1 - 20 of 43 Works in Batclan Messes With Everyone

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    “Joker claims They understand his jokes. All of them.”
    The rumors began in the shadows of Gotham, whispered between thugs and criminals who masquerade as fearless before trembling as they’re forced to step foot into the dark: where the Bats hunts.

    “…Demonic bats who fight crime? You’re shitting me,” With only a solemn shake of the head in turn, Green Lantern couldn’t help but look scandalized, “Jesus Christ, this is why I try to stay out of Gotham.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    30,266
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    463
    Kudos:
    2,601
    Bookmarks:
    606
    Hits:
    57,419
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Danny is getting frustrated. no matter what he tries he just can't beat Sam at this game! One day while grinding, he comes across the most amazing player he's ever seen, so of course he asks her to teach him her ways.
    he's not the only one who's come looking for her assistance either.

    The three way crossover chat fic that someone actually did ask for.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    83,698
    Chapters:
    61/?
    Collections:
    25
    Comments:
    4,990
    Kudos:
    7,536
    Bookmarks:
    1,933
    Hits:
    258,299
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Sometimes, Neal Caffrey displayed the strangest behaviors. The White Collar unit tries to make sense of their resident CI's quirks while Neal - alias Dick Grayson, alias Nightwing - has the time of his life messing with their heads.

    What would they say if they knew everyone in Gotham shared his odd habits?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    137,620
    Chapters:
    25/25
    Collections:
    8
    Comments:
    1,694
    Kudos:
    10,198
    Bookmarks:
    2,858
    Hits:
    284,923
  4. Tags
    Summary

    The Harvard Crew and Dick are sent back to the past by a magic user. To return to their time, they need to gather their younger selves.

    However, it is April 2014 and Dick Grayson has been off world for over two months. He’s not expected to return for at least three months. What’s a guy to do?

    Well, it might help to locate all his siblings and ensure their safety. You know. While they’re waiting.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,070
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    169
    Kudos:
    1,182
    Bookmarks:
    207
    Hits:
    12,917
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Batman and the Justice League get captured in a completely ridiculous and entirely unpredictable way. Batman's plans get called into question and by his team mates and a villain that doesn't deserve the name. He decides to abandon them to his best and most vicious general plan; let the kids sort everything out. He just wants to stop sneezing, get home, and have some soup.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,817
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    11
    Comments:
    523
    Kudos:
    8,123
    Bookmarks:
    1,837
    Hits:
    70,139
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Batman gets into a situation during an alien invasion and could use a rescue. Unfortunately, Dick and Jason don't think the Justice League is up for the task. At all.

    So Dick lets the League know that he will be handling the situation and to expect Batman back by the end of the night. He even promises that he won't be going alone. No one should stand in the way of a Batfamily rescue, even if the Justice League doesn't know there's a Batfamily at all.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,218
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    13
    Comments:
    459
    Kudos:
    10,175
    Bookmarks:
    2,359
    Hits:
    94,989
  7. Tags
    Summary

    “The Red Hood has been good for Gotham,” Robin continued. “Crime in Park Row decreased by sixty one percent almost as soon as you showed up, and that’s even taking into account all the crime you commit. Drug overdoses have decreased by twenty two percent in adults and seventy nine percent in minors. Homeless minors are ninety two percent less likely to—”

    “Kid,” Jason interrupted. “Enough statistics. What the hell is this about?”

    Robin slowly lowered the tablet with his powerpoint presentation and looked up at Red Hood.

    “You care about Gotham,” Robin summarised. “Gotham needs Batman. Batman is missing and so is Nightwing. We need you to fill in for Batman.”

    “You want me to cover Batman’s patrols?” Jason clarified.

    “No,” Robin said. “I want you to be Batman.”

    Jason bluescreened.

     

    (Or: Batman and Nightwing mysteriously disappear before Red Hood has even started antagonising them, Robin is desperate, Gotham needs Batman, and Red Hood is Batman-Shaped.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,416
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Collections:
    57
    Comments:
    4,297
    Kudos:
    14,847
    Bookmarks:
    4,293
    Hits:
    180,507
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Tim figured that since he was banned from basically everything Robin due to the new menace known as Red Hood, that heading to Titan's Tower and indulging some old photography habits would at least keep him entertained. He certainly wasn't expecting someone to break into Titan's Tower. He most definitely wasn't expecting that someone to be Red Hood and maybe the most surprising of all... he was not expecting Red Hood to apparently know him. Well... to know the night time bird photography Alvin Draper anyway but all things considered, he was willing to roll with it.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,295
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    21
    Comments:
    148
    Kudos:
    5,069
    Bookmarks:
    1,243
    Hits:
    25,446
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Loki’s gone a step further than his usual games and summoned a ‘challenge’ for Earth’s mightiest heroes. 6 demonic beings have been unleashed into the Big Apple and the Avengers only have so long to find them before more will arrive. Meanwhile the very confused ‘demons’ are racing to find their family and get home. What chaos!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,672
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    200
    Kudos:
    2,886
    Bookmarks:
    596
    Hits:
    31,112
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Red Hood’s men are worried. Red Hood got hit by something nasty that has him laid up for days and everyone is starting to get nervous. Fortunately, a few off hand comments by a not so lucid Red Hood give them all the hints they needed to get the perfect cure for their boss, a cop by the name Dick Grayson.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,219
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    30
    Comments:
    399
    Kudos:
    10,995
    Bookmarks:
    1,827
    Hits:
    95,371
  11. Tags
    Summary

    “Hello,” a voice called from the roof. Nightwing jolted with surprise. “It’s Black Canary. Could we talk?”

    Nightwing silently clambered his way up to the roof and positioned himself behind Black Canary without notice, grinning.

