Chapter Text
“Janet wore a mantel green
And wolf-keen was her will.
Into the forest's heart she went
while stars shone on the hills”
Tamlin and the Fairy Queen by Faun
When the beast broke through the door of their cabin, Nesta had been lying on her thin and scratchy strawbed, wrapping the old threadbare blanket around herself trying to lull herself into sleep despite the winter cold. One moment the freezing night had been silent except for the soft breathing of her sisters next to her and their father‘s uneven wheeze, the next the shabby room erupted into chaos.
An explosion of golden fur, deadly claws and sharp teeth tore through wood and wardings alike. A bellowing roar shook the small building, vibrating through her bones. For a brief heartbeat, Nesta stared up at the creature, her blood freezing in her veins, it had to be a dream… just a nightmare. With a loud shriek, she barely registered as her own, she scrambeled out of the beast’s way. No. No, this was real! In her panic to get away from the black claws and snapping jaws, she stumbled over something. No, not something. Someone. Elain, in her terror, could barely stand. Nesta grabbed her younger sister and tore her to her feet. Pulling both of them as far away from the raging beast as they could in the small space of their cabin. Nesta‘s back hit the rough stone of the hearth. Elain clung to her, whimpering desperately into Nesta‘s shoulder. Nesta pulled them both down, wrapping her arms around her sister, trying to shield her. Cowering low to the ground, making them as small of a target as possible might keep them safe. It was a ridiculous thought. A desperate thought.
Another bellow shook the walls, belatedly Nesta realised that she could understand the beast.
“MURDERERS!“
The thundering beat of her heart almost stopped in her chest. She had thought herself terrified before, but now the new realisation swept over her like a cold wave.
She didn‘t know what type of wild beast she had thought was attacking them. Maybe a bear had woken from its winter slumber or a starving mountain lion. In truth, the panic of the moment had driven any rational thought she could have had from her mind.
But as she cowered in front of the hearth holding a whimpering Elain, her mind, briefly paralyzed by fear, haltingly caught up with what was happening around her. Nesta instinctively jerked one of her arms out of Elain‘s clammy grip, the thin iron bracelet suddenly feeling cold against her skin.
The Beast stood tall in the middle of the room. Its golden catlike body was unlike any mountain lion in both size or colour. The head was shaped like that of an enormous wolf. A set of many-pronged antlers scratched at the roof of their home. She knew this wasn‘t any ordinary wild beast. It was a Faerie.
And just in front of it, only the broken table between them, stood Feyre. Stupid, proud and brave. Foolishly brave to a fault, as she had always been.
Nesta stared in horror at her youngest sister, who put herself directly in front of the maw of the beast. Directly behind Feyre, only a few feet from Nesta and Elain, lay their father. At a glance Nesta could tell that in a desperate attempt to get out of the beast‘s way his knee must have given out. From his scrambling attempts to get back up on his feet, she knew something must have given out.
„P-please,“ their father stammered in his futile attempt to get up,“Whatever we have done, we did so unknowingly, and—„
The cold fleeting thought passed her mind, that it didn‘t matter anymore. The Faerie beast would devour them all and then she wouldn‘t ever have to hate her father ever again. With a shuddering breath she pushed the ugly thought back down.
“W-w-we didn‘t kill anyone,“ to her shame, her own voice sounded no less fearful and uncertain than her father‘s. The faerie‘s glowing green eyes shifted from Feyre to their father and lastly to Nesta. She held out her shaking arm with the iron band, forcing herself to not cringe away under its eerie gaze. She desperately tried to silence the voice in her head that screamed how utterly ridiculous she was for believing a mere scrap of metal could protect her from this creature.
Iron was supposed to repel Faeries. Everybody said so…
But the wards had not kept out this Faerie either.
Suddenly Feyre dashed forward. Nesta surpressed a startled cry. What was she doing? Did she mean to attack the beast.
In response the beast raised itself higher, its earthshattering roar overshadowing the cracking wood where its antlers brook the boards of the ceiling. Feyre wisely took a few steps back, clutching something in her hands. A knife?
“Get out, and begone,“ Feyre demanded.
Nesta wanted to scream at her sister, but her voice failed her, only a whimper managed to leave her throat.
The beast lunched toward Feyre. She managed to stumble back just in time, evading the swiping claws and snapping jaws only at a hair’s breath. In retaliation she threw the knife at the beast, but the aim was off, and it swatted the useless weapon behind itself out of Feyre‘s reach. Finally Feyre retreated further back, their father grabbed his youngest pulling her down next to him. Nesta realised that the useless man might finally try to protect them now that their final hour had arrived.
“WHO KILLED HIM?“, the beast prowled closer, shattering the broken table under its paws.
Suddenly a small desperate hope bloomed in her chest. It hadn't killed them yet and no matter how cruel and gruesome the tales made faeries out to be, there had to be a reason.
Nesta frantically raked her thoughts. Who was it talking about? Who did it think they had killed? Maybe… maybe there had been a misunderstanding… She almost could have laughed at the stupidity of her own thoughts.
