Archive of Our Own ^beta

They really were the perfect couple.

Roman- star football player, handsome, popular but not an asshole, friend to pretty much anyone.

Danika- theater techie, pretty, quiet but a good listener, got along with whoever gave her a chance.

It was the perfect facade. 

Together, no one would believe they were anything more than the roles they neatly fell into. They wouldn’t believe that Roman hated sports, that he longed to perform. They wouldn’t believe that Danika would rather be out there, on the field instead of backstage.

They wouldn’t believe that they’d trade places in a heartbeat.

They’d never believe they were drowning in their own pain and secrets.

They wouldn’t believe that Roman was gay or that Danika was actually a man.

It started on Valentine’s Day. Or the week prior, rather.

“Who are you asking to the dance?” Janus asked lazily, hunched over the lunch table three boys were sharing, half-heartedly stirring the school-provided yogurt he’d picked up that morning. It looked inedible but Janus didn’t seem quite ready to give up yet.

“Dance?” Roman echoed, eyes snapping away from under the table where his and Janus’s knees touched. He jerked it away instantly, hoping no one noticed. Damn, how hard had he zoned out? Not that he was doing anything wrong but normally he’d be more careful. Or at least more aware.

“You know,” Remus prompted, elbowing his brother in the ribs, “the Valentine’s Day Dance! The one everyone is talking about?”

“Oh.” Right. That. He’d tried to forget about that but time was creeping up on him. He supposed catching a break was a bit too much to hope for, was it? “I figured we’d all just go together like we usually do.”

“I wish,” Janus grumbled, dropping his plastic spoon and sliding the cup over to Remus. Remus plucked it up gleefully, as if he hadn’t just inhaled his entire meal and half of Roman’s. Growing boy, his eye. Roman had no idea how Remus ate so much. They were the same age, same weight, and had the same amount of activity and yet Remus was a bottomless pit that somehow never got fat. Roman would be jealous if he wasn’t used to Remus’s… Remusness. He had no idea how Janus put up with it though. “My mom’s been hinting at me to get a girlfriend ever since freshman year. I’m worried she’ll rope my dad into it if I don’t at least try to ask someone out soon.”

Roman wanted to say something about how he shouldn’t let his parents decide these things but Remus spoke before he could, loudly slurping Janus’s abandoned yogurt directly out of the cup. “Oooh! Who do you have in mind?”

“Natalie?” Janus responded with a shrug and Roman felt his heart pang ever so slightly. It made sense, he supposed. Natalie played lacrosse with Remus and Janus. He didn’t know her all that well but he supposed they probably spent a lot of time together when Roman wasn’t around. Janus smiled softly and Roman suspected he cared more than he’d like to admit. “She’s cool, I guess. And we’re friends so… yeah.”

“Nice. I’m thinking about asking out Emilia,” Remus responded, lifting the yogurt cup up to his face to lick out the contents. Roman wanted to cock his eyebrows at Remus’s choices. About girls and eating habits. But mostly girls. None of them knew Emilia all that well. She ran in a bit of a different social circle than them. He was pretty sure she played basketball? Or maybe she was on the debate team. Maybe both. Either way, she seemed a bit too good for Remus but, hey, Roman supported whatever his brother wanted to do wholeheartedly. Even if he was an idiot in all aspects of life. And annoying as hell. “What about you, Ro? Got anyone in mind?”

“I… don’t know?” Roman was pretty sure it sounded like he was lying but he actually didn’t know.

“Really?” Remus asked and he sounded genuinely surprised so maybe Roman’s tone had been more truthful than he thought. The messier of the twins threw his arms up in the air, sending the discarded yogurt spoon flying. Janus winced but made no move to pick it up, quickly distracted by Remus’s theatrics. “You’ve got like a million girls pining after you!”

“What?” That was… He didn’t like the thought of that. And he hated that he didn’t.

“Okay, maybe not a million, but I guarantee like half the cheerleading team checks you out after every game. Like, all of them. Every single one. And I’d bet my marbles on it. And you know how much I love my marbles. I’m sure one of them would be thrilled if you asked them out!”

“They’re not really my type,” Roman answered, trying to sound casual, but he could feel the muscles in his body tensing. Like a man tossed into frozen waters too cold to swim in, no life raft in sight. A dramatic sentiment, maybe, but Roman was the dramatic type.

“They’re cheerleaders, Ro. Cheerleaders,” Remus emphasized, putting the yogurt cup down to press his palms into the metal of the table and lean forward. Roman did that too when he wanted people to listen to him. He wondered which twin started it. Or maybe they’d both picked it up from the same cartoons. It was pretty cool when superheroes did that thing where they bent steel with their hands, even if it was an accident. “How the fuck are cheerleaders not your type?”

Roman felt his stomach tighten and panic rise up in his chest but Janus spoke up before he had the chance to say anything. “What about Danika?”

“Danika?” Roman repeated, so surprised by Janus’s suggestion that his anxieties were momentarily forgotten. It wasn’t like Danika was a bad option, he just thought she flew under Janus’s radar.

“You’re friends, right?” Janus asked. Without breaking his gaze, he put a hand on Remus’s wrist, keeping him from flinging anymore yogurt anywhere. Roman was momentarily impressed. They’d known Janus since middle school but it was still shocking that someone else knew how to keep Remus’s messiness contained. “She sends you scripts and stuff from the theater.”

“Um…” How did he know about that? Roman was so sure he’d only gotten digital copies. No hard evidence to hide and all that. Had Janus seen his phone? Had Remus?

“Don’t pretend like you don’t mouth along to the songs at every play we go to,” Janus responded, lips quirking into a smirk. Roman relaxed a bit. That was just Janus being Janus. Not Roman being… Roman.

“Ugh, how do you even know about that? It’s so dark in there,” Roman groaned good naturedly. It felt fake but he didn’t care. Superficiality was better than sinking. “But yeah, you’re right. We’re friends. Just friends. Not, like, secret crushes or anything.”

“Isn’t that how relationships start?” Janus responded, tipping his head, and Roman’s heart did things he wished it wouldn’t. 

“Popular jock unexpectedly befriending shy techie?” Remus questioned, eyes flickering into the distance before nodding. “Yeah. Sounds like a romance waiting to happen.”

“Fine,” Roman grumbled, shaking away any lingering unease. If it’d get his friends off his back… “I’ll consider it. I’ll text her later or something.”

“Oooh, you already got her number!”

“Shut up, Remus!”

Roman Kinglton to Danika Anderson

Today 9:43 PM

Roman Kinglton

Hey

U awake

?

Danika Anderson

yh 

whats up

Roman Kinglton

I’m going to ask you something word

*weird

So don’t freak out

Danika Anderson

k

Roman Anderson

Will you be my date to the Vday dance?

Roman could feel his body tense with anxiety from the moment he hit send. Why’d he let Remus and Janus talk him into this? Wait, that was a stupid question. He knew why. He was a raging homosexual who lived in a mildly homophobic neighorhood with a mildly homophobic family. And he totally had a thing for Janus. And he didn’t want him to know. Poor Danika. He suddenly felt like a massive asshole for asking her out like this when he knew it wasn’t going to go anywhere. Was this a thing straight people did? Ask out people they didn’t really like? It seemed like a straight person thing to do. Straight people were idiots. But if he was pretending to be straight, then being an idiot would be the right move right?

Roman stifled a groan. Why was this so hard? It looked so easy in movies. In movies, everything looked so easy. So light. Stuff happened and it always worked out. But in real life it was so… complicated. Feelings were hard and confusing and he was always struggling. Like trying to hide under water while keeping his head above the surface at the same time. Who the heck decided homophobia should be a thing? And romantic norms? They were so awful. And exhausting. He hated them,

He could still see the little dots moving at the bottom of Danika's side of the screen, occasionally stopping then starting again. She was still typing. How long had it been? It felt like a really long time. Should she be typing this much? Maybe he’d freaked her out. This seemed like one of those movie tropes. Popular football player dude asks out shy girl, she says yes because she doesn’t know how to respond to the attention, he turns out to be a creeper… Fuck he felt awful now. Was she still typing?

