Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

And when broken bodies are washed ashore,

Who am I to ask for more, more, more?

Regulus coughed and spluttered as he woke up. It didn’t feel like waking up from a dream, more a nightmare. One that he had continued to relive over and over and over and had finally escaped. Except it wasn’t a nightmare, he realized, it was real.

What could’ve been no more than a few moments ago now seems as though it is the most distant memory.

Where was he? What had happened before? How did he...survive?

As the fuzziness of Regulus’ memory began to fade away, tears formed from his closed eyes.

The cave…the Horcrux. He finally had the Horcrux. He was about to destroy it but-

As Regulus remembers what happened next, he feels increasingly sickened.

The feeling of an almost human hand clawing and grasping at his feet. More and more of the vile creatures continued to appear out of the water. Fumbling for his wand as one grasps his ankle and yanks him off his feet, towards the water. Clawing deep into his calves and ankles, latching on, scraping away any hope of his escape. They dragged him further and further off the small island and into the icy water, latching onto his arms, shoulders, neck, stomach, anything they could reach. Dragging him down, down, down. Ripping him apart as he screams in pain though no one will hear. As though he had never really existed at all.

Regulus Black died alone, perhaps a fitting end to a lonely life.

Chapter Text

Regulus awoke screaming and spluttering. Holding his aching bones and body.

Awoke isn’t the right word.

Regulus came to life, he was reborn. Not very gracefully, might I add.

He was still shaking and fighting off the creatures that were no longer there.

His hair was soaked, as was his torn clothing, and his arms, legs and torso could be seen beneath the ripped fabric covered in scratches.

Then he finally opened his eyes and immediately grew still.

Regulus glanced around frantically until his eyes landed on me.

“Hello Regulus. I have been waiting to meet you.” I say calmly. Trying and failing to soothe his frantic state.

He opens his mouth, attempting to summon words that do not come, because what is there to possibly say?

“Are you alright?” I try again, my expression unchanging.

Regulus breaths deeply, attempting to collect his thoughts in order to properly form the words and questions he so desperately needs to ask.

“I…who…what…where am I?!” Regulus stutters, still struggling to grasp the words, clutching his throat as though he wanted to tear it out.

“You are exactly where you are meant to be. Here.” I reply.

“What does that mean? I- who are you?” He says more clearly.

“I am me, myself.”

“That doesn’t…that doesn’t mean anything.”

“It is the most meaningful thing in the universe.”

“But it- what is your name?”

“I do not have a name.”

“Why not?”

“Because it does not matter.”

“But I thought you said- “

“I know what I said. And it was true.” I interrupt.

“But it still doesn’t make any sense.” He counters.

“Of course it doesn’t make any sense, not to you anyway. Nothing about this makes any sense, not yet. Perhaps if you asked me more important questions instead of about myself, things may change.”

He stands up and brushes himself off, gazing over his torn clothing and inspecting his wounds.

Without giving him a chance to process I change the shredded robes into a simple pair of jeans and a red and gold knitted sweater.

Regulus’ head snapped up from his clothes to me, a look of shock crossed his face.

“Did you do that?” He snaps.

“Yes.” I answer truthfully.

“How did you…how did you know?” he asks suspiciously.

“I know everything about you, Regulus. Every decision you have ever made, all your feelings, all your thoughts, joy, sadness, anger, fear, pain, traumas, all of it. I know about everything you ever did during your time on earth, including your relationship with James Potter. Not that it was ridiculously hard for me to see.” Regulus blushes momentarily. “And everything you have done or has happened has led you to this very moment.”

Regulus seems to think about this for a moment, as if he is able to process every detail of information I have just handed to him.

“What about James? And…and Sirius?” he asks nervously.

“What about them?”

“Are they…safe?”

“Yes.”

Regulus becomes visibly calmer at the knowledge that the two people he cares for most are protected, for now.

“Where are they?” he asks.

“Both are in their homes at this moment.”

“Can I see them?” Regulus asks hopefully.

“No. Not right now no.” I reply.

