Chapter Text
Charlie didn't know what to do with this information. Years of parenting and being chief fire officer hadn't prepared him for this, for interstellar wars, for child soldiers and entire planets dying. He was angry, angry beyond belief, angry for the fact he didn't know, angry that no-one told him, angry that he just presumed blades was an inexperienced and childish, a boy who was coddled without learning maturity, not someone who was never allowed to grow up, who uses youth and innocence as a shield to block out a darker path. He didn't want to think of all the times he scolded blades for it, all the times he told Dani she just had to be firm with him. firm, firm like the Decepticons had been with him?Firm like the years he refuses to think of? how many times had blades been forced to do things that he wasn't okay with, that he couldn't do. Was him just being here a trigger for him? is that why he left. More that that, He was angry at himself, angry for the child he failed to protect from becoming a tool. Passed down from angry leader to angry leader without reprieve. ones who knew the truth yet still lied, played the part and told everyone that he was immature and deserving of the punishments. Chief charlie burns was angry.
Charlie was also grieved, grieved for a future that the 'bots never saw, grieved for the fact that apparently despite the fact blades were centuries old, he is still a child. a child who never had a true childhood. Chase described the horrors he must have seen, must have gone through before he even stepped onto a battlefield. Apparently they were brutal, forced to exercise till exhaustion, starve till the fall, run till their legs couldn't carry them. and no-one cared, because in this war they needed soldiers, and no price was too high. war overruns rights, when life isn't a certainty. He was grieved over the fact he never got to know what life should have been like. as chase described it, he should have been rolling round in fields of blue, getting scraped knees, and laughing till his... what is it they call it, chassis hurt. not in pain because of drills, he should have learned about maths not missiles. chief charlie burns was grieved.
Charlie was proud. He was proud that this boy who saw things he couldn't even imagine still got up every day and smiled. He had seen too-many men in his career turn cold and viscous. too scared of the past to lean into the future, yet blades looked to the future like it was the only hope. He smiled and laughed, yes sometimes didn't do it at the most appropriate time but he still did it. He looked to the world like a man who will not let the past happen again. Charlie wouldn't blame him if he turned. the world didn't show him that love did not have to be earned. that safety wasn't a luxury, that emotions were not the enemy. Charlie Burns was proud he didn't snap long ago.
Chief Charlie Burns didn't know what to feel, Didn't know what to do. didn't know how to help. He knew that doing nothing wont change anything. wont help. but what do you do when a war-torn soldier leaves. leaves to base command because he cant be with his team anymore. a team charlie had no control over. He knew that he couldn't start giving out orders, that was Heatwave's job. His job was to lead his family. He knew he had to help somehow but how was he meant to fix what looked like millennia full of trauma and dis-regulation?