Chapter Text
Just like he said to Simon a moment ago, he was ready to take up his future alone now. Through Felix’s question, he could figure out what was important to him. It gave him the energy and confidence to move, to decide.
He now was sure that he wanted to be with Benji, that all the things Felix had described would be with Benji. He was someone worth fighting for.
He couldn’t hide his smile as he saw Benji’s house, his thoughts all went to the upcoming conversation. The only thing his brain zeroed on was the door, the door to his future with Benji.
It was probably the reason why he didn’t hear the car as he tried to cross the street. He didn’t even feel anything, no, the only thing he registered was that he had fallen onto the street.
He couldn’t move his body. Not a second later a man comes out of the car screaming for help. It felt like an hour until someone moved in front of him, it was Benji.
He could see tears falling from his eyes like never before. Benji was crying as he talked to him, only now did Victor realize what happened.
He had gotten hid with a car, he slowly started to feel the blood running down his legs. His lungs hurt as he tried to breathe.
“Victor please, everything is going to be okay. Stay with me please” Benji whispered as he held his hand, Victor didn’t know if he would survive this, but he wanted to know Benji’s answer.
“I want to ask you something” Victor started before he coughed blood out.
“Hey, hey don’t talk, the ambulance will be here any moment.” Benji said.
“No, I must know. I came to here to fight for you, to fight for us” More blood came out as he spoke, but he couldn’t stop himself.
“I love you, Benji, more than anything else. There is no other person I could picture myself with in the future.” Victor said he couldn’t continue as his strength left him, but Benji understood him perfectly to his luck.
“I love you too, so don’t you dare to ….” Victor could hear more as his eyes closed.
He could feel how his consciousness was fading, though that wasn’t important. Benji said that he loved him too if he just had a second chance to make things better for them, for Benji, for Mia, for Pilar and Felix.
Victor woke up with a gasp as he clutched his chest in pain, or so he thought, except there was no pain, breathing was normal again.
Sitting up he looked around, but what he saw surprised him. It was his room, but all his stuff was packed. For a moment dread filled him as some kind of afterlife scenario went through his head.
It took him five minutes to get up and walk around the room, all the memories he made over the one and a half years were gone. The pictures with his friends, the sketch Benji had gifted him for his 16 birthday.
He gasped in shock as he felt the pain when his foot hit the corner of his bed. Stumbling a little he made his way to the window, it was still dark outside. Looking at his phone he could see that it was just 5 AM.
What shocked him the most was the day, it was his first day here, tomorrow would be school again. That couldn’t be, but what else is here to explain all this. The pain made it clear that this wasn’t a dream, but was it truly real?
His heart started to flutter, was this the second chance he had hoped for? Did his last wish come true?
He slowly made his way out of his room, everything was silent and for a second he thought that this was the place of the dead after all.
With his last hope, he peeked into his younger brother's room to see him sleeping peacefully, as his sister and parents.
Joy filled him as he got back into his room, this was real. He could make things better, he wouldn’t hurt Mia again as he did before. He could be himself from the beginning.
Being out of the closed had given him a lot of confidence, but it was nothing compared to the realization of what he wanted from his life. What gave him the most confidence was that he had gotten a second chance and he was going to live without regrets this time.
He knows that his parents would accept him being gay, his mother had a long rough way, but she did in the end. His father was more neutral, but he also didn’t push him away.
-Don’t hurt Mia again
-Help your younger brother and sister adjusting better
-Set my parents straight
-Get my job at Brasstown back
-Flirt with Benji, show him that there are other options than Derek
-Don’t pressure Benji
-Build a relationship with Simon again
-Help Felix with his rent when the time comes
That was the checklist he made on his phone.
A smile made his way up to his face, he couldn’t believe that he had the chance to correct so many of his mistakes.
With this newfound energy, he started to unpack all his stuff and organize them how they used to be. It didn’t take long since he already knows where they would be.
It was only 6 AM when he finished organizing his room, so he took a shower in his private bathroom. Yea, his room was connected to a small bathroom, originally Pilar wanted this room, but he played the big brother card and got it.
After finishing, he packed all his stuff for his first day of school tomorrow. He then started to install their router before Adrian could scream about how he couldn’t watch his unboxing videos. He couldn’t hide his smile as he thought about how well his brother has taken it that he was gay.
