, while welcome of course, is simply unnecessary at least all of the time. He has a tendency to be bordering on overbearing when he’s distressed about something.
Mr. Postscript: I can’t help but wonder if his return is related to my father’s ultimatum and the approaching deadline, whether he wants to spend more time with me in case I’m sent away or like my father, is concerned with my behavior.
Me: …
Me: Well if it’s the former, he’ll be very disappointed he moved for nothing since there’s no chance of your father being unhappy with the gifts I’m making.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
Mr. Postscript: I’m sure that’s true.
Mr. Postscript: And if it’s the latter?
Me: I don’t think it is Damian.
Me: I think it’s much more likely he just misses you.
Mr. Postscript: Yes well in any case, he’ll be moving back in over the next couple weeks. That was the main part of Wednesday worthy of interest.
Me: So anything interesting about Thursday?
Mr. Postscript: Thursday was the celebration of the mass murder of an innocent species.
Me: Um???
Mr. Postscript: I believe Americans call it Thanksgiving and the French don’t observe it, yes?
Me: Oh. The famous Turkey day. Yes I’ve heard of it and yes, we don’t celebrate it here.
Mr. Postscript: I’m glad to know at least one country is civilized enough to not base an entire holiday on the murder of a specific type of animal.
Me: …
Me: Yes. I imagine it holds little appeal to a vegan.
Mr. Postscript: To put it lightly.
Me: So how’d it go then?
Mr. Postscript: Well my estranged brother who never shows up for holidays defied everyone’s expectations this year. Not only did he come for dinner, he actually spent the night this time.
Me: Which one is this? Jason? It sounds like Jason or is it Drake? I’m confused.
Mr. Postscript: Yes, it’s Jason but I will continue to refer to him as Todd.
Me: Okay. What happened?
Mr. Postscript: Shockingly, nothing.
Mr. Postscript: He didn’t speak much to my father which is hardly a surprise but he helped Alfred make dinner and talked to my aunt a bit.
Me: It went well then?
Mr. Postscript: Where Todd’s concerned, yes. Dinner, however, was a different matter.
Me: Oh?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Are you familiar with the term “Tofurkey”?
Me: Um no.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Basically, it is tofu that is supposed to resemble a turkey and it’s what we had for dinner.
Me: Okay… So it wasn’t good or something?
Mr. Postscript: Oh I enjoyed it very much. Alfred’s cooking is always excellent. However not everyone in my family seemed as … satisfied. I don’t think my aunt in particular liked it. She glared at my father who for his part, claimed to enjoy it.
Mr. Postscript: Normally, Alfred just makes me one of my favorite plant-based meals and everyone else has a typical American dinner but apparently this year my father decided to combine the two, hence the Tofurkey.
Mr. Postscript: I admit I am relieved a poor bird was spared from our dining room at least, however I’m not certain a holiday was the best time to introduce my siblings to vegan meat options.
Me: Yeah, I can see how they might not go over well.
Mr. Postscript: I think they all found it palatable at least, as to be expected with Alfred’s superb cooking, but I think they still would’ve preferred their regular dish. Todd mentioned Alfred wasn’t giving much head notice so I believe in time he will improve upon the recipe he was going off of.
Me: I’d like to know how that goes. When do you think you’ll be given Tofurkey Try #2?
Mr. Postscript: I’m not sure but I’ll give you my review when it’s done.
Me: So all in all, did you have a good holiday?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. I’d say so.
Me: That’s great. I’m glad.
Me: Is your family staying with you for a while? Did you get to do something with them yesterday too?
Mr. Postscript: Most of my family will stay over for the weekend. My aunt’s left early but the rest are still here. They all live relatively close anyway.Yesterday we engaged in Laser Tag.
Me: Ooh. I’ve always wanted to try that. Did you win?
Mr. Postscript: Well I was on a team with Todd and Thomas. Todd’s the best shot out of all of us but the opposition had Cain who’s the quietest and sneakiest out of everyone.
Me: Wait Cain?
Me: Which one’s Cain?
Me: I don’t remember a Cain.
Mr. Postscript: Cass.
Mr. Postscript: Cass is Cain.
Me: Oh. Gotcha. Carry on.
Me: So who won?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Fortunately for us, Grayson was too busy trying to show off and less focused on winning, Drake fell asleep after the eighth round, and Thomas was pretty good at predicting their strategy. We won 6-4
Me: Nice!
Me: Wait a minute.
Me: You played 10 games?!
Me: ANd your brother fell asleep? During the game?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. It was pretty close in the beginning and our family has an unspoken rule that you have to win by at least two points. The other team always demands a chance to tie.
Mr. Postscript: As to your other question, Drake falls asleep anywhere. When the sleep deprivation finally catches up to him, it wastes no time in taking him out.
Me: When you say fall asleep, do you mean that literally? Is he okay?
Mr. Postscript: Yes, literally, and if by okay you mean functioning typically for him, then yes. He’s okay.
Me: Okay…
Me: You weren’t kidding when you said you had an exciting week.
Mr. Postscript: Yes. Even by my family’s standards, it was a more eventful one.
Me: Has anything happened yet today?
Mr. Postscript: Not yet. My siblings and I are leaving soon to go to the arcade.
Me: That sounds fun.
Me: My maman’s calling me down to dinner now but I’ll talk to you tomorrow?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. I will regale you with tales of my victories then.
Me: Well I’m looking forward to that. Just out of curiosity, what are you planning on winning?
Mr. Postscript: Everything, but I believe Grayson specifically challenged me to a game of something called DDR. I’m not familiar with it but I’m sure I’ll pick it up quickly.
Me: Now I’m really looking forward to hearing how that goes. I’ll be rooting for you.
Mr. Postscript: Thank you angel.
Me: Bye Damian.
Mr. Postscript: Goodbye Marinette.
Me: …
Me: I missed you.
Me: Sorry I know that’s silly.
Mr. Postscript: Perhaps.
Mr. Postscript: If that’s the case, then we’ve both been a bit silly this past week.
Me: …
Me: Talk to you tomorrow then?
Mr. Postscript: Tomorrow then.

