Chapter Text
Tue/9.12 paddy : P-P-P-P-PARTY
Tue/9.12 wormy : P-P-P-P-P-P-PARTYYY
Tue/9.12 prongy : P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-PARTYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tue/9.13 paddy : it's time to plan my subjects
Tue/9.13 wormy : right James you're getting the alcohol and snacks
Tue/9.13 prongy : whatever you say worms :)
Tue/9.14 wormy : then Sirius you're getting decorations and shit like that
Tue/9.14 paddy : sir yes sir
Tue/9.14 wormy : what are we doing for invites?
Tue/9.15 prongy : group chat?
tell everyone to bring anyone?
Tue/9.15 paddy : sounds good
Tue/9.15 wormy : okay, james you can do that you love people right?
Tue/9.15 prongy : that's true
people are awesome
Tue/9.16 paddy : some of em
Tue/9.16 prongs : most of em are
you're just quite unlucky pads
Tue/9.16 paddy : gee thanks for that heart warming speech prongs
Tue/9.17 moony : Kids behave.
Tue/9.17 paddy : MOONY!!!!
Tue/9.17 moony : Forget I was in this chat?
Tue/9.17 paddy : never moony nevvverrrrr
Tue/9.18 wormy : I did
Tue/9.18 prongy : I did too, sorry bestie :(
Tue/9.18 paddy : there may be a slight possibility that I forgot I added you
BUT ONLY a slight one
Tue/9.19 moony : It's okay pads, I forgot I was in the group until you three woke me up way too early.
Tue/9.19 paddy : moons it is not early
Tue/9.19 moony : Yes it is.
Tue/9.20 paddy : fine it's 'early' but not early enough for spelling mistakes
Tue/9.20 moony : How dare you. It's never early enough for the lack of proper grammar.
Tue/9.20 paddy : oh sorry of course but what about EVERY SINGLE MORNING YOU MESSAGE ME
Tue/9.21 prongy : oh Remus please tell me more about your proper use of grammar
Tue/9.21 wormy : of course anything for my siri-poo ;)
Tue/9.21 moony : I would never say Siri-Poo.
Ew, it hurt to type that.
Tue/9.21 paddy : you're not going to start calling me that then?
Tue/9.22 moony : Not until you've put a ring on it.
Tue/9.22 paddy : oh i will don't worry
Tue/9.22 wormy : FLIRT IN YOUR OWN GROUP
now Remus, you are coming to the party right
Tue/9.23 moony : Wouldn't miss it for the world, Pete.
Tue/9.23 prongy : right guys give me two secs
Tue/9.28 jimbo : alright people, you have been invited to the marauders FAMOUS...
HALLOWEEN PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
from me, aka James, aka aka jimbo, aka aka aka prongs
please introduce yourself and rsvp with a favourite beverage and your costume idea (we are not having a repeat of last year with eleven sue sylvesters)
for example:
Hi I'm james pretty please may i have Stella Artois and I'm going as a pigeon (terrifying creatures but I'm thinking I'll be fine as long as i avoid mirrors)
Tue/9.29 petey : hey, peter pettigrew, sparkling water, and i'm being that blob on that one episode of dr who.
Tue/9.29 jimbo : very straightforward Pete
I love it.
Tue/9.30 marlene : hey bitches, james cause you're super rich can you buy me some posh tequila???
marlene btw
and me and Dorcas are going as willow and tara
Tue/9.30 sirius was here : you're tara right?
Tue/9.30 marlene : obviously
Tue/9.31 dorcas : Dorcas.
I'll have literally whatever.
I'm Willow.
Tue/9.31 marlene : great job sweetie
Tue/9.32 dorcas : shut the fuck up.
Tue/9.32 marlene : make me <3
Tue/9.32 remus : Can you both shut up.
Thanks.
Remus Lupin, I'm the same as Dorcas, James you can pick for me.
Tue/9.33 jimbo : happy to moon man :)
Tue/9.33 remus : And Lily's picking my costume, I'm picking her's.
Tradition and shit.
Tue/9.34 lilies : aww so happy you care about our TWELVE YEAR OLD 'tradition shit' Rem <3
Tue/9.34 remus : Course I do Junie.
