Chapter Text
Levi's heart was in his throat, both horrified and elated by Eren's sudden presence, swiftly followed up by scalding embarrassment. He couldn't even speak, mouth moving without sound.
Isabel was the first to recover from the unexpected arrival of the boy that had turned Levi's relatively peaceful, but lonely life inside out.
"Eren... It's not what you think... I'm- I'm here as Levi's therapist," she said, tone level as she attempted to explain and hopefully calm the jealous aggression that was rolling off Eren in the doorway.
"Get the fuck off of him," Eren said through gritted teeth. He was breathing heavily and shaking from head to toe in fury. His voice grew louder as he said, completely disregarding the fact that what he and Levi had just done was also entirely unprofessional, "What kind of professional holds their patient while they are naked?" When Isabel made no action to move, Eren screamed, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HIM YOU DISGUSTING WHORE!" He took one step closer to the two.
Levi's eyes went wide with belated understanding and he pushed Issy's hands away from him roughly before clasping the towels draped around him tighter and attempted to stand up on legs that had long since gone numb and shook under his weight. He hugged himself as if he was cold and licked his dry lips. "Eren..."
Isabel made a soft sound of surprise, but didn't move to touch Levi again, even to steady him. Instead, she got to her feet as well and brushed herself off, leaning to turn the still running shower off before she turned her attention back to the two. "I think I should give you two some privacy. Levi, make an appointment later this week," she said without room for argument and cautiously made her way out of the spacious bathroom, skirting around Eren.
When she'd gone, Levi was left pressed back against the tiled wall with no more barriers to wrap around himself. His breath hitched desperately as if he'd forgotten to breathe and only just remembered he needed air.
"Eren..." He repeated on the quaking exhale.
Eren didn't answer. He just turned around and left the bathroom to grab a blanket from the bed. He went back to Levi and moved to wrap the man tightly in the comforter.
Before Levi could protest, Eren picked the man up like a princess and carried him to the bed. He placed Levi down gently, sat beside him, and softly ran his fingers through Levi's damp hair. A scowl remained etched on his face in contrast to his delicate movements.
Eren continued to pet Levi, but he wouldn't meet the man’s eyes. His beautiful green eyes were trained on the top of Levi's head. After an eternity, he said, "Was she here the entire time? Were you guys just sitting here making fun of me while I masturbated on the phone?"
Tears started to steam down Eren's face, rolling silently over his cheeks and clinging to his chin, but he still wouldn't look Levi in the eye. "Am I some kind of joke to you Levi?"
Levi shook his head, unconsciously leaning into the stroking of Eren's fingers in his hair, holding the comforter close around his shivering body. "No!" he blurted out before he drew in another shaking breath and wet his lips, "No, I... I called her... I was... After what we did... I panicked... I'm sorry Eren... This is all my fault..." He bit his lip and dropped his own gaze to his curled fingers around the material of the blanket. Ever so slowly, he uncurled them one by one and once free of their death grip, he snaked his arm out of the blanket to cup Eren's face gently, thumbing away the tears. "You aren't a joke Eren... You're... You mean so much to me..."
Without warning, Eren cupped Levi's cheeks with both hands before he swooped down and claimed Levi's lips for his own. Eren broke the kiss just enough so that their lips were barely touching and opened his eyes. He wore a look of fierce determination. "I'm not losing you to Isabel," he said as his lips ghosted over Levi's, "Or anyone else. You are mine Levi Adrian Ackerman. Only mine. Do you understand?"
Levi swallowed hard and nodded ever so slightly, the motion brushing their lips together over again. "It's... It's never been anyone else Eren," he assured in a husky whisper, his eyelashes tangling with Eren's as they stared at one another, so close...
His fingers slid from Eren's cheek down his throat to the base of his neck, thumbing over the sharp edges of his collarbone and he pressed forward almost desperately, a low whimper sounded as he tasted Eren again, giving in to the desire he’d been viciously fighting for days.
Eren, not breaking the kiss, crawled onto the bed and swung his leg over Levi's hips to take a seat on the older man’s lap as his arms framed Levi's head. Then Eren turned his head to the side to deepen the kiss and licked over the seam of Levi's lips to gain access. Their tongues slid over each other for a moment before Eren ground his hips down onto Levi's.
