Chapter Text
Leonardo = man kisser (spef. yuichi)
Leonardo yawned as he woke up. He stretched his arms and rubbed his eyes to wake himself up. Leo heard vague yelling coming from the kitchen. Do they shut up? He thought sarcastically as his feet slid into his favorite fluffy bunny slippers, and yawned again. Leonardo realized his hunger and scrunched his nose.
He got up, heading to the kitchen, where he assumed his brothers to be.
"Oh my god, you can't say that I'm bitchless when you have no rizz, Dee!" Leo heard Mikey yell from the kitchen. "Well, you have no bitches, so you're bitchless. Simple math, my brotheren!" He heard Donnie yell.
Leo grinned as he strutted into the kitchen, "HELLO, FAMILY!" The blue-clad turtle yelled to his three siblings. Donnie rolled their eyes, but then smiled. "Leo! My favorite brother-" Raph gasped mid-bite his brekfest, "-Tell Mikey that he's bitchless." Leo rolled his eyes and looked up to the ceiling, putting a figure to his chin sarcastically. "Huh, I dunno Don, you seem kinda bitchless, too,"
Raph nodded and laughed, as well as Mikey. Donnie had an overly shocked look on his face, a hand on their heart. "I cannot believe you'd say that! Besides, you haven't been within 30 feet of a woman besides April,"
Leo's eyes lit up, "Why would I want a woman when I can have a man?" Donnie was about to make another corny come back, but paused when he processed what Leo said. Mikey stopped cooking- whatever she was cooking, Leo couldn't see it- and looked up at Leo. Raph kept eating his burnt-to-a-crisp toast, topped with chunky peanut butter, unfazed. When he noticed the silence he looked up from his food.
"..Y'all didn't know?" The red-clad turtle asked and laughed halfway through his statement. Donnie whipped around, "No??" Mikey giggled, "I mean.. I thought Leo was a man kisser, but you know..?" Leo laughed. Mikey's head perked up, "Oh! Do you gotta boyfriend?" They asked. Raph looked Mikey in the eyes, with cold eyes. "You really don't know?" Mikey shook his head. "Yuichi, he's over, like, 24/7," Raph said with a 'are-you-fucking-stupid' tone.
Donnie was silent, then they finally spoke up, "You always gave off ' gay ass bitch ', but like-" Leo cut him off, "Is that discrimination, Don? You look like a ' gay ass bitch', so shut tf up," Donnie shot him a glare, "Did you just say tee-eff out loud?" Leo flipped non-existent hair, "Yes," and batted his short ass eye lashes.