Tue/9.35 maryyy : Ignoring how sweet that was I'm mary
James can you pretty please get me dr pepper love youuuuu
and i'm being mary had a little lamb or something like that
I know all of u except from Remus and Dorcas
Which I'm blaming Marlene and Sirius for
rude really trying to keep me away from their partners
So hi you two!!!!!!!
Tue/9.36 sirius was here : NOPE
Tue/9.36 jimbo : HAA
mary i love you 2 <3 <3
Tue/9.36 dorcas : Hi Mary
I love you three
Tue/9.37 maryyy : aww thanks dear
I do want to meet you in person before the party
That sound good?
Tue/9.37 dorcas : Definitely
we'll invite Remus too?
Tue/9.37 remus : Love to, Hi mary.
Tue/9.38 maryyy : REMUS!!!!!
hiii
Tue/9.38 sirius was here : nuh huh NO
Tue/9.38 remus : What's wrong love?
Hi mary!
Tue/9.39 marlene : HA OMG
remus i love u too
Tue/9.39 remus : You jealous babe @sirius was here ?
Tue/9.39 sirius was here : i hate u
Tue/9.40 remus : That's not a very nice thing to say to your boyfriend.
Tue/9.41 petey : Remus i'm in the same room as him and he looks like he might pass out
maybe calm it down a bit
OR NOT!!
just giving you the option.
Tue/9.41 remus : Mary, I think you might have made a slight mistake,
My Friend Sirius has not introduced us yet.
Tue/9.42 maryyy : ohh sorry i just assumed
Tue/9.42 Mary Berry : what the heck are you doing
lock that adorable man down
Tue/9.42 Sir David Attenborough : i'm tryinggggg
Tue/9.43 remus : Oh it's fine,
Lily your turn!
Tue/9.43 lilies : perfect deflection hun!
Tue/9.43 remus : Thanks junie x
Tue/9.44 lilies : Hi, I'm Lily, I'm with Mary Dr Pepper please James, and what Remus said, my costume's a surprise too.
Tue/9.44 jimbo : Lovely Lils
SIRIUS YOUR TURN
Tue/9.45 sirius was here : well thank you james for that introduction
i'm sirius even though all of you already know that ;)
Tue/9.45 remus : Hurry up, prick.
Tue/9.45 sirius was here : thank u for that moony
Tue/9.46 remus : ;)
Tue/9.46 sirius was here : prongs do you remember that night out like last month?
Tue/9.46 jimbo : nope :)
Tue/9.47 sirius was here : the one where we had those hot pink drinks?
Tue/9.47 jimbo : yep?
Tue/9.47 sirius was here : well can you find those drinks for me?
please ur the besttt
Tue/9.47 jimbo : happy to :)
Tue/9.48 lilies : No, Sirius don't be an arse, pick something he can buy in aldi, or Waitrose knowing you.
Tue/9.48 sirius was here : fineeeee
i'll have the same as marls
and my costume is a surprise sorry guys
Tue/9.48 jimbo : fine loser don't tell us
right everybody invite anyone you want to
Halloween and it starts at nine
I SOLEMNLY SWEAR I AM UP TO NO GOOD
Tue/9.49 sirius was here : I SOLEMNLY SWEAR I AM UP TO NO GOOD
Tue/9.49 petey : I SOLEMNLY SWEAR I AM UP TO NO GOOD
Tue/9.49 marlene : I guess I SOLEMNLY SWEAR IM UP TO NO GOOD
Tue/9.50 dorcas : what the fuck babe??
Tue/9.50 marlene : do it or we're not doing what we talked about yesterday
Tue/9.50 dorcas : I SOLEMNLY SWEAR I AM UP TO NO GOOD
Tue/9.51 maryyy : Oooo me too!
I SOLEMNLY SWEAR I'M UP TO NO GOOD
was that right?
Tue/9.51 jimbo : PERFECT MARES :)
c'mon remus and lils
Tue/9.51 Lils <3 : Do I have to jamie???
Tue/9.52 Jamie : pretty please?
with a cherry on top???