Roman Kinglton to Danika Anderson

Today 9:49 PM

Roman Kinglton

You can say no

I’ll be fine if you don’t want to

Consent

I like that stuff

Foundaion of relationships

*foundation

And friendships

Roman cringed slightly but he’d already hit send and he was pretty sure he couldn’t delete messages here. Fuck texting. Discord was so much better. The typing paused momentarily. Roman watched the screen closely before the typing resumed. He wanted to scream. This was so stressful.

What if she was going to say yes? Or did his weird consent spiel make it seem like he didn’t really like her and now she was going to say no? That was probably the best outcome here but he weirdly wanted her to say yes. A bigger, gayer part of him wanted her to say no but… Ugh. This was so confusing. Who invented closets? Being in the closet was so hard! Oh, she was done typing.

Roman Kinglton to Danika Anderson

Today 9:53 PM

Danika Anderson

im actually aroace. its kind of an uncommon term so like its fine if you dont know it. its short for aromantic asexual. basically it means i dont experince romantic or sexual attraction so idk if im the right person to… yknow but if u want to just go as friends thats cool

Roman mentally froze for a moment. He could feel his heart thundering against his ribcage and his stomach flipping in his belly but his mind was completely blank.

Roman Kinglton to Danika Anderson

Today 9:55 PM

Danika Anderson

roman? 

u alive bro?

plz dont be freaking out

Roman was definitely freaking out. She was queer? He knew, like, one other queer person and he was always terrified to interact with them out of fear of being outed by association. But one of his existing friends was queer? This was a better outcome than he could’ve hoped for.

Roman Kinglton to Danika Anderson

Today 9:56 PM

Danika Anderson

look 

just forget i said anything

plz dont out me

Roman suddenly realized how stressful his silence must be for his friend.

Roman Kinglton to Danika Anderson

Today 9:56 PM

Roman Kinglton

Thank fuck

Sorry

I just needed a sec

Just hella relieved

Wait that sounded mean

I’m gay

Waaaay closeted tho

Like, full Narnia

(hence the asking you out)

(fake the straight away ;-; )

(you’re the first person I’m telling btw)

Was kinda hoping you’d say no?

Mad respect tho!

Thx so much for telling me

Danika Anderson

in that case…

ah fuck

its like a bandaid

just gotta rip it off

im trans

i havent told anyone but like i already cam out once tonight might as well put both feet out the closet door

Roman Kinglton

hdjkslakjdhjkasd

Danika Anderson

lol gay keyboard smash

Roman Kinglton

Name?

Pronouns?

Danika Anderson

virgil 

he/ him

Roman Kinglton

Updating contact info

Wait I probably shouldn’t do that

My brother steals my phone sometimes

I’m just going to change it to your last name

Which sucks bc I love your first bame

*name

It’s like Dante’s Inferno

Anderson

o fuck

i didnt even realize

Roman Kinglton

Lol deadname infero

*inferno

Like you’re infernoing your deadname

It’s gone

On fire

Blasted to smiterhine

*smitherins

*smitherines

How tf do you spell it

Anderson

smithereens

ur not funny btw

Roman Kinglton

:p

Anderson

dont tell anyone?

Roman Kinglton

Ofc

Queer solidarity

Anderson

queer solidarity

Roman Kinglton

And speaking of queer solidarity

Wanna be fak straight with me?

If we fake date now

I can call you V forever

And everyone will think it’s Valentine

When its really Virgil

Anderson

omg fuck yeah

“My mom wants to meet you.”

Thunk.

“Oh?”

Thunk.

“She said something about wanting to make sure you were the right guy for ‘her little girl.’”

Thunk.

“Gross.”

Thunk.

Roman and Virgil were standing alone on the school’s football field, tossing a football between them casually. Roman had to say Virgil was a lot better than he expected. Not great but he surprisingly seemed to know what he was doing. Held the ball right, managed to get the ball spiraling most of the time, Roman was impressed. Roman still let him face away from the setting sun though. He was alright but his aim was still pretty bad and he didn’t need to get blinded on top of that. Besides, Roman could use the practice after football season ended. He didn’t want to get rusty.

It was about a week since Roman’s asking-out-turned-coming-out and he had to say things were going pretty well. They spent more time together but it didn’t really interfere with either of their existing friendships. Whenever Remus and Janus weren’t around, Roman would hang out with Virgil and his friends Logan and Remy. If Logan and Remy were busy, Virgil would spend some time with Roman, Janus, and Remus. Sometimes Natalie and Emilia would be there too which was nice. Roman thought it might be weird to suddenly have a gi- er, female presenting person in his friend group but it wasn’t. 

They spent time outside of school too, like right now. People who were dating went on dates, right? Not that this was a date. Neither boy really understood what went down on a date so their “dates” just turned into going over scripts or throwing a ball around. Apparently Virgil felt like he was missing out on some “prime male bonding activity” by not being able to play sports. Roman didn’t really get it, he wasn’t a big fan of sports and he played all the time, but it was nice playing casually. Even when he was just messing around with his brother or his friends, things usually got competitive. But, he understood the desire to do something he couldn’t, hence the scripts.  

He didn’t know what he’d been expecting but this was honestly the best outcome he could have hoped for. Still, there were some downsides. Roman wasn’t really a fan of walking Virgil to his classes or holding his hand in the hall but that was what people expected boyfriends to do. He tried getting out of it once but Virgil told him that Patton said it was cute and people would definitely notice if they stopped so Roman sucked it up. Kissing was less appealing and they tried to avoid it but sometimes it could be fun, Roman supposed. They never did it alone and they weren’t, like, making out in the locker room or anything but sometimes it was funny to see a cheerleader’s face when Virgil gave him a peck on the cheek. It wasn’t hard to look happy when they wouldn’t pick their jaws up off the floor.

Downsides were worth it though. Roman’s parents had been thrilled to hear he got a girlfriend. His friends congratulated him. Virgil’s friends seemed to like him. And, apparently, Virgil’s parents were buying it as well. As long as they kept playing their cards right, no one would suspect a thing.

“I know, right?” Virgil snorted as he tossed the hamskin back to Roman. This throw was a bit on the wild side and Roman had to reach up pretty high to catch it. He frowned. Not because of the throw, he’d played more than long enough to catch a bad throw. Bad throws usually meant something. “I used to think I’d be out by now but I can’t really see that happening anytime soon. I know I should be happy they’re not… I don’t know. It just feels bad.”

“I feel you,” Roman responded, shifting the football in his hands a couple times before slinging it back. 

Virgil caught it easily. “Do you?”

“Not in the same way, obviously. Must be so much worse for you,” Roman soothed quickly. He tried imagining it but it was hard for him. Too much of a disconnect. He wasn’t, like, stereotypically hypermasculine but he was still a masculine guy. And he liked that about himself. It was all he’d ever known. Anytime he tried picturing being stuck in another body, the image went fuzzy. Roman cleared his throat awkwardly, wanting to move on. “Last night my dad said something about wedding bells chiming. He might’ve been talking about Remus and Nat but it still kind of felt like getting punched.”

“Remus and Natalie are dating?”

“Um, yes? You didn’t know?”

“Aro,” Virgil answered with a humorless smirk. He took a step back and threw the ball as hard as he could, making Roman run. “We’re famously bad at reading romantic situations. Logan and Pat were dating for like four days before I noticed and I only knew because Remy told me. And they were, like, very openly flirting. I thought they were just… I don’t know, Remy calls their friends hot all the time. I thought that was just an allo friendship thing.”