    With a frustrated huff, Black Canary turned around, catching sight of Nightwing and freezing in her tracks. The stillness of the moment was broken as Black Canary screamed, before turning away and bolting.

    Oracle’s laughter echoed down the comms link. “Oh, that was gold!” she exclaimed.

    --

     

    or, the batfam dress up as demons to patrol Gotham, Batman never joined the League and the Justice League is beginning to think that the rumours of bats and demons might just have some truth to it after all.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,155
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Collections:
    16
    Comments:
    265
    Kudos:
    8,623
    Bookmarks:
    1,532
    Hits:
    73,633
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Dying was natural. If there was anything natural about being beaten to death by a clown with a crowbar and blown up. Coming back to life was less natural, but not unheard of. Jason would personally not recommend having to dig your way out of your grave, but whatever universe-controlling entity that was running this show didn’t seem to care for his opinions.

    Dying twice was just a natural consequence of his resurrection. Sure, he’d expected to be kicking around for more than a year or so after his miraculous return, but he supposed accidentally spooking a tiny assassin child and getting stabbed to death was a funny enough way to go. His life was a joke after all.

    Now, coming back to life a second time was completely unexpected.

    (A Titans Tower AU where Death doesn’t seem to stick for Jason Todd anymore, but Tim doesn’t know that when he accidentally kills him.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,409
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    18
    Comments:
    521
    Kudos:
    6,962
    Bookmarks:
    1,360
    Hits:
    59,751
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Jason Todd is the unlucky recipient of one letter from Gringotts, concerning a will reading. Things spiral.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,440
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    66
    Comments:
    1,108
    Kudos:
    8,712
    Bookmarks:
    3,378
    Hits:
    103,757
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Tim dresses up as the girl from The Ring to play the ultimate prank on Kon.

    Jason has put the Tower on lockdown and is on the hunt for Robin.

    These two things are not a good combination.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,303
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    30
    Comments:
    288
    Kudos:
    11,060
    Bookmarks:
    1,927
    Hits:
    63,688
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Finally, Jason and Tim paused their fight to see what was going on. They appeared on the eighth story, near the very top, and then disappeared for only a moment before reappearing on the second floor, arms crossed and heads tilted identically. They seemed to have lost their weapons somewhere along the way. Dick wished he could take a picture without getting cited for unprofessional behavior, because it’s pretty cute. They observed the several dozen officers below for a moment, then Jason yelled:
    “What are you gonna do to us, Pig?” Dick could physically see Tim’s eye roll, though he might just be imagining it after years of knowing him.
    “Ignore everything he says. Sorry to cause trouble, you don’t have to worry about us.”
    Jason tried to roundhouse kick Tim off the girder.

    OR

    Officer Dick Grayson just wants to do his job, but his siblings keep wandering in

    Started as a one-shot, now multi-chapter!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,838
    Chapters:
    12/13
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    256
    Kudos:
    2,304
    Bookmarks:
    559
    Hits:
    41,398
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Jason is having a relatively smooth, uneventful evening. True, he’s actively fantasising about how he will tear Wójcik into itty-bitty pieces, but that’s about as peaceful as it gets in this hell-pit. He is in no way expecting Talia to come marching in. Then, when she proceeds to bury three knives into Wójcik and shoot him twice in the head, he knows shit’s about to get coconuts.

    He is still sitting in lotus position, mouth ajar, when she makes a sharp, imperious gesture in his direction.

    “Come. Time for learning has run out.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,334
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    16
    Comments:
    205
    Kudos:
    2,618
    Bookmarks:
    762
    Hits:
    21,199
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Batman is insulted during a Justice League mission, which wouldn't be a problem except Nightwing is there to hear it. The other League members don't know this is a problem because they have no idea Batman has kids, much less that Nightwing is one of them. Bruce decides to do the only reasonable thing: go on vacation. His children probably won't burn down anything too important.

    Dick just wants to defend his family and brag about his siblings. Good thing his father taught him a few things about the importance of detailed plans and talented allies.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,700
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    32
    Comments:
    704
    Kudos:
    21,045
    Bookmarks:
    4,547
    Hits:
    191,917
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Tim gets gravely injured while on a mission. Luckily, wanted criminal, murderer, and mob boss Red Hood is there to save him, but due to an unfortunate mishap involving copious amounts of glitter, the Batcave’s medical stores have been destroyed. Instead, the closest emergency supplies are one Zeta away—in the Justice League’s Watchtower.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,522
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    122
    Kudos:
    12,198
    Bookmarks:
    1,588
    Hits:
    83,714
  19. Tags
    Summary

    “So, you're the one who named the Batmobile,”
    Nightwing opened his mouth, then closed it. “Who told you I named the Batmobile?”
    “Uh, Batman?”
    A grin split out on Nightwing's face. He leaned in. “I’ll tell you a secret,” he said conspiratorially, “B lied to your face,”
    “What?”
    “I named the Batcomputer and the Batarangs,” he nodded towards where Batman was currently speaking to Superman. “The car? That’s all his doing,”
    “Oh my god,” Barry whispered.

     

    (Barry Allen goes on a quest to figure out who named the Batmobile. There isn't a single Bat who will give him a straight answer)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,854
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    9
    Comments:
    77
    Kudos:
    4,056
    Bookmarks:
    525
    Hits:
    23,149
  20. Tags
    Summary

    The Colony of Gotham is an urban legend that is whispered about in the dangerous city. It's said the Colony is a family of demons and spirits that stalk the night, hunting for the souls of the guilty.

    When Bruce became Batman, he'd never intended to be mistaken for a demon. He was happy to lean into it, though, and as he gained his partners -- as his family grew -- they all followed suit.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    45,857
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Collections:
    8
    Comments:
    572
    Kudos:
    5,012
    Bookmarks:
    1,569
    Hits:
    127,707

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