Levi whimpered into Eren's mouth, reminding Eren not to lose control. Eren ripped away from Levi and rolled off the man to the side, gasping for air. Laying on his back, he turned his head to Levi and said "I love you much."
Levi was breathing heavily, puffs of heated air slipping between slick and kiss reddened lips. He shivered in response to Eren's words, his body tingling with a continuous current of electricity. He licked his lips, the taste that was entirely Eren's lingering in his mouth and he could feel the heat at the back of his neck again.
It took several long seconds for him to make up his mind, but he finally laid back into his bed next to the young man, turning onto his side to watch him as Eren looked back at him. "Okay... I'm... I'm not going to run away anymore Eren... I'm going to try," he replied quietly, shifting his body ever so subtly closer to the brunette next to him. He gnawed on his bottom lip a second or two before he continued, "Are you... Staying over?"
Eren turned on his side to face Levi as well. "If you run, I'll chase after you," he said with a crooked smile. "I've missed you these last couple days. I haven't been able to sleep without you beside me. So if it's okay with you, I really, really, really, really want to stay over."
"Yeah... I want you to stay. I think I've... I've been missing you too," Levi admitted, ignoring the heat that filled his cheeks, his gaze flickered shyly from Eren's and he shifted in embarrassed discomfort. "Did you... You really didn't fool around with anyone else?"
He felt silly for asking because even if Eren had, it would change nothing in the way Levi felt about him. He wouldn't be pleased, but he wouldn't feel any less attached to Eren. And he didn't really doubt what Eren had said before. He had been so angry after all.
Eren just laughed. "No. I didn't," he said as he reached up to boop Levi's nose. "I seem to have standards now. It looks like you're the only person that does it for me anymore." He looked down as a red hue tinted his cheeks. "I... I couldn't get it up."
"That's good... I guess we have one more thing in common now then," Levi replied, nose crinkled slightly in a rather endearing expression from the playful contact of Eren's finger, watching the blush slowly stain golden cheeks a charming shade of rouge. He found himself smiling just a little, a subtle, lopsided little grin taking up residence in the corner of his mouth and he wriggled closer to Eren, carefully maneuvering the comforter from around him to keep his modesty in tact, but also slip the covers over the young man as well, settling his palm on the soft dipped curve of Eren's side beneath the heavy comforter and not looking directly at him, shivering a little in nervous apprehension, testing Eren's reaction and his own limits. It seemed a little easier somehow. Maybe he was too exhausted to be afraid or maybe it was relief after days of inner turmoil in which he’d pined for the young man and dreaded seeing him at the same time.
Maybe, he was getting used to it... He wanted to touch Eren so much, it ached.
Eren shifted closer to Levi as well, pulling their bodies flush together as he buried his nose into Levi's neck. Without looking up at Levi, Eren said with a kiss to Levi's jugular, "I have a question."
"Okay?" Levi said, a thread of weariness in the tone. He was shivering uncontrollably as goosebumps rose along his skin beneath the pressure of Eren's lips along his throat and he swallowed, mouth suddenly dry and he was abruptly aware of his indecency. He could feel every part of Eren that was touching his bare skin beneath the blanket with acute intensity.
"The first time you ever left me alone in your house, I found your porn collection," said Eren then he giggled. "Is that stuff really what you're into?... I think I can fulfill some of your fantasies... But some of them are just plain impossible for me," said Eren as he bit his lip. "I want to be everything you want." Eren peeked up at Levi with a worried look on his face. "It's been stressing me out for weeks."
Levi looked confused for several drawn out seconds until he remembered the box that was tucked in the far recesses of his closet. He'd forgotten it was even there. "No... I don't... Those were all Hange and Issy's idea... They kept buying them to try and help me with my problem, thinking eventually something would spark interest. All it did was embarrass me and make me incredibly uncomfortable. I've never even sat through more than a half an hour of most of them... I don't want you to be anything else Eren... It's only you that's ever made my body react the way it does, just you as you are," he explained, holding Eren's gaze through his embarrassment over the words. Of course Eren would be worried about something like that.
"Oh thank fuck," said Eren as he put his arms around Levi's neck to pull the man closer as he nuzzled their faces together. "I was so worried you didn't find me attractive ‘cause I didn't have fuzzy ears or a tail. I even was up all night on Amazon looking at furry costumes." Eren gave Levi three pecks on the mouth before he looked at him seriously again.
