Archive of Our Own ^beta

Adam sat in an armchair, his head in his hands. In the bathroom, Ronan was rinsing the blood off his knuckles. Adam was trying to ignore the sound of the water flowing down the sink. The events of the weekend were playing on loop in his mind.

***

The weekend had begun so well, perfect even. Adam got a paper back for a class with an A, he’d cleared his schedule and Ronan had arrived. After dinner, they went back to the air bnb apartment that Ronan had rented for the weekend and became reacquainted with each other.

In the morning, Adam went out to pick up breakfast and they enjoyed it in bed. They’d spent the day exploring Cambridge together before they had to get ready for Adam’s friend’s birthday party.

They’d gone out. The party was being held in a bar not far from the university. Ronan sulked as he took in the crowded room. He said nothing, knowing that Adam wanted to be here. Adam headed to his group of friends while Ronan went to order them drinks. He felt a stab of loneliness as he watched Adam embrace his friends. Adam had a life here, one that largely didn’t include him. He watched for a few moments as Adam chatted to different people, more sociable that Ronan could ever have imagined him being. Ronan tried to swallow the jealousy in his throat and took Adam his drink.

“Hey guys, some of you haven’t met Ronan, right?” Adam beamed at Ronan and took the drink he was offering. Ronan nodded at the few people nervously saying hi to him.

It was later on in the night, they’d moved onto a different bar, this one a little louder. Ronan sat at a table. Adam had gone to the jukebox. Ronan watched as he was approached by another guy, tall and preppy. They began to talk as Adam selected different songs. The guy reached around and pulled Adam closer to him. His hand stayed on Adam’s waist as he said something into Adam’s good ear. Adam laughed. Ronan saw red. Before he even had time to think about his actions, Ronan was across the room, pulling the stranger away from Adam. He punched him square in the face. Ronan grabbed the stunned Adam’s hand and pulled him out of the bar. Once outside, Adam tried to pull his hand free, but Ronan’s grasp wasn’t letting go.

“Ronan Lynch.” he said calmly. Immediately Ronan dropped Adam’s hand.

“Adam,” he began.

“Don’t. Not here. Let’s just go back to the apartment.” Adam struggled to keep the emotion out of his voice but could see a number of his friends coming to the door of the bar.

“You don’t have to come back,” Ronan told him, “I mean, if you didn’t want to. You can go back to the dorm. I’ll be fine.” He could feel dread growing in his stomach.

“No, I can’t. Fletcher has company tonight.” Adam’s voice was still emotionless. They made their way back to the apartment in silence.

***

Adam heard the water shut off, a minute later, the door to the bathroom opened. He couldn’t bring himself to look up at Ronan.

“I’m sorry.” Ronan’s voice cracked. Adam took a breath to steady himself before he looked up.

“I thought we were done with this crap. What the hell was that?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t think.” Adam scoffed at this. “What can I do to fix it?”

“Punch something. That usually works, right?” Adam left the living room and headed to one of the two bedrooms in the apartment. He changed from his clothes into one of Ronan’s t-shirts and turning off the light, got into bed.

It only took a few minutes for Ronan to stop arguing with himself and follow Adam into the bedroom.

“I was jealous.” he mumbled from the doorway. The light from the hallway lit Adam as he rolled over to look at Ronan.

“The guy you punched, Jack, he’s as straight as they come.” Adam deadpanned. “He was telling me there was a guy dressed in black checking me out that looked a bit dangerous. I laughed, because he was talking about you.”

“You have this whole life here, that I’m not part of.” Ronan’s voice was hardly above a whisper.

“You are the biggest part of my life, Ronan. What do you want me to do? Not speak to anyone else? Not make any friends? Study, work and sleep until you come for the weekend? Don't I deserve more than that?"
Ronan looked at the ground, ashamed that he’d ruined their weekend.

“I’m sorry.”

“Two apologies in the space of half an hour. Someone should alert the press.” Adam snapped.

“I mean it.” Ronan promised. He and Adam regarded each other for a minute before he stepped into the room. Ronan took the pillows beside Adam and made towards the living room again.

“Where are you going?” Adam asked.

“Didn’t think you’d want to sleep in the same bed as me.” Ronan explained.

“First of all, there is another bedroom in this apartment. Second of all, get your stupid ass over here. Third of all, I’m still mad at you and I don’t care how much the word ‘sorry’ cuts your throat up, you will say it a record of three times because tomorrow, you are apologising to Jack.” Ronan crossed the room and put the pillows back on the bed. He pulled his jeans and shirt off and slid into the bed beside Adam. Adam waited for him to get comfortable before turning to him.

“You forgot to turn the lights off.” He smirked. Ronan huffed as he got back out of the bed to turn the lights in the hall and living room off. Adam allowed Ronan to hug him when he got back in the bed.

“Is this my shirt?” He asked.

“Shut up,” Adam replied. Ronan allowed himself the smallest of grins.