Regulus’ face darkens as he makes the realization I was waiting for, the realization I wished would prevail but is necessary and unavoidable.

“I’m…I’m dead, aren’t I?”

“Yes.” I say solemnly.

“I died in the cave, in the water, they killed me.” Regulus states, stone faced.

“Yes.” I replied, although it was not a question. We both know he is simply stating the truth. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. You couldn’t have prevented it.” He eyes me. “Or could yo- “

“No, I can only observe. To interrupt would be to destroy everything.” I reply.

“Hmm…” Regulus hums softly. “So where exactly are we?”

“Good question. This is what is known as the waiting room.” I answer.

“The waiting…what?”

“Indeed, you may wait here until you are ready to leave.”

“Leave to go where?”

“I can’t tell you that yet.”

“Why not?”

“Because it is not time yet.”

“When will it be time?” Regulus asks impatiently.

“When you are ready.”

“When-“

“If you continue to ask me questions I cannot answer I see no point in my existence at all.” I interrupt sternly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Regulus scoffs.

“If you wish to spend the rest of your time here alone, I am happy to comply.”

Regulus’ face falls slightly.

“You…what?”

“Do you wish me gone?” I repeat.

“I…erm…I don’t…no, no please stay.” He says sheepishly.

I release a small smile. “Of course. Now do you have any further questions I can answer?”

Regulus pauses for a few minutes to think. I can sense the millions of questions flooding his mind and wait for the one I know will be chosen.

“Will I…will I ever see them again? James, Sirius, my school friends, my-“ his face faltered, “parents?”

“James? Yes. Sirius? Yes. Your friends? Yes. Your parents? No.”

Regulus looks relieved, not only at the fact that he will never have to see the dreadful people that call themselves his parents, but also that he will see those who matter again. However, after a few moments his face grows cold and solemn once again. He stares at the ground.

“Will I only see them again once their dead as well?”

“No. You may visit them from here.”

His head shoots up. “Really? Can I…can I see them now?”

“No, not right now.”

“Oh. Right, yes of course I can’t.” He looks back down at the ground. “Suppose there’s no point in asking when?”

“No, there isn’t. I’m sorry, Regulus.”

“Of course you are.”

The silence in the moments after is deafening.

“So, can you tell me more about this place?” Regulus asks. “It’s very…empty. Wait, is this like those muggle religions? Is this heaven? Or…hell?”

“No, not in the ways that matter. Although, they did get the part about the afterlife correct. But there is no heaven or hell. No good or bad place. How you acted during your time on earth had next to no consequences, at the very least once you left.”

Regulus bit his lip as he processed this.

“So, what you’re saying is…I had no impact, while I was alive.”

“No, that is not what I said at all. Your actions had an effect on others, yes, as well as the world around you. But here, those actions do not matter. Does that make sense?”

“No, not really.” Regulus sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “Does it stay like this? You know, all empty and white?”

I let out a small smile. “Tell me, Regulus, what is your favorite memory from during your time on earth?”

“I thought…I thought you said you knew everything about me?” Regulus questions.

 “I do. I’m asking you to tell me. I want to hear it from you.”

Regulus pauses to think for a moment. “That day…the day Kreacher took Sirius and I to the private beach near the family home, I think I was four and Sirius was five maybe? We spent hours playing in the water. Eventually when it became dark Kreacher had to chase us around to try and bring us home, but we didn’t care, we never wanted to go back-“

I snapped my fingers and the environment changed around us. The infinite white evaporated into a greyish beach scene. The floor turned to sand and the sound of crashing waves and seagulls squawking filled the salty air. Regulus looked around in surprise as the surroundings changed and were replaced with the memory.

“What is this-“ Regulus starts but grows silent as he sees the two young boys and grumpy house elf approaching the beach. The taller of the two boys is laughing and running towards the beach, his hair is jet black and falls just above his shoulders. The other is following with a huge grin on his face as he chases his older brother, the identical jet black curly hair flowing in the wind although it is cut much shorter.

“That’s-“

“Shhh!” I urge him to be quiet. “Just watch.”

