Chapter Text
To have an inner voice that was totally different from you was weird, but to have an inner voice that also supported you with your one–sided love was weirder. Genos never thought he’d be in such a position, but there he was, hearing SG give him advice on “how to seduce a man who has no clue about love”.
The current situation started almost two months ago, when Dr. Kuseno had the brilliant idea of installing a new update on him, which was SG, an artificial intelligence that would help him as a program on whatever problem he could have, and it seemed as if love was also included in it. He was starting to regret saying yes to the doctor’s suggestion.
“I’m only saying that you should probably be more direct when you try to show him how you feel. That man has no clue about what’s going on in your head as I do, don’t you get that? Seriously, Genos, think about it” , said the voice while he was cleaning the dishes left after dinner.
A dinner shared with his teacher. A lovely dinner with lovely candles and lovely flowers set on the table and a romantic atmosphere, which Saitama passed completely by.
“That was a great dinner as always, Genos” he had said, patting his shoulder and then going to the bathroom to take a shower, completely oblivious of Genos' seducing skills.
“He can be the strongest human on Earth, hell even the Universe, but you have to admit that he’s a bit– no, a huge dumb when it comes to love.”
—Don’t call him dumb—, replied Genos by instinct, then sighed—. It’s because Saitama-sensei sees me as a student, almost as a friend. His intelligence is unbelievable.
“I was just about to say the same thing.”
Genos frowned, stopping what he was doing. He was really tired from this sarcastic voice, always saying bad things about his master, treating him as if he was stupid when he, of course, wasn’t. On the contrary, Saitama-sensei always told him quotes that would help him in battle and make him feel as a real human being. Genos was so grateful for him, for everything he’s done for his sake; however, the love he felt was beyond admiration and friendship, he knew that for sure, thought about it for months and decided to make a move at the very first chance he could have, but before he could do that, a monster had appeared and destroyed almost his entire body, so he had to wait for a whole week to see him again. Even so, he couldn't make a move at first; SG was now with him and obviously realized his feelings for his sensei as soon as he saw him and his system started to go highwire.
Dr. Kuseno should’ve told him about the program being almost like a big brother who would bother him because of his crush. He wasn't ready at all for that thing to laugh at him when his teacher received him at the front door and many thoughts came to his mind at once, thoughts about how handsome and lovely and friendly his teacher was. So, of course, SG laughed and he was so surprised he almost turned around to see if there was someone else in the room, but then the charismatic SG told him it was it, the program. Saitama-sensei had looked at him as if he did something weird so he calmed himself down, doing as if nothing had happened.
So his teacher knew nothing about this problem and Genos wanted to keep it like that like, forever, if he could. Talking about the program without remembering the jokes about his unreciprocated love was absolutely impossible and would be so embarrassing that he didn’t feel ready to deal with it yet. He sighed.
“Can you stop sighing and finish the goddamn dishes so we can wait for him on his bed and finally tell him you want him to draw you as one of his french girls?”
Deciding to ignore the voice for the fifth time that day he continued to wash what was left and took off his apron when finished, sitting in front of the TV while waiting for his teacher to finish his relaxing bath –which Genos also decorated with candles so he could relax as much as possible–, and hoping he would finally get a clue.
“You do know there’s 0.5% a chance that’s gonna happen, don’t you.”
—Shut up.
—I didn’t even say anything—, a playful voice said behind his back and Genos jumped a bit from the surprise, relaxing as soon as he saw it was Saitama, but then tensing again as he realized that his teacher thought he told him to “shut up”.
—I was talking to myself!—, he screamed. It wasn’t technically a lie, but he still felt bad for not telling him the entire truth.
—It’s okay, dude. Chillax—, he said while smiling and looking for his pajamas in the closet, which gave him the chance to admire his perfect body.
“Yeah, “admire”. More like “eat with the eyes” lol.”
Did the program just say “ lol ”? Whatever, he didn't want to waste his time thinking about it, better to focus on his teacher.
—Was the bath relaxing, Saitama–sensei?—, he asked with his hands in fists firmly on his knees, excited to hear the answer, hopefully with something else that could give him a clue if his methods worked.
—Oh, yeah, sure—, he answered while putting on the shirt—. Thanks for the candles by the way, it was a nice detail.
Even though his face showed no emotion at all as he replied “You’re welcome, sensei”, he was totally screaming on the inside and SG laughing as loud as it could, trying to say “told you so” in between, but failing. How was it possible for it to laugh in his head he didn’t know, but in his next visit to the doctor he would make sure to ask him to remove that.
Moving to the side he grabbed the futon and settled everything so they could sleep, all the time while still screaming internally, cursing his poor seducing skills and promising himself he would try harder next time. Maybe he should buy him that coat he saw him looking at a clothing shop window, and add a card with a nice and romantic quote with it.
“Oooor maybe you should just straight tell him! Haha, got the joke? Straight? No?”
He sighed.
“It was a good one, you’re just too serious and have bad humor.”
Saitama yawned, stretching his arms up over his head and showing a bit of his stomach. Genos quickly looked to the other side, feeling a bit of steam leave his body.
—I’m really worn out and can barely feel my legs, you going to sleep yet?—, his teacher asked, and he immediately nodded—. Then good night, Genos—, he said while yawning again and making himself comfortable in the futon. Genos rapidly did the same.
—Good night, Saitama–sensei—. he replied softly, hearing the already calm and steady breathing of his teacher.
“So, you ready for a boys chat ‘bout how to catch a man?”
Genos closed his eyes and wondered if it would be that terrible to hurt himself and blame the program so it could be removed.
Better to shut down for the night and fix everything in the morning.