Google Search History
adrien agreste
adrien agreste sightings
lila rossi
Ladybug
what does it mean if someone hasnt texted you in a while?
coffee shops near me
coffee blends
Kagami Tsurgi
Gotham news alert
24 hour fabric store
Jagged Stone interview
Mdc
Tofurkey?

Chat Name: Mr. Postscript
Mr. Postscript: Since you have given me permission to message you regardless of the time difference, I have decided to not wait until tomorrow to inform you of my family’s ridiculousness and how it led my eventful week to continue being such.
Mr. Postscript: Perhaps it is unfair of me to blame my whole family for this particular incident. Really the blame lies solely with Todd and Drake.
Mr. Postscript: Are you familiar with “air hockey”? I admit, my knowledge of French arcades, arcades in general actually, is rather lacking.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I chose to believe your silence thus far to mean you have taken my previous advice and are currently resting in which case I will proceed with my story and answer any questions you may have in the morning or whenever you read this.
Mr. Postscript: So basically my brothers (Todd and Drake) participated in a game of “air hockey”.
Mr. Postscript: I’ve mentioned before my own tensions with these brothers in particular, however they have their own tumultuous relationship and I believe that’s led them to develop an above average amount of competitiveness with each other..
Mr. Postscript: At least this is what Grayson says. I’m not certain it wasn’t just natura; they would try their best to win.
Mr. Postscript: Although perhaps they were a bit extreme.
Mr. Postscript: In any case, it was very intense and may have drawn a few observers who unfortunately witnessed... Well it’s very hard to describe and I’m not entirely sure how they managed it…
Mr. Postscript: In short, the result was this: The “air hockey” disk ended up hitting an employee in the forehead.
Mr. Postscript: Accidentally, of course, but also effectively. The unfortunate party suffered a gash on their head and my father will be covering their medical bills.
Mr. Postscript: The rest of the evening was pleasant however.
Mr. Postscript: Apparently, DDR stands for “Dance Dance Revolution” and your faith in me wasn’t for naught as I picked it up quite quickly I believe. Also, I don’t think Grayson understands that improv will not help him with this game. In any case, by the end of the day I was able to best nearly every member of my family. The only competition I may have now is Cain but we did not face each other today.
Mr. Postscript: Besides participating in my own game of “air hockey” with Grayson, (You will be pleased to know I won that as well), I mainly observed my siblings and their own amusements. Drake was surprisingly decent at a game called “Deal Or No Deal”. Thomas seemed adept at racing related games. Gordon (This is one of the sister- adjacents) was very good at the claw games. She won quite a few prizes from those. I received a stuffed dragon from her. Brown (This is the other sister-adjacent) spent most of her time throwing a ball at clown faces. She was also very good and it was very amusing to watch.
Mr. Postscript: Anyway, I believe that sufficiently summarizes the afternoon.
Mr. Postscript: I hope you have a good night’s rest. I’ll await your response in the morning.
…
Me: Good morning! What a story to wake up to. So, yes we have air hockey here although it’s hard to imagine what you described as the same game I know. I had a couple friends who used to like dancing games like the one I think you played. I’ve always wanted to try them myself but well, I’m a bit clumsy. I’m happy to hear you won. I’d agree it doesn’t seem like a game that’d reward artistic interpretation but maybe you should mention that to your brother. Perhaps he knows something we don’t. It could be more fun that way. It sounds like your family had a good time. Maybe I need to convince my friends a trip to the arcade is in order. I want to win a dragon of my own. I’m quite fond of them myself.
Me: Oh and sorry for the late reply. Your assumption was correct. I got my first good night’s rest in a while and might’ve slept in.
Mr. Postscript: You don’t need to apologize for that. It’s what I wanted, and good morning to you too.
Mr. Postscript: So do you have any questions?
Me: I mean…
Me: I’m sure the accident put everything on hold but I am wondering who won, Todd or Drake?
Mr. Postscript: They tied.
Me: Oh.
Me: I can’t tell if that’s a good thing or not.
Mr. Postscript: I’m experiencing the same struggle myself. On the one hand, there won’t be any resentment from a losing party or gloating from the winner. On the other, I don’t think a tie satisfies either of them. In any case, Grayson has banned them both from air hockey for the time being so the result will stand as is.
Me: Well let me know if they ever get a rematch or if you ever play against your sister at DDR. I’m very invested now.
Mr. Postscript: I will.
Mr. Postscript: Now I realize I have been monopolizing the conversation recently with talks of my family so I feel it’s only fair you tell me how your week has been.
Me: I mean compared to yours, it was practically boring.
Me: I got some work done, had to make a presentation for school. There were a few more akumas than usual like you mentioned but they were really just annoying.
Me: Oh! I have to show you Grayson’s sweater. It’s almost done. Expect an email later today.
Mr. Postscript: I look forward to it.
Me: Sorry I wish I could stay and talk but I promised my parents I would help in the bakery and I kinda already slept in.
Mr. Postscript: I understand. Till next time then.
Me: Yup. See you then.