He tried to unpack and clean everything as quietly as possible. It was 7 AM when he stopped and started to make his magical pancakes, well almost magical. They still didn’t help his mom accept him faster.
It didn’t take long for Adrian and his Dad to smell breakfast and making their way to the kitchen.
“Dad” Victor greeted with a smile.
“Hey there buddy” He said as his younger brother tiptoed to look into the pan. He just smiled as he grabbed his brother and hosted him up to show him the almost finished pancakes.
“Wow, you already unpacked so many things.” His father called out from the living room.
“I woke up early.” Victor replied as he slapped Adrian’s hand away from the pan.
“You can get one when they are finished.” He said as he sat him down.
“Now set the table for me, okay?” Victor asked, his brother just nodded before dashed off to find their plates in all the boxes.
“Couldn’t you sleep well?” His father asked as he leaned against the counter. Victor thought about how to answer this, normally he would pretend to be fine for his family. He had always fixed every argument they had or repaired most of their stuff.
But he had changed over the last one and a half years. He now knows that he had to take care of himself because he was the child and they were his parents, not the other way around.
“I’m just trying to be strong for Pilar and Adrian, they both will have a hard time adjusting here and I want to be a stable pillar they can lean on. Moving across the country is scary, family is the only thing they can rely on.” Victor said thoughtfully.
Thought his father looked a little shocked, maybe because Victor never explained why he did all the fixing. He had always done that without explaining, so it was just natural for them to assume that he did it without thinking.
“Victor I didn’t know….” His father started but Victor interrupted him.
“Don’t, I didn’t say this gather pity, Papi, I just want you to know how I feel inside, okay?” He asked as his father nodded. He just patted his shoulder as he took the offered pancake.
“I’m proud of you Victor.” He said as he sat down by the dining table.
The morning went by just like it had in his past life. His mother wandering from where Jesus would want to watch over them and his sister saying ‘probably not nailed to a cross'. The tension was still thick.
His parents just made the barest minimum of small talk and Pilar ignored them most of the time. Adrian looked a little confused, but he tried to keep the conversation up about all kinds of unboxing videos he might have seen.
When they finished eating he cleaned everything up before he went to his siblings' rooms.
“Pilar, Adrian? Could you two give me a little bit of your time?” He asked, his brother looked a bit confused at his serious tone but hopped down from his bed to walk over to him.
“Can we come in?” He asked as he picked his brother up. His sister just nodded, probably equally confused like her brother.
Coming in he closed the door behind him as he set down beside Pilar, his brother in his lap. Taking a deep breath he chose his words carefully.
“I know that we are all scared of tomorrow, we are gonna be the new kids. The other students are going to stare at us but remember that you are not alone. I’m 100% sure that you two will find fine friends, but remember that even if you don’t, you will always have me, have our family.”
It was a good start as the two listened to him without interrupting, if he had to be honest he had thought that Pilar would scream at him.
“I know that we left family, friends and even boyfriends back in Texas and that this hurt you. Nevertheless, I expect you to be open to other people okay? Try to reach out and make new friends, because being mad at mom and dad will solve nothing”.
Pilar looked like she wanted to say something, but he signaled her that he wasn’t finished.
“That is what I expect, to be open, nothing more and nothing less. Now to the other part. It’s okay not to be fine. You have all the reasons to not be fine and I don’t expect that. Be scared, be mad, or be lonely, be what you want.
But know that I will be there for you, you can even sleep in my bed when you want okay? Just know that with whatever trouble you have, I will always be there for you, nonjudgmental.” The last part was directed to his sister, but he didn’t know if she had taken it well.
He gave them both a long hug before he pealed himself off, crouching down to see Adrian face to face. The small boy was crying, well tears were running down his face, but he didn’t let a tone out.
He just patted his head as he stood up and looked at his sister, she was fine on the outside, but he could tell that she was glad for his words. That he had taken a bit of her fear, well he was glad that he could help.
Smiling he made his way to the door but stopped as he turned to them.
“Ah, before I forget it. Tomorrow is the Winter Carnival and we three will be going as siblings, if you find friends then invite them along but you will not escape my clutches for that.” He called out darted to his room before one of them could deny his request.
Letting himself fall off onto his bed he couldn’t help the small tear that escaped him. It was a mixture of exhaustion and happiness. He had made his first step into a better future, he was going to be a responsible older brother.
Love, Victor.