Regulus nods and turns his head back to look at the brothers playing in front of them.

“Tag! You’re it!” one yells and runs away, as the smaller one squeals and chases after him.

The scene speeds up and suddenly the elf is chasing after the two shrieking children as they continue to run in and out of the water, evading their capture. Once it returns to normal, the children are gone, with the only evidence of them being the tiny footprints that covered the sand.

Regulus’ breath hitched and he swallowed harshly at the pain the memory brought back.

“I think that was the closest we ever were, Sirius and I.” Regulus chokes out, fighting back tears. “You shouldn’t’ve shown me that. I wish you hadn’t.”

“I know, but I also think you needed to see it.”

“Why?”

“Because I needed to show you what happiness looks like. I needed to prove to you that you experienced happiness at some point during your life, and that you’ll feel it again. Otherwise, your time here will be miserable and pointless.” I take a step closer to him. “That is what I’m trying to do here, I am making sure you leave here better than you left earth. I’m also preparing you for when the others arrive.”

Regulus looks up in alert. “Others? You mean…”

“When your loved ones die, they will come here as well. I promise you it won’t be easy, but I believe you will be okay.”

“What do you mean ‘be okay’? What will happen?”

“It’s not what you think, nothing physical will happen, but emotionally…because you have so much unfinished business it will be hard for you to make amends, its just so…complicated. But I know you, Regulus. You’re strong, perhaps not in the way many value, but it’s true. Even if you didn’t realize it, it’s there, your courage has always been there, but it is finally time for you to seek it out.

***

2 years later…

“Regulus?”

"What is it?"

“There's something I have to tell you.”

“Not now, I’m busy.” He said and continued to fiddle with the small device in his hand. Lots of things had changed about Regulus. For one, he had switched from wearing robes to muggle clothing, which consisted of a pair of dark blue jeans and a forest green sweater he had knitted for himself. His hair was also slightly longer, and he was less skinny than when he had first arrived. The bags that laid beneath his eyes no longer existed and he looks much healthier than he’s ever been.

“He’s asking for you.”

“Well tell him to piss- wait, who?” Regulus’ head shot up in surprise.

“I think it’s best if you come see for yourself.”

Chapter Text

I can wish all that I want,

but it won't bring us together

Plus, I know whatever happens to me,

I know it's for the better

“Regulus.”

“Evan.”

“You’re here.”

“So are you.”

Out of anyone it could’ve been, Evan might’ve been the last person Regulus thought he would see standing in front of him so soon. He’s tough, strong, he can look after himself. Although Regulus thinks, so was I.

“You- oh Evan I’m so sorry.” Regulus mutters solemnly.

“You’re…what? Regulus where am I?”

It takes Regulus a second to process what Evan means.

Fuck.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck.

Regulus looks around helplessly, but they are nowhere to be seen.

He can’t do this. How do they expect him to do this?

“Regulus? What are you looking for?”

“Where were you? What happened before you got here?”

“What?”

“Evan please just-“

“I…I was surrounded by aurors, then an older one with scars fired a curse at me. I didn’t hear what it was. It was just black, then…I was here. Regulus, is this where you’ve been all this time? Everyone thought you were dead.”

Regulus swallowed sharply in an attempt to remove the large lump forming in his throat.

He was unsuccessful.

“Regulus? Are you alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Evan…I’m so sorry…”

“Regulus? What’s going on? Seriously where are we?” Evans voice becomes more panicked and confused.

Regulus simply stares at him, tears falling down his face. After a few minutes of silence, it finally dawns on him. His face drops.

“No.”

“Evan, I’m so sorry.”

“No. No no no no.”

“Evan-“

“Please tell me it’s not true.” Evan pleads.

Regulus simply walks over to him and wraps his arms around him as he falls to his knees.

He doesn’t burst into tears. Or sob. Or scream.

Instead, Evan sits there, leaning on Regulus as he continues to mutter words of empathy and clings on to his best friend. Evans face is almost blank. The destructive worlds of devastation, heartbreak and pain boiling up inside. Evan has the face of a man who’s been utterly and completely broken.