Tue/9.52 lilies : I solemnly swear I am up to no good.
Tue/9.52 remus : What the fuck junie????
The betrayal!
Tue/9.52 sirius was here : cmon moony there's no point refusing
u r already a marauder
Tue/9.53 remus : No, it's out of principle I refuse.
Tue/9.53 jimbo : pretty please remusss
Tue/9.53 lilies : Listen to the man remus.
Tue/9.53 remus : LILY!?!?
Tue/9.54 sirius was here : mooonnnyyyy
Tue/9.54 remus : Padfoootttttt.
Tue/9.54 sirius was here : just do it
Tue/9.55 marlene : nike who?
Tue/9.55 dorcas : great one baby x
Tue/9.55 marlene : ;)
Tue/9.55 remus : You know what, fine.
I solemnly swear I'm up to no good.
Are you all happy?
Tue/9.56 sirius : extremely :)
Tue/9.56 moony : You sicken me.
Tue/9.56 padfoot: i’m just too sweet?
Tue/9.57 moony : Yeah, yeah, something like that.
Tue/9.59 rem bear : I have a bone to pick with you Miss Juniper Evans.
Tue/9.59 queen lils : I’d love to hear your complaint.
Tue/9.59 rem bear : I think you have been keeping things from me. So I am giving you one chance to get it all out there, starting now.
Tue/10.00 queen lils : You remember when I said I didn’t have a pen in year three
Well I actually did I just didn’t want to share because you chewed yours and I thought it was gross.
Tue/10.00 rem bear : I got five minutes off my golden time!
Tue/10.01 queen lils : Deserved.
Tue/10.01 rem bear : Well thank you for sharing, but that wasn’t really what I was on about.
Tue/10.01 queen lils : Okayyyy…
I maybe have
a boyfriend
Tue/10.02 rem bear : HE’S YOUR BOYFRIEND?
Junie I am SO happy for you!
Tue/10.02 queen lils : I never said who??
Tue/10.02 rem bear : MY GIRL BAGGED JAMES FUCKING POTTER!
I’m virtually spinning you around.
Customer one second.
Tue/10.06 rem bear : Tell me how it happened!
Tue/10.06 queen lils : You’re not mad I didn’t tell you straight away?
Tue/10.07 rem bear : No honey, you are perfectly right in telling me whenever you want.
And I’m sure you had a good reason too.
Tue/10.07 queen lils : I’m glad you know now, my bfg.
Tue/10.07 rem bear : we’re back to calling me bfg?
Tue/10.08 queen lils : yep!
And how it happened, well we talked at the gig on Friday and when sent you and Sirius off, Marlene and Dorcas left us alone and he offered to walk me home. I said yes and we talked the whole way, and then when we got to my flat we both just stood at the door for ages just looking at each other.
And then I asked him if he wanted to come in, and it was kind of obvious that it was like a do you want to stay the night kind of thing. He said no, and asked me on a date the next date, said he liked talking to me and didn’t want to just hook up.
Tue/10.09 queen lils : I said yes and he looked so exited, I hugged him for ages, then he left. Our date was so wonderful and amazing, because he’s so wonderful and amazing, he took me for a picnic and then we went to this laser gun place and I laughed about how him it was you know? But I had such a good time.
He’s so sweet and funny and pretty and ugh.
And then we went out again on Sunday and he brought me SUNFLOWERS REMUS!
Tue/10.10 queen lils : Not lilies sunflowers and I asked him to be my boyfriend because he knew that I wouldn’t want lilies.
Sorry I did a whole speech.
Tue/10.10 rem bear : Lily you are allowed to go on full speeches about your boyfriend.
You’re not allowed sorry, you’re encouraged.
Tue/10.11 queen lils : WHAT HAPPENED TO ME?
when did I get so sappy!!!
Tue/10.11 rem bear : When you started dating a human care bear.
Tue/10.11 queen lils : Ugh, let’s go out, drink some beers and ignore our feelings.
Tue/10.12 rem bear : Lily honey, we’ve never done that.
And it’s ten o’clock in the morning.
And I’m meant to be working.
And you’re very happy with James.
