Chapter Text
Everything was boiling. Technoblade couldn't pinpoint where exactly it had originated, but the shards of glass sticking out of his side were a good start...
The ominous glow of the Nether portal was closer now, thank gods, but he could still see his vision blurring at the edges. He promised Philza he'd be in and out, five minutes tops. Now it was steadily climbing into the fifteen-minute mark, the man would be flying out of the portal any minute now.
'Awww, poor little piggy needs his birdie to carry him home?' The voices cooed, making Techno growl aloud. Usually, he was better about watching his temper with the voices, but he was in too much pain to filter himself.
That was when it hit him the hardest, the pain flaring up in spots it hadn't been before, namely his legs. He growled and collapsed to the ground below. Eyes properly shivering now as the portal was mere feet away at this point.
Just a little closer... He was so close... On hands and knees, he crawled towards the portal, even as his body screamed at him and the voices mocked him...
Finally, he collapsed onto the edge of the obsidian structure, dragging himself up and into the waves of vibrant magic. Then, the pain ceased. As soon as it had come, it was gone, leaving Techno exhausted and huffing for air.
Thankfully, that air was now the fresh air of the overworld, continuing to crawl out of the portal and onto the snowy ground. Though upon a slow look down at his hands, he discovered they were no longer there. Replaced instead by hooves that looked in as bad of shape as his fingernails did... What was happening?
"There you are Techno, I was-" The familiar voice of Philza was promptly followed by a short but loud yelp. Techno whirled his head in the direction of his friend and sighed. The man looked shocked to see him... was it the hooves?
"Phil, it's alright, I'm-"
"Fucking- I've never seen anything this big come through the portal before..." Philza muttered with a wide-eyed stare at Techno, causing him to give a snort of annoyance.
"Real funny. Can you help me figure out what's-"
"Are you friendly?" Techno blinked hard at his friend and approached, still crawling at this point.
"What are you insinuating? Do I look that bad?"
"Easy- easy!" Phil stammered, holding both his hands out with wide eyes and a frown. "Jesus... What... are you? A.. Hoglin? I didn't think our portal was that close to any... and you're not... turning.." He squinted and held a cautious hand out.
"Phil. What on earth are you.." He trailed off as he caught sight of himself in the reflection of Philza's eyes... Was that himself? He moved in closer, pressing his nose- snout?- into Philza's hand in the process. That... couldn't be him... What had happened? Where was his body and-- "My stuff!" He shouted, startling Phil enough to rip his hand away and scuttle back.
"Easy! Hey! Hey, I'll get you back home just... Gotta figure out how... Uhm.."
"He can't hear me. He can't hear a word. What the fuck happened. Why am I a--" He couldn't even say it, it was borderline embarrassing. Then he was being shoved. Blinking hard down at Philza as the man had- rather bravely, grabbed both of his tusks, now elongated and sharp, and was pushing. It didn't hurt per se, but it was ridiculously uncomfortable.
His eyes squinting as he obeyed the movement, maybe Phil had the right idea... If he just went back through the portal he'd turn back... Right? Backing up until his hooves- (that will never not be weird)- were up and over the obsidian once again and back onto the ground of the Nether.
But this time he wasn't alone... and this time he was still a Hoglin. He snarled, the sound reaching Philza as he perked up and looked around. "What? You're back home, aren't cha? Be a little grateful." He huffed and rose a brow at the Hoglin, taking a step forward before jerking at an odd clattering at his feet.
Looking down both of them saw a diamond sword, glistening with a previous enchantment that Techno had gotten...
But Philza didn't see that. Instead, he saw the pile of objects his friend carried around- Everywhere. "W.. what?" He stammered, slumping down and scrambling through the pile. "No. No-no-no." Jerking his head up he began looking around his eyes wide and.. confused. "Techno?? Where--" Jerking suddenly, his head snapped to stare at the Hoglin before him. Techno merely arched an eye ridge.
"Come on now Phil. You know I'm not that stupid.."
"No... He... No, he's smarter than that. A Hoglin wouldn't have killed him." He sighed deeply and reached to rub his face, looking exhausted and scared. "But.. if so... what... happened?"
"If I could tell you I would... But as it is you can't hear a word I say.."
"An ambush maybe?" Philza continued to wonder aloud as he made quick but quiet work of gathering his friend's items. "I knew I should have followed him..." Philza gave a grumble, causing the Hoglin to squint.
"Didja now?" He snorted, causing Philza to turn to him.
"You have something to say, Hoglin?" He asked in an accusatory voice, Techno merely snorted again. "Well have fun with that." He scoffed as he finished picking up the last of Technoblade's items. Techno rose a brow ridge as Phil tried to step back into the portal, walking after him with a huff. If he was stuck like this it had to be whatever was in that potion... His next best option was to stay by Philza's side until something changed.
Said man stopped short of the portal and turned to stare at the Hoglin nearly hovering over him. "... what?" He puffed as he made eye contact with the Hoglin.
"You can't understand me. So..." He craned his neck outwards towards Phil's neckline, causing the man to smile with a nervous laugh.
"H-hey-" He clamped down onto the shirt and began to drag him immediately, causing another squawk from the blonde. "Hey!" He fumbled and scrambled for any kind of purchase as he was slowly dragged away from the portal by the Hoglin.
Techno highly doubted they'd find what they needed in the overworld. Besides.. it felt safer to be here in the Nether.
Though Philza didn't think the same evidently... "What are you-- what do you want??" He asked with increasing confused fear. Once they were far enough from the portal, Techno dropped the flailing bird to stare at him. Trying to somehow get the point across.
"I got you back home, what more could you want?" Phil grumbled as he readjusted his hat.
"If I could tell you I would..." He repeated with an irritated grunt before staring down at his hooves. Maybe he could spell it out? Beginning to dig into the dirt, he scowled and tried to make sense of words.
"... Wait.." Philza muttered as Techno continued to write gibberish into the dirt around them. "Did you... see what happened?" Techno paused and lifted his head to stare at Philza. "Oh my God. You're trying to get me to follow you. So I can find Techno..." Well... it was close enough. Techno gave a nod making Philza scoff in slight excitement. "That's-- Okay okay. That's good, that's... fantastic actually." He sighed and pushed himself to a stand. "Well, what're we waiting for?"
"You..." Techno wanted to deadpan as he watched Philza walk off in a random direction... This was going to be a very long goose chase...