"I have another question," he whispered. Their faces were so close together that their noses were touching. Eren was drowning in the mercury depths of Levi's eyes, and he never wanted to set foot on dry land again.
Levi inhaled sharply when Eren kissed him in quick succession, chaste as it was, he hadn't been expecting it considering what they were discussing, but he wasn't disgusted, just a little skittish with so much prolonged contact, uncertain and unused to so much at once, and especially after his recent breakdown; he was a bit wary of sparking another. But it was pleasant in an unexpected way, to have Eren touch him so carefreely when he generally would have been trying to push him away by now. He didn't want to push him away; if anything, he wanted to be closer, relishing the warmth mingling between their bodies. He was naked and Eren was fully clothed; they were under the same blanket and so close that their noses brushed one another. They were sharing breath, and yet he wanted to be closer still. He’d panicked before, but he’d been alone then. Eren was here now; it was different. Isabel had said it was alright, that he should try. Eren made him different and Eren was different too.
"I'm an open book," he replied breathily, lips ghosting Eren's ticklishly with the response and his hand squeezed his side lightly, fingertips just barely caressing beneath the hem of Eren’s shirt to feel the smooth skin under the fabric. An electric thrill spread from the point of contact up his arm and through the rest of him with a pleasant buzzing of satisfaction.
"What are we now?" Eren asked as his jewel green eyes, flecked with gold stared deep into Levi's, searching for an answer, "I want to call you my boyfriend." Before Levi could answer, Eren closed his eyes and kissed Levi with an open mouth, tasting the sweetness of the other man’s tongue. "Mmm," Eren hummed, "I think I'm addicted to how you taste."
Levi made a sound into the kiss, reciprocating tentatively, parting his lips instinctively and breathing a sharp breath through his nose, exhaling when Eren broke the contact to hum against his mouth. "I guess... I don't know if I'm good boyfriend material, but I'll try... I want to try," he said as if he’d only just realized it himself. He shivered and pulled Eren's body closer to him, shifting his own so that he could be flush against him beneath the comforter, for once, simply allowing himself to do what his body was demanding, craving contact he'd been deprived of for days, for majority of his life really.
The moment Levi pulled him impossibly closer was when Eren realized that he was rock hard. He also realized that Levi would know too because he had just accidentally jabbed him with it. Blushing bright red, he pulled his hips back and said, "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry.... It's just. You're so hot... And so close. Just... Just gimme a minute to calm down." He ducked his face down into Levi's neck to hide his embarrassment and panted hot breaths across Levi's pulse point. "Fuck Levi," Eren groaned, "You make me way too horny.... Shouldn't be legal." He gave Levi's neck a little nibble in retaliation.
Levi shuddered and chased after Eren's retreating hips, "Wait... L-Let me feel..." he breathed, pupils dilating thickly in the squalling mercury and nearly swallowing it as his hand slid onto the young man's hip, thumbing over the soft skin covering the protrusion of bone beneath. He wanted to know, to feel the evidence of Eren's desire, to be sure it matched his own.
"Haah," Eren hissed as Levi felt his hip. His pelvis stuttered at the contact before Eren put his hands on Levi's hips to pull their groins together.
He lifted his head to look at Levi with fire in his eyes as he rolled his hips into the other man, slow and aggressive. "Mm," he hummed then turned to whisper in Levi's ear, "Can you feel that then?"
Even though he was still wearing sweats, both their erections were rubbing against each other as Eren continued to roll his hips into Levi.
Levi choked on his reply, squeezing his eyes shut and nodding, fingers tightening on Eren's hip, his other hand worming it's way from under him to grope at Eren's chest until he could snake it around to his back, palming beneath his shirt over his lower back, fingertips massaging those little dimples he'd been fixated on for days. His thoughts scattered as heat surged under his skin, potent and inebriating while he tried to meet the rolling thrusts of Eren's pelvis against his own. His brows scrunched together in concentration and pleasure.
"Good..." He breathed out harshly. "Eren... S'good..."
"I can make it feel better," Eren whispered in Levi's ear again. "Can I touch you?" He didn't stop rolling his hips into Levi's.
"O-kay," Levi agreed, breath hitching and he panted through blush stained, parted lips, head falling back against the pillow. He shivered violently in anticipation, uncertain where or how Eren would touch him, the words from their phone call earlier echoing distantly in his mind and his heart clambered in his chest.