Tue/10.12 queen lils : Yes I am, thank you for this Rem.
Tue/10.13 rem bear : Anytime you want to gush about James Potter I’ll be there.
Though I kind of do have to work though Junie, come round later and we’ll watch B99?
Tue/10.13 queen lils : Of course hun, I’ll be round seven, go back to work xx
Tue/12.19 padfoot: u on your break yet moons??
Tue/12.31 moony : Am now, what’s up?
Tue/12.31 padfoot : just wondering your opinions on the brownies at Waterstones cafe?
Tue/12.31 moony : I don’t have a strong opinion on them?
…why?
Tue/12.32 padfoot : why moony are u questioning my purest intentions with that simple question????
Tue/12.32 moony : Yes, exactly that.
Tue/12.32 padfoot: well I was just wondering sorry to blow your whistle
Tue/12.33 moony : That just doesn’t make sense there.
Tue/12.33 padfoot : toot your horn?
Tue/12.33 moony : No, I don’t even know what you’re trying to say?
Tue/12.34 padfoot : i uhhh
don't be paranoid?
just a question moons
Tue/12.34 moony : This conversation is making me more paranoid.
Tue/12.34 padfoot : huh weird
Tue/12.35 moony : Right, what’s going on padfoot?
Tue/12.35 padfoot : whatever do you mean moonbeam??
innocent old me planning something?
Tue/12.35 moony : This is the worst, just tell me what you’re doing.
Tue/12.36 padfoot : but where’s the fun in that?
Tue/12.36 moony : I hate you.
Tue/12.36 padfoot : nahhh I don’t think you do :)
just to make 100% sure u don’t hate me I’ll give u hints
Tue/12.36 moony : Great, Lucky me.
Tue/12.37 padfoot : LETS PLAY I SPY BUT THE THING I SPY IS THE SURPRISE BUT ITS NOT A SURPRISE BECAUSE IM TELLING YOU!!
Tue/12.37 moony : Right, sure.
Wait, this just doesn’t work.
Tue/12.37 padfoot : yeah it does you’re just being a preemptive sore loser
Tue/12.38 moony : You know what fine, go ahead.
Tue/12.38 padfoot : I walk with my little legs-alk to somewhere beginning with w
Tue/12.38 moony : Wow pads, what an awesome idea you had.
Westminister.
Tue/12.39 padfoot : nope guess again
Tue/12.39 moony : A walk.
Tue/12.39 padfoot : not a place moony dearest
Tue/12.39 moony : Wuckingham Palace.
Tue/12.40 padfoot : nearly there :)
Tue/12.40 moony : Wondon eye.
Tue/12.40 padfoot : do you want a hand moony??
Tue/12.40 moony : I don’t need one… but if you’re offering?
Tue/12.41 padfoot : this is only because I feel bad for you
not because you are my friend
ur hint is yourself
Tue/12.41 moony : So a place, that you are visiting, that begins with w and has something to do with me.
Tue/12.42 moony : Sirius.
Tue/12.42 padfoot : yes moonykins?
Tue/12.42 moony : Sirius.
Tue/12.43 padfoot : I’ll see you in like five minutes darling xxxx
Tue/12.43 moony : SIRIUS!
Tue/12.23 Jamie : Heyy Lils whatcha doing tonight??
Tue/12.23 Lils <3 : me and rem are watching Brooklyn nine nine,
but I’m free right now?
Tue/12.24 Jamie : Me too!
well we have to do something together then!!
Tue/12.24 Lils <3 : I was just about to start cooking, do you want to come round and I’ll make something for the both of us?
Tue/12.24 Jamie : I agree on one term
Tue/12.25 Lils <3 : What’s that?
Tue/12.25 Jamie : I help you cook
Tue/12.25 Lils <3 : Deal.
Tue/12.25 Jamie : Great, I’ll be round in a sec xx
Tue/12.26 Lils <3 : Xx
It was now a minute after Sirius said he would be there, and Remus was panicking. Not any less than he was for the previous five minutes, but he was panicking still.
