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Chapter Text

Draco stepped into the Manor, feeling genuinely happy. The familiar sounds of the wood groaning greeted him, portraits frowning upon him. It was a finally given break, something away from the issues of Potter and the chamber. Something away from the responsibilities of quidditch, and classes. He closed the door behind him, walking forward. Despite having needed the break … It would be a hard summer. Thankfully, each time returning to the Manor gave him an immense sense of relief - as if he was worried it would simply be gone one day. He closed his eyes, breathing out. Only a few more years. He would be back at Hogwarts soon, under the school's safety. He opened his eyes, yelping with surprise.

Bellatrix Lestrange was standing ahead of him, in the main hall of the Manor. It was dim, but her skin was still ghostly pale. She traced her long hands over one of the chairs' rims, looking up and around her. Her eyes rested on each and every painting in the hall, before settling on Draco. She must've heard him. He took a deep breath again, forcing himself to walk forward. He couldn't act scared of her. He shouldn't be scared of her at all, he was totally safe … He hoped. Bellatrix had been out of Azkaban for a while, staying in the Malfoy manor. She had been the driving factor behind Draco's request to stay at Hogwarts over the break, whether he told Lucius or not. Salazar knows how she hadn't gotten caught yet… Staying at a family member's house was obvious. Despite her year-long stay, she still looked like she couldn't believe she was in the Malfoys' home. “Oh, Draco.” She said, tilting her head with interest. “It's great to see you again,” She called, smiling. Her voice was harsh and grating on his ears, echoes of her haunting laughter within her speech. “You're so much bigger than you were before you left for Hogwarts!” She said, her eyes shining.

Her dress contrasted with the red chair she was standing in front of, which was a bright green. The dress itself was a deep brown, mangled from long-finished fights. Her long hair was less matted than it had been when he left - Her curls were even somewhat defined. Her wand was in her hand, curled and pointed. She got it back, it seemed. He thought, looking at it. Why had they given her wand back? Didn't they realize how danger- … ah. Draco thought, frowning. They didn't care if she was dangerous. She was related to them, and Lucius was a Death Eater as well. The two were one and the same. He would rather help her than turn her away, that was obvious. Draco looked back up at her face. She didn't look as pale as before, though she wasn't anywhere near tan. She had been in Azkaban for … A while, after all. The blood had started returning to her face, despite still looking sickly thin. She looked just like Draco had seen her in his hallucination on the train in his first year. 

It was startling.

Draco finally reached her, standing only a foot or two away. She towered over him, her heels adding a few extra inches. She was probably even taller than Potter or Lucius like that. She was terrifying. He rubbed his eyes, opening his mouth just a tad. Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry- He repeated to himself, gazing up at her. “Y… Yes… It has been a- a while,” He started, nodding. His voice was hollow, fear making it tremble. He prayed she didn't catch it. Aunt Bella put her hands behind her back, looking at Draco. “Do you need anything while I'm here?” She asked, her voice strangely empty. It wasn't an actual offer, Draco realized and shook his head. “N-nope! Nothing, im- im good, th…” He trailed off, trying to not frown. His last words got caught in his throat. It didn't feel correct to thank someone that had traumatized and ruined so many people's lives.

Then, he realized. He could take the offer anyway - She would indulge him for a short while if she deemed it an interesting request… And it certainly would be.

“Actually... Do- Ehm, I'm looking for a certain curse- Or well, I think it's a curse.” Draco began, his stare dating around. Aunt Bella's eyes bore into him. She looked like she could see into anyone's soul, see what crimes they committed, and use those to her advantage. She leaned back, her ragged dress billowing from the height of the ‘fall’. She wore high heels, so Draco assumed that was why her dress moved the way it did - Or perhaps it was the material? He had never actually touched it, but if it was the same as her gloves, it could be a plausible reason. She crossed her legs, leaning her elbow against one of the arms of the chair rests. Her wand twirled around in her lanky fingers. She looked intrigued, her eyebrows lifted. “What do you know about it?” She prompted, nodding for him to continue speaking.

It worked.