“Allo friendship thing,” Roman snorted as the ball landed in his broad hands. He didn’t have to run far to catch it, Virgil didn’t have that good of an arm. Putting a bit more power into his throw than before, Roman hurled the ball back. “Is that like the aspec version of gay people complaining about straight culture?”

“Basically,” Virgil told him. His hands fumbled through the air and he missed the ball entirely. It bounced a few times, landing on its corners, and rolled around, making Virgil chase after it. “Anyway, have any idea how straight people do the meet the parents thing?”

“Nope,” Roman replied, popping the p. He frowned slightly as the ball rolled away from Virgil’s hand. “Need help?”

“No, I got it,” Virgil sighed and he got the ball back in his hands. He tossed it but his grip was bad and once again, his aim was a bit off. “In movies and tv shows and books and stuff, the meeting the parents is a big deal.”

“Really?”

The ball hit the ground. Roman hadn’t put much effort into catching it.

“I don’t fucking know. I hate that stuff.”

Roman laughed a bit. He scooped the ball back up. “I don’t really have the time for it but I like it. I think a lot of it’s exaggerated though. Media doesn’t really portray healthy relationships very well.”

“Really? Thank fuck. That shit looks awful.”

Roman snickered again. “Do the diamond thing with your hands. You know how to do that, right? Makes it easier to catch the ball.”

Virgil nodded and did as he was told. Roman threw the ball lightly and the nose of the ball landed cleanly in the gap between Virgil’s indexes and thumbs. “Thanks.”

“No problem. Think of it like… like surfing. Just keep it light and breezy but make sure your foundations are solid. It’s worth it to take the time to get a good grip,” Roman responded as Virgil took his time lining up his fingers with the lace on the top of the ball. “Anyway, we’re in high school. I don’t think this is very high stakes.”

“Excuse you, this is very high stakes,” Virgil retorted dryly as he tossed the ball back. It was a good throw and Roman caught it with a satisfying thump. “Meeting your parents, making a good impression, and not outing either of us sounds stressful as hell.”

“You know what I mean. We’re not, like, taking our parents to a fancy restaurant and asking them for their blessing to marry each other.”

“People do that the first time they meet their partners’ parents?”

Roman ignored him. He couldn’t tell if Virgil was kidding or being serious. “I think in high school, it’s just like a casual thing. Like you can just come home with me after school one day, say hi, chill for like an hour, and leave before they can do anything. Oh, Remus and I have a pet lizard. We can say you wanted to meet her.”

“Okay. Then what about my parents? When my sister got a boyfriend, they did a whole thing.”

“What’d they do?”

“I have no idea. I might’ve been in my room. Or I just blotted out the memory. This was like two years ago. You can’t expect me to remember stuff from that long ago, man. I didn’t think I was ever going to do the whole bring-a-guy-home thing so I didn’t pay attention. At all.”

Roman laughed. Gently, he put the ball down on the turf. The sun was starting to go down and a chill was sneaking up his sleeves. “It doesn’t have to go well.”

“What?” A breeze blew by, whipping Virgil’s long hair against his face. He made a face, like it was getting in his mouth and tucked it back into his hood. “What do you mean?”

“The goal is not to get outed, right? They don’t have to like me. Hell, they could tell you to break up with me but as long as we go to the dance and neither of us gets outed, we’ve won, right?”

Virgil pressed his lips together tightly as if thinking. He stuck his hands in the pockets of his hoodie and slowly began walking over to Roman, sensing that they were getting ready to leave. “I guess.”

“It’s not ideal,” Roman noted, putting an arm around his friend. “It’s like a… safety net. If neither of our parents like anyone, not the end of the world.”

“We should still try to make them like us,” Virgil grumbled as he headed towards the gate, Roman at his side.

“Yeah. I’m just saying-”

“I know what you’re saying,” Virgil sighed. “And you’re right. I just didn’t really think that long term for this charade.” 

“Me neither,” Roman admitted. Not for the first time, he felt a bit guilty about asking Virgil out in the first place with no intention of being… Well, an actual partner. “But I’m sure we’ll figure it out.”

“Fag!”

The word rang through the cool evening air, slamming into him like a bombora. He flinched as it struck him. Hard. Harder than he should have, maybe. His fragile calm shattered and cold panic flooded his body. Roman’s head snapped up and started swiveling around like a prairie dog. The abrupt fear was replaced by warm relief, relaxing his muscles, when he realized the slur wasn’t directed at him. The stab of guilt that followed didn’t do much to null it.

A distance away, Roman’s friend and fellow football player Toby was shielding one of Virgil’s friends. Roman was pretty sure his name was Remy. Behind them, Roman and Toby’s teammate Anton was sneering at them with a malicious glint in his eye.

“I can’t believe you want to fuck that thing,” Anton taunted, putting his hands on his hips. Toby’s eyes flashed in anger. Remy whispered something to him, probably telling him to let it go, but Toby wasn’t the type to back down.

“Remy’s not a thing. They’re my partner. Being genderfluid doesn’t make anyone less- You’re stupid,” Toby responded bluntly. Anton raised an eyebrow as Roman cringed. Toby didn’t exactly have a way with words. All he was doing was giving Anton more fuel. And Toby knew it. “Just… Leave us alone.”

“What a convincing argument,” Anton replied mockingly. He shoved Toby with one hand, causing both Toby and Remy to stumble back a step. Roman’s heart pounded, unable to tear his eyes off the scene. His body screamed at him, willing him to anything, even just breathe, but his limbs were locked. “You should be on the debate team with words like those, cuz we sure as hell don’t want a fag on the football team.”

That one stung a bit more. Weren’t football teams, like, supposed to be filled with gay guys? Roman didn’t actually know if that was true or just clickbait headlines he’d read online somewhere. Sports were actually famously homophobic, especially on the high school level. And the asshole seniors like Anton certainly didn’t help.

Roman willed Toby to stand up and punch the guy. He knew Toby was capable of doing it. He saw him deck a guy from another school when the team had an away game. Roman had no idea why but he was sure it was for something less than harassing him and his partner. Remy looked like he’d shut down, like he’d taken a beating before and was already prepared to take another. Toby may have been doing the right thing trying to comfort him but this whole thing would end a hell of a lot faster if he properly stood up for himself. Why wasn’t he doing anything?

“Whoops,” a sarcastic voice cut in. Roman snapped out of his thoughts and realized that Virgil had appeared out of nowhere and dumped a drink on Anton’s dress shirt. When did he get here? And why was he antagonizing the clearly queerphobic school bully? Did he want to get on his bad side? It was hard enough being closeted!

Anton spluttered. “You bitch! What was that for? Are you a queer too?”

Something in Roman’s brain clicked and he remembered he could move. Forcing a confident look on his face, he strut over and hooked his arm around Virgil’s. “No, she’s my girlfriend. And we don’t appreciate people bullying our friends.”

Anton opened and closed his mouth like a fish before turning away and scoffing. “Whatever. I have better things to be doing anyway. Later, losers.”

Roman didn’t realize he’d been holding his breath until Anton was walking away. He felt Virgil relax against him. They untangled themselves and turned to their friends. “Are you two alright?”

Toby nodded. “I think so.”

“Gurl, where did you get that drink?” Remy asked, demeanor suddenly changing. Any fear or nervousness on his face was suddenly gone. Where was the kid who’d just been cowering moments ago? This certainly wasn’t him.

Virgil grinned and held up the cup. It was, iconically, a red solo. “I just found it on the street when I was walking here. I picked it up to throw it away but I guess it came in handy.”

“Lemme see that.” Virgil handed Toby the cup. The taller boy held it up to his nose and sniffed it. “Damn, I thought it might be piss. Or alcohol. Yo, imagine if it was alcohol. I think they hired some cops with breathalyzers. Y’know, for random checks? What if Anton got breathalyzed? That’d be wild.”