He was debating with his mind about how bad it would be if he hid in the employees bathroom for the significant future, maybe the rest of his life. He had another twenty minutes left of his lunch break, which he was spending on a table in the very corner of the café. Maybe Sirius wouldn't notice where he was. But, it seemed it was too late for that, because as soon as Remus looked up, his eyes reached one smiling Sirius Black.
"Wow moons what a surprise to see you here!" Remus sent him his best glare he could give without showing how amused he was by the whole situation.
”OooO, scary!”
At that, Remus burst out laughing, “Hi Padfoot.”
“Moony, thanks for the invite.”
Remus tilted his head, “Ah, the invite, must have forgotten about that.”
”Must be hard to remember with that pretty little head of yours,” Sirius said tapping the side of Remus’ head.
"This pretty little head of mine is fine at remembering things, thank you," Remus replied batting Sirius's hands away, as he started to get up from his seat, "Come on then, I thought you came for the very famous brownie."
"Yes, indeed, that was my whole reason for coming."
Remus smiled and stood in the queue with Sirius trailing slightly behind him. Once he got to the front he smiling politely at his co worker he was fifty percent sure was called frank, "A brownie, and two teas," He turned around to question Sirius if that was alright, who merely nodded, "Just that please on my discount."
His arm was tugged and he turned to face Sirius, "I'll pay moons."
Which Remus gave another glare, "Don't be stupid."
Sirius smiled back and they sat down by a window. "How long do you have left on your break?"
Remus checked his watch, "Fifteen minutes, twenty at most," he said smiling back up at Sirius, "Enough time for you?"
Sirius smirked, "It'll have to do, I guess."
So they spent the rest of Remus' break chattering non-stop about things that didn't matter, well mostly. A few times Remus would flirt with Sirius - just to test the waters - and most of the time, it ended the same.
"-and I just think that emmet deserved so much better he's the best character to ever be invented-"
Remus noticed a stray hair over Sirius' face and brushed it back, making too much eye contact to be friendly.
Sirius made a choking noise and turned a lovely shade of pink, Remus hit his back and smiled, "Alright love?"
He turned even more red, but his choking had stopped now, and he was staring at Remus like he had three heads.
At this point Remus laughed, which led to Sirius muttering angrily in French under his breath, at least Remus was pretty sure it was French.
It happened again as Sirius was about to leave, and Remus, go back to work. They hugged goodbye and both clung to each other too close to be purely platonic. Both throats were cleared and the weird tension was forgotten. Sirius left flustered, and Remus stayed and went to work just as flustered.
Tue/13.04 padfoot : moony i hate u sometimes
Tue/13.08 moony : Hate you always <3
Tue/13.08 padfoot : go to work you sexy loser
Tue/13.11 moony : How the fuck do I respond to that?
Tue/13.11 padfoot : you say
anything for you my hot sexy padfoot
and i'll go
wow moons ;)
Tue/13.13 moony : Shut the fuck up.
Tue/13.13 padfoot : that's not your line moons :(
Tue/13.15 moony : I'm trying to work.
Tue/13.15 padfoot : are my super duper impure thoughts infecting u and you're going to run all the way to my house
Tue/13.15 moony : Jesus Christ.
Tue/13.16 padfoot : if u want me to be
Tue/13.17 moony : no
me
work
bye
Tue/13.17 padfoot : you
work
me
win
bye bye moons xxx
Tue/13.19 rembean : JUNIE
DORCAS
HELP ME
SIRIUS
Tue/14.32 lilbean : Sorry I was with James
wait aren't you meant to be working?
Tue/14.34 rembean : It's quiet.
Tue/14.34 lilbean : Sure, what do you need help with?
Tue/14.35 rembean : He keeps flirting with me.
Tue/14.35 lilbean : And the problem is...
Tue/14.35 rembean : Him flirting with me!
And me being an idiot unable to respond.
Tue/14.36 lilbean : well what EXACTLY happened?
Tue/14.36 rembean : {screenshot}
Tue/14.36 lilbean : Oh thats bad.
Tue/14.37 rembean : Gee thanks.
Tue/14.37 lilbean : Like really bad
what are you even doing?
Tue/14.37 rembean : You're really helping here.
Tue/14.38 lilbean : sorry
sorry
Okay you want advice?