“Barty…”

“Evan I-”

“We were engaged,” Evan finally smiles sadly “Did you know that?”

Regulus simply smiles and shakes his head.

“Suppose it wouldn’t have meant much anyway, ‘till death do us part’ my fucking ass.”

Chapter Text

If you were a teacher,
I would fail your class.
Take it over and over again until you noticed me.
If you were a waiting room,
I would never see a doctor.
I would sit there with first aid kit and bleed…

August 1981

Dorcas arrived sometime later. With her came her girlfriend Marlene Mckinnon, who Regulus had about three decent conversations with during their school years.
Seeing them again was hard, especially since neither Regulus nor Evan had barely spoken to Dorcas since she left Hogwarts in 1978, if you don’t count dozens of unread and discarded letters she threw away, unwilling to keep contact after they became death eaters. It’s not as if either of them had much of a choice in that, anyway.
It was nice, talking to her again, good even, catching up. If you call recounting their lives over the last four years catching up. It was strange though, so strange. But it was good, it finally felt like he was making some progress.

***

“Regulus?”

Regulus turns away from his book to face Marlene as she wanders into the room. It’s a replica of the library at Hogwarts, excluding any other students, and is admittedly one of Regulus’ favourite places.

“Yes?” Regulus frowns at Marlene’s expression. It’s painful and uncomfortable, but not embarrassed, just uneasy. “What’s wrong?”
He's surprised she’s coming to him about something, Regulus never really knew her outside of being Dorcas’ girlfriend. He hasn't even spent much time with her here, or even had a proper conversation with her alone.

“There’s something I need to tell you, about the night I died.”

Regulus shifts uncomfortably. He personally hates talking about his own death, he couldn’t bring himself to answer any of Evan’s questions when he first arrived, simply telling Evan that he was on a mission and lost control. All in all, Regulus tries not to think about it, too much.

“Mhm, what about it?” Regulus finally responds.

“You can’t tell Evan and especially Dorcas. Please Regulus. I don’t want this to hurt them, but I don’t know what to do or if I should even-”

“Marlene what-”

“Barty was there.”

‘Okay what the actual fuck’ is Regulus’ first thought. He knew Barty was a death eater. Of course Regulus knew, he joined as soon as Evan did at the ripe age of seventeen. But how could he do that? Barty had a similar relationship with Marlene to Regulus -which was a practically nonexistent one- but still? He knew how much Marlene meant to Dorcas, and Barty knew what he was doing, he had to. How could he do that to Dorcas? How much had they drifted apart from each other while he wasn’t there? Do Pandora and Barty even speak anymore? How much did he fucking miss?

“Regulus? Are you alright?”

Regulus stands up suddenly. He has to get out of here, go anywhere, it doesn’t matter, just away. He won't let her see him cry. Not in life or death.

“I’m sorry, I have to go.”

“Regulus, please! I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have mentioned it to you or anyone. Please just-“

“I won't tell them.” Regulus tells her, trying not to choke on his words. “I’m sorry, I just need to leave.”

“He didn’t do anything! I swear to you Regulus he was just there; he didn’t kill anyone. I only knew it was him because his mask fell off when-“

Her words are cut off as he bursts through the library doors, not even noticing where he is, only the current identity crisis he’s in. Regulus storms through the overly decorated kitchen he has found himself in and lets out a yell before kicking a small wooden stool that sits next to the counter. His foot goes right through it.

“What the fuck?!” he tries to say, as he almost falls over, but no sound comes out. He tries again to no avail. It's then that he finally realizes where he is. He’s in a small unfamiliar cottage. Outside the windows he doesn’t see houses, but fields and farmland that goes on for miles. The interior of the house itself is heavily decorated with random assortments of different objects and ornaments. The walls are covered in paintings and both magical and non-magical photographs. On closer inspection, he recognizes the people in one of the moving pictures.