AKUMA ALERT!
Princess Fragrance (Click here for a summary of previous powers) spotted at College Francoise Dupont. Please find shelter if in the near vicinity.

Chat Name: Mr. Postscript
Mr. Postscript: Marinette! I got the akuma alert. Are you safe?
Mr. Postscript: It’s at your school.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I understand you probably can’t text right now but I’d appreciate if you’d let me know as soon as you are safe.
…
Mr. Postscript: Are you safe yet?
…
Mr. Postscript: I’m reading through articles and they say akumas are actually pretty common among your classmates. I believe it’d be in your best interest to transfer schools immediately.
Mr. Postscript: I’m awaiting the news that you are not in harm’s way.
…
Mr. Postscript: Do akumas typically last this long?
Mr. Postscript: I have a Statistics exam next period and I have no idea how I’m supposed to concentrate.
Mr. Postscript: Hopefully, it’ll be over by then.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I don’t mean to make light of your situation.
Mr. Postscript: I’m sure it’s much worse from you.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I hope you’re alright.
Mr. Postscript: I hope that much is obvious by now.
Mr. Postscript: Even if you aren’t, please let me know when you can.
…
Mr. Postscript: I don’t like your heroes. Is that cat one making jokes right now? Does he have no sense of emergency or professionalism?
Mr. Postscript: Todd would hate him.
…
Mr. Postscript: At least the Ladybug one seems competent. Although I wish she would hurry and use her fix-it power.
Mr. Postscript: Is that why you’re not replying? Are you injured?
Mr. Postscript: It can fix injuries right? It must.
…
Mr. Postscript: If you’re wondering why I’m still filling your phone with messages, suffice to say I’ll have to reschedule that exam.
…
Mr. Postscript: Are you alright now? I’ve been looking through past articles but it’s still unclear whether the Ladybug’s powers heal physical injuries and not just property damage.
…
Mr. Postscript: Marinette?
…
Mr. Postscript: Marinette, the akuma was defeated almost a half hour ago. Please update me on your wellbeing.
…
Mr. Postscript: Surely the Ladybug’s power would’ve fixed your phone if you’d broken it somehow.

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date: November 29, 2021 10:47 A.M.
Subject: A Reply Is Not Optional

In the event that your phone is broken, you may email me to tell me you are safe after today’s events.
Damian.

Postscript: In the event you have not received all my messages, I will take the time to say I am slightly concerned about your lack of a response and would like to be reassured that you are well.

Chat Name: Mr. Postscript
Mr. Postscript: Marinette, the akuma has been gone for nearly an hour. If I don’t get a reply soon, I might have to book a flight.
…
Mr. Postscript: Are you okay?
…
Me: DAMIAN!
Me: Sorry I was separated from my phone when I ran to find shelter. I’m okay though. Sorry for worrying you.
Mr. Postscript: I am relieved to see you are alright but why did it take you an hour to return to your things?
Me: …
Me: Sorry. I was delayed.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: By?
Me: Um. Adrien found me after everything went back to normal and we decided to finally have our talk.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: “We” or “he”?
Me: …
Me: Come on Damian. I’m glad we finally got it over with. It’s not like I could’ve avoided it forever.
Mr. Postscript: Of course not.
Mr. Postscript: Not if he’s willing to take advantage of you in a vulnerable state.
Me: …
Me: I’m fine Damian! Really. I’m sorry for worrying you.
Mr. Postscript: Stop apologizing!
Mr. Postscript: It’s not your fault I was concerned!
Mr. Postscript: It’s the fault of that stupid butterfly man and it’s the fault of your “friend” who wouldn’t even allow you to reach your things before putting his needs above your own.
Me: I told you I didn’t consider him a friend anymore.
Mr. Postscript: Then why are you still unable to acknowledge how he has wronged you?
Me: …
Me: I’m tired. Can we do this some other time? It’s been a long day.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Of course angel.
Mr. Postscript: How hypocritical of me to be doing exactly as he did.
Me: No!
Me: You’re not.
Me: You’re not Damian.
Me: I just need to rest. Please don’t blame yourself.
Me: And I’ll try not to either.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I’m very relieved you’re safe.
Me: …
Me: Later then?
Mr. Postscript: Later. Get some rest.

From the phone of Adrien Agreste:

Chat Name: Marinette
Me: Hey Marinette! I really liked your presentation in class today! I’m sorry Lila interrupted but everyone was still really impressed!
Marinette: Message not received.

