1 - 20 of 44 Works in Misquoting the Bible (Abrahamic Religions)

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    In the beginning, before God made earth and the beings that inhabited it, including Humans, He made the Angels. They were the first Holy Peoples in existence and they honored God. After some time, He wished for a companion that was just like Him, if not better, so He made an angel perfectly after his own image. He called the Angel Sameal, and put him in charge of worship and music and dreams and beauty, and Sameal was just like God, but he was not only the good and holy attributes that God assumed and instead also shared God's pride.

     

    Aka- a rewrite of Hazbin Hotel if it was a bit more into the source material and had infinity more problems

    Not sure how often updates will be 乁⁠|⁠ ⁠・⁠ ⁠〰⁠ ⁠・⁠ ⁠|⁠ㄏ

    Pls tell me if I need to fix tags I'm bad at this lol

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,844
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    204
  2. Tags
    Summary

    A different side of the silver-eyed entity than we normally see, as it travels the multiverse gathering mortals it calls its "children". No evil monologues or torture chambers for Silver Eyes this time around; what a kind soul it's become! Sort of. Actually no, it's still... it's still killing people and threatening to erase reality. Ah well. Hey, baby steps. It is genuinely nice to at least two characters in this one.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,891
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    115
  3. Tags
    Summary

    (40648 words is the book for Genesis from the bible)

    Erick’s fat fucking tiddies flapped in the wind as his supple butthole queefs with tremendous force.

    The introduction to the incredible sage of

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    45,036
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    17
  4. Tags
    Summary

    An interpretation before Adelmo’s fall.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,348
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    83
  5. Tags
    Summary

    萨姆·温彻斯特不清楚自己到底是不是发了疯,他父亲是个狂信上帝的疯子,整天蜗居在他们称为“家”的房子里祈祷,而他又太不信,尽管他的确怀疑自己的出生有些不敬神之处,毕竟,他听见老鼠跟自己说话了,那老鼠还长着一双黄眼睛。它说他是敌基督,注定要领导地狱的。这要真是他的臆想,那他还真算是天赋异禀。它还说,你得离开这里,去看看你必然统治的世界——好吧,萨姆想,这倒是说中了他的心事。录取通知书现在就在柜子的最底层,而他还不敢告诉迪恩,他有点亵渎地爱着的迪恩。
    迪恩·温彻斯特不明白和老鼠讲话是怎么一回事,不明白父亲信的那个主究竟想要什么,也不明白自己究竟希望萨姆离开还是留下。他只能紧紧抓住“爱”这一个小东西,还有附带其上的希望。
    简言之:温温在保守基督教家庭里长大的某个宇宙
    8.7更新:Dean/Rhonda Hurley的戏份比计划中更多(真的多了很多),已添加tag+章节开头Warning。请按需规避。
    9.14更新:不知不觉已经写了将近一半……好不可思议。照目前来看会是be,请斟酌后阅读!

    Series
    Language:
    中文-普通话 國語
    Words:
    53,532
    Chapters:
    5/10
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    16
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    244
  6. Tags
    Summary

    In which love, as they say, is the only law.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    70
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    33
  7. Tags
    Summary

    A series of snapshots following the nerds of Hatchetfield High. Awkward hangouts, unexpected feelings, and way too many opinions about swimsuits. All leading up to one summer pool party none of them are quite ready for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,892
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    69
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    432
  8. Tags
    Summary

    “Totes! Ahem. If anyone, like, knows the good they hafta do and don’t do it, it’s totes sin for them. The book of James, chapter four, verse seventeen.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,377
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    53
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    910
  9. Tags
    Summary

    All your juicy details about God and his posse dumbed down to our Gen-Z standards

    I was originally thirteen when I wrote this and that's the title on Wattpad but now that I'm putting it on here and I'm fourteen I have changed it

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,782
    Chapters:
    13/?
    Comments:
    23
    Kudos:
    60
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    804
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Anonymous asked:

    Sadglo Copia as Count Orlock and Mouse as Ellen...is this anything?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    543
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    18
    Hits:
    159
  11. Tags
    Summary

    There’s a new man at Nico’s parish.

    He started attending the evening Mass a few weeks ago.

    He always sits in the third row of pews. Tan, freckled, and long limbed, he’s become somewhat of a distraction as Nico tries to give the homily to the small congregation that attends his evening Mass. 

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,087
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    161
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    1,980
  12. Tags
    Summary

    A shorter version of a dystopian story about a world where women are, in the most literal sense, treated as objects. It can be a bit dark at times so read at your own risk

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,454
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    215
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Under the gaze of weeping saints and a crucifix bathed in moonlight, an angel's screams shatter the sacred silence as his wings are torn apart, feathers scattered like desecrated prayers on the altar's cold stone. In the shadow of holy ruin, devotion twists into something darker, and freedom tastes of blood.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,198
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    49
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    1,410
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Of course he is eager. Javier's nose is to Arthur's throat now, thumb on where his pulse thrums just under his jaw.

    Of course he would endure anything to be here. He runs hot enough to soothe Javier's thin bones, which have been missing their own heat since eighteen ninety-five.

    Of course I'm eager, he thinks. I would bleed out, as long as I was held by him.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,620
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    37
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    842
  15. Tags
    Summary

    His name was almost Jesus, or one of its many derivatives, Joshua or Józsua in the familiar Creole. For a mother named Marie, it fit with the way of things, the way they ought to be. Her mind changed when her lips parted and the nurse’s pen lingered above the paper. Funny, his father’s surname was that of Saint Sebastian’s, known as the patron saint of endurance and resilience, but that didn’t go on the certificate. It couldn’t. He was born a bastard child of the Saint: a white man, a scholar, an author, a good salary-man whose writing and name were printed in the newspapers, and the human mother: none of those things, she thought. This child was not holy, nor was it a virgin birth or a miracle.

    Romans 13:4

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,482
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    89
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Lucifer was his Creator's magus opus, but all creations misbehave once and a while. God simply has to keep his son in line.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,143
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    299
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Years after defeating Vecna and leaving Hawkins behind, Steve Harrington sees a once-familiar face at the grocery store. Confronting ghosts from his past makes him realize it’s time to let some things go.

    Or: Steve is becoming someone new, and the first step is letting Eddie cut his hair.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,547
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    19
    Kudos:
    405
    Bookmarks:
    44
    Hits:
    2,139
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Vox is a televangelist, preaching a sin-free life of virtue to his adoring audience (with more than a few forged checks and hidden deals, of course.)

    Alastor, who’d died a few decades beforehand, is back on Earth to send a few unfortunate souls on their way down to temptation.

    Whatever could happen between them?

    (Human-ish AU.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,787
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    147
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    2,496
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Jesus Christ of Nazareth wakes up after a bar crawl and sex party gone wrong to find himself in the middle of a huge fight between inappropriately-dressed young woman and big scary monsters.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,403
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    38
    Kudos:
    45
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    736
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Elliot was just a normal girl. With a normal life. Until she was transported to the Hazbin hotel universes!
    Not much plot. More just having fun!

    Work on pause

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,554
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    27
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    682

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