Feyre, foolishly, bravely stepped in front of the beast again.
Relief flooded Nesta, when the beast did not immediately rip her sister in shreds.
It growled low and viciously.
„The wolf.“
No. Oh no. Nesta wanted to wail. There had been no misunderstanding after all. Desperately she hoped that with the pelt gone the beast might still be convinced…
“A wolf?“
Elain‘s quiet voice startled Nesta. Her sister stared at the beast with wide eyes, her glance briefly flicking to Feyre. No, there would be no deceiving that creature. Not with the murderer it was looking for stood proudly in front of it.
“A large wolf with a gray coat,“ the beast snarled.
Bracing her shaking knees she grabbed at the rough stones behind her, pulling herself slowly upright. Elain looked up at her, fearful and confused. She grabbed at Nesta trying to pull her back. Nesta silently batted away Elain‘s feeble attempts to hold her back. Her gaze was firmly locked onto Feyre. Foolishly brave Feyre.
Her youngest sister stood tall and straight. Betraying no outward sign of fear. She lifted her chin proudly as she spoke.
“If it was mistakenly killed what payment could we offer in exchange?“
Forcing herself to take calm and measured steps Nesta stepped up next to Feyre.
“The payment you must offer is the one demanded by the treaty between our realms.“
The beast’s eyes flickered to her, taking her measure. It seemed even more giant up close. More real. Less like a nightmare made of shades and smoke, bound to vanish come morning. There was no denying that it was made of real flesh and blood. A living breathing creature, and no less dangerous for it. It had come to hunt down the murderer of a wolf. Nesta tried not to wonder why a faerie would concern itself with the death of a mere animal. It truly didn‘t matter. The only thing that mattered now was making sure her foolish, brave sister didn‘t get herself killed for the sake of her own stupid pride. Feyre‘s eyes flickered over to Nesta. Surprise, disbelief, and behind it all a glimmer of fear in her eyes. Taking a shaking breath, brazing herself for what she had to do. Nesta pushed Feyre back. Her sister stumbled next to their father, who had finally managed to right himself on his knees if not his feet.
„Keep her from spewing anymore nonsense, father,“ Nesta hissed.
Feyre’s surprise left her unsteady enough for their father to pull her back down next to him. Her confused eyes sought out Nesta‘s, demanding an explanation.
Nesta had no time for that. Swirling back around she faced the beast. It‘s emerald gaze focused on her, regarding her with… surprise…distaste…interest? She wasn't sure. Keeping her spine rigid and her knees locked to keep her limbs from shaking, she raised her chin.
“You break into our home in the middle of the night. What payment do we need to offer you greater than what you‘ve already taken from us?“
Nesta had finally mastered her voice, it no longer shook as it had before.
The beast let out a barking shout, almost a laugh.
“I care not for your home. Who killed the wolf?“
“I did.“
A gasp went through the room. Nesta wasn't sure if it had been Elain or Feyre. Like so many things it didn‘t really matter anyway. The only important thing now was for the beast to believe her lie.
The faerie lowered it head, bringing its eyes level with hers. Its emerald green gaze searching. Nesta kept her head raised, her own gaze steely.
The beast let out a low growl.
“You do not strike me as a huntress,“ it shot a glance behind her in Feyre‘s direction, „Do you think lying will protect her?“
Nesta forced out a derisive snort into the tense silence.
“My sister is impulsive and brash. A cow stomping through the undergrowth in the woods. As much as she might style herself a huntress, that girl is useless for such work. I‘ve been trying to teach her for years.“
Sweat ran down her nape, but still Nesta‘s will held firm. Her voice didn‘t shake or trip nor did her gaze waver as she loudly proclaimed her lies.
The beast regarded her silently for what seemed to her an eternity before it finally spoke again.
“Let her speak.“
Confused, Nesta followed its movement as the beast stepped past her and stared down at her youngest sister and her father. New found terror rose inside her as she realised that the only reason Feyre hadn‘t yet destroyed Nesta‘s ruse was because their father had silenced her. He held his youngest daughter down with one arm and clasped one hand over her mouth muffling any protest she could have offered.
Hesitantly he let her go as the beast directed his green gaze at him.
“No! I did it! I killed the wolf! Nesta is lying. She is no hunter.“
Nesta‘s stomach sank into a pit. Foolishly brave, as always. She wanted to weep. Didn‘t her sister understand that she was trying to save her. To save all of them. How often had Feyre complained that Nesta didn't contribute enough. That she should marry and get out of the house. That she was just a burden on Feyre‘s back. No. Nesta wouldn‘t be a burden anymore.
She started to laugh. It was an ugly mocking laugh and it made Feyre finally shut up.
The beast cocked its head regarding her curiously.
