Chapter Text
It was very late at night and Sakumo was sharing a drink with Jiraiya in the house's veranda when a sudden blur of yellow attacked him.
Years of being a trained shinobi made him reach for his attacker but the familiar scent that wafted through his nose prevented him from actually harming the child now clinging at his neck.
"Shiro-san! It's good to see you, dattebayo! I missed you and I have souvenirs for you! I hope you miss me too because if you didn't, I'll be sad. How are you? Are you okay? Is everything fine, 'ttebayo? Are you feeling well—and oh, kami! Tsunade-baachansaidyou'resickandinfectedwithadisease—"
Sakumo tried to listen to Naruto's word vomit but after the first five sentences, he really couldn't understand what the kid's been saying. Naruto's words became faster and faster and his hold to Sakumo turned tighter and tighter as he went by. Sakumo was saved from death via strangulation when Jiraiya gave a boisterous laugh and plucked the kid from his neck.
He was really happy to see the child again because it's been a week since he last saw the energetic child. The last time they saw each other, Naruto was saying his farewell to him and Kakashi and told them that they were about to go on a journey to find a solution to Orochimaru'd heart problems. In complete honesty, there were nights when Sakumo was unable to sleep because he couldn't stop thinking about how the little family was fairing and wishing that they find someone who could help Orochimaru. It would be a total shame if the Sannin's heart condition was a terminal one. His kids will be heartbroken and Sakumo would just admit this to himself but he would be, too. If (kami forbid) Orochimaru died, Sakumk didn't know what he would do.
Sakumo was not even certain if he should act on his feelings towards the raven-haired man or he would just hide it and tried to squash it down. When he did the latter, his feelings just grew and he admitted defeat when at the third day he hasn't saw the man, he missed him like crazy.
Look at him now, feeling pathetic that he's even thinking of these kind of things! Way to go, Sakumo! You're an absolute mess!
(Pondering back on Naruto's words... It's Shiro-san now? What's happened to his ridiculous nickname and it was shortened?)
"Slow down and breathe, chibi! No one's chasing after you," Jiraiya chided Naruto in a light tone and placed the kid at his lap.
Sakumo took a lungful of breath and shot his friend a look of gratitude. Jiraiya grinned at him then gave the blond his full attention.
"What's this about Tsunade saying Sakumo's infected with a disease?" The Toad Sannin inquired.
Sakumo's infected with what, now?
(And how in the name of kami did Jiraiya understood what Naruto blurted out?!)
The Hatake stared with wide eyes at the totally calm child. Why was Naruto acting like the thought that he was infected with a disease was nothing? And why was he infected again? What disease? Wha.. How?
"Can you tell us how that happened?" Jiraiya surprisingly asked in a gentle tone.
"Uhn!" The child enthusiastically bobbed his blond head. "We went to Tanzaku Gai to meet with Tou-san's medic friend. He left us in our hotel but Kisame-chan, Same-chan and I decided to go sightseeing and so, we went to a casino. We won so much money, dattebayo, and Tsunade-baa challenged us (I didn't even know that she was there) in a game and I won that one, too! I am now the owner of the Hokage Mountain, ha! I'm too awesome! And-and I also won a favor from her and I asked her to heal Tou-san. But then she told us that he was just experiencing love and he's not having a heart condition. I remembered that you were having weird symptoms that's a wee bit different from Tou-san but completely the same thing. So, I now diagnosed you as having an infectious disease of love, 'ttebayo!"
Naruto's explanation was long and he had so much to unpack from all of that (because what? He owns the Hokage Mountain? The Senju owned that part of land? And Tsunade-hime just used it as a betting tool? What?!) but he was more focused on the last part.
How.
How did Naruto know that? Was Sakumo's feelings towards Orochimaru that obvious?!
Sometimes, Sakumo forgets that Naruto's an Uzumaki. That Clan's famous for their insights. Naruto may be oblivious on how he affected the world around him but he really was insightful when it comes to emotions. He didn't know how that was possible but when it comes to Naruto, Sakumo wasn't even surprised anymore.
The child could do anything if he put his mind into it.
Sakumo was shaken out of his reverie to deny what the child said because he couldn't have Jiraiya having funny thoughts now. The teasing would be endless.
"Love? That's not a disease, Naruto," Sakumo said with an indulgent smile.
"Yes, it is. Love is a disease because it makes us do things that we would normally won't do just to make the person we love happy. And it's infectious, too, because when we love someone and show it to them, it take a bit of a time but they will also be infected with that disease. It's not like it's hard to reciprocate love if we're being honest about it, dattebayo," the child explained seriously.
The Hatake patriarch was surprised at how deep the child was and he was about to commend him when he continued.
"I know you love Tou-san, so you should show him how you feel for him," Naruto said like it was a trivia and Sakumo almost had a heart-attack. "He tries to hide it but he's really sad. So, as a person who loves him, please try to make him happy, Shiro-san. Give him flowers."
"W-wha... Flowers?" Sakumo was dumbfounded and he jusy knew that his whole face was burning up.
He risked an eye at Jiraiya and saw the shaggy-haired man grinning maliciously at him, eyes ablazed with humor and something dreadful. Oh, curse it! He would never hear the end of this!
"Uh-huh," Naruto nodded nonchalantly like he didn't just shattered a piece of Sakumo's dignity. "Tou-san loves plants. It calms him and makes him happy. Kisame-chan and I planned to buy him lots and lots of plants because of it. By the way, Shiro-said, where's Tiny-sensei? I planned to surprise him with a sleepover! I hope he wasn't too lonely when I was gone because he has Gai-chan with him."
Refusing to think about Naruto knowing how he felt about Orochimaru and his suggestion to give the man flowers, Sakumo cringed at the child's plan.
Kakashi was far from lonely from the past week. Gai-kun was... a bit energetic and literally brightens every room he walks into.
"He's at his room, Naruto. I don't know if he's sleeping but try not to disturb him too much, okay?"
"Uhn!"
Then the before the child disappeared, he grabbed Jiraiya and motioned for him to listen to what he was about to say.
"I know you also love Tou-san, so please give him flowers, too."
Jiraiya tilted his head curiously, "how can you tell that I love, Oro-teme?"
"You're friends, right? Friends love each other. That's just obvious, Ero-sennin. Good night, dattebayo!"
Sakumo was not certain if the love Naruto was talking about was platonic or not. Because his advice of giving the Snake Sannin flowers was given to the both of Sakumo and Jiraiya. Maybe he could escape his friend's teasing with that excuse?
"So..." Jiraiya sipped his sake and broke the silence. "You and Oro-teme, huh? How did that happen?"
Damn it.
Kakashi was finally at peace. He finally managed to escape Gai and his incessant lecture about YOUTH! and was about to have his first peaceful sleep for the whole week when the doors to his room forcefully opened.
"Tiny-sensei, I missed you! Did you miss me—"
And his hard-earned peace was torn away from him by his number one peace disruptor, tearing his warm blanket away from him and hugging him as if his life depended on it.
(It's already late at night! Why was Gai and this idiot sunshine not giving him the time to sleep?!)
(At this moment, Kakashi really had a strong urge to crush some sunflowers as a form of revenge.)