“I- I really don't know a lot about it, but… Well, uhm… It seems to cause dreams, and sends the recipient back in time.” He said, finding his voice. He needed to stop himself from shaking - Aunt Bella may be the one chance he has at getting closer to figuring out what happened to him. He needed to do this. “Back in time? How so?” Her lips were pursed, the skin on them cracking. “Send them back after death.” He said, trying to sound confident. He wasn't even sure that was what had happened. “Back after death… Well, I'm not certain. Where did you learn about this spell?” As expected, Aunt Bella had asked a question he couldn't exactly answer. “Well, I'm pretty sure you and my mother both know it.” He said quietly, hoping that was sufficient. 

“...” Aunt Bella hummed, closing her eyes and putting a finger on her chin. “It sounds familiar, but nothing truly comes to mind. I do know that there are books within this manor that cover the topic of curses, as well as in the Lestrange family house.” She huffed, shaking her head. “And… Those dreams might not be dreams. Curses are iffy. Those might be memories, described as dreams for lack of better words.” She continued, pointing with her wand as if it were a pen. If Draco hadn't known better, she would've even seemed like a Professor. “Th- Thank you anyway.” He breathed, clasping his hands before bowing. She smiled, waving her hand. “No problem, Draco!” She stood up suddenly, ruffling Draco's hair.

He clenched his jaw. Her long yellowed fingernails scratched his scalp. Draco tried to not gag as she stepped back. “If you ever want me to teach you a few curses, I'd be more than happy. Salazar, you don't even need to ask.” Her smile curled upward, her voice silky smooth as she extended the offer. She leaned forward, and Draco took a step back. “O-oh! Wow, thank you- Thank you s-so much…!” He forced, closing his eyes and smiling. It felt disgusting. But he brushed it off, telling himself not to blame himself for needing to suck up to Bellatrix. He reminded himself she may be his only lead. He needed to pretend to like her … Salazar knows what she would do otherwise. He pivoted, forcing himself to take slow, drawn-out steps. Her gaze burned his back as he unhurriedly walked away.

He tried to ignore how his legs screamed for him to just run away. He rushed back into his room, taking a deep, gasping breath. As he finally got in, he shut the door on himself, turning around. Perhaps this would be a harder summer than he originally expected. He grabbed Vinum, looking at the matted and dirty cat. It would be a good distraction from Aunt Bella. He should also make a note of what Bella said, it could prove more important than he deemed it. It may even end up being a clue deeper in his research. He set the large cat back down, sitting at his desk. Maybe it was a good time for him to reach out to his other Slytherins.

It was nearly pitch black in the room, his breathing the only thing he could faintly hear in the deep of night. His windows were open, only slightly letting light in. Compared to the pitch black, the night sky was bright. He could see the moon, almost full. It had been a long day, and Draco was certainly worn out. It was just … Hard to sleep. It was quiet, leaving him alone with his thoughts - Which was never a good thing. He had around nine years of Hogwarts memories, most of which were nowhere near ‘happy’ things to ponder.

It's been a while since Pansy died. Draco frowned, looking forward. Would she have been here if she was alive? Would she bring Vinum over to have playdates with Gnosis? Draco looked down into his arms, Vinum stretched out. His gray fur had been brushed thoroughly, and he had started looking happy again. He had a few scars from silly accidents, but they didn't make him look any worse. The only actually noticeable one - with how thick his fur got - was the one just over his nose. Even then, it wasn't that clear. Vinums skin was a grayish-pink, so it nearly matched his fur when not looking close enough. The cat looked up, his silvery green eyes peering up curiously. Draco leaned forward slowly, kissing him. Vinum mewled, and Draco flinched. 

He looked up from Vinum at the five sleeping figures on the floor, their backs turned away from him. None of them moved, despite Vinum's meow. Draco smiled, letting his body relax. Pansy would've loved this. Most of the people she considered her friends were here, minus some of the Slytherin girls she was close with. He breathed out shakily, trying to not cry. He had started learning to cope with her death - It had been going well too. He knew people relapsed, but it would feel like a failure. He looked back up at the other Slytherins sleeping, feeling somewhat calmed by them. He had invited his good friends over for a week's sleepover, just to catch up with them and try and rebuild their friend group. Pansy had kept them together better than Draco would ever be able to.