His eyes widen as he identifies the people as him and his friends at Hogwarts. A version of Regulus -not much younger looking as he looks now- is sitting cross-legged on the grass, scowling at Barty's feet sprawled across his lap. Barty’s head is leant upon Evan's stretched-out legs, mouth open wide in laughter, while Evan sports a similar expression, gazing down at him. Pandora is lying on her stomach beside them, head propped up on her hands and the only one smiling at the camera. Dorcas must’ve been the one who took it.

Regulus stumbles back in shock, just as a familiar blond woman enters the room. Pandora is wearing a flowing blue sundress and is laughing at the tall dark-haired man who follows into the room after her. Barty has a small giggling baby girl on his shoulders and is spinning around faster and faster as he bumps into various pieces of furniture. The child just continues to squeal as Pandora continues to laugh.

Regulus says their names but goes unnoticed.

“Barty! Careful, Luna’s only eight months old!”

They all continue to laugh as Barty finally stops spinning and lifts Luna off his shoulders and passes her into her mother's arms before collapsing on one of the armchairs.

Pandora carefully places Luna on the couch and then sits down beside her. Luna immediately crawls back into her mother's lap, and Pandora allows it with a smile.

“I haven’t seen you in months Barty, where have you been?” Pandora pulls Luna closer to her, “we’ve missed you.”

“I've been around, been hired for a few odd jobs,” Barty replies casually.

“Not getting into any trouble, are you? Please Barty things are just so dangerous at the moment and I don’t know if I could bear to lose you especially after-“

“I’m fine, Pandora I promise. Things are fine.”

“You know you’re welcome to stay anytime, right? Me and Xeno wouldn’t mind at all, Luna would love to have you here.”

“Thanks, Panda, really, but I’m fine, promise. I'm still staying at our flat and the wards may be the strongest in the country. I’m fine. Really.” Barty says sincerely.

“Okay, but know you’re always welcome. And if you ever need anything else, and I mean anything, I'm only an owl away.” Pandora says, mildly satisfied with the response.

“Thank you. That means a lot.” Barty says, beaming at Luna who is grabbing at the flowers on Pandora’s dress.

They sit in comfortable silence for a few moments. Regulus watches silently, well, it's not as if he has much of a choice. After a few minutes, Barty stands up.

“Anyway, thanks for having me, I’ll see you soon.”

Pandora stands up after him, “Where are you going? You can stay for dinner if you would like.”

“Sorry Panda, I would love to but I better head home before dark. Like you said, it's dangerous times, can never be too careful.” Barty says before walking over to the fireplace. “Bye girls!” he shouts cheerily before he is engulfed by the green flames.

Regulus suddenly finds himself in the Malfoy's manor, recognising it from when he attended his cousin’s wedding. In the centre of the large dining room is the impossibly long dining table. Each chair, except for one, is taken by a death eater, some Regulus recognise, others obviously newer members. And of course, sitting at the very head of the table, is the dark lord.

Regulus curses. So, it really was all for nothing. He knew from Evan that Voldemort was still powerful, but he had hoped his efforts would at least weaken him slightly. Had Kreacher even managed to destroy the Horcrux?

“My apologies, my lord. Please continue.” Barty said anxiously, his previously happy demeanour replaced with a tight frown as he taked the empty seat. Bellatrix grinned manically from the other end of the table.

“You are forgiven, Mr Crouch, though I do hope for your sake that your lateness will not be repeated.” Voldemort says unbothered, while Bellatrix continues to giggle insanely next to him. “It is fortunate, however, that you have entered at an important time. I have to announce, there have been words spoken of a prophecy…”

The words fade out as Regulus appears back in the waiting room, an unsettled expression taking up his face.

“That wasn’t a memory, was it?” Regulus asks, though he already knows the answer.

“No, you have just visited your friends, Barty and Pandora.” I reply.

“Did you do that? Can I go back again? I need to know-“

“No, unlikely, and absolutely not. I promise you will understand, all in good time.”

Regulus groans but accepts my words, immediately going back to the library. Regulus knows that he shouldn’t tell anyone, not yet at least. If I'm right, he’s sure everyone will know eventually anyway.