Eren bit Levi's lip and tugged on it gently as he reached down to pull down his sweat pants. He danced his fingers over Levi's erection before he put their dicks together and stroked them with one hand. With an open mouthed kiss, he asked Levi, "Is this okay?"
Levi made a strangled sound, deaf under the rush of blood pounding in his ears thunderously when Eren's hand enveloped their erections, the sensation flooding his body with sizzling electricity, skittering bursts of brightness along his nerves and making him shudder violently. He instinctively bucked his hips, his fingers spasming in his hold on the younger man.
He swallowed hard and licked his lips trying to remember how to make his mouth work, "Yes..." he whispered roughly, hardly capable of verbalizing more. It was almost agonizing, torturous in a way he was entirely unused to. He should be afraid, push Eren away and go hide until it went away on it's own, but he couldn't even think beyond the heated press of their straining shafts trapped in the young man's experienced hand. It was really okay, like Issy had said. Eren wasn’t disgusted and it was okay to desire him. It was natural...
"Nnnn.... Haahh... So soft," Eren said as he started to suck bruises on the delicate skin of Levi's neck. He bucked his erection into Levi's as he stroked them together. It wasn't enough though. With skill one could only achieve through practise, Eren rolled over on top of Levi and kept stroking their dicks together. He gazed with lust filled eyes down on Levi before his mouth started to suck on different places of Levi's chest. Feeling bold, he leaned over to lick one of Levi's stiff nipples. "Mmmm you taste so good Levi," Eren said, a frantic edge to his voice as he started to lose control to the ecstasy. He had never been intimate with someone he cared so much for. It felt like he had taken a drug before he started petting at Levi. He loved this man so much and it hurt so good.
Levi looked at Eren from under heavily veiled lashes, face flushed as he shivered under the press of Eren’s body, hands settling on Eren's hips, thumbs pressing against the bones while his fingertips sought out the soft flesh at his back, caressing and squeezing unconsciously. He was making more breathy sounds, eager and encouraging as Eren's mouth moved over his skin, arching into the touch of tongue to a previously untouched and unexpectedly sensitive nipple. He hissed between his teeth, hips jerking up against Eren's unconsciously. He hummed guttural in the back of his throat, unable to even form any coherent words, hitched breath and throaty moans that vaguely sounded like the young man's name slipping out of his parted lips every now and again. He felt like he was melting inside while his body tensed and strained under the weight of Eren's skin against his own, heat gathering and coiling tight in his gut.
“Fuck,” Eren grunted, biting his lip with furrowed brows as he watched Levi get off to Eren pumping their dicks together. “C’mon lover… Wanna hear that pretty voice of yours saying my name…” Eren was steadily reaching his own orgasm, stroking hard as his hand and both erections were covered in precome.
Levi tensed and arched, soft groans escaping on heated breaths. He closed his eyes tightly, listening to Eren's demands and finding it impossible to refuse him just like it'd been on the phone, only now it really was Eren's skin on his own. "Eren, Eren, Eren, s'good... Can't..." he panted incoherently, whispering the young man's name in a mantra as he groped blindly at Eren's shoulders and chest. He stiffened so suddenly that his breath caught and he saw white for several long seconds as he came without any other warning. So unused to the sensation, he was overwhelmed and couldn't think straight.
"Jesus... Fuck... you are so fucking hot," Eren growled as he watched Levi orgasm. He let go of Levi's dick to milk it slowly with one hand, while his other pumped himself hard, thrusting powerfully into his fist until he came with a groan. He managed to catch all his jizz in one hand so that none of it would get on Levi; unsure if his semen would trigger Levi into a panic.
Eren was flushed as his chest heaved up and down, more from adrenaline than exertion. He focused his eyes to look down at Levi with a soft smile. Levi looked wrecked and so fucking peaceful, Eren was sure this was all a dream and he'd wake up disappointed once again.
Levi relaxed back into the bedding, shuddering every so often as skittering shocks of electricity assaulted him randomly. He kept his eyes closed as he tried to will his heart to slow its racing and his breath to even. He didn't feel dirty as he should, though his skin was beginning to prickle with the desire to scrub away the cooling evidence of their activities from his body and Eren's and they should change the sheets as well before they slept. It was at least a positive; his disgust was at a minimal about what exactly they'd done because nothing about it had felt wrong, but his obsessive need for cleanliness and order was demanding they get clean and sleep in clean bedding.
