Ilhja



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    "I'm so very glad," the Suez Canal said, acidly, "that we're doing this live. How convenient that we have minute-by-minute GPS updates so the whole world can see exactly how bad your aim is."

    "There's no need for personal attacks," the Ever Given said with forced patience. "It's not like I did this on purpose."

    "So fucking around and drawing a dick and balls in the Red Sea, that was, what, top-notch professional steering?"

    "That was foreplay."

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    09 Mar 2023

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    The AU Farmer Daddy Steve and Bucky story.

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    16 Feb 2023

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    MARRIED?”

    “Basically married. Permanently engaged anyway. Weres have their own deal.” Natasha sounds much, much too gleeful about Steve’s rapidly expanding personal hell. “So you better wake your blushing bride and tell him the happy news: that it was an accident and you had no idea what you were doing.”

    “I,” Steve says, strangled. “I can’t do that!”

    “You can’t?”

    “He thought I was proposing! And he accepted!”

    “Wow, maybe he’s just as dumb as you are,” Natasha says thoughtfully.

    “I can’t just promise him a ring, take him home, drink from him three times in a row and then wake him up the next morning to say oops, just kidding!” Steve casts around, looking at his wreck of an apartment. “I don’t even have any good champagne!”

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    13 Sep 2022

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    The mission resets abruptly, from objective: kill to objective: protect

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    30 Jun 2022

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    “I think I’m gonna have to hurt some people,” Steve Rogers says, voice tight with rage. The asset assumes that will be him, then laughs at himself for the thought.

    He’s not people.

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    13 Nov 2020