Chat Name: Unknown Number
Unknown Number: Leave Marinette alone
Me: …
Me: Who is this?
Me: How did you get this number? How do you know Marinette?
Unknown Number: That information is none of your concern. All you need to know is she has powerful friends who won’t allow you to continue harassing her.
Me: Whoa. Wait a minute.
Me: I’m not harassing her.
Me: And I’m a friend of hers too!
Unknown Number: …
Unknown Number: You dare call yourself that?
Me: …
Me: I’m sorry I think there’s been some sort of misunderstanding.
Me: (typing…)
Unknown Number: I highly doubt that.
Me: Marinette and I are friends. I’m not harassing her.
Me: Did you say you’re a friend of hers too?
Unknown Number: There is no “too”.
Unknown Number: My loyalty is to Marinette. Yours so obviously isn’t.
Me: …
Me: What do you mean?
Unknown Number: What I mean is that “friends” don’t harass each other.
Me: Okay. Like I tried to tell you before, I haven’t been harassing Marinette. I’m not sure who told you that but they’re wrong.
Unknown Number: …
Unknown Number: Oh?
Unknown Number: So you’ve haven’t been constantly seeking her out, trying to get her alone?
Me: …
Me: I have yeah but that isn’t harassment. I just wanted to talk to her.
Unknown Number: …
Unknown Number: …
Unknown Number: …
Unknown Number: In case you are genuinely that idiotically clueless, I will spell it out for you.
Unknown Number: Repeatedly trying to get someone to do something they don’t want to do is harassment. Marinette does not want to talk to you. Leave her alone.
Me: …
Me: Did Marinette tell you she didn’t want to talk to me? She seemed fine talking to me today.
Unknown Number: After you cornered her after an akuma attack?
Me: …
Unknown Number: Let me ask you this. Has she given you any indication that she wanted you to, or in any way encouraged you to talk to her?
Me: …
Me: No.
Me: She hasn’t.
Me: …
Me: Who are you again?
Unknown Number: …
Unknown Number: You can call me Marinette’s guardian angel, or perhaps it would be more accurate to say I’m her guardian demon, because if you don’t stop bothering her, what I’ll do to you will be far from holy. Unknown Number: Do you understand?
Me: …
Me: I think so.
Me: I’m not sure actually.
Unknown Number: Your complete indecisiveness doesn’t surprise me at all. You are exactly as I’d imagined.
Me: …
Me: Look I might not know who you are but just because you know who I am doesn’t me you know me.
Unknown Number: …
Unknown Number: You’re right. I don’t know you and frankly that doesn’t bother me in the slightest.
Unknown Number: I might not know you but I know this.
Unknown Number: At some point you’re going to have to decide what kind of people you want in your life, and the kind of people you’re willing to cut ties with to keep them.
Unknown Number: …
Unknown Number: Perhaps you’ve already made your choices.
Unknown Number: I don’t know you but right now, from where I’m standing, I would say you chose wrong.
Unknown Number: …
Unknown Number: Goodbye, Adrien Agreste of Place du Châtelet, 75001 Paris, France.
Unknown Number: Do heed my warning. It’d be better for all of us if you did.

From the phone of Lila Rossi:

Chat Name: My Agent
My Agent: He’s not happy.
My Agent: Why did you switch places at the last minute?
Me: The other model wasn’t budging.
My Agent: …
My Agent: Very well.
My Agent: …
My Agent: There will be a meeting soon to discuss your performance.
Me: I hardly think that’s necessary. It’s not like it’s a new development.
My Agent: Then we need to discuss a change in strategy. It’s not optional. You will be approached shortly.
Me: Understood.

From the phone of Marinette Dupain-Cheng:

From:[email protected]
To:[email protected]
Date: November 29, 2021 8:24 P.M.
Subject: A Reply

I’m safe.
Marinette

P.S. I’m sorry for making you worry but I’m also happy you care.

