Chapter Text
Every lights was so beautiful it hurts. It didn't feel real at all, yes, but in a good way. This feeling of having to let go of all logic, all beliefs, expectations and knowledges to apprehend this new world as it was ...it should be overwhelming. It should be horrifying to let go of the reality he learnt to live in for 16 years. And he knows deep down in his guts that this place is an illusion, with no concept of time. He knows this and he knows there are nobody around, it's an endless desert, beautifuly crafted, wild, sunny, easy and everything : a cage nonetheless . But it was freedom in a sense, it was maybe a dream to enjoy : maybe he got to experience a little of peace after all the hell he's been through. Finally, he was here and there and he cannot hide in this gigantic field of colored flowers and windy grass. It was warm, it was a home. Not HIS home but a place he could explore and where he doesnt has to change to fit. He belonged here...at least for a moment, a night which feels like a lifetime, maybe.
By what magic Mike ended up right here, in this breath taking landscape, he doesn't know. He believes he is sleeping cause he feels so light, he feels so good, so strong and so himself and he can't get to be himself in real life, so what he was gifted now is close to paradise. The last year feels like a blur and the year before he was such a fake bitch, always stressed out, always too worried to care about what was around. When he thought about it now, he didn't recognize this past memory of him as himself. His kid self couldn't turn out to be such a coward, a little and dishonest petty excuse of a man who hurts and is so easily hurt by his own words and shitty attitudes.
The walk is nice ; there is many little things to see if Mike pays attention at his surroundings but if he just feels the need to drift away, in harmless thoughts, there are no obstacles to trip on.
A sweet song from his childhood births in his head. He had forget that part till now : a good memory of friendship, of the softess of smiles, touches and silences, of easy understanding. Without words for it, it was more simple to not lie. Find connexion by just being next to each others, even when they were silent. Even when listening to a whispered song through the talkie walkie, coming for the other part of the town. The familiar breathing of the person in the other side that sings along was enough to feel safe and whole when he was small.
It's been a while : his mind is so clear. The boy can see all the things that are here even if he doesn't focus on them. The song he hums doesn't let go, still in his mind but the others thoughts, other songs, writing ideas, FEELINGS, lives in peace with others. And it's just like that, no need to force himself to feel by trying to read books, by trying to do things that used to work to calm himself or hide or just feel a little better about life.
The Mike in the dream, the true Mike, is progressing peacefully toward a village. He is near, he is sure of it, but the drift of decor is so soft he senses it by intuition alone at first. It's just natural, a little sound of happyness, a little shift in light and the natural path made by a small forest with autums notes opens on a hill, and there is a river, a mill and a bridge just accross it. The sky is everywhere and Mike can be part of his universe. A number that fits in a equation. He has a purpose, he knows it : he has a mission to carry and he is able to do it cause it's who he is. A brave knight. Not the fancy one all made of gold and glory, a knight thats nice, available to the common people. He doesnt search for fame, he's only eager to fulfill his own quest : to be always true to his heart and to protect those that need protection, even the underserving that have good people who cares about them. Helping people is a part of him as the sword is a part of his body since he pledged his vows to her. The words were engraved on the steel of the blade and inside the sheath. When the sword with no name rested still and at home against his chest, this was the place she belonged, the sentence was whole : the chaos and the order. It was better when he didn't use it. When the sword was colored with blood, no one could decifers the words and the light inside the sheath was dark as sadness, unwelcoming and sorrowful, like their wasn't a ying and a yang that balanced the world anymore.
He could rest in the village and find a work when in the inn. Even a team of willing fellows that enjoy soft wine and heartful song could be in there, who knows ? Small laughs linguered in the air, a child runs right past him, just a brush of silk against his light armure, and a stall of legume trembles, fruits falling with a joyful sound when a malicious dog try to get one : he succeed in catching it on the ground and the stand owner does'nt get mad, he laughs with the dog owner and doesn't ever get mad.
Mike knew he will find his crew in this village, at the same place they always are, around a round table, with an empty chair that awaits him. Here and forever they are playing, arguing, making campains and sciences projects or just, being : they belong together and are safe to rest in their own little worlds. A long journey was ahead but it was worth fighting for. Friendship, warm yellow of a smile and eyes gently learning him through his own for the thousands of time : that's what he wants. He is not a lonely knight and he deserves a little bit of sun to find courage in his noble pursuit. Even if it's small and at the back of his head, he remembers pain fairly well, and he knows now his desire to love and be loved doesn't lead to pain, it's the only cure to pain that exists. Nothing can be as right as blue, his color, and yellow, the color of his love, because it makes green and green is grass, green is life, green is the sacred temple of nature. When blue meets yellow it is just as normal as walking on the earth, the hue of grass is the more nuanced color hue that the human eyes can detect after all, because they are accustom to it since the begining of time, it's how he survives in the wild. Gravity, ground, exists for a reason : gravity exists so people can't be totally lost, feet steady on the solid green.
And Mike thought he knows where his north was : right here waiting in this inn.
He was slowly forgetting that this world, this dream, has no rules, no logics, no north and the gravity was all wrong.