“Draco?” One of the five people spoke, sitting up. “Huh?” He responded, whispering. “It's Millicent. Are you okay? You haven't gotten any sleep.” She breathed, shifting. She quickly looked over to the other four, still asleep and facing away, Slytherins. “Im… I'm fine, Just… Thinking about Pansy.” He responded. Before she could say anything of his depressing mood, he continued. “When did you wake up?” Millie seemed to frown. Draco couldn't exactly tell, as she was facing away from the window. There was a faint silver lining around her curly hair. “I couldn't sleep.” After a moment of silence, there was soft laughter. Draco flinched, sitting up. Vinum jumped off the bed, walking over to the now awake figure. He pressed his side into Millie, purring softly. His back arched, his tail curling around Millie's arm. She smiled, petting the cat.

“I'm also still awake,” Blaise said, less quiet than Millie had been. He was still giggling softly when Millie quietly Shhh-ed him. Draco ignored her, “Really?” He asked, surprised around half of them had been unable to sleep. Blaise's head rolled to the side as Pansy’s had in the chamber. “Yeah,” Blaise said, looking outside. He blinked a few times, a smile slowly forming on his face. “It's so early…” he said quietly and wistfully, before millie whisper-scoffed. She was now fully awake, her legs crossed as she looked at Blaise. “You mean it's so late.” Blaise rolled his eyes. Quietly, two new pairs of laughter joined in. “It's early,” - “It's late,” The two said at the same time. Slowly, Vince and Greg pushed themselves up, smiling goofily at the other three awake. And now there's only one still asleep. “You two are also still awake?” Blaise whispered, his eyes going wide. Vince nodded, but Greg yawned. “I'm getting tired.” He muttered. That caused a chorus of badly muffled laughter, even including Draco. Millie looked around the room at each giggling.

“Be quiet!” She said as quietly as she could muster while yet attempting to yell at the others. “Theo is still asleep,” She started, looking proud of herself for thinking of the last Slytherin. “No, he's not,” Blaise spoke blankly, laying back down and looking at Theo, who was ‘sleeping’ next to him. “Yep, he's definitely awake.” Blaise nodded, only to burst into laughter. Draco soon joined him, finding it genuinely funny everyone had stayed awake, being quiet under the assumption others were sleeping. Theo sat up, leaning into Blaise. “I'm certainly awake,” Theo added, as if it did much. Once he finally stopped laughing, Draco groaned, standing up. He avoided Gnosis - who was laying on the floor - as he got off his bed. He was extra careful of her flicking tail, worried he might step on it and hurt her. “Shall I just light the candles? We won't get much sleep if we try now anyway.” He asked. There was a chorus of agreement, and so he pulled his wand out, lighting the candles.

Blaise didn't waste any time before starting a game. Greg and Vince were happy to join him.

Chapter Text

Draco shifted, looking up at the clouds as he sat outside. He had been thinking over everything that had happened first year. He remembered his second year all too well to worry about that. Even a bit before that. One after the other, trying to understand the other people he interacted with, and why they did what they did. He knew he overreacted at times- He could admit that.

The Ministry of Magic. His father had been sentenced there, doomed by everyone's leering eyes. Lucius. He had lost respect for him long before, but the moment still hurt. He knew how much his mother cherished his father. And then there was Potter, a bright light amid a tornado. He gave Draco his wand back. Why? Draco still didn't understand. Why was Potter so kind to him? But he left, taking with him the only glow that lit Draco's tiny world. His heart had shattered then. He should've said something.

Before long, he was headed back to Malfoy Manor. The place still sometimes made him sick, but it was so much warmer here. Now. With his parents happily talking to each other, stealing moments as often as they could. He forgot how affectionate they could be behind closed doors. Right. Then he was killed. But then he woke up. Back in his own body. That was still such a strange thing to him- Why? What made that happen? He would find out soon enough. He needed answers.

And then the wand. It wasn't his- His gaze flicked down to where he kept it. ‘Sorry.’ The wand felt like his now. Lucius dragged Olivander away, leaving Draco to have his first encounter with the young Harry Potter. It didn't last long. Lucius had walked back out, Olivander in tow. A tense conversation later, he was back home with his wand. He played around with it before an adorable and loving cat was gifted to him.

Maybe Lucius felt bad that Draco seemed lonely, but he adored Gnosis - Even if she was a pity gift. She wasn't always around, but Draco knew she wouldn't go far. She was probably just chasing a large number of animals around the manor, her claws glinting in the sunlight. Beautiful little thing. Anyway- What happened after that..? Right. The Hogwarts train. He had a less-than-appealing nightmare there, soon interrupted by Hermione, Ron, and Potter.