Chat Name: The Child Prodigies (If you don’t look closely)
Me: I cant get your new song out of my head Luka. Its so good.
Luka: Thank you melody
Gami: Yes I enjoyed it as well. I wish I could hear it in person.
Me: We’ll getcha out of that training room someday Kagami.
Gami: I hope.
Luka: And if we can’t I’ll just show up at the door with my guitar.
Me: Ooh yes always an option
Gami: Enough about that. How did your conversation with Damian go?
Luka: Yeah youve been suspiciously silent about it.
Me: It went well.
Luka: Oh?
Me: No seriously it went really really well
Me: You were right Luka. I just needed to rip the bandaid off and we were off talking like we usually do.
Luka: Ah so that’s why you’ve been silent.
Gami: Yes. I think she found someone she’d rather talk to.
Luka: My dear Kagami I think we’ve been abandoned.
Me: Oh hush
Luka: So everythings good then? You guys are back to normal?
Me: Well…
Gami: Oh?
Me: …
Me: So he may have signed up for akuma alerts and may have freaked out a bit when I didn’t reply right away when he asked if I was safe.
Gami: I see. I do wonder how it would seem to someone outside of Paris.
Luka: Yeah. How freaked are we talking?
Me: Um
Me: Resorting to emailing when texting doesnt work kind of freaked?
Luka: Oh
Me: Oh and we mightve also had a fight about Adrien…
Luka: ???
Gami: Why did you fight about Adrien?
Me: …
Me: Hypothetically
Luka: Uh oh
Me: I may have mentioned to Damian how I was trying to put off that talk Adrien seemed to be wanting to have with me and he didn't really like the fact that we did have that talk today and it caused me to take a little longer to let him know I was okay
Gami: …
Luka: …
Gami: He approached you after an akuma?
Me: Well we kinda ran into each other on our way back to the classroom
Luka: …
Luka: Yeah no I’m with Damian on this one
Me: Hey! Traitor! You didnt even hear my side
Luka: I dont need to hear you plead Adriens case any more than I have this past year. Cornering you after an attack? Thats going a little too far for me
Gami: I agree.
Gami: Even though I wanted to still consider him a friend I can’t excuse his behavior of late.
Me: Guys he didn’t corner me.
Luka: Did he give you a way out?
Me: Well no
Gami: Then he cornered you.
Luka: Or at the very least took advantage of the situation.
Me: Anyway yeah there was that but I think we’ll be fine. It was just awkward and intense
Gami: You’re considering forgiving him? Marinette, I don’t know if that’s wise.
Me: …
Me: What? I thought you two liked him. I mean he didn’t really do anything wrong.
Luka: Marinette do you really think that? I mean I like Adrien but he hasnt exactly been a good friend lately.
Me: What??
Me: …
Me: Oh no I meant me and Damian will be fine. Things with Adrien are going to stay as they are.
Gami: Oh.
Gami: I see.
Gami: Good.
Gami: I mean, I’m glad you believe you and Damian will remain on good terms but I know the situation with Adrien isn’t ideal.
Luka: Yeah Damian seems like he really cares about you.
Me: …
Me: He felt concerned for me.
Luka: I know
Gami: As he should.
Me: …
Me: It was just nice to see you know.
Me: I wish Adrien didn’t have to ruin it.
Luka: He doesnt have to ruin anything. If anything, it shows that Damian’s concern isnt limited to akuma attacks.
Me: Oh
Me: Yeah
Luka: (Ten bucks she’s blushing over there.)
Gami: (I’ve told you before Luka. I don’t take bets I know I’ll lose.)
Me: How do I manage to simultaneously have the best and worst friends?
Luka: I really don’t know. Kagami got any ideas?
Gami: You’re like a people magnet Marinette. You attract anyone regardless of how good they are.
Luka: Yeah thats exactly it
Luka: Youre just too amazing. You have to dial it down Mari.
Me: This is why I like Damian more than you two.
Luka: Ouch hurtful
Gami: I see he’s completely redeemed himself then?
Me: He made it clear he wanted to talk to me too. He just couldnt because he was busy and because of the time difference.
Luka: I guess that makes sense
Gami: Did he also explain siccing his friend on you?
Me: Yeah actually. Apparently he had nothing to do with that. His sister told John.
Luka: Oh
Gami: …
Gami: Why would his sister have your address though? You said he came to the bakery right?
Me: …
Me: Huh
Me: You’re right. That is weird.
Luka: I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into with him Marinette.
Me: …
Me: Me too.
Gami: (This is why we shouldn’t encourage relationships with blackmailers.)
Luka: (We have to give them the freedom to make their own mistakes, honey.)
Me: *Sigh*

Chapter Text

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey Damian?
Mr. Postscript: Hello Marinette. How are you doing?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m good. Really.
Mr. Postscript: I’m relieved to hear that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’ve just been thinking about something…
Mr. Postscript: Yes?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I was wondering how your sister knew my address?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Well.
Mr. Postscript: You see.
Mr. Postscript: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: ?
Mr. Postscript: Actually I’m not quite sure about that.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Um. okay.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You didn’t tell anyone? Since you found my contact info, I assume you had it.
Mr. Postscript: Yes. I did come across it in my research however, I haven’t told anyone.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hmmm…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Do you think your brother found it during the phone theft?
Mr. Postscript: No.
Mr. Postscript: I didn’t keep any record of it anywhere and if he did find it by chance, I doubt Todd would share it with Cain. They’re not particularly close.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well I guess if you found it in your research, I suppose it wouldn't be that hard for someone else to do the same, which isn’t exactly a comforting thought.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Was it hard? Could she have done it on her own?
Mr. Postscript: If she really wanted to? Probably. Don’t worry, it wasn’t exactly easy however like I said, research runs in the family.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So that explains it.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I suppose.
Mr. Postscript: Actually…
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I believe I’ve made a mistake.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: ?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That totally doesn’t sound ominous at all.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What’s wrong?
Mr. Postscript: She could’ve found your address if she really wanted to but I can’t think of any reason why she would.
Mr. Postscript: Really want to, that is.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh.
Mr. Postscript: Not to mention if she did for some reason, why would she give it to Jon of all people? That doesn’t make any sense.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait but you’re sure it was her right?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I was.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: But now you’re not?
Mr. Postscript: Now, I think I may have been a bit hasty in calling my favorite sibling a traitor.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh. Yeah…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, if not her, who else could it have been?
Mr. Postscript: Honestly? Not an insignificant amount of people. Like I said, research runs in the family. As does an above average concern with other people’s business.
Mr. Postscript: Cass is actually the only one who doesn’t suffer from the latter.
Mr. Postscript: And now I’ve gone and ruined my relationship with her.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey now. I’m sure she’ll forgive you when you explain.
Mr. Postscript: That’s assuming she’ll give me a chance to, which might be too much to ask for considering I most certainly did not give her one.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, I mean it did happen right after I met her so I get why you thought that way. I’m sure she’ll forgive you if not immediately than eventually.
Mr. Postscript: I hope so.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know that offer for me to make her something still stands. It would need to be something small if you want it in time for Christmas but there’s also no deadline on an apology gift.
Mr. Postscript: You can apologize through gifts? I thought that was just a way to buy someone’s clemency. I genuinely want my sister to forgive me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Um
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: No yeah. Apology gifts are an actual thing. I think? Is that not an American thing? I sorta thought it was universal…
Mr. Postscript: I wouldn’t know.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Right.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, apology gifts are less like a bribe and more like a… peace offer I guess you could say. The gift itself isn’t the apology. It’s usually given with one. They’re normally more personal than regular gifts and meant to show how much you value the person you wronged. Does that make sense?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Okay. I see.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Are you sure you have time to make something else? I’ll pay you of course but I know you already have a lot on your plate.
Mr. Postscript: Actually, I’ll figure something else out.
Mr. Postscript: Cass isn’t the only one wronged in this situation. You’re also a victim of whoever in my family decided to violate your privacy.
Mr. Postscript: I am sorry about that. I can’t recall if I said it before. Sometimes I forget how… eccentric we are.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey! Wait a sec.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Dami, please.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t want to. Okay? I swear. I don’t do that anymore.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: As for having a lot on my plate, I know I said I got a lot of work done last week but that may have been an understatement. All three pieces should be ready to ship in the next few days and winter break starts soon. I’ve got time.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Also what your family did wasn’t your fault, so don’t apologize for it!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Now, stop feeling sorry for yourself and let’s get to making things up with Cass.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Okay angel.
Mr. Postscript: Thank you.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Of course, Dami. You’re welcome.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Now what did you have in mind?