Chapter Text

October 31st, 1981

After two and a half years of (somewhat) living here, Regulus has managed to develop a subtle routine of sorts. Every morning, he wakes up in his reimagined childhood bedroom in Grimauld to the hum of music from his muggle radio alarm clock at precisely 6:00 AM, makes a cup of tea and goes to watch the London sunrise. He hasn't been able to visit his friends or brother in a few months, but he’s worked out that he can look in on small, broader moments like this. The constant but slow movements and changes in colour of the clouds help to ground him. It makes him feel more human, more real. It gives him a sense of normality and anonymity, as if he’s just like any other person, gazing up at the morning sky, just to enjoy a moment of peace, as if the world isn't falling to flames and darkness just out of his reach.

Afterwards, he prepares and consumes a bowl of apple and cinnamon porridge - his favourite from his time at Hogwarts, which feels like a lifetime away now - while reading the ‘Daily Prophet’. The news has inevitably continued to become increasingly morbid. It makes Regulus’ heart ache bitterly, knowing that he could've done something; he could have stopped it all. Unfortunately for every Muggle and the majority of Witches and Wizards in England, fate had other plans. He just couldn't have survived; he just had to have that one feeble sip of water from that cursed fucking lake. It’s obvious Kreacher wasn't able to carry out his final order; of course, a house elf couldn't do it alone. Regulus wasn't even able to find out how many Horcruxes had been created before he died. It's not like any of that mattered now. There was nothing he could do from here. He would just have to hope that someone would discover the dark lord’s secret, the same as he had all that time ago.

When he is finished eating, he proceeds to the library/study to spend 30 minutes to over an hour on his novel before heading off to Dorcas’ for morning tea and biscuits. She lives in a tiny, cozy flat with Marlene, which Regulus has been told is identical to the one they lived in before they passed. Rebuilding his friendship with Dorcas was difficult, but he had been forgiven for what had happened at the end of their school years the moment Regulus had told her about his plan, as well as his failure. He had expected Dorcas to continue to yell and scream at him for the betrayal, curse him for not telling him or asking for help. But surprisingly, she just rushed to give him a teary hug and thanked him for trying and apologised for how they had left it. He respected her for that; he had always respected Dorcas. Even in their early school years, Regulus had idolised her, not that he would ever admit that after they became friends. Dorcas had always been cool, but never cold. She was kind and friendly to most, and a lot of things Regulus was not. However, they had many common interests, such as potions, muggle books, and most importantly, they both cared for their friends and each other. Dorcas saw Regulus for who he was underneath the cold, abrasive layer he wore almost all of the time. This is why she took it so hard when he had told her about his plans to become a Death Eater, and revealed the ugly black mark he had received as some kind of a fucked up birthday present. Needless to say, he had left out crucial details, such as his actual plans to take down Voldemort from the inside, but he couldn’t risk even his closest friends knowing, in the off chance it should further risk their or his own life. The two of them would never be the same, but they were enough for Regulus at least.

After finishing a slow conversation (there's proven not much to talk about after a few months) and much idle sipping, Regulus returns to either the Grimauld’s or Hogwart’s library to spend his afternoon reading. He has now learnt over 50 varieties of magic, thousands of spells and mastered hundreds of potion recipes, none of which he can or will ever be able to put into proper use. What a waste. Nevertheless, it gives him something to do, a goal to pursue. Something, anything to stop him from going insane. Insanity has proved itself to be the biggest obstacle he has had to avoid, especially during the first two years he spent somewhat alone. Time moves similarly to that on Earth, with the absence of a sun or moon, unless Regulus deliberately seeks them out. But one thing about this place is that there are always clocks wherever you go. Not in large or absurd amounts, however, you will find that if you look around for it, you will always discover a clock present in every room or place you go to. Even in recreations of real places on earth, one will appear where it was absent. Calendars are also usually within reach, though not as frequently, always conveniently flipped to the right month and/or day. This is to help, Regulus supposes, to keep track, to delay insanity as long as possible. This way, Regulus can keep holidays such as Birthdays, Christmas and Halloween, not that he cared much for them before, but it helps to have these special events to break up his carefully crafted routine every once in a while.