“I don‘t know what type of payment you want, Faerie,“ Nesta spat, „but if you want blood in exchange for your wolf, then you can have her. She has always just been a mean spiteful jealous little thing. Too good to cook and clean. Too good to toil with the rest of us. Prancing through the woods and styling herself a mystical huntress out of the storybook.“
Nesta directed her gaze at Feyre, trying to ignore the hate and rage in her youngest sister‘s eyes. That was fine. She could hate Nesta all she wanted. Soon it wouldn‘t matter anymore. Nesta would be gone and Feyre could go on hating her for the rest of her life.
“Your jealous lies really know no bounds, Feyre. I cook and clean for you. I mend your clothes. I even bring you on the hunt but then you just have to botch it. You thought to bring down a wolf?,“ Nesta let out a barking laugh,“ You spooked it, and then I had to bring it down!“
The Beast took a step closer to Nesta.
„You speak the truth?“
Before Nesta could respond, her father spoke up.
“It- It is true. My youngest daughter she- she is a willful girl. Her head is filled with fanciful tales that she is always chasing… I apologise if her lies have offended you, Master Faerie.“
The beast almost seemed to flinch away from their father. Nesta tensed, nervous that something he had said might set the beast off. But it only stepped away from her father and sister, turning back to her.
“As payment I demand a life for a life,“ Nesta couldn‘t hide her flinch as the beast‘s words confirmed what she had suspected, „Any unprovoked attacks on faerie-kind by humans are to be paid only by a human life in exchange.“
Silence fell over the cabin, the only sounds the ragged fearful breathing of their father and Elain‘s weeping.
“Most of you mortals have chosen to forget that part of the Treaty,“ the beast said.
Nesta‘s own breath started growing louder, threateningly close to turning into gasps.
“I- I- plea…,“ horrified she fell silent again as she realised that faced with her own death her speech had reverted back to panicked whimpers.
“You can die tonight or offer your life to Prythian by living in it forever, forsaking the human realm.“
“W-What?“ Live in Prythian? In her own terror, Nesta barely felt capable of following the Faerie’s speech.
“Do it, Nesta,“ her father‘s voice rooted in the moment, „Go.“
How dare he. How dare he do this now. The age old rage helped ground her. It didn‘t stave off the fear, but it reminded her to steel her spine.
She gave the beast a jerky nod. She didn‘t yet trust her voice not to shake.
“Then come,“ it commanded brusquely and turned to leave.
Nesta shot a hesitant glance back at her family. Elain sat still huddled in the back, where Nesta had left her, looking up at her with large tearfilled eyes. Feyre sat next to their father looking at her with complete disbelief and something else. Nesta wasn‘t sure. Their father one hand still clasped around Feyre‘s, not fully trusting that his daughter wouldn‘t storm forward again.
Nesta almost stepped back towards them. But a growl behind her stopped her. She turned around and stared at the beast. It stood in the ruined doorframed, backlit by the cold silvery light of the moon. In this light its golden fur and glowing green eyes had an unearthly glow to it, in all its sharp clawed viciousness cramped in their little dark cabin it had never looked as intimidating and powerful as it did now. Swallowing down her fear, Nesta raised her chin, feining an authority she did not possess.
“I wish to say goodbye. Isn‘t it customary in Prythian to allow the condemned their last word.“
The beast did not answer, except for a twitch of its ear, but it did not move either. It seemed to be waiting. Deciding to take this as permission Nesta hurried back to her family. Feyre rose to her feet next to their father, who still had not let go of her. Nesta hesitated briefly before grabbing her sister in a hug.
Feyre stiffened in her arms, before finally returning the hug.
“Nesta, why would -“
“Shshsh…,“ squeezing her sister harder, Nesta gently silenced Feyre. It wouldn‘t do now for their goodbye to ruin everything. A second body squeezed in next to them. Elain had managed to leave her place by the hearth. Nesta let go of Feyre to wrap her arms around her other sister one last time. After too brief a moment she let go and slowly stepped back. She directed her gaze down to their father who still knelt on the ground. His head was lowered his shoulders hunched. Whitehot anger sparked in Nesta‘s chest.
“Don‘t you dare do nothing again.“
Elain gave a shocked little gasp. Feyre remained silent.
Slowly their father raised his head and looked up at her.
“You can‘t do nothing. They will need you. Do you understand?“
A slow nod was her only answer. No, he not would do anything. Nesta knew. She could spent her last moment here screaming at him. He would not do anything.
„Here,“ surprised Nesta looked up. Elain held out her cloak. It was almost threadbare and its faded colour was closer to grey than the tranquil green it had been years ago. Feyre took the cloak from Elain and silently wrapped it around Nesta‘s shoulders.
Nesta squeezed Feyre‘s hand, as her sister tied the cloak at her throat. Her fingers twitched before Nesta let go. She met Elain and Feyre‘s gazes one after the other. There were so many things that had to be left unsaid. Forcing a small smile, she turned around and stepped towards the beast. Steadying her steps, keeping her back straight. Whatever hellish faerie realm this creature intended to lead her to, she would face it with her head held high and her back unbent.