And then the sorting ceremony. It knew of the things Draco had seen, which was concerning, but it never seemed to have said anything about it. He was still sorted into Slytherin, which Draco really didn't mind. He liked Severus. Oh. And then he hugged Severus. He was still quite upset at his mother for hiding such an important detail, but he already knew it. This second chance thing wasn't so bad. The next thing that happened was a fight with Potter. He felt bad for being so… Jumpy, but it was personal. Potter shouldn't be prying into a Slytherin's life. That was just asking for issues.

Blah blah blah. That flying lesson thing was still one of the dumber things he had done. Followed quickly by probably the dumbest of first year. Fighting Harry Potter in the Room of Requirement. He had sort of cheated and felt a bit bad about it. Potter's fault for agreeing to fight him without setting proper rules. And then it was Halloween and he was getting blamed for the troll thing. He really hadn't done that! Why was that so hard to believe? And then Severus found out about the whole… Abuse thing. Eugh. Thankfully more things happened that caught his attention, keeping him from doing anything too stupid. And Christmas. That hadn't been a very good one.

… Ah. There was also that mirror Potter found. Why… Why was he holding Potter's hand? Draco tried to not think about that horrid thing for as long as possible, but really. He should address that at some point. Was it just because he wanted to be friends with Potter? It couldn't have been because he wanted more. He didn't. He couldn't. Potter deserved someone better- Like… Like Ginny.

And then he got himself in trouble with Filch and Severus. Why had he joined them anyway? Dragging a dragon around campus was an idiotic idea. He had a lot of idiotic ideas that year. Like arguing with Potter over if Severus was the one who wanted the Philosopher's Stone. Of course, he knew he was right, but he should have at least tried to explain it to Potter. Even if the boy's apology was absolute shit. And not even hours later he was dragged down to go get the Philosopher’s Stone… As much as he was angry at Potter, Draco felt he did the right thing trying to sacrifice himself so Potter and the others could get further. Even if he had ultimately woken up.

And soon snapped at Pansy. He wished he ever properly apologized for that. She didn't deserve his childish mood. Even if he was still upset over the cup thing. At least Potter was happy? … What happened after that? Oh! Yes. Leaving Hogwarts. He still can't believe he almost cried over leaving Potter. And then it was all over, leaving him wondering about one thing.

The way people acted. Their mannerisms, or habits.

Normally, people's personalities change over a few years. They gain new habits, they lose old ones. They pick up other people's mannerisms and lose some of their own. For example, Potter was a heavily selfish student in his first year - Draco figured that out firsthand. Compare that to his seventh year? He was a drastically different person. He had given a second chance to a certain Death Eater who had so clearly bullied him with no immediate remorse, and even went as far as to attempt to murder him. That was one Draco understood. He could justify that. It would be understandable for someone to change as time goes on.

But, there's another example; Lucius Malfoy. In Draco's first life, Lucius was a consistently abusive and horrible father. Draco would expect that Lucius’s behavior wouldn't change that drastically, especially since Draco wasn't doing the things Lucius was asking him to. If anything, it would've been expected for Lucius to be even more physical and scarring.

Now, compared to Draco's current life … First year, he was an abusive and horrible father. Over the summer, he seemed to learn what empathy was and that he was hurting his son. Second year, he was distant. What part of that sounds consistent? What could Draco have possibly done that made Lucius a good father- Well. Not a good father per se… More like… A better father. Further, this summer, Lucius acted even stranger. Some days, he would avoid Draco. Some days, he was neutral. Then, on other unfortunate days… Lucius was worse than before. He acted how Draco expected he would have on any given day in this life.

It was like Lucius had become unstable. Well, He always had been, but more so than before. Like he was flipping between Draco's old life and his current.

Of course, If Draco were to ask himself if he thought he had changed, his answer would be yes. Just like a child, he felt like he was getting more and more emotionally stable as the weeks went on. He realized that some of the things he had thought went one way… Went a bit differently. Not everyone was as against him as he had thought they were. He was a bit dramatic, wasn't he? Draco was good at being dramatic. It was easier to let his emotions get to him… Maybe his and Potter’s friendship wouldn't be so rough now that both of them were getting more mature. Perhaps the adults would take things more seriously. Or maybe that was just wishful thinking.

