Chapter Text
Adam smiled up at Ronan who stood awkwardly by the bed. He’d really thought nothing passed his matching bracelets line.
“You can sit, you know.” Adam gestured to the chair beside the bed. Ronan glanced at the door and rubbed his hand across the back of his shaved head. “Gansey told you I wanted to see you?”
Ronan frowned, “Gansey and I, well, our conversations haven’t been very long recently,” he confessed. “But you wanted to see me?”
“I always want to see you.” Adam confessed without thinking. His words caught up with him and he flushed bright red, His colour enhanced by his white surroundings. Ronan couldn’t help but smile in response. “Why are you and Gansey not talking?” Adam frowned, trying to change the subject.
“I got a little bit drunk the other day. He wasn’t very happy about it. He called Blue and sent us out on a walk this morning so she could chew me out. I’m meant to be at lunch with them right now.”
“Blue’s here too?” Adam perked up at this news.
“No doubt she’ll be here soon.” Ronan mumbled. Adam winced slightly, and placed his a hand on his wrist. “Does it hurt?”
Adam shrugged, “itches more than hurts, I guess.” Ronan sighed and finally took the seat beside the bed. He and Adam sat in silence, both churning over what they wanted to tell the other in their own heads.
When Ronan never showed for lunch, Blue and Gansey assumed he was sulking. Blue was determined to let him sulk. Gansey was excited to spend time alone with Blue, but also had a plan to look for him whilst Blue visited Adam. Blue and Gansey went to an Indian restaurant for lunch.
“I missed you,” Gansey confessed once they’d ordered their food and drinks. Blue smirked at him.
“You were only gone a few days!” She rolled her eyes at him. “Gosh, I wish I’d known you were so clingy, I’d have stuck with Adam.”
“Take that back, or I’ll make you pay for lunch.”
“Gladly.” Blue smirked as the waiter arrived with their drinks. Blue took a sip of hers as Gansey laughed at her. Their lunch was relaxed. It was the perfect haven that Gansey needed in between dealing with Ronan and the perfect reward for Blue after her spat with Ronan. It allowed her to breathe before she went to Adam.
Gansey insisted on walking with Blue to the hospital doors. As she turned to enter through the doors, he tugged at her hand and pulled her into a kiss. Blue rolled her eyes but her cheeks flushed.
“Go find Ronan, make sure he’s not destroying anything too expensive.” She told him as she pulled away again and entered the hospital doors. Blue strolled passed the vacant reception desk and headed to Adam’s room, following the directions Gansey had given her at lunch.
Ronan and Adam still sat in silence as Blue pulled back the curtain.
“Surpri- oh.” She took in Ronan’s glare and Adam’s look of shock. Adam’s face slowly turned to a grin. “Ronan, Gansey’s looking for you and I want to talk to Adam in private anyway.”
“You can’t kick me out.” Ronan grumbled.
“I won’t have to, I’ll just tell someone you’re not family.” Blue retorted.
“Neither are you.”
“What do you mean?” Blue asked innocently, “Adam’s my brother.”
Adam made a face. “Um, actually, Gansey already used that one, he said we were twins. That would make your boyfriend your brother too.” Blue pouted. “It’s okay, Ronan. Will you come back later?” Ronan nodded and stood up, he almost bent down to kiss Adam goodbye before remembering that they were broken up and he could no longer do that.
Blue waited until Ronan left the room before she threw herself into the chair.
“What the fuck, Parrish?” Adam opened his mouth to defend himself but Blue held up her hand to silence him, and because it was Blue, he was quiet. “No call, no text, not even a hint that things were this bad. How much shit do we have to go through for you to tell us you need help? Did you think about me? Gansey? What do you need? And don’t even think of bullshitting me. We are here, all of us. You are not a burden, you are not a chore. We love you and we are going to care for you, God help me if it’s the last thing we do.” For a second, Adam said nothing as Blue stared at him expectantly.
The honesty came through, first as a drip, then a flood. Adam told Blue how he’d started drinking with some of They Crying Club on nights out. It made him feel good, made him forget things and made him sleep. It didn’t matter that he’d have a hangover the next day, it was a minor consequence. He missed Ronan, they spoke every day but it wasn’t the same to him, over summers and holidays, he’d gotten used to waking up in Ronan’s arms every morning and their life at The Barns, he felt lost without it. A few weeks ago, Adam’s mother had shown up. She’d caught the train and was waiting for him outside class one Wednesday. One of Adam’s friends had seen her. It hadn’t taken long for Robert to show up and convince her to go home with him. He spat at Adam as he turned to leave. That was the last time Adam had seen his Mother alive Then the police had gone to Adam’s dorm and everyone knew by now, how much he had lied about his family. He caught a few of them giving him the same pitying looks the school nurse at Aglionby gave, the same looks the admin office gave him when his tuition fees were paid at the very last minute. Adam knew drinking would help him forget so he went out for dinner with The Crying Club and got drunk, forgetting in all the chaos inside his mind, that Ronan was coming for a visit. When he woke up in the hotel room, Ronan was gone and Adam had found his note. His heart fell through his stomach, making him even more nauseous than he was before. Ronan hadn’t even listened to Adam’s fight for him. He knew that it was coming, he’d seen the glares he’d given The Crying Club. He knew they didn’t particularly like Ronan and did not see the appeal he held for Adam and sure, Adam had been late to meet him a few times, he hadn’t realised it was a problem. Adam watched Ronan leave the hotel out of the window. He’d stopped by the liquor store on the way back to his dorm. Adam had been telling the truth when he said he didn’t remember cutting himself. At that point, he was so drunk, it was all a blur.
“I don’t want to die.” Adam promised Blue. “If I hadn’t been drinking, I never would have done it, I know that’s a terrible excuse but it’s true. I know how much losing Noah hurt us, and even though it was for such a short time, I remember what happened with Gansey. I don’t want to do it.” Blue was convinced. She leant forward and took Adam’s hand.
“You might want to tell Fletcher that it wasn’t Ronan’s fault.” She offered, Adam frowned at her and she explained Ronan’s bruises.
“When you go, if you see Ronan, can you tell him to come back?” Adam asked, “I want to apologise for my part in our break up, and fight for him. I’m not ready to lose him.”
“You’re not losing anyone.” Ronan’s gruff voice came from the other side of the curtain. He swept it open, revealing himself and Gansey. Gansey immediately went to Blue’s side, whilst Ronan perched on the bottom of Adam’s bed. Adam had paled.
“How much did you hear?” He asked.
“Just the very last bit, Blue telling you about your asshole room…” Ronan was interrupted by an orderly bunding into the room.
“There are far too many visitors here, do you see that sign, it says two visitors to a bed.” They babbled, frustrated. Adam smirked.
“I apologise.” Gansey jumped in before Ronan could come up with some rude remark. “The two of us will leave,” he took Blue’s hand, “Parrish, we’ll be back later.” Blue stood up to follow Gansey out of the room. The orderly glared after them.
“Keep the noise down.” They barked at Adam and Ronan who lost it and dissolved into laughter.