He swallowed against a slow forming knot of discomfort and finally opened his eyes enough to look at Eren. His breath caught. Eren looked beautiful, wild in a way Levi hadn't seen him before, uninhibited and without the ghosts that normally haunted the forest in his eyes. He unconsciously reached out to brush fingers through the young man's damp hair, fingertips tingling on contact. "We need to shower," he said finally, voice hoarse and a tad pleading but not yet panicked. He was too exhausted to consider the repercussions of their actions yet and he didn't want to. He wanted to be clean with Eren, wrap himself in his warmth and sleep because he always slept when he was with Eren. He wanted the peace it brought him, knowing Eren was safe, knowing he'd rather be there with Levi than with strangers, knowing he didn't have to hide himself from Eren.
Eren nodded his head with a gigantic smile before he scooped Levi up in his arms then slipped out of the bed. He made sure none of their mess got on anything else before he carried Levi princess style into the ensuite bathroom then sat him on the wooden bench in the walk in shower.
"How warm do you want it?" Eren asked, standing in front of the fancy dials, trying to figure out how they worked.
"As warm as you can handle it," the older man responded, not looking at Eren, embarrassment creeping beneath his skin, shy now that the lust had worn off and he was vulnerable. He was ashamed the he could not reign in the compulsion that forced him to shower for a third time in less than twenty-four hours, but Eren didn't seem to mind. Levi shouldn't be surprised. The younger male had always been extremely considerate of Levi's idiosyncrasies
"Boiling hot it is," Eren said before he turned back to the dials with his tongue stuck in the corner of his mouth; determined to make the water perfect for his love. He got the shower running, rinsed off his hands with cold water then put it as hot as possible to test it with his hand. "Fuck fuck too hot..." Eren hissed quietly, but repeated the process several more times until he found the hottest temperature he could stand.
Standing under the cascade of water, he ran his hands through his wet hair then off his eyes. "Water’s nice and hot... C'mere," Eren said with a smile, waiting for Levi to approach on his own since he didn't want to pressure the skittish man. He could always just shower quick then leave Levi alone to do his own thing. But Eren really wanted to shower with the man, not wanting to waste any form of contact he could get.
The short raven looked pensive, shifting his toes on the tile apprehensively. He was watching Eren beneath the spray and was struck by how similar the sight was to the morning they'd swam together. He delayed himself for several moments until Eren prompted him and he finally stepped forward. He was cautious, but not as skittish as he might have been had he been his usual self.
He slipped into the shower and closed the glass behind him, trying to both look and not look at Eren while he immediately reached for the body wash that smelled like lemon balm and lavender. He felt jittery, nervous for reasons he couldn't quite explain. It wasn't the kind of nerves he was expecting and it was baffling.
"Mm, so that's what makes you smell so good," Eren said, resting his chin on Levi’s shoulder as he curled his arms around Levi’s waist from behind. With his partners, he never ever cuddled. But now that he was with the love of his life, all he wanted to do was cuddle. He was a little disappointed they couldn't cuddle in bed right after, but this was just as good; holding Levi tight under the water. It wasn't sexual at all, more like Eren was touch starved and needed to feel Levi as much as possible before he was pushed away again.
Levi hummed as he cupped his hand and squeezed a generous amount of the body wash into it before replacing it on the shelf. He leaned back into Eren, instinctively responding to the trusted touch. It was okay; it was Eren. He began to lather up, the motions meticulous but not fevered. He even felt bold enough to soap Eren arms where they were around him, a soft smile playing unbidden on his lips. He almost felt normal.
Eren kissed Levi’s neck before he reached over the man to grab the body wash himself. "Now I'm gonna smell like you too," Eren said with an excited giggle, dumping soap into his hands and lathering up his body then moving to rub some on Levis back. "Could you get my back as well?" Eren asked, already turning around as he washed his torso and thighs.
Levi was quick to return the favour when Eren asked. It was almost soothing to wash Eren's skin in place of his own, appealing in a way that he was still having a hard time realizing. Everything about his feelings with Eren was new and he kept making connections in memories of before, feelings he'd had then that he'd ignored or set aside only to never analyze later. Now he knew he'd been playing blind. He didn't think this peace would last, but it was a start, a step in a long awaited recovery like Issy had said. He had no delusions about either of them being "cured"; they weren't, but there was the hope that they might come to be and it was enough for him to resolve to try.