Draco shifted, running his thumb down his wand. Lucius was pacing the Manor, and Draco wanted nothing with it. Aunt Bella was a few rooms in, barely visible through the emerald-tinted glass. She seemed to be talking with Narcissa, both quite calm considering one was Bellatrix Lestrange. Lucius was walking around the manor grounds like he was looking for something, and Draco only hoped it wasn't him. Tomorrow, Severus would be visiting for another lesson. Nothing too important. They were little things- Helping him feel more comfortable with his wand, helping him keep ahead in his studies. He leaned back, holding said wand out, trying to grasp it like he had all of last year. He hissed with annoyance as the wand felt strange in his grip. It had been getting better over time, but it was still upsetting. Draco dropped his wand, leaning forward. The chair creaked as he did so.

Hm. He should visit the library sometime soon. Look for information. He needed it, after all.

Draco carefully opened the door, stepping into the library. He sniffled, covering his nose as dust flew around him. Great Salazar. How long had it been since anyone visited this part of the Manor? He knew his mother and father never had to, but what about Mippy? Sure, she worked under Narcissia specifically, but she would've had to visit at least once? Or just to clean? Or perhaps Dobby was the last person to have visited. That would've made sense. Though unfortunate. He missed Dobby, but the elf would surely have a better life not here.

… Draco wondered where Dobby even was. Did he get a new job? Was he healthy? Was he even alive? God- He shouldn't be considering that so heavily. He felt ill even thinking about the house elf being a mangled pile of flesh and- Okay. Okay, Draco. No more of that. He had far more important things to be worried about… What was a little hou- Okay. Seriously. He needed to stop. This isn't healthy. He isn't helping himself at all by playing the scenario out in his head. He needed answers. Badly. Especially with Bellatrix strutting around the mansion as if she owned it. She was a part of the Black family for crying out loud! Not the Malfoys- … By blood, that is. Ugh.

Okay. First things first. Avada Kedavra. That was what had killed him, so did it have anything to do with his poor situation? He scanned the library, before huffing. He was going to have to look through every single blood here, wasn't he? Well. This would be fun.

Okay. Bestiarium Magicum, Hoax and Dreams, Break with a Banshee- Wait. What? Why did they have that? That was a book Lockhart wrote. Why would they ever need that? Oh! There it was. Secrets of the Darkest Art, the book most likely to talk in detail about Avada Kedavra. Easy. He pulled the book off the shelf, dusting the cover and spine off. Surprisingly, the book was… Clean. Nearly. Still a bit dusty, but not nearly as much as everything else looked. He looked at the shelf. Oh. Wow. There was a line in the dust where the book had been slipped off the shelf. Goodness. Whoever did that was a real idiot about it. Did they not know about the lifting it and pulling it off trick?

… Probably not, as that was something he and P… Pansy… Had made… Ah. Wow. He forgot about that. And he had managed to stop a majority of his poor thoughts from what happened. He couldn't help but bit his lip as tears threatened to spill. God- He can't do this. He shoved the book open with a loud crack from the spine, wincing. Whoops. Didn't mean to do that.

Okay. He flipped through the pages. Avifors. Blah blah blah. Oppugno. Boring. Pepper breath. Really? Skipping through more pages. Antonin Dolohov- Was that just a name? Oh. There was Crucio. Erised. That sounded boring. Imperius- Finally. The killing curse. Wizard council… War… Merula… Who? Pain… Murder… Blah blah… Performance… Nope. Nothing caught his eye until the very last few sentences.

‘ Also chosen to present itself in another curse. Little is known about- ‘ … Fuck. Whoever had this last scribbled through the name so hard it tore the paper. ‘ -But it's considered a far worse fate than The Killing Curse for those who have decided the use of Avada Kedavra was an appealing idea. It's quite Ironic. ‘ Well then. He hadn't heard of that before. The name that was scribbled out was short. It couldn't have been more than ten letters. Maybe less. Probably less. He wasn't certain.

