Chapter Text
Ena stood frozen for several moments, staring at the door. Every nerve in her body was screaming at her to move.
Move, damn it!!
Go after them!
But she doesn’t. Her head was spinning—everything is, really. She almost forgot how to breathe. Her hands were still taking, fingers were still clammy, and her heart was still pounding way too fast to be normal.
She walked defeatedly back into the storage room. She sunk into the ground against the wall and buried her hand in her face.
She had no choice but to leave for today.
~~~~~
The next day eventually rolled around. It’s a surprisingly slow day, but Ena still chose to come in a bit after closing to hand deliver some sort of present wrapped in a box with a frilly pink ribbon. She still had a key to the shop that Yuuki completely forgot she gave her, so she used it and walked to the back room.
She spotted Mizuki typing away on their laptop, not noticing that they have company. Ena noticed that Yuuki for some reason is still not there.
“I guess Yuuki is still sick.” Ena said as she plopped the present down on Mizuki’s laptop, causing it to shut on their fingers.
“Ow– What–What are you doing here?”
“I have a gift for you.”
“...I can tell.”
For a moment, neither of them spoke.
Then Ena finally said something.
“Are you gonna open it?”
“I was a bit busy–”
Ena slammed her hands on the desk and leaned forward.
“Yeah, was. Open it.”
Mizuki glared at her and hesitated before slowly unwrapping the package, their fingers glazing over the ribbon, almost as they were taking in every detail of the pink fabric.
“The packaging is a bit… much.” They tried to come up with a negative remark but they both knew Mizuki secretly loved it.
Eventually, they took the lid off and put it to the side. There seemed to be tissue paper covering some sort of clothing piece? They tore through it and froze. It was a dress. A dress they always wanted when they were a teenager but never got around to buying it.
They held it up so the top half was visible.
“It’s…”
Ena watched Mizuki stare at the dress, their expression hard to read. Her chest couldn’t help but ache at the sight as she watched Mizuki’s fingers tremble slightly as they gingerly touched the soft fabric, but Ena kept her stance, eyes never leaving their face as she studied it for any reaction.
Silence filled the small office again.
Then finally, Mizuki whispered, almost too quiet to hear:
“You… You remembered…”
Ena bit her lip, forcing herself to not move and comfort them as soon as she heard the shakiness in their voice.
“Of course I remember.”
Mizuki broke. They started sobbing–hard, their stoic mask falling again.
They kept repeating themself over and over again while fully taking the dress out of the box and digging their face in it. Ena could see all the true emotion spilling out of them, the years of bottling up who they really were finally coming back out.
Ena felt the tears start first. It was a sharp, hot sting behind her eyes that she quickly tried to blink away but ultimately failed.
Her chest had hurt so much as she looked at her former best friend, the person who was replaced by a shadow that happened to share the same name and she thinks about how maybe–just maybe–she could save Mizuki after all.
Seeing them cry like this… so open and loud and… vulnerable.
Her control snapped.
Ena ran around the desk and threw herself at Mizuki in a hug, holding them as tightly as she could.
“You idiot–” Her voice broke and her shoulders trembled against them. “God, you stupid freaking idiot…”
Her fingers curled in their shirt, holding them as if they might disappear again and she laughed. It’s wet and cracked and incredibly random but she couldn’t help herself.
Right as she was going to say something Mizuki interrupted her.
“Ena…” Mizuki softly pushed Ena away, their hands still stuffed with the fabric of the dress.
“I don’t think I can take this.”
Ena stumbled at the sudden distance. Her stomach drops.
“What?!”
It took a massive amount of effort to keep her voice steady–to not let the words crack under the sheer weight of her fear that Mizuki is slipping away again.
“What do you mean, you don’t think you can take it?!”
“I..I don’t know if I can do it again.”
They looked down at the dress with pure yearning.
“I… I want to. I need to… but I can’t.”
Ena’s eyes went wide, then narrow. She moved before she could realize it, gripping Mizuki’s jaw and forcing them to look at her.
Her voice was a sharp, low whisper.
“Please, Mizuki… stop this bullshit right now. You are not running away again. Not from me or yourself. I won’t let you.”
“I don’t know. What if everyone hates me again? They… they wouldn’t if I were just normal, Ena. How shitty of a person am I if I go ahead and change myself again… What about Rui and Toya and An? Toya and An were the first people who I recognized when I got to the airport from France– and they both recognized me too! They wanted to talk to me probably to catch up or just to say hi–and I walked away! I looked right at both of them and still chose to leave… And Rui–He tried so hard to talk to me when he first saw me and I just shut him down. Can you believe that? The friend I’ve known the longest just dismissed like that. Because of me. Because I chose to do that. God, I’m such a shitty person… Ena, I can’t… do it.”
There was another unbearable pause as Ena let Mizuki collect themself and she takes in all the information they just laid out for them.
“You’re not a shitty person,” Ena finally spoke. Her words were sharp and rough with a hint of desperation. “You’re scared. I understand…”
She moved her hand up to Mizuki’s cheek.