At 5:00 PM, Regulus goes to Evan’s for drinks and dinner. Unlike Dorcas, conversation with Evan isn't as slow. They talk about anything and everything, Regulus recons it’s because of their semi-identical upbringings. Both were born to slightly insane blood supremacist families and became heirs after their older brothers either died or left. Both were forced to take the mark when they turned 16 and became Death Eaters somewhat against their will, not that they really had any other choices. They had also known one another for longer, hiding away at pureblood galas since they were children, stealing the expensive handcrafted desserts they weren't supposed to eat, talking about what they wanted to do when they grew up. Evan had wanted to be an auror, to protect people from exactly what he had become. Regulus hadn't liked the things they had been forced to do as Death Eaters, but he knew Evan despised it. He had screamed at Barty when he first proposed that he would join as well. Regulus was aware that Barty didn’t understand why Evan was so upset back then, but Regulus did. Regulus knew that if Evan had had the choice of which side of the war to fight on, he would be standing next to Sirius and James in battle, not Regulus and Barty and the rest of the Death Eaters.

Often after dinner, they would end up on the roof of Evan's cottage, stargazing, while they spoke quietly or sat in comfortable silence. Unlike Regulus, Evan had designed his own small yet comfortable home, rather than his childhood home. Regulus can't blame him; he had been to Evan’s house, or should he say mansion, as a kid. It was huge, but not a home of any description. Evan and his siblings were brought up solely by nannies, in a strict, no-play, no-nonsense household. He barely saw his parents, as they were in entirely separate wings, with different sleeping, dining and lounging areas. As a child, Evan was even convinced they had constructed a schedule to purposely avoid him. The only time he ever really saw them was at events or when he was being punished. Dissimilar to Regulus’ mother’s methods of regular starvation, locking in cupboards and plain old torture, Druella Rosier was infamous for her unique and unusual disciplinary approach to her children’s ‘misdemeanours’. For example, she would force them to run laps of the grounds on an empty stomach until they could barely stand, then get into a boiling hot bath before going immediately into a freezing cold stream straight from the tip of her wand. Evan used to joke that it was good training for when he became a member of the Slytherin Quidditch team, but Regulus always noticed the pained look behind his pasted-on smile. Evan’s cottage now was nothing like the house he used to live in, with plants in every corner, a shower with bright turquoise tiles and photos lining the walls. Photos that were never actually taken, but Evan had somehow gotten hold of. Their Quidditch team when they all joined in third year, Barty, Evan and Pandora sitting by the lake, the three boys in their dorm in first year, scoffing sweets like their lives depended on it on their first night at Hogwarts, because really, what else mattered? Simpler times coat the cottage walls like a hard shell, protecting the insides from further breakage. Regulus knows Evan misses Barty with all of his being, and the waiting required for Barty to return to him is worse than any punishment his mother could ever conjure up.

Regulus usually bids Evan goodnight before 10:00 PM, and returns home to prepare for bed and read a non-fiction Muggle novel before going to sleep.

Today, however, is not like every other day. Today, Regulus woke up with a bad feeling, and so in response, he headed straight to Evan’s. He knocks loudly on the door and waits a few moments before he comes face to face with a sleepy-looking Evan.

“Regulus, what the fuck. It's six in the fucking morning, why are you awake?” Evan demands.
“Im always awake at six”, Regulus responds, barging past Evan, who rolls his eyes and murmurs something along the lines of “of course you are” before trekking over to join Regulus on the couch.
“What’s going on?” Evan asks finally.
“I have a bad feeling.” Regulus states, mouth pressed tight into a straight line.
“You woke me up. At six am. Because you have a bad feeling?”
“Yes.”
“Regulus, I am going to kill you someday.”
“Well, it's a bit late for that. Also, that's my line.”
“Oh, for fucks sake”, Evan says, exhausted, standing up to move into the kitchen, “I'll make tea then.”

***