…

Mr. Postscript: Is everything alright Marinette?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: everything is a bit of a stretch. Why do you ask?
Mr. Postscript: I couldn’t help but notice your tweet.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: what tweet?
Mr. Postscript: I believe my brother called it a “key smash”?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: oh yeah
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: it’s finals time
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: i’m running on expresso and the tears of grammar nazis right noe
Mr. Postscript: I see?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait you follow me on Twitter?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You posted it on the official MDC page.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: merde
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: pardon my french
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: give me a sec
Mr. Postscript: Do I have permission to use that as well?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Of course. Ive alway been more of a girlboss than a gatekeeper.
Mr. Postscript: What?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Nothing sweetie
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I will text you again when you are… well.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: thatd be a long wait. How about tomorrow?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. Tomorrow.

…

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I think you might want to give Late Night Marinette her space for the next week or so.
Mr. Postscript: On the contrary, I find her amusing. Drake has explained some of her references to me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see.

…

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey Dami. I’m at the mall now. Finally had a free afternoon. And by free I mean, I have a half hour before I need to get back to studying. The week before finals is never fun. Anyway, what do you think of this one? Do you think she’d like it? (Image Attached)
Mr. Postscript: Yes. It looks good. You said you’ll be able to embroider over the black?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Mmhmm. Shouldn’t be a problem. The material feels perfectly right for it and the gold thread I picked up should show up well on it.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: That’s good.
Mr. Postscript: Thank you again.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Stop. I told you. It’s okay. I all but insisted.
Mr. Postscript: All but?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Haha.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So what’re you up to?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: I’m working on a project with my brother right now.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: In fact, I’m afraid I have to put my phone down. He isn’t happy with my being distracted.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh so I’m distracting?
Mr. Postscript: Yes. Very.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, I should probably get back to work anyway. Good luck. Let me know when you want a distraction
Mr. Postscript: I’ll let you know when I can afford one.
Mr. Postscript: Good luck with your studying angel.