“I get that it would probably be easier to just… hide away and hope everything goes away. You know I get it but…”
She breathed in.
“That’s not living.”
Mizuki looked up at Ena, both pairs of their teary eyes finally meeting.
“The Mizuki I knew? They were an annoying little shit who never gave a damn what others thought. The Mizuki I remember was loud and obnoxious and frankly a bit annoying…” She chuckled. “...But they were true to themself.
Just… Please stop apologizing for being a person. You are so much better than that…”
Mizuki pulled Ena back in and hugged her. It was a bit of an awkward angle as they were sitting down in their stupid office chair and Ena was standing in front of them, so Ena was kind of leaning forward and hugging their head, but it was too much of an emotional moment for her to say anything.
They let out a cry. A cry full of hope, guilt, fear, and acceptance.
Ena just held on—wrapping both arms around them as tightly as she could and buried her face into her arms against Mizuki’s head. She could feel every shudder, every breath, every broken wail that ripped out of Mizuki like it was tearing through her too. And for once, she didn’t try to stop crying.
“I’ve got you… I’ve got you…”
Over and over again—like a promise she was trying so hard to secure.
They stayed like that for a long time. Mizuki was still crying—finally crying the way they’ve needed to for years—as they clung to Ena’s shirt like it’s saving them from drowning again.
Ena just held on, her breaths uneven. Her own tears soaked into Mizuki’s shoulder. She doesn’t care that Yuuki might stop by and see them in this intimate moment. That’s the last thing she cares about right now.
Let the world see. Let them know that Mizuki is here. That they’re back, finally back.
Again, the room was filled with an unbearable silence.
“Ena… can you help me try the dress on…?”
Ena pulls away, her back hurting a bit from leaning into the hug for so long.
“Of—Of course… if you’re comfortable with me helping you, that is.”
“Yeah, that’s fine…”
Ena helped Mizuki out of their jacket and shirt so that they’re just awkwardly standing in front of her. Ena could feel her throat tighten as she carefully slips the dress onto their slender figure. Her touch was light as she pulled the fabric over their shoulders and down their chest and zip up the back. They took their slacks off under the dress so the waistline of them didn’t interfere with the dress.
Ena didn’t speak, just ran her hands lightly over Mizuki’s waist. The soft material and the smooth curve of their hips made her thoughts stutter for a moment.
She finally pulled away.
“Look at me,” She whispered.
Mizuki turned around, clearly nervous about what they looked like.
For a moment, Ena just stared. Her eyes raked over every perfect inch of Mizuki, the way the dress hugged the curves of their body, the way the soft fabric seemed to glow against their skin…
And her chest ached.
She took a shaky breath and stepped forward. Her fingers curled lightly around Mizuki’s hips.
“You’re… beautiful…”
“…Am I?”
Mizuki tried to laugh the comment off but there was a noticeable touch of doubt if they even deserved this, but the doubt was mixed with genuine wonder if they actually looked good.
Ena tightened her fingers and swallowed hard, feeling her own expression soften at the vulnerability in that quiet question.
“Gosh, yeah… So beautiful…” She murmured, her thumb traced along the waistline.
“I wouldn’t lie to you.” Her gaze meets theirs. “How could I, seeing you like this? Looking like… this?”
Slowly, as if she didn’t even realize she was doing it, her hand lifted from Mizuki’s hips to their chest, her hand resting on their heart.
Just then, the bell for the door jingled. It was Yuuki.
“Mizuki? You here? Oh please don’t tell me you left already…”
Yuuki walked into the back room, no makeup on and still very clearly sick. Ena and Mizuki barely had enough time to separate into a friendly distance before Yuuki could see them.
Mizuki is first to say something as Yuuki paused in the doorway.
“Yuuki…”
Immediately, Yuuki broke down into tears and hugged Mizuki, the sudden rush of emotion hit Ena like a wave as she stumbled back, her hands already missing the feel of Mizuki’s waist.
Yuuki continued to sob, still clinging onto Mizuki with everything she had.
“I thought—I thought I lost the real you… I didn’t know if you’d ever come back to me…”
Yuuki pulled back, tears streaming down her face as she held Mizuki at arms length. Her eyes darted all over them as she took in the dress and the obvious signs of crying. Her eyes drift to Ena, still watching with tears in her eyes.
“And you… you…”
Ena’s throat tightened again. But she’s seen the way Yuuki’s gaze had softened. There’s no anger, no judgement, no disappointment. Just hope.
Mizuki started to turn away, suddenly very self conscious.
“I…”
Yuuki’s grip tightened on their shoulders.
“You look amazing, sis.”
After the short reunion, Yuuki picked up some papers and left, not before hugging Ena goodbye. It was once again just Mizuki and Ena. Alone.
The silence was thick and heavy. Ena felt it settle against her skin like a weight that was almost suffocating. She was still silently crying, though it was significantly less than a few minutes ago.
“It’s getting late. You should go home,” Mizuki said to Ena while running their fingers along the seam of the dress.
“And leave you here?”
“I mean, yeah…”
“No way. Come on, I’ll help you out of the dress and we can leave together.”
