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You’ll Be the Death of Me by venusenvvvy
Fandoms: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Deadpool - All Media Types
06 Jun 2019
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Summary
“Oh my god, it’s the tie, isn’t it?” Peter whisper-yelled, struggling to get his orange tie off. “MJ said it’d go well with the blue suit but I shouldn’t have listened her - oh my god, I look like I’m about to graduate from the fifth grade!”
Wade snorted rather loudly at that - because, honestly? Peter was right. With his boyish complexion, light brown curls mopped on his head, too small navy blue suit, top button done up, and napkin hat placed on his head, he really did look like a kid on picture day. Still, Wade stood and leaned across the table and grabbed his hand, placing a soft kiss on his knuckles through the fabric of his suit. “I think you look great, okay?”
Peter turned bright red, pointedly choosing to ignore the flattery and burying his nose in the menu as Wade sat down again.
“Anyway, it’s probably me they’re staring at anyway.”
“Because you’re a known murderer dressed in BDSM gear?”
Wade chuckled - two could play at that game. “Because I’m a known murderer dressed in BDSM gear on a date with a fifth grader.”
Peter Parker and Wade Wilson go out on their first date... disaster and hilarity ensue.
[Direct sequel to “Oh, You Know It Katana Boy”]
Series
- Part 2 of Cancel the Cab
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Oh, You Know It Katana Boy by venusenvvvy for andouilles
Fandoms: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Deadpool - All Media Types
27 Mar 2019
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Summary
Is that Deadpool? Totally awesome! In an ‘oh shit, I hope he’s here for me’ kind of way. Peter rolled his eyes, making his way behind the counter and putting on an apron while the other employees ran outside and (presumably) called the police. Without clocking out. Great! Amateurs. I mean, Jesus H Christ, this is Queens for fucks sake! I mean, don’t take the graveyard shift if you can’t handle the sight of a body. Or multiple.
Peter didn’t respond as he clocked everybody out and himself in before he got in shit, then slowly made his way to the front counter, casting a defeated look at the corpse splayed across it. Deadpool’s grin faltered.
“This your katana?” Peter asked dully although he didn’t need to, gesturing to the katana pierced through the corpse’s mouth and into the counter. Deadpool nodded earnestly, silent for once. “Please collect it.”
“Why can’t you?”
“I’ve lived in New York for my entire life, went through the whole ass public school system, plus university, and I only ever learned three things of value: never go to New Jersey unless you’re on crack, if you ever see a rat, scream at it until you can’t see it anymore - and don’t touch somebody else’s murder weapon.”
Series
- Part 1 of Cancel the Cab
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Nothing's Gonna Hurt Me With My Eyes Shut by vintagerogers
Fandoms: Marvel, Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
25 Apr 2016
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Summary
"'Friend of mine told me I couldn't stop a table saw with my hand," he says, like it's nothing, and Peter recoils. "Turns out he was right."
Or, the one where they meet for the first time outside the nurse's office.
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Summary
Peter wasn’t a stranger to rejection. In fact, this was his year.
Obligatory symbiote fic. Boy meets alien. An accompaniment to @ask-spiderpool on Tumblr!
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Pulitzer-Prize Winning Nudes by sciderman
Fandoms: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Deadpool - All Media Types
08 May 2023
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Summary
“Baby boy’s first nudes.” Wade whispered, raising the phone like it were something sacred. “What an honor.”