…

Mr. Postscript: Marinette, if you never hear from me again, tell my father it was Todd.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Todd?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Your gun-wielding brother?
Mr. Postscript: Precisely.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What’s going on??
Mr. Postscript: I believe I’m being kidnapped.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: What?
Mr. Postscript: Well, actually I did enter this vehicle willingly but I was expecting Alfred as the driver.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So your brother picked you up from practice?
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And???
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: How is that kidnapping?
Mr. Postscript: We are not headed home.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay where are you heading?
Mr. Postscript: That’s my point. He won’t disclose our destination to me.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Can you guess?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Apologies for the delay. He was attempting to build up a rapport.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: A rapport???
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: give me a second to find a translation.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Ohhh
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see. And how was he doing that?
Mr. Postscript: He asked about my day and practice session.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I see.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So, your brother doesn’t usually ask about those things?
Mr. Postscript: This brother doesn’t usually acknowledge my existence.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh.
Mr. Postscript: He says we’re almost there. I’ll update you shortly.
…
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You haven’t actually been kidnapped have you?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I really have no idea how American emergency numbers work.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Let me google it.
…
Mr. Postscript: You mentioned you haven’t had any animals because of your parents’ bakery. Are they not allowed or simply inconvenient?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Um. Both probably?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You haven’t been kidnapped, I take it?
Mr. Postscript: Not today. What about your friends? Are any of them looking for a companion?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Um. I don’t think so.
Mr. Postscript: I understand Ms. Tsurgi frequently travels. Does Luka care for animals?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Uh I’m not sure you can have pets on a houseboat. WHy are you asking all of a sudden?
Mr. Postscript: (Picture of a small, brown dog with a scar over one eye in a kennel, snarling at the camera.)
Mr. Postscript: His name is Bruno. He needs a home.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh. What a good boy!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You’re at an animal shelter?!
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
Mr. Postscript: Don’t worry, it’s a no-kill one.
Mr. Postscript: All the dogs seem well taken care of. There’s a decent play area in the basement and a satisfactory walking schedule. I’m sure most of them will be adopted soon.
Mr. Postscript: The staff says Bruno’s been here the longest though, that no one wants him.
Mr. Postscript: They’re wrong.
Mr. Postscript: I’d take him home if I could but apparently he doesn’t get along well with other dogs and I already have Titus.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Aw. I wish I could keep him too but I imagine he’d want an adopter a little closer to home.
Mr. Postscript: Right.
Mr. Postscript: Indeed.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait so that’s where your brother took you?
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well is he looking for a dog?
Mr. Postscript: Oh. No.
Mr. Postscript: Todd also travels a lot. He doesn’t stay in one place for very long. He only brought me here so we could volunteer for the afternoon and he made me swear I wouldn’t try to take any home without Father’s permission.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Aw. Shucks.
Mr. Postscript: I’m going to see if any of my other contacts would be open to adoption. I’ll message you again soon.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay! Good luck!

…

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hey, did you have any luck finding Bruno a home?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Yes and no. He has a home now but not because of anything of my doing.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Oh?
Mr. Postscript: It seems Bruno took a liking to Todd that was strong enough to get him to reconsider his aversion to having a pet.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Really?!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Your brother’s going to keep him?
Mr. Postscript: I’m just as, actually more so, surprised than you are. He seemed very set against it. The paperwork has been filed though. It’s official.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait but you said he couldn’t. He travels right?
Mr. Postscript: Apparently, he’s planning to stay around for a while.
Mr. Postscript: I’m helping him get Bruno settled. His apartment isn’t as small as I feared and we’ve gotten all the supplies he needs. Leashes, toys, treats, food, a bed. He may appear a little reluctant but he’s thoroughly prepared.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Aw Damian! I’m so happy!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: And this way you get to check in on him!
Mr. Postscript: Yes.
Mr. Postscript: I’m quite pleased with this solution myself.
Mr. Postscript: (Picture of Bruno in a dog bed chewing on a toy robin.)

…

Mr. Postscript: Marinette?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Damian?
Mr. Postscript: I see you’re still awake.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Mmhmm very astute of you. Then again if you expected me to be getting any significant amount of sleep the last weekend before finals, you wouldn’t know me as well as I thought you did.
Mr. Postscript: How is it coming along?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Nope.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: No more school talk.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Id hoped messaging you would give me a break from all the numbers and sentences that are starting to look like little letter snakes.
Mr. Postscript: I see.
Mr. Postscript: Well, I was just seeing if you were available for another movie recommendation.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Yes!!!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: That is exactly the kind of distraction I could use.
Mr. Postscript: I’m glad to be of service.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: So, what’re we in the mood for? Are you watching it with your family again?
Mr. Postscript: Only Todd and Bruno are here this time. I’m still helping to get him settled. I should be going home tomorrow. That is, if Todd agrees. He seems hesitant to be left on his own with him still.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Aw! That’s cute!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Well, I’m just going to take a shot in the dark (see what I did there) and say Todd likes action?
Mr. Postscript: I believe so, yes.
Mr. Postscript: Actually he says he doesn’t care about genre all that much.
Mr. Postscript: He also wants me to tell you that that pun was terrible.
Mr. Postscript: And that puns in general are terrible.
Mr. Postscript: But especially gun puns.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay. Ouch.
Mr. Postscript: I would like to state for the record, I am just the messenger and those are not my words.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Sureee. Well, do you have any preferences this time?
Mr. Postscript: No. I trust your judgement.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Hmmm.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I’m thinking now might be a good time to get you started on the classic childhood staples.
Mr. Postscript: Very well.
Mr. Postscript: What’s the title?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Star Wars: A New Hope.
Mr. Postscript: Alright.
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: It says here that that’s episode four though. Should I watch the others first?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: NO
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Trust your movie sensei.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Any casual Star Wars fan will tell you four comes first.
Mr. Postscript: That doesn’t make any sense.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Shhhhh
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Enjoy
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Im going to bed
Mr. Postscript: Very well. Goodnight angel.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Tell me how you like the movie in the morning kay?
Mr. Postscript: I will.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Gnight Damian.