… He let the book fall closed with a sigh. That was a bust. He twisted, putting the book back on the shelf. How was he supposed to figure out what curse was being talked about for Avada Kedavra? Had he really been killed, or was it that curse? How was someone able to disguise a curse to sound and maybe even look like another one? Hm… Maybe… Was there anything on revivals?

…

…

…

After far too long of looking around the library - and picking some books off the shelf that actually sounded good - he had given up on the whole… Revival thing. That wasn't even really what happened, so he shouldn't worry too much about that. Well- He kind of was, but it was more like thrown back in time with his current mind and into his past body. That made sense to him, but maybe it didn't really. His brain was starting to feel like mush with all of the reading titles.

Oh. Right. He had also taken the time to look for things including wands and his burn, which… Didn't seem to be very common. And by very common he meant it hadn't ever happened. Draco had a few ideas; The wand wasn't meant to be his and it knew it, It didn't like the things he did, or he just no longer had that… Connection thing. He didn't know how to properly explain that. It was just… The pull of having a wand for so long. It felt so good to hold it. To use it. Ahm… Okay. It was starting to sound creepy. He had only found something on wands themselves. He remembered his well enough.

‘ Its Hawthorn wood, has a phoenix feather core and is twelve inches. Do treat it with as much care as you can, Draco. ‘

Right. The Phoenix core part. Fickle little things. They sometimes do what they want, according to the book. They're picky- Which was particularly surprising. Why would it want Draco? Was it because he knew so much magic at such a young age? And then the wood. Hawthorn, the one thing that stayed from his original wand. The one familiarity. They’re contradictory, which Draco felt fit him very very well. They're supposedly suited for healing magic, but manage curses just fine. They're at home with chaos. And Draco's mind was full of that. Healing though? Really? He slipped his wand out of his back pocket, squinting.

Dangerous thing. Or well- Big thing. It's not exactly small, but his hands have slowly been growing to fit the length. It wasn't much longer than his last wand either, so he didn't mind it much. He still certainly missed his old wand, and felt a stab of jealousy each time he saw Potter pull his wand out, but did that really matter? It wasn't even Draco's wand anymore. It could be different. He… Didn't remember. His mind felt foggy quite often. It was starting to become commonplace.

Right. That reminded him. He had learned about something he hadn't heard of in his past life. The Erised curse. Fucked up part was that a majority of the page was absolutely torn off, with a small note saying something along the lines of if you wanted to know you should've just asked your amazing aunt Bellatrix or… similar. He hadn't cared much for it because he was not going to be doing that. He refused to get her help. He didn't want it. Not at all. If he was allowed to always refuse help, he would. Happily.

Anyway, the Erised curse - from the bits he could read - was originally intended to be a spell for loved ones, but quickly turned into nightmare fuel when they realized the things they were putting someone through. The interesting part was that it had been created recently. If it was ‘created’ recently, why was it in the very old book of Secrets of the Darkest Art? Unless his memory was failing him once again, that book was as old as Salazar himself. It didn't make sense.

He gripped the book tightly in his hand, sighing. It was time he left the library to ponder what he found. He needed info on that curse but would need to wait until he went back to Hogwarts to get it.

Chapter Text

Uhm! Hi!

The only reason im not making this just part of the fic is because its 1) too long, and 2) important enough that i think it should be its own chapter!

I am fully aware I said id be returning to this series and i am SO sorry that it ended up being a lie. I had so much stuff happen within a few weeks and also holy shit im a senior now! chat ive even gone through a whole relationship im so sorry its been forever. I also have cats now was that a thing back when i first posted this work??? I !! Genuinely dont remember!

Firstly ; What im going to be doing with this series! I plan on completely restarting it. My ideas and plans for the series and where it was going to go seem bland and no longer interesting to me. That doesnt mean ill be scrapping it - Im just going to be reworking the series in a way i currently like more!

Secondly ; I am a senior and have already lost almost all of my free time. It would be super appreciated if you all could be understanding with inconsistent posting or large gaps! I cant see the future so more crazy shit might happen that could stop me, but I swear ill do the best I can at making this series better! I also!! Have memory issues :) Thats been a big roadblock for a while but its been getting worse and out of sight means fully out of mind.

And hopefully this time ill remember house elves exist. Genuinely, I keep forgetting theyre a thing ;;;

Thank you all for reading this extended authors note, and I hope ill be able to bring new life to my old works <3