Remy laughed, slapping his knee with animated spirit. Roman blinked, still reeling a bit. They were just acting like nothing had happened. Weren’t they scared? He shook himself. Maybe he was missing something. Cis-privilege, straight-passing privilege, and all that. He shook the thought away and cleared his throat. “You two want to hang around with us tonight? In case Anton comes back?”

Remy and Toby exchanged a glance. “Seth is Anton’s date tonight, I think. He won’t try anything with her around but sure. It’d be nice to have some company.”

Seth? How the hell did some jerk like Anton get a girl like Seth? She was so nice. And pretty enough that even Roman knew she was hot. She didn’t seem like the type to go out with Anton. Maybe it was his football-player charm, though Seth played basketball so she had plenty of chances with other sporty guys. It didn’t matter much though. It just meant Anton would get off their backs for a bit.

“My lady.” Roman dramatically offered Virgil his arm. He wasn’t wearing a dress or anything but he looked fancy and it was enough to spark Roman’s fanciful side. They were already pretending, why not go all out?

Virgil snorted but looked amused. He took his arm. “My liege.”

“I don’t think that’s right.”

“Shut up, Princey.”

“Ooh, Princey. I like that one.”

“Ugh, you weren’t supposed to.”

Roman could feel Toby and Remy’s eyes on them as he and Virgil continued to bicker. They entered the gym and the noise of the crowd filled his ears but he couldn’t hear it, ears solely tuned into the sound of Virgil’s voice. It was nice, even if it wasn’t perfect.

“Hey man, wait up!”

Roman came to a halt, cleats digging into the turf with the abrupt stop. He looked over his shoulder and saw Toby jogging up to him. The taller boy looked fine but Roman’s head instinctively swiveled, searching for Anton. Irrational, maybe, but Roman didn’t really want the guy seeing him interacting with… Well, anyone who was out. Horrible, he knew, but Anton’s politeness only lasted during games and as long as a coach or teacher was in sight. Any other time was fair game and the night of the dance had already gotten Roman on his bad side. He didn’t really want to go home and explain to his dad why he had a black eye or a busted lip.

Roman spotted Anton on the other side of the field. He seemed to be deep in a conversation with another one of their teammates. Both boys were animated, as if describing a play. They probably were. That was good. It meant Roman was safe from his words and gaze for now.

Roman let a friendly smile form on his lips as he looked up to face Toby. “What’s up?”

Toby came to a stop, leaning forward so his hands were on his knees. He was out of breath. Not from the brief run over, of course. Toby was one of the team’s best players and he’d worked hard in today’s practice. “I never had the chance to thank you for the other night.”

“Oh.” Roman felt his stomach twist with some unknown feeling. Anxiety, perhaps? Or maybe it was a good feeling. He couldn’t really tell but his heartbeat was still too irregular from all the exercise to tell his emotions apart easily. “It was nothing. Don’t mention it.”

“No, really. I mean it,” Toby insisted. He fell in step beside Roman and the pair began walking towards the street. Both were walking home today, it seemed. “Anton’s a scary guy. Most people wouldn’t want to risk crossing him like that. And, y’know, it’s not often straight guys stick up for people like me and Remy.”

Roman didn’t know what came over him but the words were leaving his mouth before he knew it. “I’m not straight.” 

Toby looked surprised. Roman slapped a hand over his mouth, eyes widening in horror. What the hell was he thinking? Sure, there wasn’t much risk in being outed by telling Toby of all people but still! He didn’t- He didn’t want to just tell people. He wasn’t ready to be out! And what was up with his mouth just saying things like that? What if that had been someone else? Like Remus. Or worse, Janus. Roman was pretty sure his entire life would be ruined if he blurted out his sexuality to Janus. Not that Janus was homophobic or anything. Roman would just be- Oh Toby was talking.

“Are you bi?” Toby asked. He scratched his nose. “Sorry for asking. I’m just surprised because… y’know.”

Roman shook his head. “Gay.”

“Oh.”

“Oh?”

“Well, it’s just... Danika?”

Roman wanted to bury his face in his hands. He’d forgotten about her! Wait, fuck. Him. Virgil was a him. His fake girlfriend who was actually his fake boyfriend. Oh, he’d dug himself into a hole, hadn’t he? “She knows.”

“She knows?”

“Fake relationship to keep our parents off our backs,” Roman replied, trying to sound casual. He shoved his free hand into his pocket so Toby couldn’t see him fidgeting. His fingers were moving so much he feared they’d fall off. “I kind of panicked when Remus and Janus started talking about girls before the dance.”

Toby nodded. “I feel you. So is Danika- Wait, actually nevermind. Not going to pressure you into outing her. If she’s even queer that is. People got all kinds of reasons for fake dating a gay man.”

Roman immediately felt a wave of relief. He flashed Toby a genuine smile. “Thanks.”

Toby waved him off. “Hey, I’m queer too. I know how to not be a dick.”

Roman snorted. “The bar isn’t very high.”

Toby rubbed the back of his neck and shot a glance over his shoulder. Roman knew he was eyeing Anton. His fingers curled around the wire of his helmet so tightly that they turned white. “Yeah… I really hope Anton doesn’t start picking on her. Like, I worry about Remy when I’m not around but Remy’s the social type. They’re always around people. Danika spends a lot of time on her own.”

Roman frowned. He hadn’t really thought about that. He really should have. “I mean… I spend a lot of time with her.”

“You can’t always be there.”

“I know,” Roman responded softly. 

“Maybe she’ll talk to Remy.”

“Maybe.” Roman didn’t think so. Coming out to Roman over text was one thing but coming out to his friend? Roman didn’t know if Virgil was ready to do that. Hell, Roman didn’t feel ready to come out to Toby when he did but it happened. Roman could roll with it but Virgil wasn’t as easygoing as him. 

“I hang around Remy and their friends a lot. I’ll keep an eye on her if you can’t,” Toby promised silently before breaking into a smile. He shouldered Roman, jostling the helmets in both of their hands. “And besides, I need more queer friends! This is so hype, man.”

Roman laughed and felt the last of his nerves wash away. Toby was right. It was nice to have allies and even nicer to have the support of others in the community. Until now, Roman hadn’t even realized that was something he needed. “You’re right. This is pretty hype.”

Roman was lying in bed, full lazy mode, when he opened his messages to text Virgil.

Roman Kinglton to V Anderson

Today 8:35 PM

Roman Kinglton

So

Prom

That

Roman bit his lip after his thumb hit send, nervous moths fluttering in his stomach. He wasn’t the most eloquent texter, was he? But it wasn’t like he had to worry about Virgil saying no so it didn’t really matter. This was an exchange of information, not a game of feelings. Still, Roman groaned and buried his head into his pillow and groaned. Even if this was all fake, it still made Roman feel like a dumbass sometimes.

“Your girlfriend sending you some hot shit?” Remus yelled from across the house. Roman’s head snapped up and his face went red. His parents definitely heard that. And even if he wanted his parents to think he was straight, that didn’t mean he wanted them thinking he was sexting!

“That was a stretching groan, not a sexy groan!” Roman shouted back, sounding appropriately mortified. He shoved his face back into his pillow and kicked his feet slightly, wanting to scream but knowing better than to do that. It was late, he shouldn’t even be yelling at Remus like this let alone screaming.

“I know a sexy groan when I hear one!” Remus howled, laughter carrying down the hall.

“Says the guy who got dumped after one dance!” Roman shot back. A low blow, maybe, but Remus seemed to be taking it in stride so he didn’t feel all that bad. Roman wasn’t even sure what happened between Remus and Emilia but it was a very real possibility it was Remus who ended things. He didn’t seem all that interested in her, though Roman wasn’t the most perceptive when it came to real life relationships. Stories? That he could get behind. Real life heterosexual partnerships? Definitely not.