Tue/14.38 rembean : Yes please.
Tue/14.38 dorbean : jump off something
that shit was difficult to read
Tue/14.39 lilbean : Not helpful Cas.
Tue/14.39 dorbean : just the truth.
Tue/14.39 rembean : Um, guys?
Tue/14.40 lilbean : You need to flirt harder.
Tue/14.40 dorbean : she's actually right this time
Tue/14.40 lilbean : What do you mean 'this time'?
I am right all times
Tue/14.41 rembean : I'll leave you lot to sort this out,
Thanks,
I guess.
Tue/16.01 moony : Well, here I am. What are your two other wishes?
Tue/16.02 padfoot : ...
moony?
everything all good??
Tue/16.02 moony : Are you Siri?
Because you autocomplete me.
Tue/16.02 padfoot : If you try calling me Siri all of your jumpers will end up in the river.
Tue/16.03 moony : If you were a flower, you'd be a DAMdelion.
Tue/16.03 padfoot : that one wasn't as good.
Tue/16.03 moony : That was my best one!
Tue/16.04 padfoot : sorry but it really wasn't
can I asked what the purpose of the absolutely terrible pick up lines are?
Tue/16.04 moony : To make you blush, obviously.
Tue/16.04 padfoot : didn't work moony
Tue/16.05 moony : Ah, well, was a long shot.
I know what works.
Tue/16.05 padfoot : ...moons
what does that mean
Tue/16.06 moony : {voicenote}
"Gobeithio nad wyt ti'n cyfieithu hyn, dim ond eisiau dweud wrthyt pa mor anhygoel yw dy farn i mi, fy seren. Rwyt ti'n syfrdanol ac yn brydferth o fewn ac o'r tu allan. Gobeithio rwyt ti'n gwybod pa mor fawr yw dy ystyr i mi."
["Hopefully you don't translate this, i just wanted to tell you how amazing I think you are my star. You're stunning and beautiful inside and out. I hope you know how much you mean to me."]
Tue/16.07 padfoot : that's not fair I don't know what it means
Tue/16.07 moony : Good.
Tue/16.08 padfoot : and i am so not blushing
Tue/16.08 moony : Is that right?
Tue/16.08 moonman : Are either of you with Sirius?
Tue/16.08 lily's bf : sorry I'm in class.
Tue/16.09 pete the ladies man : James why is this my name?
and yes rem, he's in his room.
What do ya want??
Tue/16.09 moonman : Can you just check in on him and tell me if there's anything unusual?
Tue/16.09 pete the ladies man : sure?
Tue/16.10 lily's bf : it’s ur name cause now ur the only single one of us, i've been talking u up to everyone i know.
Tue/16.10 moonman : I'm right here?
Tue/16.10 lily's bf : shut up moon man
you and sirius are practically married
Tue/16.10 moonman : Go back to class.
Tue/16.11 pete the ladies man : I mean everything's normal apart from he looks like he might spontaneously combust
Tue/16.11 moonman : Thank you peter!
Tue/16.09 padfoot : yes that is right moony
i am so fine right now
Tue/16.10 padfoot : well i'm fine all of the time too.
you should've used that pick up line
are you a parking ticket because you have fine written all over
that would've worked
MOONYYY
where'd you go
where did you come from
Tue/16.11 padfoot : COTTON EYED JOE
Tue/16.11 moony : Wow, thanks for that performance,
Also, what were you saying about not blushing?
{screenshot}
Tue/16.12 padfoot : he's lying you have no real evidence
Tue/16.12 moony : Mmm, sure.
Tue/16.12 padfoot : ALSO
why do u have a chat without me in?
excuse u
apologise now and add me immediately
Tue/16.13 moony : Sorry no can do.
Tue/16.13 padfoot : what do u mean?
Moony?!?!!
Tue/16.14 moony : Sorry I'm in a tunnel.
Tue/16.14 padfoot : THAT DOESN'T WORK HERE
Tue/16.15 moony : You're breaking up.
sctrrrraahhhhaasss
can't
ssssstaaacccc
hear you...
Tue/16.15 padfoot : hate u always <3
(not really tho)