“All right…”
Ena helped Mizuki unzip the dress and she steps out to give them a bit of privacy. After a couple of minutes, they opened the door to talk out, dress shoved hastily back into the box in one hand, suitcase in the other.
“...Shall we go?”
Ena looked at them and smiled as she helped them carry the box.
“Yeah…”
Mizuki turned off the light as Ena walked out the door. They followed her out and locked the door behind them. They both walked down the street into the evening night
A few moments passed by. Mizuki was unfortunately still a bit closed off, but it would eventually pass over. Or… so Ena hoped.
“So… Kanade and Mafuyu still make music? I… I still checked out the Niigo channel and I would still see some uploads every now and then. I noticed though that most of the songs now have blank thumbnails and videos so I assume you don’t work with them as much.”
“Oh… Uhm, y-yeah. Yeah I get kinda busy with other stuff pretty often so it just seemed like the best choice to step away from the group. Sometimes they’ll manage to get me when I’m not really working on bigger projects so rarely there’ll be an actual video. But even then it’s just a still image. That’s how it’s been since…”
Her voice drifted off. Mizuki caught what she was trying to say and looked away.
“But uhm… Yeah–Mafuyu’s trying to become a nurse so that’s why she isn’t able to write much, and Kanade’s managed to work with some bigger artists too, so her time is also pretty occupied. But everyone still tries to keep the music going, haha…”
“...That’s nice.”
Ena noticed that Mizuki became a bit distracted, looking at something on the other side of the street. She followed their gaze to spot a familiar looking pair of guys…who seemed to be… looking at them also? Wait–why were they looking at Mizuki and Ena?
Ena tried to figure out who the guys were and why they were looking at her and Mizuki when it clicked in her head. It’s two of those same guys who were on the rooftop that day. For a moment she was impressed at how she was able to remember their faces after so long before she turned to Mizuki who… was shaking silently while staring at the ground. It’s then that Ena finally paid attention to what the guys were actually saying.
“Oh my god do you remember when we saw them on the rooftop back in school? That brown-haired chick was totally shocked when we told her the truth.”
“Haha! Yeah and Akiyama totally had a breakdown after we exposed ‘em… He was so sad and for what? Guy like him shoulda known what was coming.”
“I mean he seems to have gone back to normal… Finally. He was such a weird faggot.”
As the guys erupted in laughter, Ena’s face twisted into annoyance and then pure rage. She was so close to crossing the street and going up to them before she felt Mizuki tug on her arm.
“Don’t talk to them. It’s okay. Just… calm down.”
Ena sensed the distress in Mizuki’s tone.
“Calm down? What do you mean calm down?”
“I mean calm down. Let’s just… Let’s keep going. Your place isn’t too far, is it?”
“No… it’s not.”
Wait. MY PLACE. Oh shit I forgot to tell them about Akito… eh, it probably won’t matter.
“My place is a few buildings away…”
She looks back across the street to find the guys have already left.
Gone to some sleazy bar, probably…
There was a brief moment of silence
Eventually, Ena stopped in front of a building.
“This is it.”
Ena unlocked the door and stepped aside for Mizuki to enter. After a moment of silence she looked up to see Mizuki walking away.
“Wha—Where are you going? You weren’t going to stay?”
“You… wanted me to stay?”
Ena got flustered. Mizuki never said they would come inside so why would she have expected them to?
“You—Don’t—Tea…?”
“...What?”
Ena grimaced as she tried to casually invite Mizuki in but failed.
“Do you… want tea?”
“Uh… Sure… Why not.”
Ena stood awkwardly by the door as she let Mizuki in. She turned the electric kettle on and brought Mizuki to her room.
“Wha—Why are we going to your room?—“
“—Shh.”
“…Don’t you live alone? Why do I have to be—“
“Neighbors are weird.”
“…Okay…”
Mizuki shuffled behind Ena to her room before they sat on her bed. Ena closed the door behind them and stood there, staring at her.
“...Didn’t you say you wanted to make me tea?…—I think the kettle’s done…”
Ena didn’t say anything. Instead, she ran forward and grabbed Mizuki, pulling them towards her in a hug and then a kiss.
It was rushed and messy, their teeth clacking for a second, before Mizuki pulled away.
“What the hell?!”
Mizuki practically screamed that, making Ena flinch back and stare at the floor.
“Why… why would you do that…?”
Ena didn’t meet their gaze before, only now as she heard the shakiness in their voice did she look up.
“I… I thought you… We… We had something…”
“Had something? I… We… I don’t know what to say…”
The anger in Mizuki’s voice very quickly shifted into hurt.
“...I didn’t know you saw me like that, Ena.”
“I’ve always seen you like that.”
Mizuki gasped softly when they heard that. Ena still didn’t look up.
“...Why?...”
“How could I not? You were… my best friend… And you were so perfect… And… And I lost you–”
Mizuki started to feel angry again.
“I lied to you. And then I left. How–Why do you still lov–like me after I left you?!”
“Because you were everything to me!” Ena blurted out.
They both froze and sat silently. Mizuki was going to get up to leave—
The door swung open.