“Don’t gotta be cuffed to know!” Remus hollered, still laughing. If they were face to face, Roman was sure he’d be wiggling his eyebrows with that stupid expression he always had when these things came up.

“What was that?” 

“Nothing Dad!” Roman hollard in response, lifting his head just enough that his voice wasn’t muffled. He really had no clue what was going through Remus’s mind when he started things like this. That child… At least Virgil would provide him some distraction. 

Roman Kinglton to V Anderson

Today 8:41 PM

V Anderson

yah 

what about it

Roman Kinglton

You know the table set ups?

V Anderson

no 

i thought u and ur friends were setting that up

Roman Kinglton

We did

Just wanted to check so I wanst repeating things

*wasn’t

V Anderson

so whats the plan princey

Roman Kinglton

We got to pick from three options

Oh wait

You know there’s a dinner thing at the beginning right

Like you show up then you eat then you dance or whatever then ditch

Anyway, table options are 2, 5, or 10

Obv 2 sucks and 5 is a dumb number

Like it would work if it was just you, me, Janus, Natalie, and Remus

But like I feel like that is unfair to you and Natalie

So we went with 10

V Anderson

so that means we need two more couples + one more floater

Roman Kinglton

You don’t capitlize but you go all the way to the symbols thingy for the plus sign?

V Anderson

capitalize  

Roman Kinglton

Shut up you don’t get to correct my spelling

Anyway

Yeah

Two more couples and one floater

We talked to some people already

We invited Toby and Remy

Obviously

Oh I came out to Toby btw

I think I forgot to tell you that

But that happened forever ago

V Anderson

o

u didnt tell me but i kinda assumed

i thought about coming out to remy

but i always choked up

Roman Kinglton

No pressure if you're not ready

Idk if I was ready to come out to Toby

It kinda just happened

V Anderson

i feel like im waiting for the right opportunity

but like idk if there will ever be one

and like if there is

it would be unexpected

and i feel like id chicken out

bc anxiety

but also not

its not always anxiety

sometimes it just b me

roman

u there

didnt mean to get all bummy

Roman Kinglton

Sorry I didn’t mean to disappear

I was trying to find that picture of that dog with that expression that’s like

:/

But better

But idk what it’s called

His expression captures my everything tho

But like you don’t need to come out to them if you don’t want to

V Anderson

forget it

who else r we going with

Roman Kinglton

Oh right

So Remy asked if Logan and Patricia could go

And we said yeah

Cuz like they’re your friends too

And like Remy’s friends

And Logan’s brother broke his leg so he can’t go

So we’re letting his gf tag along

Harley

I’ve never met her but I’m sure she’s great and all

That way Remus doesn’t feel like a ninth (?) wheel

Like obv they’re not going together but like

Nvmd you get it

V Anderson

that seems like a lot

Roman Kinglton

We can ditch them if you want

Just get a two person table

V Anderson

nah 

too romo

its fine

people r part of the experience

unless u want to 

bc janus

Roman nearly dropped his phone. He felt his stomach clench and his face grow hot for a moment. What did Virgil know? How did he know? He’d been so careful.

Roman Kinglton to V Anderson

Today 8:59 PM

Roman Kinglton

Whaaaaat

Why wouldn’t I want to hang out with Janus

He’s my best friend

Other than Remus

But like I’m stuck with him so it doesn’t count

V Anderson

its hella obvious you got a crush princey

like not to cishet society

but like 

gay eyes

Roman Kinglton

Those words don’t mean what you think they eman

*mean

V Anderson

gay eyes?

i thought it was like gaydar

but different

Roman Kinglton

It’s not that

V Anderson

urban dictionary here i come

Roman Kinglton

Don’t go on urban dictionary

It’s like when gay guys flirt with their eyes

V Anderson

thats not what urban dictionary says

hold on ill copy paste

A description for the extremely open, sparkly, slightly vacant eyes that some gay men possess.

Lance Bass, Chris Kattan as Corky Romano, and Mario Cantone are a few examples of men with gay eyes.

Roman Kinglton

Homophobia

V Anderson

the dude who posted it says he is gay not a homophobe

Roman Kinglton

That doesn’t mean anything

V Anderson

hush

anyway

u r avoiding the question

Roman Kinglton

Fine

I may or may not have a tiny thing for Janus

But like it’s not my fault!

He’s pretty

U have no idea how pretty he is V

V Anderson

ace not blind

ik how hot he is princey

Roman Kinglton

Woah

No need to throw the h word around

V Anderson

he plays lax 

and does mun

hes sport and big brain

r u saying he isnt hot

Roman Kinglton

Oh no he definitely is

Like

Wait actually you probably don’t want to hear about that

V Anderson

no tell me

Roman Kinglton

I have homoerotic thoughts when he eats certain foods

V Anderson

ew

u r rite i dont want to hear about that

nvmd 

yes i do

tell me more

Roman Kinglton

There is no more

Remus always steals his food and it’s gross

Total mood killer

V Anderson

i laughed so hard i snorted

oh now my sister is making fun of me :(

Roman Kinglton

You’re texting in front of your family???

V Anderson

dont worry

theyre watching a movie

im just here

on the couch

actually im on the floor bc i like it here

Roman Kinglton

Mood

Anyway

Me and Janus aren’t happening

V Anderson

y

Roman Kinglton

he’s straight

V Anderson

u dont know that

Roman Kinglton

Yes I do

I have to listen to im

Talk about natalie

Like all the time

Pretend i spelled things ight

*right

My typing b not so great rn

V Anderson

r u ok

i dindt mean to 

idk 

whatever i did

Roman Kinglton

No it’s fine

You were right

It is getting late tho

I think I’m going to turn in

Tomorrow’s Saturday

So we can go do actual prom prep stuff

V Anderson

ugh 

dont remind me

Roman Kinglton

>:D

Gn

V Anderson

gn

“Why are you going dress shopping with your girlfriend?”

“It’s the 21st century, man. It’s not that weird.”

“Aren’t you like not supposed to see her dress before the thing?”

“That’s for weddings, Remus. And shut up before Dad hears you. He already said that weird wedding bells thing when I told him about Danika.”

“Ha, loser.”

“Shut up. You’re just salty because you're single.”

Virgil didn’t look happy when Roman met him at the mall. Roman frowned at the sight of him. “You okay, man?”

Virgil shrugged, sticking his hands into the pocket of his hoodie. “It’s nothing.”

“No, tell me. If you’re not feeling good-”

“Dysphoria’s stressing me out. Dress shopping isn’t a super fun experience.”

“Oh.” Roman hadn’t really thought about that. He’d been kind of excited to go dress shopping. He supposed it made sense that Virgil wasn’t though. An idea stuck him. “Tell you what. When we get my suit, you can try it on if I can put on your dress. We’re the same size-ish, right? Take some private pics, just for us. Make the day worth it.”

Virgil’s face brightened immediately. “Really?”

Roman grinned. He hadn’t expected such a simple offer to pick up Virgil’s spirits so easily but whatever works. “Of course. I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it. And like we can try to find something modest if you want.”

Virgil somewhat made a face. “I don’t want to deal with… y’know, tits but I also don’t want to look like a prude. I’ve had a lot of people ask if I’m like… Christian. Which really sucks. And not just for, like… Identity erasure stuff.”

“Ace stuff?”

“Not what I was talking about but that too, I guess. Just a weird… thing. It’s hard to explain. Sorry.”

“No need to apologize. Wait, is it because it’s like a white people thing? You’re Asian, right? Would some kind of traditional… uh, garb be better?”

Virgil snorted as the pair started walking. “First of all, you’re edging on some racial shit you don’t want to get into. And second, a dress is a dress. It doesn’t matter if it’s a different kind. And third, I’m mixed race. I look hella white. I don’t want people thinking I’m some kind of religious prude but I’d rather them think I’m a prude than a weeb.”