When he'd finished washing Eren's back, he'd taken the time to soap himself up again, fulfilling the habitual routine he’d had for nearly as long as he could remember. Then he repeated the entire process while washing his hair. It took an extra minute, but he'd been doing it so long that it was surprisingly quick and efficient. His skin was flushed from the heat and the scrubbing, but not raw, darkened in places by kiss marks and his eyes looked soft but tired. He didn't even want to think of morning, just wanted to finish their shower and curl up in bed like he'd come to be used to. It had felt wrong without Eren there.
"Let's get out and dried off. I need to change the sheets before we sleep," he said, voice still somewhat hoarse, but less shaky than it had been, making the necessity of the actions clear. It would be quicker if Eren knew and assisted in the chore.
"Kay," Eren said, giving Levi a smooch on the mouth before he finished up his washing and opened the shower door to climb out, grabbing a towel for himself and a towel for Levi. He did a subpar job of drying then went into the bedroom to put his sweats back on and strip the bed.
Holding the sheets in a bundle he called to Levi, "I'm gonna put these in the wash so they don't stain. I'll be back to help you make it." Shuffling his feet, he made it downstairs with a happy yawn and a dozy smile, put the sheets in the wash then went back to Levi’s room.
Levi took his time drying off and went through the rest of his routine before bed. He dressed in a pair of loose blue and green plaid cotton pajama pants and a long t-shirt and was already beginning to redress the bed when Eren returned. He gave the young man a little smile before he went back to smoothing the bed linens and dressing the pillows in fresh cases while Eren assisted along the other side.
Once the sheets were on, he retrieved one of the spare comforters and spread it over the surface of the bed, turning down the top before he looked at Eren expectantly. Molly sauntered into the room and immediately hopped up to curl herself on the end of the bed as if to properly call an end to the night. Levi shook his head and crawled into his side of the bed, curling on his side facing away from Eren, too embarrassed to voice the desire he had to be held when he was usually the one doing the holding. It had been a bad night, a bad couple of days really and for once he didn't want to analyze his reasons or Eren's, didn't want to dwell on the things they'd done, but just be held and feel safe like he hadn't in such a long time.
Eren stared in confusion for only a moment until he realized what Levi was unable to say. Beaming to himself, he got into bed and stayed on his half before reaching forward to drag Levi across the bed to spoon. He curled his body around Levi’s so that they were touching from head to toe. Eren nuzzled his face into Levi's undercut then kissed Levi’s neck. This is where he was meant to be; in Levi, he had found his home.
"I love you, goodnight Levi," Eren said then sighed in drowsy happiness, settling down to go to sleep.
Levi tensed and went rigid at first when Eren pulled him in, the reactions made more on ingrained reaction than any real upset, considering it was what he'd been hoping for. He breathed silently, listening acutely, shivering in response to the press of soft lips to the back of his neck, making the skin burn and the old scars itch, but he didn't pull away. Unexpected warmth spread in his chest when Eren sighed his goodnight and faded into sleep.
Though exhausted, drained physically, mentally and emotionally, Levi remained awake for some time after Eren had dozed off and his breaths had evened and slowed in slumber. He'd laid there just feeling him against his back. Eren was warm everywhere they touched and his hold wasn't demanding or suffocating, but comforting and safe. Odd that.. His own fingers stroked over Eren's bare forearm where it curved around his middle, letting the repetitive motion relax him further and reveling in the contact he'd been denied so long. He didn't want to waste the chance while he had it; it wasn't often his anxiety left him alone for such a prolonged period of time. His thoughts rolled over one another like lazy waves on the beach, lapping at his consciousness in a lulled pattern. Eren had said he loved him and Levi now knew he loved him too. He should have said it back, but he hadn't been able. The words were somehow more intimate than what they had done just a few hours previous and he'd been too embarrassed to return the sentiment, feeling foolish and giddy.
Eventually, he wound down, closing his eyes and snuggling back against the press of Eren's body against his back and sighed, "I shouldn't, but I love you too Eren. I promise someday I'll tell you you're not dreaming."