…

T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Sooooo?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Did you like it?
Mr. Postscript: …
Mr. Postscript: Yes
Mr. Postscript: Ill give you all my thoughts later.
Mr. Postscript: I’m
Mr. Postscript: still waking up at the moment.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Okay!
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Wait! But it’s 10:30 over there!
Mr. Postscript: Yes. Well.
Mr. Postscript: Todd and I decided the best experience would be to watch the entire, I believe he called it the original trilogy at once.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You watched all three of them?!
Mr. Postscript: I believe we’ve established that, angel.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I better get a full review of each one.
Mr. Postscript: Oh, yes.
Mr. Postscript: Believe me, I have a lot to say on the subject.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: I look forward to it.
Mr. Postscript: I will let you known when I’m fully awake/
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: Sounds good.
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: …
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You know, Damian?
Mr. Postscript: Yes?
T.G.Y.T.T.B.: You really should get to sleep sooner.

Chapter Text

From the phone of Tim Drake:

Chat Name: idk other ppl ig
Duke: Was anyone going to tell me Jason got a dog or was I just supposed to pass by him in the park?
Dick: Duke! I feel like I havent seen you in forever. Stop by the manor some time.
Duke: …
Duke: Oh sure! I mean Im sure we’ll run into each other sometime… somewhere
Jason: leave him alone dick. kid knows to avoid a dumpster fire when he sees one.
Duke: Oh hey Jason!
Duke: Um
Duke: Nice dog
Dick: Wait you got a dog?!
Jason: His name’s Bruno
Dick: Wait when did you get a dog???
Duke: That seems… fitting
Dick: Wait why does Duke get to see your dog but I don’t?
Jason: he just said he saw me at the park idiot
Duke: Yeah that was a surprise
Duke: Went to help another cat in a tree and there he was
Duke: Fierce little guy isn’t he?
Jason: sure is
Duke: I hadnt realize you wanted one
Me: He didnt he got suckered
Jason: …
Jason: Youre just jealous that I got further with Damian in a day then youve gotten all week asshole
Dick: Come on Jason. He was just teasing.
Me: You just took him to an animal shelter and let him talk you into adopting the first set of puppy eyes his landed on. wow what a master plan. totally defied everyone’s expectations there. although you showing up at all will do that.
Dick: Tim!
Jason: …
Jason: Good call Thomas. Damian might appreciate having at least a couple siblings he can trust when this all blows up in our faces. Stay as far from these parasites as you can. They might go through your messages next.
Dick: Oh for God’s sake.
Dick: Jason.

Google Search History
Marinette Dupain-Cheng
zoologists based in Gotham
gotham university zoology dept
brother bonding tips
family counselor
how much do you get paid on Dr. Phil?
dog gifts
dog bakery near me

Chat Name: ppl that aren't Damian
Alfred: Damian’s violin teacher called today to ask how many tickets we need for his winter showcase. It’s this Saturday at 5:00 p.m. and should last about two hours. Is anyone interested in attending?
Dick: Wait this Saturday??? I thought it was next week!
Alfred: It is this Saturday, December 11th.
Jason: I’ll be there, Alfred.
Alfred: Excellent, Master Jason. I trust you’ll be by sometime this week to pick up your ticket.
Jason: …
Jason: Wednesday work for you? Damian wanted to sketch Bruno anyway. Figure I might as well bring him.
Alfred: I look forward to meeting him.
B: I’ll be going of course, Alfred. Tim, would you mind handling the Gotham Museum's new wing opening for me? Normally, I would just tell them I had a family matter to attend but with the MWF footing so much of the bill, I think one of us should attend.
Me: …
Me: Actually, I was planning to go to Damian’s showcase.
B: …
Me: Is Lucius free?
B: That’s fine. I’ll ask.
Babs: Me and steph will go. Dont worry I’ll make sure she behaves. We’ll see you there.
Dick: YES! Got a coworker to cover for me. Put me down Alfred. I’ll drive down Friday night. That’s now my last day with the BPD.
Duke: Can I come too? I’ve heard him practicing sometimes. He’s pretty good.
Alfred: Of course, Master Duke.
Dick: Wait B, what about Cass?

Chat Name: Jason
Jason: bruno liked the cake
Jason: whered you even get that?
Me: Theres a dog bakery next to my apartment
Jason: your penthouse you mean
…
Jason: A dog bakery? thats a thing?
Me: Sure is.
Jason: huh
Jason: you should take the kid there
Me: I don’t need help with Damian. One sleepover doesn’t make you an expert.
Jason: …
Jason: Are we really doing this?
Me: You started it.
Jason: …
Jason: You want to take a trip down memory lane, count the points? fine. Lets hope our brother’s fine waiting till your done.
Me: …
Me: *you’re
Jason: You know what?
Me: I’m an asshole?
Jason: …
Jason: Yeaaah
Jason: ?
Me: …
Me: Is that why he doesnt like me?
Jason: Yeah probably
Jason: …
Jason: And I bet you make him feel guilty
Me: ?
Me: Guilty?
Jason: Well
Jason: He did try to kill you that one time
Jason: …
Jason: Probably feels pretty bad about that
Me: …
Me: Right.
Me: …
Me: He probably would like the bakery.
Me: They had dog-edible cannolis.
Jason: oh
Jason: Titus would love those.
Me: True.
Me: …
Jason: …
Me: Did you really get him to call you by your first name?
Jason: Oh yeah
Jason: Just threaten to call him al-Ghul in return and there you go
Me: That sounds… effective.
Me: Well…
Me: Thanks for the pro-tip.
Jason: …
Jason: Anytime.