Virgil counted on his fingers as they walked, cementing his point and Roman felt kind of bad. Virgil was… Well, his friend but he didn’t really understand anything about him. Roman was an allosexual, cisgender white man. He was the kind of guy someone thought of when they thought of the LGBT community. A stereotype, maybe, but rather simple to understand. Virgil was not. Diversity was hard to understand but intersectionality? That wasn’t really Roman’s strong suit. He’d try, obviously, but he was getting the feeling that he was in over his head.

“So where do you think we should go?”

“One of us is trans and the other is gay. That alone should tell you that only one of us has any idea what we’re doing here.”

“To Old Navy then!”

“Old Navy? Really? That’s where my mom buys my dad khakis.”

“They have other stuff too.”

“I’ll take your word for it.”

Roman Kinglton to V Anderson

Today 7:17 PM

Roman Kinglton

[VTux_RDress_pics.jpg]

Here are the pics

V Anderson

ty 

o these look good

Roman Kinglton

they do

the purple is growing on me

V Anderson

if i cant show my trans pride gotta show my ace pride lol

Roman Kinglton

Lol

The dinner was nice. Weirdly formal. That shouldn’t have been surprising but Roman had never really been to something like that. At least he was sitting next to Remus so in comparison his lack of manners wasn’t that obvious. Besides, who gathered up a few hundred teenagers in one place and expected them to be perfectly mild mannered? The other tables were a hell of a lot crazier than Roman’s group.

The dancing part was a bit less formal than Roman expected after the dinner. They just blasted a bunch of pop songs. And some hip hop but Roman and Virgil’s first dance ended up being to Ed Sheeran so Roman wouldn’t call it an amazing experience or anything. It was fun and not particularly romantic which was pretty much all Roman could ask for.

The photos, of course, were the focus though. Neither Roman nor Virgil really understood the hype, their private session in each other’s’ clothes in a photo booth at the mall had been the main event for them, but Remy and Patricia seemed to be having fun sticking them in different poses and Roman supposed looking back it would be nice to have these pictures with his friends.

Prom itself wasn’t what everyone was here for though. The school’s rental window of the venue expired at eleven. Too early to be considered a real party. No, the real banger was afterward.

The group split up. Logan and Particia weren’t really the partying type. Remy and Toby ran off to go make out or something, Roman wasn’t really sure and he didn’t want to know. Harley went off with her own friends. That left Virgil, Natalie, Janus, Remus, and Roman to search for house parties on their own. Roman was happy with that. Sure, it might’ve been nice to have Toby hang around and Virgil probably would have liked it if his friends were there but Roman’s core group was there and that’s what mattered. Even if he was kind of jealous of the way Janus held Natalie’s hand as the group walked down the street.

“We should’ve rented a car,” Remus complained after a while. They hadn’t walked too far but the school’s venue was out of sight so it wasn’t totally unreasonable for him to be whining already. “Like half the kids at our school rented limos.”

“None of us have jobs, Remus,” Natalie pointed out, glancing over her shoulder at the boy trailing behind them.

“We paid for prom tickets. We can afford an uber.”

“Chill. It’s not far,” Janus chided, sounding faintly amused.

“Where are we going anyway?” Virgil spoke up. Roman was glad he wasn’t wearing heels. He didn’t really want to give his fake girlfriend a piggyback ride in this stiff suit. He should’ve brought a change of clothes. “And how did you hear about this place?”

“Emilia’s parents are out of town,” Janus explained. “Her brother’s throwing a party.”

“And we were invited?” Roman asked skeptically, shooting his brother a look.

Remus put his hands up defensively. “Hey, we broke up on good terms. Heck, it wasn’t even really a break up. We went to one dance together and it didn’t work out. And she’s not even going to be there. It’s fine.”

“You’re really going to have to tell me that story sometime,” Natalie sighed with a shake of her head. “I can’t believe you scored a girl like Emilia. And remained friends after you broke up.”

Remus smirked and did that annoying thing where he wiggled his eyebrows. “In your dreams, sister.”

“Roman?”

“I have no idea,” Roman admitted. He’d been trying to pry it out of Remus for months. He had no clue how it happened but Remus was a strange one. Roman had complete faith he could get away with absolutely anything with evidence and no explanation. 

“We’re here,” Janus announced suddenly and Roman didn’t know how he missed it. The music was blasting and there were already teenagers loitering around the front of the house. A few he recognized from school, the ones who could afford cars no doubt, but there were a few kids he didn’t recognize. All his age, thankfully. He didn’t want to be a downer but he definitely would have gotten the hell out of there if there were adults here. These guys were probably just from another school. It wasn’t that unusual to have crossover events around prom.

“Don’t call them crossover events,” Virgil muttered and Roman’s back stiffened. Had he said that out loud? That was embarrassing but it looked like Virgil was the only one who heard him. That was better than someone else but there was laughter behind his eyes and Roman doubted he’d let it go.

The others were already making their way inside. Remus made a beeline for the snacks the second he stepped through the door while Janus and Natalie drifted off to talk to someone Roman assumed was the host. Both Natalie and Janus were the social, easygoing type. It made sense they’d want to talk some people up. That’s what made them good together. Roman just wasn’t sure what he and Virgil were supposed to do. There wasn’t really anything for them to do here.

Someone got off the couch and Virgil dragged Roman over in a heartbeat, claiming the seat before anyone else could. It was a bit cramped and Roman was practically sitting on Virgil’s lap, which wasn't exactly the most straight passing thing they could do but Roman didn’t mind. Some others were dancing but his feet were still kind of tired from earlier. Still, he wasn’t really sure what Virgil was thinking. “We’re not making out in front of all these people, V.”

Virgil scoffed. “What kind of allo do you take me for? Nah, I got the script for the end of the year play on my phone. I know you haven’t seen it. Figured we could read it and pretend we’re looking at porn.”

“...”

“Is that not something allos do?”

“Not in public!”

“Does that mean you don’t want to look at the script?”

“Shut up, of course I do.”

Virgil smirked and pulled his phone out of god knows where. He already had the pdf downloaded and it wasn’t hard to pull up and they didn’t need to ask for the wi-fi or anything. That was good. Roman didn’t really want to lose their seat. He was sure Virgil didn’t appreciate his ass bones digging into his thighs but Roman for one was comfortable.

The music was still pretty loud but Roman was able to tune it out and get invested in the script. It was something one of the graduating seniors put together. Or probably more than one. This was a pretty well-written play, Roman imagined more than one person had worked on this. But it was good. Romantic, character-driven, exciting. He would have thrown in some fantasy elements in there. Magic and supernatural elements always made these stories better, in his opinion, but he supposed the realism effect added a layer to it.

He’d been reading for about an hour when he felt something cold on the back of his neck.

Roman yelped as Remus started crackling. Roman shot a glare at his brother as he popped up from behind the couch. “Remus! What the hell was that?”

“Beer!” Remus informed him cheerfully, holding up an empty bottle, and Roman’s eyes widened in alarm. Virgil grabbed his chin and titled it downward, angling his gaze at the six untouched cups in Remus’s other hand filled with faded brown liquid. Roman visibly relaxed as Remus laughed. “Chill. I just got one of, like, ten sealed beers in this whole house. And I know you wouldn’t want me chugging this shit so I dilute the hell out of it and ended up filling a bunch of cups so here. Enjoy.”

There were suddenly three cups in one of Roman’s hands. He made an unearthly noise of surprise and scrambled to stop himself from dropping any of them. Virgil grabbed one easily but Roman still felt awkward sitting on Virgil’s lap holding the other two. At this point, he was practically straddling him with his arms in the air. “Remus!”

“I’m going to go find Janus! Byyyye!”

“Wait! Take one of your cups! We don’t need three, you r- Oh he’s gone already.”

Virgil turned to the guy sitting on the couch next to him and held up his cup like an offering. “You want this? Promise I didn’t fuck with it.”

