Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Harry, d’ya think you could help me with this one?”

“Just a moment,” Harry called back, looking over at Neville over his shoulder from where he was watching some third years practice the same spell, shirt untucked and tie loosened. “Bugger, Neville, you seem to be getting worse.”

****

It had started a few weeks ago, completely by accident, really. 

Neville had known he was gay for a very long time. Really for as long as he could remember, he’d had feelings for the men in his life. For all of second and third year, Harry Potter had been the center of those feelings. He’d had a terrible case of school girl crush and it was all Harry’s fault. But he’d gotten over it, no longer turning bright red whenever Harry looked at him or talked to him or really entered his vicinity at all. And he certainly stopped offering him an endless supply of chocolate and quills and parchment. 

He’d gotten over it. Forcibly, but he had. He had. It didn’t serve him any purpose to pine over any boy let alone The Boy Who Lived. Then Harry had to go and ruin everything again. 

During a Dumbledore’s Army meeting, they were practicing Flipendo Maxima. It was a more powerful version of the basic first-year spell Flipendo. Neville had struggled then, but his magic had improved over time. It was failing him at that moment though as he desperately tried to summon enough power to cast the spell. He couldn’t get even the smallest first year to fly back more than a foot while Ginny, Hermione, Ron, and nearly everyone else were achieving at least 10. He’d been ready to give up and storm out, brows furrowed deeply and lips tucked into an angry frown. But a voice appeared behind his shoulder. 

“It’s alright,” Harry said softly from behind him. “You’re doing just fine really. Just tighten up those movements and leave off the flick at the end.”

“ Flipendo Maxima ,” Neville shouted, doing as told as he cast the spell at Colin Creevey. He made it a bit further that time, but not far enough. Neville’s shoulders wilted in defeat. “It’s useless. I’m useless.”

“None of that,” Harry disagreed, voice still kind. “One more try. Here let me see first.” Neville lifted his head, melancholic as he waited for wait he saw as another fruitless attempt at help. Harry gave him a smile and Neville ignored the little lump in his throat, passing it off as worry that he would fail again. It was impossible to ignore the flutter in his chest when Harry touched his hand though, lifting his arm into the air. Countless cornish pixies exploded in his stomach and he instantly felt a million times sweatier, face flushing deeply. 

“Oh-”

“Just move exactly like this.” Harry’s hand was wrapped around his, walking him through the motions. “You’re so close, I swear.” Neville swallowed, holding his breath desperately as he watched Harry, trying to stay composed. “You just need to believe in yourself,” Harry said, looking up at Neville and meeting his gaze with a steady and kind look. Neville just nodded helplessly.

Harry let go and Neville felt at a loss, hand still warm from Harry’s gentle but firm touch. This was very bad. He shut his eyes for a second, yelling at his brain and the stupid pixies in his stomach to shut it so he could cast the spell and go deal with this horrible realization in peace. “ Flipendo Maxima! ” He heard the spell whip through the air, a yelp, a crash to the ground, and silence. He opened one eye timidly and saw Colin all the way across the room, easily 30 feet away, looking rather dizzy. 

“See,” Harry said proudly with a grin just as delighted, clapping Neville on the back, and quickly he felt as dizzy as Colin looked. 

From there it has spiraled. He couldn’t stop thinking about Harry. And in the next Dumbledore’s Army lesson, he found himself pretending like he had no idea how to cast the newest spell so that Harry would just touch him again, even if it was for a second. He felt like an idiot who had gone back in time, but every time he stepped into the room of requirement he just seemed to lose control of his own body. 

****

“I could’ve sworn you just got this one,” Harry sighed, slipping fingers through perpetually tousled hair. Neville felt his mouth water. He really wanted to touch it himself. 

“What? No. I didn’t. Can you show me again please?” Neville asked sweetly, feeling his eyelashes flutter in a move he hadn’t meant to make but proceeded to anyway. 

Harry looked fairly uncertain, but he didn’t question any further. “Uh, sure.” Neville thanked his lucky stars constantly that Harry was probably the most oblivious student in their year. For the savior of the wizarding world, he sure could be very naive and utterly clueless. 

Recovering from his confusion, Harry gained a mischievous look in his eyes. “Watch this,” Harry grinned and promptly demonstrated the spell by casting it on Ron who was across the room. 

Neville wasn’t watching as Ron’s legs locked together, causing him to tip forwards helplessly. He was too busy staring at the side of Harry’s handsome smiling face. In a different world, there was a Neville brave enough to grab him right then and there to plant a kiss on him, but this wasn’t that world and he wasn’t that Neville. Harry looked back at him and Neville’s face instantly turned scarlet as he was caught staring. 

“Is there something on my face?” Harry reached up self consciously, wiping at his cheek. 

Neville shook his head urgently. “No, sorry, drifted off. You know me,” Neville laughed at himself.

“Right.” Harry’s eyebrows were furrowed as he stared at Neville. 

“Walk me through it?”

“Of course.” Harry moved in close until their bodies were brushing. Neville’s heart started beating faster than an owl’s wings and he lifted his wand so that Harry could grab it. In the corner of his eye, there was a flash of Weasley orange hair. Ginny was staring at him, a knowing smirk in those blue eyes. As if his heart hadn’t already been racing, it started pounding even faster as she gave him a little wink, mouthing ‘Nice one’. 

Merlin’s beard, he was fucking screwed.