Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Vic stops him before he can run after Robert, but she doesn't say a word. It's Diane who speaks up first - “I think he needs to calm down first pet.”

“I don't wanna leave him alone.” - answers Aaron.

“He'll be fine for ten minutes. Come with me. I make us a brew.” - said Vic - “I'm worried about him.” - she added as they walked towards her house.

Me too thought Aaron, but he only nodded in response. Liv went back to the pub with Diane, so Aaron didn't have to worry that Liv might pick a fight with him. He knew both of them, it would've happened.

“He's driving himself mad.” - said Vic sitting down, tea in her hand. Aaron didn't remember when she made it. How long did he sit on this couch? He zoned out thinking of Robert, he lost track of time. Eventually he took the mug Vic was offering and gave her a weak smile.

“He hasn't been sleeping.” - he said looking into the mug - “And he refused to give up hope....to see sense basically. I...I don't know Vic. Sometimes he scares me.” - Vic just listened to him but at the last sentence she gave Aaron a confused look - “Not physically, mentally. I'm worried about his state of mind. This obsession with finding Rebecca....and I get it, I know why it is so important to him. I understand him, but....he's taking this too far.”

“Did he bring up mum?”

“Yeah. And even if he didn't I knew it. I know him Vic!” - he said as he placed the mug on the table before he buried his head in his hands.

“Hey, he's gonna be alright. My brother....you know how he can be. But we're there for him. He's gonna get through this.” - she said patting his shoulder.

“I know.” - he answered taking a deep breath. - “It's just...seeing him like that. Ever since I came home....he's broken Vic. He's vulnerable, and I just want to....”

“You want him to be okay.” - she finished his thought.

“It's not like he's not talking about it, he does. With me anyway, but....”

“He's stubborn.” - smiled Vic - “Just like someone else I know.” - she grinned.

“What a perfect match.” - laughed Aaron. It was bittersweet.

“You are! Are you having doubts?”

“No, course not. I just hate this whole situation. I can't help him. He's on edge. I just...maybe it would be the best if the police found her. At least he would have some kind of closure. That's the only way he can move on. And I'm not even blaming him.” - he said looking in front of him. - “Thanks Vic, for the chat and everything, but....”

“I get it you wanna get home to him.”

“Yeah.” - he smiled.

“Give him a big hug, and try to calm him down. I know it's hard but he's gonna come through.”

“Will do.” - he sighed as he stood up. - “Thanks.” - he said again before she let him out.

On his short way home he bumped into Liv and Diane. They were sitting outside the pub, and they called him over as soon as they saw him.

“You're going home?” - asked Liv.

“Yeah, listen, do you mind...”

“No, I stay here for a bit.” - she said

“Thanks, it's just, I wanna talk to him.” - he said looking at his sister. He saw Diane giving him a sympathetic smile.

“He has to finish this behaviour.” - she said.

“He can't, that's the point.” - said Aaron quickly. - “I understand him, it's hard, and … he doesn't wanna let down Seb.”

“Seb?” - asked Diane. Aaron looked at her thinking how strange that she can't see the reason behind Robert's actions.

His mouth was already open, ready to answer but Liv beat him to it. - “He doesn't want him growing up without a mum, does he.” - she said to Diane.

“Of course!” - she said like she just remembered, but it's not something people just forget. Robert has many issues and he wasn't sure Diane knows about any of them.

“I gotta go.” - he said. - “Just give us an hour okay?” - he looked at Liv.

“I can watch Seb for the night if you want.” - offered Diane.

“Thanks but, Robert wants him close, and honestly so do I.” - he said before he left them to come home to Robert. He hoped that he calmed down a bit, they were due to an emotional chat, and he didn't want to do it with an angry Robert.

He took a big breath before he opened the door.

Chapter Text

"Have you calmed down yet?" - he asked when he saw his husband sitting in the kitchen. He just finished feeding Seb, who was in his happy bubble without a care. He was seated in his high chair, and thank god he didn't pick up on any stress his father's got.

"I don't need to calm down!" - he snapped. - "They... they really think she's dead... THEY DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO FIND HER!" - he shouted while he stood up. He started walking up and down and Aaron just watched him worried.

"Robert, the police out there looking for her...."

"Yes...For her body..... THEY THINK SHE'S DEAD ALREADY!" - his voice was still full of anger, and finally it got to Seb as well. The little boy started pouting before the first teardrops appeared.

"You scare him!" - said Aaron stepping to Seb to pick him up.

"Give him here."

"No, you need to calm yourself down. I won't have you near him otherwise." - said Aaron in a low tone. - "Ssshh it's okay Seb." - he whispered to him as he bounced him up and down. Seb fisted his little hand in Aaron's shirt, and slowly the crying stopped. Robert sat down in the meantime, looking at them. His family.

"I'm sorry." - he said with an apologetic look. - "I didn't mean to...."

"I know." - answered Aaron – "But you see why you need to give it a rest? You always say it's for Seb... well think about him! He's sensing all this tension, and it's not doing him any good."

"You're right, but I need to find his mum Aaron! You know why it's important! You understand me right?" - asked Robert with a frightened look – "Say you understand it."

"Of course I do." - he said as he got closer to Robert. He reached his hand to stroke his cheek. Seb was quiet and when Aaron looked at him he saw his eyes closing. - "Look at him." - he smiled. - "I take him upstairs, then we'll have a chat."

"Okay." - said Robert. Aaron nodded then headed to Seb's room. He knew that Robert regretted the whole shouting, and scaring Seb. But he was exhausted, and he wasn't thinking straight. That's why Aaron's the one putting Seb to bed tonight, and that's why he gave him an extra cuddle before he left the room. To let him know that everything's okay. He settled the boy in five minutes then went back to Robert. He was on the sofa.

"Right." - started Aaron. - "Robert, that shrine..."

"Don't even start. I know I shouldn't have done it, but.... I got... so angry! They all think she's dead and nobody's trying to help me find her. It's like they don't even care! And what will I tell Seb when he's older? “Sorry kid that's life?”  I.... I cannot face him, knowing that I let him down!"- he cried.

"But Robert, it has to be another way. This.... it's not good for any of us! Do you want another scene like the one before? Where Seb's crying because he's got scared?" - he asked sitting next to him.

"I didn't mean to scare him. I love him... you know I love him. I'd do anything for him!"

"I know Robert. Why don't you focus on him a bit? I'm not saying you should give up, but just take a break! You need to be responsible, and reasonable."

"Aaron Dingle using big words..."

"It's not funny Robert! Don't try to make a joke out of it."

"I know." - he said looking into Aaron's eyes. - "And I'm sorry for everything. But I won't give up. If there's a tiny little chance... I have to believe in it, right? For Seb."

"Alright." - said Aaron finally. There was no point in trying to reason with him. He knew that. - "Why don't we make it an early night?"

"Can you give me a hug first?" - Aaron just shook his head bit before he opened his arms and let Robert pull him close. They didn't stay like that for long. Aaron leaned back dragging Robert down with him. He let him lie on top of him, while he stroked his hair. Neither of them said a word. They didn't have to. But Aaron knew that Robert's gonna be back with his craziness soon enough. At least he has a quiet moment now. He was sure that nothing would come from his early night idea, but for now he got Robert settled. Even if it was for only ten minutes.