“Thanks, man,” the guy responded. He plucked the cup out of Virgil’s hand and started chugging it, which Roman found kind of alarming but Virgil didn’t seem to notice or care. Roman was ninety percent sure he’d mentally blacked out when he got called a man. Probably just a habit of this guy, he seemed like the type, but Roman was sure Virgil knew that and if he didn’t, he wasn’t about to pop his euphoria bubble.

“So,” Roman coughed, drawing Virgil’s attention. “Beer?”

“Should we?”

“I mean, Remus said he got it from a sealed bottle. And he diluted it. With water, probably.”

“Probably?”

“I mean, it’s Remus. The best we can hope for is tap.”

“And you want to try it to find out?”

“I mean, it’d be a waste not to try it, right? And it’s not like we’re going to have another chance to drink for another, like, five years.”

“Is this the last party you plan on going to before you’re twenty-one?”

“Are we going to drink it or not?”

“Cheers,” Virgil responded, taking a cup from Roman and clicking it with his. It was a red solo, of course, so it wasn’t all that satisfactory but the familiar material felt nice in Roman’s hand as he tipped it back and poured the contents into his mouth.

...And immediately spat them out.

“Oh god,” Roman choked as he turned his head away. He was glad to have enough sense to turn his head away so at least he didn’t spit on Virgil but the carpet had just gotten a mouthful of brown liquid that definitely was not coming out anytime soon. He kind of felt bad but the house was half-trashed anyway so he doubted one stain would make much of a difference. If this guy was throwing a party like this while his parents were out of town, he could probably afford a cleaner before they got back.

Virgil, being trapped under Roman, just spat back into the cup. He passed it off to the guy next to him who started drinking it without question, oblivious to the stark disgust on Virgil’s face. “That definitely wasn’t water.”

“I think mine was sprite,” Roman told him, wiping his mouth. Taking a page from Virgil’s book, he passed his cup to the guy next to them. Probably not the wisest idea to give him a third cup but it was pretty washed down and it was just beer. Beer had a low alcohol count, right? Or whatever the unit for counting… whatever it was alcoholic beverages had. Roman didn’t drink, he had no idea how it worked. But half a beer mixed with sprite probably wouldn’t get this guy drunk or anything.

“Mine was definitely lemonade.” Virgil ran his tongue over the back of his wrist like a cat, trying to get the taste out. “Your brother is a psychopath.”

“I know.”

“I definitely got the worst of the two.”

“I know. Sorry not sorry.”

“Asshole.”

“You know you love me,” Roman responded and began flailing his hand for Virgil’s phone. He’d just gotten to a good part of the script and wanted to resume. Virgil grumbled and plopped his phone into his hand. Roman smirked and unlocked it. “Oh hey, you got a text. Group text. Natalie says she got an invite to another party if we want to tag along. She says this one is lame. Unless we’re enjoying it. Then it’s awesome. But if we want to leave we should piss then meet up with her outside in fifteen minutes or she’ll leave without us.”

“Does it really take fifteen minutes to piss?” Virgil grumbled and began shifting, nudging for Roman to get up. He did willingly but it took a bit longer than it should have. It wasn’t until he started moving that he realized his legs were falling asleep. He imagined Virgil’s weren’t much better.

“It does when you don’t know where the bathroom is and your legs aren’t cooperating.”

“Bathroom’s down the hall,” the guy on the couch told them, gesturing vaguely. “Thanks for the drinks.”

“You know I spit in mine, right?” Virgil asked, looking at him dubiously as he got up.

“Do I look like I care?”

“Fair point. Thanks for the directions.”

Roman smiled and saluted the guy before clumsily ambling after Virgil down the hall. He was sure that he looked drunk as hell right now but it felt awful walking on tingly feet, alright? Not his fault being drunk and having asleep legs looked the same to the untrained teenage eye. And alcohol was gross. Remus had ruined it for him. He was never drinking that stuff again.

Virgil seemed to share his sentiment. “I don’t care if this isn’t my house. If there’s toothpaste in there, I’m rinsing the hell out of my mouth.”

“Same here,” Roman agreed as he pushed the door of the bathroom open. And immediately froze, breath catching in his chest.

“Roman?” Virgil asked, confused by his sudden stop. He shifted his weight onto his toes to peer over Roman’s shoulder. “Oh shit.”

This wasn’t the bathroom. It was the closet. The closet where Remus and Janus were making out.

Roman took a step back, shocked. His back hit the wall, making a noise. Janus and Remus looked up suddenly, panic in their eyes. And that panic grew even more upon the sight of their friends.

They were fully clothed so at least there was that but it was still a rather scandalous position. They were holding each other, and not in a particularly compromising way. Emotional, not sexual. Like they’d done this before. Like they were used to it. How had Roman missed that? His brother and his crush?

Roman had no idea what expression he had on his face but he bet it wasn’t a good one. Janus opened his mouth to explain but Roman couldn’t hear him. His ears filtered out any noise around him and his world vanished.

Roman was pretty sure he whited out because the next thing he knew, he was outside. Standing, so at least he hadn’t fainted or anything, but he was still unsure how he’d gotten there. Virgil’s arm was around his, guiding him as he stumbled out. In the back of his mind, Roman knew he looked awful but he couldn’t bring himself to care.

He was pretty sure he was in shock or something like that. He was no medical genius, he really didn’t know what shock was, but what he felt right now definitely felt like shock. His phone buzzed in his pocket, drawing him out of it, as he ambled outside. He felt the grass under his toes. Somehow he’d lost his shoes. How the hell had he lost his shoes? Correction, shoe. He still had one of them. But how did that even happen? That sounded dangerous. He was at a party in the middle of the night. There was probably glass on the ground. He was probably going to cut his foot. 

“You’re not going to cut your foot. And you threw your shoe at Remus. He’ll probably bring it home if you miss it,” Virgil grumbled into his ear. Roman blinked. Had he said that out loud? Gosh, he’d been doing that a lot lately. Did he ramble like this all the time? He had to work on that.

“Sorry,” Roman whispered. His back straightened as he regained control of his body.

Virgil waved him off as he let go of him. “Don’t be. It’s not every day you see your brother and your crush making out in a closet. While you’re in the closet. And they’re in the closet too, I guess. Figuratively and literally.”

Roman groaned and leaned his head back.

“Sorry.”

“It’s fine. It happened. Can’t deny it. Let’s just get out of here.”

“I see Natalie up ahead. Let’s just tell her we’re leaving so she doesn’t think we got roofied or kidnapped or something.”

“Good idea,” Roman responded and felt his stomach twist. Poor Natalie. It was one thing for Roman to see his brother kissing Janus but Natalie was his girlfriend. And it seemed like she really liked him. Roman didn’t really want to be the one to tell her that her boyfriend was cheating on him or that he was actually gay. Fuck, Janus was gay. Normally Roman would be rejoicing but now it just made him feel worse. He wouldn’t have to tell Natalie, would he? That felt like outing. No, that was definitely outing. Roman didn’t want to do that, even if Janus had pulled a shit move.

However, it seemed Janus was not what Natalie had on her mind as the pair approached.

She had an odd expression on her face. Unreadable yet telling at the same time. She looked up as the two approached. Roman wondered if she somehow knew. “What’s the matter, Natalie?”

Natalie said nothing. She held up her phone, revealing a number of pictures Roman thought he had hidden deeply and safely, away from the world’s prying eyes.

It was the pictures he and Virgil had taken the day they’d gone to the mall. The pictures where they’d swapped clothes. The ones of him in Virgil’s beautiful purple dress. The ones of Virgil in Roman’s clean tux. The ones where Virgil’s long hair was tied up under a beanie. The ones where Virgil looked genuinely happy for the first time in his life. The ones where Virgil looked like a man. The ones that had more than enough evidence that neither of them were exactly epitome of… Fuck. 

Roman’s stomach dropped for what felt like the second time tonight. This was so much worse than seeing Janus kissing Remus. Oh, this was so, so much worse. He glanced over at Virgil but his friend was already making a run for it.

And Roman ran after him without a moment of hesitance.

The concrete was shredding up his bare foot but Roman didn’t care. He did care where his sock went because he doubted he threw that at Remus and that was just plain confusing but Roman tried not to think about it. Virgil was his priority right now. And not because he probably knew where his sock was.

Roman was a football player but Virgil was surprisingly fast. Probably because he had both shoes. And, y’know, anxiety. Fight or flight and all that. He probably felt like shit right now. Roman couldn’t even begin to imagine what Virgil was feeling right now. Being outed was awful but Roman couldn’t imagine what it was like to be outed as trans. He knew feeling like shit wasn’t a contest but deep down Roman knew that Virgil’s identity as a trans man was incomparable to Roman’s identity as a gay man.

It felt more… private. And personal. And so much more violating that someone would rip that out of him and show the world without his consent. He knew it wasn’t a contest and he shouldn’t really be comparing the two but his heart hurt for Virgil more than it did for himself.

Roman tried to look at his phone as he ran, trying to find an answer to the countless questions rushing through his mind. He’d been a part of that group blast as well. It took awhile to scroll back to the beginning thanks to the long stream of comments and reactions but he managed to find the original post. It was from Anton, unsurprisingly. How the hell had he gotten them? Roman knew for sure that he and Virgil hadn’t developed any physical copies. Everything was digital and well hidden enough that there was no way Anton could have gotten his hands on them.

It was hard to read while running but Roman managed to figure it out. Apparently Anton’s cousin manned the photobooths at the mall. There wasn’t a lot of detail in the text but Roman didn’t need it. He could imagine an older, meaner version of Anton sneering at his pictures. Slurs on his tongue, malice in his eyes- It wasn’t hard to picture. And if the guy was anything like Anton, he had no problem with sharing pictures meant to be private. Which meant the biggest bully at Roman’s school got his hands on Roman and Virgil’s most well-kept secrets.

For a moment, Roman still had hope. Hope that this was just meant to be an embarrassing picture to get back at them after what Virgil had done to Anton on Valentine’s Day. All the foul language and descriptive insults in the original message quickly discredited that possibility. For both of them. Mostly Virgil but there was still plenty of bashing directed towards Roman. The whole school would know. Maybe even more than the whole school. Word travelled fast among teenagers. Roman had no doubt his parents would catch wind of this sooner or later but he pushed that out of his mind for the moment.

Roman found Virgil sitting next to a street lamp, curled up with his legs pressed to his chest. He wasn’t crying which Roman was thankful for but also found worrying. He knew Virgil wasn’t much of a crier but Roman was definitely a crier. Something his dad made fun of him a lot for but Roman’s mom praised him for. It was a good way to let out pent up emotions. And Roman knew Virgil had a lot of emotions right now. It couldn’t be good to hole them up like this.

“Are you alright?” Roman asked as he sat down next to Virgil. He wasn’t out of breath but it felt like a weight had come crashing down over him, like an emotional and physical wave ready to drown him. Telling him to rest, telling him to escape the pain coming his way. 

Virgil shook his head. “What do you think?”

“Sorry. I don’t know what else to say. Other than I’m really sorry. If I hadn’t asked to take those pictures-”

Virgil’s head snapped up to look at him. Roman could see the redness in his eyes and the tears threatening to spill but none had fallen yet. “Roman, no. Don’t blame yourself. You’re as much of a victim of this as I am. This is all Anton’s fault.”

Some of the weight in Roman’s chest eased but everything still hurt. “I- You know what? I’m not going to argue. This is shit. Fuck this. I hate this.”

Virgil laughed a single, bitter, humorless note. “You get it.”

“I think I’m the only one in this shithole town who does,” Roman answered. His sharp tongue somewhat surprised him but the anger was bubbling up and he wasn’t ready to put a lid on it. Any fear or sorrow in him was pushed aside, replaced by hot rage and destructive thoughts. “We should- We should- I have no idea what we should do. All I can think about is Halloween for some reason. I think it would be kind of obvious it was us if we egged Anton’s house.”

“We’re not egging Anton’s fucking house.”

“Try to stop me.”

“We’re tarring it.”

“That’s the spirit. But I think that only works with people, not houses.”

“Still hard to clean.”

“So cute, you two plotting revenge,” a voice cooed. Roman jumped, his brief spout of anger melting back into surprise. He hadn’t heard a car approaching. He looked up and saw Remy hanging out a car window. Remy’s usual swagger faded and they shot the pair a sympathetic look. They held up their phone. “Find my friend. Comes in handy. Come on.”

“Where are we going?” Virgil asked, getting to his feet. His dress hadn’t gotten particularly dirty from sitting on the ground but Roman’s eyes still flickered to the edges. Good riddance, maybe. That thing was evil but they’d still spent decent money on it so part of Roman’s heart went out for it, even if it was the source of their current misery.

“Away from here,” a woman’s voice answered. Virgil and Roman’s eyes flickered to the driver’s seat of the car and froze. In it, sat Seth. Or, Anton’s girlfriend.

“I know what you’re thinking,” Toby spoke up, sticking his head out the passenger seat window, as Roman and Virgil prepared to run again. Or Roman was preparing to run at least. Virgil had gone for a particularly large stick on the ground. When it came to fight or flight, Roman was not ashamed to say Virgil was the fighter of the pair. “I promise we’re not fucking with you.”

“Yeah, Seth dumped Anton’s ass so fucking fast,” Remy cackled. Roman relaxed a bit. If he was in a better mood he may have laughed but right now he just wanted more answers before he trusted these guys.

It was a bit awkward to talk to the person in the driver’s seat from the street but Seth somehow made it effortless. “I promise I didn’t know he was a bully. I mean, my little brother’s gay and his partner is genderfluid. I’d be a shitty sister if I associated myself with jerks like him. Honestly, I’m kind of offended Toby didn’t tell me anything but we can talk about that later.”

“Looking forward to it,” Toby answered sarcastically. He slapped his palm against the side of the car and looked at them expectantly. “Well?”

Roman and Virgil slid into the back seat of the car without any more questioning. Roman knew logically he should have resisted more but he’d already made some bad decisions tonight and was having a shitty night regardless. He just wanted it to be over. “Where are we going?”

“Anderson out of that dress, for starters,” Remy responded smoothly. They threw themself in the seat opposite of Roman, letting Virgil sit in the middle. Seth pulled away from the curb, driving slow enough that she didn’t bother to tell anyone in the back to put on a seatbelt. “I got some spare clothes at Toby’s house that should fit you.”

Virgil smiled and relaxed against the seat. “Call me Virgil. He/ him.”

Remy smiled back. “Alright, Virgil. And you, Kinglton?”

“What? Oh, I’m cis. Roman, also he/ him,” Roman responded a bit awkwardly. He hadn’t been expecting that but it was still appreciated. “I- I am gay though.”

“And I’m aroace,” Virgil piped up before any assumptions could be made. “We’re not actually dating. We’ve been faking it from the start. Because… Y’know…”

“We live in an awful town for queer people?”

“Yeah. That.”

“Well, you’ve got some allies now,” Toby told him, turning around in his chair to look in the back. He looked tired but relieved. Why exactly, Roman wasn’t sure but he was grateful. Toby really was a good friend. Remy too. And he was sure Seth would be an invaluable help in the coming weeks.

Roman still felt heavy. He let himself sink into the seat, Virgil’s head on his shoulder. It still felt like some wave was trying to drown him, trying to fill his lungs with water and help him escape from this reality that just kept hurting him. But the pain was fading and Roman felt like he’d be able to keep his head up from now on. And if he couldn’t, his friends would be there for him.